-Chapter 45-
Bubblers & Burners
Marine Pop - Medical Bay
On the Marine Pop, Sebas went over Peach's vitals.
"Hmm... pulse looks good. Breathing normal. Just need to refill her IV."
As he made for the submarine's storage fridge, he heard the door open.
"Ahh, Master Mario," the butler greeted as the red-clad plumber walked in, the others following behind him.
"Hey Sebas," Mario replied, his gaze turning toward the butler's patient. "How is she? Any chance she'll wake up soon?"
Sebas' expression fell. "I wish I could tell you, Master Mario," he sighed as he pulled out a fresh IV bag. "She could wake up after a few more minutes or a few more days… perhaps longer."
"I just... I'm worried."
"I know. But rest assured, we're doing everything we can to help her."
"Ohhhhh!"
The pair flinched, startled at the sudden shouting of the - until now, silent - third person in the room. E. Gadd was performing what looked like a séance, sitting in the midst of a crude magic circle with a Starman in the center, drawn in crayon, and an Ouija board behind him.
"Salami, baloney, and pumpernickel loaf!" he chanted. "Hear me, o' Spirits of the Underwhere! Bring us Peach's soul, be she there! Bring her back with speed and care! Lest I shove my vacuum up your derri...!"
"Professor!" Sebas snapped,
"Hu-wha?" E. Gadd turned to him.
"Would you please do that somewhere else? The princess is trying to rest!"
"But the ceremony has to be held in the presence of the victim's body!" E. Gadd objected. "Otherwise, it could get lost!"
"You idiot!" MP bonked him on top of his head. "She's in a coma, not dead!"
"That doesn't mean anything! Her soul could still be missing! I've seen it before! People in comas because their souls were knocked out of their bodies. And she did require a 1-Up Mushroom. Now, if you'll excuse me..."
Gadd cleared his throat as he got back to work.
"Jaydes... Grambi... Stars and more... Bring the princess here once..."
He was cut off by a thrown cup that narrowly missed his head.
"Stop it!" Daisy shouted. "She's not dead! Her soul's just fine! So cut it out, you senile old coot!"
"Oh fine!" E. Gadd scoffed. "But when she starts to rot because her soul line has decayed, don't come crying to me!"
He stormed off in a huff. Daisy sighed.
"I'd kill him if he didn't look like he had one foot in the grave already…" she grumbled.
"I've got a shovel and an alibi," MP offered.
"O-Okay, let's calm down..." Luigi insisted before perking. "Oh, Daisy! What can you tell us about the... what was it... the Mooda Kingdom?"
"Mew-da," Daisy corrected. "An underwater kingdom, run by King Zamasu and his brother, General Muscato. It's a Warp Zone hotspot; a lot of things have mysteriously disappeared there... and a lot of things not of this world have come here as well. Mostly a bunch of aircraft and ships."
That got Luigi's attention. "Disappeared?"
"Oh, no," Mario sighed. "You set him off." At Daisy's look, he cleared his throat. "He watched this conspiracy theory show called Our Miraculous World back in Brooklyn. I still remember when he didn't brush his teeth for days after that kook host said toothpaste renders your teeth detectable by spy satellites."
"Don't forget that crock about those plastic bits at the end of shoelaces being made for a sinister purpose," MP chimed in.
"They're called aglets." Luigi corrected.
MP rolled her eyes. "What are you, a Disney Channel cartoon? Nobody cares!"
" I care! And they're definitely evil!"
"Which is why he wears slip-ons." MP gestured to Luigi's boots, which were virtually identical to Mario's except with velcro straps in place of laces. Luigi blushed and chuckled awkwardly.
"RRRRiiiiiiiiiiiiiight..." Daisy rolled her eyes. "Anyway, as for Zamasu himself, the guy's a total blowhard. Pompous, arrogant… and a HUGE stickler for the rules. He says dinner is at five o'clock, he expects it to be cooked, garnished, and ready to serve at five on the dot, and not a minute later."
"And if what Mips said is right and Tatanga's brainwashing brings out their innermost thoughts and feelings, I get the feeling we're going to be walking into a strict dictatorship," Mario mused.
"Oh yeah." Daisy nodded. "Even before all this, he was bad. One time..."
"Princess?" ROB cut in. "We have arrived at the entrance to Sankaku City."
"Ooh, lucky us, you'll get to see for yourselves. C'mon!"
With that, Daisy made for the door when…
"Hold it! We're underwater, remember?" Luigi pointed out, patting his neck. "You see any gills here?"
"Not to worry!" E. Gadd declared. "I came prepared!"
He made his way to a nearby supply closet and opened it up, revealing…
"...are those frog onesies?" MP asked in disbelief.
"No, they're Frog Suits ," he corrected.
"They're Power-Ups," Mario explained. "We used them to save Princess Marina at the Seaside Kingdom."
"They let you breathe underwater and swim really fast!" Luigi added. "And they even change color when you put them on!"
"But... they're frog onesies ," MP repeated, her face red and scrunched with embarrassment and desperation.
"Says the girl with a tricked-out turtle suit," Gadd pointed out.
"Yeah, a turtle suit tricked out with nigh-indestructible armor, built-in respirators, a filtration system, and enough weapons to literally topple a kingdom. I'm sorry, but there is no chance in H… er, the Underwhere that we're wearing… oh come on!"
