By the Bonfire: An awakening.
Ritsuka hummed to himself as he came upon the door, bringing up his hand and wrapping his knuckles against the back of it for a short moment, then lowering his hand back down.
There was a short silence, he rocked back and forth on his heels and glanced about for a second or two, during the brief interval where nothing occurred. The faint hiss of the door opening brought his attention back towards it, watching the door rise up. Smiling cordially and nodding to the person inside.
"Good morning, Medea."
"Master." She greeted him back with an equally polite tone of voice, her hood down.
It certainly made it clear that she was in a rather good mood today.
"I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"
Medea regarded him for a moment, then replied slowly. "That would depend on the nature of your visit…Do you require my services?"
He quickly shook his head. "Nothing like that, I just heard that Caffrey was here and Flann asked me to come by and check on how she was doing. He would come himself but he said something about needing to deal with Hanleth…seems he caught wind of the spider incident and was fretting over her in his own way."
Saying nothing for a moment, the Caster slowly raised a brow at him before she responded. "Your manner of speaking when in relation to the Gods is a touch less reverent than I would have expected. Or perhaps a better word for it would have been cautious? If they were in earshot, I suspect they would have taken some manner of issue with the way you described the situation."
Would they have?
Ritsuka winced. "Sorry, still used to the whole royalty thing. I'm not entirely sure how I'm supposed to conduct myself around them…Right now I'm trying to base it off my school teachers. Though I'm not sure that would help all that much."
"If you require lessons in etiquette, then I would prefer you find someone else. I have not the patience to be teaching you something along those lines."
That wasn't where he was going to go with it at all.
Rather, he would have actually thought of something more in line with someone like Caffrey for lessons in that sort of thing, or perhaps someone else instead. The Director would probably have been a good bet, she was something of a noble, so there was a good chance that she would have been able to teach him all that.
Medea sent him a flat look. "You did not even consider me, did you?"
"...Not really, no."
With a low grunt, one that was difficult to tell if she was annoyed or not, the Caster turned around and strode into the room once more, calling to him as she did so. "Still, it is fortunate that you happened by. I could very much do a second pair of eyes for this latest little creation of mine."
Oh?
He perked up a little and followed her into the room. Though he wasn't sure what sort of help he would have been, anything that Medea was making was bound to be something rather complicated and well constructed, so the idea that he would be able to give any sort of opinion would be-
"Ah, attendant. Perfect timing."
Ritsuka slowed to a halt, then stared.
Caffrey stepped forwards, a rather pleased look upon her face.
With a flourish of her wings, she puffed out her chest and clasped her hands together, soon closing her eyes and lowering her head slightly forwards. Striking a rather serene pose as she showed off the new outfit she was wearing.
On the surface? It was simple.
A plain one piece white dress that ended around her knees, there was nothing more complicated than that.
Yet there was something more to it than being a bog-standard dress, something that he couldn't quite put into words. Perhaps it was the fact that it just worked so well with Caffrey's physical appearance, as though it was an item of clothing that was so suited for her that he struggled to imagine her wearing anything else.
No, now that he looked at it, there was a touch more to it than that.
Stepping around her, he cupped his hand under his chin and hummed to himself. Pacing around the small Goddess and glancing towards the details that he had initially missed.
Swirling patterns of faint gold were embroidered into the lining, the hem of the dress extended down to the ground at the back, or rather it seemed to flow at an angle towards the back of the dress, stretching down into an extension which widened out into a smooth curve, the base of which was lined with another thin stream of golden lines.. He suspected that if she were to take flight, they would have looked much better.
Actually, now that he looked at the shape of it, from the colour patterns to the light touching of colour, he suspected that it looked more as though Caffrey would have looked like some manner of majestic bird if she were to take flight.
Still, all of that aside, the craftsmanship was incredible.
Nodding his head, he glanced towards Medea and stepped around until he was right next to her, she regarded him with an expectant look.
He raised his thumbs, smiling at her. "It looks incredible. Did you make that?"
"Of course." Medea looked rather proud for a short moment, then quickly evened out her expression. "Though it was the best that I could do with the limited materials I had on hand, the unused uniforms were rather limited when it came to potential designs. Had I access to a greater set of resources, I would have created a far more dazzling dress…but simple works just as well in some situations."
"I…I really didn't know you could do this, this is fantastic."
"Isn't it just?" Caffrey opened her eyes, moving out of the pose and then pushing herself off the ground and into the air with a light beat of her golden wings, the beaming grin of the girl was matched only by the aura she was all but bleeding. "A rather splendid attire you have constructed, your efforts have been acknowledged and are most appreciated! You may request a single boon of this Goddess!"
