Hi guys.
I'm back and sorry for making you guys wait. There were no updates since January since I was unable to work on the story. Mostly due to university and other factors in my life causing me to lose time to focus on writing new chapters. I tried to mitigate my workload to compensate by getting transcripts - and I thought that having a mid-semester break from university would allow me to finally work on a new chapter. Unfortunately, this is where the factors in my life come up - I've had to do other stuff as well (I won't go into too much detail for privacy reasons - but it's just stuff that made me busy, nothing too bad). That being said, I'm on break for this month (JULY) - so I should be able to post a few chapters! When the month ends - I'm not sure I'll be able to update until the end of the year (like when this fic was published) - so when July ends, expect me to be back during November and December! Maybe a month earlier too if possible.
What the people in the theater are going to react to is actually another fanfic that I've gotten permission to do! It's a humorous one-shot called 'Beacon Beauty Standards' by the author Titanmaster 117. Big thanks Titanmaster! (They actually gave me permission for all of their fics, but I chose this one for a reason that will be explained by Chrono below).
Keep in mind however, I haven't uploaded in a while - so if there are some continuity issues - don't be afraid to point them out in reviews! I hope there aren't however, since this chapter should be less serious than the last one. Also, point out any spelling mistakes I may have made - if you want!
With all of that out of the way, it's time to get on with the last show (for now at least)!
I DO NOT OWN RWBY OR ANY OF THE SOURCES THAT I WILL HAVE THE CHARACTERS REACT TO. That being said, all of that is implied since it's fanfiction.
Beacon Beauty Standards (TITANMASTER 117)
"What type of universe will we see?" Weiss asked their host.
"The Prime Universe!"
After a few seconds, many of the people who heard Chrono's reply expressed their shock.
"THE PRIME UNIVERSE?!"
"There's a prime universe?"
"So cool!"
"So why is this universe so important?" Sun asked out loud.
"Because this is the universe where you guys are a TV show."
"Oh. That makes sense…"
"To clarify my point. What you will all see is a skit." Chrono told the audience as most had now returned back to their seats and were now ready to watch the apparent skit.
"Since we're a TV show in this prime universe, and what we're watching is a skit - then I assume we'll be seeing parody versions of ourselves then?" Oobleck deduced and asked.
Chrono nodded - the Doctor had hit the nail on the head.
"Fascinating. I'm curious to see what this universe considers to be funny about our universe?"
"What do you mean, Prof-I mean… Doctor Oobleck?" Jaune asked.
"Well my boy, in parodies or skits of TV shows - some aspects of the show - such as plot elements or lore - are magnified upon. Based on the viewpoints of people in that universe - some things we see as perfectly logical here - might be viewed as nonsensical over there."
There were many audible 'ahs' and 'ohs' and 'now I get it' and 'that makes sense' throughout the cinema.
With the people understanding the viewing, Chrono had it begin.
The screen turned to life to show two people inside what appeared to be a dormitory in Beacon. One of them was evidently Lie Ren, but the other looked like an older man who was wearing a blonde wig - trying to pass himself off as Jaune Arc.
Nora's eyes widened at the fake Ren and began to get excited.
"Look Ren! It's you!" She said, as she shook Ren whilst pointing at the screen.
"I can see him, Nora."
Meanwhile, Jaune was getting teased by Yang.
"Oh wow, Vomit Boy, I had no idea you were wearing a wig the entire time!"
Jaune groaned. "Why am I the one who's being parodied?!"
"Hey Ren?"
"Yes Jaune?"
"Why are all of the women in this school so hot?"
Many of the female huntresses-in-training's eyes widened upon hearing that statement.
Some of the more shy students, like Pyrrha, Velvet and Ruby, felt their cheeks heat up.
Jaune was mortified to hear himself (even in a parody) say something like that. "I don't think that!" He said without thinking.
Yang narrowed her on him - as did many of the female students. "What is THAT supposed to mean?" She asked.
"No, um, I meant, that, uh, you girls are beautif-, I mean very pretty - but I don't see you guys like that."
Many were confused.
"I mean that I see you guys as friends, not as…eye candy?"
"...eye candy?" Mercury asked in amusement, seeing the blonde huntsman struggling to say what he wanted to say.
"I don't see you guys are just pretty faces, okay?" Jaune clarified.
