When I returned

by Linneagb

Seven years after being there the last time, Emma Peterson returns to the dumping ground. To find that Mike is still there. But tdg is a whole other place than before with all new people. But still, with the crying, the laughing, the anger and happiness. And most of all the love- Elm Tree House never really changed. Syoc. Closed

5. Not about feelings

Camogirl14: Aw, thank you. I'm so happy you liked it. Yeah, I ususally work at several chapters at once so one chapter can take like weeks if they're long ones. But that's the way u-huh u- huh I like it. (It's past midnight. I'm hyper, okay? Or I'm just being my usual not- too- normal- self) I'm happy I wrote Violet right. I always try and do my best to do so as I know how disappointing it is when they can't. So I'm so happy you felt that I was writing Violet right. She was very interesting to write for that matter and very different from the others. Thanks for reading and reviewing. See ya!

X snow- pony x: YAY. Thank you. I'm so happy that you liked it and that I'm writing her character right. Yep. That's what that cliffhanger was for. But here comes more. I hope you like this chapter too and am pretty sure you will as Emily is introduced here. Thanks for reading and reviewing. See ya!

XQueen- Of- Applesx: I'm so, so happy I wrote Brielle right. That's what I always try to do so it makes me very happy when I succeed. Anyway, it's not strange that you like Violet. She's a very interesting character and different from the others. I enjoy writing her too. Thanks for reading and reviewing. See ya!

Anyway, on the polyvore. I decided to delete all my edits with outfits, clothes and rooms. So many of the edits for this story has been deleted. Don't ask me why I did it I just simply felt that would be the best option. So yeah, here comes the chapter. I hope you like it.

"So wait." When Mike had finished telling Nathan and Qwyn what he had been told happened to Mr. And Mrs. Lord and the twins' little sisters Qwyn was the first one to come out of his chock enough to answer. "Have I gotten all of this right? Mum's dead?"

"Yes."

I decided to stay out of it. Mike new both the story and the twins better than what I did so I just let him answer.

"And Minnie's dead?"

"Yes"

"Because dad killed them?"

"Yes."

"And he's in prison?"

"Yes."

"And he stabbed Emily too?"

"Yes"

"But she survived?"

"Yes"

"And she's on her way here right now?"

"Yes?"

"How long until she'll be here?"

Mike looked to his watch and counted. "In about two hours." He looked up at Nathan and Qwyn who both sat on the edge of Nathan's bed and seemed so chocked none of them knew what to say. And everything we heard- since we couldn't hear the chattering from downstairs from here was a few coughs from Nathan until he suddenly seemed all panicking and looked around breathing heavily.

"I feel sick"

I looked around for a bin, but even before I had had the time to do anything Mike had rushed over the floor, grabbed a bin and placed it in front of Nathan's feet while Nathan's breaths went even shorter and hoarser and Qwyn gave him a breathing mask leading to a machine that stood on the shared bedside table.

"It's okay Nate." As it seemed like Nathan could barely even catch his breath and also coughed several times with every breath Qwyn patted his back and talked in such a comforting way I wouldn't have really thought he could at all. "Mike… You want to." Qwyn covered his mouth with his arm when he coughed himself and reached for an inhaler and nodded towards me.

I was mostly confused. What was going on? An inhaler I could understand but Nathan's seemed worse. Was he like dying right in front of me or…

"It's alright. Ehrm… I will come and get you two when she's not too far away. Come with me Emma." I wasn't so sure whether we should leave the boys on their own with this. "They can do this on their own. I think we need to give them some privacy." Mike more or less pulled me up onto my feet and down the stairs. "Believe me," he didn't say anything before he closed the door behind us. "I know these twins. I think they would like to be alone in this. And they've got each other."

"And…" I was meaning to ask what it was with Nathan but Mike raised his hand to silent me.

"Nathan and Qwyn have both got asthma. Non- allergic. It can be triggered by strong feelings. Or cold air, running and pushing oneself to hard in sports. Or cigarette smoke or perfume. Such things. Nathan's is worse than Qwyn's. But they can both treat it very well on their own. For Nathan that oxygen mask sometimes work better than an inhaler. Don't worry about it, he'll be okay in a few minutes. So who were you going to next? Did I hear something about Ashton?"

