The day after Christmas is not exactly glamorous or emotional. The leftovers from yesterday's meal are eaten, the same Christmas movies continue to play on television, the snow remains stagnant, and the hangover and fatigue are always present.

Olive continued to sleep, as she was on vacation, and would take advantage of the opportunity to rest as much as possible. She always hated it when her father woke her up early to go to the kindergarten, so today she would stay in bed a little longer.

Arleth, on the other hand, had been awake since Derek went to the hospital, and although Addison would have liked to stay in bed a little longer, she had to come downstairs with her to calm her crying.

She made herself a hot chocolate with marshmallows and lay down on the living room couch watching some Christmas movies while breastfeeding the baby.

Suddenly, she heard the sound of a key in the lock and the front door opening. It was Amelia, who arrived looking completely disheveled and with smudged makeup. She looked like she had walked in the rain, but the weather that day didn't match her appearance.

She was startled to see Addison, not expecting her to be awake so early, especially in the living room.

"Amelia, where were you yesterday?" Addison asked.

"Oh, I had a patient," she lied.

"Did you? Because your brother told me that you took the day off. You weren't at the hospital and didn't come to the Christmas lunch. Where were you?"

"I spent the day with a friend, I forgot to let you know."

"Are you bleeding?" Addison asked, seeing that the bandage on her wrist was turning red.

"It was a small accident, I'm a bit clumsy."

"What happened?"

"I fell, it's nothing to worry about. I was going to get my suture kit. It's in the bathroom cabinet, right?"

"Show me your wrist."

"Addie, I'm telling you it's nothing. One or two stitches and it'll be as good as new."

Addison reached out her hand, expecting her to show the condition of her wrist. Annoyed, Amelia sighed and began to take off the bandage, revealing a deep wound that kept dripping blood.

"God, Amy. You're bleeding too much, stay here while I get the first aid kit."

"It's not necessary, I..."

"You're not going to suture yourself. Sit and wait for me here."

Addison left Arleth in her baby carrier and hurried to get her suture kit. With such a wound, was Amelia not feeling pain, or was she just minimizing it to scare her?

She got a tray, some antiseptic, bandages, and her suture kit.

"Put your arm here," she said as she handed her a tray.

"Add..."

"Listen to me, Amelia! Put your damn arm on the tray while I disinfect the wound!"

Amelia sighed, annoyed, but did as her sister-in-law said.

Addison put on her glasses and poured some liquid antiseptic on her wrist, cleaning the entire area.

"Is this glass?" she asked, noticing a suspicious green piece.

"Yeah, it could be..."

"Where did you put your hand?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know? Don't you know how you got such a wound?"

"I..."

"I'm going to give you a local anesthetic before removing the pieces of glass."

"No!" she cried alarmed.

"Why not, Amelia? It will hurt too much when I start suturing."

"No, it's worse with anesthesia, you know I can't handle it afterward. Just do it, I can endure the pain."

"Local anesthesia is not addictive, especially if it's in a wounded area and..."

"It is, Addison. If you anesthetize my arm and I stop feeling pain, when it wears off I won't be able to handle it and will want to be drugged again. I'd rather suffer now, nothing will be worse than now..."

Addison sighed, not very convinced by what she heard, but she didn't want to continue delaying. Amelia had already lost too much blood while they were talking.

She took a surgical clamp and delicately began to remove each piece of glass she found, while Amelia squeezed her eyes, enduring the pain.

Once she made sure the area was clean, she took a needle and thread and started with the first stitch.

"Ouch!" Amelia complained.

"This will hurt, I'm sorry..."

"It's okay, continue."

"You'll need at least 10 stitches and..."

"I know, do it. I trust you, your sutures are almost as great as Mark's. Ignore my complaints and continue."

Addison internally begged that Olive wouldn't wake up at that moment with her aunt's screams. She didn't even know what explanation she could give if she came downstairs and witnessed that scene.

Nervously, she turned to see the baby, who was also there, silently observing everything. Luckily, she was too young to remember this moment in the future.

She sighed and continued with the next stitch.

~•~

"We assess quickly in the ER and go to radiology." said Richard, walking quickly alongside Derek through one of the hospital corridors. They were about to transfer an excessively overweight man to the hospital.

"What if he has to be admitted? Can we get to the surgical elevator?"

"What about the freight elevator?"

"Richard, are we set up for this? I mean... our tables... Do we have enough? I don't know. Is our equipment gonna be strong enough?"

"Well, they're five minutes out. We'll have to figure it out as we go."

