Chapter 12
Hermione POV
Hermione was understandably quite nervous. She took a deep, settling breath as the icy winter wind whipped at her cheeks, coloring them a light shade of red. Another deep breath, then she knocked on the door.
"Hermione, dear, we've been waiting for you! Come in, come in, it's freezing out!" Mrs. Weasley fussed over Hermione as she ushered her into the Burrow, taking her travel cloak, hat, and scarf off her.
"Ron! Hermione's here!" Mrs. Weasley called before turning and offering Hermione a warm smile, "Have a nice holiday with your parents?"
"Oh yes, it was – It was quite nice to get a chance to talk to them," Hermione nodded, thanking Mrs. Weasley as a cup of hot chocolate was forced into her hands.
"Ron, for goodness' sake, it's rude to keep your guest waiting!" Mrs. Weasley called out again, louder this time.
"Oi, keep your pants on, I'm coming!" Ron responded as he thundered down the stairs, "Hi," he said, giving Hermione a grin.
Hermione truly felt ill as she saw how happy Ron was to see her. She was originally supposed to stay at the Burrow for a few days at the end of Christmas holiday, but ended up extending her time with her parents so that she'd only be at the Burrow for the evening and morning before they caught the train back to Hogwarts. This was of course done on purpose, as once she broke the news to Ron, she wasn't exactly sure how welcome she'd still be in the Burrow.
"Well, I've got plenty to do, and I'm sure the two of you would like to catch up," Mrs. Weasley beamed at them, "Dinner should be ready within the hour."
"Thanks, Mum," Ron said as he took Hermione's trunk in one hand, her hand in the other, and led her up the first flight of stairs.
"Um, Ron? Would you actually mind if I rested in Ginny's room before dinner? Traveling here has taken more out of me than I thought it would. After dinner I'm all yours," she said, forcing a small smile.
Ron shrugged, seemingly unbothered, "See you at dinner, then?"
Hermione nodded before taking her trunk from Ron and walking down the hall to Ginny's room. She bumped the door open with her hip, and pulled her trunk in behind her. Just as she'd hoped, Ginny was lounging on her bed, reading a copy of The Quibbler. Upon Hermione's arrival, Ginny tossed the magazine on top of her bookcase and sat up, giving Hermione a smile.
"Thank Merlin you're here! I somehow forgot what it's like being cooped up here with just my parents and my brothers. How was your holiday at home?" she asked as Hermione sat down on the cot opposite her bed.
"It was quite productive, actually. I spent a lot of time preparing for my O.W.L.s and reading ahead for classes, and had a few nice conversations with my parents. How has your holiday been, besides enjoying quality time with your brothers…" Hermione said with a hint of sarcasm.
Ginny grinned, "Oh you know me, there's nothing more that I enjoy than letting Ron kick my arse at Wizard's Chess or being the test subject for Fred and George's latest invention."
"Have you been able to see Luna at all over the holiday?"
Ginny's grin grew, "Yes, we've spent a fair amount of time together. Though, every time I go over to her place, her dad tries to force some vile drink down my throat he's made from gurdyroot… It tastes just like the bogey-flavored Bertie Bott's bean Fred tricked me into eating when I was little… I want her dad to like me, but I'm not sure how much more of it I can take…" she chuckled as Hermione laughed. "But yes, I've seen Luna over the holiday and honestly, it's been my favorite Christmas yet because of her…" Ginny blushed just a bit and couldn't help but smile.
Hermione smiled, taking in Ginny's obvious infatuation with her girlfriend, before her smile fell at the reminder of what she was going to do at some point during the visit.
"What is it?" Ginny asked, concern now etched across her freckled face.
Hermione looked out the window, took another deep, settling breath, then looked back at Ginny, "Do you remember when you first asked me if I was snogging Ron?"
"Yes?"
"You said you didn't think we'd be a good match…"
Ginny nodded, urging Hermione on.
"Do you still think that? Do you think that Ron and I aren't a good match?"
Ginny frowned, brow slightly furrowed, "Why are you asking me this?"
