Alice couldn't sleep. Her thoughts were beating her to death. What had once been her salvation had suddenly become her undoing.
She didn't want to think about it. She didn't want to but she thought about it anyway.
Thoughts were such a strange thing, only the bad ones came to mind.
Alice felt tired, but at the same time full of emotion. Full of emotion and yet so empty.
Her anxiety had been turning to anger lately. She was tired of her life.
She was tired of having to jump the way others wanted her to.
She was tired of following all those noble rules that required her to dress smartly, speak obediently and only when asked.
She was tired of hearing how her own mother wanted to control her life. To reshape her to fit the image of a young lady from a good family.
It was all tiring, uninteresting... all the greyness made her hate it.
Hate was a very strong feeling, but in most cases volatile.
But in her case, it still persisted. She couldn't shake the feeling.
But the worst part was that she wasn't home now. She wasn't even at Ascot eatside, where Hamish was going to force her to marry him.
No, she was in Underland and surprisingly it was worse. She never thought it could get worse, but it did. To her minor worries and nervousness.
She was in a place where everyone looked like she had a choice. As if she could choose her fate, what she was going to do, but that wasn't true.
Alice could see in their eyes that they would not accept any answer other than to kill Jabberwocky.
But what could she do? This was all a dream, she had nowhere to go, or at least she had until yesterday.
Alice wanted so badly to disappear... disappear?
Suddenly something clicked in her head. It was an idea. She'd never had such a crazy idea before.
Without thinking, she left her room, in Queen Mirana's castle, where she was supposed to "decide" if she would become Champion.
She hated it.
Alice didn't really want to admit it, but she was starting to - hate Underland.
Alice knew she hated the Red Queen, Stayne and the Red Army, for their cruelty and hostility.
Mostly Stayne, who tried to flirt with her and reminded her...
But that didn't matter anymore until she realized she was beginning to hate Tarrant, her friends, even Cheshire cat.
But the worst part was that she was starting to hate the White Queen too, one of the few people who didn't act like she had to kill a monster when she could die.
One of the few nice people...
Alice didn't want to admit it, but it was true, she hated them all. Everyone she once loved and admired, she just couldn't stand right now.
She wanted them...
Alice stopped that thought before she could finish it. What was she thinking? Was she crazy? She didn't mean to hurt them, she didn't mean to kill them.
Alice sat down on the stairs, sighing heavily. Something was wrong with her. Something was always wrong with her, but this time it was even worse.
She could think of nothing but blood and destruction. Alice was sure she was crazy.
Tomorrow she was supposed to kill the monster and all she could think about was killing her...
Were they even friends?
After all, to her, they were just people she met when she was six. And not even for a day. That's why it had such a big impact on her... It didn't make them her friends or acquaintances.
There was nothing between them.
No connections, no relationships, just nothing.
No one here cared about her or wanted to spend time with her. There was no...
Alice is now quiet. She wasn't thinking. All she could do at the moment was sit on the marble steps, just outside the door to the castle, with the trees spread out before her?
Alice realized she was looking at the Marmoral Gardens. They were beautiful, so many beautiful kinds of trees, shrubs and flowers.
The darkness of the night and the moonlight gave them a whole new perspective.
It was almost a dark splendour of the night. Alice liked the contrast. It took her away from her dark thoughts and problems for a while.
It was a brief moment of silence and peace.
Until it was irrevocably interrupted.
"Alice, what are you doing here?" The White Queen's voice did not startle Alice. The blonde girl felt too numb to feel anything.
"...Nothing, Your Majesty." Alice didn't even look at the White Queen. She couldn't help but make her voice sound cold and formal.
"Alice, when we're alone you don't have to be so... formal." Mirana said her voice soft and melodious as ever.
Alice turned to Mirana now. "I'm afraid I can't do that, Your Majesty." Alice looked into Mirana's eyes the whole time until Mirana averted her gaze.
"...Very Well." Mirana didn't speak another word. The kind yet sometimes unapproachable queen looked sad.
Or Alice was hallucinating.
They spent a few moments in silence. After a few minutes, Mirana sat down next to Alice. She was close to the younger woman, not too close, to the calmness of the younger blonde.
"...There's a reason you're so serious. When we met you were such a sweet child..." Alice looked surprised. Earlier that evening, memories of her time in Underland so many years ago came back to her but she didn't remember Mirana.
