AN: Here we are on the new schedule! Hopefully it works for everyone. In the meantime, stay cool if you're stuck in the heat! Fall can'd come soon enough for me.
Thank you for all the support! It is very deeply appreciated!
When Severus had agreed to Draco's plan, he hadn't considered that this disastrous dinner date would entail cancelling card night with Hermione. It wasn't clear how he would break the news to her. To say he had plans and could not meet with her sounded too crude, especially if he refused to elaborate on what he was doing. If he said he had something important to do, Hermione may believe she was no longer important to him. Nothing could be further from the truth! All he wanted to do was drink piña coladas with Hermione, take her to the cleaners in cards, and forget anyone else existed. If only that choice hadn't been taken from him.
It wasn't clear how she'd react to him having a dinner with another woman. Granted, she may be able to give him tips for how to impress this mysterious business associate, but he didn't know how valuable her insights would be. It wasn't that he considered Hermione incompetent or unaware of what women wanted. Quite the opposite. She was much better than any other woman he'd ever met. She was a woman of grace, class, and intelligence. He'd never met a woman like her, something he appreciated more and more each day. One of the best parts of his day was watching her enter into her store, as he was now...
"Oh my God you're right," a voice whispered. "He does get all dreamy eyed when she walks into her store."
Severus ignored the men stocking his shelves as he watched Hermione unlock her door, wave at him and step into her bookstore. So far, nobody had harassed her about the upcoming expose on Dumbledore's Army, or at least if they did, they were discreet about it. Then again, perhaps she didn't want to tell him about being harassed, especially if she knew it could lead to him resorting to hexes to protect her. Just because he was fine with skirting a few laws didn't mean she was.
"Why dose't he just ask her out already?" The man continued. "It's clear he wants to."
"I keep telling him to ask her out, but he won't do it," another voice whispered back.
"Just seems so silly. I mean, it's clear she wants him to. She was looking at him as if he was the only man who matters in the world."
"I know, but he won't believe me."
"Are you two quite done?" Severus snapped, turning his attention to the men in his store. "I am paying you to deliver shipments of potions ingredients, not gossip about a nonexistent romance."
"Oh please, nobody could mistake that look for anything other than romance," the first man began. "It's written all over your face: you can't live without her."
"Ricardo, please remind your husband that I do not need to give you a bonus this year," Severus replied in a bored tone.
"If I do that, then I'll remind you that nobody else is as delicate with your king cobra snake skins as I am," Ricardo argued.
Severus rolled his eyes, unwilling to concede his point.
"I've never been in this aisle," Joseph rushed to his right. "What is in this purple vial?"
"Cura gripei," Severus answered.
Joseph blinked before reexamining the pink vial.
"It's a cure for the flu," Ricardo explained.
"Oh," Joseph frowned. "I still think you should sell this to No-Majes. You'd make a fortune, and save me from having to face my fear of needles every year."
"I know, but I told you…"
"That Statute of Secrecy preventing helping muggles, I know," Joseph returned the vial to its place. "I still think it's outdated."
"It might be, but we wizards have been hidden for so long, it's like second nature to us."
"Have you ever considered changing your nature?"
"Me? Yes. I'm fine being more open about who I am. The governments of the Wizarding World? Why would they ever want to abolish the Statute of Secrecy?" Ricardo huffed. "They'd lose their tax base if they changed anything."
"We can't have that, now can we?" Joseph frowned.
"Not at all."
"Secrecy or not, I want to learn all about all these potions," Joseph's eyes grew. "They all seem to fascinating. I hear about you gathering the ingredients, but to see the potions is another thing altogether."
"Severus is a great teacher," Ricardo pointed to him. "I only specialize in collecting ingredients. He's the one who can explain the ins and outs of how to create everything."
"Sure," Severus grumbled. "I'm a stellar teacher. Just ask any of my former students how wonderful I am."
"How were you as a professor?" Joseph cocked his head.
"I received perfect student evaluations each semester." Severus scowled.
"Oh," Joseph drawled. "You saw the interview, didn't you?"
"What interview?"
"The Daily Prophetis beginning their interviews of the former members of Dumbledore's Army," Ricardo sighed. "They started with Harry Potter."
"Lovely," Severus pinched the bridge of his nose.
"It wasn't terrible," Joseph noted. "Harry made it sound like you were a hero, even if you were hung up on his mother in a kinda creepy way."
"Please tell me that's where his discussion of me stopped."
"I would, but I don't make a habit of lying," Ricardo answered.
Severus sighed and slouched.
"It went into the Death Eaters," Ricardo continued. "As well as speculation that you killed Charity Burbage."
It wasn't too far from the truth, not that Severus would ever say that aloud.
"It also said you tried to seduce Professor McGonagall, but your heart was always with Professor Trelawney," Joseph added.
Severus smacked his head.
"But uh, you don't need to worry about that," Joseph forced himself to smile. "I'm sure Hermione will see right through those lies. She won't think of you any differently."
