We walked in single file into the forest of Mirkwood and soon the light from our entrance was little more than a bright, small hole far behind. It then disappeared altogether as we rounded a bend and the muted gloom became whole.
The path, which was most overgrown and difficult to see, consisted of crumbling stepping stones pressed deep into the earth, all but invisible under the soft, rotten blanket of leaves. It wove in and out among the trunks in a most infuriating manner.
Yet at first we were still light-hearted from our rest at Beorn's; well-fed and watered, and with the comfort of fresh supplies on our backs. Occasionally a bright beam of sun filtered through the tangled mess of branches and lit our way for a few moments. We were glad for this, a sweet reminder of the bright, clear world beyond the sick and shaded woodland. I was almost disappointed; Gandalf's warnings about the magic of the forest had made me expect something more, well, magical to happen within my first few steps under the trees. Yet, apart from the usual ominous feelings one gets while creeping through a shadowy forest, I did not see - or suffer - anything truly supernatural.
The going was slow as Dwalin and Thorin at the front painstakingly kept track of the path, stopping every few paces in order kick back the leaves to ensure the marking stones were still underfoot. Eventually Kili lagged behind to whisper to me, claiming he was growing bored.
"So have you talked to him?" he asked softly, pointing to his chin towards the front of the group where I could just make out the hat of the dwarf to which he was referring.
I sighed and shrugged. "I've tried to, but he doesn't seem interested in talking to me... he hardly seems to even look at me now."
"Ah well, just keep bugging him. I'm sure he'll come around." Kili said lightly, despite his frown.
"Will he?" I replied sceptically. "I feel I'm just making a fool out of myself."
Kili shot me an inquisitive glance and I bit my lip in frustration before continuing.
"I mean, first off, is it even possible for a dwarf to consider a human remotely attractive?"
Kili seemed to seriously contemplate this while looking me up and down, and I soon regretted asking the question in the first place. I felt myself begin to blush under his scrutiny, especially when a cheeky grin spread across his face.
"It's possible." he said finally with a reassuring nod. "I mean, sure, you're too tall and bald and slim for most dwarf's tastes... But if you can get past all that..." He tilted his head from side to side thoughtfully, smirking all the while.
"Careful, or all that praise will go right to my head." I retorted tartly, shoving him a bit as we walked but smiling despite myself. There was no denying that Kili was rather attractive himself, and a prince at that. If I hadn't been so captivated by Bofur, I would likely find myself nursing a different affection. Still, his appraisal, playful as it was, left me feeling somewhat warm.
As we continued deeper into the forest the air became thick and heavy in my chest. It soon felt as if I could not quite take a full and proper breath, and this made me feel weary and very cross. The silence also began to press in all around us and became so deep that even our soft footfalls seemed to draw the attention of the entire forest, the trees appearing to bear down on us with watchful animosity.
We did not stop for supper that day, as the light - what little there was beneath the trees - began to fade. The world all about us had changed from dancing patterns of brightness filtering through the leaves, to a perpetual twilight, making the passage of time during the day little more than a best guess. The 'road' seemed to be made with the sole purpose of losing those that followed it, and I couldn't help but wonder how dangerous the alternative routes were if this was what Gandalf considered safe.
My hair snagged on an outreaching branch and pulled free of its tie. I tried to look for it, but the ground was too shadowed and the dwarves behind me impatient, bustling me forward to keep up with the line.
Hours slipped by and after what seemed an age of careful silence the dwarves seemed to grow restless and began complaining.
"Air... I need air." Bofur lamented from somewhere behind me.
"My head, it's swimming!" Óin added loudly and much closer. I cringed at the sudden noise, having been in an almost sleep-like trance while walking.
Fili, just ahead of me, looked back over his shoulder while holding back a low hanging vine that stooped down into my way. I thanked him as I passed. "We should have made for the Old Forest Road." he remarked to Kili, whom he also held the vine for, but not quite long enough resulting in the vine brushing against the back of Kili's head.