"...I would prefer to do without the boon of a Goddess." A beat, then they paused and hummed. "Though that might be subject to change in the future…We shall simply say that there may come a time when I call upon your assistance, Lady Goddess."
With a hum, Caffrey bobbed her head up and down. "Then I shall await the time in which you require my service, but know that I shall remember this debt well." Then her eyes turned to him. "You said his Majesty had need of me?"
"He just wanted me to stop by and check on you." Ritsuka replied, then paused and thought of something. "But if you want to stop by and check on him, I'm sure that he'd love to see what your new dress looks like."
Caffrey blinked, then gained an enthused look. "You are most correct, attendant! Not simply him, but that mortal who proclaims herself the beauty of Venus, with this dress I shall trounce her claims with ease!" with a final glance to Medea, she shot for the door and called out to them. "You have my thanks for this tribute, human!"
The pair watched her depart in silence, then Ritsuka turned to Medea. "I think that went well."
"A great deal more reasonable than the Gods of my own homeland." Medea remarked in a quiet tone of voice, moving away from him and towards the small workbench, he could already see another beginnings of a dress in the process of being made. "I suspect that having a Goddess of fortune in my debt might prove rather useful one of these days…if a certain swine from my past were summoned. It would be rather amusing to see them cursed with such dour luck."
…That basically just told him that she was going to have Caffrey curse Jason if they were ever summoned to Chaldea. "...Please don't do that if my life is in danger, and try not to cause havoc to Chaldea if he does get summoned."
There was a small pause, then Medea replied. "Will you not order me to stand down?"
"You have your reasons for not liking Jason." He simply replied, "So long as you can go about it as mature adults or at the very least not drag other people into it or force me to try and intervene, then what happens is up to you. Besides, I could always ask Caffrey to undo it after a couple days of bad luck…But please, do not go around cursing one another."
"Hmph."
Medea gave a single grunt of acknowledgment and then started to work once again.
His eyes remained on the Caster, he turned away from her and then paused as he caught sight of the clothes rack at the side of the room. Briefly sparing a glance towards the Caster and then towards the clothes once again.
Taking a step towards it, he reached out and started to pull them aside as gently as he could, glancing at the seemingly completed works with a faint hum each time he gleaned his eyes over them. Each one was just as impressive as the last, as though he'd stepped into the expensive part of a clothes shop.
If Medea told him she was a professional, he would have believed her without a second thought.
His eyes came to a halt on one particular dress.
His brows furrowed a touch as he pushed the others aside and looked over this dress with a greater degree of intensity compared to the others.
Something about it just caught his eye.
The colour was a silk sky blue, yet woven across the front of the dress like a sash across both sides was a deeper royal colour, his eyes tracked down and watched the sash coil around the length of the dress like a pair of snakes from each shoulder, until they curled away from the parting of the dress near the knees, a skywards facing arrow shape moved around.
Ritsuka stared at the dress for what felt like hours.
…It was a really nice dress-
"You could have asked."
A startled gasp escaped him, jumping away from the dress and whipping his hand from it as though it had set his fingers alight, his eyes flew towards the speaker and he froze up solid as he met the blank gaze of Medea, the woman raised a single eyebrow at him before turning back around.
"I have no problems with your admiration of my work, that was one of my first creations. I'm certain that I had someone in mind when I thought of it…though the current short Saber with blonde hair is hardly a fitting match for it."
Short Saber with blonde hair?
"You mean Nero?"
Medea released a short laugh. "That one? Hardly. Though I suppose her similarity to them is striking and she would make for an acceptable model, I could do without the consistent chatter and her attitude of how she would know better than I."
Shaking her head, the Caster continued onwards. "I refer to King Arthur…though I recall the version I encountered being rather different. Not as though I cannot work with the version you have contracted, merely that it would take a great deal more time."
Huh.
Well, that seemed like a thing.
With a final glance at the dress, Ritsuka cleared his throat and clapped his hands together. "I'll leave you to your work then…Really impressive stuff Medea, really impressive. If you need another pair of eyes or anything…I'm open to helping."
"Yes, you've certainly shown your appreciation for it." The woman replied with a touch of amusement, he felt a faint fire on his cheeks, grateful that she wasn't looking in his direction to see it. "If the moment comes again, I shall at least be able to call upon you for such things. As you were, Master."
Ritsuka all but fled the room, but the thoughts still lingered.
The thoughts hadn't left his head.
Those little ideas just kept coming back again and again and again.
It was like they were occupying every inch of his mind.
He stumbled for a short moment, catching himself a second later and resuming his jog at the same pace. Which was something he might have been able to handle had a voice not called out after a second.
"Hold for a moment, my Liege."