"Do you think I give a damn about what Hermione thinks?" Severus snapped.
"Yes," the couple answered, much too quickly for Severus' liking.
"No, I don't because Hermione knows me. She knows what I have and have not done. For some reason, she has accepted every part of me."
"Sounds like she loves you," Joseph noted.
"No, she sees me as a friend."
"Sure."
"Hermione isn't my concern. The fate of Malfoy Industries doesn't rely upon me impressing her."
Ricardo tilted his head. "What does that mean?"
"Nothing," Severus exhaled. "What did they say about Hermione?"
"I don't remember them saying anything about Hermione," Ricardo replied.
"They didn't even mention her role in founding Dumbledore's Army?"
"No, they just said Harry got his inspiration from a chocolate frog wrapper."
"Though they said by the end of the week they will have an interview with Marietta Edgecomb, whoever that is."
Severus pounded the table.
Joseph opened his mouth, but Ricardo shook his head. After nodding, Joseph resumed unpacking the boxes.
Severus watched them work, wondering how much longer Hermione had to suffer being overlooked for her greatest accomplishments, and being penalized for her greatest transgressions. No doubt Ron would be interviewed soon. Merlin only knew what that idiot would say. Severus wanted nothing more than to protect Hermione, to make every vile thing ever said about her vanish from the universe's memory. Like him though, she would spend the rest of her life suffering for trusting the wrong people.
Speaking of his own self-loathing: when would he ever find peace? Was there anyone who could ever accept him for who he was? Granted, Hermione already accepted him for who he was, but she was his best friend. Friends brought together by fate had an easier time accepting each other than those who came together through some other way. Yet what if there was someone else who could do that? Was there anyone else who could look past who he was to the person he is, or would Hermione be the only person who could do that? Would it be so terrible if only Hermione accepted him? Many people never found one good friend. He was lucky in that regard, much luckier than he deserved to be.
"What does this potion do?" Joseph held up a mother-of-pearl colored vial.
"That's Amortentia. It's a love potion."
"Ooh," Joseph's eyes grew.
Shit! Severus had to impress someone in a few days! With all the news coverage of him, the topic of his past would undoubtedly come up. Knowing his luck, half the night would be spent discussing who he'd been and how there was no possible way he could be reformed. The entire evening would be spent rehashing his greatest offenses with no chance of redemption.
"What's this potion?" Joseph held up a brown vial.
"That's Polyjuice," Ricardo explained. "It allows someone to take on the form of another person's body."
"You become another person?" Joseph's eyes widened.
Severus' lips curled up as an idea formed in his head. "Yes Joseph, you can become whoever you want, provided you put a part of someone, like a strand of hair, into the potion. If brewed properly, the effects last as long as you need them to."
"Ooh," Joseph grinned. "I wish I could use this in my shows. I could be three different queens in one night! The tips would be rolling in for sure."
Ricardo chuckled as Joseph flicked his wrist as if tossing coins into an imaginary hat.
"What if I told you that you could get enormous tips now?" Severus cut in
"Now?" Ricardo tilted his head.
"Indeed."
"How?"
Severus folded his hands and stepped away from his counter. "Under emotional duress, I agreed to meet with one of my godson's perspective business partners."
"Is that what's had you in such a funk all morning?" Ricardo asked.
"Indeed," Severus admitted. "The idea of answering hundreds of questions about my past is causing me great distress."
"With all these articles coming out, I can see why you'd feel that way," Ricardo admitted.
"Yes, I could spend the rest of the week wishing I were someone else, or as you so helpfully pointed out," his smile widened. "I could become someone else right now."
"Why do I already hate where this is going?" Ricardo drawled.
"I need one of your hairs," Severus kept his eyes on the top of Ricardo's head.
"Wait, you," Ricardo pointed to himself. "You want to be me?"
"For one night, yes."
Ricardo's mouth was agape.
"Wow," Joseph put the potion away. "I've heard of imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but this is a bit much."
"With all due respect, I do not know how advisable this would be," Ricardo paled.
"What is inadvisable about this? This woman has never met you, nor will she ever meet you. There is no harm in taking on your form for one evening."
"Yes, but people may see us together and not be able to tell us apart. They may believe I'm being unfaithful or doing something my husband wouldn't approve of."
"How? So long as Joseph is in on the whole ruse, there should be no harm to your marriage."
Ricardo glanced at his husband, his eyes pleading for some reprieve.
"What if the person you're meeting with wants a followup meeting?" Joseph scratched his chin. "How will you explain why you look different?"
"I will either turn her down, or we can use another of your husband's hairs," Severus argued.
"So you'll be using more than one hair?"
"No, the goal is to only use one."
"That's one too many," Ricardo argued.
Severus closed his mouth.
"I respect and care for you, I really do," Ricardo replied. "Yet even you must admit allowing you to become me is not part of my job description."
"It is a little weird for a boss to become his employee," Joseph noted.
"Yes, but it is only for one night. After that, you will never need to do this again," Severus argued.