"Ehrm, yes. But I think I should know… Ehrm… So Nathan and Qwyn has non- allergic asthma. Is there some other disabilities or diseases? Allergies? Anything like that." Mike scratched his neck. "Memory failing you on elder days?" Mike sighed and grimaced jokingly at me.

"I'm actually only fifty four. Anyways, yes. Violet has asthma too." I moaned. "Yes, you could probably imagine what she's like if she has an attack. She's allergic though. She's allergic to mite, which pretty much means that we leave the window in her room opened and wash her sheets and things a bit more often than the others. Marley's allergic to like a thousand different things. I don't keep it all in my head but what is most important is that she's so allergic to fish and other kinds of seafood. If we had it on the bench or the table we need to really wash it off and we can't use a spoon in it that she later uses to eat with and so on. She gets anaphylactic chocks from that and from getting stung by bees. There is a shot in the locker in the office, one on the desk in her room and one in a locker in the kitchen. There's also a list of all she's allergic to and what it does. And David and Violet's allergies. David… Do you know who that is?" I shook my head. "Small guy with short, dark hair?"

"Oh, yeah. I saw him earlier."

"He's allergic to caffeine. But he 'only' gets a rash. So if he'd eat a chocolate or something he won't die from it so to speak. I think that's all with the allergies and asthma. Brielle gets anemic. You know, low blood counts. She goes to the hospital and gets blood transfusions in the beginning of every month. So towards the end of the month, even though we try to have her eat much of liverwurst and black pudding and stuff she gets tired and dizzy and out of her breath and stuff. Therefore. At the end of the month we prefer for someone to walk right next to her if she's walking in the stairs. Just in case. And I think that's it. I know that you haven't had a seizure in years but you're not allergic to anything are you. I remember you weren't the last time you were here."

"Ehrm. You might or might not believe me but a few years ago I suddenly started getting nauseas and stuff. And… It turned out at last I'm allergic to cheese. Nope, nothing else then cheese. Usual cheese like the one you have on a sandwich or on a pizza or something is fine. But creamed cheese or stuff like halloumi or all green or blue cheese is not. I had one portion of halloumi- whatever a few months ago and I was nauseas for a week." Mike first frowned then chuckled slightly. "You don't believe me, do you?"

"Oh yes. I believe you. But it's weird. Very weird. And you do know that if it just that you don't like che…"

"I love cheese. And at first it was only cream cheese and then I tried that green all moldy cheese. And then I was nauseas for like a week. And then I ate that halloumi and yeah… Now I'm very careful with what kinds of cheeses I eat. Believe me. I think it's just as weird as you think it is. And very annoying. Since I love cheese." Mike just smiled and shook his head slightly. "Maybe I should just continue walking around until their sister gets here. Where does Ashton live?" Mike pointed. "Okay, thanks. See ya."

"See you."

I knocked on the door that Mike had pointed to and heard a slight "Come in" from inside. And I'm not so sure what I had expected. I knew Ashton could be a girls' name and I'd heard Qwyn say 'she' but was still kind of chocked when I heard the female voice from inside and opened the door and found a girl dressed in jeans, a red tank top with some white text on and a black beanie with the text 'bad hair day'

"Hi. I'm Ashton. And you can close your mouth. I know that when you heard the name you thought I was a boy." I tried to stutter some excuse that sounded lame even to me. "Don't worry about it. You're not the first. And what would I expect with my new haircut." She pulled her beanie off to show off with a short and choppy and not less uneven blonde thatch. "Qwyn dared me. Oh well…" She shrugged. "It'll grow back and until it have Qwyn will be grounded for daring the new girl." She looked around the room to the blue and grey walls and all of her things packed up in bags and boxes. "So new they haven't had the time to make my room mine yet. But well… I guess it will happen sooner or later. And until then this beanie will really suit me." She pulled it back on and I looked around the room again to spot that there were bags of sour patch kids placed both a bit of here and a bit of there.

