Victoria awoke late the next morning, finding herself longing for even more sleep when she peeled her eyes open. Moving onto her other side, she moved her hand to her pillow, eyes still firmly closed. She almost forgot that Homelander had stayed the night before, but as soon as her hand made contact with the pillow, it sunk into it. He was gone. She frowned, peeling her eyes open and adjusting to the light. Looking around, she propped herself onto her elbows. The room was empty. There was no sign of his suit either, the clothes she had lent him the night before in their place.

She felt her limbs ache as she moved from the bed. Pushing herself to her feet, she tugged at her pyjama bottoms. She moved them further up her waist and straightened out the long-sleeved shirt she wore. The cotton material was soft against her skin, making her wonder if she could spend the entire day just wearing that and not going out. Moving out from the bedroom, Victoria's bare feet padded into the kitchen.

Michelle and Daniella were already awake, both of them stood over the stove and talking in hushed tones. Victoria gathered her hair into one hand and dropped her locks over her shoulders and down her back. "Morning," she said, announcing her arrival.

"Hey, sleepyhead!" Daniella turned around and beamed, holding a mixing bowl in her hands.

"What time is it?" Victoria wondered, settling herself down onto the middle stool at the breakfast bar.

"Well…it's gone one in the afternoon," Michelle said.

She was wearing her gym gear, her hair tied up and piled at the back of her head. Her cheeks were slightly flushed and she was cradling a bottle of water in her hands.

"What?" Victoria exclaimed.

"You slept for about fourteen hours," Daniella said. "We didn't want to wake you and so we just left you. Homelander left at about ten this morning."

"Yeah," Victoria said.

She wasn't surprised. She had been deflated that he had been gone when she woke up, but now that she knew what time it was, it made sense. No doubt he had things that needed to be done which didn't include staying in bed with her while she slept.

"He did tell us that he would be back tonight once he'd gotten all of his work at Vought out of the way with," Michelle said. "So, he stayed with you last night, huh?"

"Just sleeping," Victoria said to them, not wanting to say much more on the matter. She didn't entirely know what was going on between them other than both of them agreeing to take things slow. Victoria knew that she owed him an explanation. "I asked him if he wanted to stay and he said that he would."

"Hey, we're happy for you," Daniella promised her, pouring some batter into the heated pan. "And he seems utterly besotted with you. You should have seen how he was when he found out you'd been taken. He was so upset."

"Really?" Victoria asked and Michelle poured her a glass of orange juice from the fridge, sliding it over to her. She then pulled out her phone and began typing before placing it down on the breakfast bar. She hit play on the video while Daniella continued making the pancakes, focusing on not letting any of them burn.

"I say this to anyone listening who knows where Victoria might be," Homelander's voice filled the kitchen. Victoria's gaze remained fixed on the screen, looking at him as the lights of cameras flashed on him, dozens of microphones placed in front of him. He looked around the room, eyes scanning the journalists involved in the press conference. "Bring her back to me. Bring her back to her friends. She is a smart, kind, loving young woman and she has a bright future ahead of her. She has a PhD to finish. She has a graduation to attend. She wants to try and change laws for the better. There isn't a bad bone in her body and I have seen that. Alongside a bright career, she…I want to see what a future with her looks like. I will have it, too. I will find her and I won't stop at anything to bring her home safe. So, Victoria, if you can hear me, know that I will do that. I will do that for you."

The video finished as Homelander walked away and Michelle pressed the home button on her phone, locking it again and slipping onto the stool next to Victoria's.

"Shit," Victoria whispered, struggling to comprehend what she had just listened to. That had felt pretty intense. It was almost too much for a man who barely told her anything about his feelings and preferred to hide behind snarky comments to most people.

"Yeah, that's what we thought," Daniella agreed, flipping the pancake and then quickly grabbing the maple syrup and bananas she had cut up and dropped into a bowl. She placed them on the breakfast bar. "He's so besotted with you that I don't think this is a contract anymore. I think both of you might be beyond that."

"I don't think it, I know it," Michelle said confidently and took a sip of her bottled water as Victoria turned the glass of juice around in her fingers, focused on the orange liquid inside of the glass. "You like him and there's nothing wrong with that. It's fine to care about him. You're allowed to get close to someone who isn't us."

