A/N: Notes at the bottom.
Kuseno's laboratory was silent, save for the machines Kuseno was operating to repair Genos's broken arm. The young cyborg was unusually quiet during the process, which caused great concern for the old professor. He hadn't even explained who or what had damaged Genos in the first place.
"Well, your repairs are complete." Kuseno told him after he finished with the last few wires. Genos was silent as he moved his repaired arm around and flexed his hand. "Genos, is everything alright? You haven't spoken a word at all." Kuseno said with a worried frown. Genos still remained silent as he ran a self diagnostic on his system. "Please, Genos. Tell me who did this to you."
"...Master Saitama." Genos finally answered, stunning the professor.
"Your mentor did this?" he asked. "What happened? Did you have a sparring session that went too far?"
"No." Genos answered. "My master ripped my arm off because I was about to kill Vaccine Woman, a monster that has given up on destroying humanity."
"Ah, one of the monsters you say that Saitama converted to good." Kuseno said in understanding as he went over some schematics. "But why would you attack her in the first place?"
"I tried to kill her because I believed she was trying to corrupt Master Saitama." Genos answered. "She told me that she and Master Saitama engaged in sexual intercourse last night."
Kuseno nearly dropped his schematics when he heard that, having not expected Genos to blurt something like that out.
"And not only that, but all of the other monsters seem to have fallen for Master Saitama as well. I believe it will only be a matter of time before they wish to engage-
"I believe I get the picture, Genos!" Kuseno quickly said before wiping some sweat from his forehead. "However, I'm afraid I do not quite understand what you meant when you said you believed the monsters were 'corrupting' Saitama."
"For the last couple of weeks, I have noticed that many females have been wanting to be around Master Saitama more often." Genos began. "They would wish to take him out on dates or simply hang out with him in his home. Master Saitama is far too busy for such nonsense."
"Are you referring to his hero duties?" Kuseno asked.
"No. I am referring to the time Master Saitama is simply relaxing and doing nothing." Genos answered.
"I...see." Kuseno nodded.
"And during Master Saitama's trips to the store, Captain Mizuki insists on tagging along when I am clearly all the help Master Saitama needs." Genos continued. "She would even find holes in Master Saitama's orders to spend time with him when he would wish to be alone."
"Well, I supposed that would a reason to be upset." Kuseno agreed.
"And then there is Ki, who keeps insisting on making Master Saitama's food. That is my job as his disciple. And when he trains, he has recently been doing so with Captain Mizuki, the Beast Queen and the traitor, Kogane." Genos continued.
"Traitor?" Kuseno asked in confusion.
"Another monster wanted to know where Master Saitama lived and threatened her sisters if Kogane did not lead her to Master's home. By leading that monster to Master's home, she has betrayed Master Saitama!" Genos growled. "But when I tried to destroy her, Master Saitama stepped in and stopped me."
"I can understand being angry for telling a random monster where Saitama lives after all he has done, but I also understand that she did it to safe her family." Kuseno said in understanding of both sides.
"Even if that were the case, she still should not have ratted out Master Saitama. If she was as grateful to him as she claimed, she would've taken death instead. And that goes for all those filthy monsters that take up space at Master's home-"
"Genos!" Kuseno snapped, stopping the cyborg's angry rant. "Do you know what you are saying? Because it's far different from what you once said about these monsters weeks ago. What has brought on this sudden hostility?"
"They have been sticking to Master Saitama far more than they should and stealing my responsibilities." Genos answered. "Ki has been cooking more of Master Saitama's meals for him. Captain Mizuki keeps asking to come along with Master Saitama despite my presence being enough. And lately, everyone has been telling me to not use the vacuum cleaner to clean Master Saitama's home."
"Why would they not want you to use the vacuum cleaner?" Kuseno asked.
"The traitor, Kogane, was nearly eating by another monster. The method was similar to an object being sucked up by a vacuum cleaner." Genos answered.
"I see. A traumatic experience, no doubt." Kuseno nodded in understanding.
"Indeed. However, Master Saitama's home would take longer to clean should I use a simple broom." Genos stated before glaring at the floor. "First they take away my duties as Master's disciple. Then they wish to occupy most of Master Saitama's time. And now they want me to slow down in my cleaning. If this continues, Master Saitama will not have the time to properly train me. I must not let that happen. I must-" Genos ranted before stopping when he heard Kuseno laughing. "I do not find the situation funny, Dr. Kuseno."
"Forgive me, Genos. I was not laughing at you. I merely find it humorous that you haven't figured out the problem." the old professor chuckled.
"I know what the problem is, Doctor. Master Saitama's time is being monopolized by all those females. They are wishing to-"
"The problem isn't that Saitama is being surrounded by females, monster or otherwise. The problem is that, somewhere along the way, you've seen those who get close to Saitama as obstacles. All the time that Saitama is spending with others is less time for him to be your Master." Kuseno explained before approaching Genos. "You have let your obsession with finding the rogue cyborg cloud your mind. Just because you are his disciple does not mean that Saitama must teach you 24/7. He is his own person, just like you and me."
"But Doctor, without Master Saitama's guidance-"
"Genos, have you still not realized it yet? You say you wish for the others to leave Saitama alone, but you yourself wish to monopolize Saitama's time. Doesn't that sound just a little hypocritical?" Genos tried to think of something counter, but found his words stuck in his cybernetic throat. "Listen, Genos, life is not all about revenge. If you let it be your core, what will you have left when the rogue cyborg is destroyed?" Kuseno asked as he walked towards the door. "Saitama has his own life to live, and you must remember that you have one as well when we have stopped that cyborg. Think on it, Genos." he said before walking out, leaving Genos alone.
Midori found herself skidding across the dojo floor before stopping. She tried to get up, but flopped down in defeat. She laid there in silence before Silverfang walked over and stood above her with a frown.
"What's wrong, Midori? You've been unfocused all day." he said before looking over at Charanko, who looked stunned as he held his fist out in front of him. "And don't say it was a lucky punch, because that was one of Charanko's sloppier attacks."
