When Mercury was sufficiently calm and less worried about red eyes, he left Master behind in the infirmary to rejoin the craziness in the main hall at the man's behest.
Erza was sitting at the bar below, bandages wrapped around the majority of her body. Mercury joined her; despite the guild's partying and pregaming being in full swing, the bar was the least crowded place, barrels of alcohol floating around the benches and tables instead.
Mercury had heard from Levy on the way back from the cathedral that the requip mage had taken out the majority of the Thunder Palace, so his first task after returning was to make sure she was alright. Despite how rough her body looked, she waved him off, saying that there were a lot worse injuries (he doubted it – she was arguably covered in the most bandages of anyone in the guild).
Mercury's respect for the woman, already through the metaphorical ceiling, somehow went even higher.
He was hesitant to push her on the issue of Mystogan, if only because her foray to the Tower of Heaven had been less than a month ago, even though he was immensely curious as to who he was in relation to Jellal. Besides, she didn't comment on his own state; he'd had the forethought to steal some of the spare clothes from the infirmary to hide any scars that might have poked through his torn clothing, but there was no way Erza hadn't noticed it the moment he walked in earlier. She said nothing, instead noticing his own gaze on her, full of questions. She then apologized for freezing up, and said it wouldn't happen again.
"I'm more interested in making sure you're alright than asking why it happened," he explained, slightly taken aback that her initial response was to take responsibility for what was clearly an immensely traumatized response. It was entirely hypocritical for Mercury to judge someone for their reaction to trauma; even now, decades later, he could hardly stand being touched for more than a couple of moments at a time. Mercury hated to be able to say he was familiar with it, the sensation of seeing something that his brain logically knew he shouldn't be seeing but sees anyway. Freezing up was one of the least problematic responses. Throwing up, hyperventilating, or a panic attack were more his genre of response.
Erza paused, carefully curating her response. Finally, she decided on, "I'm not sure who exactly he was, but he looked exactly like Jellal. I'm absolutely certain he has no siblings, but the resemblance was uncanny." she paused afterwards, considering, then corrected herself. "Has no siblings."
"I'll ask him next time he comes through, if I see him. I have some things to say to him as well," Mercury said dryly. He could still hardly believe that the S-Class mage had fled at the sight of Erza when they were in the middle of an intense battle. Mystogan was lucky that Mercury had been there to pick up the slack that he and a dazed Erza left behind.
Erza laughed heartily, a nice sound after seeing her look so down, and crossed her arms. The sound of her metal gauntlets creaking together wasn't pleasant, but Mercury figured he could forgive it just this once if it meant she was smiling again.
"Well, if you see him, let me know – I'll be there to draw some answers out of him, even if I have to beat him out."
Then, it was Mercury's turn to laugh. The image of Erza tying up a dizzy Mystogan and beating him like a pinata popped into head – it wouldn't be the first time she'd done something like that.
Mercury briefly wondered if Mystogan had already fled Magnolia, or if they had a chance to catch up to him now that the "Battle of Fairy Tail" was over.
He doubted it.
The Fantasia Parade was going to happen soon, assuming that the town wasn't completely trashed or angry at the guild for their troublesome antics. Mystogan never participated, so he was likely already gone. Had he already been coming to the town before Laxus's shenanigans, ro had he started over this way when he heard what was going on? Another question to ask the mage next time he showed up to the guild and tried to get them all over with that sleeping magic of his.
On the topic of S-Class mages, another thought popped into his mind. Mercury took a quick peek around, but couldn't find the white haired mage that he had been thinking of, nor her brother.
"Did Mira really use her Satan Soul?" He asked out of the blue.
Erza didn't seem startled by the question. She nodded, mind apparently far away and eyes not quite focusing on the person in front of her. "... Or so Cana told me. She said that Fried had been – well, it's not really my story to tell, but it ended with Mira's victory over Fried."
Which was incredibly pleasing, if not surprising. He wondered if Fried was even able to walk right now. Actually, he began to wonder where the Thunder God Tribe even was. Surely they didn't plan on sticking around after all of this; Laxus was sure to be excommunicated, and Mercury knew they'd follow whatever the dragon slayer chose to do.
As if to prove Mercury wrong, the whole guild immediately went silent, a hushed wave passing through the crowd as soon as the double doors to the guild swung open. Behind it, the last person he expected to see: Laxus.
The man looked a lot more subdued than he did at the cathedral, and another wave of emotion threatened to crash over Mercury again. He had bandages on his face, and there were still specks of blood at the corners of his nose. Gone was the smug, arrogant smile that so often graced Laxus's features, replaced instead with a blank mask that was on the verge of shattering completely. His lips tilted downwards at the sides, his eyebrows angled slightly in a way that told Mercury he was trying to keep himself composed, keeping up the farce that was his composure in front of the people he'd had fighting for their lives less than two hours ago.