"In fact, it would be healthy if you did," Daniella agreed and picked out a slice of banana, popping it into her mouth and chewing down on it. "You know that we appreciate you for opening up to us and telling us everything that happened to you."

"Because we know it wasn't easy," Michelle agreed.

"But you also deserve someone to love you-"

"-He doesn't love me," Victoria quickly said with a firm shake of her head. "He probably will never love me after a while. I don't even know why we're doing this. We're not compatible. He's going to come to that realisation and when he does then he will break up with me."

"Vic, that's not healthy," Daniella said to her, voice slightly firm as she went to take charge of the situation as only she usually could. Shaking her head back and forth quickly, she placed a pancake onto one of the three laid out plates before serving it to Victoria.

"Dani is right," Michelle told her, rubbing a hand up and down her back. "That's not healthy and if you keep thinking like that then you'll never be able to be happy with someone. So what if he's a supe? He'd be lucky to be with you. Have you met yourself? You're smart, funny, ridiculously hard-working…you are everything and he'd be an idiot not to see that."

"But I think he does see that," Daniella said to her and she went back to adding batter to the pan, making another pancake. "In fact, I think he sees it more than you do."

"I just…it scares me," Victoria confessed. "I told you both about everything only after a year of living together and I trust you both explicitly because I know that you would never hurt me. I don't know that about him. He could turn round to me one day and do that if I actually let myself fall for him. He…I think that he could probably break my heart if he wanted to."

"And if he doesn't want to?" Daniella queried, grabbing hold of her spatula once more and tossing her pancake again. "You'll never know if you don't try and I think you do want to try. I think you do want to open up to him."

"I do," she said, not denying it.

"Then just take it slow. You don't need to tell him everything straight away. Just take your time with him and you know that we'll always be here for you. We'll always be around and you'll have us."

"Exactly," Daniella agreed and headed over to the breakfast bar. "Besides, we have a paper to finish writing together."

Michelle laughed as Daniella tried to lighten the situation, sensing that Victoria needed it. There was only so long she could cope with a heavy conversation. She looked to Daniella who picked up another slice of banana and popped it into her mouth. She gave her a knowing smile and Daniella winked to her.

…

Victoria had told Homelander that she would go over to his penthouse that night. She'd spent the day in the apartment and needed some fresh air. Daniella and Michelle had insisted on walking with her to the penthouse on the autumnal evening. Victoria promised that she wouldn't be back late and that she had her phone on her. They were being protective, Victoria knew that. They were hovering around her like concerned parents. She loved them for it, but she wanted them to be sure that she wouldn't break. She would be fine. But she had to confess that a part of her was still jumpy as they headed on over to Vought Tower, looking around concerned that something might go wrong. But she knew that she would be fine. She had to be fine because she wasn't going to let what had happened have an impact on her life. She was stronger than that. She was stronger than she gave herself credit for.

Once Victoria was at the penthouse, Homelander having given her the code, she stepped into the space and found him in the kitchen. There was a strong smell of mushrooms and white wine. Victoria sniffed and the doors closed behind her.

"Homelander?" she called out.

"In the kitchen," he retorted.

She guessed that much. Heading through the doorway to the kitchen, she found him stood behind his marble breakfast bar. He looked to her with a wide smile on his face, his hands motioning to the food on the surface. "I cooked us dinner," he said and Victoria's eyes widened as she looked at the mushroom risotto. She tucked her hair behind her ears and stepped forwards, shrugging out of the long, red coat she wore.

She draped it over one of the leather stools at the breakfast bar and placed her small leather bag on the ground next to it, pulling her phone out from it and leaving it on the surface in case Daniella and Michelle called her. She looked onto the food and inhaled the smell of it as Homelander poured her a glass of wine. She took it into her hands and he pulled out the stool for her.

"How was your day?" he asked as she sipped the wine and then set it down behind her plate.

"Good," she said. "I ended up staying in with Michelle and Daniella. They made pancakes…insisted on us not doing much…it was nice."

"So…you haven't seen the news?" Homelander asked her and took the seat next to hers.

