Chapter 7

A sense of déjà vu

Dawn and Andrew were discharged from the hospital late in the afternoon. The Slayer's sister X-ray showed no internal injuries. Buffy had insisted on walking her home on campus but faced with her exasperation, she had resigned herself. The four young people parted ways in front of the building with the intention of meeting again as soon as Willow and Buffy had found out something about this sudden attack of demons.

The witch and the Slayer were silent on the ride home. While Willow's mind was racing, Buffy's was tired. She felt so good this morning and now… She unconsciously felt the weight of her position as the Slayer on her shoulders again.

"Buffy?" Her friend repeated, "Are you listening?"

"Eh?" The Slayer was pulled from her thoughts. "Sorry, Will, I was zoning out," she apologized.

"I noticed," the witch replied with a smile. "I said we'd better call Giles and tell him what happened."

"Yes, you're right. I'll call him as soon as we get home."

As soon as they arrived at Buffy's house, Willow got on the computer to do some research on demons based on the description that Dawn and Andrew had given them. For her part, Buffy went to the phone and dialed Giles' number in England.

"H-Hello?"

"Giles? Is that you?"

"Buffy, is that you?"

"Yes. I didn't recognize your voice. Is this a bad time?"

"No… Well, I was sleeping…" Buffy looked up at the living room clock and grimaced. It was probably 3am in England… "I'm sorry, Giles! I never know which way these time zones work!"

"Really?" Giles replied with a slight smile in his voice.

"Don't make fun of me, Giles! How are you doing?"

"Everything is fine, thank you. Life is very peaceful around here."

"Good. That's good," Buffy said. She was nervous and Giles didn't fail to notice. "Tell me, Buffy. You didn't call to ask how I'm doing, did you?"

"No… Well, I mean I'm interested to know if everything's okay but there's something else…"

"What is it? Is everything all right?"

"Yes, everything's fine but… Dawn and Andrew were attacked by a group of demons this morning," she said suddenly.

Giles was silent for a few moments, probably digesting the information. "Well, it's… Are you sure? I mean, lately, demons are…"

"I'm sure, Giles," the Slayer insisted.

"It's very surprising… And how are they?"

"Oh, it's okay. Dawn only has a few scratches and Andrew has a broken arm."

"Were they able to give a description of these demons?"

"Dawn said they had horns, great strength and awful heads."

"I see. This is a very accurate description."

"They were at the movies, it was dark. They couldn't see much… Giles, do you think that…" Buffy's voice shook slightly but she recovered. "Do you think this is a sign that the First hasn't been completely destroyed?"

"To tell the truth, I don't know. The First cannot completely disappear. It is part of humanity and each human has a part of it."

"But… what did we destroy then?" The Slayer asked, suddenly lost.

"It was its incarnation. Whatever might be happening now, the First has been extremely weakened, not only because Spike destroyed all the Turok-Han that had appeared, but also because Willow revealed their strengths to all the potential slayers."

Buffy remained silent.

"Buffy, you shouldn't worry too much," he reassured her. "This is likely just an isolated group that has survived until now in hiding."

"Yes, you're probably right. Willow's still gonna do some research but we don't have any more books… Do you still have any in England?"

"There's a good amount left in the old Council… I'll see what I can do to get some back."

"Thank you very much, Giles. I'm sorry for waking you up for that…"

"Don't worry, Buffy. I'm always happy to hear from you."

"When are you coming to L.A.?" Buffy asked suddenly.

"I don't know yet. I'm trying to rebuild the Council while, of course, changing some rules. I'm also trying to organize some sort of office for the new slayers."

"Oh…"

"I'll come by as soon as possible, I promise."

"Thank you, Giles. Good night."

"Stay safe. Goodbye."

Buffy hung up. She missed Giles. He had always supported her when she felt a little lost. Of course, she had gone against his will about her mission sometimes, but she always felt more peaceful when she shared her anxieties with him.

She then went to Willow to tell her about her former watcher's analysis. After listening to her, the redhead nodded with conviction.

"Giles's right, it's probably nothing to worry about."