Slowing to a halt, he turned his head towards Verndari as they approached him, waving him down and then folding his arms behind his back. The knight stared down at him for a short moment, the fixed expression carved into the front of his helmet seemed to be much more piercing than usual.
"...Your mind is clouded, hardly something that will suit your training."
Had it really been that obvious?
The knight shifted on the spot for a moment, then spoke slowly. "Is there something that I might do to alleviate your worries, my Liege?"
Ritsuka held back a wince, it wasn't much of a worry but at the same time it was something that wasn't fading away from him any time at all. He supposed he could ask them in such a way that was more vague about the whole subject, that would probably work. With an internal nod of the head, he faced the knight and offered a thin smile.
"I mean…I have been thinking about something recently." Stepping off the running track, he moved off to where he had set the water bottles, picking up his own one and twisting the lid off. "I just…I'm not sure how I'm supposed to phrase it but…have you ever done something that probably wouldn't be considered…normal?"
The knight straightened immediately, he briefly paused at the sudden intensity they were now projecting towards him. "I believe I would require a greater clarification of what 'normal' might be, my Liege."
"Right, yeah…I mean in terms of how people look at things." He took a quick drink of his water, breathing out and then frowning. "Like…society says this one thing is normal but you're just wondering if it is really…Like you keep thinking about something that you do that society would say isn't really…right. Not necessarily bad but just…a bit weird, but you're not sure if that makes you weird for thinking about it."
Verndari stared at him for what felt like hours.
When they did speak, it was in a slightly distant tone of voice. "Does this relate to your contracting of…unscrupulous characters?"
Did they think he was troubled by his summoning of people like Aldrich and Alma?
…He could sort of work with that without giving too much away.
"I guess a little bit." That was still part of the issue, but he had explained it out loud before. "It's just that society says its weird to know about these people and I just don't see it as weird. Or I have those thoughts about talking to them and I just…I'm not sure if I'm the strange one for having them in the first place, because I know that other people would definitely say that what I'm thinking about is weird."
"...Are you asking for my personal opinion on the matter?"
"...Yeah."
Verndari's head nodded slowly. "You would be better off cutting your contract with those sorts immediately. Save yourself the burden of worrying over them by removing the very source of your conundrum. Nothing of value would be lost if they were removed."
Ritsuka supposed that was going to be his answer. "Yeah, but I feel like just ignoring the problem is going to make it worse. Because that's just going to keep coming up again and again…I feel like just facing it directly and getting a clear answer would be the best thing but…"
He trailed off, glancing to the side and biting his lower lip.
What was he worried about?
It didn't seem like that big of a deal to him in the first place.
He was sure that no one would judge him for being a little bit curious about it.
…Unless they did end up judging him for it.
It was a cynical part of his mind that really had no place there at all, he knew what sort of people were around Chaldea and how diverse their cultures were. He doubted many of them would have given it much of a second thought. Yet it wasn't really about what the Servants would think, because they would just smile and nod their heads…or say nothing at all.
It was about…
…What was it about?
What was it that was stopping him?
It was just clothes.
"...I'm just worried about whether I look weird to people, I guess. You grow up being told this is the proper way to behave but I'm just looking at it now and…I'm not so sure how that really matters. Well…I mean, if I don't have a problem with it, then what is the harm in just trying a little?"
He glanced back to Verndari, the knight staring down at him for a few moments.
Verndari's head turned away, folding his arms behind his back and taking in a deep breath.
"...The proper way to behave, you say?" He muttered, a subtle shift in his voice. "I confess that there is perhaps…some element to your words that resonate with me. It was not expected for me to become a knight at all. Rather, quite the opposite…It was not believed that I would be suited for battle."
Ritsuka couldn't help the scoff that escaped him. "You?"
Verndari gave a light chuckle at his disbelief. "Yes, saying it sounds ridiculous. I believe I have long since proved my detractors wrong but that is not the point…There was a path that was expected of me to take and yet in my heart, I knew it was not the right one. I yearned for the chance to be a knight." his head came back around, lowering itself. "With every ounce of my soul."
"...So what made you become a knight?"
"...I confessed my wishes to my parents." He simply replied, shrugging his shoulders. "I expected them to…I'm not truly what I expected. I did not wish to believe they would crush my dreams, but I was…perhaps I was not ready, but I was resigned to that."
Ritsuka rolled his lips, recalling the last time they had spoken about their parents. "They helped you though."
Verndari's posture loosened, his arms swung forwards and to his side, his head bobbed up and down silently. A breath escaped the knight, one that cracked a little. "Yes, they did. They listened to my plea and then just…they just said they expected no different from me and did all they could to support my dream. It was long, gruelling…but I never once regretted doing it. Every injury, every bruise, every strike…they were tangible marks of my dream becoming a reality. Of becoming who I knew myself to be."