"Do you want some sour patch kids?" She held up the bag she had next to her towards me and I held out my hand and let her tip it over so one blue and one red candy fell down into my hand. "You were from Sweden right? Do you have sour patch kids over there?"

"Yes and no. But we have other kinds of candy and…" I put the red piece in my mouth and chewed it. "And I think I'll go with those ones if I can choose. These are good but…." I shook my head. "…I know better. I brought some candy from Sweden. I'll take it here tomorrow. You can try it then." Ashton smiled and nodded. "So… What do I need to know about you except that your name is Ashton and you like candy?" I put the second candy in my mouth and chewed. "Mhm. This one was better."

"Well… As you know my name's Ashton. I'm fourteen years old. I've been in care all my life. No I don't know why but I've only been here in Elm Tree House for two weeks. Don't ask me why I've moved- again! I don't really want to talk about it. I really like sour patch kids. Actually I like all candy… I think I'm addicted to sugar… nah… I'm actually mostly like a hundred and fifteen percent sure I'm addicted to sugar. And… I guess that's kind of everything actually."

"Okay. So can you answer a question. Yes? Okay, I'm trying to get a picture of who are friends and who are not. So if you'd choose one favorite person in this house. Who would you choose?" Ashton hesitated. "I know you haven't been here for long. But maybe you could have a tiny little best friend in here."

"I like Qwyn. He's pretty awesome. And since he's gay it's not all of that. Wow, are you two dating? Are you in love? Crap so. Yeah, hanging out with him is pretty damn awesome. Have someone chosen me as their favorite person?" I hesitated about if I should tell you or not. "Okay, someone did. I can see it on the look on your face. Don't worry. I don't need to know who it is." I smiled and tried to find something else in the room to talk about.

"So, what are you reading?"

"Ehrm. One child by… Torey Hayden." I nodded. I must have read that book at least a thousand times and it was one of my very favorite books. "Nathan loves all of her books and is constantly reading them and talking about how great they are so I decided to try it. And I don't think it's good but the problem is I can't put the thing down because I just need to know what happens next." I smiled- yep. That had been me the first time I read it to. I didn't actually understand how anyone could not like Torey Hayden's books.

"Well, I've read pretty much every book that she's ever written in both English and Swedish. And that one's my favorite… No wait, that would be the sequel to it- the tiger's child. No Murphy's boy. No ghost girl but that one's so terrible. No somebody else's kids and yeah you see where this is going." Ashton only smiled and shook her head at me. "So, is there something else I would need to know about you?" Ashton leaned her head to the side as if she wondered deeply about something and then leaned it to the other side.

"No. Not anything that I can think of."

"So whose room do you think do you think I should go into next?"

"You should go into… I don't know like… Wheezy's room next. Unless he's out running again."

"Been there, done that."

"Tracie and Ella's?"

"Been there."

"Marley's?"

"Been there too."

"Okay, how about Marty then."

"I haven't been into his room yet so… thank you." I backed towards the door. "And if you need me to know anything or you need to know anything else about me then just shout or something and I'll be right here… That will say as soon as I found the right room. Maybe I should use the post- its I put on every door and write who lives where and keep them there until I've learnt who lives where." I smiled slightly and Ashton laughed shortly.

"Don't worry about it. You'll learn quickly."

"I know… I've been here before, remember?"

"Oh yeah right. Well. See ya."

Ashton returned to her Torey- Hayden book and I left the room but went straight back into the room. "Can you show me which room is Marty's?" Ashton laughed slightly again and showed me out of the room and to Marty's room. "Okay, thanks. I can do it myself from here. Although. Can you put this on your door?" I handed her a post- it and she went back to her room while I knocked on Marty's door.

"Come in."

I stepped in and found a room that almost made me dizzy with the prints of different magazines of superheroes and such on the wallpaper. And in the room Marty laid on a hammock with a Harry Potter book, a cover and two pillows put on it as a bed and smiled up at me.

"Hey, we've met before but I can tell you again so you don't forget. I'm Marty." He looked around. "And this is my room. I like magazines, superheroes. Harry Potter and things. But I hate math. And I hate that Mike keeps on taking my money. I'd like to spend it all on magazines and candy, loads of candy. I also like skateboards and burgers. But not together. And big bang theory. So… is that everything you need to know about me?" I hesitated.