"I...I'm just...ugh!" Midori grunted as she sat up. "There was an incident back in the Ghost Town this morning."
"Oh? What happened? Did someone else discover the little secret?" Bang asked.
"No. That crazy fanboy that Saitama calls a disciple tried to kill both Kogane and Vaccine Woman." Midori answered with a frown.
"He tried to kill them? It must've been serious if Genos would try to do something like that after all this time." Bang stated. "What did they do?"
"My sister, Kogane, was forced by another monster to lead them to Saitama's home. Said if she didn't, she'd tell that elephant monster's brother since he wants revenge." Midori answered while avoiding talking about the Monster Association. "Kogane felt horrible about it and apologized. Everyone was angry, but Genos was the worst. He started to chase her through the streets, trying to burn her to a crisp with his cannons before Saitama stepped in."
"Hmm. Quite strange for Genos to suddenly act this way." Bang said while messing with his moustache.
"That's not the worst of it. He started to say that he only tolerated us because of Saitama, and that we were corrupting Saitama. Bastard." Midori growled.
"What about Vaccine Woman? What did she do?" Charanko asked. Midori suddenly smiled and gave a low chuckle.
"They spent a night together...alone~" she answered, making Bang blink and Charanko's jaw drop.
"You mean he...with a monster?!" her fellow disciple asked in shock before looking at his chuckling master. "Master Bang, why are you laughing?!"
"I'm just surprised, Charanko. I hadn't realized how close Saitama truly was to any of them." Bang answered.
"I'm surprised he'd put his hands on a filthy mons-" Charanko began before he started to claw at the kombu wrapped around his throat.
"What was that, Charanko? You were asking for a rematch?" Midori asked with a strained smile, her voice carrying a tone of barely contained bloodlust.
"Ma...Master Bang! Help me!" Charanko rasped.
"Of course I'll let you two fight alone." Bang answered with a smile before exiting, completely ignoring the sounds of fighting and Charanko asking for mercy. "That young man never learns to hold his tongue."
Kogane and Super Mouse were taking a walk through the Ghost Town as they talked.
"So you and your sisters were originally one monster before splitting into four?" Super Mouse asked.
"Yeah. It wasn't pleasant, feeling your body split itself from the inside out." Kogane answered while hugging herself. "Now we try not to use fertilizer so much because it affects us physically."
"I wondered why you and your sisters all looked different physically." Super Mouse said while looking back up at the taller monster. "Any other side effects happen?"
"Only if we drink more fertilizer. Then our physical differences grow." Kogane answered.
"So you could become taller, huh?" Super Mouse inquired as he picked up a strand of Kogane's hair. "Is this edible?"
"Yes, but I wouldn't recommend it." Kogane answered as the hair strand slipped out of Super Mouse's hand. "Unless you want to be as tall as me."
"So eating your hair results in sudden growth? Does this apply to your sisters as well?" Super Mouse asked.
"Not sudden, but yes. And all but Ki's hair makes females grow. At least, that's what Ki said." Kogane answered. "You sure do ask a lot of questions."
"Old habit from my human self." Super Mouse answered. "Believe it or not, I was once a scientist."
"Get out of here!" Kogane said in surprise.
"No. It's true. Lab coat and PhD and everything else." Super Mouse admitted. "Even worked in a top-notch lab with other big shot scientists."
"Wow. Never would've guessed it from looking at you at first glance." said Kogane. "So, what did you do in the lab?"
"Eh...I'd rather not talk about it." Super Mouse answered while looking down at the ground.
"Bad memory?" Kogane asked.
"A little." Super Mouse said before shaking her head. "A-Anyway, what can you tell me about Saitama? Why does he allow monsters to live here instead of killing them on sight?"
"Well, he does usually kill monsters unless they wise up and realize that attacking humans is a death sentence, which makes up all the monsters living up here in the same apartments he lives in." Kogane answered. "He also likes hot pot, food sales and being a hero for a hobby."
"Sounds...average." Super Mouse said.
"Well he is, as he likes to call himself, a regular guy who's a hero for fun." Kogane chuckled.
"For fun? That's a new one." Super Mouse said while raising an eyebrow.
"I know. Still, if he took it more seriously, he might've wasted all of us by now with his crazy strength." Kogane said, shuddering at the thought.
"Speaking of his strength, how'd he get that strong?" the oversized mouse asked. "Some genetic modification? Or was he born that strong?"
"Neither. He trained." Kogane answered.
"What kind of training gives a single human that kind of strength?!" Super Mouse asked. Kogane then explained the details of Saitama's daily exercise routine.
"And he did it for three whole years." Kogane finished.
"...You must have kombu for brains if you think I'm gonna believe that." Super Mouse stated.
SMACK!
"GYEEP!" Super Mouse yelped, her hands covering her ass after a strand of Kogane's hair smacked it. "What was that for?!" she snapped.
"Mind watching your tongue?" Kogane asked with a smile, her hair rising and wiggling towards the smaller monster. "Otherwise, I may have to punish you further~"
Super Mouse trembled and blushed at the implications before swallowing the lump in her throat and releasing a nervous laugh.
"A-Anyway, what's, uh, what's life like living under the thumb of a hero?" Super Mouse quickly asked.
"We don't live under his thumb. He doesn't boss us around or make us do anything we don't want to. He simply gave us the rule to not kill humans anymore. In exchange, he lets us live." Kogane answered before smiling at the sky. "And honestly, we're all happy with that."
"You are? But why? Is it because he robbed you guys of your hatred for humanity?" Super Mouse asked, making Kogane laugh.
"That was just a lie Ki made on the spot." the tallest Kombu sister said before looking down at Super Mouse. "Tell me, before you saw Saitama, what were your thoughts on killing humans?"
"That it would be fun to kill them, to watch them die after putting my fist through their head or chests!" Super Mouse answered.
"Uh huh. That's around the same thing for all monsters." Kogane nodded before kneeling down and looking her in the eyes. "But how do you feel about that after meeting Saitama? To discover that someone out there could one day find you, no matter where you run or hide?"