To MP's ire, Mario was already pulling one on, as were Luigi and Daisy. As soon as they pulled the hoods up, they changed to their colors, Daisy's turning yellow with her flower insignia on the chest.
"Miss Mary Pat, I recommend you wear the suit," ROB insisted. "Without it, your chances of drowning rise to 100%."
"Seriously? Won't my Soopa Suit work?"
"Depends," Daisy cut in. "Even if you can survive underwater, is that clunky tin tube very mobile at the bottom of the sea?"
"She has a point," Luigi admitted.
Mips groaned, then grabbed a Frog Suit. As she pulled it on, it turned magenta, the same MP insignia as on her cap appearing on the chest.
"Let's just get this over with," she sighed irritably.
"Wait!"
Suddenly, Sebas bolted toward the closet as fast as his stubby body could carry him; huffing and puffing as he grabbed a suit.
"I'll be going with you!" he shouted.
"Sebas?" Daisy exclaimed in surprise.
"I spent some time in the Muda Kingdom before entering your service, Princess," he explained as he donned the suit. "If Master Mario and the others are going to be dealing with Zamasu, they will need a guide."
"True…" Daisy grimaced. "But what about Peach? We just can't leave her with..."
She motioned to E. Gadd, who was in the middle of drawing another magic circle on the floor. "What?"
"Worry not," ROB cut in. "I will watch over the Princess while you are away."
"You sure, ROB?" Luigi asked, earning a nod from the robot.
"Medical care is among my subroutines. I tend to the Professor all the time."
"I don't need your coddling, you clunking hunk of..." Just then, E. Gadd began to wobble slightly. "Oh dear... I'm feeling a little winded."
With a thud, E. Gadd fell over onto the floor, snoring loudly among his spilled crayons.
"I advise you depart now before he wakes up," ROB suggested.
Mario nodded. "Right. C'mon, gang! Let's-a go!"
Luigi opened a hatch and the group jumped out into the water, with Sebas and Daisy in the lead and Luigi last. Soon, everyone had left, leaving ROB and E. Gadd alone.
"Now then…" ROB leaned down and picked his creator up. "Let's go get you your medicine, Professor."
"Nnnnnngh... Jarvis, you tubby twit... I warned you about sticking your head in there..."
-X-
Later...
Most aquatic kingdoms the Marios had seen looked like something out of Greek or Roman mythology mixed with science fantasy. The Muda Kingdom, however, was devoid of any Mediterranean influence (or the Mushroom World equivalent), instead favoring what could only be described as "tropical art deco"; mostly due to the angular shape of everything around it. The city streets were made of white and turquoise speckled tiles, occasionally forming mosaics of seahorse-like creatures in scenes of battle or daily life. The buildings were mostly tall and boxy, looking nearly identical save for their signage and color, which seemed to run the gamut of the entire rainbow on one street.
"So, this is the Muda Kingdom," Mario said.
"Wow… it's colorful," MP chimed in.
"It's sp-spooky…" Luigi added nervously. "Where is everyone?"
"Yeah…" Daisy said, her face scrunched in thought. "Something's wrong, this place should be bustling with divers and Dragobos right now."
"Drago...bos?" MP let out in confusion.
"Sea dragons," Sebas replied, pointing to one of the seahorse mosaics. "They look like seahorses, only they can talk. Some can even breathe fire."
"So, where are they?" Mario asked.
"Maybe they were scared off by that creepy, purple fog?" Luigi offered.
Everyone paused in confusion, especially Daisy.
"Fog?" she asked.
"Over there."
Luigi pointed ahead toward an eerie cloud of sickly purple mist ahead of them, obscuring their view of the city ahead…and seemed to be growing closer.
"Oh, shiitake!" Daisy screamed. "That's why it's abandoned! MOVE!"
"What!?"
But before anyone could do anything, the cloud reached them, revealing why Daisy reacted the way she did.
"Agh! Mamma Mia! It reeks!" Mario screamed.
"My nose! My eyes! They're burning! Ohhhhohohoooooo!" Luigi sobbed.
" Merda! What in the Mushroom World is this…!?" MP screeched, a distant whale call drowning out the final word. "Was there a spill!?"
"Worse," Sebas replied. "We've stumbled into a Dry Spell!"
"Dry Spell? More like a Cry Spell!" Luigi cut in. "It's like someone's chopping onions! Rotten onions!"
"No, you don't understand! This fog is not normal! It's the product of Madame Hua's necromancy!"
MP blinked. "Wait, what do you by necro–?"
Before she could finish, she felt her foot tap something. She looked down and found herself staring into the empty eye sockets of a fish skeleton still covered in bits of meat; its jaw hanging open dumbly.
She shrieked bloody murder, kicking it away.
"Gesù Cristo del cazzo! (1) " she shouted as she steadied her breathing. "And I thought the Dry Bones were terrifying!"
"Oh c'mon, it's just a fish skeleton," Mario said, though he was just as unnerved by the sight.
"Yeah…" Luigi chuckled. "Guess someone's sea cat decided to raid the garbage can. Errr… do they have sea cats here, Sebas?"
Sebas said nothing, he just started ahead in horror.
"Sebas?" Luigi repeated.