His nose remained immensely crooked, Mercury noted with a mixture of glee and sadness.
Laxus took less than three steps into the guild before everyone inside moved to fight, not even flinching at the aggravation their damaged bodies caused them. They jumped in front of his path, blocking him from what was clearly his goal: the room where Master Makarov was resting. Some shouted obscenities, calling him a bastard and the like, their anger from the battles now turned from their guildmates onto him, while most simply glowered down at the dragon slayer. Mercury could feel the tension in the guild hall as though it were the electricity that Laxus so often produced, except, for once, he didn't feel that telltale static in the air with Laxus's presence.
For once, the dragon slayer looked defeated. Mercury would have reveled in having gotten him to take a look inside himself and everything that he'd projected on others if not for the sad look in his eyes.
Even though they'd been fighting less than an hour ago, seeing that look in Laxus's eyes hurt. It had been years since they worked together as a unit with the Thunder God Tribe, but years were short to Mercury; it could have been just yesterday and he'd felt that unfamiliar pang in his chest at how Laxus looked like he'd been stomped on – and it was Mercury who had done the stomping. None of the words he'd said were untrue, even when on the verge of unconsciousness. Mercury knew that the dragon slayer deserved to feel pained more than anyone else in the guild in that moment, and yet his heart still felt twisted.
Everything had to come to an end sometime, he told himself. It was the same words that he'd said less than six years ago when they'd first argued and fought, and they felt just as worthless now as they had then.
Mercury's jaw set painfully, teeth digging into his cheek, but he said nothing.
He feared for a moment that they wouldn't even allow Laxus to see his grandfather, who, for all he knew, was dying at that very moment. He doubted they'd listen to him if he suggested they let Laxus through, if only because everyone knew how close the two of them used to be, so he relief tittered through his body when Erza forced the crowd to part, staring down her nose at Laxus; neither mage held even an ounce of arrogance or hatred towards the other, and the only thing between them was respect for the other as mages.
That's all their gazes held, though. Mercury knew Erza held no respect for Laxus as a person, especially not after the day's events, and the feeling was probably mutual.
Still, Erza let Laxus through. "He's in the medical bay," she said, unwavering.
Laxus gave her a small nod.
And Natsu, who had the best timing of any of them, chose that moment to burst through the guild's doors once more and demand a match between the two of them. The fire dragon slayer claimed he hadn't gotten his moment to shine and, turning to Mercury, shouted that the water mage took his opportunity.
Despite himself, Mercury laughed. Leave it to Natsu to break any of the remaining tension in the air, even though the boy was surely unaware of the effect he had on the guild as it returned to the cheers and hollering of the drunk mages. Laxus was promptly ignored.
Laxus turned to face Mercury at the mention of his name, and if Mercury didn't know any better, he'd have thought there was the barest shred of concern in the dragon slayer's stony face. He gave a small tilt of his head in acknowledgement. The water mage had passed out, after all – and it was unlikely that Laxus knew why, considering that even Mercury was barely beginning to come to any sort of conclusion.
The lightning dragon slayer gave a small wave over his shoulder as he turned to go up the stairs where his grandfather was waiting, a promise to his younger compatriot that the next time they got the chance to fight, it would shake the whole town and more.
(Wait, it occurred to Mercury, did Natsu ever find out that Laxus was also a dragon slayer?)
Despite how busy things were in the guild a couple of hours later, Mercury found a moment for himself to slip away unnoticed. Actually, he had the feeling that Mira was merely turning a blind eye, knowing exactly where he was going.
Laxus and the master's conversation had been short. Mercury knew he'd been excommunicated. There was no other course of action Master could have taken after all that had happened that day, and even if Mercury hadn't been aware of what was going on, he could have taken the hint from Makarov's faintly red watery eyes as he rejoined the preparations.
The half an hour or so in between Mercury's tears and Laxus's banishment hadn't been long enough to get his thoughts settled, but at least the water mage had already been able to come to terms with the fact that Laxus would not be present for any time in the near future.
How funny it was that just weeks ago, Mercury had been so irritated by the lightning dragon slayer's presence that he'd physically left the building, and now that he was actually going to be gone, the thought filled him with a somber feeling.
The town was in high spirits as the water mage meandered the streets, eyes peeled for the blonde. Some Fairy Tail mages waved to him as they passed, their faces still slightly flushed with alcohol even as they hurried around finishing their preparations for the Fantasia Festival. It seemed as though the majority of the civilians hadn't been clued in on what had happened, which was probably for the best, but the sheer number of kids running around on the street without a care in the world sent a pang through his chest. He knew for certain that he wouldn't have let his daughter run around like that after –
Okay. Maybe it was better to stop that train of thought before he started to truly dwell on it. There were already too many thoughts going through his head, and he didn't need any more to pile on top of them.
