Kimberly
"You're gonna need a bucket of holy water and an exorcist to get me anywhere near your house, girl," Trini told me.
Trini and I started working together at the same time, making us the best of friends.
I had just finished telling her about the adventure I had a few days earlier. I scrubbed the floor for two hours in order to get the smell of milk out of the house. I almost called in an expert.
Tyler spent the remainder of the day locked up in his room, blasting Nirvana for his tortured teen spirit.
"It's bad," I buried my face in my hands, "He hates me."
"He's a kid," Erika, the charge nurse for the night, waved her hand, "He hates everyone and everything. I wouldn't take it personally. Do you know how many times my kid has told me he hates me? A million. And do I take it personally? Nope. They don't mean it. Trust me."
As the years go by, his attitude seems to just get worse and worse. I don't know what to do. I'm the only one in my friend group besides Erika that has kids this old. I had my kids young, right at twenty, but I had lived the life of a twenty-five-year-old by that age.
"But he didn't say he hated me," I shook my head. "He told me to basically do my job. That hurts me more. At least if he said he hated me, I'd know he didn't really mean it. He means it. I'm a terrible mother. "
"You are not a terrible mother," Erika said, "Look, our kids are just ungrateful. They will come to their senses once they have their own kids, but for now, just shake it off."
Shake it off? How the hell do I do that? My kids are demons that have clawed their way through the gates of hell. I've failed through and through.
"I can't," I felt the tears prick in the back of my eyes, "I've done everything for them. I've given up my life so that I could support them and they're practically telling me that it was the wrong thing to do."
"And that's your problem, Kim," Trini put an arm around me. "You've given up too much. You don't have a social life, you don't have any life. Everything revolves around them—"
"—as it should," I finished. "They are my reason for everything."
Trini shook her head, "But what about you? How can you be your best self for them when you're not your best self for you?"
"Meaning?"
"Meaning you have to get out there and have a life first. Jesus, Kim, when was the last time you had a night off that didn't involve spending time with your kids? You're spent! You need a night out, away from them. Go out! Meet a guy, get drunk somewhere that's not your house for once. Live!"
"My kids would never be okay with that," I shook my head.
"And?" Erika's brows rose, "You're the adult. You make the rules."
It was tempting. God, it was tempting. A night out on the town was just what I needed, but my kids didn't know that side of me. There was a time when I owned the town. I would strut down the street, all eyes on me. I had guys begging for my number. Now I'm lucky enough to get a call back from the plumber.
I am the exact opposite of sexy.
It seems like this generation is filled with people glued to their phones or the television. When I was a kid, I played outside in the dirt. I played sports for fun, hell, I was a state champion in gymnastics. That's what they need. Time away from electronics and live in the present. The youth center was my home when I was a kid. I spent all of my time there. Maybe putting the kids in an after-school program will be just what they need in order to grow up a little.
I didn't have more time to think because a slew of people came barging in through the doors, bringing in a new patient. It was go time.
The next couple of hours went by in a blur. We had incoming patients left and right. Apparently there had been a head-on collision, throwing my Wednesday into a frenzy.
"I have a brilliant idea," Trini said as she nursed a coffee. "Why don't you take my spot at the seminar on Friday?"
"Isn't that in New York?" I asked.
"Yes! This is why it's perfect. It's the weekend, kid-free event, take a few workshops, be surrounded by other medical professionals. What more could you want?"
"How about something on this side of the country?" I looked at her. "New York is too far away. And what am I supposed to do about my kids? I can't just leave for the weekend."
"Hire a weekend sitter," she shrugged me off, "And you can leave, you just don't want to."
"They'll kill each other!" I shook my head. "They can't get along for more than twenty minutes. "
"And you can't get them out of your head for more than five. This is a good thing, Kim! Go. Enjoy yourself. Meet someone… or don't. Take the time to find yourself."
"I can't take the time off," I sighed.
"Who said you were getting time off? This is paid. You're representing us."
Now it sounded even more tempting than it had earlier.
"It's at the Hyatt," Trini wiggled her brows, making me laugh.
Was I really crazy enough to say yes?
Apparently.
"You want me to do what?" Jeffrey narrowed his eyes at me.
"For you to give me your phone," I told him, holding out my hand.
I was still upset about the way we had left things the other night. None of us had really spoken and I was waiting on an apology from Tyler and Jeffrey. Trini and Erika were right. I was the adult, and as such, it was up to me to teach them that there are consequences to their actions.
Plus, this was a good way of letting them see life without electronics for once. Once I come back from New York I'll speak to them about the youth center.
"You can't do that. This is my lifeline," he clutched his cell phone to his chest, "What if I need it for an emergency?"
"Then you are more than welcome to use a payphone."
"A payphone? What's that?" He looked at me with the blankest expression.
"A phone that you have to pay to use," I replied.
Okay, if I didn't think I had failed before, this pretty much sealed it.
"Are you kidding me? A public phone? I'll die!"
"How do you think I survived growing up?" I said, snatching the phone from his hands. "I didn't have a phone in my pocket twenty-four-seven."