Kili swatted at it in frustration, then glared half at his brother, half at the forest in general as he cursed under his breath. "This elven path is as ill-natured as its makers."
Dwalin grumbled back at the pair, overhearing their conversation from up ahead in one of the worryingly more common pauses to find our path. "What else can you expect from a people who skip and dance their way through life? The effeminate elven tart who built this likely thought it was all in good fun."
Kili leaned closer to Fili and I, and nodded in Dwalin's direction. "He's just jealous that they're better skippers and dancers than he is."
From the look on Dwalin's face, he heard the comment. The warrior's massive fists bulged and his body trembled with pent up aggression. I silently wondered if he might even explode if he didn't get to punch something at least once a day.
"You little..." he spat.
"Dwalin, come on!" Thorin shouted.
Kili was likely only spared from a good thrashing by the discovery of the path once more. Dwalin gave one last scathing look at the three of us before turning to follow.
"We found the bridge!" Kili yelled as we came up to the edge of the water.
I had lost track of the number of days we had spent meandering through the eternal dusk of Mirkwood. We had made camp several times, yet I was beginning to suspect that our days were stretching into each other, and nights were being missed. The weariness in my body suggested I was sorely lacking in sleep.
I took in the scene as I scrambled forward out of the trees. I saw the path leading up to a bridge. I saw two parts of a whole bridge. In the middle though, decidedly the most important part, there was in fact no bridge at all.
"Are there better bridges than this on the Old Forest Road?" I questioned Fili.
"Er... ah... no." He admitted, raising a hand to scratch the back of his head in what I took to be an almost embarrassed gesture. "At one time maybe, but now, no."
Kili spoke up with what little defence he could for his brother.
"I hear there's a boat."
"A boat would go a long way towards helping us here." I observed, making my way up to the bank of the wide, slow flowing body of water. The stream, black as ink, spread out in front of us, still as glass. Beorn had warned not to drink from, or even touch, the dark waters.
By that time, the rest of the group had caught up. Bilbo and Bofur stepped past us to look over the edge of the crumbling structure.
"We could try to swim it." Bofur suggested most unhelpfully, leaning forward on his mattock as he gazed down at the stream.
"Didn't you hear what Gandalf said?" Thorin rebuked. "A dark magic lies upon this forest. The waters of this stream are enchanted."
"Doesn't look very enchanting to me." Bofur replied sceptically. I couldn't help but grin at him, but he was too busy staring at the water to notice.
Thorin urged the group to think of another way to cross. Kili wandered over to the gnarled trees that grew up from the banks and grabbed hold of a large vine. "These look strong enough." he said and moved to begin climbing them, but his uncle ordered him back.
"We send the lightest first." Thorin said, looking quickly between Bilbo and myself. He then nodded at the hobbit.
I felt a little affronted, as, though I was taller than Bilbo, he was much stockier than I. Yet watching Bilbo as he was forced to strike out over the water, desperately clinging to vines and branches (and looking quite displeased with his situation), my feelings of insult quickly turned to relief. My sympathy for Bilbo was short lived, however, as whether due to the hobbit's apparent success, or some judgement impaired by the magic of the forest, Thorin did not even give Bilbo time to reach the far shore before urging the dwarves en-mass out onto the vegetation above the stagnant waters. I hesitated, watching with combined shock and horror as Bilbo nearly fell in. As each dwarf ventured out over the river though, they seemed emboldened, to the point where the forerunners were leaping like squirrels from vine to vine.
I hurried after them, urged along by the remaining few on my side of the river - a combination of those smart enough to wait to see the outcome of Bilbo's attempt, and those who seemed frightened of the water in general. As I crept along one of the sturdier of the vines, I heard a splash up ahead.
Bofur shouted out, snapping my attention forwards to watch as he, and a few of the others, rushed to the far shore and began to drag Bombur, the cause of the splash, free from the stream.
"No!" I hissed frantically, but before I could hasten to join the rescue I heard a gasp from alongside me. Ori, caught up in the moment, missed his grip and fell forward, directly past me. I lunged, catching the back of his cloak tight in my grasp while my other hand anchored me in place.