Mercury found the dragon slayer on the outskirts of town, at an abandoned playground that seemed oddly familiar by merit of being so commonplace. It wasn't really the place for a farewell, but there Laxus was, a familiar traveling pack dropped on the ground and an exasperated look on his face as Evergreen and Bixlow complained about his punishment. Fried remained nearby, looking contemplative.
And the water mage chose not to intrude. This was their moment, and all three of them were much closer with Laxus than he was as of late. He wouldn't intrude.
"Why are you the only one being banned?" Evergreen was all-but crying. Thick tears remained clinging to her eyelashes, unable to fall past all of the mascara she had on them. Laxus met her eyes with a face that appeared a lot more serene than Mercury had seen in a long time now, as though he'd come to terms with himself. It was just a shame that it took the events of the day for him to realize it.
"Yeah, didn't we commit the same crime?" Bixlow added on. His tikis flared behind him like butterflies, repeating a mixture of 'didn't we?' and 'same crime?'
That familiar smirk appeared on Laxus's face once more, though, this time, it wasn't full of arrogance, replaced with an emotion that Mercury couldn't read. Laxus seemed to have accepted his excommunication with a rather heavy heart, all things considered, and didn't want to bring his fellow mages down with him.
It appeared as though the dragon slayer had things to think through alone.
Laxus shrugged. "It's what gramps decided."
Immediately, Bixlow and Evergreen claimed they were going to leave the guild as well. Mercury still couldn't fathom just how loyal they could be to a man who was fully willing to let them go down with him, but, then again, he didn't understand a lot of the things that went through the Thunder God Tribe's minds.
"I can't even say anything about leaving on my own? You guys are so annoying." The dragon slayer gave a small fake cough to move the conversation along, but even Mercury could tell that his words had no bite to them.
"But –"
"I'm not taking all of the blame. I don't have any regrets about being in the guild or leaving, and I'm not taking any more complaints about it. Don't go complaining about this to gramps about this, you hear?"
"I'm sure we can get –" Bixlow started, only to get cut off by a somber looking Fried, who saved the dragon slayer by interrupting. "Goodbye, Laxus. We'll see each other again."
They're so melodramatic. He's being kicked out of the guild, not banned from the country, Mercury thought quietly despite the fact that he had been bawling his eyes out less than an hour and a half ago at the same thought.
Fried's face was a mirror to Laxus's. He was the only one of the three who hadn't been "saved" by the dragon slayer, having been essentially adopted into their ragtag little group somewhere along the way. He was the least indoctrinated of the group. Both men looked somber, a little tired, but not particularly sad as Fried gently pulled a still protesting Evergreen away, a confused looking Bixlow slowly following behind.
For a moment, all Mercury could hear was the breeze whistling through the building. Then, Laxus called out to him – he'd almost forgotten the dragon slayer's increased sense of smell.
"Get out here already. Stop watching like some creep."
Mercury stepped out of the shade with a shrug. "I didn't want to interrupt.
He noted that Laxus's nose had been mostly straightened, but still had the telltale tilt of a nose that had been broken. His face had been bandaged, though, by whom, he didn't know – perhaps Porlyusica had done it. Her hatred of humans spared no one, yet she didn't particularly seem to care enough to think about who exactly she was treating.
Laxus took a deep breath in, then sighed just as deeply. "Those guys really worry about too much, don't they?"
"Yeah, it's not like you just dragged them all into a plot that could have gotten them all thrown into prison or anything. Or worse."
Gotten them killed.
Mercury eyed Laxus; he paused, then offered weakly, "They were all on board…"
"Because, for reasons I don't understand, all three of them love and respect you way too much." It was as though this was the first time that Laxus had considered this, because his eyes widened just a fraction before reverting back to that somber look. It really didn't suit him, but Mercury supposed it was better than the blank face he'd been showing earlier.
"Sorry," Laxus said, and the water mage was taken aback. He'd almost never heard the dragon slayer apologize to anyone, even when he really would have been better off giving at least a half-assed one. The one that had just fallen from his lips just felt wrong. And incredibly misplaced, to boot.
"To who? To me? I didn't come here for an apology. If anyone deserves one, it would be those three. And the guild, of course, but I know you're too proud for that."
"Then why did you come here? To laugh?"
Mercury paused. He didn't know if he should be peeved or not that Laxus thought him the kind of person to kick a man while he was down; an enemy, sure, the water mage would do it without hesitation, but even if he and Laxus hadn't been on speaking terms for a while now, that didn't mean they were enemies. At least, they probably weren't now.
