The next day came easily. The apartment felt cozier in the light of the sun.
Shinji enjoyed that sensation as he cooked. Never had living with another person made him feel complete. Misato and Pen-Pen filled a lot of his time, now that he didn't have to go to school and only had sync tests at NERV. Because of that, he made sure to wake up early to make them breakfast. Misato wasn't very picky, so he made her miso soup and tamagoyaki, just to get her day started.
He knew that Misato would be tired from yesterday's trek across the mall, so he made sure to add soy sauce to the tamagoyaki for good measure. She would need the energy for NERV later, he could tell from last night. After gobbling more beer, she sauntered back to her bed and instantly fell asleep. He wanted her to have a healthy meal once she woke up.
As Shinji was thinking this, he felt a peck on his leg.
"Hm?"
Of course, he hadn't forgotten Pen-Pen. The bird gazed up at his roommate expectantly, eager for his food. Shinji rolled his eyes.
"Here you go, Pen-Pen. You're not very patient are you?"
He reached into a small bag he had next to the soup. Pen-Pen's snacks, as it turned out, were fish-shaped biscuits made specifically for him. He threw one piece to the bird, who hopped to catch it in his beak. Shinji smirked.
"You better be ready,…"
Reaching into the bag again, Shinji felt the bundle of biscuits in his palm. He stared at them for a second, before grinning.
"… you're going to have to work for these!"
He threw them as high as he could, watching the biscuits scatter through the air. For such a small bird, Pen-Pen moved fast. In less than 10 seconds, his tiny feet managed to traverse the entire room, running and hopping from the floor to the table to the air to catch every single piece.
All of them.
By the time he was done, Pen-Pen raised his head toward Shinji with intent. He swallowed the biscuits down his throat, nodding as if challenging the upstart to continue. For his part, Shinji couldn't help but laugh as he waved his hands.
"Looks like you win again."
Pen-Pen growled at him. Shinji didn't really care. He was honestly in such a good mood, in a way he hadn't felt in… ever. If he had to pin point when this cheer started, he surmised playing the cello last night worked as a cleansing of the soul. Even though he practiced plenty of times with his old teacher, playing for Misato felt different. He wasn't just going through the motions, he was actively seeking her approval.
The part that threw Shinji off was that he got it! She praised his skill and rewarded him. He never received that from his teacher. He could only dream his mother smiling at his performance, but Misato did it in reality. He couldn't wait to spend more time with her.
Perhaps she would take him somewhere like yesterday? Or they'd stay in after she got out of work? Shinji wondered, just as he heard the door slide open. He smiled.
"Good morning Misato! I made you miso soup for-!"
Before he continued, Shinji was taken off guard by Misato's attire.
Far from the loose tank top and short jeans she usually wore, Misato confidently strode into the living room with a stark black military uniform and hat. It wasn't like her usual NERV uniform, Shinji could tell she was on a mission today. Misato applied the last of her lipstick to her face as Shinji stared at her in awe.
"M-Misato…"
Misato turned to him. She didn't smile, only giving him a polite nod.
"Sorry, Shinji. I can't have breakfast today." She explained. "I have to attend a conference and I need to take a flight."
Shinji looked down. "Oh."
He felt embarrassed. Shinji had been so used to routine he forgot Misato still had to do work for NERV. He tried to keep the disappointment from being obvious, but his face showed it for her to see.
"Okay. I guess I'll put the soup in the fridge…"
Stupid! Shinji cursed himself, he sounded so ungrateful to her. She had a job, she was going to busy helping to protect humanity, not like him who could only pilot Eva and-
He paused as he felt a hand touch his cheek. He felt his gaze turned upward, finding Misato's lips curved into a half smile.
"Hey, don't sweat it." Misato told him. "This won't take the whole day. We'll have the night to ourselves."
At that, Shinji managed a self-conscious smile. "Good luck with your trip."
"I will!" Misato rubbed her fingers over his cheek. "You be a good boy and hold down the fort, okay? I think we're missing food, so make sure to head to the supermarket later."
