Chapter 9 - Disease Control
The Quarry Campsite
Tess woke up before dawn and watched the world wake up around her. As the sun crested over the horizon birds began to chirp and with it, the promise of a new day. Perhaps today they would be lucky and the CDC would be the answer to all their problems. Tess knew it was a long shot but it was a try nonetheless.
Rick was the next to wake up. Walkie in hand, he found a secluded area where he wouldn't wake anyone up and tried to reach Morgan. He hadn't had any luck the previous morning so he was hoping to hear from them now but he still got no response. He continued to speak into the walkie anyway in case he or Duane were listening, telling them about how they were leaving the Quarry and heading for the CDC. He felt concerned for the man and his son, unsure what could have happened to make them not answer his call. He wished he'd urged them more to join them but knew there was nothing he could do now.
"Morgan, if you can hear this. Go to the CDC." Static crackled back at him and he sighed, heading back into camp.
Tess watched as Rick made his way towards her while turning the walkie around in his hands anxiously.
"No luck?"
"None. I couldn't reach him yesterday either."
"I hope they're okay."
"Me too. I tried to tell him that we're going to the CDC but I don't even know if they were listening. I told him to come here."
"We can leave him a note if they do. Tell them where we've gone." She reasoned, seeing the look of guilt on Rick's face. Her idea did spark some relief in him though and he nodded in agreement.
"Where did you end up sleeping last night?" He asked her, shifting the conversation away as well as his concern.
"Just by the fire."
"We'll have to find you a tent."
"I don't mind sleeping under the stars. I've had to sleep in conditions much worse than this."
"I don't doubt that. But you're a part of this group now and you deserve to have a space of your own." Rick stressed to her but Tess deflected his worry.
"Who knows, maybe they'll have proper rooms with beds at the CDC."
"That would be nice, my back is killing me." Groaned Rick.
"Old man." Tess teased him in jest and laughed when he feigned offense.
It didn't take long for the rest of the camp to wake up and in no time, people had packed up their belongings in preparation to leave the quarry. Tess' washed clothes were still a bit damp but she stuffed them in her backpack nonetheless, deciding she'd deal with it later. Bag slung over her shoulder and rifle in hand, she looked on as the Morales family said their goodbyes, Rick trying one last time to persuade them to come with but they'd made up their minds and were set on leaving. Tess hadn't had the chance to get to know the family at all but gave them a wave goodbye as they got into their vehicle.
Everyone else started drifting toward their own vehicles and Tess sighed, realizing she'd have to awkwardly ask to hitch a ride. Rick's vehicle was full with Carol and Sophia hopping in with his family and Glenn and T-Dog were only in a single cab truck which looked like enough of a squeeze with just the two of them. She didn't really want to ride in the RV, not with Andrea still in mourning and Jim being sick as he was. That only left Shane's vehicle or Daryl's truck. And she sure as shit wasn't riding shotgun with Shane and his ego. She hoped Daryl had gotten over whatever issue he was dealing with yesterday and wandered over to him.
"Mind if I jump in with you?" She asked, hopefully. It was a good start that he hadn't run away from her again when he saw her so maybe he had just not been in the mood for company yesterday. He looked over to her coldly and didn't say anything for a moment and Tess wondered if he'd tell her no.
He finally just shrugged at her and she took that as a yes. She felt a bit like a child trailing after him as he led her to this open bed truck. Tied down on the back was an old, black Triumph Bonneville with ape hanger handlebars. Tess was curious as to why Daryl wasn't riding that instead, certain that it must feel good being able to really open it up on the road without any risk of being flagged down by a cop. Tossing her belongings into the footwell of the passenger seat, she jumped in, choosing not to say anymore to Daryl as he still seemed to be in a foul mood.
Truth be told, there was something bothering Daryl and he wasn't all too happy about it either. He hadn't meant to see what he saw, it's not like he was lurking and waiting for the opportunity or anything like that, he wasn't a creep. But with the way the sun hit her skin, he couldn't help but take notice. God, you actin' like you ain't ever seen a woman naked before, he'd been scolding himself since he laid eyes on her. She weren't even naked, neither. Get a grip.