Super Mouse's reaction was instantaneous. Her fur stood on end and was immediately coated in sweat, her body trembled uncontrollably, her breathing became ragged and shallow and her heart felt like it was pumping pure terror through her veins with each beat it made.
"I...I..." the mouse got out before crumbling to her knees, tears welling up in her eyes as she hugged herself. "I don't understand...I've seen the power of Dragon level monsters. Heard the rumors of the abilities of the Class-S heroes. But Saitama? After seeing him kill Vacuuma like that, looking so bored and unaffected by his encounter with him?" She held her head as the images flowed into her mind. "I can't do it! I can't face it! Not that man! Not that fist!"
She gasped when she felt a hand grip her shoulder and looked up at Kogane, who was simply looking down at her.
"That fear you feel deep inside? The terror from knowing what Saitama will do if you continue to try and kill humans? It's the same thing all of us felt after our encounter with Saitama." the taller monster explained.
"How do you live with it?" Super Mouse asked in a tiny voice.
"Simple. That fear acts as a massive suppressant on the monstrous feelings inside our hearts." Kogane answered, her other hand over her own heart. She smiled before continuing. "But because of that, we slowly began to feel other feelings. Feelings that we either lost or never had as monsters. Feelings of joy, sadness, love and so many others. And it's because of that that we all feel so grateful to Saitama."
Super Mouse's eyes slowly widened as images of a lab came to her mind, a young woman going around and working with such passion appearing all over. Her body stopped trembling and slowly pulled her arms away from her self-embrace before standing up.
"Feel better?" Kogane asked.
"A little. And...I think I understand what you meant." Super Mouse said before they continued walking. A moment into their walk, she looked up at Kogane. "When you said you could feel love, would that be for Saitama?" she asked, Kogane's only response was to smile at her.
"Hey! Heeeeey! Come on! Look at me!"
"Just ignore it and it'll go away." Saitama muttered.
"I heard that!" the little monster following him snapped. "Sheesh! Why are you acting so cold?"
"You're annoying me. I wanted to take a walk to be alone and clear my head." Saitama answered. "So go away and leave me be."
"Aww, come on. Don't be like that." she said with a smile as she jumped in front of him. "All I want to do was talk. Don't give me the cold shoulder, Mister Saitama." she said before giving a cute wink at him. Saitama merely stared at her before sighing in defeat.
"Fine. But keep any questions or answers to 20 words or less, okay you...what did you say your name was?" he asked.
"I'm the Little Splitter!" she proclaimed with a big smile. A smile that hid her true feelings quite well.
'I cannot believe I'm fucking doing this.' she thought in irritation, her mind going back to an hour ago.
-One hour ago, Monster Association-
Gyoro Gyoro had assembled a few monsters into his private chamber to discuss their mission. Before him stood Rhino Wrestler, Reptera, Sludge Jellyfish, Electric Catfish Man, Maiko Plasma, Great Food Tub, Black Sperm, Abysstalon, Manako and Super Mouse.
"Do you all understand?" Gyoro Gyoro asked.
"Yes. You want us to go up to the surface and talk to this hero called Saitama." said Electric Catfish Man.
"Indeed. Nyan went up there, but came back a cowering mess. So instead of brute force, I want to try a change of tactics and have some of you try to befriend this hero called Saitama." Gyoro Gyoro explained.
"Feh. Sounds like a waste of time." Rhino Wrestler scoffed.
"Only if you come back with nothing." Gyoro Gyoro countered. "Any questions before you go up there?"
"Yeah. Can we do this after breakfast?" Great Food Tub asked while rubbing her growling stomach. "I'm hungry." she whined.
"You're always hungry." Abysstalon snickered.
"You can eat after you return." Gyoro Gyoro told her, making her groan as they all turned to leave. "One more thing before you go." he said, stopping them all. "Black Sperm. I have a request of you."
"Oh yeah? What's that?" the small monster asked.
"For this mission, I don't need you." he said. "I need Little Splitter." the MA advisor said, making Black Sperm's eyes widen.
"You want me to what?!" Black Sperm yelled while the other monsters looked confused.
"It's only for a little while." Gyoro Gyoro assured him before looking up at the other monsters. "And if you're worried about anyone else here knowing your secret, you have my permission to kill them." Gyoro Gyoro said, making the other monsters nervous.
"Pardon me for asking, but what are you talking about?" Maiko Plasma asked. Black Sperm growled before sighing and turning to them all.
"He means this." Black Sperm said, his voice sound far less deep and more feminine. The other monsters watched as Black Sperm's body slowly shrank on itself until he turned into...
"Why do you look like a girl?" Sludge Jellyfish asked after he finished transforming into her new form. "Though I gotta say, you pull of looking like a girl really well." the sludge monster laughed.
SPLAT!
The others watched as the giant fist Black Sperm formed pulled itself and shrank back into her body, leaving Sludge Jellyfish a stain on the floor and walls before he reformed.
"I am a girl!" Black Sperm yelled with a frown.
"Say what now?" Reptera asked.
"Everyone, allow me to introduce you to Black Sperm's true form, Little Splitter." Gyoro Gyoro said while Little Splitter moved her antenna out of her face.
"B-But if you're a girl, then why do you act like you're a guy?" Manako stuttered
"None of your business." Little Splitter answered with a glare, scaring the little pink monster. As Manako hid behind Rhino Wrestler, Little Splitter pulled the end of her antenna off and chucked in the air, her antenna growing back just as fast as another her came out of the severed part. "A million of me should be enough for this." she said before assuming her male persona. "And not a word of my secret leaves this room. Got it?!" she snapped, her voice back to being deep.
The rest of them agreed, knowing that upsetting a monster of Threat Level Dragon was a death sentence.
"If that's all the questions, I bid you all farewell and good luck." Gyoro Gyoro said before the monsters all left the room.
-Present-
So now, here Little Splitter was, in her true form and following Saitama around.
'This had better be worth it. I hate acting this way.' she thought with a smile. "So, Mister Saitama, how high are you in the Hero Ranks?"