Shinji nodded, leaning into her touch. The two enjoyed a pleasant silence, feeling the air change between them. For a moment, Shinji closed his eyes, leaving him unaware of the odd stare Misato gave him. She tilted her head in thought.
'He's soft. He doesn't have wrinkles or scars on his body. He's clean.'
Not like me, Misato left unheard.
She caressed him for a few more seconds before pulling her hand away. Misato saw the way Shinji shuddered once he lost contact, and felt pity. He was so starved even such a small thing affected him. As such, she gave Shinji a quick hug just before she went.
"Make sure to feed Pen-Pen, Shinji! See ya!"
She opened the door and left in a huff. Pen-Pen continued to stare at his roommate, who had a goofy smile on his face despite himself.
"She's so amazing…"
Pen-Pen let out a whine. Shinji shrugged.
"I wasn't drooling over her, Pen-Pen. Mean."
He wrapped the miso soup in plastic and went back to his room. Without a sync test at NERV, there wasn't much for him to do anyway. He put on the earphones to listen to music.
"Hmhmhm…"
His hand touched something. Shinji grabbed it, pulling the object up to his face.
"?!"
He quickly threw it back to the floor. He was surprised to even find it in here.
"M-Misato's picture…"
Why did he still have it? Why leave that dirty thing out on the floor where Misato could have stumbled upon it? Sure, she didn't mind the first day, but now that they had been living together for a while it wasn't proper…
His eyes darted where the arrows pointed to. He didn't form a blush upon seeing those breasts.
"I've seen her wear looser stuff in the apartment." Shinji murmured. "This really isn't all that… revealing…"
thump
He adjusted his pants for a second.
It would be a waste to throw the picture away, Shinji decided. Instead, he hid the thing inside of his bag. It wasn't like anyone was going to look into it after all. He pulled out a laptop from that bag, opening it up to reveal a special web-page for him.
A condition for staying full time at Misato's apartment was his school work being continued virtually. As such, Dr Akagi set up an online course for him to follow that would cover the materials he would normally in school. He was only slightly disappointed the results pronounced him mediocre. Learning through a screen was hard and he frequently got distracted!
The course lasted all the way to the afternoon. Once it was over, Shinji left the apartment to walk by himself.
A week had passed, so it was time to get more groceries. Shinji tried to follow Misato's advice in not using the SDAT player to block people out. The results were interesting to him. He couldn't look people in the eye even if he wanted to, but the air tickling his skin felt good. Without the earphones, Shinji became more aware of his surroundings.
People moved past him without a care, lost in their own worlds. They were no different from him, Shinji realized.
"Look at this, Shinji. This is the city you protected."
He remembered Misato's words, and nodded along with them. These people counted on him, even if they didn't know it. Shinji felt an odd relief knowing that. He was needed, not as a tool for his Father, but in something beyond him. It made him feel good, he admitted.
Not too long after this thought, Shinji found himself at the supermarket. He walked in, only to find it nearly empty. The only ones immediately in his peripheral vision were the store clerk, who waved politely at him, and a couple of people watching the miniature TV on the ceiling.
"Look at that broad…" One of the customers talked to his buddy. "She's got a uniform, but she's eating a fucking pocky in the conference."
"That's NERV personnel. I've seen her around before."
"Do tell. You got her number?"
"Nah. She always hangs around with that kid. Bit of a creepy one."
Shinji blinked upon hearing it. "They saw Misato…?"
He looked up to the TV. Sure enough, Misato was on camera. In contrast to her serious demeanor earlier, she was clearly bored out of her skull. She was munching on that pocky as the smug man kept talking. Shinji couldn't keep a smirk off his face.
"Heh heh…"
He found only a few people were around the aisles. More convenient for him, he supposed. No one would get in the way.
Shinji bought the usual supplies. Rice, eggs, meat, vegetables. There was also instant ramen, which Shinji reluctantly took. They weren't healthy, definitely not what he preferred, but Misato liked them and he knew he could get tired after a long day at NERV.
He came back to the counter, ready to pay for the groceries.
"Nice to see you again, kid." The clerk said. "The usual?"
"The usual." Shinji nodded. "Here."