His hand moved up, pressing against his breastplate for a moment, then curled his fingers inwards. "If…If I had listened to what the proper way of doing things was, then I am sure I would have lived a mildly comfortable life…Perhaps I might have found some happiness. But it would not have been me. My heart would always yearn for the struggle of knighthood."
When they phrased it like that, it sounded like they knew what the problem was in the first place.
"...If…if you had been rejected-"
"My Liege." Verndari took in a short breath. "Supposing I had been rejected…I do not know what I would have done, but I feel as though I would have strived for it all the same. My parents' support meant the world to me…but it was not their approval that I sought, it was my own. I wished to live a life that I could be proud of. That I could…accept."
They paused for a moment, then teetered his head from side to side. "This is not to say that there isn't a proper way of doing things but…I will say that sometimes, there is a need for exceptions. Or rather, some fall through the cracks who do not accept the common way of doing things."
With a long sigh, the Knight turned back to him. "That is my opinion, my Liege. I have no doubt that you are a character of good standing. Despite certain elements that surround you, there is no doubt you are a fair individual. If you wish to contract other Servants I do not approve of, that is your own choice…but it will not change my opinion of you. Regardless of what is considered proper."
"...Thanks."
A bow of the head. "You are most welcome, my Liege."
It was a bit liberating to hear that…but there was someone else he could probably speak with as well.
Someone who might understand a little more.
Ritsuka took in a deep breath, moving his hand up and knocking on the door.
He barely even finished before it swung open, the beaming face of Marie leaned forwards and met his own eyes. Brightening further - if that was even possible - and then snaking a hand around his bicep, dragging him into the room before he could even get another word out.
"Ah, Master! I'm so glad you came to visit!"
He stumbled for a moment, then paused and stared at the other figures in the room.
D'Eon was the expected one, he had come here to find them after all.
The Director being sat at a rounded table in the corner of the room? Less so.
The pale haired woman paused as she caught sight of him, in the middle of reaching towards another small biscuit. Her frazzled expression remained on her face for only a half second, then she jerked backwards and assumed a face of complete serenity, as though there was nothing amiss in the least. "Fujimaru."
"Director."
Marie all but skipped back towards the table, ushering him along with her.
"Come on, come on. I've been meaning to invite you round for some tea as well, you and Mash. But I let myself get so caught up in training that it completely slipped my mind. A bit clumsy if you ask me."
"Oh, you don't need to go out of your way-" His efforts to try and dissuade her of feeling guilt over this were quickly brushed aside, within the next moment he was placed into one of the empty chairs and now found himself sitting opposite the Director, still regarding him with a blank gaze.
"Nonsense, Master." Marie placed herself in the seat to his right, pulling themselves forwards and smiling indulgently at him. "There is plenty of lost time to make up for. Quite frankly, I've got an awful lot more respect for all those fighting Servants, the amount of work that goes into all their drills…It is really quite draining, actually."
He glanced to his left, meeting the gaze of d'Eon as they drank from their own cup of tea, letting the conversation proceed without their own input. He had come here specifically to speak with them, after all.
"In fact, you look as though you might have just come back from a workout."
Ritsuka started a little, turning towards the Queen and then wincing, glancing down at himself and fighting back the grimace. "Y-yeah, I was just doing a couple laps with Verndari…I don't smell or something, do I?"
He hoped he didn't.
"Not at all." Marie assured him with a wave of the hand. "And I wouldn't worry about anything like that. I've grown rather accustomed to the smell of sweat." she folded her arm, striking a pose and placing her hand atop her bicep. "I've been told by Leonidas that it is just the proof you've been trying your hardest!"
…That did sound like something they would say.
Someone cleared their throat, his eyes skipped towards the Director as she took hold of her own tea. "If you stumble into that command room stinking of sweat and dry-heaving…I will not be impressed. You can show off your proof of work elsewhere."
He offered a light chuckle at her, shaking his head. "I wasn't about to do something like that, really I only came over here quickly because I wanted to ask d'Eon something…"
"You have need of me, Master?" Within the span of a single breath, they lowered their cup and faced him with an unblinking gaze of focus.
Despite the sudden nature of it, he couldn't help but note how graceful it was.
A very practised motion, it seemed.
"...Just wanted to speak in private, is all." He glanced to the others on the table, then quickly brought up his hand and waved to them, in case they ended up getting the wrong idea. "More of a personal matter, not really worth thinking about. Nothing serious either, Director."
Olga raised a brow at him but otherwise said nothing, reaching across and taking one of the biscuits. "You may discuss whatever you need to with your Servants. So long as there is no harm, my permission is unneeded."
