Summary: Laxus finds Natsu and Gray don't actually fight anymore, only argue. So he calls them out on it…..chaos ensues. Inspired by RackaRacka 'Roommate Fist Fight' on Youtube.
Pairings: General Crack, Natsu/Gray/Gajeel/Jellal/Laxus friendship, Implied Laxus/Mira, mentions of Natsu/Lucy and Gray/Juvia, Implied Jellal/Erza.
It was a rare peaceful day inside the Fairy Tail boys only mansion.
Mansion?
Yes you heard that right, during a mission, Natsu ended up getting a whole ass mansion as a reward. It was cool as hell, the place had multiple floors, a swimming pool, a pool table, a bar etc.
The best part was, only boys were allowed, which meant, unless given permission, the girls like Erza and Mira weren't allowed in.
(It had taken a great deal of restraint from Erza to not bash Natsu over the head when he made fun of her from inside the damn mansion)
The boys would spend end up moving in as the place was big enough for everyone. It became their equivalent to Fairy Hills.
Currently Laxus, Gajeel, Jellal (He recently joined the guild), Natsu and Gray were all in the kitchen chilling…..until Natsu and Gray started arguing.
None of the other guys could tell you what they were arguing about, just know it was probably something stupid.
Though Laxus couldn't help but frown, while he had grown from his arrogant mentality and was much more mellowed out, he couldn't help but find it lame how Natsu and Gray never actually fought anymore, they just shouted at each other.
So of course he made his thoughts known.
"You know," He started getting Natsu and Gray's attention, "You two are acting like a couple of pussies."
Both men instantly stopped their arguing and turned to the lightening dragon slayer with looks of shock and anger.
"What the hell are you on about?" Gray asked, crossing his arms.
Laxus shrugged, "I'm just saying, you two don't fight like you used to."
"Hey! We so do fight!" Natsu shouted incredulously, "Just the other day, I slapped Gray in the back of the head."
"For no fucking reason, might I add."
"Maybe, but I'm just saying back when you were younger, you both used to really go at it. I'm talking about, you both would be covered in bruises and bleeding all over. It used to be enough to give Erza heart attacks." Laxus said, reaching on the counter for a cookie (which Mira made for him).
He took a bite, before speaking again, "Now though, you guys don't fight at all. You just spout a lot of hot air at each other."
Leaning against the stove, Gajeel grinned, "Gihi, he's right you know. You two haven't fought at all ever since ya started hanging around with Bunny Girl and Rain woman."
Both boys got small blushes at that, but quickly fought it down, in favour of glaring at Laxus.
"So you find we throw hands do ya?" Natsu growled, walking up to Laxus, who raised an eyebrow.
Faster than anyone could react, Natsu decked the taller male right in the nose.
Laxus dropped the cookie and grabbed his nose. He groaned in what appeared to be more annoyance than pain.
"How's that for throwing hands, you jackass!" Natsu shouted with a triumphant grin.
Laxus growled, glaring at the younger dragon slayer, "Oh you motherfucker!" He then gave Natsu a hard right hook, sending the flamebrain, stumbling back into the dishwasher.
Before Laxus could continue, Jellal of all people walked up to Laxus. Though it was clear that the usual calm and collected mage was drunk, given the red flush on his cheeks.
"What the fuck are you fucking doing you fucking bitch!?" He slurred glaring at Laxus.
The leader of the Thunder Legion sighed, "Jellal, man you're drunk, go to be-BAM
Laxus didn't get to finish his sentence as Jellal gave him a quick jab in the mouth.
"Quit provoking Natsu!" Jellal growled, though he was really wabbly on his feet.
"Jellal!" Natsu exclaimed grabbing Jellal by his shoulder, turning the blue haired man around and punching him in the face.
"This is my fight." Natsu said.
He was then grabbed by the back of his scarf, turned around and was headbutted by Gray, "Don't hit my friends!" The Ice mage said.
Natsu responded with a straight jab at his nose, sending Gray stumbling back into the counter.
Laxus grabbed Natsu by the back of his scarf (Why do people always do that?), but before he could do anything, Natsu grabbed one of the plates and smashed it over Laxus' head.
Jellal then came back into the fray and punched Natsu right in the face, before grabbing another plate and smashing it over a still recovering Gray's head.
Laxus then gave Jellal a right hook, sending the former vigilante to the floor.
Laxus then stalked towards Natsu, who held the counter for balance, as he gave a hard kick to the blonde's chin, sending him crashing to the ground and knocking over the trash can.
Jellal, who had returned to his feet then grabbed Natsu by the collar of his jacket and started repeatedly punching him in the face.
Gajeel who had been sitting down this whole time, finally joined in. Pushing Jellal off of Natsu and decking the poor pink haired male in the face, before grabbing the back of his head and slamming it into the stove.
Natsu quickly recovered and delivered a right hook to Gajeel, stunning the iron dragon.
Laxus returned from his visit with the ground and decked Natsu in the face, causing him to stumble out of the kitchen.
Laxus ran after him, but was meet with a gut punch, briefly knocking the wind out of the big guy. Natsu then started going off on the blonde with rights and lefts, sending him further down the hall.
Natsu then grabbed Laxus by the collar of his shirt and heabutted the guy. He however missed Gajeel behind him, who smashed his communication Lacrima over Natsu's head, causing the fire dragon to fall to the ground.
Gray then came running down the hall and drop kicked Gajeel in the back, sending him crashing into Laxus' stomach. Though Gajeel seemed to have taken more damage at that (Freed was not lying when he claimed Laxus had abs of steel)
Jellal appeared, putting a box over Gray's head and then repeatedly punching the ice mage.