"I – I'm going to break things off with Ron…"
Ginny's eyebrows raised quickly, "How come?"
Hermione could feel her cheeks heat up as a deep blush formed, "I – Um – Well I – I actually fancy someone else…"
Ginny tipped her head, "Is that so?"
Hermione nodded as she looked down at her hands, twisting them in her lap as tears began to form in her eyes. She heard Ginny get up off of her bed and pad across the wooden floorboards to sit beside her.
"Look… You don't have to say who… I just want you to know that I love you both, you and Ron, so whatever happens between the two of you, I'm here for you too…" Ginny said, putting a supportive hand on top of Hermione's.
"Thank you… I do want to tell you, though, because I don't think I can go through this without having someone to talk to…"
She felt Ginny's other hand on her back, rubbing it gently, "Alright… Well, when you're ready to – "
"It's Pansy."
The hand on Hermione's back froze, and she swore she could almost hear Ginny's brain processing what she'd just revealed.
"Pansy… As in Parkinson…?"
Hermione turned to look into Ginny's bright brown eyes and nodded, "Yes… I fancy Pansy Parkinson… Quite a lot, actually…"
Again, it felt so, so good to say out loud, but this time she was a lot more nervous about the reaction she'd get in return. Her parents knew very little about Pansy, so telling them wasn't too big of a deal, but Ginny knew a lot.
Ginny gaped at her for a moment, her mouth opening and closing as she started to say something a few times before stopping.
"I don't know where it came from… It feels like it's just been the result of so many moments building from one to the next and I just… I've never felt so understood by another person before… I mean, certainly you understand what it's like to fancy a girl…"
Ginny's face was still completely shocked, "Well, yeah, but… I feel like I'm missing a few chapters here… Since when do you fancy girls?"
Hermione blushed a bit and shrugged, "I guess since I started fancying Pansy… I've never felt this way about a girl before… Well, really, I've never felt this way about anyone before… Not the way I feel about her, at least…"
Ginny nodded lightly, "Wow… So, you're going to break things off with Ron because you fancy Parkinson? Are you planning on letting her know? Because last I checked, I've seen her more than once with her tongue down Malfoy's throat right out in the middle of any given corridor…"
Hermione quickly looked away from Ginny, but that had clearly been the wrong thing to do.
"What? Are you going to tell me that Parkinson and Malfoy aren't actually together or something?"
When Hermione looked back at Ginny, Ginny's bright brown eyes widened.
"You've got to promise me you won't tell…"
Ginny nodded, again urging Hermione to continue.
"It's an arranged relationship… Neither of them are actually interested in pursuing the other in a serious way…"
Ginny's jaw dropped slightly, "Blimey… I've heard stories about arranged relationships between purebloods, but I didn't think it was still happening today… Well, alright, so they're not actually together…"
"No, they're not…"
"I feel like I'm still missing something…"
Hermione took a deep breath, "Pansy fancies girls…"
Ginny's eyebrows shot up, "No way… Wait… So that bit with the scarf the night you two came across me and Luna in the Room of Requirement… She really was flirting with you!"
Hermione quickly shook her head, "I don't know that for sure. Nothing she's done so far could be definitively categorized as flirting, all of it could just be her being nice. Besides that, I've asked her if she fancies anyone or what girls have caught her eye, and none of what she's told me has indicated that she'd ever be interested in me… My mum said that because I've been with Ron, if she did fancy me, she wouldn't outright say it as she's likely under the impression that I'm straight, but still…"
"Your mum's got a point… Wow, Parkinson fancies girls… That's quite a get for our team, if I'm being honest…"
Hermione gave Ginny a look, "Excuse me?"
"I'm just saying… I never really thought much of her, seeing as she's always gone out of her way to be particularly cruel to me and all of my friends, including you, but no one can deny how fit she is…"
"Ginny!"
"What? I'm sure you don't disagree?"
Hermione blushed and rolled her eyes, "I don't disagree…"
Ginny chuckled before she shook her head, "Wow… So, you're going to try for Parkinson, then?"