He'd been unable to look at her yesterday without the thought of her by the lake popping into his head and even now, he struggled to shake the image from his memory. He realized he was probably acting strange but he didn't care. What did he care what she thought of him anyway? Jumping into the driver's seat, he started up the truck and joined the convoy en route to the CDC. He wasn't sold on the fairytale Rick was trying to sell them about the disease control center. But he also didn't see any other option. He just hoped that it wouldn't be a waste of time.
Tess looked out the window as they drove along the highway, watching the world go by. She'd spotted a few walkers ambling about but not enough to be concerned. Thankfully their drive so far had been issue free and they were able to drive at a good speed. They should hopefully reach their destination by late afternoon. Daryl hadn't said anything for the past hour that he'd been driving and Tess was curious as to whether that was normal for him or if she'd done something to upset him. She didn't know what she could've done though. Maybe she'd just bothered him by being too friendly? Maybe I should have just suffered through a day's ride with Shane? At this rate, she knew he wouldn't be the first to speak and she guessed that if she wanted to get a word out of him, she'd have to make the first move.
"Everything alright, Daryl?" She asked evenly, trying not to appear coddling, as he struck her as the type of guy to find that annoying. Her question appeared to catch him off guard and he squinted at her,
"What? Yeah." He replied defensively.
"It just seems like there's something bothering you."
"That ain't none of yer' business if I do." He snapped back at her and Tess sighed. He did have a point, she didn't know him and for all she knew, she'd never even crossed his mind. It was stupid of her to think that she was taking up any space in his mind.
"You're right, I didn't mean to overstep." She responded, trying to placate him. Perhaps he was upset about Merle? Seeing the group mourn for their dead yesterday, when no one ever acknowledged his loss would be enough to upset anybody. She still thought it admirable of him to put his feelings on the back burner for the good of the group.
"I'm sorry about Merle." She began gently, "I'm sorry we never found him and that we stopped looking. I wish we could have done more." She was honest about that too. Regardless of what people might have thought about Merle, he had someone that cared about him and that someone didn't know if he was dead or alive.
Daryl's vice grip on the steering wheel lessened and he turned to face Tess, properly seeing her for the first time since yesterday afternoon. She looked sincere and Daryl wasn't sure what it was he was feeling at the moment and certainly didn't know what to say. Not a lot of people liked Merle, hell, even he didn't like Merle sometimes, so it was strange to have someone wanting to look out for him. He just nodded at Tess in agreement and the tension from earlier in the day ebbed away.
Tess was satisfied with his response, knowing it had been unlikely to get anything more than that out of him. She was just happy that he no longer seemed angry and it made the car ride much more enjoyable.
—
Around midday, the convoy had pulled over to allow Jim out of the RV. He wasn't gonna last until the CDC, that much was clear and he wanted to be able to go out on his terms, under the shade of a tall oak tree. It was a somber farewell, all of them aware of what was to come of him. Jacqui seemed the most upset out of anybody and Tess wondered if they had known each other prior to the outbreak. Jim, having had time to come to terms with his fate, was calm and ready. He was satisfied with the fact that he would finally be able to see his wife again and was more than prepared to let go.
Rick tried to offer him a pistol, giving him the opportunity to go out as the man he was but Jim denied him, telling him that it would be more useful to the group than in his dying hands. It was a sad affair, one which Tess felt was not for her and she stood quietly at the back of the group in solidarity, allowing those closest to Jim to say goodbye and only leaving once others started to move back to their vehicles. To her surprise, Daryl was the last person to leave Jim's side and when he got back to the truck, he looked quietly moved by the whole situation. This man continued to mystify her.
—
Just as Tess guessed, the group didn't reach the CDC until days end. It was nearing nightfall and everyone was anxious to reach shelter as quickly as possible. They had to park a few hundred yards away from the building, due to the pile up of stranded vehicles and the deserted army barricade and that right there was enough to tell Tess that Fort Benning would most definitely have a lost cause. As the group hurried toward the building, they were met with locked and shuttered doors. The group began to panic around her and then the walkers came, drawn in by their frantic cries. Shane and Rick began to argue. Shane was adamant that Rick had doomed them all and that they never should have come here.