Gajeel found a bottle of water and poured it on Natsu's face, walking the guy up again. The black haired dragon slayer, then grabbed Natsu up, before throwing him back on the ground again.
As Natsu tried to get up, Jellal came and pushed him back hard on the ground.
Gajeel then got a punching bag and whacked Jellal with it. Gajeel was then grabbed by his hair by Laxus, who decked him across the face, sending the guy to the ground.
Natsu, seeing some room for payback, grabbed a box full of trophies (It belonged to the original owner of the mansion) and smacked Gajeel in the face with it.
Laxus then grabbed Jellal and put him in a fireman's carry position, before spinning around for a bit. He then dropped Jellal on the ground hard, causing the heavenly body mage to groan in pain.
Laxus was then pushed to the ground by Natsu and Gajeel, who both smirked and high fived each other. Only for Natsu to quickly deck Gajeel in the nose while he was distracted.
Natsu somehow found a glass pane and smashed it over Gajeel's head.
He then grabbed a still dizzy and drunk Jellal and threw him over the couch in the living room.
Natsu then dragged Gajeel to the piano (Freed plays) and started smashing his head into the keys.
Jellal came back for revenge and grabbed Natsu by the back of his head, before slamming the dragon slayer into the keys.
As Natsu was dazed from the surprise attack, he didn't notice Gray behind him, as the stripping snowman then poked Natsu in his eyes.
Natsu let out a howl of pain as Gray took off, "GRAY!" He shouted as he chased after his rival.
Natsu then had Gray cornered in the game room, before jumping off the table to deliver a superman punch to the ice wizard.
While Gray staggered, Natsu grabbed a case full of CDs (That may have belonged to Laxus) and cracked Gray over the face with them.
He then grabbed his rival and slammed his head straight through the glass table in the game room.
Natsu then took up a piece of broken glass and smashed it over Gray's head (It was a miracle none of them were bleeding).
Gray, seeing an opening quickly decked Natsu in the nuts, which caused him to whimper. Gray then grabbed his scarf and used that to throw Natsu into the couch, tipping it over.
Gray followed this up by grabbing a leg from the destroyed table and he hit Natsu on the side of the face, causing the man to groan in pain.
"Isn't it supposed to break?" Gray questioned, looking confused.
Natsu shook his head, "It didn't break because you hit me on the side of the face." He explained, "You're supposed to hit me over the head, here lemme show you."
Gray then stupidly handed Natsu the table leg…who cracked him over the head with it, fully knocking Gray out.
At least the leg was broken.
Natsu was then tackled into the front yard by Laxus, who smashed him into a wall.
Following after them was Jellal and Gajeel, who was being sprayed in the face with some cleaning supplies by Jellal.
As Gajeel pushed him off, he didn't see Natsu who cracked him in the side of the face with a garbage can, he then proceeded to empty its contents onto Gajeel.
Jellal then quickly punched Natsu into the wall, before grabbing him by the throat and throwing him across the yard.
Gajeel came back for some revenge and gave Natsu a nasty headbutt.
But Natsu recovered fast and managed to run and deliver a jumping knee right to Jellal's jaw.
The fire dragon wasn't done as he got out a bat from somewhere and swung. He hit Jellal hard in the stomach and then whacked him straight in the jaw.
Natsu quickly turned around to hit Laxus in the belly, only for the bat to not do any damage.
Laxus grinned smugly, "Heh, the hell was that supposed to d-OOF!"
He once again was cut off as Gajeel smashed a vase over his head, knocking him to the ground.
Natsu then smacked Gajeel across the face with the bad, sending him to the ground. He then repeatedly started hitting the iron dragon with the bat.
Jellal showed up and grabbed a hold of the weapon before punching Natsu across the face and taking hold of the bat.
Jellal gave a sadistic chuckle, very reminiscent of his villain days and smacked Natsu on his left cheek with the bat.
He then turned around to Gajeel who was on his knees, before cracking him upside the jaw.
While the fighting was going on, the boys had completely forgotten that their mansion was next to Fairy Hills, so it was only a matter of time before one of the girls heard the commotion.
Erza opened the window from the dorm, "What the hell is going on here?!" She growled, annoyed at the boys being so noisy, this early.
Unfortunately Jellal had threw the bat at Gajeel who ducked and the weapon flew and hit Erza straight in the face, sending her tumbling back inside.
The boys immediately stopped their fight and stared in horror, Jellal was so scared that he sobered up immediately, even Gray who just woke up looked on in terror.
Slowly all five boys looked to each, before they all said one word in unison, "Run."
And so they did, bolting from their mansion and into the forest to hide out for a few days.
However just as they did that, Freed, Bickslow, Macao and Wakaba all came back from shopping for food and other things.
They saw the place in a wreck and it didn't take them long to realize that the other guys had started a fight.
What did surprise them was the sight of a furious Erza, wearing her black purgatory armor, glaring at them with a look that could freeze hell.
"You're dead." She hissed in a terrifying voice.
The four men clung to each other and screamed in terror as Erza went to town on them.
Fortunately Erza didn't destroy the mansion…Unfortunately Erza had found the five boys who started the fight in the first place.
She let Jellal off with a head smack, mostly because he was drunk for the whole thing. (And because she was so whipped for him)
Natsu, Gray, Gajeel and Laxus…..weren't so lucky.
Natsu forever blames Laxus for this whole thing. The fucker just had to open his damn mouth!
A/N: Yes this story is inspired by 'Tales of Fairies'. You guys can also give requests on what scenarios you want