Dick wasn't sure how long he had been in his cell but it had been long enough for him to start having to make do with his barren environment.
Dick had tried counting the seconds to keep track of time but had given up after 5 hours. He had tried getting some sleep but it had been hard and unsettling because closing his eyes and opening them produced the same heavy blackness.
Due to his protesting bladder, Dick had to resort to making the far left corner his bathroom. Dick had stayed standing for a bit to confirm if the floor was level. He was slightly horrified over the idea of sitting on a slope and finding his pee sliding towards his safe corner. Thankfully, this did not come to pass. Dick had started pacing the cell and determined that his new quarters were 30 steps by 22 steps. He had double-checked 5 separate times.
Eventually he had managed to get some sleep but was unsettled over the fact that he wasn't able to tell how long he slept. A small voice made Dick doubt if he ever even closed his eyes. Dick was starting to consider yelling out for attention, there must be someone in the hallway guarding him. He could annoy someone and let them know he was hungry and thirsty; he wouldn't beg though. Just when Dick was working up the courage to raise his voice, a small slit at the bottom of the steel door opened and a dark hand shoved a plastic tray through. Dick didn't even have time to yell out or grasp the hand before the flap dropped closed and he was thrown back into darkness. He'd been in utter nothingness for long enough that the hallway lights blinded him from the small flap.
Dick blinked, seeing a bright white outline behind his eyelids for a few minutes. It reminded him of when you looked at the sun and then saw a distorted white circle every time you closed your eyes.
He reached out and felt for the tray, but his rising hope crumbled when he felt the tray and realized it was just a styrofoam rectangle with saran-wrapped food. There was a soft apple, some half of a sandwich, and a small water bottle. Dick felt irritation rise over how small the bottle felt, it was basically one of the courtesy bottles a cheap airline supplied people with for a 4-hour flight.
He did his best to keep the styrofoam intact and took the food off. He kept the apple in his lap as he wasn't sure how sanitary the floor really was and unwrapped his sandwich. He laid out the saran wrap beside him and felt out all the bumps and folded edges.
He wasn't able to discern what the sandwich was and decided to give it a taste. He would either hurt himself by not eating or risk drugging himself with their unknown food. Dick knew he'd have to eat eventually and decided to risk it so he knew if there were drugs to be wary of at all.
Dick hummed to himself in the dark as he tasted stale bread, ham, and cheese.
"You could have thrown on some mustard, at least" Dick mumbled. He wasn't sure how long it had been since he was left in here but knew that he shouldn't let his voice grow hoarse as it often led captors to believe their victim was weakening.
Dick tapped his fingers as he tried to think of a new song. He had run through literally all of the songs he could think of and didn't want to resort to just talking out loud, even that was a tad weird, he thought.
He had tried to bug whoever was on the other side of his cell door but had been unsuccessful so far. He was keeping count of how many times the flap opened by separating the bottles of water he got, so far he had 11. This could mean anything depending on how many times a day they were feeding him. Cobb could also be trying to throw off his internal clock by feeding him inconsistently as well. Dick was aware that he was dealing with professionals and sadists; they knew what they were doing. Dick suspected there was a heat vision camera in the cell as well because as soon as he started counting his water bottles, his food trays started changing. Sometimes he received 3 sandwiches and no water and other times he was given cold soup and 2 waters. Dick wasn't sure if this was to throw off his internal timekeeping method or if it was just what their servants were giving him.
Dick knew he had 11 bottles but he had been given food of some sort 13 times. Dick wasn't sure how often he got sleep either and was conflicted on if he should try to rest more or find a way to plan more effectively. There was little he could do in such desolate darkness. Sometimes he found himself waking up but was second guessing if he had even opened his eyes because the lack of light was so consuming. He had tried his best to make a plan or at least think of a backup plan for when he was allowed out of his cell.