"Wh-what's up?" MP asked.
"Oh dear..." the butler Toad backed away slowly. "Now, you've done it."
"What do you mean?" Mario asked.
Sebas swallowed nervously. "Remember how I said Dry Spells are Hua's necromantic magic?"
"Yeah, what does…?" Mario paused, his eyes widening in realization. "Ohhhh, shiitake…"
The skeleton twitched, its eyes suddenly glowing before it turned to the heroes, letting out a monstrous hiss.
"Dry Fish!" Daisy screamed.
"Holy…!" Whatever MP was about to say was drowned out by the hissing fishbone, which lunged right at her, fangs ready to bite. She began swimming for her life, but it was clear from the clumsy, frantic flailing of her limbs that she wasn't going to make it in time. Luckily, Mario was quick on the draw, kicking the Dry Fish in the head and knocking it back.
"Nobody messes with a Marionetti!"
CHOMP!
"Yeow!"
Mario clutched his butt, feeling the ridges of exposed ribs. With a pluck, he pulled out the culprit: another Dry Fish. The piscine horror hissed at him angrily, jaws clicking like cursed castanets as it tried to take a bite out of his nose.
"Yeesh! This thing is freaky!" Mario threw the Dry Fish away, sending it into a wall, where it shattered into pieces on impact; its glowing eyes fading away into nothing as its skull sunk to the floor.
"Gotcha!" Mario pumped his fist in victory.
"Bro," Luigi cut in. "I think now might be a good time to swim for it!"
A chorus of hisses greeted their ears, revealing a trio of Dry Fish swimming for them…
"Hiiiii-YA!"
…only for Daisy's Frog Suit flipper to kick them away, smashing them all against the wall.
"Whew!" she wiped the 'sweat' from her brow. "Got'em!"
"Whew! Thanks, Daisy."
"Yeah…" Daisy let out a tired, exasperated sigh. "Seriously…was Madame Hua always this reckless with her spellcraft?"
"Why does she even do that in the first place!?" Luigi demanded.
"Madame Hua is undead herself, along with a good portion of her subjects," Sebas explained. "As such, she must regularly bathe her kingdom in deathly magic, lest they die a second death... or worse. Under Tatanga's evil spell, she must be spreading the curse even further."
"Man... an undead zombie plague," Mario shuddered. "Must be your worst nightmare, huh Mips?"
He looked around, seeing his sister was nowhere to be seen.
"Mips? Mips!"
"Where are you?!" Luigi called out.
"Uhhh... guys?"
Daisy pointed ahead, deeper into the fog, where another pair of glowing, red lights shone through. Followed by a second… then a third...then a five… then dozens, all letting out a soft, sadistic hiss.
"Ohhhhhhnoooooo..." Luigi let out as the hissing grew to a crescendo, followed by an entire school of Dry Fish swimming in.
"EYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Luigi screamed, shooting off like a torpedo.
"It's a feeding frenzy!" Sebas cried out.
"Quick, swim for it!" Mario shouted as he took off after Luigi, the others following.
-X-
Meanwhile...
MP was in a blind panic; screaming and swearing in barely coherent Italian as she desperately swam for her life from the skeletal submariner horrors. She didn't stop until her stamina gave out, leaving her breathless.
"Holy..." A muffled, metallic clunk let out as she leaned against a structure half-buried in the ground. "Skeleton, zombie demon fish… I thought this was a Kuma Kuma Kuma Bear type isekai, not a Shield Hero or Instant Death ability type!"
She sighed, catching her breath before looking around to find no sign of Mario, Luigi, or the others.
"And I'm lost… great…" She leaned her head back again, letting it hit whatever she was leaning against. "Thank you necrophobia… I knew I should've brought my Soot."
She looked down at her magic bag.
"Not even gonna ask how you're perfectly dry and not flooded. Everyone okay in there?"
A hand shot out, giving a thumbs up before darting back in.
"Okay, good," she replied before looking around. "Well, wherever I wound up, at least I'm out of that stinking death fog. And since I'm here, I might as well see if I can find the Koopa here…Wherever here is..."
Taking a moment to look around and regain her bearings, MP found herself in what looked like some kind of huge ship graveyard. Sunken, broken boats and planes dotted the landscape; massive tombstones and mausoleums for the unfortunate souls who fell there.
"Whoa… must be a popular spot." She perked. "Hold up… these don't look like Mushroom World aircraft. They normally use big, colorful blimps or Final Fantasy -style propeller airships. These look more like…" It was then that she noticed what she'd been leaning on… an old biplane.
"This plane… I swear, I've seen it somewhere!" She brushed away some of the algae and gunk and was immediately grateful she was wearing this magic frog onesie, as she would've drowned from gasping underwater. "No way… it's… I-I can't be! There's just no…!"
"HALT!"
She froze, letting out a panicked yelp.
"Hands over your head," a deep, commanding voice ordered. "And turn around. Slowly."
Swallowing nervously, MP obeyed and found herself staring down a tall, blue seahorse - a Dragobo - with a scar over its left eye and an impressively barreled chest. Behind him were several other seahorses of varying color.
"Um... I come in peace?" MP asked awkwardly, only to flinch as a bubble zipped past her head and into the plane, leaving a large dent.