She grabbed hold of the fork and picked it up, dipping it into the risotto and taking a mouthful. She shook her head as Homelander picked up his own fork and moved some of his food around for a moment or two.

"No," she said. "They've kept me away from it."

"Well, that's good," Homelander said to her, nodding his head. "It's just been a constant news cycle of people speculating on what happened to you. I'm amazed you got here without a media circus following you."

"We went out the back way," Victoria told him. "Plus, Michelle and Daniella did a good job of walking with me in the middle like a pair of bodyguards."

He chuckled. "They're protective," he confirmed.

"They're the best," Victoria concurred with him, taking another mouthful of risotto. And then she broached the topic. "And they also showed me the video of the press conference you gave too."

"Ah," he simply said. "You've seen that?"

"Sure have," Victoria said and sipped on her wine. "It was quite something. I mean, I know that a lot of it was probably for the cameras, but it was nice."

"No," Homelander shook his head at her. "It wasn't all for the cameras, I mean. I meant what I said. When it comes to you, I really did mean it all."

"It was nice," was all that Victoria could think to say.

He finished chewing and then looked to her, head tilted and lips arched. "Nice?" he asked from her and she glanced down again. This was his issue with her. She was great at initially confessing her feelings, but then she always went quiet. She struggled to go deeper. And he wanted her to go deeper. She had berated him for not opening up, but she really did struggle to do the same.

"More than nice," she decided on saying. "I've never heard anyone talk about me like that before, and Michelle and Daniella don't count."

Chuckling, he nodded, agreeing on that point. "Well, I'd say it all again, but I'm hoping that I never have to go in front of a camera and do it. In the meantime, I've asked for your privacy to be respected and you have the following week away from public engagements, so you can just rest."

Victoria swallowed another sip of wine, but shook her head. "I can't," she said to him. "I've got the conference coming up next week and I emailed my supervisor to say that I would be in on Tuesday to continue work on it and talk about my thesis."

"You're sure that you should be going back to work?" he questioned.

"I need to try and get back to normal, right?" she replied. "And this is my normal."

"Just don't rush into things too soon if you need more time," he urged from her and she shook her head. She wouldn't do that. She needed to work. She liked the distraction it gave her and, for such a long time, it had been all that she'd had. "And I'd still like to come to your talk, if you'll have me."

"Of course," she said to him, nodding her head and folding one leg over the other as she placed her fork down. She took a bit of a food break, her hands tugging at the red short skirt she wore over her thick black tights, a long black shirt tucked into it. "I might even need some hints on how to be a better public speaker. You can read my talk if you like."

"Really?"

"Sure, you're better at this than I ever would be."

"And you never want to get better at it?" Homelander asked her. "You've not thought about being in the limelight?"

"Absolutely not," Victoria promised him. "I mean, I would like to get better at speaking in public without feeling like I'm going to throw up, but I don't want what you have. I don't want this life that you have…but…I know that if I'm going to be with you then I have to get used to it. But this right here…nights like tonight…for me they're better than any public event."

He remained mute. He didn't know if he felt the same way. He liked being the one who commanded attention. He needed it. But he did have to confess that there were some days when he did need to be alone, when he didn't want the act. "I get it," he said to her and he guessed that he did.

They finished their meal and Victoria insisted on tidying everything up. He had protested, but she had done it anyway, scraping plates clean and placing them into the dishwasher before they went into the living room and sat on the large brown couch, still talking to each other despite the TV playing in the background. It was almost eleven and Victoria knew that she should think about getting home.

"Or, alternatively, you can stay here," Homelander said once she had said she should go.

"I hardly have anything here," she replied. "Scrap that, I have nothing here."

"Does it matter? I can loan you some clothes and have you back early tomorrow morning," he said and Victoria bit down on her bottom lip. She remembered what Daniella and Michelle had said to her that morning. And so she nodded and that seemed to make him happy.

"Come on then," he said and Victoria followed him upstairs, grabbing her phone and bag on the way. She quickly messaged the group chat while climbing the spiral staircase. His room was massive, a large king-sized bed in the middle of it with a grey material headboard against a dark blue painted wall. There was a walk-in wardrobe and a massive marble bathroom with grey tiles and gold trim. The large window had curtains pulled back, a chair sat to the corner with a lamp over it.