He handed the NERV card over to the clerk, who processed it. Shinji was ready to turn around and leave when he heard a customer gasp in horror.
"Hey wait a sec… what's going on with the Eva!?"
Suddenly, Shinji came to a stop. The customers continued talking amongst themselves.
"Christ, that thing's a monster!"
"Is that… Oh my god… what the hell are we supporting?!"
"Those things are supposed to have pilots right?! He must be off his fucking rocker or something!"
There was no way…
Shinji turned his head back to the TV to confirm what he was hearing.
Minutes before…
The flight to Old Tokyo took a couple of hours.
Misato wished she had that breakfast with Shinji. The food provided on the plane actively made her vomit into a bag. Ritsuko was kind enough to just leave it as a pat on the back and not say any more.
The conference was not nearly as kind to her.
Japan Heavy Chemical Industries had organized a televised demonstration for their latest project, one that supposedly would put NERV out of business. A kid's toy called the Jet Alone, a bipedal robot making its debut for the first time to a crowd of sycophants and overly eager analysts.
It was no secret to Misato that people hated NERV. She honestly couldn't blame them. NERV has the budget of entire countries behind its back, and the organization has an insane reach that most agencies would kill for. Just the fact she had been able to bully a tech company into giving up the Positron Rifle was proof enough NERV enjoyed an uncomfortable amount of leeway from the government. No fucking shit people were envious of NERV, those willing to take a stab at outdoing them or providing a cheaper alternative.
Misato understood them perfectly. She understood how fucking stupid they were.
NERV and the Evas were the only ones capable of defeating the Angels. Anything else is willful delusion or complete horse shit as far as she was concerned.
Shiro Tokita made his sales pitch on how the Jet Alone was so awesome, how it was so fucking cool and could totally take on the Angels and save trillions, how NERV was useless and couldn't think of something great, and blah blah blah blah. Misato didn't even bother listening as she chewed on her pocky.
"Question." Ritsuko raised her hand. "During the briefing we received earlier, this unit is equipped with a nuclear reactor, is that correct?"
"Yes," Tokita responded. "It's one of the Jet Alone's most distinguished features, allowing 150 days of operation without interruption."
Really, Misato felt bad for her friend. Ritsuko was the one holding the microphone. She had to speak for NERV, in front of a crowd just waiting to tear her apart for the slightest mistake NERV made. None of these people understand how precarious humanity's position truly was. Further reason to disassociate from the conversation.
"From a safety standard isn't that a dangerous thing to have in a machine designed for hand-to-hand combat with the enemy?"
"Better than a weapon that cannot operate for more than five minutes."
"The fact that it's remote controlled is another issue, in an emergency situation can you expect to rely on remotely controlling such a machine?"
"Our control system is more humane. It doesn't cause mental stress and instability on the operator."
"It's better to manually control a machine rather than trusting it all to a computer."
Misato wished she took Shinji's SDAT player. Pop music had more to say than this whiny twerp pretending to be a man.
"It's still safer than your system, which can allow such a dangerous weapon to go wild!"
Suddenly, the screen behind Tokita lit up. Pictures and security footage of Unit 01 played out, much to the audience's horror.
Everyone in the room got a chance to watch the Evangelion get blasted into a building by the Angel, only for its eyes to flash yellow. The Eva's jaw ripped open to reveal crimson teeth. It attacked the enemy with a ferocity only seen by predators in the wild, uncaring of the destruction left in its wake. Unit 01 tore the Angel apart in a frenzy, crushing its arms, ripping into its body so it sprayed blood all over the armor. The contrast with crimson and purple, along with the Evangelion almost seemed to cackle at the slaughter, brought the room to a halt.
The worst came once the Angel was down. Unit 01 didn't bang its fists against the core at first. No, the Eva savored its kill by crushed the bone bird masks that made up the Angel's face, then carved its hands into the body like a knife to a cadaver. By the time Unit 01 reached the core and crushed it, the Angel was rendered a bloodied mess on the streets.
There was not a soul in the room that wasn't terrified. None more than Misato and Ritsuko, who wondered how the footage got leaked in the first place.
