A/N: Thanks to TwoPence for beta reading. I imagine the first scene will make many of you angry, as I put my own spin on what I consider the single most aggravating scene from canon. It's pivotal to the story, so I felt I'd be doing a disservice if I just told you to go read 5.04.
ooOoo
Yesterday, Dad and I had run into Emma and her father at the mall, and after good ole oblivious Alan had asked my equally oblivious father whether I was still being bullied, Emma had shot me a smirk of cruel, malicious joy at the fact that she'd never get caught. Naturally I'd punched her in the face, and for one perfect moment she'd had nothing to say. Of course, one of our city's fine heroes was there to step in. Naturally. Not the hundreds of times I'd been harassed, no, they'd stepped in the second I'd retaliated, and never once asked me for my side of the story. I understood why. When an ugly girl punches a beautiful model, it was pretty clear who the bad guy was. Fuck the PRT, fuck the Wards, I was fucking glad I hadn't thought I was cool enough to join them. They were as shallow and vapid as all the other cool kids I'd ever met. Armsmaster was representative of their whole garbage institution. Stealing credit for my work, calling me names, he was just like Madison, and Shadow Stalker, she was a Sophia Hess if I'd ever met one. Fuck them both. On the bus ride home I'd admitted to Dad that it had been Emma. She was the bully. He'd called up the principal, who'd arranged a meeting. Naturally she'd had Alan Barnes, the Trio, and the parents responsible for raising such fine upstanding Winslow students in the room with me. Because everyone knows that it's a good idea to interrogate the victim with all their abusers present. What? No? Are you saying that the school might not have had my best interest in mind? Oh wow Dad, I'd have never considered the possibility that the administration at my beloved school were a bunch of self-serving, two-faced assholes.
Principal Blackwell had asked me for evidence, so I'd given her some evidence. Every single abuse I'd recorded, with dates and times and names.
"I'm not saying she's making things up," said Principal Blackwell, dismissing all my accusations as I'd known she would. "But when someone has been victimized like she has, it's not unusual for them to see harassment when there is none. We want to ensure that Emma, Sophia, and Madison get fair treatment."
"What about Taylor's treatment?" Dad asked angrily. "If even one in ten things on those papers is true, it speaks to an ongoing campaign of severe abuse. Does anyone disagree?"
"Abuse is a strong word," Alan said smoothly. "She's just overly sensitive after the death of her moth-"
"Don't go there," I said. Pinning it all on my dead mother, pinning it all on me. As if it were unreasonable to want some goddamn justice for being stuffed in a locker full of month old tampons. Fuck Alan Barnes. I tried to keep calm, keep my breathing even, but still knocked all my papers off the principal's desk. As if the locker was some small thing, let's see how you like being shoved somewhere uncomfortable. The portal in the Atlantic was active. I could send them there. Emma, Sophia, Madison, all the teachers, parents, and administrators going along with minimizing everything that had been done to me. It'd just be a harmless prank right? Maybe you're just overly sensitive. Have you ever considered, Alan, that it's actually your fault your daughter's dead? "Prove that you're human. Please."
Emma smirked victoriously for just a moment, before schooling her features into fear and contrition. The practiced face she'd used to manipulate her father and the administration a dozen times before. Great. I'd let her bait me into anger, which made my argument look weak. I'd known she'd try to play me, and I'd still let it fucking happen. Worst part was that even though I knew what she was doing, it just made me angrier, which just made her game work even better. Not that it fucking mattered. She had the school bent over backwards, ready to take whatever bullshit she shoved up their asses. She wasn't as smart as she thought, she just had a lawyer for a father, and a pathetic administration that was terrified of a lawsuit.
"You promised me you'd look after Taylor after the locker," said Dad, staring at the teachers, at the principal, starting to tremble. "You obviously haven't."
Neither had he. Not paying attention, thinking that the school would do a damn thing. No, no, it wasn't his fault. I was just angry about how things were going, angry that I'd been right. Winslow was a big pile of shit, and if Bakuda wanted to blow it up, I'd fucking let her. Why couldn't she have shoved a bomb up Emma's brain, instead of some Chinese kid who didn't deserve it?
"I'd have liked to," said Principal Blackwell. "But this is Winslow. We've got fights everyday, kids bringing guns and drugs to school. Neglect that and I haven't got one girl facing some light harassment, I've got a pile of dead students. I can't be everywhere. If I'm not aware of certain events, it's hardly intentional."