"Have we ever met before all this?" Alice herself didn't know why, but she sounded curious for all her coldness.
Mirana saw that beautiful light in Alice's eyes shine again. The light that was in young Alice's eyes when she first saw her.
"Yes, my dear girl, we have met before... it was I who helped you get home all those years ago." Mirana said, her brown eyes honest and soft.
Alice remained silent. Her eyes widened.
"I don't remember." Alice said, after a few minutes of silence. Mira's eyes never lost that softness. It almost seemed like Mirana cared for her.
Mirana suddenly took Alice's hand in her own. "But I did. I remember it like it was yesterday." Mirana said, her thumb beginning to caress Alice's knuckles.
"You were such a cute and sweet baby. You smiled at everyone and gave them hugs when you could." Mirana sounded dreamy, like it was one of her favorite memories.
"It's a shame you've grown up. You're a young woman growing up now." The light in Mirana's eyes dimmed a little. "You've grown out of that charming childlike innocence. You haven't completely grown out of that innocence...although-" Mirana stopped speaking when she realized Alice had tears in her eyes. The younger girl was shaking, her breathing rapid.
"I said something wrong-" The White Queen was interrupted when Alice hugged her tightly. Alice held Mirana tightly, her eyes looking into Mirana's hazel ones with a strange strength.
"I don't know why, but I feel really bad about you lying to me. How could...how could you think that I could ever in my life...be good enough to..." Alice trailed off, her eyes still holding that strange fire. It wasn't anger, it was pain that reflected in the blue irises.
"I've never, no one could ever love me. Not when I was little and not now. I'm completely useless-" This time it was Mirana who hugged Alice. Her gentle yet strong hands ran through Alice's curly hair.
" Don't say that. It's not true. You're beautiful, you're still so cute..."
Mirana didn't know that she had accidentally made Alice turn away from her. The distance between them was not lost on Mirana, who immediately corrected it and pulled the young blonde to her again.
"Why are you lying? I can't be...not then-" Alice's breath caught in her throat. Memories of a day she wanted to forget forever flashed before her eyes. She'd never forget it. She never could. She could never even admit it to herself. Never. Ni-
Mirana hugged Alice again, this time much tighter. Alice's head rested on Mirana's chest. Mirana looked at the younger girl, her gaze somehow sad. The older woman had no idea about Alice's past, but from the state Alice was in right now, whatever she had been through, it had to be horrible.
Alice calmed down after a few long minutes. She had broken her promise to never cry about this again...and more than a little disappointed herself. She couldn't help but want to get her facade back.
"I'm so...sorry, this was unsolicited of me. I am so sorry for bothering you." Alice spoke distantly again, as if her minor meltdown hadn't even happened. Or at least she tried to act like it had.
"No, no...Alice!" Mirana looked urgent, giving Alice a look that screamed concern, and no small amount of sadness.
Not that Alice noticed. She tried to calm her labored breathing and rapid heartbeat. It seemed that Alice's feelings had finally reached their limit of manageability. Except Alice was completely defenseless and helpless to it.
"What was Underland - or Wonderland, as this place is called - like back in the day?" Alice suddenly asked, she didn't look fine or worse, but her eyes still carried that childlike curiosity.
Alice herself didn't know why, but the walls she had built around herself in her lifetime...were crumbling in the presence of the White Queen.
...like they were never even there...
"When I ruled..." Mirana spoke carefully, her eyes darkening. The younger blonde couldn't tell if she was sad or angry, but she listened intently nonetheless.
"Underland was a beautiful place. A land full of green and life...whose inhabitants were truly happy." Mirana looked nostalgic, a small smile playing on her face. She looked beautiful, in her own distinctive way.
"I used to throw festivals that were for everyone, so much food and merriment...games and masquerades..." Mirana sighed, her ever-present smile gone. All that was left was a sad grimace that hid anger and pain underneath.
Alice didn't speak a word the whole time...her breathing more steady and her mind more calm. Yet her soul was a little confused and restless.
"...it's hard to know that it's all long gone..." Alice wasn't asking, just pointing out the obvious. She meant no harm to Mirana.
"Yes, it is. It's getting harder every day..." Mirana didn't try to hide her emotions this time. Her mask, that of the perfect queen, was also put away for a while. Underneath, there was only Mirana.
"Is this why everyone wants me to fight and kill Jabberwocky?" Alice didn't sound angry this time when she asked the question, she even sounded a little more human this time as if believing this was a dream a day ago was just a faded memory. It almost sounded...