They approached the hospital hall, and Derek fell silent, staring fixedly at a man in a suit surrounded by his lawyers, who glared at him.

"Is that Gary Clark?" asked Richard, seeing Derek couldn't stop looking at that man with the white mustache.

"He's filled a wrongful death suit in his wife's case. I'm being deposed today."

"Chief Shepherd?" said a woman with straight hair and a suit, approaching him. "Hi."

"Yeah, hi. Whatever you're selling, just leave the samples in my office, thank you," he responded, turning around to look at her quickly.

"I'm not a drug rep. I'm your lawyer. Lauren Turner."

"Go. Don't worry, I got this," said Richard.

Derek nervously sighed and shook the woman's hand as his colleague left.

"Okay, thank you. Lauren, let's…follow me, please," he said and had no choice but to lead the lawyer to his office.

~•~

"You really did a good job with the suture, you could dethrone the arrogant Mark," Amelia said laughing once Addison finished.

"How did you do this, Amy?" he asked seriously. He was worried that Amelia would continue to laugh after everything that had happened.

"I told you, I fell."

"You fell and cut your wrist on glass? You know, Olive lies better than you." Amelia hung her head, somewhat ashamed. She didn't like lying to Addison, she was like her older sister and had always supported her in everything, without judging her.

"Where were you yesterday? Did you go somewhere with Ryan?"

"No... Ryan and I... I think we broke up."

"Oh..."

"We argued. I don't remember why, it's just... I was too drunk to remember."

"Amelia... you know you shouldn't drink."

"I know. I didn't realize when I lost control, I just know that I ended up in a bar, arguing with a bitch and..."

"Hey..."

"I don't remember what happened, Addie. I was yelling at her, she was telling me to get down from the pool table, and I fell... I think I cut my wrist with a glass I smashed. But I don't remember. They kicked me out of the bar, and I fell asleep outside, in the street."

"Did you stay out on the street all night?" she asked, scared.

"No, it was a few hours. Then I went to the trailer, took some bandages, wrapped my wrist, and went back to sleep. I know I didn't act right, I know I put my life at risk, and I know I shouldn't have drunk or argued with people in the bar. Please don't tell me again, because I already know. I was stupid and made mistakes, and I'm here to pay for them," she raised her bandaged arm.

"Okay... then I won't say anything. I know you learned your lesson," she said sarcastically.

"Please don't tell Derek about this. He'll kill me."

"I..."

"I was your patient! We have a confidentiality agreement, as my doctor you can't tell anyone what happened between us today."

"Oh, now you lean on medicine to cover yourself?"

"Addie, please. Derek can't find out about this. You know he'll kick me out of the house if he finds out I spent all Christmas drunk."

"Okay, I won't say anything. But you have to promise that you will never drink a drop of alcohol again."

"I promise."

"Okay..."

"Thank you, Addie."

~•~

"They have no case. Gary Clark is grieving. You can do me one favor in there… Try not to refer to her as "Mrs. Clark" or "she". Do not use pronouns, just stick to "the patient". It keeps it less emotional" requested the lawyer sitting across from Derek.

"Okay," he responded, forcing a friendly smile, but he was actually very distressed by what had happened.

They were both discussing the situation of the plaintiff at one of the tables in the cafeteria. Clark's wife, Allison, had died. She had cancer and had been operated on in the hospital a few weeks ago. At first, everything indicated that the surgery had gone well, however, after a few hours there were complications and she did not wake up on her own.

Gary was devastated when his wife had to be taken off life support. He insisted that she could wake up, despite the professional opinions of several doctors saying otherwise.

But at the same time, Allison had signed forms three years before her death, indicating that if her survival depended on machines, her wish would be to unplug them and let her die. But her husband did not accept this, as he insisted that it had been a long time since she signed them and that she could have changed her mind.

"So why is he here?" Derek asked after a short silence.

"Sorry?"

"Gary Clark... he shouldn't be here for this. He doesn't need to hear this..."

"He's the plaintiff. It's his prerogative. Gary Clark has no case. The hospital has acted according to her advance directives. Don't let it bother you."

"I'm worried it's gonna bother him..."

Derek's pager began to beep and he didn't hesitate to get up and go over there.

"I'm sorry, I have to go."

~•~

"What are we looking at?" Derek asked, looking at several images displayed on the light screen in the conference room.

"The patient's got a severe deep tissue infection under his belly. There's a pretty significant abscess. Hunt and I need to get in there and debride, clear out the infected fat," explained Mark, pointing to the images.

"That much sudden fat loss is dangerous," said Derek, not very convinced with what he was hearing.