We both halted and I screamed through clenched teeth at the strain of trying to support both our weights, feeling my healing shoulder protest such a strenuous movement. For such a slight dwarf he seemed as heavy as an ox. My body was leaning out diagonally, the young dwarf's almost completely parallel to the water below. I could see his reflection in the water, desperate and afraid as one who truly believed in the dark magics this forest could hold.
Dori came to our rescue.
Freeing a length of vine, he threw it over an overhanging branch and grabbed both ends, which he used to sturdy himself while he leaned in low to grab Ori and relieve me of his weight. From there he was, in turn, hauled in by Nori, while I managed to right myself, now freed of the burden. I left the brothers to sort themselves out and made landfall a short distance away from the commotion being caused by the rescue of Bombur.
I approached, calling out to Bofur as I did.
"Is he alright?"
No response from the dwarf, or any of the others for that matter as they hustled about. I tried again.
"Bofur, is he breathing!?"
Bofur did not even turn to look at me, but responded curtly.
"Yes, he's alive! Now go make yourself useful and help the others to shore."
With that he squared his shoulders away from me, and I tried to busy myself with the task he had delegated to me, all the more heartbroken and unable to process why my genuine concern had been met with such hostility. I lent a steady hand to Nori, and from there my thoughts flowed as dark as the depths of the stream.
We set out shortly thereafter at Thorin's behest. The growing urgency of their timeline was wearing on them, especially with the burden of a spell-bound sleeping Bombur adding to frustrations. I was not asked to help carry the stretcher, and so I followed close to the front, eager to get to the forest's end and once again feeling unwelcome as the dwarves set to their task. With growing urgency of my own, I followed Thorin and his pathfinders, and hoped that soon I could be free of this forest, and free from these stubborn, reckless, paranoid, grudge-holding dwarves.
At some point along the way we became well and truly lost.
The road became a path, and the path became a track, and we lost track of the track. And Bombur woke up. And the trees began to move again, and there were lights beyond them, and someone started singing at one point, and we went towards the lights, but the trees kept moving.
I made friends with a blue butterfly. No one else in the company was my friend.
... Except Kili and Fili.
... And Dori and Ori seemed very pleased to have me along now.
But the one dwarf who mattered didn't seem to pay any attention to me at all.
In fact, there seemed to be a whole lot of not paying attention going on, if losing the path - the ONE thing we were told NOT to do - was any indication. In any case, we ambled on and on and on, and our supplies steadily dwindled, though I don't remember ever stopping to eat.
There were also spider webs. Spider webs everywhere. I started feeling them against my cheek and each time I gasped loudly, causing the dwarves around me to jump in alarm and stop as I madly tried to brush them off. Yet I kept feeling them. They were all around me, tickling my face, keeping me on the cusp of panic. In a moment of clarity I realized it was only my hair and I sheepishly wondered why I had felt so alarmed. Soon however, the strands stopped being wispy like webs and instead began to cling to my face and neck as the forest grew, if possible, even more stifling and I began to sweat. I tucked them behind my ears in annoyance only to have them fall forward once more after just a few steps.
Dizziness clouded my vision and I shook my head in attempts to clear it, trying to keep my thoughts focused on following the dwarf ahead of me. Fili. I studied his golden hair for a long while. It's lovelier than most girls'. I chuckled at the thought, and then remembered my own hair. It was sticky. I felt sick. I needed to cut it off. That's it! That would surely make me feel better. It would help me focus... I needed to focus... Gandalf warned me... Focus... My thoughts trailed off as I saw a slim, rare sliver of sunlight that managed to pass the seemingly impenetrable canopy and illuminate a small patch of the forest floor in golden light. Gold... Like Fili's hair... Hair...
"Fili. Lend me a knife." I said loudly, causing several of the dwarves to stop yet again. Fili looked back at me, his expression somewhat dazed so I held out my hand.
"Knife... Now... Hurry."