Tess tried not to pay attention to the bickering, instead focusing her attention to the walkers closing in on them at a steady pace. She scoped out the heads of those that were getting to close and quickly and quietly dispatched them with her rifle. She could hear Lori now, begging her husband to come up with a plan and Tess felt bad for Rick, the survival of the group weighing heavy on his shoulders. More walkers continued to approach than Tess could put down and Daryl was quick to jump in and help but even with the two of them, their efforts seemed pointless.
"Rick! I really hate to hurry you buddy but we need to do something!" She called out behind her, trying not to sound too panicked but she could tell her voice betrayed her. Rick was banging his fists desperately on the metal shutters now, screaming what sounded like nonsense, convinced he'd seen the security camera above them move.
"You're killing us!" Rick cried out in anguish, the thought that he had led his family and the people that trusted him to their death weighing heavy on his mind. As the walkers continued to close in and surround them, their backs against the wall, the shutters finally opened and a bright light blinded all those looking towards the door.
As everyone began to frantically pile into the building, Tess kept her eyes on the walkers, instinctively pushing Daryl towards the entrance and to safety and bringing up the rear. Spraying one last round of bullets, she raced into the building. Her heart was racing and her breathing heavy, adrenaline coursing through her and she took a few deep breaths to bring her heart rate back down to normal. The room was quiet and Tess turned away from the door to see what was happening. On the balcony above them stood a man in a lab coat holding an assault rifle.
"What do you want?" He called out and Tess looked up at him incredulously. What the hell did he think they wanted? Butter?!
"A chance." Rick begged, cradling Carl under his arm.
"That's a lot to ask these days." The doctor replied, trailing off. His eyes moved over the group and settled on the kids, a look of compassion crossing his features. "You all submit to a blood test. That's the price of admission." Everyone was but all too happy to agree to his condition, not questioning it.
"You got stuff to bring in, you do it now. Once this door closes, it stays closed." T-Dog, Shane and Rick quickly grabbed some bags that had been dropped just outside the door and raced back inside before the shutters closed for a final time. Tess didn't like the sound of the finality in the man's choice of words but everyone around her was breathing a sigh of relief. The sheriff offered his hand to the doctor in a gesture of goodwill.
"I'm Rick Grimes." His voice was firm but gracious. The doctor shook his hand,
"Doctor Edwin Jenner." He seemed hesitant and uncertain but led the group towards a service elevator nonetheless. They all crowded into the tight space and Carol looked visibly uncomfortable. Tess sent a look her way as if to ask if she were okay but the woman just sent her a nervous smile in return. As the elevator descended, Daryl eyed Jenner warily,
"Doctors always go 'round packin' heat like that?" He inquired.
"They were everywhere…" Jenner replied vaguely, returning Daryl's look of skepticism. "I familiarized myself." Daryl nodded, accepting his answer at face value. Tess could understand the desire to want to protect oneself but everything in here seemed secure. Maybe it wasn't Fort Knox but she highly doubted anyone was going to be breaking in any time soon. Jenner must have noticed that Daryl wasn't the only skeptical one in the group and tried to lighten the mood.
"But you all look harmless enough. Except for you." He looked down at Carl and the young boy's eyes widened in surprise. "I'll have to keep my eye on you." A wave of laughter washed over the group and when the elevator finally came to a halt, they followed him further to get their blood tested.
"Are we underground?" Carol asked nervously.
"Claustrophobic?" Jenner replied and she nodded back. "Try not to think about it." Tess rolled her eyes at the less than helpful advice and reached out to give Carol a comforting squeeze on the shoulder, which was received gratefully. As Jenner led them down a series of hallways, he explained to them that they were currently in the offices section of the building and that the housing unit had been powered down to conserve power.