'This footage is too good…' Ritsuko realized. 'The Committee is going to be pissed about this.'
"Why would anyone rely on a weapon that can fly off the handle like a hysterical woman?" Tokita laughed, shrugging his shoulders in an exaggerated manner. "I mean, didn't we learn that lesson from your mother, rest her soul?"
No one laughed. Either they were too stunned by what they saw, or the comment was too much in poor taste for them. Ritsuko figured if he just left it at hysterical woman that might have gotten some traction. She spotted a woman giving her sympathetic glance. She wished she could gouge that woman's eyes out, along with Tokita and his brainless ego.
"THIS is what is defending us currently." Tokita continued. "Monstrous beings that we only have the barest understanding. Why should we entrust the lives of our every day citizens to these things? Why, they might have the chance to destroy us long after the Angels perish. Leaving any of these around could spell the end of humanity as we know it. At least with the Jet Alone, we can control it remotely AND dismantle it whenever we want."
Ritsuko had to raise the obvious point before anything else.
"What are you going to do about the AT Field?"
"We know about it. We can take precautions. Really, it is better to trust the Jet Alone than this… abomination."
Things were getting heated. Misato stood up and grabbed Ritsuko's shoulder.
"We need to fall back." She told her. "We lost the PR war here. We should go."
Ritsuko didn't listen. She was angry. "That abomination killed three of the Angels! Our pilots are capable of discerning action on the fly, unlike your pathetic excuse for a toy that'd get torn apart by a VTOL squad in seconds!"
"Better that than an invincible demonic beast! Look at Naoko Akagi's daughter, just a pathetic selfish brat who can't accept the truth!"
Misato had to grab Ritsuko before she lunged at the man. Tokita was getting his media circus, painting NERV and its officers as incompetent destroyers at best. There was nothing to be gained here, Misato surmised. They needed to pack their things and go home…
"That's not even getting into the worst problem with the Evangelion!" Tokita grinned. "The pilots. Namely, the middle schoolers they found for this machine."
Her heart stopped. Misato had to gasp. "What?"
"Yes, we have pictures of the pilot they got for Unit 01 and OH BOY are they something…"
Tokita showed another batch of pictures, this time showing…
'Oh no…'
Shinji.
It was all Shinji. Pictures from his old school, his ID card, their walkabouts in Tokyo-3. They even managed to find footage of her and Shinji dancing at the mall. Such an intimate moment between them, and strangers were watching it unfold before their eyes. It was all Misato could do not to scream, as Tokita continued.
"Shinji Ikari, fourteen year old boy and son of Commander Ikari and the late Dr, Yui Ikari. He was plucked from his house at the country side to become an Eva pilot, with no training whatsoever! These are the abysmally low standards NERV operates on! This product of nepotism nearly destroyed the city in his first venture, clearly NERV is sending their best and brightest!"
Loud murmurs and shocked whispers came to the room. Even Ritsuko couldn't help but freeze in fear of what Tokita else might have uncovered.
"Honestly, he must be a turd of a child to cause such destruction! Where is he, Captain Katsuragi? Is the Third Child hiding in his room like a little coward?"
Misato was not frozen though.
No, at the moment all she could see was red.
She balled her hands into fists, thoroughly enraged at the violation Tokita committed against her and Shinji.
Swelling in fury, Misato ripped the microphone from Ritsuko and brought it to her lips.
"LISTEN HERE YOU WORTHLESS SACK OF SHIT! SHINJI IKARI IS THE ONLY REASON ANY OF US ARE STILL ALIVE!"
Her voice was the only thing that cut through his numbness.
For a moment, it didn't matter if he was being stared at by everyone in the store, or that he felt utterly powerless when his name and face were shared to the entire world. Anyone who knew him would know he was no savior or protector, and now everyone knew the truth.
Shinji didn't care. He was too transfixed on the image of Misato, standing up for him in front of everyone else. His jaw dropped at the venom in her voice as she continued her verbal assault on the man.