"When have I ever laughed at you when you didn't already deserve it? Give me some credit. I already broke your nose, so I think that's enough of what you deserve from me today. Now are you gonna listen to me, or keep standing there looking pathetic?"
They stood in silence for a moment. Laxus looked like he was questioning exactly what Mercury was talking about, but still gave a small, "Yeah."
"You were right. I never told any of you guys anything."
Laxus didn't say anything. Mercury knew that he knew the water mage was entirely correct, even though it seemed like Laxus had just come to the realization that the secrecy was what hurt until earlier that day.
So Mercury would come clean. About everything.
"I'm only going to say it once, so you better listen through until the end, alright? Once I start talking, I'm not going to stop until I finish, even if that means I have to pin you down, so now is your only chance to get me to shut up before I start."
Laxus nodded with a hesitancy that was unlike him. To him, it might have been on the same level as finding out what his father had done to be excommunicated, a secret that had been building and building and building because no one would tell him until it came to a breaking point – and now, for once, someone was telling him something.
"Okay. Where to start…?" Mercury mumbled. Even though he'd said he was going to explain, that didn't mean he'd planned out what he was saying quite yet. "Well, first, the reasons I didn't go with you to the S-Class trials, because that's where this," he gestured vaguely towards the cathedral, "all started."
"No –" Laxus tried to interrupt, face shifting from somber to angry. Was he seriously trying to deny that Mercury's denial hadn't been part of the reason he'd set out on the "wrong" path?
Mercury put his hand up. "No, you said you'd listen. Work with me, Lax, or we're going to be here until the sun sets, and Mira will have my head."
He still had Fantasia preparations to help with, after all.
Laxus sighed, but motioned for the water mage to continue. "You're insufferable."
"Thanks, you too. Anyway, reason one – you know I used to live in the ocean, right?"
Laxus nodded.
"Well, I didn't exactly leave it on good terms. I was allowed to leave with the intent that I would eventually return because I couldn't stand it up here, with certain things in place to make it harder to resist coming back. To be honest, if I get too close, I'm not certain I'll be able to stay away."
The dragon slayer looked incredulous at the indication that the ocean was like a hard street drug, but that was the most apt comparison Mercury could come up with on the spot. He liked being on the land a lot, but it would never be anything like the ecstasy he felt in open waters.
Mercury still felt it often, the gentle call of the waters becoming him back. It wanted him to return, needed him to return as desperately as something, some animalistic instinct dug into the back of his brain telling the water mage he needed to go back, too.
But he refused to go back. Ever. He'd rather die.
"There was also just no point. I don't really care about my reputation as much as an egoistic prick like you does, and I can be strong without fancy titles."
Laxus visibly bit his tongue, jaw tightening at yet another insult directed towards him. But, wisely, he remained silent, allowing Mercury to continue.
"Alright, monologuing time, I suppose. I'll tell you everything; who I am, where I came from, and why I'm here."
It was a bit of a long story, but starting back from the beginning was necessary. He wasn't sure how much Laxus had pieced out.
"I was born somewhere off the coast of Magnolia at the bottom of the ocean, where I lived for about twenty or so years before realizing that I was neither needed nor wanted," Mercury said, watching Laxus flinch from how blunt he was being.
The situation was almost the exact opposite of Laxus's; the lightning dragon slayer had an incredibly large family that loved him, even after his transgressions (Mercury, unfortunately included) and yet he'd spurned them all, rejecting their love, affection, and care in favor of chasing his own ideals. Mercury, on the other hand, had been spurned, his "family" too busy chasing their own ideal of how they should live to give a second thought to their youngest member.
"Affectionately, instead of my name, they just called me a defect. It's kind of funny, looking back on it all – surely there were better things they could have called me, but a 'defect' was just so…" So what? So delusionally simple? So needlessly cruel?
What was it about Mercury that was wrong?
"And they called me a defect because I wasn't like them. They're… kind of hard to explain. My brothers and sisters don't feel things the way that you and I do; to them, the world is very black and white. There are things that are supposed to be treasured, and things that are supposed to be discarded," Mercury explained, pausing before coming up with the words. "They're all just sort of… the same."
Each one was so similar to the others. Other than the brilliantly colored scales, there was little to differentiate his siblings from each other, of which he was the sole exception. While they all shined brilliantly even so deeply in the sea that light could not penetrate, Mercury alone was dull. His scales were the color of slate, not the gleaming gemstones that his siblings had. Not the mysteriously dusky violet of his eldest sister or the shimmering blue of one of his older brothers, Mercury was just… stone.