"I understand what you mean, Jaune," Pyrrha replied, with a smile.
Ren looked up from his book, blinked, and then looked over to Jaune, sitting on his bed with an earnest expression on his face, and asked, "What?"
"Like, you know, all of the women in this school. They're hot. Even Miss Goodwitch", he paused, and then rubbed his chin, "I mean, especially Miss Goodwitch..."
"I-"
"Mr Arc, you don't need to explain what a parody version of yourself is saying. It was unnecessary a moment ago, and it's unnecessary now" Ms Goodwitch said to Jaune. She looked very composed, but if a person were to look closer - her cheeks were slightly flushed. She may have been aware of the fantasies that some of her students had, but it was awkward nonetheless.
Ren arched an eyebrow, "Your point?"
"Yeah, why are they all so hot?"
"...As in attractive?"
"Well, for lack of a subtler understanding of it, yes."
Roman rolled his eyes. "Wow, thanks for clearing it up."
The R in JNPR blinked again, and then asked, "May I ask as to what spurs this question?"
"Oh, sure, go ahead."
"..."
A few chuckles were heard, as well as a few jokes.
"My goodness, blondie, are you this dense as well?"
"Considering the fact that he felt the need to clear up something obvious earlier - I'd say so!"
Some of the villains had begun to gang up on poor Jaune.
Jaune glowered. "Hey come on! No need to be mean!" He said.
"Yeah, that's enough!" Ruby said, coming up to Jaune's defense.
"Besides, it's probably just played up for laughs." Blake said.
"What, Jaune's supposed idiocy? What's so funny about that? Him not knowing certain social cues?" Weiss scoffed.
"Oh wait, you mean- Ah, right", he rubbed the back of his head, "Well, I was just thinking back to before I got on the airship to Beacon-"
"The one in which you threw up on Yang's shoes?"
"Oh, no, that was before- Wait, how did you know about that?"
"Yang."
"I still haven't gotten fully over that, vomit boy…" Yang said, narrowing her eyes on him.
"Again, I'm really sorry Yang," Jaune apologized.
Yang sighed. "I won't ask you to not vomit if you have motion sickness - but maybe get some pills for it, or at least aim into a bin, you know?"
"Ah, right", Ren gestured to him to continue, "Right, well, I was just thinking back to before I got onto the airship, and I had to ask the flight attendant there if that was actually the airship to Beacon?"
"And why is that?"
"Because I thought that it was an airship to a school of supermodels."
"Ah, I see."
"Oh? Ren sees it too?" Neptune asked, smirking at Nora's partner.
Ren did not entertain him.
"Did you really ask that?" Sun asked his fellow blonde huntsman.
"No! I know what huntsmen are!" Jaune exclaimed.
"I assume this is what the prime universe finds funny or amusing about the academies." Ozpin surmised.
"Yep. The skit points out how many women in the academy look very good."
"But that doesn't even make sense, sir." Penny said. "I see a lot of other girls outside the academies who look around the same. And even all over Vale!" [1]
"Maybe all of Remnant is just full of supermodels then." Ruby said.
"Ren", Jaune's face grew serious, which was amusing because he was talking about a not so serious subject, "Seriously, have you noticed how all of the women in this school are supermodels?"
"Hm..."
"I mean, like, seriously, don't tell me you haven't noticed how all of the outfits that the girls wear seemed to be specifically designed to express their feminine features, like their hips and butts and stuff."
"Ruby's doesn't."
"Ren, it's Ruby."
Ren nodded. Point taken.
"And I'm glad for that!" Yang said, hugging Ruby very tightly.
"Yaaang! Let me go!" Ruby said, growing mortified by the public display of hugging.
Many of the students in Beacon looked on in amusement.
"Hm...", strangely enough, what he was saying made sense. A lot of sense, now that he thought about it. Aside from Nora, he had never really paid attention to the feminine aspects of the women around him, but now that he really gave it some thought, "Now that I think about it, a lot of the women around us are exceedingly attractive."
"Exactly! Why is that? I mean, with Pyrrha, I can understand, since she's apparently a celebrity or something, or- Or whatever, but why everybody else? I mean, there's Nora- Okay, okay, I'll back off", he held his hands up in surrender at Ren's sudden glare, "Okay, but then there's Yang, which practically hugs her and shows off her chest, thighs, and waist, and then there's Coco, with her fashionista look, and then there's Velvet, what with her cuteness personified look, and then there's Blake, to which I needn't say anymore."