"So Taylor's situation isn't serious?" Dad asked, his voice starting to rise. Obviously not. We were poor, we didn't have the right connections. We didn't matter.
"Do you have to see everything in the worst possible light?" Principal Blackwell snapped. "I'm not trying to offend you, just give you some perspective."
"Don't let it get to you Blackwell, a quick temper just runs in their family," said Alan. Would that little insult go unpunished? Unnoticed? Of course. It always did when it was one of them. "That said, let's cut to the chase. Not all of us can afford to take time off from work. What would you two like to see happen, here, at this table, that would have you walk away satisfied?"
Satisfied? Activating a stamp on the table, and giving Lung a trio of companions to keep him company, maybe a lawyer and principal too. It'd mean losing the moral high ground, but I was quickly realizing how little that meant to anyone. All that mattered was power.
I stared at Madison. Sophia. Emma. Madison ran from my glare, Sophia met it with one her own. Emma didn't deign to return it, she checked her perfectly manicured nails, her designer watch which cost more than Dad made in a month. Fuck I hated her. Worst thing was that she was gorgeous. She wouldn't make it as a model, she'd never be able to hold a job, but she'd be able to marry into wealth. She'd always have some gullible dufus to cover her ass. Her actions would never catch up to her.
"I'd want those three to have in-school suspensions for the remaining two months of the semester," I said. "No privileges either. They wouldn't be allowed dances, access to school events, computers, or a spot on teams or clubs."
A suspension would just be a reward to them.
"Sophia's one of our best runners in Track and Field," said Principal Blackwell. "It's important that she keep attending. I've heard the structure is good for her."
"I really, really don't care," I said. I didn't. Why the fuck would Principal Blackwell possibly think I gave a single fuck about Sophia Hess's wellbeing. She'd probably been the one to shove me into the locker, physical assault had always been her style.
"We don't have the staff to keep watch over them," said Principal Blackwell. "Nor the funding for it. It's not feasible."
"Would I have to take summer school?" Asked Madison fearfully.
"There would be remedial classes if we took that route, yes," Principal Blackwell said. "It's a little too severe. Why not a suspension instead?"
Severe? Okay, principal, how 'bout I shove you into a locker with month old tampons and let you wallow in it for a few hours. Then let's see how much of a shit you give about me. Oh, and also, why don't I piss all over your dead mother's grave, maybe destroy a keepsake or two, and tell you to quit your job and go be a whore for the merchants?
"Suspension's a vacation," I said. "I'd rather they got no punishment than that."
"Sounds like a good option to me," Alan quipped. "Because as far as I can tell, your list would only mean something if you could back any of it up with evidence." He smirked and glanced down. "And if it wasn't all over the floor."
He must've thought he was being a white knight, a good father, doing his duty to protect his daughter. He wasn't. He was an ass. I'd figured as much. Emma had to get it from somewhere.
"I think two months is too much," said Madison's dad weakly.
"I'm forced to agree on all counts," said the principal. Of course she did. "But evidence or no, I've got enough experience to know guilt when I see it. Two weeks suspension. Any more and their schoolwork will suffer. I don't think that's fair."
That almost made it worse. If you were gonna screw me; screw me. This half assed attempt to be impartial was just insulting.
"And mine hasn't?" I asked.
"Eye-for-an-eye justice doesn't do anyone any favors," said the principal. Strange how some people mistook cowardice for compassion.
"Is there any justice here?" I asked, giggling. "I'm not seeing any."
"They're being punished for their misconduct."
Were they? Because all I saw was an administrator covering her own ass. I put a stamp on the principal's table. There. Justice. It would be easy. So easy.
"Whatever," I said. "I knew you wouldn't punish them. Maybe if their parents have an ounce of heart or responsibility, they'll find an appropriate punishment. I wouldn't bet a penny on it." I gave the Trio's folks a dismissive glance. "If any of you had any clue how to be parents, your daughters wouldn't have become complete monsters in the first place, but whatever. I don't care. Just transfer me to Arcadia."
"That's not really something I can do," the principal said, "There's jurisdictions-"
"Try," I said.
"I don't want to make any promises I can't keep," she said.