"I tried to run away from it all. We are all born the same way, from a Mother, and she saw us as little more than possessions. She," Mercury swallowed, "did not see things from my perspective."
If there was something wrong with him, there was something wrong with him. That's what she had told him. It might have seemed an acceptance of his flaws, but in reality, it was an admission that he was not like the others – which was taken as permission to become harsher.
Of course, it wasn't like all of his siblings had harassed him. Most didn't care. Life under the sea was so mind-numbingly dull that many had fallen under the illusion of life and were living just for the sake of living, not because they had a reason to.
"And when I tried to run, I found there was no escape for me, so I tried the next best thing," Mercury said. The grin on his face was entirely unnatural, as though he should have been proud of his actions.
He wasn't. He had run.
"I tried to die."
It didn't work.
Laxus looked like he wanted to say something else, face so pained yet remembering the promise that Mercury had made him swear just minutes ago. He opened his mouth, shutting it more when the water mage raised an eyebrow.
Laxus could rebuke him later. For now, he'd just finish his story; it was the least he could do for keeping it to himself for so long.
"Obviously, it didn't work, but when I awoke I found myself on a little beach that's rather far from here. I could probably point it out on a map, though there's not really a name for the area now. No one lives there anymore," Mercury said. He clenched his fingers – this was the part of the story he hated most. "It was odd seeing the sun for the first time. It burned. I seriously thought I was going to die until this girl came up to me and covered me with her jacket."
That girl, of course, was the one he'd eventually taken as his wife.
"Chloe's hair was more brilliant than any color I'd seen before, far more beautiful than any scales I'd ever seen. She was brilliant. I learned all sorts of things from her – how to speak your language, how to read and write, how to interact with people. She taught me all about human society. I wouldn't be here if not for her."
And Laxus better thank Chloe, because it was her who taught Mercury how to love.
"We had a kid, too. Little Marissa – she looked so much like those siblings that I despised, but also so much like Chloe. I loved her a lot. Both of them."
But it was not something he could hold on to. Mercury's chest throbbed lazily as he remembered everything that came next, all the fear and rage and pain that followed.
He recalled their screams.
"I don't know how they found out, but I woke up one day to the realization that my brothers had found me, and I knew they weren't going to let me get away again. I could tell they had come for me," Mercury said, "but there was nothing I could do."
"You gave up your family?"
"No. Laxus, do you know what it's like to get stabbed?"
Laxus nodded; both of them had taken stab wounds before, though the dragon slayer's had never been nearly as grievous as Mercury's had been. Mercury fought like his body was covered in armor.
"Then, do you know what happens when you get stabbed repeatedly? When you can't die, but you also can't move because it hurts and there's a body pinned underneath you that's already dead?"
Laxus shook his head. He looked sick, knowing where this was going.
"That's good, you know? I'd rather no one else have to go through that," Mercury stared right at Laxus, daring the man to look away. The dragon slayer didn't, holding his gaze evenly even though it was clear he wasn't comfortable – but he had asked for this, and Mercury was going to give it to him. "When I came to, I was back in the ocean, I had the first and only scar I've ever gotten, and they had me pinned up like I was some sort of decoration. And Mother was pissed."
He had never seen her so angry in his life; in fact, he'd never really seen her at all, her form little more than a blurry outline among sea currents.
Mercury had always debated whether or not she was real. Something about her was both ethereal and grounded, beautiful yet obscene in a way that didn't seem natural. She held more power in her invisible "body" than he had in his.
She could have obliterated him if she wanted to.
"Of course, she told me how worried and upset she had been while I was missing – only five years, if you can believe that. I couldn't really pay attention all that much, though. I still had the fuckin' weapon in my stomach, but she didn't seem to care. At least she told off my brothers for their cruelty, I guess."
The water mage then lifted his shirt, replaced and freshly clean now that the fighting festival was over. There were two obvious things beneath it; he hadn't lifted it far enough to reveal the charred, rotting-like mark over his heart, but the pale skin outlined his guild mark, which sat against the ribs on the left side of his body, and the huge, jagged scar that ran through his stomach.
He could have turned around and showed Laxus the back, too. It was just as bad.
To this day, the skin remained pale red, as though it had been burned, and it was jagged and bumpy. The rest of his body was smooth and white, so it stuck out like a sore thumb, especially with how damaged it still appeared, like the wound was still raw.
No doubt, any human would have been killed by it.
Laxus's face drew back in a snarl. "You –"
"I told you to let me finish before you said anything," Mercury whined. He knew that Laxus was just angry, the same as him, and yet he didn't want to stop speaking.
If he stopped now, he might just abandon the rest.