"There's sofas, games and books if you want something to do. We've got plenty of food too, so we can have dinner once we've got this all out of the way. I'm sure you guys are hungry." The reply of rumbling stomachs was all the confirmation Jenner needed. "You're welcome to anything you find in any of the offices, clothes, toiletries, what have you. I only ask that you don't turn on anything that isn't already on." It seemed like a fair enough deal and everyone nodded. "We still have the showers hooked up though, so you're welcome to those as well." An excited chatter broke out throughout the group and it was funny how such a thing they took for granted not too long ago was now such a luxury.
"Alright, who's up first?"
Rick, and Lori went in with Carl to get their blood drawn and Carol and Sophia went in together once they were done. Everyone else went in solo, one at a time. Dale had been trying to coax Andrea into talking to him but she was determined to be left alone and refused to speak, continuing to wallow in her grief. Glenn was waiting beside Tess and she could tell he was nervous. It was only him, her, Jaqui and T-Dog left and he was next. She smirked at him at little and couldn't help but tease him,
"I thought you were fine with blood?"
"But the needle…" He groaned and Tess suppressed a laugh as he got called in. She gave him two thumbs up for encouragement as he trudged into the lab and she waited to be called in. It didn't take long and soon enough Tess found herself sitting in the same chair Glenn had been in just moments ago.
"Those were some impressive moves earlier," Jenner said out of the blue and Tess was surprised to learn that he'd been watching. "You military?"
"I was. But I don't really think there's much of that left anymore." She winced a little bit as the needle pierced her skin.
"No, I think you're right. The blockade here didn't last more than a couple weeks."
"I was stationed at Harrison Memorial. I lost my entire unit." Jenner looked at her sadly but with understanding and Tess wondered if he'd lost people too.
"I'm sorry to hear that." Was all he said as he placed a band-aid on her arm. "You're good to go. I just need a name."
"Theresa Murphy."
"Thank you for your service, Theresa."
—
Once everyone had gotten their blood drawn and Jenner was able to clear them of any infections, he led them further into the labyrinth that was the CDC.
"Welcome to Zone 5. VI, please turn on the lights." The pitch black void before them came to life as a series of lights turned on overhead, filling the room with bright fluorescent light. Tess' jaw dropped slightly as she took in the scene before her. At the center of the room was an open circle of desktop computers and technical equipment well above any of their pay grades. At the very front of the room, filling an entire wall, was a massive black screen. Above that screen was a digital, neon red clock. The place looked like the command center for NASA or something. And it was entirely empty. Houston, we better not have a problem.
"Where is everyone?" Rick finally asked, as if he had read her mind.
"I'm it. I'm the only one left." Jenner confessed and the man looked like he'd given up. Tess approached slowly, certain he'd called out to someone to turn on the lights for him.
"Who was that you just spoke to, then? VI?"
"VI, say hello to our guests. Tell them, welcome." Jenner looked up to the ceiling as he spoke and it dawned on her what was going on here. A loud female, but distinctly not human, voice greeted them from above.
"Hello guests. Welcome."
"VI's been my only companion for weeks." The doctor told them and a lot of people appeared to seem sorry for the man.
"Is VI a robot?" Carl asked, innocently, his face full of wonder, not fully grasping the situation at hand.
"I guess you could call her that. But she's not about to walk in here like the tin man. She's a computer program. Part of the CDC network." Tess couldn't help but look around again anyway, not that she expected any T-800's to walk out but she was a little perturbed by the whole thing. A sharp clap from Jenner drew everyone's attention,
"Who's hungry?"
—
Carol, Lori and Jaqui were quick to take over the cafeteria kitchen, cooking up a storm to satisfy everybody's growing hunger. Shane and Rick ventured into the kitchen to look for booze and successfully returned with arms full of wine bottles, much to everyone's delight. Tess had never been overly fond of wine but at this point, she wasn't about to turn down a glass. A round of drinks was poured for everyone and the atmosphere immediately lightened. Even Daryl was smiling, enlivened at the prospect of finally being able to relax.