"Unfortunately, yesof her melodious voice.
"I'm very sorry than you can even imagine, my dear girl. Do you think I'm comfortable sending a young woman to war? To fight for Underland...and potentially in the process-" Mirana stopped herself from speaking this time. Alice was surprised to see how open the queen had become.
Alice took Miranda's hand in hers. The younger woman looked almost sympathetic, a stark contrast to her normally stubborn and dismissive demeanor.
"I'm sorry." For once, Alice spoke with neither disgust nor venom in her voice. For once she wasn't thinking of killing Jabberwocky just from her point of view.
"Your Majesty, what are you doing here?"
Alice asked out of the blue. After all, there was no way the Queen could have found her outside by complete accident. Alice was unaware that she was still holding Mirana's hand. Nor the slight flush in Mirana's cheeks.
"To tell you the truth, I couldn't sleep. So I thought I'd go see how my beloved trees were doing." Mirana smiled at Alice, despite all the stress that had driven her out of bed. It was one of the more genuine smiles Alice had seen so far.
"May I ask what is so special about these trees?" Alice tried to sound formal, but even so, curiosity was in her voice. She thought she heard the courtiers talking about the Queen and her habit of caring for the trees and talking to them.
Mirana looked at Alice a little surprised, but then one of the most enthusiastic smiles appeared on her face. "They talk, they feel and they sense. They are some of the most beautiful creatures in my kingdom. They understand me like no one else..." Mirana suddenly stood up and took Alice, through their linked hands, with her.
Alice was surprised because she had forgotten about their entwined hands, but she didn't complain. If she was honest with herself for just a moment, she would admit that she liked it.
"Where-" Mirana silenced Alice by putting a finger to her lips. Mirana had an aura of mystery and even excitement about her. This was not the normal look of a reserved and sometimes stern queen that Alice knew.
"You'll soon see. When that happens, you'll understand why I love trees so much." Mirana slowed her gait a little as she noticed the younger blonde couldn't keep up with her fast pace.
Alice had no idea what to say. Her communication skills weren't as good as she would sometimes like to believe. Which was perhaps why her thoughts were more focused on Mirana's soft hands and not on the lack of conversation.
The silence that settled between them for a moment was not uncomfortable. On the contrary, it was peaceful for once, since neither of them was distant. They both opened up to each other more than they realized.
As they walked hand in hand Alice watched the moon. Granted, it was illogical for there to be a moon in a land that should be underground, but whatever. Alice couldn't help but observe how beautiful the moon's rays were and how they illuminated the landscape.
Alice didn't notice at first, but Mirana watched her. The look in Mirana's eyes said more than words ever could, and so the White Queen turned away from Alice. It would have been much better if the platinum blonde herself hadn't started with that look, because it left her with a feeling of longing. A longing for more.
Mirana held the younger woman's hand a little tighter. Her grip wasn't rough, but it wasn't weak either. Not that Alice particularly noticed it when they arrived at the single cherry tree after several long moments. It wasn't exactly normal, considering there were only birch and willow trees growing all around.
"Not many people know this, but my favorite kind of tree is the cherry...and I generally like trees that have more color in them."
Mirana looked pleased with herself, as if that was one of the things she was really proud of. Alice's eyes didn't miss the excitement written all over Mirana's face.
"...so all those birches and willows...?"
Alice didn't say directly what she was asking, but Mirana understood immediately. If it weren't for how natural it sounded, it would have been strange. No weirder than normal, but still weird.
"My title of White Queen does not come only from the fact that, unlike my sister, I rule justly, do not murder and do not start wars. Not just because I want peace, but not because I live in Marmoreal, a white marble castle whose walls are sometimes too cold." Mirana's voice was firm, but the look in her eyes was soft. It almost sounded like she was speaking honestly, not just recounting old history to Alice.
"This title has been assigned to me, as the rightful ruler of Underland. So it was with all the White Sovereigns before me. This title is meant to signify complete purity and innocence. Therefore, everything around me must be white. That's why the trees around Marmoreal Gardens were specially chosen for their color..." Mirana spoke neutrally, it wasn't clear from her tone of voice if she minded or not.
"Aren't you bored that it's all the same? Don't you get bored with the mundanity and the greyness, I mean the whiteness?" Alice might have asked more, but her manners stopped her from asking. Maybe not so much manners, but the memories of punishment, the pain that came with asking too much.
