Chapter 2
Notes: Titled "Support"
He huddled deeper into the collar of his coat as the snow thick wind whipped through the street, not daring to pull his hands out to tug at his hood. It wouldn't make a difference anyway; his hood had yet to slip and not even his movement to tuck himself deeper into the fur lined collar changed that.
The weather had been pleasant enough at the beginning of their tour - barely a breeze sending what few flakes were drifting down dancing - but as the day waned, so too had the good weather. Now they trudged through the streets on their way back to the aetheryte plaza and he prayed that meant the end of their little tour. His coat - a gift from Haurchefant along with the coats both Tataru and Alphinaud were equally huddled into - was warm, sure, but he just wanted to be done with the day already.
Hunger gnawed at him.
Unfortunately for it, nausea had long since settled into his very being and even the mere thought of food was only making it worse. Having not eaten more than two plain rolls the day before was not helping matters but trying to stomach more had been a fight he lacked the strength to deal with, especially when nothing sounded good. The one bite of eggs he had managed that morning had ruined what meager appetite he had scrounged up and any sort of appetite had yet to return since.
An odd sound drew his attention, slowing his steps as his head came up. They were approaching a statue placed at the center of a water feature where another road met the one they walked, which meant an end of the expanse of buildings on his right. There was one last building between them and the plaza but it was a vague sort of noticing as his gaze settled on the sign hanging from the last of the building they were passing by.
A gun was emblazoned on the placard, the strange sounds settling into the sounds of machinery through the wind and his hood.
"Hey," he called out, drawing the others' attention. He looked to their guide, asking, "Is this someplace I can enter freely?"
The House Fortemps manservant nodded, bewilderment crossing that schooled expression. "If you wish."
He turned towards the stairs. "What is this place called?"
"That is the Skysteel Manufactory. They once were dedicated to the production of traditional arms and armor but have since shifted towards firearms and similar armaments."
The door opened onto a landing that looked down into the shop below and he was rather surprised the door had even been unlocked. It felt more like a back door rather than a secondary entrance. He shoved his hood off as he made his way down the stairs, taking in the small space. There was a door on the opposite wall once he hit the base of the stairs so there was a chance there was more to the manufactory than what he saw. Most everyone was busy with something but his movement still drew attention and he found himself suddenly under the attention of someone who reminded him vaguely of Cid. Maybe it was the goggles.
The person approached him, already talking. "Hmmm, my prospectometer seems rather fond of you. Let's see, shall we...?" He gave the stranger a confused frown that went completely ignored as said stranger did actually look him over; what even was a prospectometer? "Odd garb. Striking presence." Striking presence? He had a striking presence? "Would I be right in assuming that you are one of those adventurous types?"
He blinked. Did he mean 'adventurer'? "In a sense," he answered, hoping the not overly direct answer was answer enough.
And it seemed it was as the stranger slapped their palms together. "Ah, I thought as much!" Their hands settled on their waist. "My prospectometer seldom lies! And let me just say, you have made the right choice in visiting our humble workshop." The stranger gestured to the space around them. "Welcome to the Skysteel Manufactory, where miracles are born from aether, metal, and imagination! From cannons to ballistas, we develop and manufacture a range of weapons designed for slaying dragon invaders. But we are also accepting students who wish to take up a firearm and learn the techniques of the Machinist! What say you? Are you interested in joining us, and exploring the Machinist discipline?"
"'Machinist discipline' as in you would teach me how to use a gun?" he clarified, gesturing vaguely towards the placard displayed on the nearby counter, the same placard that had hung over the door he had entered through.
The stranger nodded, quickly adding, "Among other things. We work with machinistry - a technology that weds the genius of Master Garlond's magitek with traditional aetherology. Every single one of my latest creations employs the principles of this unique discipline and in the steady hands of trained Machinists, my new inventions are going to alter the very face of warfare!"
Echo'a chuckled. Yep, definitely reminded him of Cid. "They certainly sound more effective against the dragons than what I have at my current disposal. If you are keen on taking another student, I would be interested in taking up the offer to learn machinistry."
"You are?" Before he could even get a word in, the stranger was already talking. "Well, of course you are! Otherwise my prospectometer would not have registered your obvious interest!" He chuckled again, curious to know how few had shown interest that his own would make the stranger practically giddy. The stranger's exuberance waned at his chuckle and he bore with the mild nip of regret that followed. "Ah. Right. In my excitement, I've neglected to introduce myself. The name's Stephanivien. Stephanivien de Haillenarte. And you are?"
He blinked, surprised. "Haillenarte? Might there be relations to Francel Haillenarte?"
It was Stephanivien's turn to show surprise, though it seemed tempered with confusion. "Indeed. He is my youngest brother. Why?"
"Curiosity, mainly; I helped clear his name while working with Lord Haurchefant."