"This is massive," Victoria commented, putting her phone on top of the dresser and leaving her bag by the chair.

"Glad you approve," he said to her and went into the walk-in wardrobe that had roughly twenty-five copies of his suit. He had hardly worn normal clothes in years, but he still had some. He picked out a grey t-shirt and joggers, throwing them onto the bed for her. "They should be fine, I imagine."

"Thanks," Victoria said and she picked up the t-shirt and joggers before spotting it. She left the joggers on the bed. Holding the t-shirt up, she looked to the sleeves and her throat clenched for a moment. "It's short sleeved," she commented.

His brow furrowed. "Yeah, is that a problem?" he wondered. He knew it was. He knew how he had never seen her wear anything but long sleeves.

Victoria tucked her hair behind her ear and sat down at the end of the pristinely made bed, one leg folded underneath her bum and she held the grey cotton in her fingers, squeezing it tightly. Homelander headed on over to sit down across from her.

"I…you know that I never wear short sleeves, right?" she checked and he nodded. "Well, there's a reason for that."

He watched her for a few moments, wondering if she was finally going to open up to him. He needed to give her time. He needed to be the one to let her feel as though she was in control. She moved closer to him and held her arm out, resting it over his lap. He glanced down at her and she nodded her head, silently giving him permission to do what he wanted to do. He pulled his gloves from his hands and tossed them to the side.

His fingers ran to the cuff of her shirt, slowly rolling the material up and over her pale skin. He noted how the hairs on her arm stood on edge and her pulse began to race. She was anxious. He moved the material to her elbow and picked her wrist up, turning it over so that he could see them clearer. There were scars dotted on her pale skin, about ten of them, round and faded but clear. Keeping a hand on her wrist, his other hand went to run over one of them, his touch soft and steady.

"He would go out to the pub for hours," Victoria said, her voice a low whisper and her eyes set on where his finger was running over her soft skin. "And he would always come back drunk…completely and utterly drunk…I…I was thirteen the first time he hit me. Mum tried to stop him. She tried to tell him to leave me alone, but he just hit her. The hitting I could handle. Eventually, I just stopped reacting. I let him hit me. But I think he wanted a reaction. I think he wanted me to fight back."

He kept quiet, his eyes moving to her face and seeing how she was looking down, her eyes glazed over and her bottom lip wobbling. He didn't say anything, letting her continue to tell him the tale.

"That was when he started to burn me. He got a reaction then," Victoria said to him. "He'd always have a cigarette when he got back from the pub…when he was drunk. Mum tried to stop him, but she couldn't."

She sniffed, shaking her head and then looking to him. Her gaze met his and his eyes widened, watching her and seeing, for the first time, the broken young woman behind the façade. He saw the real her. He saw that she was damaged, just like him. He finally saw it and he wondered if he could put her back together. Could he help her? Could he actually help her?

"And that's what he did to you?"

"It's what he did to me," Victoria said and Homelander wondered what more there could possibly be. What else had she gone through?

"There was someone else?" he queried.

"I promise that I will tell you everything," Victoria said, hand going to his chest as he moved closer to him, her fingers touching against his neck. "But all of it…for you to know all of it…I can't do it all tonight."

"Okay," Homelander said, agreeing with her and not pushing her. It wouldn't achieve anything. He would just cause her to close herself off to him even more. "It's alright, Vic. You…thank you for telling me this. Thank you for that."

She nodded once, gulping and then feeling his hand run up and down her arm, the feeling of his bare skin against hers enough to make her shudder.

"And these," he said to her, "they don't define you, alright? And you don't have to cover them up around me. You don't need to hide them from me because, if anything, they show just how strong you are. You survived this. You came out stronger. But thank you. Thank you for trusting me."

She could only nod her head and she moved a hand to his cheek. He let her take control and guide his face down towards her own, pressing her lips to his and kissing him tenderly. She closed her eyes, relishing the feel of his soft lips over hers as she kept the kiss brief and chaste. He also found his own eyes closing, his chest deflating as he swept his tongue over her bottom lip and handled her delicately, a hand cupping the back of her head. Her lips were plump and he fought the urge to be rougher with her, knowing that wasn't what she wanted or needed that night. He decided to pull away from her slowly and they parted, her hand remaining against his chest and his tangled in her hair, brushing through it slowly and softly.