"Just – how have I not seen any of this before?" Laxus asked, confused. "There's no way I wouldn't have noticed…"
"I was always very careful. This was never a conversation I wanted to have."
In all his time with the Thunder God Tribe, Mercury had somehow, miraculously managed to keep that portion of skin carefully covered. His clothes were skintight, so there was no risk of them flying up in the wind, and he always wore dark colors so that they'd never become translucent when wet. He never changed around them if he could help it, and even when he did, Mercury shoved himself into the tightest corner to avoid being seen. Even during the times where they stopped at hot springs or saunas on the way back from long jobs and the boys tried to drag him in with them, Mercury shook them off by saying he hated water.
They'd all laughed at him a bit – not maliciously, but because it was just so ironic – even though it wasn't untrue.
So, really, it wasn't a surprise that Laxus hadn't seen the scar.
"I don't like people asking questions," Mercury explained after a long moment of silence, "but I think you already knew that."
Laxus nodded – that's why they were having this conversation at all.
"Anyway, Mother couldn't do a thing to make me stay. I told her that if she ordered me to live, I'd die, and she didn't like that at all. Neither did my siblings, really. Unfortunately, after I got back to the ocean, I became like this – my regeneration ability was never bad, but I started feeling faster than I could cause damage to myself. I think Mother had something to do with that. She didn't want me to miraculously succeed."
"In dying?"
The dragon slayer's face looked pained as though he couldn't stand the idea of his friend wanting to die.
"Yes," Mercury explained, "but I'm not like that as much anymore. I like it here. I don't want to die."
"And how'd you get back up here then? Doesn't sound like they'd let you leave so easily."
"They did, actually. Or, Mother did. I'm sure my siblings weren't nearly as pleased as I was. She was convinced that I'd return of my own free will one day, and that I would never want to leave again. Fat chance, though. I'm not going back."
Even if it killed him.
"But you said she treated you as a possession," Laxus pointed out. "Surely she wouldn't have just let you walk out?"
"You're questioning my story?"
"Just trying to make sense of things."
Unsurprisingly, Laxus was able to pinpoint anything Mercury intentionally hid or left out; that was part of what had gotten them into this mess, and it was going to draw out the conversation even longer.
"You're right, though."
"Huh?" The dragon slayer asked.
"You're right," Mercury repeated, "it's not without conditions. Like I said, her intent is for me to come back on my own. I'd have fled from here a long time ago if it was really that simple. I love Magnolia now, but I hate the ocean."
The waters… scared him. Looking out at it made him feel like the same siblings that had taken Chloe and Marissa from him were going to do the same thing with his new family, with Fairy Tail.
"Then why stay?" Laxus asked.
Mercury gave him a long, dry stare, an eyebrow cocked. "Do you want me to leave?"
"Don't be obtuse," Laxus rolled his eyes. "That's not what I'm asking – why did you stay in Magnolia if being so close is going to be so… emotionally taxing for you?"
The water mage sighed, biting his tongue briefly. This was the part of the second part of the conversation that he didn't want to have, but it appeared that was going to be impossible. Mercury didn't want to leave more secrets between them, not if it was possible he wouldn't be seeing Laxus for a long time.
"If I were to leave," he said, meeting Laxus's eyes directly, "I would die."
"What?"
"And as it is, I am going to die anyway, but that's going to be a long ways –"
"No, no, Mercury, hold on, back up. I know I said I wasn't going to interrupt, but you can't just say that and expect me not to," Laxus hissed. "What do you mean you're going to die anyway?"
"Laxus," he paused, staring at the dragon slayer, "where do you think I get my magic power from? It's not the ethernano in the air, like humans."
He thought for a couple of seconds before answering, lips pressed together tightly with concern. "... the ocean?"
"Bingo. I get it from the ocean."
"But it's right there," Laxus protested. "You can't just get more?"
"Don't be obtuse," Mercury repeated Laxus's earlier words. The dragon slayer looked about ready to strangle him. "I already said I can't go in the water. And Ethernano isn't as stable as one might think – it can form complexes that are naked to the unassisted eye, but that breaks down pretty quickly. I can only take in the ethernano in the ocean, which there isn't much of in the natural air."
Laxus fell silent. He seemed to put what Mercury was saying together, though neither of them wanted to admit the gravity of those words.
Magic Deficiency – and a chronic version of it at that, considering the water mage was saying he lacked the ability to regenerate magic as humans normally did.
"It's never really been that big of a deal," Mercury explained. "I had a lot of magic stored in my body that it wasn't that hard to just fill up a little bit when I got back to Magnolia after missions, but as I started going on more and more jobs…"
"It got harder to recover your magic," Laxus finished. He stared at Mercury with bated breath, both waiting and dreading confirmation.