He had even tied the plastic wrap together and looped in loosely around itself. He had tried a few times to crouch before the flap and hand the plastic noose in front of the door to catch the hand that fed him, but this was always unsuccessful. At the moment, Dick was repeatedly clenching his eyes and opening them suddenly to see what weird static-like shapes he could create. He was playing with the little floaties that floated across his vision in the dark but knew that mundane things were better than alternatives like begging or going mad.
Dick knew he was a people person but his drive and determination were far greater than his need to be in other's company. It was a desire and a want, not a need. He told himself this so that he could stave off any bothersome loneliness that tried to creep in when he had moments of utter stillness. Moments where the darkness seemed suffocating and all-consuming. Where the air, and the inability to see his own fingers, tried to crawl in through his mouth and ears and squeeze his chest until he cried out.
Dick cringed as he chucked another plastic bottle. The boredom was starting to eat at him, along with the smell of his piss corner. He had taken to throwing his trash and leftover food at the opposite wall, just to hear something. Despite this, he cringed at the sudden loud and abrasive sounds that resonated around him from the plastic-smacking concrete. Dick couldn't see the wall before him so he had trouble determining when the bottle would hit each time.
He knew he was acting immaturely, he should be sacrificing his pride to get his captors' attention and begin negotiations, if possible. He couldn't help himself, he hated to imagine any option of working with the Court of Owls after what his foggy memories had told him.
Even now, Dick had some memories meander back to the forefront of his mind. Memories of training and studies that left him feeling colder and more lonely.
On top of all of this, Dick was fretting over his brothers. Where were his brothers? Were they alright? Were they being treated like him? Were they being experimented on?
Dick tried his best not to speculate as it did nothing but cause him to panic. It was hard not to let the darker thoughts consume him when he couldn't see a thing. Every now and then Dick would realize that he couldn't hear anything inside his cell or outside either. He would have no warning when his little flap would open and Dick had taken to just looking away from the blinding sliver of light. He was stuck in a cyclical cycle of panic and depression.
At this point, Dick had slightly lost count of how many times someone had slid food to him. He knew it was less than 30 and more than 21, he was pretty sure at least.
Dick was humming out loud at every odd dissonate intonation he could think of. Humming a c major and then going up to a g sharp before switching to an e flat and then c again. He had tried asking his guards if they had any song requests but his calls were always left unanswered. He heard the metal to his left shift for a second and Dick flinched at the sound before clenching his eyes and looking away. He held his breath when the metal made a different sound and he whipped his head to the door just as the entire door opened. Dick clenched his eyes shut and turned his head away as he stumbled to his feet. Dick couldn't see anyone at first as he was blinded by the hallway light but felt the approach of someone. He jerked as his upper arms were gripped and he was manhandled out of the cell and into the hallway.
Dick hissed as the hallway lights seemed to burn through his eyelids and into his throbbing brain. He did his best to tuck his head down and away but couldn't seem to escape the penetrating light. Dick found himself stumbling as he was pulled down a corridor swiftly. After a few short turns, Dick was released and he struggled to find his footing. Dick tried opening his eyes and after a few attempts, he managed to open them into a squint. His vision was blurry from tears gathering in his eyes as his retinas burned ferociously.
"I'll give you a moment Gray Son. I know how sensitive your eyes can be", a deep voice articulated before him.
Dick wiped at his eyes with the back of his hands as he did his best to focus on the older man before him. As usual, Cobb was dressed immaculately. He was observing Dick with an unreadable expression.
"Ahhhhh, there we go. Those lovely eyes are finally showing themselves"
Dick felt his face heat with embarrassment as he remembered Dr. Leslie stating that Dick's eyes usually changed color when he was stressed or feeling fluctuating emotions.
"I'll be honest, your room service sucks," Dick said as he tried to play off how vulnerable he was feeling. As he was able to look around more and adjust to the brightness, Dick noticed that they were in a much larger room. It looked like some sort of martial arts training studio. The cement walls were covered in thick wall and floor padding for grappling and the far wall was lined with close combat weapons like staffs, knives, swords, and spears.