"Can you promise that?" Ricardo demanded.
Severus twisted his lip. He could spin a tale, but Ricardo was too valuable to lose. This was already pushing their association to the limits. He'd need to tread carefully if he wanted his cooperation.
"I didn't think so," Ricardo furrowed his eyebrows. "My answer is no."
"What if I sweetened the deal?"
"How?"
"Surely, you need a potion to brew, one I can make."
"I can brew my own potions. It isn't like I cannot find the ingredients, and I have brewing supplies in my basement."
"Joseph," Severus turned to the other man. "Surely there's something you want, something I could legally give you that nobody else can."
Joseph's face was impassive. "Not at the expense of my husband."
"This isn't at his expense. Rather, I'm giving him a unique opportunity."
"To do something he doesn't want to do, which is unethical."
"It's only unethical if you two get nothing out of the deal. I can give you whatever you want, name it."
Joseph turned to Ricardo.
"For curiosity's sake," Ricardo's voce was unsteady. "Is there anything you'd want from him?"
"Are you serious?" Joseph asked.
Ricardo shrugged. "We may as well know what he's offering, if only for curiosity's sake."
Joseph returned his attention to Severus licked his lips. Severus fought the urge to smirk.
"Do me a favor and walk from that side of the room and back," Joseph pointed to the far wall.
Severus raised an eyebrow.
Ricardo flicked his wrist. "Go on, I want to see you walk."
Severus hummed before going to one side of the room, his robes billowing behind him. When he returned, Joseph leaned towards him, squinting.
"You aren't thinking of your show, are you?" Ricardo asked.
"I am."
"What about it?"
"He has the kind of look I've been searching for," Joseph answered.
"Excuse me," Severus drawled.
"Still, I can get my outfit anywhere," Joseph put a hand on his husband's shoulder. "It is your hair, and not a strand of it will be harmed so long as I am around."
Ricardo relaxed.
"Still, I want to know where he got his cape from. I want to use it in a show."
"What if I give you the cape in exchange for the hair?" Severus replied.
"No, I won't pressure Ricardo into anything he doesn't want to do," Joseph answered. "I just like to think aloud. If you won't tell me where you bought it, I'll find it myself. I know how to use the internet and find one myself."
"True, but surely you understand my dilemma, the desire to be someone else, the need to conceal one's true nature in order to accomplish a task."
"Is that what this is about?" Ricardo's eyes flashed in sympathy. "Are you afraid of being judged?"
Severus bit back his yes, though his eyes betrayed the answer.
"Anyway, we should go before you do something you're uncomfortable with," Joseph began.
"No," Ricardo took a deep breath. "I can understand the desire to wish you were someone other than who you are. Besides, this does seem to be a one time thing."
"If all goes according to plan, it will be," Severus promised.
"It's that according to plan thing which makes me nervous."
"I promise not to cause any undue damage to your reputation. I will do nothing to humiliate or harm you in any way."
"Promise me that, give Joseph the cape, and you have a deal."
"Ricardo, you don't have to do this. I can find another cape. I'll find one online," Joseph argued.
"Yes, but you won't find one like his on the internet. It's made of a material only found in the Wizarding World. One made in the muggle world won't have the movement you're looking for," Ricardo answered as Severus removed the article of clothing. "Besides, you've been saying Winona the Wonderful is growing stale."
"The audience loves her, but I'm growing bored with the routine," Joseph admitted. "It's only a matter of time before my fans pick up on that. I will affect their experience and by extension, my tips."
"So what do you plan to do with the cape?" Severus gave it to him.
Joseph wrapped it as if it were a towel, and then flicked it onto the ground. "Winona the Whip."
"The whip?"
"Yes, the kind of queen who can rope whoever she wants into her life," He wrapped the cape around Ricardo before kissing him on the cheek.
"Joseph, it's rude to flirt like that in front of others," Ricardo laughed.
"Sweetie, you haven't even begun to see flirting," Joseph beamed.
For a moment, there was a brief pang in Severus' chest, a small yearning for someone who could joke around with him in such a manner, and who wasn't afraid to touch him in front of others.
"Okay," Ricardo was still blushing. "When do you need my hair?"
"On Friday."
"I'll give it to you then," Ricardo then grew serious. "Be careful when you are me."
"I told you, I won't do anything to damage your reputation."
"I couldn't care less about my reputation. So long as my relationship with Joseph is secure, then I am fine," Ricardo answered.
"Your relationship with Joseph will be in no danger."
"I know, but I'm concerned for you," Ricardo continued. "I'm worried that everything will become too real for you. You will be lying while everyone else is telling the truth. It's easy to distort reality when the mask becomes real."
"With all due respect, I was a spy. I know the risks and rewards of what I'm doing."
"For your sake, I hope you are correct." Ricardo extended his hand. "I'll let you pluck my hair on Friday."
"Thank you," Severus took his hand and shook it, relieved that for one evening, he could escape his past.