"Thank you for making me feel that I can trust you," she settled on saying to him and kissed him once more.

…

Victoria had thrown herself back into work and everything seemed to be going perfectly. Everything in her life felt like it should be. Winter was fast approaching and there was no sign of danger after what had earlier happened. She had been talking to a therapist at Vought after the kidnapping. It wasn't like she'd had a say, Madelyn had forced her to do it and it had seemed to help her. She no longer jumped whenever something startled her or felt scared going out alone.

There were things she wasn't prepared to do still, like going out at night and she preferred being around crowds. She'd been involved in numerous publicity events with Homelander, finding herself on the cover of more magazines and involved in more TV interviews, but it wasn't as heavy as it was when they had first started dating. Michelle and Daniella were busy as well, Daniella with her girlfriend and Michelle had once again started online dating. Alongside that, they were working on a research project together alongside their thesis' and they were happy.

Homelander had come to watch Victoria deliver her opening remarks at her conference. She had been apprehensive, but he had stayed backstage. That didn't mean that a photo hadn't been leaked of the two of them when she had finished her speech and embraced him around the back of the building. She had no idea that it had been staged, Homelander once again portrayed as a supporting boyfriend who wanted to help her with her career.

"I've been thinking," Homelander said as they walked through Central Park together, the sky turning white and threatening to snow. There were Christmas decorations everywhere, lights twinkling around and people dressed in thick coats and numerous layers. Homelander looked slightly out of place in his suit, but he was doing what he could to ignore the crowds and give Victoria his full attention.

"And what have you been thinking?" she wondered.

"Well, you said that Michelle was going back to her parents for Christmas and Daniella was going to Georgina's parents…so that means you're alone, right?"

She shrugged. "Michelle invited me to go and spend the holidays with her parents, but I didn't want to impose. I went the previous year."

"In that case, why don't we spend Christmas together? I've got that Christmas party on Christmas Eve, but after that, I'm free until the twenty-sevent. We could head off to my cabin outside of New York…be away from cameras…people…just have a quiet Christmas together. What do you say?" he asked from her and Victoria startled.

"You're serious?" she asked him, her hand remaining firmly inside of his, holding tight. "You want to spend Christmas together?"

"Why not?" he asked. "I'm alone. You're alone. I thought that it would make sense."

"You're sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure," he laughed and she lifted a free hand to adjust the red checked scarf she wore over her thick red coat. She had a bobble hat on top of her head too. The heels of her ankle boots clicked on the floor as they walked slowly. She moved around a puddle, extending their entwined arms so that she didn't go into it. "Why? Are you not?"

"I would like that," Victoria said with a genuine smile. "I just wondered what this meant. Are you going to be stuffing a turkey? Decorating a tree?"

He laughed again. "Well, I'm not sure about that, but if you want to then we can," he promised her. "We can do whatever we want, especially after that photoshoot the other day."

Victoria rolled her eyes, knowing exactly what he was talking about. It had been a photoshoot for Housewives Monthly, which Victoria had joked sounded like a porn magazine, but was actually a magazine for housewives, detailing the best fashions and latest recipes. The interview had been with both of them on what their perfect Christmas meant. They had tried to outdo each other, sounding sickly sweet and escalating their answers on each question. Victoria had questioned the photoshoot, her dressed in dark red dress with an apron, pretending to cook in some suburban kitchen, Homelander behind her. The photo on the cover was of the two of them around a Christmas tree, Homelander hanging up a bauble and Victoria knelt on the ground, pushing a present under it.

"I think Vought owe us for that one," she agreed with him. It had been horrendously excruciating. "But sure, Christmas without them interfering sounds good."

"Perfect. We'll go straight after the Christmas Eve party. I do believe there might be plans to announce a new member of the Seven that night."

"Exciting," Victoria said and she knew that he was invested in who was going to join them. She checked the watch on her wrist and noted the time. "I've got to go. I promised Michelle and Daniella that I'd go ice-skating with them before Daniella went out to Georgina's parents."