"I can't believe this," he huffed, "Tyler was the one acting like a brat and I'm the one being punished."
"Sucks to suck, nerd," Tyler said, walking into my room after hearing the commotion.
"Actually," I smiled, "I'm taking both of them." I extended a hand and waited for my oldest child to give me his prized possession as well.
"What? You can't be serious."
Jeffrey smirked.
"I am serious," I nodded, "Hand it over."
"What the hell am I supposed to do? I have the bonfire with the guys this weekend." Tyler grunted.
"That's not happening," I said, sternly, "You have to stay home and help watch your brothers. I'm going out for the weekend."
"Excuse me?" Tyler craned his head, "You're going out? With who? Where? Why?"
The interrogation has begun.
"I have a work obligation, not that I have to explain myself to either one of you."
"Where is it?" Jeffrey narrowed his eyes.
"New York."
"What?" They both shouted in unison.
With that out in the open, I went into the closet and pulled out my luggage. I'm not sure when the last time I pulled this out had been. I threw it on the bed and began digging into the dresser for clothes to take to New York.
"You can't go, mom," Jeffrey shook his head, his eyes pleading with me to reconsider. "What are we going to do without you?"
"You'll survive," I told him, "I have a sitter coming over tomorrow to make sure you three don't kill each other."
"A babysitter?" Tyler groaned. "I don't need a babysitter. I'm old enough to take care of myself."
If Saturday morning was any indication as to how things would be with Tyler as a sitter, then I knew they wouldn't be great. No way could I trust him to watch his brothers.
"Oh really? Just like you were old enough to take care of the house on Saturday? The house was in shambles when I woke up. I work every day and all I ask from you is to let me get a few hours of sleep."
"That was not my fault, okay?" Tyler eyed me, "Jeffrey stole my stuff."
I could feel the tension in the room begin to build.
No. I was not going to do this again.
"You're getting a sitter. End of discussion!" I stood my ground.
Whew. I'm actually kind of looking forward to this time away. I need the distraction and some space. I love my kids, and they'll continue to be my whole world, but I need to learn to love myself too. I can't possibly survive another six years like this. Maybe the distance will be a good thing.
And taking the phone away? Genius. This will teach them to talk back to me. They get whatever they want and I'm the idiot that keeps handing it to them. They never want for anything. If one of their birthdays is coming up, I pick up extra shifts in order to make sure I have enough money to buy them what they want, and it doesn't come cheap, either. That means the latest phone, the newest video game, the top of the line bike. I kill myself at work day after day and they take everything for granted. Well not anymore. Things are going to change from now on.
"You're leaving?" Maddox came into the room, a tremble on his lip.
My sweet boy. He's the one that has my back day in and day out. He never causes me any trouble, if anything, he's the most mature out of the three. He may only be seven, but he's an old soul at heart.
The other two, well, they have their father's attitude. It's the Ames gene.
I got down to my knees to meet Maddox at eye level, "Yes, baby. I know this will be my first time away from home, but I need to do this for work."
"But you can't go," he pouted. He leaned in and whispered, "Who's going to make sure that there are no monsters in my closet?"
"Don't be such a baby," Jeffrey rolled his eyes, "There are no monsters in your closet… they're all under your bed."
"No!" Maddox cried, his eyes widening as he reached for me.
"Jeffrey!" I scolded and scooped up Maddox in my arms. I took Maddox's face in my hands and gently assured him, "That's not true, okay? Your brother is lying."
"Fine. Don't believe me," Jeffrey shrugged, "but don't say that I didn't warn you when they get you."
"Mom!" Maddox cried harder.
"Zip it," I redirected my attention to Jeffrey and furrowed my brow. This kid is something else.
"Whatever," Jeffrey threw his hands up in surrender and then splayed himself out on my bed.
"Can't someone else go?" Tyler asked as he sat on my bed. "I'm sure that there are nurses out there that don't have responsibilities at home."
"Ty," I stared at him. Where does this kid get the damn nerve? "They asked me to go. I can't say no to that."
I might have stretched the truth out in that last bit, but what they don't know won't hurt them.
"They've never asked you before." His brow rose.
"There's a first time for everything," I told him.
His arms folded across his chest. I knew this meant that he was upset, but I oddly didn't feel any guilt. I deserved it. Nothing was going to stop me.
With my three boys steaming on my bed, I did my best to ignore them.
I focused on packing my clothes instead.
I made sure to pack a little of everything. There was no such thing as overpacking or at least that's what my high school self would think.
I always had to have the best clothes, the best shoes, anything and everything to look my very best. Somewhere along the way, I lost that girl.
This might be my chance to find her again.
Author note: Shout out to my nephews that inspired this story. It's never a dull day with you three. Also, I forgot to add this to my first chapter, so forgive me, but this is an AU timeline that is set in modern times, i.e. 2020 (but what a normal 2020 should look like lol). Some names and locations will be familiar to the show, but that's it. There is no letter, no monsters, no rangers, there was no prior relationship. Everything that you need to know is coming from each chapter. So read with some fresh eyes :)