Beauty of the Dark Chapter 17 - Sing, a vampire diaries fanfic

A/N: Here is Chapter 17! I have to say that the responses I've been getting to this really blow me away and put such a smile on my face. Thank you to everyone who has chosen to read this story, and to those who have shared kind words with me. Thank you to KimmyWSmith for proofreading yet another Chapter for me and always sending me incredibly nice messages about my story.

I'm going to be out of the country until August, but I'll be updating as I can. Don't fret if I don't update as soon as usual- I'm very much excited to continue this story and will be doing so, I'll just be traveling. Feel free to leave me a note if you really miss me! XO, Eden.

Song: Sing

Artist: Sounds Under Radio

I want you to know

it's not your fault

what I've become

is all I own

I live inside

my own machine

but these clocks that keep me

will always

sing

sing to me

when you can't breathe

when you can't sleep

when you're feeling alone

and the words aren't right

just sing, sing to me

Elena's words immediately set me into a panic. Stefan's gone. Stefan's gone. This was my nightmare come true, only Damon couldn't compel this away. This was real.

"Stefan's gone?" I repeated. "What do you mean he's gone?"

"I mean I went down to check on him, and he wasn't there. He left his daylight ring behind." Elena closed her fist around the ring.

"Oh my god." I whispered. "How did he get out?"

"I may have . . . left the door open the last time I was down there." Elena hung her head. "I told him I trusted him, and that I was ready to talk more when he was."

"You WHAT?" I shouted in disbelief. "Elena, why would you do that? How did you think that was going to go? Did you think Stefan was just going to come upstairs and join us for pizza, and I'd be okay with it?"

My vision went spotty with dizziness. My heart was racing so fast that I was sure that Damon could hear it. He squeezed my shoulder tightly, so tightly that I probably would have yelled at him under any other circumstances.

"It's okay. It'll be okay." He tried to calm me. "I'm here, he can't hurt you."

I leaned into him, forcing myself to take a deep breath and try to slow my heart rate. He was right. I knew I was safe with Damon here. This wasn't bad, or as bad as it could be, yet.

"It's not okay." Elena snapped. "He doesn't have his ring! What if the sun comes up? He'll die. Damon, we have to find him. Oh my god."

"Okay, okay. We will, Elena." Damon closed his eyes, no doubt trying to block out the two panicked girls in his presence. "Just let me think for a moment. You said he was feeling guilt about transitioning . . . he must have gone to the quarry. Just to really dwell in the memory of it all, let himself feel the guilt."

Elena nodded. "Right. I'll go find him."

"Not so fast." Damon shot over to her before I even realized his arm wasn't around me anymore. "You have no idea what his mental state is like right now. It's not safe for you to go alone, and I do not want to deal with the Stefan guilt if he hurts you. We're all going."

"We?" I squeaked. "Do I have to go?"

Damon looked at me. "Would you really rather wait here and see if he comes back if I'm wrong? Didn't think so."

Damon grabbed my arm and pulled me after Elena, who I'm pretty sure wished she had vampire speed right now. We were halfway through the parlor when I realized I was still in the t-shirt and sweatpants that I had slept in.

"WAIT." I called out. "I need real clothes. It's probably cold outside."

"Are you KIDDING me?" Elena growled, but went over to the bag she had left on the sofa. "Shirt. Pants. Shoes. Change. Now."

"Damon, turn around." I instructed.

"Really?" He rolled his eyes, but obeyed when he saw the daggers that Elena was shooting at him through her eyes.

I quickly pulled on the sweatshirt, leggings, and shoes that Elena had thrown at me. At least I wouldn't freeze to death now, though there was no guarantee that I wasn't walking into a death trap anyways.

"Ok let's go." I said.

Damon drove, as he was the only who actually knew where he was going. I was already terrified as it was, and his driving didn't help at all. I guess when you know you can't die in a car crash, and that you can compel yourself out of any speeding ticket; you can just drive like the road is a NASCAR track. It would have been nice of him to be a bit more considerate of the humans in the car, though I suppose Elena would have his head if he didn't get her to Stefan fast enough.

I balled the sleeves of the sweatshirt Elena had lent me up into my fists as I bounced my leg up and down. What were we about to find? Elena said that once Stefan had human blood, it was all he could think about. What if he killed someone? Or worse, what if he killed multiple someones? What if we got there and found Stefan just surrounded by lifeless victims? Damon reached over the console to stop my leg from bouncing.

"It'll be okay." He reassured me.

"Both hands on the wheel, please." I pushed his arm away from me. "Your driving is scary enough as it is."