"...Very well, we may speak outside if you wish." d'Eon rose up from their seat without further argument, bowing their head to Marie for a short moment. "If you will excuse me, your majesty. I will be back in short order."
Ritsuka similarly picked himself up from his chair and made for the door, the two of them soon departing from the room and into the hallway. He continued on for a few steps until he was a comfortable enough length from the door, not too far but not too close.
He glanced about, then turned to the Saber. "There isn't anyone hovering around us in Spirit form, is there?"
D'Eon, to their credit, did not so much as blink at the sudden question before they replied. "I can sense nothing at the moment, Master. Though the presence concealment of an Assassin would naturally prevent me from sensing them…" their expression turned slightly more grim. "Is there cause for alarm?"
Swiftly shaking his head from side to side, he stepped towards them and rolled his jaw. "Nothing like that I just…you've worn all sorts of clothes before in your life, right?"
They blinked, rather slowly.
"...I have worn whatever was required of the mission at hand, yes." Their confirmation was coupled with a sense of intrigue. "Is there something that you wish to ask regarding my duties or is it one of my personal skills that is troubling to you? You may address me in whatever pronoun you feel comfortable with. I have no preference-"
"Ah, that's not…" He hesitated for a moment, then continued on. "That wasn't what I meant. I mean…you've worn mens clothes and womens clothes, right?"
"Yes."
"...Did it ever feel…odd?"
"...Odd?" D'Eon furrowed their brows, their lips drew thin. "I suppose wearing a dress made it somewhat difficult to fight in. But for the sake of espionage, it was not odd."
"...That…I mean did it make other people look at you…differently." He asked in a rather quiet tone of voice, he saw the flicker of understanding shoot through the eyes of the Saber, their expression shifted, turning slightly softer as their posture loosened. "Like…did people…was it viewed as a little weird or-"
"Master." D'Eon gently interrupted him. "There was a betting pool of what my true gender was at the Stock Exchange in London. Suffice to say that I am aware of how my appearance caused others to react. The simple fact is that I am who I am. Whatever their opinions of me, I was not prepared to change my nature purely so they would be satisfied with their own views…I neglected to join the betting pool, I was not going to put myself on display for such a thing."
Ritsuka rolled his lips inwards, bobbing his head up and down. "So it wouldn't be…strange if I was a little curious, is what you mean?"
D'Eon inclined their head. "I believe it would only be as strange as you allow yourself to believe. There is no shame in a passing curiosity in how you might look, nor should you feel pressured by the opinions of others to ignore a certain feeling. If it is something you wish to examine, if only to know for yourself, then you would have my full support."
The Saber offered a light smile. "You should feel free to pursue whatever you wish to pursue, Master. Not everyone is the same, naturally, and as such our interests are all different…Do you perhaps feel ashamed of the thoughts?"
Ritsuka winced, bringing up a hand and scratching the side of his neck. "I wouldn't really call it being ashamed but…just that it doesn't seem all that…What if it feels weird to do?"
"Then you will know and understand more about yourself, either way." They simply replied, folding their arms behind their back. A thoughtful look crossed over their features, then they nodded their head up and down. "I believe there might be someone else who could provide some clarity on the matter for you, if you fear the outcome or view it as a shame for you."
They turned around, then made for the door, pausing briefly. "If that is not a breach of privacy?"
"...I mean, if you can think of someone then sure."
"Thank you. I shall tell her Majesty that we shall be back later."
When d'Eon had told him that they had someone in mind to help him figure all of this out, this really hadn't been at all what he had expected.
Rather, they might have been one of the very last people he would expect them to call upon.
Situated at the far end of the simulator, he watched the Servant run through a series of movements that looked to be something akin to martial art forms. Yet with their eyes closed, it might have also looked something like a meditation technique. Though he admittedly didn't know all that much about it in the first place.
He leaned closer to the Saber, whispering to them as they approached the Servant. "Do you two know one another?"
"Not at all." They answered back with a shake of the head. "We have not spoken or even encountered one another before now, but I am aware of their legend and believe that they might offer some manner of insight for you on this matter. Rather…they might be uniquely suited for such a thing."
Really?
He should probably try and find out more about their legend if that was the case, because he was drawing up a lot of blanks.
Without breaking the fluidity of their movements, the Servant called out to them as they approached. "Good morning, Master."
"Good morning, Arjuna."
The Servant slowly shifted his posture, straightening themselves out, instead of his usual decorated white attire, they wore a violet coloured vest, around his collar was a bronze coloured metallic plate from one shoulder to the other, embroidered with intricate patterns into the surface.