"Even so, we'll have to find this group of demons and kill them. They can wreak havoc among the city's inhabitants and I won't be surprised to hear about them on the news… I don't know how we could go about it," the Slayer mused aloud. "I mean, Los Angeles is way bigger than Sunnydale! You can't walk around town and expect to bump into them!"

Willow frowned. Her friend was right. Suddenly, her face lit up. "We just need to listen to the news and we'll know where they are!"

Buffy shook her head, "No, I'd rather get my hands on them before they actually hurt anyone."

Willow grimaced. She hadn't thought about that. "Maybe I could do a locator spell," she suggested. "I can't guarantee the result though! Given the meager description we have, it's gonna be difficult to spot them precisely…"

"It's better than nothing. And then, if that doesn't work, we'll find something else."

Willow nodded and stood up to perform her second locator spell of the day. Before starting though, she turned to Buffy. "I called Xander, he should be here soon."

"Great."

Buffy, Xander and Willow were heading towards a dark alley lined with gloomy buildings in one of the rundown neighborhoods of Los Angeles. Night had fallen and ghostly shadows were cast against the walls as they walked, making the place even more frightening. The humidity of the air made the atmosphere oppressive.

"I hate this place!" Xander suddenly said. "We can't see anything! Why don't they put lights on these streets when it feels like it's daytime in the city center?"

"It's because traffickers destroy street lights so they can do their business in peace," Willow replied naturally. "Every time an agent came to turn the power back on, he was attacked. So they don't come anymore."

'"Thank you, Will. I'm perfectly fine now." His friend grimaced and Willow smiled sympathetically. Thanks to her spell, the witch had spotted a mob of demons in the neighboring street. She hadn't been able to clearly establish whether these were the demons that had attacked Dawn and Andrew, but the Slayer had decided to take a look.

After a few minutes, Buffy paused and motioned to her friends to be quiet. She moved slowly along the wall until she reached the intersection of the adjacent street. She then ventured to take a look and what she saw made her blood run cold. A group of demons, at least twenty, were gathered in a circle at the end of the alley. They seemed to be deep in conversation.

The Slayer quickly turned towards her friends, worried.

"What's wrong, Buffy?" Willow whispered when she saw her friend's face.

"There are around twenty demons at the end of this street. I don't know what they're doing, it looks like they're… talking."

"They're talking?" Xander repeated, stunned.

"Either way, they don't attack anyone even though we are in the middle of buildings. It's really strange," the Slayer replied. She tried again to discreetly observe the group in order to glean some additional information about their presence but they had disappeared.

"There's no one left!" She exclaimed.

"What? What do you mean?" Willow asked.

"They disappeared," the Slayer repeated," Look!"

The three friends approached and noted the absence of any human or demonic life in front of them. Xander frowned. "Buffy, are you sure you saw something? Look, it's a dead end! They couldn't have gotten out without us seeing them or hearing something!"

The Slayer shook her head, confused. "I am… It was dark but I'm pretty sure…"

At that moment, Willow screamed. Buffy barely had time to turn when a powerful blow sent her crashing to the ground. A little dazed, she quickly got up and looked for the one to blame. It was a rather large demon with nothing special except a repulsive ugliness. Buffy took a stake out of her inside pocket and sighed. She could have brought something other than a vampire stake! She glanced at her two friends who were standing a little behind. She took a deep breath and kicked the demon. It took a few steps back and tried to catch the Slayer but she narrowly avoided it. As she looked for a way to push her opponent back, the demon threw her into the air and the Slayer felt her back crash against the walls of the alley. The demon rushed at her then but Willow cast a spell and it was immobilized for a few seconds. This gave Buffy time to stand up and, not knowing what else to do, drove her stake into one of the demon's eyes.

Its cry tore the silence of the night. The Slayer took the opportunity to throw a monumental punch and it sent the demon crashing several meters away. Willow rushed towards her then.

"Buffy, are you okay?" She asked nervously.

"Yeah, don't worry. I was just surprised, I'm out of practice with this stuff." Her friend winced as the Slayer approached the demon who hadn't recovered from her previous blow. She used her stake again to drive it into the demon's heart. It jumped and let its head fall back definitely.

Buffy huffed, standing up as her friends ran towards her.