He slowly grabbed one from a sheath inside his coat and handed it to me. Some of the others continued to stumble along. I reached behind my neck and grabbed my hair, pulling it all over my shoulder.
"What are you doing?" Fili asked quietly, squinting at me as he did so.
I grinned as I took my long hair in a firm grip with one hand and lifted the knife with the other. I was ready to make the cut and was just about to slice across it when Kili stepped up behind me and stayed my hand.
"Don't" Kili said firmly, prying the weapon from my fingers. He then looked to his brother. "Why did you give her a knife?"
Fili hesitated, then shrugged. "Ah, well it seemed like a good idea at the time." he replied. "I wasn't thinking."
"Give it back, I'll feel better if I just cut it off." I pleaded, trying to make them understand.
Kili handed the knife to his brother. "Tell them to wait." he said, and then looked back to me. I heard Fili call to the group to stop. "Sit." Kili ordered, pushing my shoulders until I obliged and dropped to the ground. He stepped behind me then gathered up my hair, pulling it all to the back. He beckoned Fili to help, and I felt my hair being parted and tugged on from all angles as they braided it back, away from my face. Finally they were done and Kili pulled me to my feet. I reached up and felt a few elaborate plaits leading into one larger braid that hung down my back, secured with a metal clasp. I smiled in thanks and we were able to continue. I felt slightly better for a few minutes… or hours, it was hard to tell, but eventually the forest's magic began to impact me once more.
I became increasingly paranoid that we were being watched. The lights I saw twinkling amidst the trees earlier had turned into eyes. Small eyes. Big eyes. Peering out through the dark at us for only a second before they blinked into disappearance. I kept almost tripping, as I failed to watch where I was putting my feet but instead stared intently between the trees, trying to see to what the eyes belonged. I became frightened of them. They were watching me. They were going to come for me. The others didn't notice. The eyes were only for me. They were getting closer. I scrambled forward and grabbed onto a dwarf. It was Gloin. He eyed me sternly and tugged out of my grasp, and I apologized, my embarrassment chasing away the memory of what I had been scared of in the first place.
We stumbled to a halt. The trees were still moving. Or was it my head spinning? I squeezed my eyes shut and when I opened them the forest had stopped waving about, but now the ground was uneven. I teetered on the edge of falling with each step I took, until I finally found a still spot where I stood quite motionless for a few moments, as even tilting my head slightly seemed to bring on a wave of dizziness.
I looked at my comrades and felt the urge to prove I knew who they were. I belonged with them after all, despite their unfriendly opinions. I knew them. I began rattling off each of their names in my head, I went through them all, and then I did it again. My thinking unknowingly turned into muttering as I listed them off over and over, feeling gleeful that I did it correctly every time. I knew them after all.
"What hour is it?" Thorin shouted suddenly to no one in particular.
"...bofur-bombur-bifur-kili-fili-gloin-Óin..."
" I don't know." Dwalin muttered loudly. "I don't even know what day it is!"
"...ori-dori-nori." I paused in thought then stated: "It must be Dwalin's Day... balin-dwalin-thorin..."
Dori picked up something off the ground. "Look, a tobacco pouch." he said ominously. "There's dwarves in these woods."
"fili-kili-dori-nori-tori-ori-bifur-baffer-gaffer..."
" Dwarves from the Blue Mountains no less." Bofur explained. "This is exactly the same as mine..."
"...bofurbofurbofur..." I mumbled softly. I was stuck in a loop, my eyes drawn to the dwarf who had just spoken who was now spinning slowly in a circle. I remembered I was MAD at him, so why was I spouting his name like a gurgling drainpipe? I raised my hands to stop my lips from moving, but one more thing slipped out.
"It must be Loin's!" I added, pleased to be able to contribute yet another helpful fact to the conversation. I dropped my hands and smiled - the same smile I could picture Bofur smiling the day at Beorn's house, proud as I could - then realized I was likely making as much a fool of myself as he was then. This was driven home by the weird look Bilbo gave me, which twisted my grin into a timid, embarrassed smile.