Ren nodded in turn. Just everything about Blake's attire oozed sexuality, so much so that just saying her name gave you enough of a mental image to work with.
The girls mentioned by Ren and Jaune had reactions. Blake, Pyrrha, and Velvet all flushed - whilst Coco and Yang looked like they were aware of what they were saying.
Nora looked shocked at Ren's glare - and some hope blossomed in her chest. Does he actually like me? Oh who I am kidding…he probably just sees me as a sister…
"What do you mean by oozing sexuality?!" Blake screamed, pointing at Ren.
Before Ren could answer, Mercury decided to speak up. "I mean he is right. You kinda dress up like a stripper."
If looks could kill, Mercury would be dead twice over. Blake glowered at him, but Mercury just laughed it off since her cheeks were as red as Ruby's cloak.
"Hey! Don't call him a stripper you bastard!" Yang said.
"It's," Mercury said in between laughs, "true though!"
As Yang and many others looked like they were going to fight Mercury - Emerald just looked at the assassin in annoyance. What an idiot! He's blowing our cover!
"My point is, is that even the lesser hot girls in this academy, are still able to beat out a traditional supermodel on an average Tuesday!" Jaune threw up his hands in exasperation at it all, "I mean, you know, I don't think I've seen one less than average, or even one average attractive woman in this entire school! Like, seriously, is that another part of a Huntress' training: That they need to be super hot models?"
Ren paused. That... Might actually be possible.
Snickers came from the part of the audience that weren't currently pissed off at Mercury.
"It's cute that the prime universe thinks that the students look like supermodels." Qrow said.
"Well, we can't really say anything about their looks - since it'd be weird." Taiyang replied.
"That's true too."
"And another thing!" Jaune threw up a finger in exclamation, "Why aren't there any traces of muscle on these women?"
"...Come again?"
"Like, you've seen Nora, right?"
"Right?"
"Is she like, really buff under that skirt or something?"
Nora blushed.
"I'm not answering that". Ren said.
"In all seriousness though - all of this can be explained. The 'no muscles' is due to aura," Neptune said.
"That is true. But this skit is meant to be comedic - facts are second to laughs in this case."
"...Do I have to answer this question?"
"Er, no, it was- It was meant to be rhetorical", Jaune coughed awkwardly, "Sorry", and then recovered herself and went, "But if you did answer that question, then the answer would be 'No', because I do not see a trace of muscle on her! She wields that giant hammer around for fun, and yet her arms look like twigs! She should be built like a brickhouse!"
Ren invoked that image in his head, and then banished it before his blood could rush to his nose.
"Why did Ren get a nosebleed?" Penny asked, confused.
"It's a common trope in anime. It basically happens whenever a person finds another person attractive." Jaune answered, since he was knowledgeable on that subject. [2]
"Huh. Does that mean Ren finds Nora attractive?" Penny surmised.
Nora heard what Penny said and her eyes widened as she went to look at Ren and gauge his reaction.
Ren's face was devoid of color. I'm so glad I can still use my semblance…
Nora, knowing of his semblance, was disheartened. He used his semblance, which must mean that doesn't want to show his emotion. Does he not want me to know that he might like me?
Meanwhile, Penny was asked Jaune more questions. "How does that make sense though? What happens if the character loses too much blood? Is it meant to be humorous? If so, why is it considered funny?"
"Um, Penny - even I don't know why. I just know it's a trope." Jaune replied.
"And shouldn't Yang's arms be really muscular as well? Because she's a brawler. Her arms should be covered in muscle, and she should have a 6-pack on her waist! But do you see one?"
"...No?"
"Exactly!"
"Hey! I have a six pack!" Yang said, offended.
Ren thought about this, and realised that Jaune raised another point. Why did none of the girls here have any muscle on them? Coco's minigun folded into her purse, so for her to be able to carry all of that mass pressed into a small purse meant that she must have incredible upper body strength, and yet, there was not a hint of visible muscle on her, despite the fact that her arms should be covered in muscles. Hell, even Ruby should have muscles on her, considering that she wields a weapon such as Crescent Rose all of the time, and yet he was certain that he could pick her up and wave her around no problem.
