Chapter 12

Maura had gone vasovagal, and she was now slowly coming to. The familiar voice she had heard earlier was coaching her to wake up.

"She's waking up, lets give her some space, okay?" Frankie motioned for everyone to leave, and give them some room.

The blonde opened her eyes, and looked up into concerned chocolate eyes that reminded her so much of Jane's. "Frankie?"

"Hey, Maura." he said sheepishly, then gently helped her sit up a little, he handed her a glass of water.

The doctor looked around the room; she appeared to be in Lt. Cavanaugh's office; on his couch. She blushed, feeling embarrassed. The location meant she had been carried all the way upstairs, unconscious.

"You feeling any better?" Frankie looked at her concerned.

Maura slowly nodded her head, not wanting to make herself dizzy again.

"You're back in Boston," the younger Rizzoli stated. He rubbed his neck, feeling a little uncomfortable.

"I came back yesterday," Maura had finally found her voice again, "I was supposed to meet with Cavanaugh," she looked around the room.

"He stepped out, wanted to give you some privacy. Don't worry, nobody really saw me take you in here." Frankie knew the doctor would have been embarrassed about that.

"Jane," Maura breathed, the events that had made her faint quickly coming back to her, "she…how" the doctor closed her eyes again, not knowing how to finish that sentence.

"Jane has amnesia. She was in an accident. Hit her head pretty hard." Frankie was a little worried with how much he should share with the still very pale woman. "She almost didn't make it."

"When?" Maura asked.

…

"Frankie? When was she in an accident?"

"It doesn't matter, does it?" the younger Rizzoli was biting his bottom lip, keeping himself from saying more.

"Your reaction, and reluctance to share, would indicate that it does matter." Maura stated, reading Frankie's body language easily.

"Knowing will only hurt, Maura."

"Please tell me," the doctor urged, although she was starting to get an inkling.

"She was on her way to the airport, to stop you from leaving," Frankie looked down at his feet, not wanting to see the devastation that was surely evident on Maura's face now.

It felt like a punch in the stomach, that's what it felt like to hear those words. For a short moment, Maura forgot how to breathe.

"She's okay though, I mean besides the not remembering stuff." Frankie sat down next to the devastated blonde on the couch.

"H…how much does she remember?" Maura asked, her voice shaky.

"Nothing important." The younger Rizzoli tried to remember the correct term," they called it…pure gatorade...or something… amnesia."

"Pure retrograde amnesia," Maura corrected, knowing exactly what that meant.

"Yes, that's it. She remembers nothing at all about her own life, or the people that were in it. She didn't even remember her own name." Frankie explained.

"Did…did anyone ever tell her about me?" Maura reluctantly asked.

Frankie shook his head, "you are probably going to hate us for this." The young italian man thought back to when they were first in the hospital, and he started to explain to Maura what had happened, and what was decided.

The paramedics had brought Jane in thirty minutes earlier, and she was directly wheeled into surgery. Korsak was already at the hospital, anxiously waiting to hear from the doctors when Angela and Frankie entered the building.

"What happened, Vince?" Angela looked at Korsak, "what happened to my Janey?"

"She was in a car accident. A truck clipped her at an intersection," Korsak hated to be the bearer of bad news, "she ran a red light at high speed."

"Why would she do that? Where was she going? Why would she be speeding?" Angela asked confused.

The older detective looked at his feet, not knowing how the next piece of information would be accepted, "she was on her way to the airport, trying to get to Maura."

"Maura? What, why?" Angela let herself fall back on one of the plastic chairs in the room, "where is Maura anyway?"

Korsak took a seat next to the older italian woman, "Maura quit her job as chief M.E. yesterday, she was leaving the country today."

"Why would she do that?" Angela knew a little bit about the problems her daughter and the doctor had been having ever since Frost died, but she always assumed they would work through it.

"They…broke up, Angela. Maura left to be with her mother. Cavanaugh told me this morning Maura quit her job. Jane must have found out this morning. She must have been on her way to the airport to try and stop her. I…" Korsak looked down at his hands, not wanting to say anything more.

The older Rizzoli woman was quiet for a while, processing the information she had just been given.

After a few minutes she spoke up, "nobody calls Maura," she said resolute.

"What? Ma, you can't do that. She would want to know what happened," Frankie, who had been quiet throughout the conversation, opened his mouth now. "She has a right to know."

"No, she doesn't," Angela raised her voice, "she gave up that right by leaving Jane behind like that. This is her fault. All of this. After everything, she didn't even say goodbye. To any of us. And now my Janey is in a hospital fighting for her life, because she was trying to stop Maura from leaving. This is all her fault," she repeated the last words again.

"Maura loves Jane," Frankie tried again.

"If she did, she wouldn't have left her. She would have stayed and helped her through this. Jane has been going through hell these last few weeks." Angela brokered no argument. "Promise me, both of you, you will not call Maura. She's not to know what happened."

Korsak and Frankie looked at each other, then reluctantly agreed to the Rizzoli matriarch's request.