As the group buzzed with excitement and anticipation for the meal ahead, the volume of the chatter rose and soon enough, another round of drinks was being poured. Tess took her time drinking the second glass, having not particularly enjoyed the first and watched on with a smile as the group joked around like the best of friends. It was nice to see them all happy together, especially given the events of the past couple of days. They deserved this. When food started to be brought out, a series of excited hollers echoed from the men around the table and Tess laughed. All was well and things felt normal for once. Tonight was just friends having dinner and celebrating life. And celebrate they did.
Empty bottles of wine covered the table as everyone drank contentedly and when they had all had their fill of food, they remained sitting around the table sharing stories and cracking jokes. Tess had started to get a nice buzz from the wine and was feeling relaxed and open to conversation, laughing at even Shane's jokes.
"You know, in Italy, children have a little bit of wine with dinner. And in France." Dale suggested playfully, winking at Carl who seemed excited at the prospect of being included.
"Well, when Carl is in France or Italy, he can have some then." Lori argued, not fond of the idea.
"What's it gonna hurt?" Rick laughed. "Come on."
"Come on, Mom." Carl begged and Tess chuckled at the big doe eyes he put on for his mother. Lori finally caved and held up her hands in defeat.
"There you are, young lad." Dale poured him a tiny drink and Carl scooped it up eagerly, taking his first ever drink of alcohol. As he sipped the wine, his face scrunched up in disgust and everybody laughed.
"Eugh, yuck!" Carl explained with a sour expression.
"Good boy." Lori pat him on the back gently, relieved her son hadn't taken a liking to it.
"That tastes nasty!"
"Well just stick to sour pop there, bud." Chuckled Dale.
"Not you Glenn." Daryl piped up with a big smile on his face, making him look younger and less intimidating. Tess smiled at him and the group around her, happy that everyone was so at ease. Even Rick looked relaxed, which pleased her greatly, knowing the amount of stress he was under now.
"What?" Glenn gawked at the sound of his name.
"Keep drinking little man. I wanna see how red your face can get." Daryl raised his glass in jest and Glenn looked like he was about ready to be sick. Tess sipped at her wine, smirking behind her glass at the thought of Glenn trying to keep up with Daryl's drinking. Suddenly, Rick raised a glass, capturing everyone's attention.
"It seems to me we haven't thanked our host properly."
"Here's to you, Doc. Booyah!" Daryl cried out and Tess laughed, joining in with the toast,
"Booyah!" Jenner waved their praises and thanks away, not feeling worthy of them. The entire mood of the evening changed when Shane spoke up, having fallen silent after dinner, deep in thought.
"So when are you gonna tell us what the hell happened here, Doc? All the… the other doctors that were supposed to be figuring out what happened, where are they?" His voice was cold and serious and all the positive energy in the room deflated instantly.
"Shane…we're celebrating." Rick protested, "You don't need to do this now."
"Whoa, wait a second. This is why we're here, right? This was your move… Supposed to find all the answers. Instead we- we found him. Found one man. Why?"
Shane was giving Rick attitude now and Tess was watching him through narrowed eyes, not impressed by his timing. This was the one night any of them had felt normal in a very long time. Hell, even Andrea was drinking with them and had managed to crack a few smiles. She couldn't understand why he suddenly had to go and ruin it. Jenner seemed apprehensive to respond at first but started talking.
"Well, when things got bad, a lot of people just left. Went off to be with their families. And when things got worse, when the military cordon got overrun, the rest bolted."
"Everyone?" Tess asked, surprised that nobody other than Doctor Jenner had been willing to stick around and try to find a cure.
"No, many couldn't face walking out the door. They... opted out. There was a rash of suicides. That was a bad time."
"But you stayed? Why?" Rick asked, intrigued by the doctor's response.
"I just kept working." Jenner shrugged, "Hoping to do some good." Tess could relate to that feeling. It was hard to turn away from what you knew, especially if you thought you'd had the opportunity to do some good. That's mainly why she'd offered to help Rick in the beginning. Suddenly, Daryl groaned,
"Dude, you are such a buzzkill, man." And it was true, the joyful atmosphere had definitely died an immediate death.