"Who?" he asked, in disbelief at how stark raving mad I was acting, and then shook his head. "Bofur, that's because it IS yours, do you understand? We're going around in circles, we are lost!"
The group degenerated into squabbling then, doing more than enough talking to fill the silence I had felt obligated to fill before. Something about losing the sun, I wasn't quite paying attention, but Bilbo was climbing a tree, and it seemed like a good idea at that moment, so I started to follow him up.
It was harder than I thought it would be, and the branches were clinging and grabbing at my arms, and clothes, and hair. The sticks were sticky. I thought I had problems, until I saw Bilbo do a reverse swan dive into a white webbed sheet, followed by the biggest spider I had ever seen.
No, the second biggest. The biggest was right above me. I screamed, let my grip on the tree go, fell backwards and hit the ground hard. With the wind knocked out of me, I hardly registered getting swept up by the arms of the spider, hoisted into the air and spun round and round and round. This made me nauseous, and it was all I could do to take a deep breath and shut the world out.
I woke to a brief feeling of weightlessness followed by a somewhat jarring impact as I landed on my side on the ground. I felt extremely claustrophobic as I was still wound tight with webs, but I violently kicked and thrashed about until I managed to free my hands and arms. I tore the sticky silk off my face, feeling more revived and clear-headed after a few deep breaths then I had since entering the accursed forest. All the dwarves appeared to be on the ground around me, in various stages of cleaning themselves of the webbing as well.
After clearing off my legs I stood up and looked around for Bilbo. Movement in the distance caught my eye, and I took a few steps forward, trying to peer past the twisted trees, but it was not the hobbit. My scream rent the air once more as the beastly spiders raced towards us. I stumbled backwards, utterly terrified of these new horrors, and felt a hand grip around my arm and pull me behind the rank of dwarves. A few had lost their weapons and now brandished large branches, while those lucky enough to have had theirs safe in a scabbard when they were wound up now drew them and prepared to fight. I, however, stood helplessly behind them all, eyes wide and battling only the urge to bolt.
As the spiders descended upon us, all madness broke loose. They seemed to come from every direction. Fili, somehow noticing my defenceless state amidst the chaos, shoved a small but heavy sword in my hand.
I mostly avoided conflict by flinching and ducking as the others smashed into the creatures around me. Eventually I dodged my way into the hollow of a large trunk on the edge of the fight. I knew I was being a coward, and I was ashamed of it, but I was more afraid of these abominations than anything I'd yet encountered. I was quite terrified of small spiders, let alone these giants. I peered back out towards the battle. Though a great many spider carcasses now littered the area, the dwarves did not seemed to have made any headway at all. More and more kept appearing, even dropping down from above. The dwarves were struggling. I cursed and, after a moment of trying to harden my nerves, I stepped out of hiding and ran to the aid of Nori. I swung my sword as hard as I could at the leg of the goliath he was fighting. The brittle limb gave way, causing the creature to become off-balance and giving Nori the opportunity to finish it off. He yelled a quick thanks at me before rushing off to help some others.
I barely had the chance to register another monster rushing at me. I quickly righted my grip on the weapon and tried to strike it as it came upon me, but it was too quick, and too clever, and in a blindingly fast move it had knocked the sword from my hand with one of its slim front legs and proceeded to push me over. I scrambled backwards, nearly blind with panic, but it was relentless in its pursuit. I could see its disgusting claspers gnashing at me, its many black eyes watching me hungrily.
I felt my fear well at the back of my throat and I screamed Bofur's name without even knowing it. But I needn't have done so, as he was already there. I watched as he tugged the beast back. The spider turned away from me and made for him, but Bofur had already picked up my sword and was ready to strike. He plunged the weapon deep into the creature's head and it thumped to the ground, twitching. Bofur was still scowling as he looked to me, but his expression softened somewhat when I met his eyes; he hastily ran over and helped me to my feet.
"Bofur. Please. Get me out of here." I pleaded, my voice, and whole body for that matter, shaking uncontrollably. I took his hand and tried to pull him back towards the deep shadows of the forest, but he didn't budge. "Please." I tried once more, looking at him as best I could through the tears blurring my eyes. "I need to leave. Come with me. Run with me!"