"Of course, yeah," he said with a nod. "I'll head on back to the Tower. I'm on patrol tonight with Maeve so I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Perfect," Victoria said and he bent down to kiss her goodbye.

She stepped back as he moved into the sky, people exclaiming around them at the motion. Victoria smiled as she walked on by, keeping her head down. Wandering through Central Park, she couldn't stop smiling. It all just felt too good to be true. Christmas with him. Ice-skating with her friends. She felt like she was in some sickly rom-com movie. Laughing to herself at the thought, she buried her hands into her coat pocket and turned off the beaten track, knowing that it was quicker for her to get out of the park and back to the main road.

"You're a hard woman to get alone these days."

She froze. That voice sounded so familiar to her, even after ten years. Her shoulders tensed and her eyes closed, hands clenching into fists in her pockets. She didn't want to turn around, but she knew that she had to. She was almost tempted to shout for Homelander, hoping that he might not be too far away. But she had to deal with this. She slowly spun on her heel and looked down the path to see him stood there.

He was dressed in dark jeans with a dark shirt, a black winter coat hanging open around him. He looked haggard. He looked like time hadn't been kind to him. He moved slowly towards her and she shook her head.

"I have nothing to say to you," she said to him.

"Vicky, please-"

"-No," she interrupted him. She wasn't doing this. She wasn't going to do this. "Whatever you want…I don't care."

"I want to keep you safe."

She let out a sarcastic laugh then, tossing her head back and looking to the sky. He let her have her moment before her glare landed back on him. She shook her head and moved forwards. He let her push at his shoulder. He let her hit at him because he deserved it. He deserved her anger.

"You want to keep me safe?" she demanded from him. "You could have kept me safe twelve years ago when I needed you…when I needed you to protect me from our father…from him," she hissed the final word, unable to say his name. "You knew what he was like. You knew what he would do to us."

"I never thought he'd hurt you."

"Why? Because I was a girl?" she asked from him. "Well, turns out that you shouldn't think because you know shit. You know fuck all about what he did and if it was just dad…if it was just the beatings…the burning…I could have coped with that, but it wasn't. It wasn't."

"I didn't know what Eddie would do," he continued protesting. "I could never have known that."

"No, but you could have taken me with you when you came back. I begged you to take me with you. And you left me."

"I couldn't look after you."

"And you think that they could?" Victoria asked, every single pent-up emotion coming to the surface. She was angry. She was upset. She wanted to yell at him until her voice was hoarse. She wanted to curse him. She wanted to hurt him. "Just get away from me. I don't want your protection. I don't want anything from you."

"No, you need to listen to me," he said and he grabbed her arm before she could whirl around and walk away from him. He wasn't going to let her go so easily. But she had changed.

She moved her fingers into a fist and punched him right in the jaw. The shock of the movement took him off guard and gave her time to pull her arm free from his hold. "Leave me the hell alone or I'll scream. How long do you think it will be before Homelander turns up and I'll just let him deal with you?"

"Victoria, he's not who you think he is."

"Yeah, I know," Victoria retorted and her brother clung onto his nose, wiping away the blood with the back of his hand. "But you're exactly who I know you are so just stay the hell away from me."

She stormed off from him then and he wanted to run and follow her, but he had already caused a scene. A couple had seen them arguing and had asked Victoria if she was okay as she stormed off. She said she was fine and they glared at him, clearly weighing up if they should call the police. He didn't need that. He needed to keep a low profile and, more importantly, he couldn't let Homelander know who he was. He wondered if Victoria had told him everything and he had put the pieces together. If so, then he had to act sooner rather than later because, from what he had just observed in the park, their relationship was anything but fake. It was worse than he had feared. But she was still family and he did owe her. He had to keep her safe now because he had failed in the past. He couldn't fail her again.

...

A/N: Soooo things will start picking up in the next few chapters! As always, thank you to .Venus, nizem8 (the question about Becca will be answered shortly...) and to HomiesLazer for reviewing the prior chapter. Please do let me know your thoughts/theories - I love reading them and they help keep me motivated!