Lori and Carol got their kids to go to bed and said goodnight to those at the table. Andrea left soon after, Dale trailing after her like a concerned parent. The rest of the group remained at the table for a bit but were quick to move on when Jenner told them there were cots in storage and reminded them about the showers. As everyone eagerly took off to either get in first at the showers or claim a bed, Tess stayed seated, wanting to talk to the doctor before she turned in for the night.
"Why did you let us in?" She asked him curiously. Jenner appeared to have been caught off guard by her question and frowned at her.
"You asked me to?"
"But you didn't have to. You could have walked away and we would have never known." Jenner looked deep in thought for a moment, his eyes set on the table but simply shrugged,
"It seemed like the right thing to do."
"I don't buy that. Sure, maybe part of you thought that. You're human. But blood tests on entry? What were you looking for?" Her mind was racing now, causing her to become more and more distrusting of Doctor Jenner.
"If you wanted to know whether we were infected, you could have just checked us for bites." Jenner had locked eyes on her now, waves of guilt, frustration and indifference appearing on his face. What isn't he telling us?
"You said you were stationed at Harrison Memorial?" Tess nodded slowly in confirmation. "How much did the doctors tell you?" She was confused now, unsure where this was heading.
"Well, very little, they didn't know much. Don't get bit, don't get scratched. Go for the head. But you didn't need to be a doctor to know that."
"No, you're right. To be honest with you, we still don't know very much." Jenner's admission caused Tess' pulse to quicken anxiously and a sinking feeling set into her stomach. So what was he still doing here?
"Did you ever have any patients that.. came back and you thought they'd never been bit? Maybe they came in for something completely irrelevant from before the outbreak. Maybe someone on end-of-life-care?"
Tess frowned and thought back to the hospital when she remembered the elderly woman she'd had to put down, back on that fateful day when everything changed. Jenner must've been able to read on her face that someone had come to mind because he suddenly got very serious and spoke in a hushed tone,
"You know they weren't bit. I was never going to get another chance to test my theory on a group. My blood alone couldn't confirm it. I'm sorry." Tess' blood ran cold at his insinuation, her mind racing a million miles a second, trying to comprehend what she was being told. Shakily, she asked him the all important question,
"And our blood… Did it confirm your theory?"
Jenner just stared at her sadly, unable to speak but it was all the confirmation she needed. Hurriedly getting to her feet, the chair legs screeching against the hard floor, she scooped up her bag and removed herself from the room for fear of either breaking down or blowing up at the doctor.
She didn't have a destination in mind but was swiftly storming down the hallways at pace, mulling the situation over in her head again and again. If what he was saying was true then that only meant… Tess shook her head vigorously, unable to accept the reality of the situation. Panic was starting to settle in and she could feel her breathing become shallow and rapid. The tight feeling she knew all too well returned to her chest and she stormed into an office on her left, hoping one of these doctors had a penchant for hard liquor. We're all so fucked, she thought to herself, despondently.
When the first office turned up empty, she moved on to the next but failed to find anything there either. Did none of these bastards drink?! Tearing through a third office and only coming across a small plastic 50ml bottle of Fireball Whiskey, Tess groaned miserably and slumped down into the desk chair. Her leg was bouncing out of stress and she pulled her hair over her face and groaned some more.
—
Daryl was walking the hallways, trying to find somewhere to sleep away from everyone else when he heard crashing coming from one of the rooms at the end of the hall. He crept silently toward the sound, his backpack slung over one shoulder and crossbow over the other. It sounded like either someone was ransacking the place or a walker was stuck. He wasn't sure which option was preferable.
Stepping into the doorway of the dimly lit office, he was surprised to see Tess rummaging through the desk drawers, looking for something. He didn't say anything at first, just watching closely trying to figure out what she was looking for. When she pulled out a tiny bottle of liquor and fell into a heap in the chair, he caught himself before he laughed. So that's what you're after. Instead, he cleared his throat and asked her,
"The hell're you doin'?" Tess jumped, startled, and looked up at him with wide eyes, bits of hair caught in the corners of her mouth as she gaped at him. She quickly pulled herself together and pushed her hair out of her face.