Which meant no. Time to go. Before I did something I probably wouldn't actually regret.
"We're not the enemy," said the principal.
"You've already fucked me, why bother pretending to be impartial now?" I laughed bitterly, and my anger cooled. "You haven't called me by my name once. You've dehumanized me from the start, because you knew what you were gonna do. Can't risk a lawsuit, not when one of the accused has a daddy that's a lawyer. You've made it far, you know the game. You don't keep power by being a decent person, you keep it by kissing the ass's of anyone who can take it from you. Me and Dad, we can't do shit to you, so your job is to politely tell us to fuck off. I suppose, in this day-and-age, that makes you a 'good' principal. I just hope that someday you realize that Brockton Bay isn't dying because of the ABB or the Empire, they're just symptoms, it's dying because of self-serving, slimy, pieces of sh-"
"Taylor!" Dad pulled on my arm, "Stop!"
"Do I need to call the cops?" Asked Alan lightly. "Reowr."
"Fuck off," said Dad. "Taylor's right. This has been a joke. I have a friend in the media, I think I'll be giving her a call."
"I'd advise against that," Alan said. "Your daughter assaulted Emma last night. We could press charges, and unlike you I have actual evidence. Surveillance video, and written testimony from the superheroine Shadow Stalker."
Evidence. What a joke. I was ugly. Emma was beautiful. I was poor. Emma was rich. I had no friends. Emma was one of the most popular girls in school. Bring us to court, who's gonna be able to convince people to talk in their favor, who's gonna have the money for a sustained legal battle, who were they gonna be predisposed to agree with? Alan Barnes could play the system all he liked. Win through the courts and pretend it was justice. I suppose it would be, he'd have the power of the state on his side. Not gonna lie; all the Empire and ABB radicals who wanted to burn it all down didn't sound so crazy right now. Dad tried to argue with him. I wish he wouldn't. It just made him look like a naive fool, who thought the school system, the legal system, had been designed for fantasies like justice, and not just to preserve the interests of those in power. I wish Dad would wake the fuck up, realize it was all a big joke, and suckers like us were the punchline.
I'd had enough. I left. Any more of this shit, and I really would murder them all. Dad ran after me.
"Taylor," said Dad. "I want you to know I love you. I know this didn't go how you wanted, but I've had worse days at the negotiating table. Life isn't fair, but you can't stop fighting, can't give up on doing what's right. This isn't over, and I'll be waiting for you when you come home. Don't give up, and don't do anything reckless."
"Goodbye Dad. I love you too."
I left. I ran. Ran until I couldn't run anymore.
I was done. I was so done. If I couldn't be transferred, if the Trio weren't going to be punished, I was dropping out. Emma would keep pushing, and I'd snap, use my powers against her. Maybe it would start small, maybe I wouldn't kill her at first, but once I started I'd never stop. I'd killed Lung and felt nothing, but threatening Tattletale had felt cathartic, and I knew why. Tattletale reminded me of Emma, and Lung did not, even though he was objectively more dangerous, more evil than a petty thief who'd shown no inclination towards violence. Actually hurting Emma, rather than a proxy, that'd be a thousand times more euphoric than heroin, and a thousand times more dangerous too. If I gave in to temptation, used my power to kill Emma, it'd give me a rush like nothing else. I'd chase that high, I'd kill Sophia and Madison. And then I'd move onto Alan, to Principal Blackwell, to Mr Gladly, and all the rest who'd bullied me when I'd been weak. If I gave in to the resentment in my heart, I would become a monster, as bad as Kaiser or Bakuda, maybe worse.
I could never be a conventional hero. Not anymore. Maybe I could've before Mom had died, before Emma had turned on me, before those who were supposed to protect me left me to rot, but not now. I had a monster inside me, eating the sweet little girl I'd once been and replacing her with someone callous and ruthless. I didn't believe in empathy. I didn't believe in redemption. I didn't believe in the PRT, the schools, or the courts.
I believed in evil. I believed in malice. I believed in fear. I believed in violence and death.
People didn't need help. They didn't need a hero to save them. They just needed the evil fuckers who hurt them to disappear. That was it. That was all.