Cobb ignored his sass as he paced closer to Dick, forcing the younger man to back up slightly. His back hit 2 guards behind him, cutting off his escape. Cobb reached out and grasped his chin, tilting his face left and right before nodding to himself. "It appears as if some time to yourself did have its intended effect" Cobb said as if he was pleased. Dick scowled, "How long was I in there?"
Cobb ignored him again, "I want us to run through the basics today to see where your limits are after a year of relaxation"
Dick's eyes bulged incredulously, "Did your spies tell you I was vacationing? Sorry old man, you need better spies"
Cobb's lips ticked up briefly in amusement before he motioned to the mats behind him, "Shall we?"
Dick scowled as he was shoved forward to the center of the floor. Behind Cobb, Dick noticed that Lincoln was wrapping his hands in material tape.
"I'm not performing for you" Dick spat, "I'm not some circus dog"
"No, but you are a circus brat" Lincoln replied cooly and quickly as he prowled forward from behind Cobb.
Dick glared, "Oh look who it is. Kiss ass number 1" Dick said with false brightness.
Lincoln smirked, "Come on, you're gonna fight one way or another. We all know you're feeling vulnerable enough as it is. Take your free opportunity to throw a punch. You won't get punished for any fighting in this room…Dickie"
Dick froze at the name and felt ice water crawl up his spine and neck. Was Lincoln just using Jason's name as a taunt or was this because the Court had his brothers somewhere.
"Let me see my brothers" Dick demanded. "I pinkie promise to be good after that" .
Lincoln smirked again, "How about you listen to orders and when you've been good for long enough, your Grandmaster will consider polite requests"
Dick's fake smile dropped, "Naaaaah. I'd rather see them. Now"
Lincoln stepped forward and without taking his eyes off Dick, plucked a dull spear off the wall, "Your funeral"
"Actually" Dick quipped, "I already had one. Did you not get an invite? Sorry, I wasn't there to oversee the invites. I was too busy being dead and all. Kind of your fault"
Suddenly, Lincoln swung out his staff at Dick's head. Dick ducked just in time and lunged for Lincoln's legs. He grasped his ankles together and was in the process of shoving them both to the ground when the wooden staff slapped down on the back of his head. Dick cursed as his grip loosened, allowing Lincoln to jump away.
Dick threw out a kick that Lincoln leaped over. Lincoln swung down again and smashed the staff down where Dick's side was moments ago. Dick scrambled to his feet and backflipped away to put space between them.
"I see what you mean," Cobb said to Lincoln as he countered Dick's movement backward.
Lincoln made another move at Dick without warning. Without even tensing his thighs, Lincoln sprung forward and slashed at Dick continuously. Dick didn't have any room or time to counter, he was stuck on the defense and flipping around to avoid being hit. Every few moments, Dick would catch sight of Cobb watching behind them, closer to the door. He was leaning casually against the wall, observing them like a school teacher. It made Dick's blood boil.
The moment Dick took his eyes off Lincoln he felt the air escape his lungs. The older man smashed his bow staff into Dick's cheek, throwing him to the side. Dick stumbled wildly as he tried to keep from falling completely. Lincoln stayed close and the moment Dick tried to catch himself he was hit again and again. Dick couldn't keep up and was caught in a rising tide of sharp snaps of pain. Without meaning to, his anxiety and fear were quickly boiling into frustration and anger.
Dick was losing sight of Cobb but his emotions were still targeting the older man in his mind. At one particular shot, Dick caught the staff aiming for his chest. Dick locked eyes with Lincoln and felt his breath coming out in rough furious pants. He clenched his teeth and yanked his hands down. He only meant to yank the staff away from Lincoln but ended up snapping the staff completely. Dick stumbled back from the unexpected momentum as Lincoln took a few stumbling steps to the side.