"You're a scumbag who's throwing trillions of dollars to a nuclear waste dump that'll get EVERYONE killed… everyone except for the fucking Angel! Your toy isn't capable of penetrating an AT Field, you have no precautions, you're deluded and stupid. Even with the shitty circumstances we forced him into, Shinji managed to kill three on his own! Three! Fuck you and your worthless prototype! I won't have you slander an actual hero for your stupid ego-trip!"
Shinji's heart skipped a couple of beats. Those weren't the words of someone using him just for the Eva, they were loud, passionate and hateful. They were true. He didn't deserve such words absolving him, he never did, but Misato was all the better in his eyes for defending him like so. How could he have expected anything less?
'She… there was so much I have to do to repay her. I don't think I ever can.'
His thoughts were swirling. Misato was the real hero as far as he was concerned. She was a protector, his guardian. Not his mother, but the closest he's ever had. Everything from the Third Angel to now proved it more than ever.
Just then, Shinji snapped out of his trance. He finally noticed a group forming around him. They were itching to get a chance to see the Third Child of NERV, right before their very eyes.
"Hey is that the Third Child?"
"He's so… young!"
"What's he doing here?"
"Just buying shit."
"Is he gonna kill us?"
"I hope to God not! Keep him away!"
They stared at him in fear. Shinji couldn't blame them. After what he saw on the TV, he would be scared too. He was right now, actually. He turned back to the clerk.
"I need to go-"
"Save it, kid." The clerk nodded in understanding. "Don't worry about paying. Run like hell and don't look back."
Shinji didn't understand what he meant until he felt his arm grabbed by a man.
"Such a scrawny kid, what is NERV thinking?"
Fear. Pain. Shinji yanked his arm free from the man and ran out of the store. He heard people yelling or gasping in shock. He ignored them. He had to move, he had to get away, he had to-
He ran down the street. The people became less real to him, more shapeless blobs that extended all the way to the sky, mocking him, laughing at him, pointing and jeering.
MONSTER!
COWARD!
WEAKLING!
PSYCHO!
MURDERER!
SELFISH!
The words rang in his ear. Even though they weren't said, he heard them. They were his every dark thought about himself made manifest. He passed by a window stacked with tv screens, all showing his face. More and more people knew who he was. By the end of today, he'd be recognized by any random person the street.
To avoid them, he ran down a corner.
He was violently tossed to the floor. Shinji barely had a chance to catch his breath before he saw a knife across his face.
"Hey, it's that brat from the TV! Ikari, right?"
A man with long hair grinned. By all accounts, he looked utterly ordinary. His friends were the same in that regard. They could pass off as anyone else, so it was easy for them to sneak up on any unsuspecting person.
Like Shinji right now.
"Maybe we can hold the kid for ransom." One of the gang said. "His daddy oughta pay extra high for him."
Shinji didn't have the chance to correct him. He was too busy hyperventilating as the gang surrounded him, all grinning in anticipation over what they were going to do to the boy.
"I'm really hopin' the old man doesn't pay," another one said. "I wanna carve my name into his scrawny neck."
"D-Don't!" Shinji raised his hands up. "He doesn't care! I hate him! Let me go!"
"Hahaha, look at him! He's gonna cry!"
Shinji didn't disabuse them of their notion. He sobbed in front of these people, too afraid to keep any sense of dignity. He didn't want to die. He hated himself, but he didn't want to die. He begged for someone, anyone to help him. Misato was a whole city away.
He looked around to see if anyone was watching.
They were.
No one helped him.
No one was coming to save him. No one-
A gun shot.
It rang in Shinji's ears as he saw the gang scatter. He wondered why they did for a second, and only a second. His answer came when another group of men appeared.
"Sh… Ikari…"
The ringing in Shinji's ears stopped. He asked:
"Who…?"
"Section 2." A man in a black business suit said. "We're sorry for not stepping in sooner, Ikari. The news hit us faster than expected. Come with us."
Shinji gave them a nod.
The Section-2 team picked him up from the floor and took him to a security car. Shinji said nothing. Not while he walked, not when he entered the vehicle, not when he sat down with the rest of his security detail. They drove down the street and all Shinji could do was curl up into a ball before them.