Tonight I was going to take down Bakuda, Oni Lee, and the rest of the ABB. Honestly, I should've attacked on the night I'd met Tattletale. It wouldn't have been smart. Setting up the Atlantic Portal made me a lot more dangerous, and increased the chances of operational success. Still, every moment I waited gave Bakuda more time to implant bombs in people's heads, increasing the number of expected casualties. Lisa and Tattletale had both warned me against recycling battleplans, but I couldn't see a better way to stop them. Tattletale was probably just fucking with me. Lisa was just worried about losing her only connection with a cape.
Still, Lisa was the closest thing I had to a friend. The only person besides my dad who I actually thought was a good person. She was what made Brockton Bay worth saving. I owed her a call. I found the nearest pay phone and dialed her up.
"Don't do this," said Lisa. "You can't use the same trick twice, not if it can be easily countered. I haven't met Bakuda, but I can guess what she has planned for you. Don't go. If you do, your plan is going to blow up in your face."
"If I die," I said. "I die."
"I'd miss you," said Lisa. "Your dad would miss you. From what I've seen he's clueless, but he's not as bad as I thought. However poorly he shows it, he really does care. I should unmask you. You'll hate me, but it's better than letting you go and commit suicide."
"I'll still go," I said. "I'd still refuse to join the PRT. They're useless. All unmasking me would do is ruin my life, but it won't change my path. Nothing you do or say can."
A meaningful death didn't scare me, a meaningless life did.
"Fine," Lisa said tightly. "Not like I can ever convince you of anything. But if you notice anything off, bail. Abandon the stamp in the Atlantic, and run as fast as you can."
"Thanks Lisa," I said. "I'll be careful."
But I wouldn't run. Someone was dying tonight. Maybe Bakuda. Maybe Oni Lee. Probably me. I was fine with that.
"Don't thank me," Lisa said. "Learn."
It wasn't a short walk to ABB headquarters, it took me about 90 minutes to jog there, which was good. Let me box up all my frustrations about school, and push them out of my mind. I needed to be calm, logical, observant during my mission. This operation was more important than my personal life.
The Docks were oddly vacant. There were none of the men or women prowling the streets that I remembered from my last jaunt to Bad Boy territory. Not a good sign. How many people had Bakuda implanted?
Their headquarters were now located in a big warehouse between the Docks and the Boat Graveyard. An empty parking lot surrounded the warehouse. Normally, that would make it harder to approach the headquarters, but with my stampsense, I could tell that the parking lot was empty and nobody was near the windows. I snuck closer, planted a stamp near the front door, hid behind a corner, and waited. And waited. None of the people inside made to leave.
With some hesitance, I checked a window. Good. Bakuda was inside. Jackpot, so was a man wearing a demon mask. Oni Lee. As were about fifteen ABB members, huddling together. Perfect. I just had to wait for them to leave, get close to my stamp, and I'd be able to teleport them both to the bottom of the Atlantic before they even realized they were under attack. Dealing with the goons…
The goons?
I kneaded my hands together. Something was wrong. Something was off. Maybe it was the fact that everything was going so well? No, no, I'd only ever been on two missions before. It wasn't like I was some expert, maybe on most of my hitjobs everything would go smoothly.
Still though, something was off. Something I'd overlooked in planning? I got out a tennis ball. It was possible that they'd leave using a different door. It would certainly make things harder, but I'd be able to sense their new route, throw the ball, and take out Bakuda and Oni Lee before they could react. Nothing I couldn't counteract.
What was I overlooking? Maybe I was just nervous? Probably. No. No, I'd learned to trust my gut in these situations. I risked another peak into the warehouse. Okay, definitely Bakuda and Oni Lee, or at least their costumes. Could be body doubles. Actually, it didn't really seem like they were doing anything. Like they were waiting. Waiting for what?
Something was definitely off. Maybe I was panicking? No, no, think, think, what's wrong? The goons…
Were evenly split, male and female. Between children and the elderly. No adult men though, which was- fuck they were crying, crying like they knew they were going to die, like they were bait in a fucking tr-
Shit!
I put a stamp on my tennis ball and flung it with all my might, noticing the dark gleam of a security camera too late.
The warehouse exploded.
I felt pressure and heat just as I teleported from the blast. I reappeared farther away, decreasing the impact of the explosion. It still caused me to tumble, roll, slam into a nearby building. Vision swam. Skin burning. Coughing.
Warehouse crumbling. Half caved in. Overturned cement. Smoke. Fire.