Dick got over his surprise quickly and jumped for the wall of weapons. Lincoln backed up, expecting Dick to go for him but he grabbed a small throwing knife off the wall and chucked it with all his strength past his attacker towards his main target. The room fell silent as the knife hit its mark, barely.
Cobb stepped away from the wall, tearing his suit at the elbow where the knife had pinned him to the wall. Dick noticed the smallest hint of crimson but it wasn't nearly enough. Cobb didn't let any emotion reach his eyes as he brushed off some invisible lint from his suit with a heavy sigh.
"Oooomph!" Dick was tackled to the floor as Lincoln took advantage of his attention being redirected. Lincoln used his weight to thrust Dick onto his front. Dick growled and threw his body weight to the left, rolling them over and over again like an alligator. He remembered Jason complaining about the move having no easy counter. Dick stopped suddenly when he felt Lincoln was under him. He kneed up into the other man's groin before slamming his fists down onto his chest with all his might. Lincoln's eyes ballooned as he coughed up red-tinged spit. Dick growled and grabbed his throat and shifting his weight forward in a choke. Movement out of the corner of his eyes suddenly brought him back to the present and Dick scrambled to his feet. He grabbed a larger knife and threw it at Cobb again, trying to spin it like a football; Cobb stepped out of the way.
Dick snarled in anger as he felt his hearing start to go, his vision became tunneled as he took a step towards Cobb. Lincoln jumped to his feet and snatched a longer knife off the wall behind them and stabbed down into Dick's back. Dick cried out as his body bowed under the pain and force of the thrust. He vaguely saw the tip of the knife poking out the front of his chest, opposite his heart. Lincoln pulled the short sword out as Dick collapsed onto all fours, in shock. He tried to take a deep breath but choked and was forced to spit out a glob of blood and saliva. He felt Lincoln force his head down by his neck as polished shoes came to stop before him. Dick tried to peer up but couldn't fight Lincoln's pressure on the back of his neck.
"I think you need another time out" is all Cobb said.
"Where are my brothers!" Dick cried out angrily. At least he tried to sound as angry as he felt. In reality, his voice was hoarse and shaky as he struggled past the pain.
"As soon as you stop asking after them, you will be allowed to see them" Cobb snapped coldly. He turned on his heel and left the room, leaving Dick and 2 servants in the cold room. All Dick could hear was their breathing and the drips of pink spittle and blood from his lips and chest.
Lincoln let him catch his breath before hauling him to his feet and slamming him up against a wall, chest first. Dick grunted as he turned his head to avoid his nose being crunched against the wall. As soon as he turned his head to get more comfortable, he saw one of the other talon servants approaching with a blue syringe. Dick felt dread drown all logic and senses as he bucked to get away.
"Relax, Gray Son, it is diluted" one of the nameless servants informed cooly.
"Ha, he doesn't care about that" Lincoln replied. He took the syringe from the man as the other 2 held Dick's arms and chest against the wall. He did his best to kick out at where he thought the men were but only found air. Dick hissed as he felt the needle enter his skin in a sharp searing pinch. The pinch faded instantly but the serum's pain followed soon after. Dick hissed as he felt a singing cold feeling before it quickly grew hotter and hotter until it felt like searing torrid pain rip through his neck and shoulder muscles.
Dick gritted his teeth but couldn't help from crying out once. He slammed his forehead against the wall in front of him to try and distract himself from the pain working its way through his muscles.
After a few minutes, his captors let go of his arms and Dick couldn't hold himself up any longer. The pain and shock had stripped his muscles, he realized he was falling backward just as his back hit the mats. Dick groaned weakly as the others crowded above him to haul him to his feet. Dick couldn't contain his whimper as his jostled body sent new bouts of scorching pain through his nervous system. The 2 men moved to drag his limp body down the corridor as LIncoln led them out of the training room, his feet dragging behind them.
After a few minutes, Dick realized they should have been back to his cell. "Where are we going?" Dick groaned weakly.