"Well… I'm trying to get a picture of who are friends and not. So if you can choose one favorite person of all of those who live and work here. Who would you say?" Marty thought for a moment, and then smiled slightly.

"Tracie's pretty awesome. We play hide and seek every once in a while and that is great. And I and Luce help her to learn how to ride a bike and that's great fun too." Marty smiled again. "Anything else you need to know? Because I'm not going to tell you why I'm put into care. And it doesn't matter how much you want me to. I'm still not going to."

I smiled slightly. It hadn't even crossed my mind to ask the ones here why they were put in the foster-care- system. That just felt to me like a very private things that I- not even as a care worker should ask them about. And instead wait and get to know them and then they could tell me if they wanted me to and not else.

"I don't think I've got too many rooms left. So if I just ask you who I should go to next as with the others before you we might end up where I was with Ashton and she said one name after the other but I'd already been there. So, can you come with me out in the hallway? The doors to the rooms I've already been in have post it-s on them. So you can show me which room I should go into next since you know who lives in what room and I don't" Marty nodded and threw his book down onto the floor before he jumped down onto the floor and walked before me out of his room.

"You should go in there next." He pointed to a door and I just noted that it didn't have a post it on it before I walked over to it. Just as I laid my hand on the handle it hit me that at least the last time I had been here it was the toy cupboard. Oh well- the attic was made into a room so why not tear down a wall or three and…

…It was still the toy cupboard! As soon as I had opened the door I was hit by shelves from floor to ceiling filled with toys and games of all of the kinds they were. And I had to admit that I was actually kind of happy to see at least this was partly the same. And the dumping ground hadn't gone all laptops and smartphones and everything else there was like the rest of the world. Even though I just had the time to note that before I heard Marty choke with laughter behind me and I closed the door and left the cupboard again.

"Haha." I stated ironically at the young Hispanic. "Very funny. Now, can you tell me who I actually should go in to next?" Marty just laughed so it took a while before he could answer. "And no more pranks. After this day you know I'm kind of your boss." Marty just grimaced at me. "So can you show me some door where there actually lives someone?" Marty just laughed and showed me to a door. And I knocked it first to check if there was someone in there.

"Come in."

"Thank you Marty." I opened the door and Marty disappeared out of my sight when he turned in the other direction and I walked into a room where everything- absolutely everything seemed to be in light pink and light blue. And on the bed- a perfect princess bed painted in silver with pink covers. There sat a small girl, perhaps five or six. With brown skin and curly dark hair.

"Hi." She greeted me with a big toothless smile. "I'm Peityn"

"Well hello." I greeted back and couldn't help but smile. "So, what gives the dumping ground the pleasure for this Princess?" Peityn laughed so she almost choke and I gestured to a chair. "May I sit down? Your highness?" Peityn gave me another toothless, sparkling smile and nodded and I sat down and right away it rolled backwards. "Whoa." I hit my feet down towards the floor to stop it. "It was wheels on that one." Peityn started giggling again. This time so bad she fell backwards towards her bed and couldn't sit up again until she had stopped laughing. "So, may I call you Peityn madam?" Peityn nodded again. "Okay, so Peityn. What would you want to tell me about you?"

"What do you need to know about me?"

"What sort of things you like? And what you like doing? And I'd also like you to choose one favorite person in this house. Including everyone who lives here and Mike, Luce, George and I. Can you do that?" Peityn nodded and then came over to me. And like Ella had done just a while ago she threw her arms around my waist and embraced me smiling.

"My favorite person in this house is you Emma." She continued smiling and didn't let go of me while saying her first sentence. And then let go of me and crawled up to sit on my lap and reached for a tress of my hair. "And I like your hair. It's really pretty. I wish I was pretty like you." I couldn't help but smile and was meaning to reassure her she was pretty. But she continued before I had the time. "I like being here at the dumping ground. There are so many nice people here and I love Mike, and Luce, and George and everybody who lives here. I also like candy floss and hair bows. But I do not like my parents. They are in prison because they used to hurt me." Peityn's smile and sparling eyes had turned into a pout and tears glittering in her brown eyes and I lifted the hand I wasn't holding onto her with and wiped the tears away with my sleeve.