I collapsed onto the pavement. Couldn't hold myself up any longer. Couldn't feel my legs. Felt a sudden pressure on small of my back. Oni Lee.
Teleported back to original stamp near front door. Cement still too hot from explosion. Burned skin. Tried to crawl. Hands and forearm red and blistered. Severe burns.
A low moan left my throat.
Oni Lee pinned me again.
Teleported back to ball. Couldn't escape Oni Lee. Fucking teleporters, what a broken bullshit power. Teleported back, but Oni Lee followed again. Fucking unfair that he had such a great power. Tried something new. Teleported Oni Lee above the tennis ball stamp as much as possible. Ten feet. Nonfatal fall but would still hurt. Oni Lee teleported back on top of me. Right. Teleporter. Fuck.
"So," said Bakuda casually, her white metal boots about thirty feet from me. Well out of my range. "You're the cape who killed Lung. A teleporter who doesn't rely on line-of-sight. You rely on ports, right? Like fast travel points in a videogame? One is obviously that tennis ball, the other is the pavement by the door."
I heard Oni Lee unsheath a knife.
"Not yet," said Bakuda quickly. "Soon. I owe it to her to tell her how she was outwitted. She handed me the ABB afterall. First she kills Lung for me, then she's stupid enough to use the same plan twice, as if we were incapable of planning ahead. Did you know about me? Should've looked into my grades. Should've known I'd make precautions. And here I was worried. Saw you chatting with Tattletale, trying to get her on your side. Luckily for her, she turned you down. Unluckily for you. I can't imagine she'd be so retarded as to just stroll up to the front door of a known genius bomb tinker."
I groaned.
"Don't interrupt," said Bakuda sharply. "When I speak, you lend me your ear."
Oni Lee acted immediately. A cold sharp cut across my right ear. Wet tearing. I hissed out in pain, but the horror was worse. He'd taken my ear. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. I was going to die. Oh fuck, I was going to die.
"You made us look weak." I could hear the smile in Bakuda's sadistic voice. "Kaiser sent us a fucking message. Not personally of course, couldn't deign to parley with a subhuman personally, sent a green, little cape in his stead. He'd give us a month to track you down, kill you, and retreat. Then he'd annex our territory. Such a magnanimous nazi. A prize for a prize, I say. I think I'll send him a present. Not your head, that'll be placed above my mantle, but maybe a thumb… No, no, can't let my emotions get in the way. I'll send your thumb to Armsmaster. He stole credit. He ought to know the consequences if he'd actually done what he'd said he'd done."
"For Lung," Oni Lee said and grabbed my left hand, forced it flat against concrete. Tried to teleport. Couldn't. Hurt too much. My fingers were pried open. Tried to fight him off. Too strong. His knife found my thumb. Cut through skin and muscle, stopped suddenly on bone.
I screamed.
"A finger isn't a piece of bread," Bakuda lectured. "You don't saw it off. Strike with force. You're making us look incompetent Oni Lee. It can be edited out in post, but a keen eye will see the wound on her finger."
As if he hadn't mangled my finger on purpose. I managed to look up.
"Of course you have two thumbs." Bakuda was holding a home recorder. "Switch to her right, and do it cleanly this time."
I tried to curl up. Oni Lee was stronger, but adrenaline and fear gave me second wind. I tried teleporting a few more times. Unfortunately, I didn't grow my ear back, nor escape. In less than a minute, Oni Lee had me pinned.
"Let me tell you a secret, little white girl," said Bakuda. "I don't hate you. I hated Lung just as you did. It was obvious why anyone would want to kill him. Most didn't try, out of fear. That's what I learned from him. Fear is what really controls people. You know who Asians really hate? Not Blacks, not Whites, other Asians. Fear of him brought us together. Fear is what made the ABB. Lung understood this instinctually. I understand it intellectually, and I'm going to take us to the next level. Offing you is just the beginning. When I'm through with this quaint little shitstain of a town, nobody will ever forget the name, Bak-"
A giant, bony dog-like creature kicked her into a nearby building.
I was forcibly thrown seven feet when another mutant dog tore Oni Lee off me, and ragdolled him with a shake of its giant head. Oni Lee vanished in a puff of dust, reappeared on top of the dog, and unpinned a grenade. I teleported both the grenade and clone away, and darkness overtook me.