"Ginevra, she's not an object to try and get… She's a person who I've grown quite fond of and certainly wouldn't mind getting to know on a bit of a deeper level… But I don't want to risk our friendship… I genuinely am so unsure as to if there's even a possibility of her liking me, and I'm too scared to risk losing her as a friend to find out… At least I think I am…" Hermione muttered as she put her head in her hands.
Ginny's hand was moving again on Hermione's back, rubbing soothing circles against her sweater, "Can I offer you some advice?"
"Please."
"Well, I guess it's more of a story than advice, but there's advice in there. There's not a day that goes by since Luna and I got together that I wished I'd just mustered up the nerve and courage and gone for her. Luckily, Luna's Luna, so one day she just drew me in with that beautiful smile of hers and kissed me. Said she'd always wanted to, and figured if I didn't feel the same way, our friendship was strong enough to survive it. I'd never thought of it that way, that our friendship was strong enough to withstand something like that. I'd always been too worried to ruin our friendship, but once she explained it that way, I truly believe if I'd kissed her and she hadn't felt the same way, we'd still be friends because of how strong our friendship was. Do you think your friendship with Parkinson could withstand that? Do you see her abandoning you if you admitted you fancied her?"
Hermione thought about this. Especially with how safe and cared for she'd felt by Pansy after the incident with the subpar Potions essay, she really couldn't imagine Pansy ending their friendship over something like that. If she was going to end the friendship over something like that, she would've done it already during either of the times she'd caught Hermione staring at her lips… She knew Pansy's caught her both times, and yet, nothing had changed, and they were still friends… Well, at least she hoped they were… She hadn't seen or heard from Pansy since she ran out on her after she'd caught herself staring at the girl's lips the second time… But she had called out for her when she ran off…
Hermione looked up at Ginny, "You're right… I don't think she'd end the friendship if I told her I fancied her…"
Ginny smiled, "I say you go for it… When you're ready, of course. And certainly, after you've broken things off with Ron…" she said with a bit of a wince.
Hermione exhaled heavily, "How do you think he's going to take it…"
"He likes you quite a lot, but you were friends first, so I could see him being alright eventually…"
Hermione nodded, "It's the right thing to do, but I just hate that I might be hurting him…"
Ginny nodded as well, "It's the right thing to do…"
"Girls! Dinner!" Mrs. Weasley called up the stairs.
Ginny gave Hermione a reassuring smile as she stood up, "It'll be fine, alright? No matter what, I'm here for you."
Hermione stood up and pulled Ginny into a hug, "Thanks Ginny."
"Of course."
After dinner, Hermione caught Ron alone in the sitting room rifling through a box of Wizard's Chess pieces. As she approached him, he smiled up at her, and her heart clenched. But she knew she had to do this. As much as she didn't want to hurt him, she knew it was the right thing to do.
"Fancy a game?" Ron asked.
Hermione shook her head, "No, but I need to talk to you about something…" she said as she sat down beside him on the sofa.
"Yeah…? What's up?" Ron asked, putting the box down on the coffee table before covering the restless hands in Hermione's lap with one of his large hands.
"Ron, I love you, so much… But lately I've been thinking that I – I think I may only love you as a friend…"
"Oh…" Ron said totally deflated as he pulled his hand off of Hermione's.
"I do want you to know that it isn't at all your fault… You've been such a lovely boyfriend. So kind and caring and sweet…"
"Then why can't you love me as more than a friend? Is it my looks?"
"No! Ron, honestly, it's not you. It's me. I – "
"It can't possibly be you, Hermione, you're damn near perfect… I must've done something… Or is it someone else? Do you fancy another guy?"
Hermione hesitated at the way he'd framed the question before responding, "It's not another guy… No…"
Ron's eyes were studying hers closely now, trying to read them, "I can tell you're not telling me something… Just tell me, please…"
"Ron… It's not you. You've done absolutely nothing wrong. It's me, completely, because I…"
"Because you what…?" Ron urged.