"Again…that's because of our aura," Adam said. This skit was becoming tiresome for him to watch now.
"And then!" Jaune continued, "On top of that, why does nobody else here wear armour!?"
"...Come again... Again?"
"Like, c'mon", Jaune sighed out, "No one else here is wearing armour."
"Armour?"
"Like, y'know, this stuff", he tapped his armoured chest, "The stuff that stops you from getting shot. Or stabbed, and stuff. I mean, it's like they think that they're not going to get shot to stabbed sometime in their career! They're Huntsmen and Huntresses for gods' sake, not supermodels! You'd think that they'd have at least Kevlar underneath their outfits or something."
"Why have armor when aura is better?" Ruby asked.
"Well, we do have aura, Jaune."
"Exactly!"
"Yeah, but that isn't going to protect us all of the time! I mean, I'm the only one out of the 8 of us in JNPR and RWBY that wears armour! I mean, so does Team CRDL, I guess, but they're not exactly the best examples, so... Yeah."
"Jaune, you're not even wearing a full set."
"At least it's better than nothing."
"Actually, he does make a good point," Ironwood said, "that's why the soldiers in Atlas all wear armor. There is nothing wrong with having too much defense."
"That being said, that is this kevlar?" Ozpin asked.
"Kevlar is a heat-resistant and strong synthetic fiber that is also bullet and ballistic resistant. It is also used to stop knives, and is used by armies in the world - of the prime universe of course."
"Interesting. Is there a way to replicate this in Remnant?" the headmaster of Atlas asked. [3]
Not warning to explain it all, Chrono just gave him a pamphlet - which Ironwood accepted with gratitude.
"Hm", he supposed that he had a point. Still though, "I think it's all about different fighting styles, I suppose. If I wore armour, then it would probably weigh me down, since I'm a fast paced attacker."
"That is a good point as well." Ozpin said.
"Kevlar can help with that I assume." Ironwood replied, holding up the pamphlet.
"Then get Kevlar", Ren gave him a look, "Or at least something lightweight... Just saying, I'd rather not you get shot and die at some point", he plopped down into his seat, "Dang it why do all of the girls wear such impractical outfits..."
Ren moved back to reading his book, "Maybe you should ask them."
"Ha, nope. One time I asked my older sister Saphron about her outfits, and she threatened to punt me across the room if I did so ever again. All I asked was why she wore such a short skirt. I still don't know what I did wrong."
"Huh. That's actually kinda accurate." Jaune said. "Minus the threat, she just glared at me and told me to leave."
Ren shook his head, "Women are a strange beast onto themselves, Jaune."
"Of course there's a comment like that in these skits." Weiss said, rolling her eyes. Many of the other women did the same.
His team leader sighed, "True, true", he rubbed his head, and then came out with, "I'm just saying, one of these days, a Huntsman or Huntress or Hunter or whatever is going to come across us, take one look at our outfits, and think that we're all supermodels and not Huntsmen and Huntresses."
Ren smiled, "Well, I'm sure that will never happen."
"Let me guess…" Watts said, "that's gonna happen in the next scene?"
The scene then changed to Ren and Jaune walking outside Beacon, with the rest of Team JNPR and Team RWBY.
Like Ren, all of them looked older than the real versions of themselves - and they were wearing poorly-fitting wigs, and cheap cosplay outfits. [4]
Many in the audience found the costumes hilarious. Roman was laughing loudly, Mercury was chuckling, Cinder found herself smiling in amusement - Qrow and Tai were guffawing - the only people not laughing - were RWBY and JNPR themselves.
"Oh come on - why is hair not that long!" Yang whined - seeing her parody version have hair that goes down all the way to the floor.
"Why am I barely wearing anything?" Blake screamed.
"Oh my goodness! That is hilarious to see, especially Red!" Roman exclaimed through his laughter.
Ruby was mortified to see herself on the screen - it was a child wearing a red cape, and having a gardening scythe by her side - it wasn't even a model!
"I thought they were supposed to be models?" Qrow asked in amusement.
"Well, they embellished some parts, and made Ruby a kid - but other than that, they look similar." Tai said. "The guys mentioned earlier that Ruby was an exception too."