"It's preferable to him dying of an infection..." Owen suggested. "But it's a risky surgery, yes."

"But we'll have Bailey and Webber on standby, in case he goes south." Mark said.

"What is the surgical risk calculation on a patient like this?"Derek asked.

"Almost too high to calculate," Bailey responded. "It's five times the risk of heart attack, respiratory failure, airway complications...

"He's diabetic, so there's a risk of Ketoacidotic coma," added Owen.

"High risk of pulmonary embolism," said Teddy.

"And believe it or not, he's malnourished, which leads to slow recovery, renal failure..." added Richard.

"Nerve damage, post-op infection..." said Mark.

"I'm saying no," Derek interrupted. "The risk is too high. That's all. Thank you very much, but that's it."

"So you're saying we're gonna send him away to die?" questioned Richard, angrily.

"I'm saying we send him to a bariatric center prepared for a type of patient like him. Instead of wasting time and resources on someone who obviously does not care for himself."

Derek left the room leaving all the doctors perplexed.

Richard got up and went after him.

"Derek, he's me. Just swap out the booze for the food. Do you think I don't care for myself? He has an illness that he cannot control. He needs help."

"I'm sorry, I..."

"That wasn't you in there. And that wasn't about Bobby Corso. It was about Gary Clark. You are seeing potential lawsuits, where you used to see patients..." he said, staring at him, "it's the job, Derek. The job can change your priorities."

"Excuse me, Shepherd...?" said Lauren, the lawyer, approaching.

"Derek, don't let it," insisted Richard.

Derek turned around, stunned by the situation.

"Tell Sloan to go ahead, open him up."

~•~

"Did you irrigate the ears to induce an ocular response?" asked Clark's lawyer.

Derek, the hospital lawyer, Gary Clark, and his lawyer were gathered in the hospital's south conference room.

"No. That was not necessary," Derek responded.

"Why?"

"The patient had a pupillary response."

"So, you saw life in her eyes?"

Derek paused briefly, exchanged a nervous glance with Gary Clark, and continued.

"There was a pupillary response."

"And yet, you declared her dead," said the lawyer.

"No, you misunderstand what I'm saying."

"Absence of a pupillary response is one of the signs of brain death. Yet, you declared her brain dead."

"I never declared her brain dead. She had minimal brain activity. Now I'm sorry... I tried to explain to you that there was absolutely no..."

"So she was alive," interrupted Clark's lawyer, "until you withdrew care, until you pulled the plug?"

"I'm sorry, I'm not being clear. Um… According to the letter of her advance directive, there was a level of brain activity that I judged to be..."

"You judged? You decided," the lawyer interrupted.

"It was my opinion to..."

Gary Clark began to cry uncontrollably, making it impossible for Derek to continue speaking.

"I'm sorry, should we stop now?" Derek said.

"Yes, I'm gonna suggest that we take a break, get ourselves together, resume later on" said Derek's lawyer. "Does that sound all right?"

Everyone nodded, and she and Derek left the conference room. He was noticeably distressed.

"Do you remember when I told you they don't have a case?" said Lauren.

"Yes."

"With respect, Dr. Shepherd, please stop trying to give them one. Do not apologize."

"Okay. If you'll excuse me for a moment, I need to talk to my wife," he said as he walked away.

~•~

"Addie..." he said with a congested voice.

"Derek? What's wrong?" she asked nervously, recognizing his distressed voice.

"Nothing, it's just that... I'm testifying about Allison Clark's case and her husband... And Mark is performing surgery that might go wrong, the risks are very high, and..."

"Stay calm, take a deep breath."

"I feel like the situation is overwhelming me. It's getting out of hand."

"It's not like that, you can handle this. How is the testimony going?"

"I can't tell you, it's confidential."

"Okay... how can I help then? Do you want me to come over?"

"No, I don't want the girls to come here right now, there's a lot of tension at the hospital...how are they?"

"Olive is eating gingerbread cookies while coloring a reindeer drawing..."

"Is she still mad at me?"

"I don't know. I told her to apologize for the underwear, and she said she would. But she's having fun now..."

"And Arleth?"

"I have her in the carrier now, she's sleeping... do you really not want me to come?"

"No. I think I should take a few days off. We need to go to New York."

"Don't do this just because Olive wants to, Derek. You have to deal with the hospital lawsuit now..."

"I need to clear my mind and take a break. I feel suffocated here, Addie. I feel like I can't breathe and..."

"Der, we'll talk about it later. Don't despair, try to calm down. Take a deep breath and go into that room to speak your truth. You know what you did and what was right. Listen to your lawyer and don't let the situation consume you."