"Me? Um...Class-B, Rank-33 last I checked." Saitama answered.
"A Class-B Hero, huh? Does that mean you're pretty strong?" she asked.
"Yeah. I am." Saitama answered bluntly, his face not changing at all.
'Not much for boasting about your strength, huh?' the monster thought. "Think maybe you could be a challenge for me?"
"Are you strong?" Saitama asked.
"I sure am! I may not look it, but I'm probably on par with the Class-S heroes!" Splitter boasted.
"Really? That's cool." Saitama answered as he looked down at her before rubbing his chin in thought. "Hmm."
"What?" the monster asked.
"Just wondering how you'd do it. I've met some Class-S heroes before and they seem strong, so I was just wondering how a little monster like you would fight them." Saitama answered. Splitter stopped and stared before letting out a low chuckle. "What?" he asked Splitter.
"That's funny." she said with a smile. "The way you call me little. It almost sounds like...like you're looking down on me."
"Well, you are small, so I have to look down at you." he bluntly answered. Splitter's smile became twitchy as vein pulsed under her white face.
"One second, please!" she grit out before walking towards a nearby abandoned high rise building. Saitama watched her, wondering what she was doing. He watched as she approached the building's wall, tightened her tiny fist, pulled her arm back and threw a punch-
CRACK!
-that smashed the entire building before sending it toppling over and crumbling down into nothing but rubble. Saitama simply stared at it before seeing Little Splitter approach him.
"I'll only say this once." she said with a glare. "I do not like being looked down on."
"Okay." Saitama answered before he continued walking.
'Fucking bastard! You still looking down on me?!' she mentally roared before calming down. 'No, no. Don't attack him. Have to be friendly with the bald asshat. Just need to smile and put up with this crap for now.'
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"
Both hero and monster turned at the sound of someone screaming to see Manako running through the streets.
"SAVE MEEEEEE!" she screamed as a monstrous Great Food Tub chased after her.
"I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! I NEED TO EAT!" she roared as drool ran down her chin. Saitama sighed at this before he started walking towards her.
"Well, hope this one's strong." he said.
"I got it." Splitter spoke up as she ran towards the Great Food Tub. She jumped up towards it and, to Saitama's surprise, split into dozens of Little Splitters that latched onto the Great Food Tub. They then continued to split into even more copies before wrestling the Great Food Tub onto her back, the large quantity of Little Splitters keeping her from moving.
"RRAGH! LET ME GO! I'M STARVING! LET ME GO!" the Great Food Tub yelled as she tried to get free. A lone Splitter walked up to her head and looked her in the eye.
"Hungry?" the smaller monster asked before Great Food Tub's jaws were forced open by the other Splitters while the lone one pulled the tip of her antenna off, a new one regenerating in it's place. "Enjoy~" she sang as she dropped the ball into the larger monster's mouth before the other Splitters slammed her mouth close.
"THAT'S NOT GONNA BE ENOUGH FOR HER!" Manako yelled in a panic.
"Wait for it." one Splitter said as a gurgling sound suddenly came from the Great Food Tub's stomach. The monster in question looked down at herself before her stomach suddenly inflated like a balloon. The rest of the Splitter's jumped off and looked at the Great Food Tub just laid there, her body slowly morphing into her more humanoid form.
"Ahhhh~ That hit the spot." the pacified monster sighed in relief before belching. "Excuse me." she giggled before noticing the others. "...I did it again, didn't I?"
"Yes." all the Little Splitters answered before they merged into one.
"Huh. That was strange." Saitama stated, catching their attention. Little Splitter and GFT just looked at him while Manako started to tremble.
"Uh...w-who are you?" the little pink monster asked.
"I'm Saitama." he answered before looking at Little Splitter. "Friends of yours?"
"More like acquaintances." Splitter answered. "The glutton here is called the Great Food Tub, and the shivering wreck's called Manako."
"Uh, I, uh, that is, um, uh, uhhhh." Manako stuttered before Splitter's antenna turned into a hand and slapped her once. "HI! NICE TO MEET YOU! I'M A WEAKLING! PLEASEDON'TKILLME!"
"You're a what now?" Saitama asked while Splitter laughed.
"Don't mind Pinky here. She's just afraid because she's not very strong. A bottom-of-the-barrel Class-C hero could kill her with ease." Splitter explained, making Manako sigh in shame.
"It's true. All I'm good for is being a walking flashlight." said Manako.
"So, this is Saitama? He doesn't look like much." the Great Food Tub said after observing Saitama before her stomach started to violently move around. "OWOWOWOW!" she cried as she held her expanding stomach.
"It's rude to insult others based on appearances." Splitter warned. "Be nice, or the other mes that I fed you won't stop multiplying. Understand?"
"Yes! I'm sorry!" GFT cried out before her stomach stopped growing, all while Saitama just watched in growing confusing.
"Who exactly are you three anyway? Why are you here?" he asked.
"Us? We're just a few monsters looking for a place to hide from the rest of the world since society wants to kill us on the spot." Splitter answered. "Heard this place was huge and empty, so we thought we'd find a place to call home."
"Really?" Saitama asked before shrugging and walking away. "Alright. Just don't cause a ruckus. And if you attack anyone, I'll be coming for you."
"Hold on a second!" Splitter called out.
"What?" Saitama groaned as he looked at them.
"Mind if we come over? It'd be nice to know where our neighbor lives and all." said Splitter.
"I don't know. My home isn't big enough for her." Saitama answered while pointing at Great Food Tub.
"Don't mind me. I'm just gonna lie here and wait for my stomachache to go away." the gluttonous monster moaned.
"Alright. We'll come get you later." Splitter said before she and Manako followed after Saitama. As they did, the two monsters began to whisper amongst themselves.
"So this guy is Saitama? The hero that spooked Nyan?" Manako asked.
"Seems that way." Splitter answered. "Frankly, I don't see it. How could this guy terrify a monster on Nyan's level?"
"Maybe he's just like you?" Manako suggested.
"What?" Splitter asked with a glare, frightening the weaker monster.