"Alright then, Huntsmen and- Er, where are all of the Huntsmen and Huntresses?"
That voice came from a short man wearing the armor of a knight, who was walking alongside a taller woman who was wearing chainmail and a viking's helmet. The man wielded a shortsword, whilst the woman had an ax. [5]
"THEY DON'T EVEN LOOK LIKE HUNTSMEN AND HUNTESSES! THEY LOOK LIKE LARPERS!" Sun said out loud before breaking into laughter.
Team RWBY and JNPR looked over each other, and then one of them said, "Here."
The Huntsman and Huntress before them, both of them completely covered in full sets of armour, looked to each other, and then looked back, "Where?"
"In front of you!"
"I don't see any Huntsmen and Huntresses, I just- Oh, no wait, there's one. There's one right there, he's got armour on", the Huntsman then patted Jaune on the shoulder, and said, "C'mon, kid, let's go kill some Grimm!"
"Oh, cool."
Weiss snorted. "I guess looks can be deceiving."
The Huntsman began to lead Jaune away, and the rest of RWBY and JNPR began to follow, but the armoured Huntress stopped them and pointed a thumb in the opposite direction, "Hey, the fashion show is that way!"
"Excuse me?" Weiss asked.
"You heard me, lady. This is no place for civilians, much less supermodels."
"Hey, we're not supermodels!" Yang called out in indignation, "We might look like supermodels, but we're Huntresses like-"
"Oh goddammit, all of the goddamn time- You're not even wearing any armour! You're not wearing anything to stop you from getting stabbed or shot! Why is it that you supermodels are always trying to join us!? Is there like a dare going on or something?"
"Well we have to wear these clothes!" Pyrrha said in her defense. "One of the reasons we look like this is so people immediately that we're huntresses and huntsmen."[6]
"We know Pyrrha - but I don't think screaming at the screen will let the people who made the skit know." Ren said.
"You have to dress up like a stripper?" Mercury asked Blake.
"Not. Like. A. Stripper." Blake said. "I dress like this because it's open and allows for movement! Is that so hard to understand?"
"I bet your crazy ex gave you that because he liked it." Mercury said, smirking.
Blake went wide eyed, whilst Adam narrowed his eyes at Mercury. What a bad joke. If I gave her that, then she wouldn't be wearing it anymore. Actually…she shouldn't be wearing it at all - it's the same damn outfit she wore when we attacked that train. [7]
"Hey, we are Huntresses-"
"And Huntsmen", Ren added.
"-As much as you!" Ruby protested, "And we are going with you, wherever you like it or not!"
"Yeah! You tell them kid Ruby!" Cardin mockingly said. He and his team's laughter were interrupted by Yang throwing something at them (and it phased through them since attacks were not allowed in the cinema).
The Huntress then looked at them, quirked an eyebrow, and then turned to the side, "Security!"
And then the 7 of them were punted off of the premises.
"And stay out! Freakin' supermodels, all of the goddamn time..."
Yang looked up off of the floor, and then blinked, "Did- Did we just get cockblocked from killing Grimm?"
Huh, Ren thought to himself, I guess it did happen after all…
The screen then went to black with the words on the screen being "Don't pretend that you haven't thought about it…"
"And that's it for the skit! What did you guys think about it?" Chrono announced.
As expected, the reactions were mixed.
"That was a horrible skit! It just tried to objectify us!" Blake exclaimed, being on the side that dislikes the skit.
"That was hilarious!" Mercury said, being on the side that likes the skit.
"I thought it was interesting to see what aspects of the show were focused on in a comedic manner. Even if I did not find the humor myself." Oobleck announced, showing a very nuanced take.
Not feeling interested in voicing out his opinion, Ironwood was looking at the pamphlet that provided instructions on how to create Kevlar.
"The production of Kevlar fibers is similar to the production of nylon. The first step in the production process is to produce the basic chemical…" [8]
This is very complicated. Ironwood thought to himself. Luckily, Atlas science is the best in the world. Hopefully they can make this. [9]
As the students and younger people (plus Oobleck and Port) felt the need to voice their opinions, Salem was thinking about the skit and what it told her. She knew that at the end of the day, it was just comedy - but what the others, specifically the Nikos girl, said in defense of their outfits were interesting.