"Oh, it's okay sweetie." I hugged her tightly towards my chest once I'd dried the tears. "They can't touch you here." I lost track of time sitting like that, and actually wasn't too sure how long we sat like that until Peityn had stopped sniveling. "Okay." At last I pulled away and lifted her down from my lap. "Do you know what? I have a small little candy floss machine at home. And everything you need to use is sugar and food coloring- just sugar and you can have it all white. I could bring it sometime… Maybe on someone's birthday…" Peityn smiled and her whole expression just lit up again. "When is your birthday?"

"Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?"

"I can hear you there young lady." We could both hear Mike's voice from the hallway. "And you know perfectly well your birthday isn't tomorrow." I forced myself not to laugh. This little thing was just too sweet, wasn't she? Then Mike appeared in the doorway and looked to me. "It's January, the second. And are you two done?" I looked to Peityn, who nodded. And then back to Mike and nodded myself. "Then I'd like to talk to you for a minute Em." I nodded and stood up, then patted Peityn's shoulder and then walked after Mike. "Sometimes it could just be better to shut up about such things. Now she probably won't shut up about it until you've actually brought it here. And I forbid you to do it before her birthday."

"Okay. Then I won't. I'm sorry." Mike smiled and patted my back before we stopped outside a door that didn't have a post it on it yet. "Oh, I forgot the post it to Peityn's door. Can you show me back to it?" Mike chuckled and led me back to the door. I placed a pink post it on it and then followed him while he continued.

"It's okay." He told me. "Just try not to do it again." I nodded. "That's my girl. Anyway. To me it seems like this one's the last room. So… I'll let you get to it." Mike gave me a one- armed hug before he turned. "Come find me when you're done okay?" I nodded and then knocked the door.

"Come in."

"Come in."

Obviously to me already before I opened the door there were two males living in this room. One a bit younger, and one perhaps in his early teenage years. But very early in that case as his voice hadn't broken yet. And while I pushed down the handle I realized these two must be David and Shawn.

"Hello boys." I greeted as I came into the room came into the room where Shawn who was the first one I had met of these kids when I came here to talk to Mike. "So you're Shawn." I pointed to the older one by the desk with a number of books opened in front of him. "And I do believe your name is David?" the younger boy nodded. "Awesome. I'm Emma and if everything works out like I should I'm going to work here. Really Shawn? Homework on a Sunday?" He just shrugged while I smirked slightly to let him know I was joking.

"Yeah I don't have much choice. Loads and loads of homework and you gotta do what you gotta do. Anyways, no one knows this place better than I do- except maybe Mike. Since there's no one here that's been here longer than what I have. Tee used to live in this room when I first came here. You knew her right?" I nodded. "Awesome. Anyway…" He looked to his papers and noted something.

I glanced around the room, these boys really seemed to like blue I had to say. One of the walls was dark blue with prints of air balloons, and the rest of the walls were painted in grey. The desk was painted in blue, so was the bed. (The only bed I could see actually) the bed had two sets of covers with different prints from children's movies or series and on both of them at least a part of the background was blue. Also the lamp was blue and David was dressed from head to toe in a blue sweater, dark grey jeans and sneakers. And on the floor stood a blue backpack. I had just noted that everything was blue when Shawn looked up again.

"Sorry, I just had to do that while I still remembered it"

"It's okay. So…" I glanced around the room and looked for another bed once again. Nope- still only one bed with two sets of pillows and covers on them. One with prints from Frozen, and one with prints from Scooby Doo. "Excuse me for asking but… Do you two share this bed?" Shawn nodded. "You don't have to tell me if it's too private but… Is there a reason why?" Shawn nodded again. "So…Why?"

"When I was new here I was afraid of sleeping on my own. So badly I needed to hold onto someone's hand when I fell asleep to feel that they wouldn't leave. It got better but while it was still that way Mike fixed this as it was okay with Shawn too. And now it's still here." I looked to Shawn to check if he had something to add. "I don't really get why I had to hold onto his hand while sleeping though. I was so childish."