"Y-Y-You know! That whole 'don't judge a cover by it's book' thing!...Wait, that was wrong. I mean-"
"I get what you mean." Splitter interrupted before looking back at Saitama. "But if that's the case, we need to be careful. This guy could be capable of anything."
"Hey."
Both monsters stiffened when Saitama looked over his shoulder at them. "How'd you make so many of yourself? Is that why you're called Splitter?"
"Uh, yes. Yes! That's right!" Splitter answered with a smile. "No matter how many times I'm sliced, diced, smacked or attacked, I'll just keep splitting into more!" she said as they kept on walking and talking.
Maiko Plasma and Electric Catfish Man were busy scouring their area for any signs of Saitama and the monsters that lived with him.
"You sure you don't know where they are?" EC Man asked.
"I told you, I don't. After he defeated Vacuuma, the other survivors and I snuck away and came back to headquarters." Maiko answered. "And even if I did know, I don't know if I'd have been able to tell anyone."
"You do know that withholding that kind of information will get you killed, right?" the fish monster reminded her.
"I know, but...the thought of what Saitama might do to me terrifies me more." she answered, her hands trembling in fear.
"Why? Because of what happened to Nyan?" he asked.
"No. I can't explain it, but just thinking about him makes me so scared that I can't stop shaking." she said.
"There's nothing to worry about. Sure, he scared Nyan, but she's only one monster of Threat Level Dragon. If all of the Cadres attack him, he'll have no chance of survival." Electric Catfish Man said with confidence.
"You're wrong."
Both of them perked up and looked to see Nori walking towards them, a frown on her face and her voice sounding down.
"It doesn't matter who it is, how strong they are or how many attack at once. Saitama won't lose to anyone." she continued.
"Hmm? Who are you?" Electric Catfish Man asked.
"She's Nori, one of the Kombu Sisters I told you about." Maiko answered before looking back at Nori. "What are you doing out here? Does Saitama live nearby?"
"No. I'm here because I couldn't be at the apartments right now. There was an...incident." Nori answered.
"What happened? That hero, Saitama, do something?" the male monster asked.
"No...Who are you?" Nori asked.
"This is Electric Catfish Man. He's my partner in the Monster Association." Maiko answered before taking his hand and smiling. "And more."
"Hehe. C'mon. Not in public." EC Man said with a smile and blush while scratching the top of his head with his free hand. The sight brought a small smile to Nori's face.
"And they say monsters can't feel love. Shows what they know." she said with a weak chuckle while the two monsters stopped acting all lovey-dovey.
"Since you know who we are, you probably have no intention of telling us where Saitama lives, right?" the EC Man asked.
"Depends. Will you try something dumb like everyone attacking him? Because I told you before that it won't work." Nori stated.
"That's up to our leader. We just need to know where he lives." Electric Catfish Man stated.
"If we don't, our lives our forfeit." Maiko stated. Nori looked at them before sighing.
"I can't tell you anyway. We already had one of us nearly killed because they blabbed and none of us are willing to repeat what happened today." Nori explained.
"What happened? Saitama get angry about your sister blabbing to Nyan? Because she won't say anything either." said Maiko.
"No. It wasn't Saitama. It was Genos." Nori answered. "He's the one who tried to kill Kogane."
"Is that why you're so down?" EC Man asked.
"No. It's more than that. Genos...that bastard!" she growled, her whole demeanor suddenly changing and her eyes gaining a dangerous look to them. "All this time, we thought he was our friend as well. But NO! He was just 'tolerating' our existence because of Saitama! That fucking overgrown wind-up toy said we're nothing but filthy monsters! That we should kill ourselves rather than spill anything about Saitama! Ohhhh, I just wanna take his rotten head and...and...RRRRAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHH!"
Electric Catfish Man burrowed underground before pulling Maiko Plasma in just as Nori's hair lashed out at everything in sight, destroying anything they touched. They stayed in the hole for a while before everything went silent. They looked at each other before slowly peeking their heads out of the hole, allowing them to see all the devastation surround Nori, who was know panting as she slumped to her knees.
"Was she like that when you met her?" EC Man whispered.
"No...this is new." Maiko answered as they got out of the hole and slowly approached her. "Um...Nori?" she spoke up. The Kombu monster was still panting as she looked at them, her eyes having gone back to normal.
"What happened?" she asked as she rubbed her head and looked around. "I blacked out for a moment there."
"You, uh, threw a...temper tantrum?" EC Man answered with a nervous smile.
"I did?" she said as she stood back up. "I can't remember."
"Maybe we don't mention Genos to her for the time being." Maiko whispered to her partner, who nodded his head.
"Still, we need to find Saitama." he whispered back before raising his voice. "Nori, was it?" he asked, gaining her attention. "We didn't come up here to start a fight, but we do need to find Saitama. If we don't, our boss will kill us." Nori stared at them before sighing.
"I'll have to ask the others first. If I don't, the others will be pissed if I bring someone in unannounced." she told them. "Mind waiting here?" The two of them looked at each other before nodding at her. "Alright. I'll be back." she said before walking away.
"That was easier than I thought." EC Man chuckled. "Should we follow her?"
"No. Best to play it safe." Maiko said before sitting down on a piece of rubble. "We'll wait." Her partner sighed and shrugged before sitting next to her. They may not have been getting anywhere, but at least they could spend some time out in the sun.
"Oh where, oh where's the hero, Saitama? Oh where, oh where could he be~" Abysstalon sang from atop Rhino Wrestler's shoulder.
"Shut up, already. And get off my shoulder!" the larger monster grumped as she shrugged her off, making her laugh as she landed on her feet. The two had been looking for Saitama or the other monsters for some time, but all they found were empty buildings and more empty buildings. "Hmph! I can't believe they're making us search this stupid Ghost Town for some random nobody hero. He's not even in Class-S!"
"That's what makes him a mystery. A hero lower than Class-S scaring a monster as powerful as Nyan isn't to be taken lightly." Abysstalon told her larger companion. "That's why they sent a bunch of us up here on the orders to try and befriend this Saitama guy so we could learn any weaknesses."