"The hell are you doing?" She retorted defensively, and Daryl didn't miss the way she winced at how childish her response was. He was definitely still walking a thin line between coherent and drunk and any other time he probably would have found her reply annoying but right now he just thought it was funny. A smile threatened to break through his frown and he forced his mouth back into a straight line. Simply shrugging at her, he dumped his crossbow and backpack onto the table in front of him. Unzipping his bag, he pulled out a large, mostly full bottle of amber liquid.
"Where did you find that?" Tess gawked, impressed and annoyed that she hadn't been so lucky. She'd gotten to her feet now and was making her way towards him.
"Janitor's closet."
"Seriously? All I got was some teenager's idea of heavy drinking." She complained, tossing the bottle of Fireball onto the table.
"It ain't that bad." Daryl smirked and shrugged one shoulder.
"Well then you're welcome to it." She said offhandedly but suddenly turned more serious and held her hand over the tiny bottle like a cage.
"But it'll cost ya." She looked him dead in the eye and Daryl felt frozen under her gaze, released only when her eyes darted to the bottle of bourbon playfully.
"Have at it." He replied, too caught up in his inner monologue to care how one-sided the deal was. He was debating with Merle in his head like he was the devil on his shoulder. It's the alcohol, he told himself, knowing Merle wouldn't buy it.
Tess was back in the desk chair now. She'd taken a deep swig from the bottle and swallowed it slowly, savoring the slow burn as it traveled down her throat and into her stomach. The liquor was a comfort that she'd tried not to rely on before but she couldn't exactly book a meeting with her therapist so that she could talk through her feelings, so this would have to do. And it definitely worked.
With another mouthful she immediately started to feel better and focused less and less on her worries. As she placed the bottle on the desk, she looked up at Daryl, who hadn't moved and was watching her stoically. She raised an eyebrow at him,
"Are you joining me or are you just judging me?" She asked, only partly joking.
"I ain't judgin'." He replied, pulling himself out of his thoughts.
"Good. You wanna take a seat then?" She gestured towards another desk chair and Daryl finally sat down, accepting the bottle as he passed it to her.
"Wine doesn't really cut it, does it?" She said, not expecting an answer and laid back in the chair. Her mind was quieter now and she could finally breathe normally again, subconsciously taking a deep sigh of relief.
"You claustrophobic too or somethin'?" Daryl asked her, trying to understand why she'd been so frantic before.
"Claustrophobic? No, I'm fine." She shook her head and stared up at the ceiling. "I just needed a drink."
"A-ha…" Daryl looked at her skeptically and she finally looked over to him again.
Should I tell him? She thought about it for a while, weighing up the good it may do, versus the harm it would do. On the one hand he deserved to know, it did affect all of them after all but she could just imagine what his reaction would probably be. He'd probably head right for Jenner and God only knows how that would end. She decided against it. Now wasn't the right time. She'd tell them all eventually but only once things had settled down a bit. She knew Daryl could tell that something was up though and wasn't buying her 'I just needed a drink' excuse. She had to come up with some reason for her behavior and the most obvious excuse also wasn't entirely a lie either. But she didn't think she was up for sharing that with someone she hardly knew.
"Okay, you got me, I am claustrophobic." Daryl frowned and remained silent and she figured he probably still didn't believe her. She knew she hadn't sounded very convincing. "I'm good right now, though. You don't need to hold my hand, so you can relax." She jested, trying to break the air of seriousness that hovered over them. Daryl merely grunted and took another drink.
"Good." Was all he said and returned the bottle to her.
She huffed sharply, expressing a laugh and accepted the bottle gratefully. She didn't know what sort of response she had expected from him but he never failed to disappoint with his minimal choice of words. Taking a couple deep swigs from the bottle she left it on the desk for him and stood up.
"I'm gonna call it a night. You enjoy the Fireball." She picked up her bag and moved to the door. "See you tomorrow."
"G'night." He replied, looking at her with an unreadable expression.
"Goodnight, Daryl."