Arjuna shifted his focus from him and onto d'Eon, they remained silent for a few moments before offering them a polite bow. "And good morning to you as well, I do not believe we have been acquainted with one another yet."
"Indeed, it is my own regret that I have not crossed your path before today." The Saber replied with their own respectful bow. "I am Chevalier d'Eon, Knight of Marie Antoniette."
The Archer paused for half a second, then hummed out in acknowledgement of the Servant, his gaze shifted from them and back towards him. "Is there a reason you wished to approach me, Master?"
D'Eon spoke up before he could have the chance, the knight stepped forwards. "It was upon my request that we came here. You might consider it a personal curiosity of mine, in regards to a certain legend of yours."
"Is that so?" Arjuna sounded faintly intrigued. "Which would that be?"
"Your tenure as a dance instructor in Matsaya." D'Eon replied, Ritsuka was suddenly rather surprised by the information. He had no idea that Arjuna knew how to dance, quickly turning his eyes onto the Servant and seeing a flash of surprise shoot across his gaze, before it quickly shifted into something else.
They looked the Saber up and down for a brief moment, then hummed. "Yes, I am aware of that. I assume this relates to my time as Brihannala."
"Yes." D'Eon replied, then paused. "Unless…Would I be correct in assuming that you are not ashamed of that time?"
"...The Exile was a rather bitter time, I shall admit." The Archer replied after only a short time, then adopted a thoughtful look. His lips drew thin and his eyes remained on the Saber. "But I do not consider my time to be shameful, no. I considered that year of my life to be somewhat…comfortable. Or perhaps it should be said that I adapted to my change in circumstances well. Though I shall ask what brought this on?"
D'Eon raised their hand in a placating fashion. "A harmless curiosity, I was merely curious in regards to one who might have been similar enough to myself. I am not one to accuse, naturally, as my own history could attest to my stance on the matter."
"...I see." His eyes flickered towards him. "...I am no less a capable fighter because of my time as a dance instructor or serving as a woman."
"...Huh?"
As a what?
He turned to D'Eon and stared at them for a moment, the Saber made a small noise and then glanced at him, then to the Archer. "May I?"
Arjuna merely hummed in affirmation, saying nothing else.
"Master." D'Eon turned to him. "It is a small part that in the final year of Lord Arjuna's exile, he served the court of King Virata as an instructor in dance and music for the Kings daughter and her friends. Brought about due to a curse from Urvashi that stripped him of his masculinity."
"Later rescinded by Lord Indra, it was supposed to last the rest of my life, but instead was limited to a single year." Arjuna commented from the side, remaining utterly stone faced as they spoke.
Ritsuka was rather reeling from the sudden situation.
"Indeed." D'Eon nodded to the Archer, then back towards him. "During this period, Lord Arjuna served as a Enuch by the name of Brihannala, effectively disguised as a woman for an entire year…and they clearly feel no shame in the task."
He stared at the Saber for a moment longer, then towards the Archer. "...Really?"
Arjuna merely nodded his head once. "I have no reason to be ashamed of the time I spent there."
That…
…Arjuna was a really famous figure and if this was a part of their legend to the point it was known to the Servants who just heard his true name, they didn't look bothered about it in the least. Then again, they were talking about it in the same breath as being cursed and exiled so he couldn't really…
"If you hadn't…you know…been cursed and exiled-"
"If that were the case, I have little doubt that the situation would have played out in much the same way." Arjuna answered quickly, but not unkindly. "It was merely that the opportunity was opened up to me through mitigating circumstances. It was simply how life played out that I found myself at the court of King Virata and as the tutor of his daughter."
"...So if you could do it all again-"
Arjuna raised a brow slightly. "Master. Is there…a point to this? Are you unsettled by my past?"
Ritsuka quickly widened his eyes, waving his hands from side to side. "No, no! Not at all, I'm a little bit caught off guard by it but…so you wouldn't personally consider there anything wrong with…being a little bit interested in that sort of thing, right?"
They gave a slow blink. "...People are free to explore their own interests. Others will always have their opinions of said interests, but I judge only by what causes harm to others. If there is no humiliation or malicious intent, they may pursue what they wish…whether we come into conflict is another part." the Archer folded his arms behind his back. "I do not consider myself a lesser man merely because of that single period of my life, no."
He stared for a few moments.
Slowly, he lowered his gaze to the ground, moving his hands and placing them on his hips.
Arjuna spoke of it as though there was no problem in the least.
It wasn't as though he was hurting anyone.
Not really, it was just for his own interests at the end of the day.
There was no problem.
"...So if someone else did that, you wouldn't have a problem?"