"I fancy a girl…"
"Oh…" Ron mumbled quietly, looking at Hermione in shock.
"Yeah… So… Really, not your fault…"
"Well… I guess that's better than you just not liking me… If you fancy girls… There's not really much of a chance for me, is there?" he chuckled a little as he rubbed the back of his neck, and Hermione let out the breath she didn't know she'd been holding in.
"Are you okay…?"
"I mean, I'm a bit gutted… I really like you Hermione… But if you fancy girls, what chance do I have?"
"Well, I might not only fancy girls… I have no idea… But right now, I do know that I fancy one girl in particular…"
"If you don't mind me asking… Who is it that you fancy?"
"Um… I – "
"Oh, bloody hell… Don't tell me it's Ginny!"
Hermione stared at Ron, "Why would you think it'd be Ginny?"
"Because she obviously fancies girls too! Have you ever seen the way she looks at Luna? I know I shouldn't be asking you this, but Hermione, please do me a favor and don't snog my sister… Honestly, I'd rather you steal Pansy Pureblood Parkinson away from Malfoy before you date Ginny!" Ron declared with a laugh.
Somehow Hermione managed to keep a straight face and just nodded along, "You know what, Ron, I think I can do you that favor... I promise you I'll date Pansy Parkinson before I date Ginny."
"Perfect," Ron grinned, "Hey, so when I get over you – If! If I get over you… Sorry… Could you be my wing woman? Because Harry's crap at it… I'd been trying to get him to help me with you for ages, and eventually I just had to go for it myself…"
Hermione laughed and smiled, "Sure Ron, I'll be your wing woman. If you ever manage to get over me…"
"Excellent! Well, whoever the girl is that you fancy, she's incredibly lucky," Ron grinned warmly as he took Hermione's hand in his again. "Unless, of course, it's Ginny, then – "
Hermione rolled her eyes but maintained the smile, "Ron, I promise, I'm not interested in Ginny."
"Okay, okay!" he laughed.
Hermione looked up at Ron and smiled. It felt different now, his large hand in hers, the two of them laughing and joking together. There was less pressure between them, and it felt nice. Friendly. She'd missed this. Suddenly, Ron pulled her into a hug.
"Thanks for not stringing me along like some sort of bleeding idiot," he whispered in her ear.
"Of course, Ron."
"And thanks in advance for not dating my sister…"
Hermione rolled her eyes as she pulled back, "Alright, Ronald, that's enough!" she exclaimed, giving him a light push.
Ron flashed her a grin, "Should I suggest to my mum that you sleep in Bill's room tonight? Wouldn't want you to be too tempted by staying with Ginny in her room…"
"Ronald Weasley!"
Ron laughed as Ginny entered the room, "What's he done now?"
Hermione shook her head with a smile, "He's just being Ron…"
"Charming… Well, anyone fancy a game of Exploding Snap before bed?"
The three of them spent the rest of the evening playing round after round of Exploding Snap before they were ushered up to bed by Mrs. Weasley.
"We'll need to be up early tomorrow morning to catch the train, you can't spend all night playing that ridiculous game!"
Once Ginny was settled into her bed, with Crookshanks at her feet, of course, and Hermione was settled into her cot, Ginny rolled over to face Hermione.
"So, I take it Ron took the news fairly well?"
"Yes… Certainly much better than I'd anticipated."
"That's great, I'm happy for you, Hermione."
"Thanks Ginny."
"How are you feeling about seeing Parkinson tomorrow?"
"Nervous, but excited as well. I'm obviously not going to tell her first thing tomorrow, I think I want to feel out our friendship a bit more first, but yeah, I'm excited to see her," Hermione said with a small smile.
Ginny grinned at her, "I'm excited to see Luna too. I'm getting far too used to seeing her every day. Even though I saw her plenty over the holiday, it wasn't nearly enough," Ginny said as she rolled onto her back, magicking out the lights.
Hermione was quiet for a bit, before she broke the silence.
"Ginny?"
"Yeah?"
"Ron knows you fancy Luna…"
"What?!"