Mirana looked a little surprised, but Alice didn't read any more emotion from her. "I can't be bored when all of Underland is so-" Mirana stopped herself as she remembered what her sister had done to the normally beautiful landscape.
"It's not ideal, but you can get used to it, and ...there is a certain beauty in it. ' Alice couldn't help but think it sounded like the most neutral thing of all. She wondered if Mirana was sincere or just making it up. After all, no monarch would insult his own country and palaces.
"Oh..." Alice wasn't so much surprised or confused this time. The younger blonde felt confused almost all the time, so she didn't even notice that emotion anymore.
"So...why are we here?" Alice subtly prompted from Mirana.
Mirana looked surprised before a smile appeared on her face. Her face lit up completely. It was a beautiful sight that Alice wanted to keep in her memory forever.
"Alice,have you ever talked to trees?"
The question, it came out of Mirana's mouth quite naturally, there was no awkward hesitation. Which Alice didn't find so strange, considering all she'd already experienced in this strange land.
"No. Do trees usually talk here?" Alice was more than a little curious. She tried not to let it show too much, even to her, but she was clearly failing.
"Of course they talk, but you have to be risky and pure of heart. The trees don't hear your words, but they understand your feelings. They feel their meaning and through it they can communicate back." The White Queen spoke with utter ease and precision. There was no dark meaning behind her words, as there was for most of the people of Underland. "Wait and you will soon see for yourself what the experience is really like."
Alice hesitated for a moment. She wasn't sure if it would be as beautiful as Mirana had described it. Not that she'd said it out loud, but it might have shown on her anyway. Maybe more than a little, given Mirana's encouraging smile.
"Do people really do that around here?" Alice asked firmly, but uncertainly at the same time. She couldn't help but find the idea of nature perceiving everything as a human being insane. Just like everything else.
"Of course...though not that often. Few have a pure enough mind and soul to deal with this, or the trees to answer it." Mirana said her face sweet and kind, yet somehow Alice sensed the bitterness behind the words, she was hiding.
" So what exactly do I have to do to communicate with them?" Alice asked after a long moment of silence. She wasn't sure why they were both suddenly silent, but that didn't stop her from breaking the silence.
Mirana just shook her head slightly this time and took Alice's hand.
In the space of a few seconds, so much happened to Alice that she stiffened noticeably.
In the first few seconds, her cheeks turned bright pink as Miranda's soft and surprisingly gentle hand suddenly held hers.
Alice couldn't react quickly enough to this sudden movement, so her only reaction when Mirana practically hugged her from behind and pressed her hand against the tree trunk was a surprised little hiss.
The older and surprisingly taller woman held Alice firmly but gently at the same time. One of her hands held Alice's arm, their fingers intertwined and the other was holding Alice's waist, so they both stayed close.
Than Alice felt something strange going on with her hand that was holding a tree's bark. Heat was pouring from that spot and spreading through Alice's arm to her entire body. In the background Alice could hear Mirana giggling. The younger blonde could feel the cheerful and playfull energy that the older woman was practically sending out in waves.
Alice could suddenly perceive the world around her very differently. Alice felt the energy begin to circulate within her and that's when she smelled it, the scent of cherries. A wonderful scent that calmed her mind. Her body no longer tensed or resisted Miranas strong hands holding her gently.
It was as if her mind was under some sort of calming spell and someone was whispering in her ear. She couldn't hear what it was, but it brought her a terrible peace and support. She couldn't help but be reminded of the feeling of drunkenness...and freedom. It was beautiful.
Alice was unaware of the worried look Mirana was giving her or the tree's concern. It was almost as if the tree knew of Alice's past and was trying to comfort her, which meant that Alice's soul was pure and the trees had accepted her as one of their own, despite the young girl's apparent dark past.
That hasn't happened in Underland in a long, long time. The last person to forge such a strong bond was Mirana herself, and a few chosen and tormented souls before that. It would be a blessing for most people if the trees could speak to them, even for a moment. To forge a bond and be accepted into their clan was so rare and forbidden that the anger and attack of the trees would have been far more likely than their compassion and pact.
Meanwhile, Alice was having an indescribable experience, her body feeling an overwhelming pleasure. It was all wonderful...the tree's words, though Ali could not perceive them, but not saying them did not prevent her from feeling their meaning.
