A/N: There's three parts to this chapter (some past, present, etc). Sorry but there's lots of Kellan!

It seemed there was a festival or celebration for everything in the Seelie. But Kellan found he couldn't complain.

The latest one was to celebrate a rare kind of flower blooming, one which wasn't found anywhere else in the Land Under the Hill. The golden flowers seemed to glow, the faeries gathering around nearby. The musically inclined played their instruments, while other faeries danced or sang, and Kellan found himself easily swept up in the excitement. When a nymph passed him a delicate glass filled with a shining liquid, for once Kellan took it, a pleasant smile on his lips as he watched the merriment. It was always tempting to join in, and he couldn't remember why he didn't join in more often.

Raising the glass to his lips, he found the drink was bubbly and sweet, as if plucked from a faerie fruit. When hands rested against his shoulder, urging him to drink more, he obliged, finding the taste a little addictive. Soon, his glass had disappeared, another appearing in his hand before he could so much as blink. Drinking some more, his smile turned into a grin when he was invited to join in the dance. Placing his glass on a tray that was offered to him, he let the faerie girl curl her hand around his, drawing him into the crowd.

It was easy to dance when one let themself go. The sweet, alluring tones of the music guided them into swaying, before the cheerier tunes made them move faster. Soon he was spinning and spinning, and he looked up at the sky and laughed, because it seemed to be moving with him. Being spun from one faerie to the next, their faces became a blur, although their smiles were imprinted in his mind. Their laughter and giggles seemed perfectly attuned to the music.

He stopped long enough to see Ethos watching from the side, and Kellan held out his hand, beckoning him to join in. Ethos looked nice in the bold black, gold and tan colours that he'd dressed in for the occasion, and Kellan smiled. Everything felt so freeing. It was fun to feel like he had no responsibilities, and to be so accepted, and he almost wished it could stay like that forever.

When Ethos didn't move closer, Kellan took a step towards him instead, although he was suddenly clumsy, laughing helplessly as he reached up to adjust the golden circlet of leaves on his head before it could fall.

When his fingers touched it, he hesitated in sudden confusion. It did not feel right. He did not usually wear a crown… did he? Drawing his hands back, he stared at his palms. They were unscarred, completely unmarked in the slightest.

They were no longer like that, he suddenly remembered. Curling his fingers into his palms, the action was enough to ground him, and his eyes flickered open quickly, the dream fading away. Breathing heavily, he sat up, his head spinning in a different way to before as he tried to collect his thoughts.

Why did he dream such a thing? He was a long way from the Seelie. Staring at the scars on his palms, he shook his head. He had no desire to be a prince, yet why had his mind been drawn to that while he slept?

It was a strange thing to be confused by his own thoughts and the disorientation had not quite faded.

Getting up slowly, he pulled on his gloves, before starting back towards base. Maybe it was best if he didn't dwell on such thoughts.

It was easier to throw himself into his work, rather than pondering on them for too long.

Sprawled out on a couch in the main room of the Institute, Kellan's legs dangled over the armrest. His head was somewhere near his brother's legs, in a position they'd adopted since they were young. Now that they were growing, they were too big really to both fit in such a fashion, but neither one wanted to admit it.

They read in a comfortable silence, Kellan refreshing his memory by rereading the Codex, while Zach read a book about Shadowhunter weapons, finding the Codex much too boring for his taste.

From now until the end of the world,

You shall be called Jonathan Shadowhunter

For you and your kin will drive the shadows of the world away

And you will make light in dark places

And you will be called Nephilim, as it says in the book of Genesis…

For you will be of men and yet you will be of angels: both in one.

Adjusting the book, he held it above his head, staring up at the words. Kellan always found it interesting reading about the origins of the Nephilim. Men and angels in one. Sometimes he wondered what that made him. Having a faerie mother, he must have a bit of demon blood somewhere along the line, even if only a little. Yet he was still a Shadowhunter, and he still believed he could help drive away the shadows. He did not think he was that different from everyone else.

Realising that his brother had put his book down, Kellan closed his as well, glancing over at him. "What is it?" he asked, trying to read the expression in his hazel eyes.

"I want us to be parabatai. I think we'd make good ones," his brother stated, never one to skirt around a topic.

Utterly surprised, Kellan froze for a moment, before sitting up and placing the Codex beside him. "Parabatai?" he repeated, sounding uncertain. While he loved the idea of being a parabatai with his brother, he did not want to drag Zach down with him. Kellan was often questioned, especially in regards to matters involving the faeries. He did not want Zach to face the same, his loyalty always called into question. He did not want to feel he was weighing him down. "Are you sure that's such a good idea?" he couldn't help but ask. "What if you'd prefer a friend or you change-…"

Zach interrupted him, rolling his eyes. "Of course it's a good idea. We already fight together all the time. It'll only make us stronger. Besides, you are my friend."

Kellan's gaze grew serious as he watched him in silence for a moment. "And you are not asking out of some need to look out for me? I am the older brother. I don't need you to do that."

"Kellan, don't be an idiot. I know you can stick up for yourself, even if you refuse to do so sometimes," his brother retorted. "I am asking you because it makes sense. And I want to."

Kellan smiled slowly, although his mind was racing, his cheeks slightly flushed. He never dared to think he would have a parabatai, and the thought was exciting. "Then we must tell Father and arrange for the ceremony."

His brother looked satisfied, and they clasped hands to seal the agreement, both excited for what being a parabatai might bring. Kellan was well aware of what the vows entailed – to lay down one's life for the other, to travel where the other travels, and to be buried in the same place.

He could not think of a person he would want to share those vows with more than his brother.

Shh, be sure to be quiet

And don't bother to deny it

For the scouts and the trees have ears

They will hear if you betray the Unseelie

And you will wake up to their leers

So you must be quiet, my dear child

Otherwise you'll lose more than just your tongue.

ooOoo

The nursery rhyme played in Caspian's head from when he was young. It was ingrained in his memory, and he wished he could block it out. Every time he revealed something about the Unseelie for the battle, it was ever-present in the back of his mind. He was not scared of the punishment, of course, as he was a long way from the Unseelie. But when he uttered their secrets, it felt wrong, as if he was betraying them.

He didn't know why it plagued him like it did. He had not wanted to leave and if he liked, he could blame the Unseelie for it all he wanted. Yet it was still where he had grown up, and there was still a part of him that was attached to it. That part would always be there.

The thought that anything he said would be passed on to the Seelie made him feel a little sick. They would use the information to hurt the Unseelie; to destroy it, if they could. And despite its shortcomings, and all the hatred he still felt bottled up somewhere inside, he did not want that.

He had always looked down on traitors in the past – punished them even – and now he was no better than one. It was ironic, really.

But the urge to protect the Hunt was even greater than the sense of betrayal. There were those who he wanted to protect there, and it was his home now, even if a dysfunctional one. He could not turn his back on the Hunt and run from the fight.

He wouldn't, even if it felt like he was going against his very nature.

After all, he was never one to run from a battle.