Mercury nodded, and Laxus cursed.
"Why didn't you say anything, you idiot? I wouldn't have dragged you around as much as I did if I'd known."
"But then I would have had to have this conversation with you, which I have been vehemently avoiding. Besides, would you have listened?"
Both of them knew the answer was 'no.' Laxus back then was just as stubborn as Laxus was now; he'd have taken it as some excuse, or in the same way he had taken it – explosive anger. Their fight would have happened either way.
"I'd have at least –"
"It's okay, Lax. It's in the past now."
Their fight was in the past now – that's the real reason that they'd fought all those years ago, because Mercury was getting weaker, and he refused to tell anyone why.
It was his fault.
Of course, the water mage wouldn't take all the blame for it. Laxus still deserved most of it for being a pig headed fool, but that's what it boiled down to. Mercury's refusal to divulge anything.
"God, you're infuriating," Laxus said as though he was privy to Mercury's inner thoughts. "You never told anyone this?"
"You're the first," he confirmed.
Laxus, again, looked like he wanted to strangle the water mage; his fists kept clenching and unclenching, arms and shoulders desperately tight. His feet kicked the little rocks laying on the ground.
"I can't believe you," he grumbled, putting a hand to his nose like he was trying to stave off a headache. "I can't believe you wouldn't say anything – oh, wait, yes I can, because you're a self-sacrificial idiot with no sense of self preservation."
"You don't have to be mean about it."
"Yes, apparently I do!"
It was as though they hadn't fought less than five hours ago, as though they hadn't fought six years ago. As though nothing had changed between them.
"I mean… you should be pretty glad I have no sense of self preservation, at least with the antics you put us through today. If it were anyone else, Makarov would not have been nearly so forgiving" Mercury laughed.
"How so?"
"Do you know how many volts of electricity it takes to stop someone's heart? Well, I do, and it's somewhere between whatever you did today and a million."
"I – what?"
"You should be glad it was me," Mercury repeated, "because you would have killed anyone else."
"Oh." That gave Laxus something to think about.
"You should really learn to control your strength a bit more, or you actually will kill someone next time."
Mercury couldn't tell if Laxus was having a hard time formulating a sentence because he was getting angry or it was because he was getting flustered. Either way, it was nice getting to tease him again.
How long would it be until he got to do this again?
Come tomorrow, Laxus would be gone, potentially forever. At least, there was a very real possibility that he'd never be part of Fairy Tail ever again. That meant that this could be the last time they got to chat so easily like this, in a random park in Magnolia as the sun set before the Fantasia parade.
Oh, right, the parade.
"You look like you just thought of something horrific," Laxus commented.
Mercury stared dryly off in the direction of the sunset, where the parade was still being prepared, "I did. Mira's going to kill me. I told her I was going to run home and change clothes."
"And yet you're still here talking."
"Yeah, couldn't let my best friend leave with bad blood. Who knows when you'll be back through here."
Laxus stayed silent.
"And to go back to that dying thing – I'm not in any danger. I'm still going to outlive you, anyway, especially with the way you seem determined to get everyone to hate you."
The dragon slayer's gaze was scrutinizing, but for once, Mercury wasn't lying. That was the whole, uncensored truth.
He would be fine.
He wasn't going to die any time soon, and he sure as hell wasn't going back to the ocean. No matter what.
"Do you hate me?" Laxus asked quietly.
Such hesitance wasn't befitting of the dragon slayer. He should be loud and brash, just like the others of his kind appeared to be, not this almost shy quietness.
"Do you remember the time I got stabbed, and you thought I was going to die?" Mercury asked instead of answering.
Laxus sputtered, caught off guard. "Of course, but – but what does that have to do with this?"
It wasn't a memory either of them particularly cared for – in fact, it was the very occasion that had led to Laxus's learning of Fairy Law. One could say it was the beginning of everything that had happened that day.
"It was the first time in a long time that someone told me they wanted me to live. That you told me you wanted me to live." And that image, the sound of Laxus's pleading cries even though Mercury would surely be fine, would be what he remembered when he thinks of Laxus. Not the hurtful words. Not the arrogance. Just a boy who wanted his friend to live.
"I want you to live," Laxus repeated.
Mercury tilted his head with a smile, but said nothing else, turning to face the sunset completely with his hands on his hips.
"Don't you dare fucking die before I get back here."
"Not planning on it," the water mage huffed. "It'll take a lot to kill me, I think. Whatever mess Fairy Tail gets itself into probably won't even come close."
"You say that now, but…"
"I won't die. You know I'm stubborn – I don't do things I don't want to, and I don't want to leave the guild anytime soon. Is that enough for you?"