Meanwhile, Mirana was experiencing a minor contradiction in herself. Only now did she realize how inappropriately she had been holding Alice. The younger blonde was petite compared to her, so holding her weakened body was not difficult and that was the problem.
Her mind...was full of completely inappropriate thoughts. Completely... inappropriate. She was sure normal beings wouldn't think like that. Not around the young, beautiful girl who was to become her knight in shining armor...
Mirana blushed a dark shade of blush, clearly visible on her pale cheeks. The thoughts in her head made no sense. She had never experienced such a feeling of longing...never...not around such a cute-.
Mirana immediately shook her head and inadvertently pressed herself even closer to Alice. When Mirana thought about it this was the first time she had held any woman in this way with these thoughts. Mirana couldn't help but recap her entire behavior around Alice and came to the conclusion...
Alice suddenly moved quickly, her whole body tensing. Whatever was happening between her and the tree didn't look good. The White Queen knew that after the calming phase usually came the flashbacks of the past from the most pleasant to the darkest.
Which in itself led to a similar reaction that could have been similar to Alice's...but never lasted this long. That, Mirana thought, was why she was holding Alice this way. Not just for her selfish desires, but for her safety.
Mirana didn't want to make the same mistake twice. She remembered all too well her violent reaction, which was out of character and ended up giving her a concussion. In a matter of seconds.
Alice was now resisting her hands with all her strength. And to Mirana's surprise, Alice managed to almost escape her. Everything that happened later was quick. In one second Mirana was holding Alice tightly. In the second the younger woman overpowered her and pinned her to the ground.
Alice was on top of Mirana, the only thing stopping her from any violent behavior was the cherry tree itself and its branches grabbing her wrists. It wasn't a painful grip, but it wasn't pleasant either. The magic saw wasn't working on Alice any more. Which had never happened before. And certainly not when the person in question was only human.
After a few minutes, Alice calmed down. Her conversation with Cherry turned out surprisingly well. No more painful flashbacks or memories came back to her. They were gone, and her conversation, made up of feelings and moods, was surprisingly successful. It was but a few minutes before the tree loosened its branches around Alice's wrists. Still, Alice did not return to reality. Her mind still communicated magically with the tree...and her acceptance into their community was complete.
Not that Alice realized it, but Mirana could sense the change in her. The protection that the trees and nature itself provided. It was one of those magical pacts that carried many benefits. That was why it was necessary to go through an individual's entire life, all their experiences, opinions and feelings.
A bond had to be formed.
And that could never be broken. The pact, the bond, the connection. It had a lot of names for a lot of reasons. The biggest one was because of the variation and execution of the benefits of this bond. There was no denying that if anyone could obtain it...the world would become a very dangerous place filled with omnipotent existences...so there were criteria that had to be met.
"Alice...Alice, my dear girl, do you hear me?" Mirana asked caringly. It had never occurred to her before that a mere conversation would lead to the formation of a magical bond. She wondered if Alice was okay or not after all. If she wasn't Mirana would never forgive herself.
Within seconds, Alice came back to reality. It was in the blink of an eye and Alice was still on top of Mirana. When Alice came to in this position, she nearly fainted from shock and shame.
"H-how did I get here?!" Alice's voice was unusually high pitched and broke in irregular frequencies. Alice froze, so her only reaction, other than the flush of her cheeks, was an uncertain whistle. It hadn't occurred to Alice that this situation could have been resolved if she had simply gotten off Mirana and not made such a fuss about it. Unfortunately, she hadn't thought of that, and neither had Mirana.
"Well...you had a bit of a violent reaction to the tree and their acceptance into the clan." Mirana said nervously. She wasn't sure how to react to the woman who was currently above her. Mirana had a great view of Alice's face and her cleavage if she looked down a little...
"What do you mean I've been accepted into the clan?" Alice was confused, nervous and a little too excited about everything that had happened between them. It was a strange surprise that she couldn't decide if she liked or not. Rather not, as the young woman reflected on all that had happened.
"Well..." Mirana didn't know what to say. Her gaze was as uncertain as Alice's. The only difference was that Mirana was actively aware of what had happened and why. It wasn't that Mirana was doing anything wrong, but she still felt that way. Almost to the point of guilt. Logically, she knew she had no reason to be, yet it did nothing to comfort her.
"..." Alice didn't know exactly what to say either. Her whole body was tense with nervousness. The younger blonde could feel sweat and a strange warmth flooding her body. They were sensations that Alice couldn't process, so she didn't move an inch.