Lincoln sent a teasing smirk over his shoulder, "Your behavior today has proved how effective your punishment the last few weeks can be. Grandmaster wants us to up the ante"
Dick felt his stomach drop through his feet over the implication. They turned a corner and stopped before a similar-looking cell door except the inside of this one hurt Dick's eyes. The new room was entirely white. Bright white and padded. Dick was shoved into the room and he fell to his knees.
He frantically tried to push himself up and turn around but the door was slammed shut before he could even straighten his back. Dick felt panic settle in and cover him like syrup. His brain was short-circuiting and his heart was thumping at a million miles a second.
No….no. nonononononononono. Dick smashed his fist against the padded door and let out an angry cry. Was their plan to just leave him to rot and let him out every 2 weeks?! He turned around and squinted at his new cell. It was a crude and close imitation of a cell for crazy people from movies. Some cells in Arkham were designed like this.
DIck took a deep breath. Part of him appreciated the lighted cell more than the pitch-black one but he had to admit that after a few days, it was already getting to him. He had a headache and the bright lights reverberating off the blank white padding all around him only worsened his headache. The piercingness of the color made everything resonate worse in his eyes and head. Ironically, he had taken to closing his eyes for brief sessions of relief from the pounding headache the white bright on, relishing in the cool darkness behind his eyelids.
DIck had lost his cool after a few days and had started mocking Cobb and the Court from inside his cell, hoping someone heard him so he wasn't wasting his energy. The next day, Dick's meal appeared when he woke up from a nap. Dick's stomach dropped. They were drugging him somehow so he couldn't hear them come in and leave food or come in to take away the remains each time. The timing for his food and water also became more erratic so he had trouble keeping track of time and the amount of meals he received.
The biggest red flag was when Dick noticed the lights in his cell were getting brighter and brighter; a little more each day.
Dick had no idea what day it was but he felt exhausted and irritated beyond belief. He couldn't sleep anymore, he could only nap for short periods of time.
He clenched his fists and pounded them on the wall, the padding was thick enough so that he didn't feel the wall behind it. Dick began to punch more and harder, clinging to the rhythmic thumping to keep him sane when he had no one to talk to or see; not even a gloved hand.
Dick stared at the wall in front of him. He felt like a child who was crying and throwing a tantrum because they were hungry or tired but refused to admit it. Dick was exhausted. He was so tired he felt tears welling up in the corners of his eyes. The lights in the room were so bright now that he had no way of sleeping long enough to get genuine rest. Dick tried with all his might to close his eyes. He tried laying on his front or curling in a ball. He even tried removing his pants, the only clothing he had now, and wrapping them over his eyes.
He couldn't fall asleep, even though it felt like his life depended on it. The lights were just too bright and glaring.
Dick found that he couldn't look around the room freely anymore. The best he could do was pathetically sit there and accept his headache while staring straight down his body so that his figure gave a small bit of shadow to look at.
Dick wasn't proud of it but he found himself having small bouts of rage and depression. Right now he was trying to hold back the tears of hopelessness but moments ago he had been widely attacking his cell wall. He was pretty sure that feeling emotions in such opposing waves wasn't very healthy.
He wasn't allowed to keep his water bottles anymore and no one had come to see him in what felt like forever. Dick wasn't sure what to think, it felt like a long time but he hoped it wasn't that long in reality. He didn't want his brothers down here any longer. His thoughts kept straying to Bruce and turning brash and angry more often than not. Where was Bruce?!
Dick started at his cell, not even trying to hold back the tears anymore. Where were they? Where was anyone?
He felt so alone, so small, so sore, so in pain.
He was given food and water but he never saw anyone, never heard anyone. Dick tried not eating to get a reaction and get someone to physically come in to threaten him about his behavior but he started to wake up less hungry, but with needle marks on his arm.
Dick started eating again in fear of his stomach being pumped with unknown fluids to keep him alive. He started to hum and talk but that didn't help his mindset anymore. Fighting the walls sometimes did though.