Laxus remained silent like his answer was, 'no, but he didn't refute what Mercury said. He just sighed like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.
"Oh, come on. You didn't worry about me before I told you everything, so don't make me regret it; I hate people worrying about me."
"I know. That's why I'm worried."
"Fuck off," Mercury coughed. "I'll be fine. I'll put in my will that I want Mira to write you a letter if I die, but she's going to say I died doing something heroic. Fighting dragons, maybe. Or fighting Gildarts. Then I'd sound cool." A small laugh came from his mouth, followed by a wry grin. It was a gruesome topic, his own death, but it was nice to talk about something heavy in a light tone.
Laxus didn't think it was funny. He slapped the back of Mercury's head softly, but certainly not playfully.
"If I find out you died from Mira, I'll kill you twice as hard, I swear to god, Merc."
But there was no god, and Mercury was not going to die, anyway.
"If I'm going to die, it'll be because Mira realizes I've been gone for almost an hour, the parade is starting soon, and I haven't finished making the water feature yet," he said instead.
(Mercury could groan; he'd been talking to Laxus for so long already that the air had already become brisk, and the growing crowds were becoming audible. He was not making it out of this one without being given a stern talking-to.)
Laxus's face returned to something akin to blank, but at least it wasn't looking like he was desperately trying to hold himself together. "Good luck," he said, though he made no other movements.
The blue-haired mage paused before he turned away. He absolutely hated lecturing people, especially Laxus, but there were just a couple of things that Mercury thought the man needed to hear before he departed.
"What I said in the cathedral – none of it was wrong, you know? You're Laxus Dreyar. You're not defined by what people think of you. It's your decisions that are going to shape how they think of you, so why should you care? Fuck 'em." That was what worked for Mercury, anyway. Fuck those guys back home who thought he should act according to their rules; fuck that weird, water-diety-thing that wanted to define his life.
Mercury was Mercury. Laxus was Laxus.
"We're Fairy Tail's most chaotic duo. We strike fear into the hearts of those that cross us and those that watch us alike. Take your time searching for whatever you're looking for, because you're young and you got plenty of it."
"You sound like that damn old man. Quit it," Laxus hissed, "or I'm going to have to recommend hospice care for you."
"Trust me, I'm going to be worse when I'm actually old. My older siblings? They never shut up. I had to listen to them prattle on about the goodness in Mother's heart or something for like, a month."
Laxus finally grinned. It looked so much better than the frown that had been stitched on his face for the entirety of the conversation. "You still don't listen to anything anyone says."
"It's a learned behavior. And by that, I mean I learned it from you."
The dragon slayer shrugged as though to insist that it wasn't his fault, either, which was probably true to a degree. Laxus's upbringing wasn't exactly an ideal one, either. Mercury knew about his dad. Ivan. If he ever saw that man, then a simple drowning wouldn't be close to enough.
In the distance, the sun was rising, and Mercury could hear the whoops of Fairy Tail becoming rowdy. Fantasia would be starting soon, and with it, Laxus's farewell.
What, did the dragon slayer think he wouldn't be getting out of this without saying goodbye to everyone? Most probably hated him, but… there were definitely still the few that wished he could have just gone back to how he was as a kid.
Mercury included; he knew Laxus as a fifteen year old, and though he was… angsty, at least that was better than angry.
"... Do you think Mira will ask Natsu to track me down like a hunting dog?" Mercury asked suddenly. He could imagine it clearly. The fire dragon slayer often seemed more pooch than dragon, if he was being honest.
"Probably."
"Then I best get going," the water mage sighed.
He didn't want to part from Laxus, but it wasn't like this was the end.
"If I don't hear rumors about Fairy Tail being in chaos, I'm going to come back whether Gramps likes it or not, you know."
Laxus could always come back and visit.
"Then I'll keep your house nice and tidy for you if you'd like," Mercury offered.
Laxus scoffed, "You? I think you'd make it even more of a mess, and it would smell bad."
"I'm hurt," Mercury whined, kicking the stones underfoot in Laxus's direction.
"No, you're not. Now get going. Natsu's face is the absolute last thing I want to see right now, and he'd be even worse at letting me leave than you are."
… had Natsu ever puzzled out that Laxus was a dragon slayer? Oh, Mercury could have some fun with that.
"Right," Mercury said, finally starting to walk away. He'd better do that before he got roped into teasing Laxus about something else. "Don't forget what I said. And don't talk to any blue-haired freaks, especially if they know my name. And don't –"
"Go," Laxus hissed.
The water mage got one last laugh, heading towards the blinding light of the sun. He called out behind him, "See you at Fantasia!" as though it had already been decided that Laxus would be going, and said his last farewell with a wave over his shoulder.