I mean literal darkness. And silence. I felt somebody pull me up onto one of the giant creatures, and let my consciousness fade away.
The first sensation to return was pain. I had burns all along my back, shredded muscles and ligaments in my thumb, but all those were inconsequential compared to the pain in my ear. My ear which no longer existed. Fuck. I was such a fucking joke.
I forced my eyes open.
"Hmm…" Tattletale said, rubbing her chin. "I forget… Did I, or did I not directly and clearly tell you to avoid ABB Headquarters? Hmm…"
She had. Clearly and numerously. So had Lisa. Multiple times. Because she'd thought there would be a trap.
Perfect. Now I was ashamed as well as hurt. Not even Emma could tear me down so effic-
"Thanks for saving me," I said. So Tattletale shamed me? I deserved it. I was in her debt, and I'd do my best to repay her, but there were some lines that were bigger than me and my personal sense of honor. "I'm still not joining your team."
I didn't even have the strength to sit up on the dirty couch they'd laid me on. They'd bandaged up my wounds, probably cleaned them too. I didn't recall wearing a shirt quite so pink, which was tight everywhere except the chest. I tried to plan an escape in case they wouldn't take no for an answer. First who I'd be escaping from.
Besides Tattletale, there were three other supervillains lounging about the room. There was no rhyme or reason to their uniforms, with a large butch girl wearing the only one I found remotely acceptable. Normal clothes and a cheap dog mask. One villain was dressed in black leathers and wore a skull mask. A ridiculous costume, covering what should have been an absolute specimen of a body. The other boy wore an outfit that would have maybe been fashionable in 1500's Italy, but just made him like a nerdy drama kid in Brockton Bay. As ridiculous as I found them, I wouldn't make the mistake of underestimating them. They'd fared far better against Bakuda than I had.
Fuck my ear hurt. And my thumb. And my back. And my right arm, now that I thought about it. Oh, it had a big scrape on it. When had that happened?
"So," said Tattletale. "You've still got cold feet about joining? I know you don't approve of theft, but I've talked it over with bossman, and you wouldn't have to be a part of it. We've got orders to rob Brockton Bay Central Bank in a few days. I'm not going to ask you to be a part of that. We'd only work together when our goals aligned."
"The fuck," said the butch girl. "You never asked me if she could join. You don't get to decide on your own. Fuck that!"
"Bitch," said Tattletale, "I don't need your vote. I've already got Grue and Regent on board."
She nodded at the wannabe edge lord and the wannabe renaissance man respectively.
Bitch growled. "Fuck you. Shoulda' fucking told me. Knew I shouldn't have trusted you. Fucking talkers."
"And we're not robbing Brockton Bay Central Bank," said Grue. "Stupid. The wards are gonna show up, you admitted as much. Why in the world would we willingly agree to that?"
"Hate to side with stick-in-the-mud over a blonde babe who's almost as smart as Faultline," said Regent. "But he's right."
"You agreed," said Tattletale, an edge of worry in her voice.
"I agreed to think about it," said Grue. "I've thought about it. The protectorate may be out of town, but we'll still have to contend with the wards. It's too risky. No."
"Just three," said Tattletale desperately. "Four tops."
"Just three?" Asked Grue sarcastically. "Are you insane? What kind of overconfident moron knowingly picks a fight with another cape? The answer is no."
Bitch was furious. "You don't get to deci-"
"It doesn't matter," I said, cutting off the supposed argument. I suspected it was a ploy from Tattletale, to try to convince me that her ability to manipulate wasn't as great as I suspected. Grue and Regent were just playing roles, how did I know their supposed resistance wasn't something they'd planned from the start? How did I know the job on the Brockton Bay Central Bank was even real? And that desperation from Tattletale, probably just to make the supposed Coil character she'd mentioned more believable. The lighthearted atmosphere? That was to target my loneliness, there's no way Tattletale hadn't uncovered that obvious weakness. "I'm not joining."
Bitch stared at me. "Fuck you."
Maybe it was an offer I couldn't refuse.