Dick scrubbed his eyes with the back of his hands and stared at the tear marks over his arms and hands. He was desperate for any color besides white.
Suddenly a thought occurred to Dick and he turned over his arm to stare at the blue veins on his inner wrist….
Dick lay on his back and stared at the wall, praying to every type of God he could think of. If someone would just open the door…..
Dick wasn't sure how long ago it was but he had picking at his skin to see more color, anything besides white. He'd fallen asleep somehow and had woken up in a straight jacket. Dick had a panic attack and even then, nothing had brought Cobb or Lincoln forward. Nothing he had done had made them open the door or show a hand again. His screaming, his anger, his tears….his blood. Nothing.
Dick's chest felt hollow as he realized that he had one option left. He pushed himself to his knees and stared at his cell door. At least, where he thought the door was. Dick tried to work up the courage and thought over how to say his next words. He licked his chapped lips until they started to peel before he finally uttered, "Please"
Nothing happened.
"P-Please" he said louder. He scanned the white, white room.
"I'll cooperate. I'll train. I just want to see my brothers. I don't want to be in here!"
Dick sat still for a minute and listened to the small echo his shout seemed to leave. After a few minutes, Dick's remaining hope crumbled like a ritz cracker and he collapsed onto his butt; the tears flowing freely down his cheeks.
This is how he would die. Withering away underground as a prisoner in a white padded cell. It was so sad and lonely and claustrophobic.
Dick tucked his head into his knees and wrapped his arms around himself as felt dense heavy sorrow meld itself to his soul.
Dick couldn't stop hearing the disappointment of his brothers or Bruce's condescending voice in his ear. He could no longer fight the voices, only let them in to tarnish him further.
"I'm sorry" Dick whispered to the thought of his family.
A few minutes later, Dick vaguely heard something but he dismissed it as another memory coming back to him. The sounds and voices he'd heard since becoming a captive of the Court were too numerous and vague for him to know what was always happening.
Suddenly a sound too loud it couldn't just be in his head alerted him to someone…here?!
Dick's head shot up to see Cobb in the doorway. He was dressed in a deep blue suit and his grey and white beard didn't have a hair out of place. Dick gapped and blinked away his tears, trying to discern if he was truly delusional now.
"Would you like to come out and participate in training?" Cobb asked politely.
Dicks scrambled to his feet and nodded. His heart was racing and Dick was desperate for this to be real. He didn't know what he would do if he was truly left to rot in white nothingness. He hated himself for how good it felt to hear someone else's voice. Someone besides him. His own voice had become warped in his ears, like when you said the same word too many times and it stopped sounding like a word and more of an odd sound. Bruce would be so disappointed. The Justice League would look down on him for giving in over such a simple prolonged experience. He couldn't explain very easily how the thought of that white cell until he withered and died scared him more than being beat to death by the Joker. Jason would understand...maybe Slade.
Dick shifted on his bare feet, anxiously waiting for Cobb to let him out. He had never been this tired and was pretty sure he was feeling textbook sleep deprivation, but he was eager to escape the all-encompassing white. If their training was how he would accomplish that then he would play along for now.
Cobb stepped aside and motioned for Dick to walk past him. Dick did so quickly and spied the same few talon guards waiting in the hallway with Lincoln. He was sure the hallway lights weren't dimmed, but in comparison to the white room it felt so.
"If you cooperate, you can get some sleep and food after training, alright?" Lincoln said slowly.
Dick glared before he realized that might get him thrown back into the cell. He nodded instead and averted his eyes. He needed his strength to fight the Court properly and if training with them would help him get some proper sleep he would play along for now. He could pretend to be what they wanted until his opportunity presented itself and he would take his brothers and run.
Dick hated how their words and slow speaking made him feel like such a small child but he couldn't afford to put his ego and pride ahead of his survival, especially knowing that his brothers were down here with him.