"Who are you? And for that matter, what are you?" the lead Dragobo asked, looking over her in equal parts suspicion and confusion.
"Well…" she began, only to freeze as she felt her bag move. "Not now!" she whispered.
Unfortunately, this did not go unnoticed by her ambushers, who immediately grew more hostile.
"What's in that bag?" the Dragobo demanded.
"Erk!"
This was bad. She couldn't tell them they were Koopas, these guys could be like Totahmet when he was still whammied by Tatanga. Not to mention, if the bag was opened too much while they were still underwater, her "passengers" might drown!
"I said what's in the bag," the Dragobo repeated testily. "Do not make me ask again."
"Not good…" MP looked around, trying to find a way out. Just then, something yellow caught her eye. "Koopas?" She squinted and, sure enough, there were several Koopas among the seahorses. "Hang on, are those…?"
"General Muscato!" a purple Dragobo shouted as he swam forward.
"Wait… Muscato?" MP whispered.
"That bag she's holding," the purple Dragobo continued. "It's a Magic Satchel! She's a snatcher!"
Everyone assembled gasped in horror, especially the Koopas, who looked like they'd just seen those Dry Fish.
"A snatcher!?"
"I thought they left for the Easton Kingdom!?"
"She's going to take us all!"
"So…" the newly identified Muscato began. "Zamasu and the rest of the Burners sent you to find new Bombshells, did he?"
"Wh-What!? No!" MP shook her head frantically.
"Lies!" the purple Dragobo shouted, his mouth glowing with blue energy. "Eat bubble, ya frog-faced creep!"
As he charged, the bag began shaking more and a blue-shelled Koopa popped out, wearing a snorkel and mask that he had clearly found in the bag.
"Wait!" he cried. "She's not a Snatcher! She's the Blue Hood!"
The Koopas behind them froze, though the Dragobos were about to fire.
"Blue Hood!?" One of the Koopas swam in front of Muscato. "General, wait! Hold your fire!"
The Dragobos stopped as the Koopa swam forward, looking MP over and letting her get a good look at him. He had a snorkel in his mouth, his shell had red and white stripes like an old-timey swimsuit, his hands were webbed, and on his feet were red flippers… traits the blue shell and the other Koopas shared.
"What the...?" she let out.
"What? Never seen a Scooba Koopa before?" the 'Scooba' Koopa asked.
MP shook her head. "No, I haven't. But in hindsight, it makes sense. Paratroopa for the skies, Troopa for the ground, and Scooba for the seas."
"Ahem!" Muscato let out, bringing their attention back to him. "Is this true? Are you really the Blue Hood?"
The blue Koopa nodded. "She is. She's with the Mario Bros. She's saving all us Koopas for Lord Bowser. She pulled me and several others from the dungeons in Piraput." He slumped over, suddenly looking several years older. "It's been awful there... especially after the bill passed."
The blue Scooba Koopa shuddered, earning sympathetic winces from his kin. The Dragobo, however…
"Baloney!" the purple seahorse shouted. "There aren't any frog people in the Koopa Troop!"
"Fizz, hush!" Muscato ordered.
"It's true!" Fizz replied. "She's a spy for the Burners! She has to be!"
"Would a spy have this?" Deciding to chance it, MP pulled down the hood of the Frog Suit. After a moment of relief to find she could still breathe, she displayed her cap, making sure the Bowser pin was visible.
"An official Royal Koopa Pass!?" one of the Scooba Koopas shouted in disbelief.
"It can't be!" shouted Fizz. "Bowser only gives those out to his most trusted allies! How does she have one!?"
"Long story short, he gave it to me as an apology for his magician using a mind control serum on me," MP explained.
"Lame Brain…" Muscato finished. "Just as the reports said…"
MP paused.
"How did you…?" She shook her head. "Nevermind, I'll ask later. I have questions of my own. What's going on here? What are 'Snatchers' and who are the Burners?"
"That is something best discussed somewhere safer. We can explain more at our base."
"G-General, Are you sure that's wise?" one of the Dragobos asked.
"Yeah!" Fizz cut in. "That pass thing could be fake!"
"No." Muscato shook his head. "Bowser only gives them out to those who've proven themselves to be allies of the Koopas and those emblems are impossible to forge. I should know."
Mips pulled her hood back up, then held out her bag for the Koopa she'd brought out, who gladly swam back in.
"Now then, follow us and try to keep up," Muscato said, turning around. "This area is remote, but it's still not wise to be out here in the open."
With that, they swam off.
"Thanks for the save," MP said to her bag.
"No sweat," the blue koopa replied, peeking out of the bag. "You saved all our shells, it's the least I could do." His expression grew solemn. "Still, looks like things really took a nosedive here if folks are teamin' up with the Bubblers."
"You used to live here, Blue Spiny? Err…"
"Kerry. Kerry Koopa."
"Right, Kerry, do you know these Scooba Koopa?
Kerry nodded. "Friends and neighbors. Used to live in the city before things got..." He let out a soft groan. "Crud… still don't feel too good. I gotta go lie down."
"Get some rest," MP replied as Kerry sank back inside with a yawn. "I get the feeling this is something you all are gonna wanna sleep through anyway."
-X-
Later...
The Bubble Brigade escorted MP and Kerry through the ship graveyard.
"I apologize for earlier, Miss..." Muscato addressed.