Mirana wasn't moving either, but for a completely different reason than Alice. The older woman was well aware of what was happening. What she felt, saw and perceived. In one swift movement, Mirana flipped their positions. Now it was the White Queen who was on top of Alice. The branches of the cherry tree had long since released Alice from their steely grip. Mirana took good advantage of that.
Alice didn't say a word. She was too emberrased to even think about it. Alice didn't want to admit how much she liked it. She didn't want to think about their bodies touching. She didn't want to think about that beautiful face, so close to hers. She didn't want to think about the soft hands that were next to her head. She didn't want to think about the inappropriate thoughts she was having. She didn't want to, but she couldn't help it. It was like her body was out of control.
"Alice..." Mirana's hand suddenly began to caress Alice's cheek. The older woman wanted to bring the younger girl back to reality. Or at least look at her and not just avert her gaze and ignore her and their situation.
"Mirana..." It had been so long since Mirana had heard the younger girl, or anyone close to her, call her by her first name. Not your majesty, not my queen. Just Mirana, she was only human underneath it all, after all. How beautiful it sounded from those small, plump lips...
"Could you, could you get off me?" Alice asked. Her voice was low, almost more of a whisper spoken into the wind than a question.
It took Mirana a moment to react. It was almost as if the white queen hadn't even registered Alice's voice. She just kept looking at the younger blonde her eyes widened and her cheeks light pink.
"She could... would you get off...me, please?" Alice asked again her voice even quieter than before. She couldn't help but feel her cheeks were red too. She wasn't sure how to deal with her feelings, she just couldn't admit how she felt about the White Queen. It was a relentless internal battle that she couldn't win. Everything that mattered to her, in her own mind, had become irrelevant.
"..." Mirana was strangely silent. She didn't even seem to be breathing. Her body and eyes spoke a thousand words, but not a sound came out of her mouth. All the platinum blonde could think about were the words Alice had spoken. No, she wasn't just thinking about it. Her entire soul cringed at those six little words, nothing left in her being. The feeling of dread and emberrasment got to the White Queen herself.
Alice couldn't stand what had happened, what was happening and what was going to happen.
"..." Alice wasn't talking anymore either. She didn't force herself to, their positions didn't change. The only thing that changed was Mirana's expression.
Mirana had tears in her eyes, her beautiful brown orbs shining with unshed tears and sadness. It was a sight that made Alice's insides twist. As if the very thought that she, Alice, had made the White Queen herself almost cry...was unbelievable. And it almost made her cry, too. Alice couldn't believe all that was happening, all that had happened, and if she knew what was going to happen, it would have completely consumed her.
The two women almost cried...their tears were unshed, but they both knew what the other was feeling but it wasn't that simple. Neither knew exactly what the other was feeling, they couldn't even know or suspect it, and yet their reactions and thoughts were based on their mind's imagination of the other.
Alice's breath caught in her throat as Mirana kissed her cheek. It was an incredible mind recalled on its own the dreams she had suppressed for so long. The soft touch, the plump lips, the warm feminine figure...these were the kind of dreams she'd had throughout her adolescence and they seemed to leave her longing for more.
"I am so sorry, my dear girl..." Mirana spoke for the first time since this strange situation arose. Her voice was quiet. The melody that had always been present had faded, all that was left was a shaken and broken little voice. Mirana herself could not comprehend the intense emotions that were overwhelming her.
" ..." Now it was Alice's turn and her silence. It seemed that all her willpower was stunned into silence.
"I..i am so sorry...i just..." Alice didn't know how to go on. There were so many things she wanted to ask. Questions she needed to know the answers to and yet not another syllable came through her lips. Maybe it was because of her, her experiences, her pain...
Mirana kissed Alice one last time on the cheek before slowly, very slowly, standing up.
Mirana still had tears in her eyes and her breath was shaky. Despite everything that had happened Mirana reached out to Alice, intending to help her stand.
Alice looked at the strangely devastated Mirana for just a second before taking Mirana's outstretched hand and slowly getting to her feet as well.
This time there was an awkward silence between them. It was such a strange experience for both of them. Yet when Mirana's grip around Alice's hand loosened, Alice still held on. Still holding Mirana's hand, soft as silk, she couldn't help herself. She didn't know why, though. Actually, she did know. All through her adolescence she had known. She just hadn't admitted it to herself, balking at her mind and her feelings all these years. She tried, she tried so hard. Yet it all seemed to come back again. Alice didn't know what she was doing. She was the one who wanted to back out. Who wanted Mirana to stop, despite everything Alice couldn't let go of Mirana's hand. It was as if her body wasn't listening to her.