"No. It's okay Dave." Shawn smiled and threw his head to get the fringe away from his face. "I know you're afraid of being alone and…" He leaned closer to me and whispered so David wouldn't hear. "…His parents died in a car crash two years ago when he was like four and a half. He wasn't and I guess still isn't really old enough to know what it means to be dead. If he'd be afraid of people leaving him like they did… It's only natural." I nodded agreeing and Shawn returned to his homework.

..."LEON. LEON. LEON." I had woken up the first night back with Leon. He had been sitting by my bed when I fell asleep- But so I had a nightmare and woke up and he wasn't there. "LEON. LEON" Don't tell me he was gone too. Please, dear God. Don't take him too. "LEON"…

"Hey." The distressed tone in Shawn's voice brought me back to here and now. "Are you alright?" I shook my head and quickly pulled myself back to reality. I was back at the dumping ground after seven years, it had been almost seven and a half since that plane crash. I wasn't in my new bedroom at Leon's, and there wasn't just a few days after my whole life had fallen into pieces.

"Yeah." I forced a smile. "I'm fine." I swallowed, which turned out to be a kind of hard thing to do as my throat had gone thick and my senses wouldn't react. "So, anyway. Can you tell me a bit more about yourself? What do you like? What do you like to do?"

"I like to eat." David interrupted. "We haven't had supper yet. Mike said you would make it today and you would choose what you wanted to make for supper. So what are we having? Or have Mike not even told you that you were making supper because you look very confused."

"Ehrm…" I played what David had just said over and over in my head until I had understood it. "No. Mike didn't tell me that. But if he want me to then I most certainly will and if we'd have everything for it how does grilled cheese sandwiches and oatsoup sound?" David smiled at the mention of grilled cheese. But seemed a bit hesitant about the soup.

"Oatsoup? Is that like oatmeal? Because I don't like oatmeal."

"No. It's not like oatmeal. And if you try it then I'm sure you'll like it. So can you tell me a bit about what sort of things you like and what you like doing? So I will get sort of an introduction of you before I start working here. You go first David."

"I like the color blue, drawing and Scooby Doo." David hesitated. "And I kind of like the dumping ground since it's like having a very big family and there's always someone who you can talk to. And always something to do. What do you like Shawn?" Shawn laid his pencil down and had a weird expression on his face spinning in the chair until he was turned to me.

"Like David just said. I also kind of like the dumping ground since it's all like being a very big family and it never gets boring. I like everybody's alike worth like the same rights for people of all sexualities, races and all of that. And I like to do things like dance in the rain and such things and act like you haven't got a care. And I also kind of like how awesome I am." I smiled. "Anything else you need to know? I really got to go back to my homework."

"Yeah. To get a picture of who here are friends. I'd like you to choose one favorite person of the people who live and work here." Shawn leaned back in his chair. "You go first Shawn so I can let you get back to that homework." He seemed to be thinking, bit his lip and scratched his forehead.

"Ella I believe. She's sweet. And the reason why I've got frozen- covers might or might not be because she's got me wrapped around her finger. She is like the only one here who doesn't constantly ask about my grades and all of that which is so great. So yeah… she's just great! But it seems like I've got someone to compete with now." He smirked towards me. "No, don't worry about it. I'll survive. What about you Dave?"

"If you keep on calling me Dave it's not going to be you at least." Shawn snorted with laughter. "No, but. Wheezy's pretty cool. You are great too Shawn. Even when you call me Dave. Which I hate." David smiled and reached for some coloring books and pencils that lied on the desk. "Is that everything you need then?" I nodded. "Okay, goodbye."

"Bye guys."

And with that, I walked out of the room that was for now and until Emily arrived. The very last one of the dumping ground's current residents had been introduced to me. While I introduced myself to them. And this I must say- was a very interesting group of kids and teenagers.

I wasn't so certain if I would look forward to this Emily coming or not. And like it would when you felt like this the time just flew by as I walked around the house and tried to remember who lived here. Made grilled cheese sandwiches and oatsoup for the afternoon supper (Which David and all the others liked by the way) and made the dishes. Until suddenly the time had gone by and Emily would soon arrive. I heard Mike fixing upstairs so I went up there. And was meaning to ask him if he needed help with something when he started talking about something else himself.