"Sir, we managed to secure the Third Child," a Section-2 agent in the front spoke into his cellphone. "We're bringing him back to Katsuragi's apartment."
Shinji missed her. He wanted to see her now, not these people. He gave nothing of himself to them, not even a single tear. Such a thing wasn't for them.
He felt something jab his leg. He saw one of the Section 2 agents offered a chocolate bar.
"We're thankful we reached you." He told Shinji. "Maybe this might help you feel better. It does for me."
Shinji took the bar. He gave a passive nod to the man in thanks.
"We didn't expect our rivals to pull something like this off. We're sorry."
What was there to say? Shinji didn't believe the man understood the sheer gravity of what had been done to him. He was a circus act for the entire country at best.
His life was over.
"Hold on sir… yes…"
The agent on the steering wheel turned his back to face Shinji.
"JET ALONE CRISIS AVERTED! CEO OF JAPAN HEAVY CHEMICAL INDUSTRIES ARRESTED!"
Written by Johji Futagami
Yesterday, Japan nearly faced another nuclear holocaust when Japan Heavy Chemical Industries' Jet Alone project went out of control along the seaboard. The Jet Alone had experienced a critical reactor meltdown that fried the radio command circuitry meant to disable it. The danger was only compounded when the founder of the company, Shiro Tokita, made NERV personnel pass through layers of security for a delete code that would end the Jet Alone's programming. Numerous lives were threatened by this incompetence.
[A picture of an annoyed Misato Katsuragi and Ritsuko Akagi waited for Tokita to call someone.]
The Jet Alone was only stopped by NERV's Evangelion Unit 01, revealed to have been piloted by fourteen year old Shinji Ikari, with assistance Captain Misato Katsuragi. Captain Katsuragi bravely infiltrated the robot to activate the delete code, nearly dying in the process. Her noble efforts prevented a greater catastrophe from obliterating Tokyo-3.
[Two pictures, a far away shot of Unit 01 holding Misato in its palm. The other was of Misato herself, being taken to a hospital still in a radiation suit.]
In light of the near disaster, authorities investigated Shiro Tokita and charged him with allegations of criminal negligence, leaking government secrets, stalking a minor, and tampering with the Jet Alone to make it attack Tokyo-3.
[A picture of an injured Tokita resisting arrest, practically foaming at the mouth and screaming.]
He blamed NERV for all wrong doing.
As of now, Shinji Ikari as well as Commander Gendo Ikari have remained unavailable for questioning.
Misato woke up from her slumber.
She was no longer surrounded by red lights or metal walls, nor did she hear the hiss of the cooling rods failing to abort. No, she was resting safely in a hospital bed. She stared up at the white ceiling ahead of her, and voiced her single thought.
"I hate this fucking ceiling."
It reminded her of the days she spent catatonic, surrounded by doctors and nurses who spoke over her. She never wanted to be in that situation if she could avoid it. Sadly for Misato, the Jet Alone forced her hand. The last thing she remembered was the rods going back to normal on their own, even though the delete code didn't work.
Upon processing this information, one thing was made clear. The Jet Alone was set up.
'The machine just happens to malfunction on the day we were here, then like a perfect miracle it stops as it goes critical. Something is wrong here.'
By who is her question. NERV has numerous competitors itching to sabotage it for any reason. Most of them fall to the wayside due to a lack of suitable funds and hardware to make alternatives that worked. The Jet Alone was the closest to working, and Tokita had the PR advantage with the leaked NERV information.
How did they even get them anyway?! Utterly ludicrous that it happened at all. Misato needed to talk to the Commander about this right away and get it cleared up.
Assuming they told her the truth.
Misato didn't want think about it too hard. NERV had secrets just like any other military operation. She didn't always know what the higher ups were thinking. To think they played a hand in the sabotage was inconceivable. That was never going to beat an Angel, what did NERV stand to gain from sabotaging it?
Yet, the thought didn't leave her, even as Misato turned her head to see the only other occupant in the room.