"Oh! You must be Echo'a Velundaleht, then!" Stephanivien bowed deeply. "You have my utmost thanks in assisting my brother in that nasty business. Had you not intervened, the House of Haillenarte would have suffered greatly from his loss."
"I will make sure Lord Haurchefant hears such high praise," he offered with a soft smile. "It was he who asked for my assistance on the matter, after all."
Stephanivien smiled at that. "I have no doubt. Now, as much as I am content to continue conversing, you did not arrive to our humble manufactory on your own." He blinked in surprise and followed the other's gaze to the landing above where Alphinaud and Tataru were leaning against the railing before the door watching. The young elezen gave him a gentle smile and a little wave when their eyes met while the lalafell gave an enthusiastic wave. "It is good to see House Fortemps is host to you and your companions but should you ever want for other allies, look to House Haillenarte." Stephanivien's expression softened at his bewilderment. "We are steadfast friends, our two Houses, and from what my prospectometer has revealed and the words of dear Francel, you are far from bad people." A grin broke out across Stephanivien's face. "Besides, you are to be our newest Machinist and I would be remiss to not treat you as well as I do the others. When you have time for a lesson, pray return and we shall begin by familiarizing you with the tools of the trade, so to speak. Until then, take care of yourself, Echo'a."
"Going to become a Machinist, then?" Alphinaud asked as he joined them on the upper landing.
He shrugged, tugging his hood back into place; the snow was still blowing outside when their guide opened the door. "Probably. I want something more effective against the dragons, something not limited by range or movement."
"I think it will do you good to learn a new craft." His footfall slowed at the statement, eyes falling to the other's face in surprise. Or was it confusion? Alphinaud gave him a gentle smile. "With the uncertainty of our standing with the accusations laid before us, being willing to assist our host is a very valiant use of our time here. Though, a constructive distraction can do wonders for sorrow, can it not? If it helps you, I see no fault in pursuing such endeavors." Did that mean… "Come, my friend. I believe our tour is nearly complete and I for one am starting to grow peckish."
Alphinaud got ahead of him, saving the young elezen from seeing the flicker of pain that crossed Echo'a's expression. Of course Alphinaud had noticed. How could the other not?
Still, Alphinaud was not wrong. A distraction may be just the thing to get his horrible eating habits back under control.
The stone encasing the window was cold where his head rested, the slab beneath him equally frigid despite having been sitting there for quite some time. It had not been his intent to waste away a portion the day yet the bell tolled another hour, making it at least four since he had settled in the window. His sigh fogged the glass, thoughts relentlessly repeating Nanamo's death, the banquet, the loss of their companions, all of it - an unrelenting storm that matched the one raging outside the manor window.
It was making him sick. He had tried to consume something of breakfast but a few bites in, the same thoughts rolled through his head, stealing his appetite.
His cheeks burned with shame. It wasn't as if he had been the one to consume the poison so why were the thoughts of it seeing fit to make his already existing issues with food worse?
Neither of them had been the wiser when she had lifted that accursed cup to her lips. After everything, after so much combat and forced action, he should have reacted, should have done something more than simply stand there and watch her die. He had become a White Mage so that he could heal others regardless of the situation but in that dire hour, he hadn't even bothered to rush to her side.
The fact that he had been in his Summoner gear was a poor excuse for his inaction.
A knock on the door yanked him from his thoughts and he caught the sound of the latch giving as it opened. He didn't bother to look. It would be the third time in less hours that the House Fortemps manservant came to check in on him in the hopes he would eat something. It would also be the third time he would politely decline once the manservant actually asked.
He jumped when instead Haurchefant knelt at the edge of his line of sight and he blinked owlishly at the man. He was fairly certain the man hadn't been due back for a while yet, not to mention the current storm rattling the windows. What was he doing there?
Haurchefant offered him a soft smile, oblivious, apparently, to Echo'a's confusion. "Would I come to check on how you and the others have settled in only to find you have not been consuming proper meals."
"My eating habits should be the last thing you ought to fret about," he replied, his tone amused despite the confusion in it at the man's apparent concern. Had he been missing so many meals that someone felt the need to tell Haurchefant of all people? Surely not; they had barely been there a few days. "That aside, I have been eating." Albeit, probably not enough, but that was a different matter entirely.
"So you say," Haurchefant was quick to reply, "and yet I have been told you regularly use the excuse of not being hungry to skip such meals to the point that I fear even young Alphinaud will take note despite the extent he has himself distracted."
He looked away at that, guilt and shame easily the loudest of the bitter emotions that bit into him. It had not been his intention to distance himself from Alphinaud or Tataru but the pair had dived head first into doing what they could to get information and be of use and all he wanted to do was hide himself in a closet somewhere no one would find him until his head stop shoving Nanamo's death down his throat over and over again.