"Who cares? He's just another weak, low class hero! Probably used some kind of trick on Nyan to make her think he's stronger than he is." Rhino Wrestler grunted. "I said it before and I'll say it again. This is a complete waste of time."
"Maybe, but it's still an order. Besides, if we had objected, we'd have become meat cubes by now." Abysstalon reminded him. "Now keep your eyes peeled for him or those other monsters that listen to him. They could be anywhere and hello!" she suddenly said as she looked at a small garden.
"What's all this?" Rhino Wrestler asked as he looked at all the sprouting plants. "A garden? Out here?"
"Might belong to that Saitama guy." the smaller monster said as she looked at the plants. "If he's living out here, he must be homeless and is growing his own food."
"So he's a homeless hero who grows his own food out here in the middle of a Ghost Town." Rhino Wrestler summed up. "A perfectly good reason to be scared." he said in a mocking tone before punching a nearby car. "I could be training right now if not for this fucking crap!"
"Stop whining. Besides, if this is here, then he could be living nearby. I don't think he'd plant all this far from his house." Abysstalon theorized. "Let's narrow the search down to around this area and see if he lives close BYYYY!" she yelped when she felt herself being hoisted into the air by something grabbing her legs. She looked down to see Ki holding her up with her hair.
"And just who are you looking for, hmm?" she asked the smaller monster. Rhino Wrestler looked ready to charge, but stopped himself when a small blast erupted at his feet.
"I wouldn't move if I were you."
He looked to see Vaccine Woman pointing her finger at him like a gun, a small energy sphere forming at the tip.
"Unless you want me to blow your head off." Vaccine Woman finished.
"You think that'll be enough to stop me?" Rhino Wrestler challenged as he snorted steam out of his nose. "THEN TRY IT!" he yelled as he charged her. Vaccine Woman grinned as the sphere suddenly expanded to his size.
"RHINO! DODGE!" Abysstalon yelped. Rhino's eyes widened as he quickly jumped out of the way of the sphere as it skimmed the ground before launching upwards into the sky and detonating in the air.
"Darn. I missed." Vaccine Woman stated before aiming at Rhino Wrestler again, a multitude of spheres appearing around her. "Shall we try again?"
"NO NO NO! WE GIVE UP!" Abysstalon yelled in a panic while Rhino glared at Vaccine Woman, sweat coating his tough skin.
"That's what I thought. Now start talking. Who are you two, what are you doing here and are you friends with the monster called Nyan?" Vaccine Woman questioned.
"I'm Abysstalon. The big guy's Rhino Wrestler. We came here looking for Saitama. And yeah, we know Nyan." Abysstalon answered.
"Let me guess. You two are part of the Monster Association, correct?" Ki asked.
"What if we are?" Rhino Wrestler asked.
"Then you need to understand that you guys aren't exactly welcomed up here." Ki answered. "But before you go, you'll be answering some questions of ours."
"And if we think you're lying, we'll kill you on the spot." Vaccine Woman added before a shadow fell over her.
"SLUDGE PRESS!"
Ki looked to see Sludge Jellyfish slam onto Vaccine Woman, completely encompassing her in his body.
"Vaccine Woman!" Ki yelped in shock as she saw her friend try to get out.
"Ehehehe! Struggle all you want! You're not getting out of this unless I say you do!" Sludge Jellyfish laughed before looking at Ki. "You got two options! You tell us everything we want to know, or your friend here dies!"
Ki grit her teeth as Rhino Wrestler and Abysstalon smirked.
"Well, what's it gonna...be...?" Sludge Jellyfish asked before he looked at himself, his body looking like it was losing mass. "What the-?! What's happening...to...me...?!" he said as his liquid body drained away, leaving nothing but a withered husk in Vaccine Woman's hand.
"Vaccine Woman!" Ki smiled in relief. "You're okay!"
"And full." Vaccine Woman said as she patted her bloated stomach.
"What...did...you...do?" a barely alive Sludge Jellyfish asked, his body creaking as he tried to look at her.
"I absorbed the oils from your body." she answered before licking her lips. "It was a tasty snack, but it's time for the main course!"
Sludge Jellyfish let out a weak scream before Vaccine Woman's jaws extended and crunched his head like a piece of dried meat, the rest of him soon following until all that was left was the residue Vaccine Woman began licking off her fingers.
"That was delicious." she said before her stomach starting to shrink, giving her body a miniscule amount of growth, followed by a gut-rattling belch. "Excuse me." she giggled.
"S...She...She ate him!" Abysstalon stuttered out.
"Yeah. She's a glutton for pollutants." Ki chuckled before hoisting Abysstalon in front of her. "Now, about those answers we want." she said to the nervous goat girl.
"Well, here we are." Saitama said as he, Manako and Splitter arrived at the apartment building.
"This is where you live?" Splitter asked as they all walked up the stairs. "You have this whole building to yourself?"
"Nah. I live in just one room. My neighbors live in the other ones." Saitama answered as he arrived at his home.
"You mean the other monsters?" Manako asked.
"Yep. Come on in." he said as he opened the door and walked in, the two monsters quickly following.
"Kind of small, isn't it?" Manako asked.
"What?!" Splitter snapped.
"The room! The room is small!" Manako quickly clarified. Splitter glared as she made the 'I'm watching you' motion before looking at Saitama.
"She is right, though. This place is a little small." Splitter commented. "Ever think about finding a bigger apartment?"
"Nah. Too much hassle to move. Plus, I don't need a bunch of space I won't use." Saitama answered as he started making some tea.
"Anyone else live here?" Splitter asked.
"Just Genos, though he's not here at the moment." Saitama answered.
"Genos? As in the Class-S Hero?!" Manako yelped in panic.
"What's with you?" Saitama asked.
"She always acts like this when she thinks about encountering a Class-S hero. Can't really blame her. Any of them could waste her without even trying." Splitter commented. "So why do you live out here anyway?"
"Free rent, water and electricity. Plus, none of the monster around here are any match for me." Saitama answered.