Shinji. Small, tiny, soft Shinji laid his head on the bed's side-railing. He was in the clothes she saw him wear in the morning, and she had been out for at least a day. It meant he had stayed by her side the entire time she was asleep. Her heart skipped a beat upon realizing it, her thoughts swirling in a confused daze.
'He was here… nothing happened to him.' She was happy to see the Jet Alone did nothing to her boy. Her eyes widened. 'Oh God… that bastard…'
Tokita revealed everything. Her Shinji's life was never going to be the same again.
Misato would have to confront this truth sooner than she expected, as Shinji began to stir from sleep. He rubbed his eyes, dark circles having formed around them since the last time she saw him, trying to wake himself up. She couldn't help but notice the stains that ran down his cheeks. He must have been crying.
"Hmmmrrrr…" Shinji groaned. Once his vision cleared, he saw Misato was awake. "M-Misato?"
Misato felt her heart twist even as she smiled. "Hey Shinji. Miss me?"
Just then, Shinji began to cry. He threw himself toward Misato, catching her off guard with a hug.
"MISATO!"
He cried out for her, burying his face into her chest in an attempt to keep her close to him. Misato allowed it, even throwing her arms around the boy in return. She felt a surge of warmth around her body, as her face blushed.
"I'm so happy… I thought you died… I am so happy…"
Misato saw the boy raise his head, his eyes stained with ugly tears. She wanted more than anything to make them go away.
"I'm okay, kiddo…" She lowered her head to his ear, and whispered. "I'm okay… you haven't lost me…"
He sniffed. "I'm so glad, Misato… If you died, I don't know what I'd do…"
"Same here." Misato stuck her tongue out. "I'm too young to die. You were brave out there by the way. You did amazing carrying me to that stupid mech."
With Shinji by her side, she pushed aside all her doubts. He needed her, and if she were honest, she needed him. Getting revenge on the Angels was her reason to join NERV, but with Shinji in her life she felt like she had a greater reason for living. Shinji was to be her anchor in the growing insanity that was her life.
It didn't hurt he felt so good between her arms. Her Shinji buried his face into her chest again, his quick, ragged breaths causing her blush to grow. She tried to ignore how hot they felt, how his fragile body sent a shiver through her fingers.
"I… I saw you…"
"Hm?"
"On the TV… you and that man…" His voice was demanding, "You really meant all that?"
"… Yes. Completely." Misato sighed. "We made your life hell, but you make me proud every day."
She felt his lips curl. "Thank you…"
He lifted himself from her finally, trying to wipe his tears with his hands. They kept coming no matter how hard he tried to keep them down. Misato lifted her hands to his cheeks and smoothly wiped the teardrops from his eyes.
"There, there. It's going to be okay."
Shinji only grew more panicked.
"No! No it won't be! They know! They tried to take me in the streets… had a knife... I was so scared… I knew you were busy and… I was worried I'd never see you again…"
She pulled him back to her and refused to let go.
Misato wanted to curse whatever God was out there. Her Shinji already didn't go to school. Now, he can't walk on the pavement without getting harassed by some scumbag. They couldn't stay at the apartment anymore, not with things being how they were.
"… I'm so sorry, Shinji…"
He didn't say anything. He just held her as he cried into her shoulders. Misato grimly realized two things.
She loved this boy with all her heart.
She was also going to be his only means of support for the duration of the war.
A dark part of her resented it. She was already aging faster than she wanted, now Shinji was going to depend on her even more.
Like a son to his mother.
Misato didn't want to be a mother so soon, not in the brief amount of time she had left before she would be discarded forever. Her mother failed her, her father was dead as he should be for what he had done. How could she do better than them? Why must she be deprived of the bodily comfort she wanted because of her boy's bad luck? A mother was just another good girl that no one paid attention to.
However, even as she said them in her head Misato buried the vile thoughts deep within. Any concern was greatly overshadowed by one fact:
'My Shinji wants me. He won't survive without me.'
Misato gingerly kissed Shinji's forehead, clutching him close.
Even with how little experience she had, she would do her best to take care of him. To shower her Shinji with the love deprived from him by the world all too soon. He would need it to face the Angels and the harsh reality that came with being a pilot. She failed if she couldn't accomplish that.
