As I write this in my sickness, I know that if even one dark soul is filled with light, then I have done at least one good thing in the eyes of the Lord. Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us sinners, especially the fanfic-writers.
As the author's openiong prayer went on, Remilia's perfect sleep was ruined by the smelll of pancakes. she thruw the lid from her coffin and stood before the portrait of Vlad Țepeș.
"Grandfather, Y must one bake pancakes in the morning? O why must it be so? O Cūr ita esse dēbet?" Remila said in the way and voices of a Vampire not of the house of Dracula.
Remila heard the ansawer from the ghost of Vlad but it was cut shortly by the wordcrafts of the red-eyed-European-Nosferatu. "Our family is Scarlet, Not Tsepesh, dear sister of mine. How many times must I remmind this to you dear sister?" The Flan siad with the voice of younger sister correcting her ealder sister about her own ethnic heritage.
"Then tell me Flandre, how many Playstations are there?" the old sister vamp inquired to the smaller one.
"Four, dear sister. the playstation is four of a kind, just like me. that's why it's my heritage game box thingy." the littler kyūketsuki said with the ways of an old girl.
"Wrong. there are 5 Playstaion now. PS5 is real, Flandre." The more aged nosferatu said unto the lesser one.
"No! that can be, dear sister! how could the worksmen of Sony do this to me? darn frickin hack dear sister!" The kinpatsu one exlaimed vulgarly in the English language.
"Flamdre! such lingua vulgaris is unfit for a lady of the house of Dracula!"
"But dear sister, we are not from the House of Dracula. how many must I say unto you dear sister?!"
Both vampires were now in a nation of infearment and had to escape. "Flandre, pack your bag! we are going to Romania!" the blue-hair one said in her voice.
"But why dear sister?" the kinpatsu one quiry back to the more old one. "To prove that I am true young descendent of Dracula! and we can buy you a PS5 too!" the Remilia declered taking her smaller sister to the East-European nation.
After the airplan fall to the ground, the two kyuuketsuki found themselves in the Romanian nation. "At last we here home! you! Romanian dude! your lord Dracula has retuned to the land! take me to mine house!" Romila said to the East-European layman.
"Who are you? dhere is no such house as that in this land. are you perhaps, one of those confused Dracula cosplayers that come here from Amerika?" the man said back unto the Vamp in a powerful Bulgarian accent.
"No. I am the young descendent of Vlad Țepeș of the House of Dracula! and why are you Bulgarian?" the nosferatu yelled to the Slavic Romanian man.
"Because of complex European history. now, are you truely nosferatu?" the layman inquired to the vampire. "Yes." Remila delceared as her smaller sister tried to refute but was cut shorter than she already was by the layman's next words.
"How many have you killed? do you repent?" the laymanm said in the way that a Bulgarian in Romania talks to a European vampire from Japan.
"Many. and I have no regrets." the European vampire from Japan throw back to the man. "I see. there is no return from such depth. by the might of the Lord, be running from this land! O servant of the Evil One!" the man said in the way that he did.
"But I refuse! I must still buy a PlayStation 5 for my flan!" Remila declared biggly.
"Dear sister!" the flan sain the way that a flan would say that that she did. As the battle begins, each takes their stance.
"Slava Bozhu! spell card activate, Gehenna River of Fire and Sin and Cross of all Salvation: Fō Za Kurisutosu Panchi! " the European dude cried out the way that a person would.
As the layman's spell card brought Remi to her last life she was made to say that she could not win. "Flandre, we most fleee to the Playstaion store!" Remila said out to the sister vampire.
"Yeah!" the Flan cheered.
As the two nosferatu ran to the Playstaion store, they bumped into a tall man that looked like he was poorly voice acted. "Who are you?" the poorly voice acted man said in the Transylvania accent.
"I am Remilia Scarlet, the young descendent of Vlad Țepeș, the son of Vlad Dracula! and this a younger sister type character named Flan." the bluer of the two kyuuketsuki said to the Transylvania man.
"But I am he, Vlad Dracula. and I have no son named Tsepesh. my son is named Alucard." the Dracula said Vladly.
"Huh? nōn est? that can't be!" Remila said in her accent.
"This man is not the Vlad you seek, dear sister. he is a character invented in the 1800s." the kinpatsu little sister type nosferatu said unto her bigger sister.
Dracula of Castlevania looked to small fry vamps and say. "You are small fry nosferatu. I have no time for this, I must prepare to steel men's souls and make them my slaves."
"But I still need a PS5!" one of the characters said.
"Hm? then take this PS5 and get out my castle! my nemesis will be here any moment." the older vampire said to his lessers. Flandre took the PS5 and returned to her red demon tea house leaving her dear sister in Transylvania with the old guy.
"Oh, and your question. we must bake pancakes in the morning because it tricks the human into thinking we one of them. now let us prepare." Dracula said countly.
With that, the two vampires began their readiness which, was a no good use of time since Richter wins in the end anyways.
The End/Za endo/Owari/終わり/