It was touch and go for the next few days. Jane had suffered severe trauma to her head, and the doctors were worried about brain damage. During surgery she had slipped into a coma, and they did not know when and if she would wake up from it.

Six full days later there was finally a change in Jane's condition, and she started to wake up.

What was first a hopeful, joyous event for the detective's friends and family, quickly turned into a nightmare.

Jane had indeed woken up from her coma, but she had no recollection of who she was or how she had gotten there. She didn't know her family, or her friends; she didn't even remember her own name.

After the initial awkward introductions, and with a doctor present at all times, they had slowly started to reintroduce Jane to facets of her own life.

It had started with things like, her name, birth day, basic information.

It was on the second day that Jane noticed the fading scars on her hands, and she had started to ask questions about what caused them.

At that point they had to make the decision of how much to tell her, they had decided on the truth. But halfway throughout the explanation, Jane had stopped them. She didn't want to know any more.

Since she now had a fresh slate, she didn't want to hear about any of the negative events that happened in her life. She didn't want her head filled with bad things that she couldn't remember anyway.

And in a way, everyone agreed. Well, mostly everyone. Frankie didn't agree, but because his sister wanted it that way, he went with it. The psychologist that was assigned to help Jane deal with things, didn't agree either. He'd said Jane was putting her head in the sand, that she was avoiding; the brunette requested a different psychologist soon after.

After a few days the inevitable question came, when Jane asked if she had a special someone in her life.

Angela had briefly hesitated, but then told Jane, 'no'; there wasn't anyone, she was single. Then the next day, Angela had told Frankie to go to Jane's apartment and remove any picture or other reminders of Maura, and throw them out.

Frankie had done what his mother asked, grudgingly, but he hadn't thrown the items out. He'd put them in a box and kept them in his closet. He wasn't sure why; the chances of Jane's memory returning where slim to none, because of the damage and the location of the injury. And Maura was gone, she'd probably never come back to Boston, but still he wanted to hold on to the items.

So they only told Jane the things she asked for, and then only the positive things. It was messed up, but surprisingly it made Jane happy, and that made Frankie happy. So he went along with it.

His sister didn't remember who he was, but they still had an instant connection together.

Jane was different, yet she was essentially still the same; cocky, sarcastic, funny, confident, moody.

It was Jane, but without the darkness that had surrounded her ever since Hoyt got to her.

It was like having a happier version of his sister than before the accident.

She would joke more, she was positive. She didn't have any nightmares.

It was almost surreal.

Frankie had a hard time with it sometimes; he had all these memories of growing up with Jane, that she didn't have anymore. But after comparing it with the deep depression she had been in before the accident, this was almost preferred in an odd way. He just worried what would happen if Jane ever would get her memories back, and her response when she finds out how much they really hid from her.

However the chances of that were almost nonexistent.

"And that's about it really," Frankie said, finished with telling Maura everything that had happened to Jane the past few months.

The blonde just stared in front of her, not knowing what to say. There was nothing to say, there was nothing left. Maura had come back to Boston for a person that for all intents and purposes wasn't there anymore. The Jane Rizzoli she knew, was gone. The relationship they'd had, was only in her own memories. She was too late. She had left, and now there was nothing to come back for.

"I should go", Maura finally said, getting up from the couch, "I should have never come back here."

"What are you going to do?" Frankie asked, he didn't know why, but he hoped Maura would stay. Even though his sister didn't remember the doctor, he remembered what the two used to be like, and he wanted that again for them.

"I don't know," Maura softly spoke, "there's nothing here for me anymore."

Frankie got up as well, and stood in front of the doctor, "you still love her don't you?" he asked.

"I do. I never stopped," Maura almost angrily wiped at the tears forming in her eyes, "I came back for her, to be with her if I could. To rebuild what was lost."

"Then stay." Frankie said, getting him a confused look from the doctor, "rebuild what was lost. Start over. You guys were good together, maybe you can get to know each other again. I know it sounds weird, but I always thought you guys belonged together. Won't you try?"

"What's the point," Maura sounded defeated.

"The point is that you love her. She's still Jane." Frankie didn't know why this was so important to him. Maybe it was because if Maura and Jane got back together, at least something would be the way it was supposed to be again. Or maybe it was because Maura always had made Jane happy. "She's the same person, just …lighter."

"I don't know, Frankie. She has no memories of me, or what we used to be together."

"Then build new memories, Maura. Stay. For a while at least." The younger Rizzoli put his hands on Maura's shoulder, and gave them a soft squeeze. "If there's really nothing left, you can always leave again. You owe it to yourself, and to Jane to give it a chance."

"I'll think about it." Maura straightened out her clothing that had gotten a little wrinkled from lying on the couch earlier, "thank you for telling me, Frankie. You're a good brother to Jane."

"I'm your brother too, Maura." Frankie gave her a shy smile. He had always considered the doctor family, even before she and his sister had gotten romantically involved.

They were interrupted by a knock on the door and Lt. Cavanaugh sticking his head back in to check on them, "any chance I'll be getting my office back this century?" he tried to joke lightly.

Frankie politely made his exit, leaving the doctor to talk to his boss.