Mirana could only watch as Alice struggled with herself. As the younger blonde tried to...she didn't know what she was trying to do, but it looked serious. Mirana's tears had stopped. The emotional moment was behind her. Gone...now she felt confused, so very confused. After all, she had known this girl for less than a day. A day. Not counting the days she'd met Alice as a child.
Mirana dragged Alice to the nearest bench, she couldn't help still wanting to be near the younger woman, even if the young woman in question didn't want to at this very moment.
They haven't spoken a word to each other. It was silence, neither comfortable nor awkward silence. It was just silence. They were both lost in their own minds.
The minutes ticked by. Slowly the minutes became hours and the hours became the whole night. Thoughts may be endless, but they too end. They end the moment there is no one left to think. They end in death, but they also end in sleep. And that was the case with Mirana and Alice. Their sleep was uninterrupted but it was not filled with any pleasant imaginings. Nor did their torment end in the realm of dreams. It continued... only in a different form. For Mirana, it was the pain of rejection and for Alice, the pain of denial.
Neither could escape. Yet in reality, they snuggled together. Alice was practically lying on top of Mirana while the white queen embraced her with her whole body. It was the comfort of two warm bodies pressing together. A sensation that could not be described in mere words.
Unfortunately, this comfort could not last forever. It had to end, and it ended the moment the first rays of sunlight appeared in the dark night sky. Morning had finally begun. The dreaded day had arrived. The day when Jaberwocky would be defeated. The Red Queen overthrown and peace finally achieved.
...
Mirana woke up alone on the bench. There was no sign of Alice. The White Queen knew rationally that this was how it would end. She knew it, and yet it hurt. Alice was supposed to be her champion. The oracle never got mixed up. It was supposed to be their destiny but apparently it wasn't. Underland himself was going to have his biggest day today. The day she would have her throne, her crown, her full power - her peace.
It won't happen now. Not after everything that happened yesterday. Even before all that, Alice didn't want to be her champion...
But Mirana couldn't let that stop her. She was a queen. Still. She couldn't give up. Everything was on the line here. She couldn't let her people down.
The fact that her mind and emotions were confused and wild, she couldn't stop her. She had no champion, no hope, no chance, all was lost, her sister would destroy her and everything she cared about-
Mirana took a deep breath and let it out. In and out. A deep inhale and exhale. Calm. All she needed was a calm mind and discretion. Her fears were justified but that meant nothing.
She was a queen worthy of her title. She's gonna win. Even if it means showing her true colors...
...
Alice woke up first. She stiffened at the sight of Mirana's chest.
Her eyes were in the right line, watching...again. There were those thoughts again. Why? Why couldn't she just let it go? Her mind was excited and ashamed. Her desires were becoming reality before her eyes.
Yet she was still so blind.
She tried to change a long time ago. But this couldn't be changed. It was part of her...
Alice quickly got up from the bench. She couldn't stay here. Not with such a beautiful woman beside her. She had to figure it out. Not just ignore it before it destroyed her.
Now that Alice thought of all the destruction today was the day. The day she wanted no part of. But she didn't know what she wanted anymore. Even the thing she thought was final wasn't. She thought this world wasn't real, and it was. She thought she didn't want to fight Jabberwocky and now she didn't know. She thought-
But all that didn't matter. Nothing mattered. How could anything matter if she had no idea what she wanted. Who she was going to be. She was missing her very essence. The things that made her her. Making herself was what she'd been interested in her whole life, and yet she hadn't given that much thought in recent years either. Not that she didn't want to. But as a child, she made one single mistake. She didn't hide it. She didn't fake it. She showed the world what she was.
And he punished her severely for it. It was an old psychological game...and she had long since run out of energy to play it.
...
Mirana stood with her army in front of her castle. Her whole body felt so numb, yet so very much alive. The contrast between her body and soul was enormous. Emotions played their part too fiercely and her thoughts had better stop playing altogether.
The memories of what had happened between her and Alice were always at the forefront of her mind. They played with her like a little kitten played with a ball of wool. She couldn't help herself, no one could help her, and the person who could ran away from her...