"I bet that'll change once I move in." Splitter boasted.
"I don't know. I've been attacked by multiple monsters at once before." Saitama answered. Splitter glared at him before smirking.
"Well I bet you've never been attacked by a million monsters at once!" she countered.
"Nah. Never that many." he answered before a thought came to mind. "Wait. Are you saying that you can split into that many?"
"You wish? I got a shit ton more of me!" Splitter laughed.
"You've got more than a million of you inside you?" Saitama asked before looking at the tea he just served her. "Sorry for being rude, but I don't have enough tea for that many guests."
Both monsters just stared at him, then...
"Pffft! HAHAHAHA!"
Saitama and Manako both looked at Splitter as she fell over, laughing her little head off. Saitama looked at Manako, who shrugged at seeing her monstrous superior laughing like this.
"What's with you?" the hero asked.
"I'm-I'm sorry! It's...you...You were so serious about it, I couldn't help but laugh!" she explained through her breaths. She kept giggling before she finally calmed down. "Okay...I'm good." she said before smiling at Saitama. "I onlu need the one tea, thank you. You'd only have to worry about more of me if they're on the outside."
"How do you all fit in one body?" Saitama asked. Normally, he wouldn't care, but there were some monsters with abilities that would pique his interest.
"Sorry. Can't tell ya, but only because I don't quite understand how it works myself." she answered before sipping her tea. "So...when's Genos coming back?"
"Don't know. I kicked him out and told him not to come back until he's ready to apologize." Saitama answered.
"Apologize? What'd he do?" Manako asked.
"He tried to kill two of the others who live here and started insulting all the monsters here. Said he only tolerated them being here because I didn't mind as long as they didn't go out and try to kill humans." Saitama explained, making the two stare with wide eyes as he looked at the ceiling in thought. "Kind of weird, though. He looked like he was getting along with a few of them until recently."
"W-W-Why'd he try to k-k-k-kill them?!" Manako got out, her trembling hands one wrong twitch away from spilling her tea.
"Well, some random monster forced one of the monsters living here to bring them to my home. Genos was pissed about it." Saitama explained. "As for the other monster...well, that's for her to explain." he finished while looking away, his cheeks turning a faint red. A red that didn't go unnoticed by the two monsters.
"Ohh~ You and this monster women spend some quality time together?" Splitter asked with a sly grin. Saitama merely averted his eyes at the question. "...I was kidding. Holy crap! How far?" she pressed, with Saitama refusing to look at the little monster. Splitter grinned while Manako just stared, her eye so wide that it almost looked like it was about to fall out of her skull. "That far, huh?"
'Score!' Splitter thought. 'Got his home location and a little bonus info as well! Now I just gotta get out of-'
Knock knock!
"Saitama? Are you home?" came the Deep Sea Queen's voice.
"Uh oh! Who's that?!" Manako whispered.
"The Deep Sea Queen." Saitama answered as he went to the door to answer. He saw her there in nothing but a tight shirt and speedos. "Hey, Deep Sea Queen. Need something?"
"Just wanted to come over and talk if you're not too busy." she answered.
"I'm not. Come on in." he said. She smiled and squeezed in to see three tea cups on the table. "You have guests?"
"Yeah, but...where'd they go?" he asked while the Deep Sea Queen noticed the cabinet under the sink close.
"Hmm." she hummed before leaning down and opening it. "HA!" she yelled before looking at the darkness in confusion. "Huh? I thought for sure this thing closed." she said.
"Well, this has been fun, but we're gonna go! Bye!" Splitter said to Saitama from the doorway before leaving.
"Was that your guest?" Deep Sea Queen asked as she closed the cabinet and left the small kitchen area.
"Uh...I think she's gone." Manako's voice wheezed through the darkness. A moment later, the darkness started to shrink until Splitter's inflated rear was back to normal size.
"That was close." Splitter sighed while Manako, who was no longer squished against anything, started to breathe again. "Good thing I sent one of me away as a decoy."
"Why are we hiding anyway?" Manako whispered as the two tried to not make any noise.
"Because the Deep Sea Queen visited the Monster Association with another monster some time ago. If she sees us, she might start asking questions. Questions that could blow the lid on the Monster Association to Saitama. And if he's as terrifying as we've been hearing, he'll kill us before telling the Hero Association!" Splitter explained.
"You make a very good point." Manako said with a nervous smile before Splitter covered her mouth.
"Quiet! I can't hear them." Splitter ordered before they both tried to listen to the conversation. "Wish I could see what they were doing."
"I got it." Manako said before pressing her left horn, turning her X-ray light on and allowing them to see through the wall.
"What do you know? You are useful." Splitter chuckled before seeing it blink on and off. "Why is it doing that?"
"I have to blink." Manako told her as they saw Saitama serve the Deep Sea Queen some tea and kept quiet to hear them talk.
"Any word from Genos?" the Deep Sea Queen asked.
"No. Not since I told him to leave earlier. Heard anything from the others?" said Saitama.
"Uh uh. Not surprising that they'd want to be away from here after what Genos said." the Deep Sea Queen sighed. "I still can't believe he would say something like that."
"I know. I'd ask where it came from, but I think he'd just go on and on about it for 20 minutes." Saitama deadpanned.
"I'd heard from the Subterranean Queen about his tendency to talk. I thought she was just pulling my fins." said the Deep Sea Queen.
"Nah. Genos just keeps going until you yell at him to stop." Saitama confirmed.
'So Genos talks a lot? Not the most useful information, but at least it's something.' Splitter thought before she heard the Deep Sea Queen start to snicker.
"What's so funny?" Saitama asked.
"I just thought of some Hero names that would be perfect for Genos." the Deep Sea Queen answered with a grin. "The Chatterbox. The Motormouth. The Cyborg With No Off Switch."
The two monsters hiding had to bite their tongues to keep from laughing.
"Hehehe. Those actually do fit Genos." Saitama chuckled. "Let's hope my Hero name is good."
"With your strength, I believe you shall obtain a fitting Hero name. In fact, I can think of one name that would fit you perfectly." said the Deep Sea Queen.