"I would not personally mock them, no." Arjuna replied quickly, he felt a slight pressure on the side of his head, glancing to the Archer as they watched him with some sense of intrigue, then glanced to d'Eon for a short moment and then back to him. His expression shifted for a few moments. "...I would not judge you for your interests, Master. They are yours to do with as you wish…and I would not tolerate any insult to you over them."
It probably did seem rather obvious what he was alluding to if this was the case.
He slowly nodded his head up and down, pulling a light smile at the Servant and moving his hand up, rubbing his cheek for a second and blowing out air between his lips. "Yeah, yeah thanks, Arjuna."
"If I might make a personal request, Master." The Archer gave him pause for a second, the Servant gave a faint grimace of discomfort. "I would prefer if you approached me over less personal matters. It is not that I am ashamed…merely that I do not have an interest in discussing them."
D'Eon quickly lowered their head. "The fault is mine, I am the one who brought Master here."
"I am not insulted." Arjuna replied with a shake of the head. "You are free to consult me on my personal history if you wish, merely that it is not something I am well accustomed to discussing."
He would remember that in future.
Giving a single nod to the Archer in parting, he turned around and started to walk across the room, quickly being joined by d'Eon at his side. The Saber glanced to his face before turning their focus straight ahead, speaking up after a moment, the second they passed through the doors into the hallway.
"You seem to have come to a decision, Master."
He had.
"Yeah. I have."
Back to where it all really began.
His hand wrapped against the door until a muffled voice called out from inside.
The door opened up and he stepped into the room, sure enough she was still working on the dress that she had been making earlier, thought she had clearly made leaps and bounds in the few hours that he hadn't been present. It looked close to being completed and - for whatever reason - he was looking at it and getting sailor vibes from it.
Rather odd.
"Back so soon, Master?" Medea inquired with a faint hum as she worked, never once taking her eyes off the sewing. "Not that I mind."
Ritsuka bit his lip, glancing to the rack of dresses and then back towards the Caster. "...If I were to ask you if I could wear one of the dresses, how weird would that be?"
Medea stopped moving.
The Caster slowly shifted in her seat, turning herself around to face him and then squinting her eyes. Searching his face for something by the looks of it, eventually setting the clothes down on the desk and standing up. With a rather critical eye, she advanced on him with a rather intense gaze about her.
Before he even had a chance to blink, she was standing in front of him.
Her hand grasped his chin, turning his head over to the side, looking over him back and forth, poking and prodding at his cheeks. Then turning his head up to stare at the ceiling, she leaned forwards slightly, staring at his neck for a moment, then shifted him once more.
Grabbing his arms, she held them up and rolled back the sleeved, giving gentle feels up his forearm while she did so.
"...Hmmm. Relatively athletic and not overly muscular. Certainly a soft looking face which could well pass with the addition of makeup…" Her mutters barely caught his ears, instead she let go of his arm, then reached out and placed a hand on top of his head, pulling him forwards and running her fingers through it.
He felt more like he was some sort of doll in the hands of a child at the moment.
Though he appreciated that they weren't nearly as rough as he figured a child would have been.
"Hmmm. Smooth hair as well, a small spell to grow it out to suit the rest of it…"
They let him go, then stepped away. "Hmmm. Yes, I suppose you are certainly cute enough for something like that to work with you. Inspired by one of my earlier designs? Had I known you were so interested, I might have gotten you to model for me earlier."
He was a little taken aback with how quickly they had just acclimatised to it.
"Well, I mean…" He trailed off as the Caster was already strolling across the room, immediately towards the dresses. Whipping the blue one right off the rack and turning back towards him, holding it up right in front of his body and narrowing her eyes slightly.
"Hmmmm. Yes, quite good taste. It matches your eyes, Master."
Well, that sounded nice.
"Perhaps adjustments for the rest of you to match it…though that would hardly take a few moments." She lowered the dress and strode away, waving a hand to him as she did so, almost in a dismissive manner. "Wait there until I am done."
"...This isn't a hassle, is it?"
"Hardly." Medea replied without even waiting for a single moment. "Rather, you have the form for it. So I see no reason to decline your request…It works out well for me as well, given your face is on the cusp of being to my taste when it comes to models."
Ritsuka blinked twice, then nodded his head up and down.
…He felt oddly calm about all of this now.
Maybe it was because of the words of everyone else that gave him the incentive to just have a go at this, but he figured that it was better to have a go and try it than to not do it at all. He also figured that if he had gone to Da Vinci, she would have probably gone over the top with the whole thing.
Also he figured Medea would be less disappointed if it didn't work out.
"Finished."
"That fast!?"
Medea regarded him with a flat look. "Do you mean to underestimate my skill?"
"No, just I was expecting a couple of minutes, that was like fifteen seconds!"