"Mary Pat. Mips or MP for short. You must be General Muscato, King Zamasu's brother."
"Yes, I am," Muscato sighed, his expression turning wistful and regretful for a moment before shaking it off. "A-Anyway… I must admit. I'm surprised to discover Bowser's Blue Hood all the way here in Muda."
"I'm with my brothers, trying to help Princess Daisy with the Tatanga problem," MP explained. "He's brainwashed the leaders, making them all act on their darkest impulses."
Muscato paused. "King Zamasu has been brainwashed?"
"All of them have.. and if he was at that Council of Kings thing, then yeah."
"Really, I hadn't noticed," Fizz snarked, only to get a testy glare from his superior.
"Not now, Fizz. Save it for when we get back inside the base."
Muscato motioned ahead to a large sunken ship, resting upside down.
"Whoa..." MP let out. "That's huge."
"Come, Miss Mips," Muscato urged. "We have much to discuss."
-X-
Bubble Brigade Base
Once inside the base, Mips was in awe as they swam through the sunken galleon. Though totally submerged and rusty in places, the elegance of the ship's decor was nonetheless a sight to behold. Ornate, red carpets hung from the ceiling. Long, shorted-out hallway lights that resembled cracked lotus flowers. Intricately carved wooden stair rails that resembled long, coiling dragons (complete with heads at the ends).
"Whoa...this place is cool!" Mips let out in awe. "Kinda makes you wonder what it was like when it was still seaworthy."
However, one thing that caught her off guard was the walls. They were covered not only in wallpaper with elaborate flower patterns but posters. Lots of posters. Posters with sharp, angular illustrations similar to the murals she'd seen in the city. All depicted Dragobos fighting against other Dragobos. However, while some Dragobos looked normal, others looked more… demonic and twisted. They were black, with orange cracks about their bodies; the same color as their eyes, which glowed menacingly and were perpetually narrowed in terrible fury or malicious joy. These black Dragobo were also more elegant-looking, having more intricate fins and even fancy jewelry. But what made Mips uncomfortable were the slogans, which consisted of "Burn the Burners!" and "Bubblers Rise in the Name of Equality!".
"Is something wrong?" Muscato asked.
"Oh! Errr… no, not really. Just… looking at the posters."
"Indeed, our art department did an impressive job," Muscato said. "Really helped drum up support for our battle against the Burners."
"Burners?"
"Yeah…" Fizz cut in. "Lousy buncha fire-barfing, scum-sucking, hoity-toity sunza…" He shuddered in rage, bubbles coming out of his mouth. "I can't wait to see the looks on their stupid faces when they find out we got the Blue Hood on our side!"
"Fizz, settle down," Muscato warned.
"But General, she's the Blue Hood! If she joins the Brigade, we'll be unstoppable!"
"That is not our decision to make!" the leader snapped, causing Fizz to shrink in on himself. "Now, I believe you have work to do."
"Yeah, I'm going..." And with that, Fizz swam off.
"Well…" Mips began. "He seems… passionate."
"That's one way to put it." Muscato sighed. "As much as I appreciate Princess Daisy's support, she has a way of bringing out the worst in people."
Mips perked. "Hold on, you're allies with Daisy?"
Muscato nodded. "She's been providing support for our rebellion with money and supplies. Without her, this entire operation would never have got off the ground." His mood turned sullen. "Unfortunately, she's also given us no end of grief with her…"
"General!"
Without warning, Fizz suddenly bolted back the way he came, practically twirling with excitement.
"General! You're gonna believe who's here! Check it out! Check it out!"
Fizz turned around and waved his tail, signaling a pair of figures to swim out from around a corner… two yellow and green figures.
"Daisy!? Lu!?" Mips shouted.
"Mary Pat!?"
"Mips!"
Immediately, Luigi swam over and hugged his sister, a motion she returned just as quickly.
"Ohh! Mamma Mia, you're safe!" Luigi let out, visibly relieved that Mips was alright.
"I'm fine, bro," Mips assured. "I promise."
Luigi sighed with relief. "Good, good.."
MP blinked, looking around, seeing two of their group as missing. "Wait... where's Mario and Sebas?"
"Oooh..." Luigi winced.
"Oh great…" MP sighed. "You got separated, didn't you?
"W-We were being chased by a huge swarm of those freaky fishbone things! They split off to try and lead some away!"
"And you teamed up with your girlfriend."
"She's not my girlfriend!"
"Ahem!" Muscato let out, getting their attention. "Princess Daisy..."
"General Muscato." Daisy greeted, swimming over to him. "Whuzzup?"
Muscato sighed. "As casual and 'charming' as ever. I heard about what happened at the Council."
"Yeah… Tatanga's really borked things up. We snapped Totahmet out of it, at least. And now, we're here to slap the spell out of Zamasu too! And maybe some of his snob and stupid while we're at it."
"Woo! Burn the Burners! Burn the Burners!"
"Fizz!" Muscato shouted, shutting him up. "Princess, would you please refrain from using that kind of incendiary language around my men?"
"Hey, I'm just saying the facts," Daisy replied. "Your bro and his buddies have had this coming for a while."
"That doesn't mean...!"
"Ummm… excuse me? But, what's a Burner?" Luigi piped up.