Haurchefant covered his knee with a hand and encouraged, "Why don't we go down for a late supper and talk of the current troubles siphoning your appetite. Mayhaps the bit of chatter will help ease the burden preventing you from later meals as well."
It wouldn't, not really, but he wasn't about to say that. Haurchefant didn't need any more reasons to fret about him, not after everything he had done to get them safely into Ishgard. He wasn't sure if he would ever be able to repay that debt but the least he could do was choose to get to know the man and if that was over meals, then it was over meals. "Alright. Lead the way."
The meal was pleasant and Haurchefant's chatter was certainly distraction enough. He ate quite a bit, all things considered, but he inevitably hit the point where he couldn't force another bite without risking being unable to keep it down. He was certain Haurchefant noticed but the other took him at his word when he simply said he was full.
He did make an effort to attend meals after that in the hopes it would alleviate both Haurchefant's worry and focus. As much as he appreciated the man's assistance and care, it wasn't something Haurchefant needed to be paying attention to, let alone anything he could fix.
If it could have been fixed, he would have done so a long time ago. He hated struggling to eat.
Someone still noticed, though, because barely two days later, Alphinaud offered him a bundle of food as they made their way through Ishgard. He slowed to a stop, blinking first at the small bundle before looking to Alphinaud for an explanation. He knew it was food - the fabric covering it did nothing to keep the scents within - but for a moment he didn't quite understand why Alphinaud was suddenly gifting him some.
"I may not always be the most observant fellow around but I did not need Haurchefant telling me for me to notice that you were eating far too little as of late." Alphinaud was not meeting his gaze but that was fine. He took the food if for nothing more than to allow Alphinaud to lower his arm. "It is reasonable to assume that past events have curbed your appetite but still you should find time to consume more between meals to maintain your strength. It would not do us any good if the Warrior of Light collapses on the battlefield at the peak of any given confrontation."
Gods he hated that moniker.
He was well aware but telling Alphinaud as much felt like a lost cause. He tucked the bundle of food against his stomach, his hands around it as if he could hide it from the world like he would an injured kitten or the like.
Be it nerves or some other reason, Alphinaud kept talking in wake of his lack of response. "I would note that I am aware that you regularly do not eat a full serving at times, though I will admit that I am at a loss as to the reasons behind such instances. While I am grateful that we have not suffered such as we did in Ul'dah before, there have been similar enough moments in the past that these moments of diminished consumption did not follow. I had not thought them to be concerning until now." Alphinaud's gaze finally landed on him and he couldn't bring his gaze back up to meet it. "Tell me, my friend; is this naught but another of those moments?" He could see Alphinaud's chest expand with a breath before the other continued, "Or is it such to be concerned about now?"
He swallowed thickly. Oh how he wanted to take the easy way out, to just lie and say that it was nothing to worry about, but Alphinaud was right. Not eating not only risked his wellbeing but the wellbeing of others with how often he found himself on the proverbial frontlines and having someone else who knew the challenges he faced when it came to eating meant an ally against such things, like Cecille had been back home.
But the thought of telling Alphinaud - of admitting it out loud to anyone - what the problem truly was felt more daunting than being told he was being accused of regicide. It was an idiotic thought to compare the two, he knew that, but the feeling of the words stuck in his throat screamed in a way that they had not in the other moment. He had been so numb when they had accused him of Nanamo's death, when they had forced him and the other Scions to flee for their lives only to get separated and lost in the events that followed. He worked his jaw as if it would be enough to get the words out and flowing freely over his tongue, forcibly dragging himself away from those memories. All he had to do was say a few words to Alphinaud. That was it. He wasn't going up against some god-equivalent entity wielding magics he had never seen before and barely survived through so there was no reason for the lead tongue in his mouth.
He tried to swallow again but his mouth was tacky, lacking anything else to swallow.
"I…ah," he managed, only for the rest of the words to remain thick in his throat. Be it Alphinaud's patience or the other's ability to perceive the struggle he was going through to say anything, Alphinaud didn't say a word. He simply stood there in front of him, patiently waiting for him to share what words he would manage. "Eating is…a struggle, at times. It, nnn." He could do it. Just a few more words. He could manage that. "It's…a texture thing. Taste thing, sometimes. If things don't, don't chew right or the texture is off, it can kill my appetite. So can a new flavor or too much of one." The momentum he had gained suddenly screeched to a halt as his gaze fell to the food in his hands. "My, ah." Swallowing wasn't working; he really needed to stop trying. "It-" He sucked in a breath, forcing what he could of the shame away. "There's no logic to it - I know that - but I-" the breath shuddered in his chest as he found himself suddenly unwilling to admit it all so he quickly gave what of the truth he was willing to admit- "ever since I watched her die, anytime I go to eat anything, every thought in my head is how it's poisoned." If there was any reaction from Alphinaud, he missed it. "I'm very aware of how it's all in my head. Not everything can be poisoned but it-" He clenched his teeth. He couldn't lose momentum now. "After even just a few bites, I can't…forcing anything more down would risk being sick."