A spider then rushed towards us and I half screamed, half sobbed and blanched away from it. My knees buckled and I fell forward and gripped the front of Bofur's coat. I squeezed my eyes shut, pressing my face into his shoulder and felt a strong, reassuring arm wrap round my waist. I felt his body tense and waited for the impact of the spider to take us down, but instead I heard an odd whirring noise followed by a squelch, and I looked to see the spider fall before us, an arrow sticking out of its head.
At first I thought it from Kili, but then the rest of the spiders began falling, arrows piercing their great hairy bodies. I noticed them then, the elves, and before I knew it there was an arrow aimed right at us. The elf warrior that stood before us, his bow drawn, seemed to raise an eyebrow when he took in the fact that I was a woman, a human woman, cowering into a dwarf, with a thick dwarf arm wrapped protectively around my middle. Though besides that small movement, that tiny arching of his brow, his face otherwise remained completely impassive. Bofur, by comparison, did not hold back in unleashing the most unpleasant sneer he could manage.
Everyone was then distracted as a commotion broke out nearby, followed by shouts that were instantly recognized by his brother as Kili's. The elves kept up their guard, however, and would let no one move. There were sounds of battle, then silence, and the company waited with baited breath. Everyone relaxed slightly as Kili was led back to the group, escorted by a female elf warrior. He looked almost sheepish as he was shoved amidst the others.
"Search them." one of the elves ordered. The female followed with a command in elvish.
I was torn away from Bofur and quickly padded down; though it was quickly apparent I had absolutely nothing on my person, so I watched the dwarves being divested of their remaining weapons and questioned about some of their other possessions as well. Though there was much grumbling and scowling, they did not seem to put up too much of a struggle. A blanket of fatigue began to cover me, not the dizzying, trance-like sleepiness that the forest had been inducing earlier, but genuine full-fledged exhaustion. I was sure the dwarves were tired as well after their fight, and I knew everyone was keen to leave the forest behind - perhaps even at the behest of elves.
The blonde-haired male giving orders was then presented with Thorin's sword. He spoke in his own tongue, appraising the blade almost lovingly, and then he looked to Thorin.
"Where did you get this?" he asked sternly.
"It was given to me." Thorin replied.
"Not just a thief, but a liar as well." The elf remarked before shouting another order I did not understand. Its meaning quickly became clear as the elves then urged us to move, shunting us into single file and flanking us on all sides.
The Wood-Elves of Mirkwood are not like their kin... They're less wise... And more dangerous.
Beorn's council was my only insight into the elves of Thranduil's woodland realm. His warnings proved all too true, though I was naive to how cunning their nature could truly be.
Our course took us far from the nest of spiders, and while the trees no longer seemed to move to bar our way, the trek was even more complex than before, and with the added complication of thick elven rope binding our hands. My eyelids started to become heavy, but if I slowed I was rewarded with a little push on the back of my shoulder by one of the guards. I glared at him each time he did so but, as expected, his expression remained blank.
By the time we neared our destination, I was so lost and we had walked for so long that I would not have been surprised to find myself right back where we had started. That was not the case, however.
There was a growing, tremulous rumble of rushing water ahead. As we reached the base of a small decline in the path, the forest canopy lifted away, revealing a monumental chasm. I could hear the echoed roar of the river's cascades far below.
Across the chasm, a stone bridge led to a gate set into the cliff face amongst monolithic pillars, which supported the weight of the stone above. As we crossed it, I began to feel the same refreshing sensation as in Rivendell. There was a subtle difference though. Where Rivendell was open to the sky, free in the mountain air, this place was suppressed beneath all the weight of the earth. The air here felt older, and heavy. While some of the dwarves grumbled and tugged, unaware to the magics around them, I allowed myself to be led willingly into the wondrous splendour of this hidden territory.
We thus entered the Woodland Realm of the Elven King.
We did not know at the time how hard it would be to leave it.