"Right…" Muscato swam ahead, motioning them to follow. "Come with me to my study. We'll discuss matters there."
-X-
Later...
A few minutes later, the group had gathered in the ship's captain's quarters, which Muscato had repurposed into his office. In contrast to its owner's serious, professional appearance and demeanor, the room was an absolute mess. There were papers strewn about the desk. A shelf had been knocked over. The ceiling chandelier (or floor chandelier, given the location) had half of its bulbs broken.
"Pardon the mess," the general apologized. "Ever since my brother returned from the meeting, I've been… under a lot of stress and I haven't had a chance to tidy up."
"Trust me, you haven't seen Mario's half of their bedroom," MP quipped.
"Now, what's all this about Burners and Bubblers?" Luigi asked.
"Yes, of course." Muscato cleared his throat. "Here in the Muda Kingdom, there are two castes of Dragobo: Burners and Bubblers. Burners can breathe fire, and Bubblers... can't. Observe."
Muscato inhaled before blowing out a stream of bubbles.
"Uh-oh…" MP sighed. "I see where this is going. Sneetches meets the Great Butter Battle."
"I'm sorry?" Muscato asked, not understanding the reference.
"Basically, she means the Burners see themselves as better because they have fire breath," Luigi clarified.
Muscato nodded. "Indeed. Among the dragon races, the gift of flame is considered proof of our heritage. Those who lack it are not considered true dragons. As a result, we are persecuted and marginalized by our own people."
"A world of magic and dragons, and there's still racism…" MP shook her head in discontent.
"Oh yeah," Daisy agreed. "This place may look bright and colorful, but that doesn't mean everyone gets along."
"Yeah!" Fizz declared. "The Burners go around the city acting like they can do whatever they want! They get all the best jobs, all the best stuff, and we're left with whatever crud they don't want! And when the Dry Spells come in, they get to hide nice and safe in their walled city and leave the rest of us to get chewed on by fishbones!"
MP nodded. "Yep. Sneetches."
"And the worst part?" Fizz went on. "Nobody's willing to do anything about it cuz those flame-spitting slimeballs say, 'It's just the way things are'."
"Fizz, settle down," Muscato warned. "Some of those 'flame-spitting slimeballs' are my family."
"B-But you're not like them, sir!" Fizz argued. "You were born a Bubbler! And even when your brother protected you, you turned him down so you could help us!"
"Regardless, Zamasu is still my brother and I won't have anyone speak that way about him that way."
"Yeah, save all that fire for the rest of the upper crust," Daisy said.
"Right! Those guys are gonna be so sorry..."
Daisy smiled as Fizz chuckled evilly.
"Um, excuse me? Daisy?" Luigi raised a hand. "We're here to save Myuda and free Zamasu, not create a lynch mob."
"Easy Weej, we're not gonna kill him, just hurt him really, really bad and take all his stuff, and his friends' stuff," Daisy assured, earning a glare from Muscato.
"I fail to see how that will change anything," Luigi replied nervously.
"Easy: the stuck-up, snooty jerkwad dragons will get their butts kicked and the not-snooty, stuck-up jerkwad dragons finally get their equal rights."
"Uh, duuuuuuh!" Daisy and Fizz said in perfect unison, making dopey faces.
"Right..." Luigi sighed.
"And I'm now remembering my American History class," MP remarked.
"Princess..." Muscato sighed. "While the Burners have given us no shortage of grief, I did not start this rebellion just so we could replace them. We want equality, not subjugation. The people want rights. That doesn't automatically translate to a bloody coup."
"Yeah, well, all your non-bloody coups didn't exactly work out well," Daisy said bluntly. "Remember the treaty you drafted up?"
"It takes time. Time and patience. I want to do this diplomatically, to prove we're worthy of being listened to."
MP smiled. "Okay, I like this guy."
Daisy scoffed. "We don't have time for diplomacy, and when you tried it in the past, it didn't work. We tried it your way, Muscato. Now we do things my way."
"Princess, please," Muscato pleaded.
"Ah-ah-ah!" Daisy held up a finger. "Who's the one backing this rebellion?"
"You, but–"
"Right. SO! As your backer, that gives me a stake in how this little shindig is operated, right?"
"Well... yes, but-"
"AND! Since your methods have produced zip, zero, nada results… you don't really have a tailfin to float with, right?"
Muscato let out an irritated gurgle.
"Yeah, thought so. So, why don't you just kick back, relax, and take a load off, General, while I finish in five minutes what it's taken you years to do? C'mon, Fizz. Let's go address the troops."
Fizz smiled before following her out.
"Nice choice of girlfriend, Lu…" MP said flatly.
"Yeah... " Luigi perked. "Wait, no! She's not my- Ugh, never mind."
Daisy and Fizz swim out before the gathered troops.
"Attention all Bubblers!" Daisy declared. "Get the coral outta yer ears and line up front and center! I got an announcement for y'all!"
The Bubblers all lined up, standing at attention.
-X-
Meanwhile...
Mario and Sebas were being led by a squadron of Dragobo knights.
"Well, this is a bit of a sticky wicket," Sebas mused.
"Understatement of the century," Mario muttered before getting his rear lightly singed. "Yeow!"
"Quiet, you!" one knight snapped.
Mario turned to glare at him.