Throughout her promise, Misato failed to realize she had begun referring to Shinji as hers.
Ritsuko stood in the Commander's office.
He and Iscariot had waited on her report for days. They were so impatient, they even kept Rei around to watch. Rei kept her red eyes trained on Ritsuko's movements, curious to see what the doctor would do.
For her part, Ritsuko ignored the instinct to strangle Rei to deliver the unofficial report.
"The Jet Alone was successfully sabotaged. No one suspects a thing about our involvement, too busy with the media circus Tokida had created."
Gendo nodded. "If only it was more convenient for us. Do we have anything on who leaked the information?"
"Negative. We still have no leads on the perpetrator or their whereabouts. As of now, we can confirm Asuka and Rei hadn't had their info leaked to the public."
If all the grisly details about their involvement came out, NERV would be done for. The Committee would have had their heads assuming they somehow keep their existence a secret.
"The frame-up job on Tokita is peculiar." Mary Iscariot spoke. "Who's idea was that?"
"Mine." Gendo admitted to it. "A moron like him needed punishment. Shinji's name is everywhere now. This is problematic for a number of reasons. They put a target on his back, and by extension all of us."
He kept his tone cool, but Ritsuko could tell he was burning on the inside. A part of her believed he was offended on his son's behalf, with this being the best he could do to avenge the destruction done to his personal life. A larger part of her chose to ignore this.
"Be thankful." Iscariot chimed in. "The Committee doesn't hold anything about this against you for once. Something's been interfering with our servers for a long time. I don't like this at all."
"Me neither." Gendo said. "We are moving the pilots to the base for the foreseeable future. The Second Child is to be brought in immediately. Katsuragi and Ikari will meet her and her guardian."
"Sir." Ritsuko pointed out. "There is bad blood between the Captain and the Second Child. Are you sure this is a good idea?"
He shook his head.
"Soryu will have to handle it like an adult. We made her into one a long time ago."
The future was set, and Ritsuko only felt a sense of doom over the horizon.
Author's Notes:
Spot the RahXephon reference! Probably the best MisaShin fanfic ever written.
Apparently, the production notes on the Jet Alone episode label it was the end of the introduction arc. I guess this chapter feels pretty similar, thanks to the sizable change made to the canon.
Two thoughts I had, some things about Evangelion fanfiction I wanted to get off my chest:
1. I'm not against Shinji being written as more of a good guy, even Anno wound up doing that in the Rebuilds. But I can't say I like the trend in fanfiction where Shinji gets thrown pity parties over his situation only for the writers to bash the other characters- particularly Asuka- for their faults. Like, all the Eva characters are flawed people with their own demons to wrestle, Shinji is no exception. Or did you all miss End of Eva where he jacked off to a comatose Asuka and tried to kill her twice for rejecting him? If you wanna make Shinji a good guy, JUST WRITE HIM AS A GOOD GUY. You don't have to tear everyone else down for your dumbass fic. Kingdom Hidden in the Clouds and its author particularly pissed me off in that regard.
2. I've seen enough fics portray Misato as someone who's a sex addict or at least as someone who sex with a ton og guys. Not saying it couldn't have happened, but tbh I don't really feel like Misato was all that promiscuous in canon? She thinks of herself as dirty, but as far as we see in the actual show she only ever seemed to have slept with Kaji. Misato honestly came across to me as someone who absorbed a lot of shitty beliefs about herself which wound up hurting her and others in the long run (her pass at Shinji in Ep 23 being the biggest example). I wanted to keep that in mind for this fic.
Reviews:
QUICKM33MZ2005: It's less that Shinji believes Rei is a clone, more that she's a test tube baby with his mom's DNA. He doesn't fully buy that Yui went through with it, but he also doesn't want to rock the boat any more than he already did. Don't worry, even with this chapter's events you will see a dance rematch between Shinji and Misato later on.
engel17white: It's going to be a Soryu, taking aspects from the manga. As for a kiss, well, I think that might be coming up faster than you're expecting. ;)