"I don't know why but this brings back bad memories," Xander grimaced. "Demons are back while they were endangered! I feel like it's not good news…"

"Buffy, what do we do now?" Willow asked the one who was most effective in this type of situation but Buffy didn't answer. She didn't know and she realized she didn't want to know. Her mind was frozen.

"Buffy?" Her friend repeated. The Slayer noticed that her two friends were staring at her and that she needed to give them an answer. "Um, I don't know… Research?"

"Yeah, why not but… with what? We haven't had any books since Sunnydale was destroyed… Maybe the internet… Besides, I don't really see what we could be looking for…"

"Look, Will, I really don't know! Maybe this demon was the only one and I imagined the others. Giles told us not to worry. Yeah, it's probably nothing!" She said forcefully.

Willow's eyes widened. "I mean, Buffy, you're sure of what you saw and such a large number of demons in the same place cannot happen by chance! After everything we've been through, you're not gonna tell me that you still believe in coincidences!"

The Slayer sighed. Indeed, she hadn't been naive about this for a long time. Too long. "No, obviously… It's just… I just wanna believe a little longer that we're not gonna go through that again," she whispered.

"I know…" Her friend's response made the Slayer flinch. She found herself wanting to yell that no, she didn't know. Because it would still be up to her to take initiatives, responsibilities, decisions, and people would expect answers from her. She would be responsible for the deaths, she would be…

Buffy closed her eyes. She couldn't go through that again. She couldn't stand this pressure anymore. During the final battle, she had really started to doubt her abilities, but she had finally regained her momentum and she had known exactly what to do. She had noticed that over the course of the great battles she had fought, she had had more and more difficulty reviving this feeling. It had started during her fight against Glory when she had attacked Dawn. The Slayer thought she had simply fought too many battles. She was tired. Fortunately, she could probably ask the new slayers to take care of it… She hadn't felt like she was the chosen one for a long time. In her mind and in reality. Willow had developed the power of all the potential slayers. She no longer needed to be their guide.

"Buffy, are you okay?" Xander asked, suspicious.

"Yes, yes, don't worry. I'm gonna go home to begin research," she lied with a pang in her heart for her friends. She definitely needed to be alone.

"We're coming with you!" Her best friend naturally replied.

"No!" She exclaimed a little too fast and her friends stared at her, astonished. "I mean… it'd be safer to organize a patrol in case more demons show up," she explained.

"Well, you're usually better than us at that kind of thing," the young witch pointed out.

"Oh yeah… You're right. I'll go on patrol and you can do the research then."

"All right. We'll meet at your place."

"Okay."

Buffy wasted no time and she turned around before going around the corner.

"You ready?" Xander asked his friend who was thoughtfully watching the Slayer walk away. "Yes, yes," she replied. "Let's go…"

The Slayer strolled through the dark streets of Los Angeles. She had no specific goal. Unwillingly, she felt her patrol reflexes reappear with the force of habit, although they had actually never left her. She scanned the dark corners without realizing it, she was attentive to the slightest noise and moved silently.

She thought back to the events that had just unfolded. After dealing with this demon, she had immediately felt the need to be alone. During the conversation with her friends, she had used an excellent excuse to get away from them. Correction, she had literally run away, she remembered. She grimaced. She was sure Willow suspected something.

After several long minutes of wandering in the hot Los Angeles night, she wondered if it would be better to search somewhere else, maybe downtown. After all, that's where Dawn and Andrew had been attacked. But she didn't want to be in a place full of people, even strangers. She wasn't in a chatty mood. Anyway, if demons were still here, they would inevitably burst out of the city's backstreet alleys, she reassured herself.

Suddenly, she noticed something out of the corner of her eye. A figure dressed entirely in black had turned into the adjacent alley. Given the time and location, the figure immediately became suspicious. On her guard, the Slayer grabbed her stake covered in blood and followed it without a sound. The figure passed next to the only street lamp still lit and Buffy was able to take a closer look. Her eyes widened in surprise then.

"Spike?"

The figure turned around quickly. His face betrayed his astonishment when he recognized her and it seemed to Buffy that he was taking a few moments before finally answering her.