"Oh and yeah. I forgot when we were talking about illnesses and allergies and such before. But both Ella and Tracie gets car sick. They both bring a bucket with them when we are going somewhere and believe me- we have tried with everything but the best way is if they eat something before we come into the car so they aren't stuck with dry heaving since no medicines work. They usually get in the car, throw up everything they've eaten the last few hours and within ten minutes after we've gotten in the car they're both asleep. They all sit right by an adult to comfot them. Tracie wants Luce. And Ella have had George but she's now claimed that furthermore she wants you. Is that okay with you?"

"Yeah. Sure."

I couldn't stand vomit! Seeing, hearing or even smelling someone vomiting made me want to throw up myself. But one thing I knew I would just have to learn if I would be working here is that it didn't matter what I felt. As long as I was there for the children. So I just fought the feelings away and decided that I was going to get used to it somehow. And so Mike's voice brought me back to reality once again.

"Do you remember the room that Tyler used to have?" I nodded. "Well, that's the only spare room we have at the moment so that's the room that Emily's getting. "So can you go to the cupboard and get some sheets and things and come in there?" I nodded. "The cupboard and everything are at the same place as they were the last time you were here. You remember, right?" I nodded and turned down the hall and got all of the sheets and things that I needed. But couldn't help myself from getting nervous, as the seconds kept on ticking towards the while when Emily would get here. Until it at last was barely ten minutes left. Qwyn had been standing outside waiting for the last half hour, and Nathan stood in his room fixing with his clothes.

"Nathan are you okay?"

I came upstairs to the attic Nathan was standing by the dresser and looking to the framed photos on it. He was silently looking down at the photos and his position with holding his hands together behind his back just seemed tense and like asking if he was okay would be a stupid question.

"Yeah."

He answered me he was, but anyone miles away would have heard the lying shining through. And I laid an arm around his shoulders and forced my own feelings away while Nathan lifted his hand and wiped away a tear.

"In this photo…" Nathan pointed to the one with the twins holding each of their sisters and their mum. "I and Qwyn were seven, Emily was three, Minnie one. Three years later the social services took us away from there but… Too what good if they didn't take our sisters with them too? And our mum. Now mum's dead, Minnie's dead. Dad's in prison and so shall stay. And Emily we don't even know… We will have her again but still it felt like with mum, dad and Minnie. We have both lost our whole world. And not only Qwyn who was a lot closer to Minnie than what I was. We have still got you and Mike and each other and everything but it just feels like… I have nothing. Do you get how I feel?"

I had to fight to push air in and out of my airways. What he was describing was exactly what I had felt so, so many times after that plane crash. I still had Uncle Leon, once I was home I had Elizabet, friends had come and gone when the time seemed to be right. Real and fake ones. But without mum, dad and Jonas. I had just lost my everything. And unlike Nathan, I had never been able to put words on what I was feeling.

"Yes," I had to force the words through my throat and mouth. "I get what you mean." I also had to force my own feelings away. It was a long time since that plane crash. For Nathan it was happening here and now. And I couldn't let my own feelings have a part in this. "Come on." I took his hand. "It's time." Nathan nodded and I let go of his hand. Yet he still followed me down the stairs and outside to the driveway where Mike and Qwyn were already waiting.

I could feel my heart beating all the way up into my head. And how Nathan and Qwyn were feeling I couldn't even imagine. Even though I could see both of them being tense and seemed to be having trouble getting air in and out. And every time we heard a car coming down the road it seemed to get even worse and both of the twins almost stopped breathing all along.

At last we heard a new car and it steered into the driveway. The windows were toned and I couldn't see into it. But a woman stepped out and opened the door to a young girl with light brown, wavy hair that stepped out of the car slowly while her older brothers were barely breathing at all.

For a moment the whole world seemed to have gone all silent and still. Just as Emily stood absolutely still by the car and looked to the two twins further up the driveway. And then something seemed to change and she ran straight into the arms of Nathan and threw her arms around his neck as he embraced her back hard and his muffled sobs were heard as his face was pressed into her shirt.