Salem knew that the huntsmen and huntresses were supposed to be heroes - but she never really considered the idea that their outfits were meant to convey that too. Sure, she knew about the color rule and the need for individuality - but she assumed that it was just Ozma speaking nonsense and drivel once again - like he did all those millennia ago. Perhaps she should learn more about the modern Remnant. She seemed out of touch. It's like not she didn't have any time to lose after all. She had all the time in the world.
Ozpin took a glance at Salem and narrowed his eyes when she saw her in thought. She's plotting something. He concluded. What could she possibly gain from this skit, however?
Chrono saw both of their thoughts are just laughed inwards. Ever paranoid, huh, Oz? He thought, not that he didn't blame him.
With the discussion having taken a few minutes, Chrono decided that enough time had passed, especially when he saw Mercury get on the nerves of a few too many students at Beacon (and Cinder for jeopardizing their 'mission').
"Okay! Let's move on to the next universe!" He announced to the audience.
And that was the reaction for "Beacon Beauty Standards" by Titanmaster 117! Hopefully I did okay for my first chapter in months! I felt that I struggled to make good reactions early in the chapter but got better towards the middle and end.
I just want to clarify something (just in case) - I actually found this fic (Beacon) to be funny, but I felt that certain characters would be unamused - and I want to show them not finding it funny. That doesn't mean I found it unfunny though and had characters say that - I just wanted them to be in-character. Once again, thank you Titanmaster 117 for your permission!
[1] - What I'm referring to here is how the models in the series actually make a lot of the people look the same. If you rewatch Volume 7 or Volume 6 - Saphron (Jaune's sister who is not a huntress) and the mothers that Jaune helps (who aren't huntresses too of course) look the same - and have similar faces to RWBY.
[2] - In a lot of fics, Jaune always seems to know about stuff like anime and comics. I don't know if this is fanon (or just the author self-inserting into him) - or if he actually like that stuff (like X-Ray and Vav), but I figured he'd be best suited to tell Penny about it - compared to having Chrono do it all over again.
[3] - I don't remember Kevlar being mentioned in the series - so I assumed it did not exist in Remnant. Maybe they have other alternatives (outside of aura).
[4] - Added this part of the transcript to make it look more like a skit. Not part of the actual fic.
[5] - Added this part of the transcript to make it look more like a skit. Not part of the actual fic.
[6] - I assumed that they dressed like that the same way superheroes dressed up - they differentiate themselves and make themselves visible.
[7] - Just a plot that I noticed (and a lot of people also tend to point out in their fics).
[8] - I just searched up "How to make Kevlar" and copy and pasted some random article. Of course, the actual process is not openly available online since it's a military thing, but that's why I just added a small sentence or two.
[9] - OMG Is that a JoJo Reference? Yes it is! "German science is the best in the world" - Von Stroheim. Part 2 was a great JoJo and it hooked me into the series. Caesar dying only 8 episodes in was so shocking to me though. That death literally made me so sad. Sorry for spoilers if you're reading this and trying to get into JoJo. It's been out for years though. Do I add a SPOILER ALERT?
AND NOW TO ANSWER SOME QUESTIONS/SUGGESTIONS FROM REVIEWS:
A Guest: I would love to do a reaction on Moon Knight. And Ozma/Ozpin/Oscar could work very well for that. Especially since I do not believe that I've fully tangled with the plot point of Ozpin having to reveal his past yet.
UcupJelek135: Linkin Park…that brings back memories. I'd love to have them react to songs from Meteora and Hybrid Theory! But I'd probably do it after I do a few more reaction chapters of other universes first. They did just get out of the music room after all.
The Avenging Titan: Attack on Titan would be so interesting for them to react to. I just haven't been able to watch it. One scene I love is the one where Reiner and Eren reunite however. If I do AOT, I might show the major scenes between them - such as Reiner revealing himself as a Titan, and then Eren reuniting with him.
Zekken182: YES! Arcane is amazing! I immediately thought of the Vi and Jinx/Yang and Ruby connection as well! I definitely want to do a chapter focusing on that. It'll either be focused on Vi and Jinx (so Ruby and Yang can compare) or Jayce (since he looks so much like Ironwood IMO).
See you guys next time!
NEXT CHAPTER: A Breath of the Wild (LEGEND OF ZELDA)