"Is this really the time for jokes?" Elena's voice came from the backseat. She really hadn't appreciated me taking the time to call shotgun while her boyfriend was missing.

"I'm not joking." I said. "Are we even in the same car right now? For two people who were super concerned about me dying a few hours ago, you really don't seem to care if this car flips."

Elena grumbled something inaudible but didn't continue to argue. Damon just ignored me, something he was very good at for someone with heightened senses. I looked over at the speedometer and he was going seventy miles an hour. On a road where the speed limit is forty five. These small town roads can get windy. For someone who "didn't care" what happened to his brother, he sure did seem in a hurry to find him. If I asked him, I know he would just make some crack about frantic Elena being annoying, but deep down I really think he was anxious to make sure his brother was okay.

"We're here." Damon pulled the car into a gravel lot in front of some trees. "Okay let's make a – Elena. ELENA!"

The second that Damon got out of the car, Elena had climbed over his seat and was running towards the tree line. Despite being more than capable of doing so, he made no effort to stop her. I got out, and shot him a nervous look over the roof of the car.

"I was going to say let's make a plan, but she seems to have it all figured out." He grumbled. "Come on, let's go make sure he's not biting her head off, or whatever."

He offered me his hand and led me through a small dirt path in the woods. When we emerged into a clearing, I had to stifle a gasp. The quarry was exactly like the memory Damon had shown me. Moonlight was bouncing off of the water, the waterfall in the distance causing just the slightest ripple effect on the surface. It was a beautiful place, where a horrible thing had happened.

Damon stuck his arm out to keep me from walking any further. Elena was a few yards in front of us, observing. Stefan stood by the water. His eyes were darting around the clearing, pure terror on his face. It was as if he didn't even see any of us, he was just in his own head reliving the past. He looked horrible. Beads of sweat clung to his forehead, and the small clouds emerging from his mouth indicated that he was hyperventilating. I ducked behind Damon at the sight of Stefan, peering over his shoulder to observe.

"STEFAN." Elena called out to him, snapping him out of his trance. "Damon told me the rest of the story. He thought we might find you here."

Stefan cringed as he looked up, no doubt remembering the events that partook in this very place a century and a half ago. His face looked crazed, but not in the same way that I had seen when he was bloodthirsty. This wasn't an angry and desperate crazed. He just looked . . . broken. Shattered beyond belief. For the absolute briefest moment, I found myself almost feeling sorry for him. Then I remembered the terror I felt when I was sure he was going to kill me, and that empathy went away.

"I should have died that night. Just like I had chosen." He closed his eyes. "I should have let Damon die too."

"But you didn't." Elena said. "And if you die now, it's not going to change what happened."

"Every single person that's been hurt, every single life that's been lost is because of me." Stefan strained, tears welling in his eyes.

Elena paused for a moment, taking in Stefan's pained expression. "The night that my parents died, I blew off family night so that I could go to some party. I ended up getting stranded and they had to come pick me up. That's why we ended up in the car at Wickery Bridge, and that's why they died."

Wait what? Elena had never told me how her parents died. I recalled our previous conversations . . . her parents had died around the same time that . . . No. No no no. It wasn't possible. It couldn't be possible.

"Our actions are what set things in motion." I could barely make out Elena's voice anymore due to my head was spinning. "But we have to live with that."

I was so thankful that Damon was no longer touching me. That I wouldn't have to slip my hand out of his to get away. I had to get away. Cautiously, I took a step back. Damon was so focused on the conversation between Elena and his brother that he wasn't listening for the sound of my footsteps.

"I made a choice Elena. And because of that choice a lot of people were hurt."

Watching my footsteps so that I didn't snap a twig, I continued to move backwards. I forced myself to take slow breaths; I couldn't allow my heart rate to speed up. Not yet.

"You also made the choice to stop. To reject the person that the blood made you. You made a choice to be good Stefan."

I was at least a few feet behind Damon now, on the entrance of the pathway to the woods. If he turned around now, maybe the branches would obscure me enough that he wouldn't be able to see me right away.

"Please don't do that." Stefan pleaded.

"That's the person who jumped in the water to save the family whose car had driven off the bridge." Elena tried to convince Stefan.

Stefan had been there? I didn't know that. Elena never told me any of this. Oh my god. Stefan had been there. Did he know?

"Please don't make this all okay."

I could barely hear them now. I couldn't see them at all through the trees. No one was paying attention to me. I was in the clear.

"That's the person who saved my life."

Stefan saved Elena. Elena almost died in the car crash that killed her parents. The car crash that . . .