My stamps near ABB headquarters were still active, and I sensed nobody around them. I could reapply one of the stamps to the couch, and teleport aw-
Stupid. No. Bakuda had some notion of my powers. She may have left a sniper just out of my range. Better, she'd probably just left a few bombs and a security camera. If I went back, Bakuda was sure to greet me with an explosion. No, it would be idiotic to ever use those stamps again. Instead I'd put a stamp on a projectile. The table near me had some empty soda cans. I could reach out and apply a stamp to one of the cans, and maybe throw it near the door and make a run for it.
My everything protested at the thought. Yeah I was way too tired and too hurt to get into a chase.
"Speaking of overconfident morons," said Tattletale smugly. "I told you not to go to ABB headquarters. You ignored me, got yourself blown up, so I had to come and save you. Bakuda got us on videotape punting her into a building, treating Oni Lee like a chewtoy, and oh yeah- saving your ungrateful ass. So now I've got a target on my back, on all my friends' backs, all to save you."
I squirmed, which set my back on fire as my burns rubbed against the couch. Fucking Tattletale. She was right, and now I felt guilty. Dammit I hated dealing with her. Just a few days ago I'd been so deadset against joining the Undersiders, and now I could feel her starting to sway me. I knew she was manipulating me, playing me like a fiddle like Emma always tried to, but what was I supposed to do? The fact of the matter was that she had warned me against going to ABB headquarters, she had strongly hinted it would be rigged with explosives, and then bailed me out when I'd ignored her. She was right, I did owe her. She was also right, we both needed to stop the ABB, and it would be pragmatic to form a temporary alliance. Afterall, treating her like an enemy had almost gotten me killed.
On the otherhand, fuck Tattletale.
I really, really wanted to rationalize that she'd known I wouldn't trust her, and had given me good advice knowing that I'd ignore it. It would be so easy to treat her like some Simurgh-lite, blame her for every bad thing that happened to me. Unfortunately, I'd come to hate self-delusional assholes. I could admit the truth. I hated Tattletale because she reminded me of Emma rather than any objective reason. Logically, I knew eventually I'd have to start trusting people again.
On the otherhand, fuck Tattletale. It didn't have to be her.
"The Undersiders have full medical. Our boss has connections with surgeons," said Grue. He held up a red party cup full of ice and my ear. "And if you join us we could have them reattach your ear."
"And maybe give you a boobjob while they're at it," said Regent, no doubt smirking behind his mask. "Don't pretend you wouldn't like it."
Grue punched him in the arm.
Much as I would like to deny it, I was tempted. I couldn't explain losing an ear to Dad. Maybe I could cover up the burns on my back and legs, but he'd notice a missing ear. Of course, even if it was reattached, he'd notice. Not to mention vanity. I knew I was ugly, but that didn't mean I wanted to make myself even more repulsive. I didn't want to look like a freak, not to my dad, not to Lisa, and not to her hot friend Brian.
Also I hurt all over. A lot. My ear. My thumb. My back. Pretty much anywhere, if I made the mistake of focusing on it. Prescription painkillers. They were tempting too.
"You may not have to unmask yourself," said Tattletale. "In a day or two the ear might be explainable. If Bakuda goes on a rampage, it'd be believable that you just happened to be close to one of her bombs at the wrong time."
I perked up, how fucked up was that? Pretty bad, but pretty normal, I'd bet. Sure Bakuda blowing up the Bay would kill a lot of people, but if she didn't, then I'd have to explain that I was a cape to my dad and that would be kind of awkward. So yeah, other people's lives, or a slight inconvenience to my own, I knew which I cared more about. Afterall, they were other people, and I was me, so obviously I'd pick me. Was this how people got into villainy? Selfishness?
I had to be better than that. I had to have principles. I wasn't going to become a villain, even in name only, just for the sake of convenience or vanity or even out of gratitude.
"I've almost got you my pretty," said Tattletale, winking at me. "If you won't do it for yourself, do it for Brockton Bay. Bakuda knows you're a teleporter, they know that you're capable of tracking them, and they probably have a good idea how. You try and teleport into their base, and they'll just explode you again. If you want to stop the ABB, you're going to need our help."
I tried to find a fault in her logic. Couldn't. Bakuda knew how my powers worked, and had already demonstrated that she could counter them. I'd have to think of a new approach against an enemy with more resources and capes. But Bakuda was smart too, and there was little to suggest that whatever I came up with would work. The best path to defeating the ABB was joining the Undersiders.
