The bar was lively as ever–tables filled with chatter, jukebox playing loudly, Carla running around insulting people. Lilith stiffened a little upon walking in due to all the activity, but Rebecca's presence acted as a shield. She took a seat at the end of the bar across from Norm without so much as a second thought.
"Hey, Dr. Sternin!" Woody said, a dumb grin plastered on his face. "Heard you were out to dinner with Miss Howe."
"Yes, I was, Woody."
"Well I just wanted to say, I think that's awesome that you're friends with Rebecca. Between you and me, I don't think she has many."
Before Lilith could even react, a new voice spoke up.
"You supporting charity or something?" Carla appeared out of nowhere as she maneuvered around Woody to grab a glass to pour Norm's beer. She was gone as suddenly as she'd appeared. Lilith looked up at Woody and shrugged.
"We ate dinner and talked. It was far from a charity event. Rebecca's a very kind pers-"
"Lilith!" Frasier appeared from the back room, holding his beer high above his head. "How was your night out?"
"I should be asking you, Frasier," Lilith raised her eyebrows, vocal tone decidedly sharp. He was, after all, the one who had been out at Cheers for the past few hours. She cleared her throat. "It was fine. Rebecca makes for good company."
She kept her words brief as Frasier made his way over to her, sure to interrupt if she continued on for much longer. The respect he held for her only seemed to go so far sometimes, especially after he'd been drinking. She felt more irritated with him than usual, despite coming off of her delightful meal with Rebecca. Frasier took a seat next to her.
She looked back to Woody– "Could I get a coffee?"
Frasier spoke up again, in response to her earlier statement, "Well, I'm glad. I wasn't so sure how pleasant Miss Cruella De Vil would be outside of her work."
The door to the office swung open with a large creak and out walked Rebecca as if cued by Frasier's wisecrack. Rebecca spoke loudly, "You know, Lilith, I just felt so uncomfortable with you paying… here, take some cash…"
Frasier raised an eyebrow and glared at Lilith as Rebecca placed a few dollar bills on the bar.
"You paid for her meal?" his tone changed, decidedly low and menacing. That was awful cheap of him, she thought sternly but had little visual reaction.
Lilith answered matter-of-factly, "I asked her to dinner, did I not?"
"Well, yes— but—"
Rebecca interrupted, "Lilith, we have to do this again. I'll pay next time, of course. I had a really great time."
A warm feeling filled Lilith as a smile crept onto her face.
"Sure, Rebecca. Thank you for coming with me tonight."
"My pleasure."
"Well, aren't you two pals!" Frasier said almost sarcastically, a little ticked off.
"Frasier, am I not allowed to have friends? This is immature behavior. I would almost guess that you're jealous that I am paying attention to someone other than yourself."
"I am not… I suppose I am getting snarky."
"Would you excuse us, Rebecca?" Lilith said, rolling her eyes and turning to Frasier. "I think we should call it a night and head home."
Frasier pouted for a moment, but then muttered a simple, "Alright." Lilith was glad he didn't pick a fight.
The two said their goodbyes and got up. Frasier let out a hefty sigh.
"In all honesty, I'm glad you're making friends at the bar. I know forming interpersonal relationships hasn't always been the easiest for you. I apologize for my rudeness."
Lilith led Frasier up the narrow stairs out of Cheers, keeping a quick pace as she moved through the cold.
"Thank you, Frasier. That means a lot coming from you."
(Did she envy him at all as he talked endlessly with his friends around the bar, night after night? Absolutely. Frasier blended in at Cheers, whereas anywhere outside of Lilith's work, she felt she stuck out like a sore thumb.)
There was a pause in their dialogue as they re-emerged on the sidewalk. Although Frasier quickly reached Lilith's side, only the noises of the city remained to fill the silence.
After a moment and paces from their car, Frasier was the first to speak.
"You know, I haven't seen you this happy in a while, and yet I feel our conversations are growing briefer and briefer. Am I—and I hate to say this as blatant as I feel I must—in any way making you uncomfortable within our conversations?"
"Not at all. I—"
Lilith felt the need to stop in her tracks but refrained. Would this be her breaking point? No. She had remained level-headed and withheld from saying anything regretful up until this point. But now that Frasier had brought up the fact that something was off, she couldn't help but consider being honest. Her senses felt clouded, leaving her to wonder— was a spontaneous confession really the answer?
There were two ways this conversation could go.
Route one: "I have just been taking some more time for myself. I apologize if that is taking away from our relationship."
Route two: "I've reevaluated over the past few weeks, and I'm not sure that we are an ideal partnership. I find there is pressure within our relationship for me to be something I am not."
She took route two.
"Good heavens. Whatever do you mean?"
Lilith took a deep breath.
"I can't be a traditional wife, though I'm sure you are aware of that. I'm abrupt and intimidating. I don't enjoy pretending to be somebody else for you. Also I–"
The truth she had been tiptoeing around for days.
"You what, Lilith?" Frasier's voice had a note of tenderness, though his concerned expression boasted only worry.
"I may be attracted to women."
There it was. Coffees with Rebecca spent endlessly in admiration, childhood infatuations with Dorothy, and the overwhelming sense of panic she had felt when remotely complemented by other women only offered one explanation Lilith could possibly fathom.
"You're telling me that I not only courted but married, a lesbian? Dear God, Lilith!"
Frasier had been sent over the edge. Lilith stood with her hands in her coat pockets, watching his face as he broke down. Part of her couldn't help but feel guilt. She'd hurt him, hadn't she? Although she felt no romantic love for him, as a friend she felt sorry for the pain she had caused.
This conversation had to happen at some point, she reminded herself. There was no avoiding it.
Frasier's initial outburst crumbled soon enough, and they stood on the sidewalk as nothing more than two, overemotional chums. Because that's what they were, weren't they? Two friends who had misinterpreted their friendship for something more than it was, only to meet a somewhat humiliating defeat on both ends.
She didn't have any excuses.
"I'm so sorry, Frasier. I only wish I had figured it out sooner."
"No, no, it's alright. I should have known when you brought Dorothy to town. I suppose there was nothing heterosexual about the way you two interacted."
Lilith rolled her eyes.
"She's just a friend, Frasier. I don't like all women that way, for Christ's sake!"
Frasier huffed.
"Okay, well, what do we do now?"
Lilith shifted a little in her stance, trying to warm herself up a bit and get the confidence to say what was necessary.
"Divorce seems like the most tangible option."
"Yes, I suppose it does."
Awkward silence once more took dominance of the conversation.
"We can still be friends, Frasier."
"I know."
A pause.
"Come here."
Lilith was reluctant to inch closer to Frasier but was thrown into a hug. Out of all the people she chose to tell first, at least he was a good one. He felt warm in the cold mess of the night, and she couldn't help but appreciate the embrace. It was an olive branch in what had initially been a nightmare of a reaction. After a moment, she hugged back.
A single thank you was all Lilith could manage.