I turned and ran. I had to get away from them. I couldn't be around them right now. Not after hearing what I had heard. I just ran. Not back to the car; I took a left when I should have kept going straight, taking me deeper into the woods. There were no lights on the path- this wasn't exactly a highly trafficked area- so all I had to guide me was the moonlight.

Eventually I ran out of breath, and leaned against a tree for support. Breaking into sobs, I collapsed where I stood on the cold earth. Elena's parents died in the same car crash that Brandon did. It had to be them. She told me they died in May- hadn't specified beyond that. They had told me that there had been another car, another family, involved but they couldn't give me a name.

Oh my god. I was driving the car. All I remembered was seeing in animal in the road, too late to slam the breaks, swerving, and then . . . nothing. I just kept replaying it in my head. We had just left John's . . . or what used to be John's. Just found out that he had left town.

I was upset. Too upset. I shouldn't have been driving. Brandon tried to tell me as much. But I didn't listen. I should have listened to him. We were just on the bridge when Brandon had snapped me out of my daze. There was an animal. I couldn't even remember what it was. A deer? A coyote?

I tried to slam the brakes, and realized that wouldn't work. I swerved. I wasn't thinking. All I thought was that we would get hurt if I hit the animal. I didn't think about the fact that we were on a bridge. That we'd go into the water. I don't even remember hitting the water.

I strained trying to remember. Trying to search my brain for some segment of a memory that would confirm what I feared- that it was my fault, that I had killed Elena's parents, like I killed my brother. There was nothing though. There was no faint memory of another set of headlights, of anything. My next memory after making the decision to steer away from the animal was waking up in the hospital.

Stefan had been there. Stefan rescued Elena. Had he seen me? Did he know that I was responsible? No, no that wasn't possible. There's absolutely no way he wouldn't have told Elena who I was the second that she met me. That much was certain. My secret was safe.

It would have to stay that way. I couldn't tell Elena. This was a secret bigger than any promise I had made her. This wouldn't be like Elena finding out that Stefan was a killer of some abstract humans she had never met; I killed her parents. If I told her, if she knew, we'd have to leave town again. She'd hate me; anyone that she told would hate me. I'd lose my friends; I'd lose my cousin. Elena was my family, and I'd lose her. I had to keep this buried. No one could know.

I pulled myself into a ball, leaning against the tree I had collapsed against. Mentally, I willed the earth to just open up and swallow me. That would pretty much erase all of this. Unfortunately for me, although vampires and witches were real, the earth remained unable to magically devour people wanting to disappear.

Were Stefan and Elena still having a standoff in which Elena tries to convince Stefan that he's a morally sound being? Was Damon still watching them with tepid fascination? Or had he grown tired of his brother's moral dilemma. I knew that I should get up and try to find my way back before anyone realized that I was missing, if they hadn't already. But I just couldn't bring myself to get up. Though bitterly cold, the woods were tranquil and comforting. I wanted to just stay here and be invisible for a few moments more.

Truth be told, I don't think I could bear to go back. I wasn't ready to face Elena and withhold the truth from her, and I wasn't really ready to face Stefan for any reason. It made me feel sick to think of Elena so vehemently trying to convince Stefan that he was good when I wasn't sure if I would ever be able to face him again without feeling terrified.

"Lucy, what the HELL?" Damon shouted. "How many times do I have to tell you not to run off into the woods alone?"

I hadn't heard him approaching, but then again I never did. A pang of guilt immediately hit my chest; he looked genuinely worried; his brow was furrowed, temporarily etching deep lines on his forehead. In an instant, he was crouched beside me.

"Yeah well, now that I know what the source of those 'animal attacks' is, I figured I'd be safe going for a walk since I knew where you vampires were." I tried to joke, avoiding eye contact with him.

"Lucy, Stefan and I aren't the only vampires in town." He wasn't having it. "We opened the tomb, Lucy. All the other vampires that Emily saved, they got out."

"Oh." Was the only thing I could manage to say as I vaguely recalled Emily Bennett saying the words 'to save one, I had to save them all.'

"God, you can't do that! What were you thinking?" Damon cupped my face in both of his hands, forcing me to look at him, as if grasping for my attention.

"I was just . . . I just needed to . . ." I was at a loss for words. I hadn't come up for an excuse for my excursion yet.

His expression went from anger to concern as he took in my appearance for the first time. Without a doubt, my eyes were still swollen and red, and there may have even been a remnant of tear stains on my cheeks. I must've looked a damn mess.

"Needed to not be around Stefan?" He asked.

I nodded, taking the excuse. It wasn't a complete lie. I didn't want to be around Stefan. No matter how many times everyone else told me that he wouldn't hurt me again, I just wasn't ready to face him again. Not yet. Letting out a sigh, Damon sat down next to me.