Tattletale's smirk reminded me of Emma. If that bitch were a cape, she'd have powers like Tattletale. Able to worm her way into my head, make me agree to whatever she wanted.
Become a villain and defeat the ABB. Or refuse, and stand by my rigid ethics.
I wish it was a hard decision. I wish I had the black-and-white worldview which would allow me to be an uncompromising ass. But I'd seen those asian children having bombs put in their brains. It wasn't about me and my grudge with Tattletale, it wasn't about being a hero, it was about making Brockton Bay just a little bit less shitty by standing up for the refugees when nobody else ever seemed to care.
"Fine," I said sourly, taking my slippery first step towards the slope of villainy. "I'll join. But only until we've gotten rid of the ABB."
"Oh fuck yes!" Tattletale started sprinting around the room, pumping her fists, high-fiving her teammates. "Hell. The fuck. Yes."
"We got her." Grue and Regent quietly bumped fists, as if some C-lister agreeing to work with them actually mattered. I supposed I'd be good for quick escapes. "We actually got her."
"Oh hell yeah!" Said Tattletale, twirling. "We did it, we actually did it! She said yes! She fucking said yes! Oh my god, we got Everywhere! We just got Everywhere! Finally, we've got our middle of the order heavy hitter, our leading lady, our once-in-a-generation prodigy. We just signed the next Alexandria, you do realize that right?"
Who the fuck was Everywhere? Wait, was that supposed to be me? What a stupid fucking name. Maybe I really would go by the mockery of a moniker Armsmaster had given me.
"If you say so," said Regent.
"She'll be a valuable asset," said Grue.
"I cannot believe Armsmaster fell for my smokescreen," Tattletale said, shaking her head, her arms extended in a what-can-you-do pose. "Everyone but me is dumb! I'm the smartest person alive! I cannot believe I just pulled this off! This one is gonna go down in the history books! Now we can go cape for cape against anyone! Ladies and gentlemen, our days in the back pages are over. Get your popcorn ready, because the Undersiders are about to tear up the big leagues! Azn Bad Boys, you've already lost! Empire 88, get the fuck outta here! Travelers, your princess is in another castle! Palanquin, you just don't have the horses to compete anymore! And Coil- Coil, Coil, Coil. You're gonna wish we'd never met! Never shoulda let me get my hands on a cape like this…"
Tattletale continued to mock me. Regent and Grue cruelly played along. Bitch, strangely enough, seemed a bit kinder. Not on my side, but she just seemed confused by the bullying. Typical. I finally decide to be a part of something, and the first thing they do is make fun of me. I now understood their excitement. I'd probably be a nice cape to have, but it had been about power. Tattletale had set out to corrupt me, and she'd cut through my resistances like a hot knife through an ear. Fuck, now I felt humiliated and my ear hurt. She was just celebrating herself, her power over me, like Emma had when she'd broken Mom's flute.
But I was a cape now, I didn't just have to sit here and take it. Probably.
"Enough," I said quietly.
Surprisingly, Tattletale shut up immediately.
"Are decisions made by majority?" I asked.
"Yes," said Grue. "Although on a mission, I take the lead. When things get hot, you do what I say."
"Right," I said. No matter their mockery I needed their help. I was making the right decision. The important thing was not to be corrupted. If I wasn't careful, the Undersiders might rub their evil ways off on me, but perhaps I could in turn show them what it meant to be truly good. "Then I agree with Tattletale and Bitch. We should rob the Brockton Bay Central Bank."
I know that that's what a supervillain would say, but I promise I had a good reason for it. Trust me. I explained my plan to the rest of my team, highlighting the operational objectives which made it ethically justifiable. Indeed, I had no other choice if I wanted to minimize casualties.
"Damn," said Grue.
"Damn," said Bitch.
"Damn," said Tattletale.
"Damn," said Regent. "I've seen a lot of villains, but…"
"We've all done our best to learn the trade," said Tattletale. "But the best are just born with it."
Wait, were they saying my plan was evil? More mockery I'm sure. Anything to make me uncomfortable. However, nothing about my plan was remotely villainous. Perhaps the means were a bit underhanded, but what was important was the outcome, and if my plan succeeded it would help Brockton Bay more in one afternoon than a decade of PRT guidance. Results were what I cared about, more than some dogmatic adherence to what others deemed acceptable. I was just doing what needed doing.