"Master Mario, please," Sebas begged. "Calm down."
"I can't help it, Sebas! We've been captured, they're taking us to the castle! And Mips, Luigi, and Daisy are who-knows-where!"
"All the more reason to keep our wits about us! So please, when we get to the leader, let me do the talking."
"Fine…" Mario sighed. "I just hope Luigi and MP are okay."
"Company, halt!"
The group stops at the castle, an impressive, mostly submerged structure.
"Wow..." Mario let out in awe.
"Open the gates! We have news for King Zamasu!" The gates opened up. "Alright, company, move!"
The guards crisped Mario and Sebas, urging them to move. "That means you two!"
Mario grumbled to himself indignantly as they were led into the gates. Once through, they found themselves in a sprawling, beautifully constructed city, like something straight from an Atlantis movie.
"Mamma Mia," Mario managed. "Incredible. What is this place?"
"Muda Kingdom Castle Town," Sebas replied. "Home of the kingdom's ruling elite, the Flameborn. Or Burners, as they're known colloquially.
Mario noticed a Dragobo performer doing tricks with fireballs he spat, to the amusement of the crowd.
"Let me guess. They all breathe fire?"
"Precisely."
Just then, there was a loud trumpeting noise.
"It's the king!" a knight declared.
"The king!"
"The king!"
"The king!?"
The Dragobo scrambled about, clearing a path Once they were all clear, several rainbow-colored flames sprang up, forming a lane leading right up to Mario and Sebas. Another regally dressed Dragobo swam over.
"Citizens of Castle City!" he declared. "Presenting, his Most Royal Majesty! The King of Dragons! The Sultan of the Seas! The Master of all Muda! His Grace! His Divinity! His Glory! His...!"
"Get on with it!" Zamasu's voice snapped from within the castle.
The herald jumped before clearing his throat. "All hail King Zamasu!"
With that, Zamasu swam down the lane. Mario and Sebas stood tall as he approached them, looking them over.
"The famous Super Mario," he noted. "How nice of you to pay us a visit."
"King Zamasu..." Sebas managed.
"Sebas..." Zamasu greeted, glaring at the butler and his companion with his purple eyes. "You're probably wondering why I've bothered to come all this way just to see you now, hmm?"
"Yes," Mario deadpanned. "Why would the almighty King Zamasu descend from on high to mingle with the commoners?"
"Hmph! Such cheek. But I'm not here to mingle with commoners, I'm here to mingle with you. Guards! Take Mister Mario here to the castle…" Mario braced for a fight as the guards stood at attention. "… and prepare him something to eat."
This surprised everyone. Mario blinked a few times, confused.
"Uh... what?"
"Something to eat. Food. Edible sustenance. Luncheon. Given your...portly physique, you seem like one who would be more receptive to talking on a full stomach."
Mario gave him a deadpan glare before turning to Sebas. "What should we do?"
"Do what he says. For now," Sebas advised. 'We're outnumbered and outgunned."
"Good point," Mario nodded. "Very well, Your Majesty. We will gladly accompany you."
"Very good." Zamasu nodded back. "Guards! You know your jobs. Do them."
"Yes, Your Highness!" With that, the guards swam off. Zamasu swam back to the castle, motioning for Mario and Sebas to follow
-X-
"Wow!" Mario was stuffing his face with all manner of marine delicacies. "This stuff is amazing! I've had some good seafood before, but THIS? This knocks it out of the water."
"Good to know," Zamasu said tersely, cringing at Mario's table manners. He gave Sebas a look as if to say "THIS is the hero who defeated Bowser?", getting a shrug in response. Sebas just shrugged. After a moment. Zamasu cleared his throat.
"Mister Mario..."
Mario kept eating, not hearing him.
"Mister Mario..."
Mario continued eating, still not hearing.
"Would you please stop gorging yourself and listen to me for five minutes?!"
Finally, Mario looked up. He took a napkin, wiping his mouth.
"Right, sorry. Been a while since I've had a decent meal."
"Right..." Zamasu took a deep breath, calming himself. "Anyway...I assume you're curious as to why I've gathered the two of you here instead of boiling you alive with my breath of flame?"
"The thought had crossed my mind, yeah. Not to mention, you did try to torch us back at Daisy's castle."
"Yes, well, you were with her and defending her. But rest assured, Mister Mario, I have no quarrel with you and yours. You are outsiders with no stake or understanding of my plight."
"But you have one with Daisy," Mario pointed out. "What exactly did she ever do to you to tick you off so bad?"
"Oh nothing much..." Zamasu said flatly. "Only incited a Civil War in my domain, turning my own brother against me, along with half my subjects, all out of a misguided attempt to bring about social reform."
"Oh dear..." Sebas sighed. "Princess, I warned you…"
Mario perked. "Wait, he's telling the truth?!"
Sebas nodded once. "I'm afraid so, Master Mario."
"I will not deny that Princess Daisy is a skilled warrior," Zamasu began. "Passionate, with a strong sense of justice. But her leadership skills leave much to be desired. She is too quick to temper. She is rash, insubordinate, and refuses to consider the ramifications of her actions. Her father should have placed a more... reasonable person in the mediator position."
"What exactly did she do?"
"As I said, she started a civil war."