"Hmph." The Caster grunted as she advanced on him once again. "I'm not sure whether to be impressed that I so thoroughly demolished your expectations, or feel insulted that they were so low in the first place. Though it hardly matters." she dumped the dress into his grasp and stepped away. "Put that on."
"Uhhh…I've…never really…"
Medea let out a sigh, "Of course you haven't." snapping her fingers, she waved at him. "First thing is first, remove those. I'm certain I have the proper footwear and tights for the dress as well."
There really was a lot that went into womens clothing, wasn't there?
"O-okay."
Medea was still staring at him.
"...Could you turn around, please?"
A roll of the eyes, but she did eventually acquiesce to his request.
He stared at the mirror.
…He wasn't sure what he was supposed to feel as his reflection stared back at him, the stupefied gaze that most certainly belonged to him but at the same time, it felt so different from everything he ever thought he could describe about his own physical appearance.
Stepping forwards, he reached towards the mirror and laid a gloved hand upon it, the silken coverings extended all the way up to his elbow, rather delicate things which were surprisingly comfortable. A rather bright white which went well with the blue, or perhaps it was the clash between them that was so striking.
They reminded him of the gloves Arjuna wore.
Perhaps that was part of it? Or he could have been overthinking.
"Hmmm."
The hum of Medea behind him, he jolted and stepped away from the mirror, turning side on and glancing over the reflection. Slowly, he moved his hand up, brushing the stray hairs out of his eyes and pausing for a moment. "...I've never had my hair this long before."
"I could tell." The Caster remarked for a moment, he glanced at her face in the mirror, she was watching with her hand cupping her chin. Slowly but surely, she nodded her head up and down, a faint twitch of her lip for a half second before it evened out. "Though you are certainly no Saber…you most assuredly have promise. Yes, rather well done…You appear to be rather cute like this, Master."
He looked cute?
…Yeah.
He really did, didn't he?
What an odd thing to say about himself, but that was all he could really think.
"Pffft." A faint laugh escaped him, quickly holding his hand up to cover his mouth and turning away from the mirror. He wasn't even sure why he was laughing, but it felt as though his face was going to catch fire at any moment. It wasn't like the comment from Medea had him flustered, but he just couldn't help but laugh as he saw himself.
It wasn't that he looked silly.
…He thought he looked rather good in these clothes.
"That's…wooo…wow." He wet his lips, then turned back and glanced at his reflection once again. It lasted for a brief second, then he whipped his head back around, staring at the Caster as she looked on expectantly. "...Yeah. This is…these are surprisingly comfortable."
"Did you think I would make clothes to cause discomfort?"
He quickly shook his head. "No, not that…just that I'm not really the intended…you know, person for this sort of thing."
With a shake of the head, the Caster sighed. "Naturally I altered them, but it was rather simple adjustments to the size to accommodate you. Little more than a shift in height."
All she did was change the length of the dress?
He remained silent for a moment, then turned back around and stared at his reflection, lowering his hands and clasping them over one another.
…He felt a strong urge to do something rather odd.
Closing his eyes, he moved his hands to the skirt of the dress and pulled them aside a little, lowering himself into what was certainly a rather clumsy curtsy, but it felt natural to do something like that while dressed as he was. Rising back up and then staring at himself once more.
Medea watched his action in silence, only when it was over did she comment. "...A rather unpolished action."
He snorted. "Yeah, I'm not all that ladylike outside of this dress, you know."
…It wasn't that he really changed how he looked at himself.
They were just clothes.
…But damn if he didn't look good in them.
"...I'm certain I could have some more ideas in the future."
He only barely registered the words of the Caster, giving her a faint hum of acknowledgment. Despite all the encouragement, he had expected himself to feel embarrassed or a little ashamed when he saw himself in the mirror, heck he wouldn't have been surprised if he felt the urge to get out the clothes and dart from the room.
Though looking at himself now.
…Had he always been able to do this? It felt like a waste to find this out now.
Well…at least he found out.
Nothing had really changed, he didn't feel any different.
But…maybe things were a little clearer.
He liked the dress because it looked pretty and now he wore it so he looked pretty.
His hands moved up, circling through his long hair, done into a long ponytail, flourishing it slightly and gazing at it.
…Oddly enough, he suited long hair.
Ritsuka felt he was learning so much today. "...I'll…Yeah, I might be back every now and again."
Medea hummed. "Good. Though I might have been inclined to bring you here regardless, good models are rather difficult to come by…The Paladin might have worked, but they are much too energetic."
Yes.
He figured Astolfo would be a bit like that.
"...I'll…I'll let you get back to your work…" He muttered quietly, despite saying that, he kept staring at his reflection.
…It wasn't like a couple of minutes would hurt.