"Of course you don't want to be around him. I shouldn't have made you come." He put an arm around my shoulders. "God you're shaking. Are you okay? You're not hurt, are you?"

"I'm not hurt." I shook my head. Heaven knows I wasn't okay, by any means. "Is Stefan- are they okay?"

"You're worried about Stefan?" He made a very Damon face. "Well, last I saw they had their tongues down each other's throats, and that's when I turned around and realized that you were gone."

Of course Elena and Stefan would find romance in all of this. I crinkled my nose. "Gross."

Damon let out a low laugh at my commentary. I leaned into him, wrapping my fingers around the open zipper of his jacket. The scent of leather filled my nostrils, and as I inhaled a feeling of comfort washed over me. He wasn't exactly warm, but he was warmer than the night air. For just a moment, I closed my eyes. Moments ago, I had wanted nothing but solitude. Now that Damon was here, that thought didn't quite seem to make sense.

"I think that Stefan and Elena will be occupied for the rest of the evening." Damon broke the silence. "I should get you home."

"Mmm. No need." I groaned. "I was looking forward to camping out here."

"You? Camping?" Damon prodded. "Let me know how that goes. I'll come back in the morning to collect what's left of you."

I lazily shoved my elbow into his side, knowing that it would do no damage no matter how much force I exerted. "Excuse me. I'll have you know, I was a junior Girl Scout."

"Oh forgive me, did they teach you how to hunt vampires as a junior Girl Scout?" He asked.

I shook my head. "That they did not. I'm sure had I made it to the cadette level, they would have gotten around to it."

"Well in that case," Damon slid his free arm underneath my legs. "You're coming with me. Can't leave you out here all defenseless, it wouldn't be right."

"Damon," I protested. "You don't have to carry me."

He stood up, taking me with him. "You're a flight risk."

"I am not!" I giggled as he began to walk back to his car. "Do you see your psychopath brother anywhere? No risk of running."

Damon shook his head. "That is the only time I have ever heard someone refer to Stefan as the psychopath brother instead of me."

I felt the lighthearted tone fade away ever so slightly. "Are you really that bad?"

"I'm a soulless monster." He deadpanned. "After all, I did hold you hostage all day."

"Oh come on, be serious." I demanded as I could barely contain my laughter. "I didn't exactly try to run."

"But your honor, she didn't try to run." Damon mocked. "Yeah, that's not gonna hold up in court. Also you did try to run."

"Yeah but not from you." I corrected him.

"Well you could have fooled me, seeing as I was left out of your plans." He grumbled.

I raised an eyebrow. "Are you really that mad at me?"

"I'm not mad." He denied. "It's just that if I'm going to be hunting down humans in the woods late at night, I prefer to get a meal at the end of it."

I studied his face for a moment, until his stoic expression morphed into a mischievous grin. "You're awful!"

"I told you as much." He put me down outside his car, and opened the passenger door. "Your ride, Miss."

Before I could give a second thought to what I was doing, I playfully curtsied and put on a mock proper Southern accent. "Why thank you, Mr. Salvatore."

Damon froze, his hand still on the doorframe. He set his jaw so firmly that for a moment I was certain that he was turning to stone. His already icy eyes glazed over; he was looking at nothing, but he was looking elsewhere. Just as quickly as the trance came over him, he shook his head and it was gone.

"There." He said.

"There what?"

"There. Just now. You reminded me of her." He explained.

I didn't need any clarification as to which her he was referring to. "Why, because of the accent? I'm sorry I-"

"No no no," He cut me off. "It's more than that. It's the look that you got in your eyes. So playful, and fiery. Elena may look exactly like Katherine, but she has none of her spirit. You . . . you're actually fun to be around. You keep me on my toes."

"I thought you said that neither of us have her personality." I cautioned.

"You don't." He backtracked quickly. "There's just . . . moments. Katherine was selfish, and manipulative, and evil. You are none of those things, that much I have seen."

Oh if only he knew how wrong he was. To Damon, I was just a normal, innocent seventeen year old. He didn't know what I had done, the lies that I carried. Standing before him without my necklace on, I was very aware of how quickly that all could change. It would only take one question for my secrets to no longer be secrets.

I nodded at him, not meeting his gaze as I ducked into the car. With usual Damon speed, he got into the driver's seat and reached into his pocket to hand me something. I tilted my head, a confused expression on my face.

"Your phone?" He raised an eyebrow. "You've only been asking for it all day."

"Oh. Right." I took my phone and began to go through my numerous missed calls and messages. I smacked his arm. "Damon!"