"Okay... I love you."

"I love you too."

"I'll take a few days off and we'll go on vacation with the girls."

"Derek, focus on this now."

"Okay... see you later."

~•~

"And describe what you saw in Mrs. Clark's scans," the lawyer said.

"The patient suffered an acute hemorrhagic stroke in the left temporal lobe," Derek responded, in a much calmer tone than before.

"And based on those scans and the electrocardiogram, you recommended that care be withdrawn?" the lawyer stated.

"According to the advanced...," he paused, "yes."

"How long did that take? From seeing the time you looked at the scans until you decided to end her life... how much time elapsed?"

"We had to talk to the patient's family. Assemble an and an ethics review committee-"

"I'm talking about your assessment, Dr. Shepherd. How long did it take you to decide to recommend that she should die?"

"Less than a minute..."

"Less than a minute?"

"In my professional opinion, there was no other option."

"Thirty-two years..." Gary Clark whispered, with a lost look.

"Well, I… I think we have everything we need here," said his lawyer, interrupting.

"Allison and I were married for thirty-two years," the older man continued, "I loved her for more than… half of my life. And you decided to kill her in less than a minute?"

"Mr. Clark..." Derek said, "I'm...so sorry for your loss."

"I begged you... And you just kept saying you're sorry. You just kept saying legal this and legal that..."

"All right. This is not longer productive," Lauren interrupted.

"Gary..."

"I begged you!" he shouted furiously, standing up from his seat, "but you signed her death sentence! And you didn't even show up to do the job! You're a coward, Dr. Shepherd! You're a coward and a killer!"

Clark's lawyer took him by the shoulders and led him out of the room, trying to calm the man. Derek sighed and ran a hand through his head, trying to contain his emotions.

~•~

"Hey, Ols," Derek said, gently opening the door to the girl's room. She was sitting on the carpet next to her bed, playing with her dolls.

"Hi, Dad."

"How are you?"

"Fine."

"Do you want hot chocolate?"

"No."

"And cake? I brought you a chocolate hazelnut cake..."

"I'm not hungry."

"Don't you even want to see it?"

"No. I'm busy."

"What are you doing?"

"Girl stuff."

"Really? Like what?"

Olive looked at him, raising an eyebrow and crossing her arms. Was it so hard to understand that she didn't want to talk to him?

"Are you still mad at me?"

"Yes."

"But sweetie, Mom told me that you had fun with Tucker yesterday."

"No, we just fought because I wanted to put on a dance show, and Tuck didn't even know how to dance to Rapunzel songs."

"Sometimes situations aren't how we want them to be. Sometimes we have to adapt, let go of our previous expectations, and try to enjoy the circumstances the best we can, turning adversities into opportunities..."

"I don't understand the words you're saying."

"What I'm trying to say is that maybe it wasn't the Christmas you wanted. But it wasn't that bad. You spent your first Christmas in Seattle, experiencing how it's celebrated here. You enjoyed the moment with friends, and it was something new and different."

"And?"

"And it was something new that you wouldn't have discovered if we had been in New York."

"I don't care, I wanted to go. I would've preferred to be with Grandma and my cousins."

"I know..." he sighed tiredly. Olive was never satisfied with just anything.

"Now they're not going to want to spend any Christmas with me because I won't see them ever again in my whole life."

"Don't say that, we'll go to New York soon. Everyone wants to meet your sister."

"I don't care about her!"

"Honey, don't say that."

"Arleth doesn't care about Grandma, or the cousins, or the aunts! She only cares about Mom."

"It's because she's still very little, she only knows us, but she will also love the family."

"Well, I don't care since we're not going to see them anyway."

"Here's a proposition, we'll go the week of your birthday and celebrate it there. What do you think?"

"I don't believe you."

"I truly mean it, Ols. I'll take those vacation days, from my birthday to yours, so we can celebrate there."

"You said the same thing about Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. And we never went."

"I know, but this time it will be different. I promise. I need a change of scenery for a few days."

Olive looked at him with distrust. He had promised her the same thing several times and never delivered. What assurance did she have that he was telling the truth now? What if he canceled as the date got closer?

Derek raised his pinky finger and approached her, knowing she would recognize that gesture.

"I promise on my pinky."

"Really?" she asked, surprised. This pact from Brother Bear couldn't be used in vain, only if promises were really going to be kept.

"Yes. Do you agree?"

Olive nodded and intertwined her pinky finger with her father's, sealing the deal. This time he would do everything possible to keep his promise. She couldn't stand to see those clear eyes cry again because of him.