"Buffy." He didn't take a step to get closer and it was the Slayer who reduced the distance between them. "What are you doing here?" She simply asked.

"I'm taking a walk," he replied in the same tone.

"Ah… I didn't think I'd find you here," the Slayer pointed out, still in shock.

"I'm sure. I never told you about my walking preferences."

His tone was cold but Buffy didn't flinch. Angel hadn't lied, he definitely didn't want to see her. "Fine, I won't bother you any further then," she replied with more aggression than she intended.

Spike shook his head when he saw that she had taken his attempt at humor badly and he only hesitated for a second before deciding to undeceive her because she was already walking past him.

"Wait! I was joking…" Buffy turned her head towards him and stared, clearly having a hard time believing him. "I just… didn't expect to see you, that's all," he added.

The Slayer faced him again and crossed her arms, clearly showing that she was still not convinced.

"I'm glad to see you," he said softly, as if answering her silent question.

"Really?" She sounded sarcastic, "Well, it doesn't feel like it!"

The vampire shrugged his shoulders. "Of course I am! Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know," Buffy said, pretending to think. "Maybe because you haven't deigned to contact me since you came back?" She added triumphantly.

Spike rolled his eyes. "I knew you didn't seem surprised to see me. Did Angel tell you?"

"Don't change the subject," the Slayer cut him short.

"Well, since you wanna know, I didn't think you'd be interested!" He replied in the same tone.

Buffy opened her mouth but no sound came out and she frowned. She didn't expect this kind of response. She thought she had shown him enough that she cared about him the last time they had seen each other. Obviously, she had been wrong. She felt angry with him without knowing why. In the end, she stayed silent. If he wanted to force her to say how much she had missed him, he was going to be disappointed!

Noticing her confusion, Spike looked victorious. "See, I was right," he smirked.

Buffy shook herself. She wasn't going to let him believe he had won. "You don't know what you're talking about," she replied, annoyed. "Of course I'm interested to know that you're okay and above all, I'm interested to know how you came back from the dead!"

"Right, of course, that's what you're interested in…"

Buffy wasn't sure she understood what he was implying. She thought she detected a hint of disappointment in his voice but quickly concluded that he must be making fun of her, just like old times. She decided to play his game then.

"Obviously! Why else should I be interested?" The vampire didn't reply and Buffy continued, regaining control of the conversation. "Have you noticed that demonic activity has picked up a lot in recent days? You know something?"

Spike shook his head. "I don't." A rather heavy silence ensued.

"What about you? How are you?" He asked suddenly.

Buffy looked at him, surprised. This conversation didn't make any sense. "Um… It's okay. I live pretty close; I got a job in a high school… Dawn's going to college. It's a normal life, really."

"Except for the part where you patrol in the middle of the night with a stake in hand in the most sordid alleys of the city, right?" He sneered.

Buffy grimaced and preferred to change the subject. "What about you? Where do you live? Angel told me you left," she began.

"Ah! I knew he was the one who told you!" The vampire exclaimed.

"So what? What difference does it make?" The Slayer asked, annoyed.

"I told him not to! He doesn't know how to hold his tongue or something? It's not like he's talkative!" He growled, clearly annoyed in turn.

"Well, he must have thought I'd like to know what happened to the person who saved us all since he didn't bother to do so!" The Slayer snapped, definitely losing the little calm she had left.

Spike remained silent for a few seconds, a little surprised by her sudden outburst. "Was he right?" He finally asked her.

Buffy quickly thought about what she could say then took a deep breath. "Yes."

They observed each other in silence for a few moments. Buffy looked down, she felt stupid for getting angry and showing him how much he meant to her. Finally, she looked back at him. "I'm going home. Willow and Xander are waiting for me."

Spike also seemed to emerge from his thoughts. "Sure, okay. I'm gonna leave too."

Buffy was starting to head back to the main street when she heard the vampire's voice. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you myself; I had my reasons."

"It doesn't matter," the Slayer replied as she disappeared into the dark alley.

I think the title is starting to make sense! I love writing psychological and emotional stories.

I also tried to stay in character as much as possible. Tell me what you think!