"Lucy!" He mimicked, starting the car. "What?"

"Bonnie's been freaking out!" I wasn't even sure how Bonnie got my number, probably from Caroline. "You couldn't reply and tell her I was okay?"

Damon rolled his eyes. "I promised her that you would be okay. She should know I don't break promises that I make to Bennett witches."

"God you're unbelievable." I let out a frustrated sigh before sending a text back to the frantic witch.

So sorry. I'm okay. Will talk tomorrow. –Lucy.

I crossed my arms and leaned back in the seat, noting that Damon drove considerably less recklessly now that he wasn't searching for Stefan. I considered making a crack about it, but decided against it. Now wasn't the time. Before I knew it, Damon had pulled his car to a stop outside my house.

"Here you are, ma'am." He teased.

I looked at the dark windows in the house, and noted that my parents must already be asleep. I'd have to be quiet when letting myself in.

"Shit." I whispered.

"What's wrong?" Damon's brow furrowed.

"My car. I drove to Elena's yesterday." I explained. Thinking about unlocking the door made me realize I didn't have my keys on me. "It's still there."

"Really? You're just now remembering this?" He retorted.

"I've been a little distracted today." I crossed my arms. "Dammit, I don't even know where my keys are. I probably dropped my purse somewhere in the woods."

"Can you get in the house?" He asked.

I nodded. "We keep a spare key hidden outside."

"Then go inside." He instructed. "I'll take care of it."

"But –"

"No buts. You've had a long day." He silenced me. "Now go inside and get some sleep. If you leave your window unlocked I might even come in and give you another dream about me when I come back."

I looked at him. "Don't do that."

"Do what?" He feigned innocence.

"That play-flirty whatever it is thing that you do." I said. "Just don't."

"Who said I was playing?" He leaned across the console to whisper in my ear. "Goodnight, Lucy."

My face flushed. "Goodnight, Damon."

I was so flustered I almost tripped as I got out of the car. I could feel Damon watching me the entire time I entered my house, and I was so thankful that my parents were already asleep so that I wouldn't have to explain my red face and lack of a car.

It wasn't that I didn't like the attention. Damon had possessed the ability to make my heart skip a beat since the night that I met him. But I couldn't have a flirty whatever type of relationship with Elena's boyfriend's brother. That would be too complicated. Damon was my friend. My extremely handsome, blood thirsty friend. That was all.

By the time I finished showering, I was already struggling to keep my eyes open. I looked towards my window, and debated just for a moment unlocking it like Damon had said, but shook my head at the idea. When I tucked myself into bed, I barely had time to appreciate the feeling of sleeping in my own bed before sleep overtook my mind.

I was expecting nightmares, that much I knew. With everything I had learned in the past twenty-four hours, I just wasn't sure what my jumbled mind would bring to me in my sleep. It brought me back to the night I knew all too well, driving out of Mystic Falls with Brandon beside me in the passenger seat.

"Lucy, are you sure you're okay?" Brandon asked. "We can pull over. Get food somewhere. Mom and dad will understand if we're late."

"I'm fine Brandon." I choked out. "I just want to get home."

"Are you sure? Because you shouldn't be driving if you're so-"

"I said I'm FINE Brandon." I snapped. I didn't mean for it to come out so harsh.

Brandon didn't say anything after that. I knew I should apologize. He was just trying to help. But I just wanted to get out of this stupid town. Mom and dad decided to raise me elsewhere and I should have never come back. We were coming up on the bridge that would take us away from Mystic Falls.

"Lucy look out!" Brandon yelled.

I snapped out of it. In the road was a person. I slammed the breaks, but not soon enough. The car got so close the figure was illuminated in the headlights. It wasn't Vicki this time; it was Stefan. I recognized the look on his face, eyes blackened with veins popping out underneath. He wanted blood.

I jerked the wheel to avoid him, but when I tried to steer back the car just kept sliding. The road was slippery, too slippery. The last thing I heard before crashing through the barely-there railings on the bridge was a car horn, echoing in my ears.

As I braced myself for impact, the car horn faded into the beeping sound of a heart monitor, and when I opened my eyes I was in an ambulance. There was only one paramedic, whose back was turned to me. I tried to move, but couldn't, my wrists were restrained.

"What's going on?" I panicked. "Why am I here?"

"You know why you're here." The paramedic turned to face me. Stefan. "We have unfinished business."

"Where's my brother?" I screamed. "Just let me go!"

"You killed him." Stefan leaned over and stuck a syringe in my arm, filling it with my blood. "You killed them all."

I know that no one else

can save me from myself

but these words, like painted glass