-Kurama-
.
"What does the old monkey think he's doing?! Banning coffee for minors! What kind of law is that?! What, is caffeine the new alcohol? Maybe the kids are smoking coffee grounds behind school during their free time? There is no reason for such a stupid law! I know exactly what you're doing, you living wrinkle! You want to stop Naruto's insomnia training! Well, too bad for you! You've just created a whole new opportunity!"
"Hey, Naruto, have you ever thought about smuggling training?"
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-Naruto-
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Naruto's pretty sure that Fuzzy's just being petty right now, but he made a very good argument. Ninja tend to do a lot of less-than-legal stuff, and he's bound to have to smuggle something at least once or twice in his career. Plus, this can be a great money making scheme. Naruto nodded to himself. Kurama wins this time.
Naruto's gonna start a black (coffee) market.
Naruto starts by observing actual smugglers. Well, as close as he can get. He hides in the "less nice" parts of town to watch how those people operate. Naruto figured that he can get in some espionage training too, so he's careful to practice mimicking people and building a persona for his coffee business. He ends up with a sort of decent impersonation of a drug dealer, and has his black market up and running in a week.
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-Fugaku-
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Fugaku sighs as he runs his hand through his hair tiredly. Whoever the ringleader of this "black" market is absolutely impossible to track down. It's like he can somehow just... disappear off the face of the earth at the drop of a hat. The whole police force is run completely ragged from trying to track him for the last few weeks. They've even stooped to asking the ANBU for help, only for them to come up empty-handed, too. This whole coffee debacle is going to be the death of him.
Don't get him wrong, Fugaku definitely sees the point of the law. Anything to stamp down, even just a little bit, on the crazy troublemaker's reign of terror. Putting him through caffeine withdrawal seemed to be a good idea. But when the police force and the ANBU are both too exhausted to focus on other things, like serious crime and protecting the borders, and the brat somehow still manages to get coffee, it's just time to cut your losses. Fugaku sighs again, and gets up to schedule a meeting with the Hokage to convince him to repeal his coffee ban.
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-Kurama-
.
Kurama is very pleased. Aside from the fact that he got to stick it to the fossil (take that, stupid monkey!), his kit is showing clear progress. Being able to set up a black market and get away with it in a village like Konoha is no easy feat, and Naruto did it before he even turned seven. He is definitely getting a reward for that performance. Come to think of it, Naruto's birthday is in a few months, isn't it? Kurama should figure out what kind of dream to do...
.
Naruto is oblivious to Kurama's thoughts, as he is far too busy replacing Jiji's tobacco with coffee grounds to go to sleep.