The endless reminders of her remaining sanity gave little comfort. As queen, however, she had to endure it.
The door to her lock suddenly opened.
Mirana beamed with happiness. In the end, they could all work out and she could apologize to Alice, her champion would forgive her and together they would defeat her sister.
That was too foolish, her mind was playing tricks on her. It wasn't her champion that came through the door, but a late hatter. Disappointment must have been written all over her face because she could feel the atmosphere thicken even more. The tension was palpable and her soldiers were getting nervous as well.
After a few minutes of nothing happening, she gave the order to march. Despite her slim chances, she's going to try, even if it has to be her who decapitates Jabberwocky.
She didn't want to break her promises. She tried to live half her life in total purity. It was all she knew. Her kindness, her gentleness, her calmness she would have liked to think of these qualities as hers. But they weren't. Not quite. There were ulterior motives behind her every thought, her action, her slightest movement. Her entire being did not go this curse. It was something she had to endure every day something she chose to not unleash on the world because of...
Mirana didn't care as much about her crown as she did about her people. So many dead over a piece of precious metal...it was almost silly. For once, she refused to end the evil that her sister had become. She couldn't make that mistake a second time. She couldn't let her sister continue, she didn't want their blood on her hands-again.
The atmosphere only grew thicker as the soldiers watched their queen laboriously breathe, looking even more like a ghost from ancient myths than a real character. The silence was broken only by the mighty rumble of the white army. No one spoke again, there was nothing to speak. What end awaited them on the chess battlefield was clear to all.
And despite adversity, they continued on. The outline of the battlefield could be seen in the distance until it was closer and closer. The silence that was already tense enough only grew worse. The footsteps, however, remained firm and steady. No one slowed or sped up.
Everything that could have been gained today has finally been irretrievably destroyed. Mirana knew it, all of her knew it. But despite everything, she didn't stop. The expression on her face was not relaxed and calm as usual. All that was left of her charming smile was a slight frown.
Slowly, very slowly, Mirana dismounted from her horse. She could see her sister watching her calculatingly until the red-faced queen almost laughed when she saw Alice.
For the Red Queen, this was just a formality. No one could beat her Jabberwocky. No one. None of Mirana's soldiers, not even Mirana herself, and if she hadn't bothered to come, neither had Alice...
McTwisp bounced nervously to halfcourt. It was practically a miracle that he didn't faint with nervousness, when normally half the stress was enough to cause him to fall.
Even he knew that this day just wasn't going to end well. Even he knew that without Champion, they didn't stand a chance. Even he knew their doom was only minutes away. They all knew it. It was their new reality. No victory, just bitter defeat and death.
"On this day, Queens Red and White are to clash for the last time over Underland-" McTwisp was quickly interrupted. Surprisingly, Stayne, not either of the queens, jumped into his speech.
"It will speed it up. The outcome of this battle is already clear anyway." Stayne said sternly, but there was a gleam of mirth in his healthy eye. It was generally known that the winning side always had better morale than the other. And normally that might be true, but not in Underland. Not in a world where nothing made sense and where madness was found in every individual and corner of the earth.
"Pride goes before a fall, Stayne." Mirana said calmly. Her eyes never left Iracebeth. If looks could kill, they'd both be long dead. All those years of their feud had finally culminated in bloodshed in the form of war.
Stayne would probably have said something not so calm back to Mirana if McTwisp hadn't surprisingly had enough of it, what with his icy temper and his worried and missing voice,
Stayne interrupted.
"Please stop it! What is to be done will be done." McTwisp said firmly, interrupting their mutual hostility for just a brief moment. It was really only a moment, because the mutual hatred returned in the next instant.
"Let not the chosen Champions of the two Queens come forward." White Rabbit cut his opening speech much shorter, he had no illusions about how this duel would turn out. Even though he faithfully stayed by his Queen's side.
On the Red Queen's side, the large Red Army has dispersed to make room for the mythical and deadly Jabberwocky. It was a stunning and terrifying sight, but not as terrifying as the dark resentment in Iracebeth's eyes.
Nothing happened on the other side. No movement, just silence and worried looks. Who will step up and face the monster? Who would be crazy enough to replace Alice? Who would be so crazy?
The tension just got higher and higher. There was only one question on everyone's mind.
Who will win and how? Who will be the winner and who will be the loser? Is the White Queen capable of winning without a champion?
Was Orculum wrong, and if so, what did it mean to them?
...