"Let me explain, Master Mario," Sebas began. "In the Muda Kingdom, the Dragobo are divided into two castes: the Flameborn, or Burners, and the Flameless, or Bubblers."
"Let me guess. The Bubblers can't breathe fire, so they're the second-class minority?"
"They are not 'second-class'," Zamasu clarified, annoyed. "Our flames are what is needed to power the city. They make us more effective at fighting back threats. Furthermore, they're rare. We Flameborn are simply able to do things that need to be done, and the Flameless simply cannot do that. So, of course, those with the gift are given more priority over those without." He sighed. "Unfortunately, the Flameless don't see things that way. "They covet and envy our power and privilege, and vilify us. Granted, I won't deny that there are some among my people who live up to those assumptions… but not all Flameborn do. In fact, I'd been attempting to try and make efforts to change things myself… and that was when Daisy decided to get involved." He groaned, rubbing his forehead. "Why oh why did Daisy have to get involved!?"
Mario winced. "I'm afraid to ask."
"She... convinced the Bubblers to rise up," Sebas answered. "To 'throw off their chains' and 'dismantle the oppressive establishment'."
"You omitted the part where she stormed into the city, chewed me out in the middle of the square, made me look like an utter cretin, and started a class riot," Zamasu sighed. "She was utterly incapable of understanding that you cannot simply change a centuries-old caste system overnight. It takes time and patience. But no matter how I try to explain it to her, it just goes in one ear, gets beaten up, and its game ends."
He looked at Mario. "You think our troubles started with General Tatanga? That he simply brainwashed us and turned us against her. But you see, Mr. Mario, Princess Daisy is the problem, not him. She may be a princess by birth and her father may have appointed her mediator, but she is incapable of ruling. Everywhere she goes, she breeds chaos and violence, like a weed. Many times have I tried to offer council, and not just me, but several of the rulers. But, alas, she simply does not care. Every time, her response amounts to 'Dad put me in charge, so it's my call and what I say goes. If you don't like it, you should've fixed this problem yourself a long time ago.' I'm sure she's told you all manner of stories about me. How I'm stuffy, boring, and stubborn. A control freak. But there are two sides to every story. I had my guards bring you here so you may hear mine. Though, I doubt you believe me. Given my... condition."
His eyes glowed purple.
"So wait…" Mario perked. "You know you're being mind-controlled?"
"Indeed." Zamasu nodded. "A lesser mind like Totahmet or Trompal would've completely lost themselves to the spell's madness, but one such as me. I know my mind is being influenced, though I can do little about it."
"Well... I can fix that if you want." Mario stood up, picking up a heavy serving dish. "All I need to do is give you one good bonk on the head, and-"
"Will you get on with it already!?" Zamasu snapped.
"Alright, alright! You don't have to shout."
Mario walked up behind Zamasu before slamming the dish in his hand across the back of Zamasu's head with all his might. Zamasu faceplanted onto the table, a comedic bump swelling up as red and blue stars spun around his head.
"Did it work?"
Zamasu slowly sat back up, blinking. The purple in his eyes flickered before fading and disappearing. He groaned, rubbing his head as a guard standing off to the side approached, holding out a container of aspirin.
"That... was not necessary..." he groaned as he took the offered aspirin.
"You literally told me to get on with it. Although…" Mario looked at the serving dish, seeing the sizable dent in it. "I might have overdid it a bit." He set it down. "Sorry that we couldn't use Peach's Heart Power. She's... unavailable"
"So I saw." Zamasu shook his head. "Blast it, Totahmet. Well, regardless, you have my thanks."
"Any time."
Zamasu sighed before continuing. "Let me assure you now that I am free of Tatanga's spell: everything I spoke is the truth. Daisy's attempts to improve things make things worse before they get better. We're fortunate she wasn't here in the city. Otherwise… I shudder to think what would happen."
"King Zamasu!" A knight came frantically swimming in. "Your Majesty! It's an emergency! The Bubblers are invading!"
"What!?" Zamasu immediately began toward the balcony, Mario close behind. When they arrived, they discovered a huge army of Bubble Brigadiers preparing to storm the gate. And leading the crowd was a familiar girl in a yellow frog suit, backed by two other reluctant humans in green and magenta.
"Alright, Bubble Brigade, this is it!" Daisy declared. "It's time to earn your freedom! Liberty! Equality!" Fraternity! Viva la REVOLUTIOOOOOOON!"
The army cheered.
"Fraternity?" Luigi questioned.
"Ohhhhh, no…" Zamasu managed.
Mario cringed, facepalming. "Ohhhh, this is not going to end well."
Author's Note:
Uh-oh, Daisy... what have you done!? Find out next time on Adventures of the Super Mario Bros.!
Scooba Koopas are my invention, since we have land Koopa Troopas and Paratroopas.
Voice cast for this chapter:
* Muscato: Alfred Molina (Viggo Grimborn from How To Train Your Dragon: Race to the Edge, Doc Ock in Spider-Man 2, Ares from Wonder Woman 2009)
* Fizz: David Faustino (Dagur the Deranged from How To Train Your Dragon, Brandon/Starburst from Static Shock, Mako from Legend of Korra, Bud Bundy in Married... with Children)
* Kerry: Jay Baruchel (Hiccup from How To Train Your Dragon, Dave Stutler from The Sorcerer's Apprentice)