"What's that?" Saitama asked.
"One Punch Man!"
The room was silent after her declaration.
"One Punch Man? Sounds a little simple, but it's better than what I thought up." Saitama admitted.
"Oh yeah? What'd you think of?" she asked.
"...The Caped Baldy."
Splitter could feel her near million selves howl with laughter inside her as she did her best not to laugh. Manako merely grinned as she heard the Deep Sea Queen howl with laughter as she fell over.
"THE CAPED BALDY?! THAT'S SO STUPID! WHO'D EVER BE DUMB ENOUGH TO NAME ANYONE THAT?!" she asked through her gales of laughter.
-Hero Association H.Q.-
"AACHOOO!" sneezed a majority of the executives.
"Bless you." said the rest of them.
-Ghost Town-
Splitter and Manako remained silent as Saitama and the Deep Sea Queen continued to talk. Nothing too big or worth mentioning, which served to irk Splitter.
'Come on, already. Get to something juicy!' she thought.
'Need more info. The more I have, the less chance of being killed by Gyoro Gyoro.' thought Manako.
"Hey...Saitama? Can I ask you a question?" the Deep Sea Queen asked, her voice sounding nervous.
"Huh? Sure. What is it?" he answered.
"Do you...see me as a woman?"
Manako and Splitter perked up at that as they continued to watch through the wall.
"Well, yeah. You are a woman, so of course I do." he answered.
'Dumbass.' Splitter mentally cursed with a smirk.
"That's not what I meant!" the Deep Sea Queen yelled as her face turned red.
"Huh? Then what are you talking about?" he asked.
"Well...You know how all of us feel about you, after Ki blurted it out this morning, right?" she asked, her face becoming redder as she continued. "How we all...love you?"
"Y-Yeah. I remember that. I also remember that none of you denied it." Saitama answered, his cheeks turning pink again.
'Wait a second! They all love him?! And how many is all anyway?!' Splitter thought in shock while Manako's jaw hit the floor.
"How could we deny how we feel for the man who gave us all a chance to be more than just monsters?" Deep Sea Queen asked, her expression one of calm sincerity. "Any other hero would've killed us without mercy. But you? You spared us our lives. Even when you learned that Vaccine Woman and I survived getting punched by you, you didn't finish us off when you learned. And even though, you showed us nothing but kindness."
'Ugh! Gag me.' Splitter thought as the Deep Sea Queen kept going.
"You let us stare here. You share your food with us. When we need an ear, you listen to us ramble." she continued with a smile. "I'd honestly be surprised if any of us hadn't fallen head-over-heels for you."
'I can feel so many of me wanting to barf.' Splitter thought while holding her stomach and rolling her eyes.
"Come on. You're exaggerating. She hates me and couldn't say two words without three insults coming out." Saitama denied.
"So? We all tried to kill you as well." the Deep Sea Queen countered before she took a deep breath. "I came over today because...I wanted to ask if you...maybe wanted to..."
"If you're trying to ask me out on a date, I'm gonna have to stop you." Saitama spoke up, making her stop and look at him. "I'm flattered and all, but I love Vaccine Woman. I don't want to lead you on or give you false hope, and I don't wish to cheat on her."
'...Ouch.' Manako thought as the Deep Sea Queen looked sad but nodded.
"I see...if you'll excuse me." she said as she got up and left, her face showing she was doing her best not to cry. Two seconds after the door shut behind her, Saitama flopped onto his back and sighed.
"That...was difficult. And worse, I gotta tell all the others the same thing." he said before running his hands down his face. "Fighting monsters and bad guys is easy. Telling so many girls that love you no? Oh man."
"We hit the jackpot with all this information." Splitter whispered with a smile.
"Yeah, but how do we get it back to the Monster Association?" Manako asked after her light went off.
"We'll just have to wait until we get a chance to run." Splitter answered before another knock came at the door.
"Saitama? It's Nori. Can I come in?"
"Come in." Saitama answered.
"Oh great. Who now?" Splitter muttered as Manako turned her X-Ray light back on.
"Whoa." Manako whispered as she looked at Nori, her eye moving in tandem with Nori's jiggling jugs.
"How is she walking upright with tits that huge?" Splitter quietly wondered as she watched them bounce from simple footsteps before Nori stopped next Saitama.
"Sorry to bother you, Saitama, but...I have a small favor to ask." Nori began.
The Great Food Tub was peacefully sleeping in the middle of the road, a smile on her face as a line of drool ran down her cheek. She started to stir when she felt something repeatedly poke her bloated stomach before waking up to the sight of a single Little Splitter using her gut as a trampoline.
"Rise 'n Shine, you bloated lizard!" Splitter laughed as she did a few flips while jumping.
"Black Sperm?" she muttered in a daze.
"It's Little Splitter, remember?" the smaller monster reminded her. "This is pretty fun!"
"Please stop bouncing on my stomach." GFT told her.
"Oh yeah?" she said as she stopped and stood on her belly. "Why should I?" she asked before she felt Great Food Tub's stomach bubble under her feet. "What in the-"
BUUUUURRRRRPPP!
The smaller monster laughed before holding her nose and fanning the air in front of her.
"Bleagh! What'd you eat?!" she asked. "Oh wait. Me."
"Yeah. And you jumping on me is giving me gas." Great Food Tub groaned as she sat up and glared at the little monster. "Now can you please get off of meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
The single Splitter raised an eyebrow at the Great Food Tub's sudden behavior, noting that she suddenly turned white as a ghost.
"The heck's your problem?" she asked. All the Great Food Tub could do was babble and frantically point behind Splitter. "I don't speak gibberish. Use words or I'll-"
THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP!
Splitter's eyes widened in horror as a loud sound filled the area.
"...Please tell me that's not who I think it is." Splitter begged.
A/N: A little thing to know. Black Sperm's name is the Little Splitter in this. Makes it easier to make her a girl. Super Mouse's origins, along with a few others, will be different from their canon counterparts. What they are will be seen later. That is all.