"Natey."

"Yes." Nathan answered while letting her onto the ground. "Yes. That's me." Nathan tried to dry the tears but new ones kept on streaming from his eyes faster than what he could wipe them. And so Emily turned to Qwyn and hugged him too as tightly and as long as a hug could possibly be made. And then it went all silent again. Despite that everybody had gathered in the door.

"Come on." Mike laid a hand on Emily's shoulder blade. She flinched but I could see she was trying to hide it. "It's okay. I won't hurt you. But I think we need to get into the office. Are you coming Emma?" I nodded and Nathan and Qwyn followed Mike and Emily, and I followed them into the office. But still, I was almost walking around as in a fog. And barely heard or saw anything that was going on.

But still, with Nathan's arm around Emily's shoulders. And Qwyn's hands stuffed into his pockets. And with Emily answering every single question she was asked. There was no talking about the things that you could imagine siblings talking about after being reunited after five years apart.

"Nathan, Qwyn. Can you show Emily to her room? I believe you three have got some things to talk about on your own so I will let you. It's the room that Nicholas had. Emma. I need to talk to you a bit." I nodded but still as Emily's old social worker, Emily herself and Nathan and Qwyn left the room. I continued fighting my own feelings away not to mess this job up now when I barely even had it.

"I can see you're fighting trying to fight your feelings away Em." Mike stated. "And it's good to do that when the children are here. But I think that either you let them out. Or things are going to get a whole lot worse. Go out to the old car seats in the garden, yes they're still there. I'll be there in a minute." I nodded, and on shaky legs I stumbled out of the house and out to the old car seats.

"Cup of tea, lovely?"

Just a moment later Mike came out with two steaming cups and handed me one of them and then sat down on the other seats and started sipping from his cup while I just sat there with the cup in my hands and hoped for Mike to say something.

"You still don't drink Tee, do you?" I shook my head. "You can just pour it out." I didn't look at him, but looked up to make sure that I poured the tea on the ground and not onto the seats while I turned the cup upside down and sighed and still hoped for Mike to say something. "You're much like I remember you Emma. More grown- up, but still much like I remember you. You hide your feelings in fear of being weak or not being good enough. You don't listen to yourself and your body. And maybe… most of all… you're kind and friendly and wants to make right for exactly everybody. Even if it means making wrong for yourself. And maybe this is why I'm not a hundred percent sure this was a good idea. This isn't a job that fits for everybody and I know that you know that. So do you think you can keep on doing this?"

"I don't know." My voice broke and I put my head in my hands before I said anything else.

"I just never imagined it to be this hard."

So. Nathan and Qwyn now know what happened to their sisters and their parents. And they both have asthma. Which also Violet has- here comes trouble! David is allergic to caffeine and Marley is allergic to a lot of things while Tracie and Ella get car sick and Ella wants Emma to sit next to her when they're in the car. Ashton have cut her hair short thanks to Qwyn and is very new to the dumping ground. Neither Ashton nor Marty wants to talk about why they're in care. Peityn's very sweet and Emma's got a machine that makes candy floss (It will be mentioned not in this story bit in the next sequel) Peityn's very sweet and starts crying when she tells what happened to her. Shawn has a lot of homework and David doesn't like to be left alone. Then Emily arrives and Emma's pretty messed up about being here after all of these years and after what happened to her but tries to fight her own feelings. And now she doesn't seem too sure if she can even work at the dumping ground. More about this… In the next chapter.

Also, since I deleted the room and the clothes polyvores. If you have polyvore accounts you are free to make new ones for your characters. I won't add them to the collection. But I will save them up on my computer and use them for outfits and for their rooms.

Random fact

You might think that Emma's allergy is very weird. But it's actually the exact same I have. Every little piece of it. First it was the cream cheese, then it was the moldy cheese, then it was halloumi. The reactions are the same, and yes. I've been through people who are very hesitant about believing in me when I tell them. And yes I had that halloumi, and yes I had a bunch of moldy cheese since it just tastes SO VERY GOOD!