Maya DeLuca-Bishop had just woken up and gently leaned over to kiss her sleeping wife before heading out for her morning run. She quietly got herself ready and left the apartment to begin her jog. As Maya ran, she noticed that she felt more tired than usual. "Maybe I didn't sleep well," she thought to herself. Ultimately, she decided to shorten her run, turning around and heading back home after only two miles.
When she walked back in the door after her run, the delicious smell of French toast filled the air—her favorite. She headed into the kitchen to greet her pregnant wife. "Good morning, my love," Maya said, still glistening with sweat from her run. Carina looked up with a smile. "Buongiorno, bambina! How was your run?"
"It was good, but I need a shower," Maya replied. "I'll be quick, and then I will join you for breakfast." Maya leaned down to give her wife a kiss and placed her hand on Carina's very small bump before heading to the bathroom.
In the shower, Maya worked to wash away the sweat and fatigue from her run. As she cleaned herself, her fingers brushed against something on her chest—something she had never noticed before. Curiously, she felt around the spot and realized it was a lump. Her heart dropped, and a wave of fear washed over her. She paused, touching the area again, hoping it was just her imagination, but the lump remained.
Maya quickly finished her shower, putting on a brave face as she got dressed. She didn't want to burden her pregnant wife with her worries, so she pushed the thoughts aside and headed back to the kitchen.
Sitting at the breakfast table, Maya attempted to engage Carina in conversation about their day ahead. Carina shared her busy schedule at Grey Sloan Hospital, mentioning two scheduled C-sections and multiple appointments. While Maya tried to involve herself in the conversation, she found her mind drifting back to the lump on her chest, running through all the "what ifs." Despite Carina's eagerness to talk, a sense of unease lingered in Maya's thoughts, making her seem distant and distracted.
Carina noticed that Maya was quieter than usual; she knew her well and was always attentive to her moods. "Everything okay, bella?" she asked, concern etching her features.
Maya nodded, forcing a smile. "Yeah, I'm fine." Carina raised her eyebrows, unconvinced. "Really? You seem a bit off."
"Honestly, I'm okay. Everything is good," Maya insisted, though she could feel Carina's eyes still searching her face for the truth.
Carina sighed, wanting to press further but knowing she had to leave for work. "Alright, but if you need to talk, I'm here. I love you," she said, leaning closer to give Maya a soft kiss.
Maya melted at the warmth of her wife's affection. "I love you too," she replied, placing a gentle hand on Carina's belly. "And I love you," she whispered, feeling a mix of joy and anxiety over the upcoming addition to their family.
As Carina headed out the door, Maya watched her go, wishing she had told her wife about the lump she found. She reminded herself that she didn't want to stress Carina out. With a sigh, she finished getting ready for her shift at the station.
Maya arrived at Station Nineteen, where the familiar hustle and bustle were already in full swing. She threw herself into keeping busy—cleaning gear, working out in the station gym, and preparing equipment. These distractions helped ease her mind, but the concern about the lump occasionally flickered in the back of her thoughts, refusing to be completely ignored as she navigated her day.
Throughout the day, she tried to avoid most of the team, knowing that if she spent too much time around them, they would sense something was wrong. They were like family to her, and they knew her very well. As she busied herself with tasks, she focused on maintaining her composure, determined to push her worries aside, at least for now.
Later in the day, the klaxon rang, alerting them to a call they needed to respond to. Maya raced down to the engine, quickly donning her turnout gear before jumping into the fire truck.
She was assigned to search and rescue by Captain Beckett, and it was just the distraction she needed. Maya loved the feeling of running into a burning building to save lives; the adrenaline rush was unmatched and one of her favorite parts of the job.
The scene was reasonably chaotic—not a bad kind of chaos, but there were many bystanders, and they needed to rescue a large family of seven. This chaos was exactly what Maya needed today; it helped her take her mind off the morning's events.
With each bustling moment, she forgot about the lump and focused solely on being Lieutenant Deluca-Bishop, fully immersed in the adrenaline and urgency of the scene.
After the emergency call, the crew gathered back at the station and decided to order pizza. Maya really wanted to disappear into her bunk, but Ben encouraged her to join the team for dinner. She tried to say that she was going to the gym, but Ben, ever attentive, reminded her that she had already worked out multiple times during the day and ultimately convinced her to join.
Throughout dinner, the team debriefed about the call, exchanging stories and observations. Maya attempted to join in, trying to act normal, but her mind wasn't fully engaged.
Jack glanced at her, sensing that something was off. "Hey, Maya, you good? You seem a little distant today."
She hesitated, knowing he would see right through her if she claimed to be fine. Instead, she settled on, "Just a long day..." and offered a weak smile.
Jack looked at her, unconvinced, but he knew better than to push Maya, so he let it go for now.
Maya headed home after her shift, and as soon as she sat in her car, she felt the weight of her thoughts returning. The drive home became a blur, her mind racing with conflicting emotions. She felt the urge to confide in Carina, but worry crept in; she didn't want to be a burden or stress Carina out over something that might turn out to be nothing. Yet, the nagging thought persisted—what if it wasn't nothing, and she allowed it to slide, only for it to develop into something worse?
Her mind spun the entire drive home, grappling with the decision of whether to speak up or keep quiet. As she pulled into the parking lot and approached her apartment, the uncertainty weighed heavily on her, leaving her unsure about what to do.
When Maya walked in, she was greeted by the comforting scent of her wife's perfume—a smell that usually calmed her instantly. However, today, anxiety continued to swirl in her stomach. She noticed Carina curled up on the couch, a book resting in her lap, looking serene.
"Ciao, bambina!" Carina beamed, setting the book aside. "How was your day?"
Maya forced a smile, but the lump in her throat felt heavier. "It was good... How about yours?"
"Mine was good too! I delivered two little bambino safely and healthily," Carina shared, her face lighting up as she recounted her successful birth stories. She continued to talk about other events from her day at the hospital, but Maya found herself fading in and out of focus, unknowingly tuning out.
As Carina finished her story, she noticed that Maya hadn't been her usual self—she hadn't asked questions or engaged in the way she typically would. Reaching for Maya's hand, her expression shifted to one of concern. "You're not really okay, are you, bella?"
Maya met her gaze, feeling the warmth and love reflected back at her. In that moment, she knew she couldn't keep this secret any longer. "Um... I don't know... I think... ahh... I need to talk to you about something?"
Carina nodded, her eyes filled with concern. "Of course. Talk to me."
With a deep breath, Maya sat down next to Carina on the couch, taking another deep breath as she gathered her words.
The weight of the moment pressed heavily on her emotions, and it must have been obvious on her face as Carina noticed and reached for Maya's hand, offering a comforting squeeze that encouraged Maya to find the words she needed.
"Maya, I'm your wife; you can tell me anything," Carina reassured her, her voice gentle and steady.
With her heart racing, Maya finally began to speak, her words stumbling over each other. "In the shower this morning, I found a lump.. a lump in my breast. I... I don't know what it is, but what if it's... what if..." she couldn't finish her sentence.
"Oh, bambina..." Carina responded, her voice softening as she processed the news. "It's not good, is it?" Maya asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Carina pulled Maya into a tight embrace, feeling her own worries intensify as she held her wife close. The warmth and safety of the hug contrasted sharply with the fear that had settled over them. After a long moment, they pulled apart, and Carina softly asked, "Can I feel for it? Just to check?"
Maya nodded slowly, her heart pounding as she lifted Carina's hand under her shirt, guiding it to the spot where she discovered the lump. Maya's heart raced as Carina moved her hand across Maya's chest.
Carina swallowed hard, trying to suppress the rising fear within her. She gently explored the area, her touch tender yet purposeful. Normally, this kind of intimacy would feel sensual, but now it was fraught with anxiety.
As Carina searched, she glanced at Maya, whose gaze was fixed on the corner of the room, lost in her own thoughts. The fear in Maya's eyes was evident, and it tore at Carina's heart. Moments later, Carina's fingers brushed against something that shouldn't be there. A wave of dread washed over her.
Bringing her hand down, Carina met Maya's gaze, her heart sinking at the expression on her wife's face. "It's bad, isn't it?" Maya asked, her voice trembling.
Carina fought to keep her own emotions in check. "Hey, we don't know anything yet. We'll get you tested and go from there," she said, trying to infuse her words with hope. She cupped Maya's face with her hands, searching for any glimmer of reassurance. "We can't worry yet," she added, leaning in to press a soft kiss on her lips.
"Now, I'm going to call the hospital and try to get you in for a mammogram. I'll be right back, okay? I love you, bambina," Carina said, her voice steady despite the turmoil inside her as she left the room to make the call.
As soon as Carina stepped away, the weight of the moment crashed down on Maya, and she doubled over, crying into her palms. Each sob felt like a release of all the fear and uncertainty that had built up inside her throughout the day.
In the other room, Carina was silent, clutching her phone tightly as tears streamed down her cheeks. She pressed her eyes shut, desperately praying that this wasn't what she feared it to be. The weight of worry and love for her wife battled within her, and she struggled to maintain her composure as she made the call to the hospital.