He barely felt Alphinaud's hand on his arm through the thick coat he was wearing but he saw the movement along the edge of his vision. He let his gaze fall to the back of Alphinaud's hand as Alphinaud offered, "I am so sorry, Echo'a. I should have-" Alphinaud cut himself off. He wouldn't have been surprised had the next words been anything remotely close to 'asked sooner'. Maybe Alphinaud had realized the futility of his statement because he amended it with, "Would it aid you if I tasted it first? Shown you that it was not indeed poisoned?"
He shook his head, immediately hating the idea. "Please don't." He finally managed to get his gaze on Alphinaud's face; the concern there hurt in a way he didn't want to think about. "That would-" make it worse. "It'll be fine," he said instead.
"Then what ought I do? Surely there must be something I can do to ease the burden you are suffering under."
He shrugged, not wanting to outright deny Alphinaud's hope that there was something he could do. Unfortunately, the motion had moved his arm under Alphinaud's touch and, though he couldn't be sure, he suspected Alphinaud had taken the motion as him shrugging the other's hand off. With it gone, he suddenly felt like the ground would lose its hold on his feet and he would drift skyward. "Talk at me?" he abruptly suggested, his sudden desperation rushing the words. "Distract me from-" everything- "what I'm doing, that I'm eating. In theory, that should be enough." At least, it had been with Haurchefant and the times before. It wasn't foolproof, not by a long shot, but it meant he ate something and that was better than not eating anything at all.
The grin Alphinaud gave him seemed somehow too bright, as if Alphinaud was forcing it bigger. Still, though, Alphinaud took the suggestion and ran hard with it, making sure to keep him engaged so that it truly was a distraction.
He wasn't sure who all Alphinaud told - and what all he had shared - but any meal he had was always with someone else present, be it eating with him or utilizing the space in some manner, chatting with him about a wide array of topics but never drawing attention to his appetite, or lack thereof. The consensus also seemed to include making sure he always had something to eat between meals. Haurchefant and Alphinaud were quite quick at making sure something edible was in his hands at the start of any meeting with Aymeric or any other opportunity that could be used as a distraction. It was lucky that he found the treatment amusing and touching because he was very aware of how annoying he could find it if it had truly bothered him.
Despite their attempts, there were a few times when the distraction wasn't quite enough. The worst one had been during a meeting with Aymeric. He had taken a bite, the churning thoughts of him eating poison - Nanamo was alive and well, the poisoning nothing more than a plot manipulated before it could truly take her life so there should be no reason for him to still be plagued by such thoughts - rivaling Aymeric and the other's discussion to the point that when he bit down on something that wasn't the same texture as everything else, he gagged. With as much discretion as he could manage in his haste, he discarded the mouthful into the fabric that had been wrapped around the food. His cheeks started to burn as frustrated tears threatened to fill his eyes. He gritted his teeth, refusing to let the ridiculous emotion show in such company. Yes, he had been hungry and yes, he was frustrated that he couldn't finish the food, but what was done was done; he now had no appetite to even try and stomach what was left. The roaring in his head certainly wouldn't let him try again for quite a while and putting it away now that he had used the fabric as a napkin-
Alphinaud's hand wrapped securely around his wrist and left him little time to stop the other should he so choose to do so. He didn't, though. He simply watched as Alphinaud brought the food to his own lips and took a bite, one that was a touch too big. Alphinaud had to quickly swipe his other thumb against his lips to keep it from dribbling down his chin. Had he not been caught in the torrent in his head, he would have chuckled at that. Instead, he watched as Alphinaud enjoyed the bite and swallowed all of it, contributing to the conversation as if nothing had transpired between them. He gave himself half a minute before he forced his hand to bring the food back to his lips.
The torrent in his head had quieted enough that he was able to finish the rest of the much wanted food though his appetite never truly returned.
"If I am stepping beyond my bounds, my friend, please tell me," Aymeric said as he came to a stop before Aymeric's desk. "I couldn't help but notice the interaction between you and Alphinaud. Had I not seen the expression on your face, I would have thought Alphinaud had simply wanted to steal a bite of food. Is everything alright?"
He had wondered at the request for him to linger after the meeting. "For what it is, yes."
Aymeric's concerned frown only deepened. "Is there anything I can do to assist? It had not passed my notice nor the notice of others that both Alphinaud and Lord Haurchefant have maintained a constant supply of food for you to consume. If making sure there is something for you to eat during our meetings would suffice, that can be readily arranged."
An odd sort of amused fondness tugged at the corner of his lips, loosening some of the tension in his chest. "I appreciate the thought but it would only cause you more grief if my fleeting appetite did not agree with what you proffer."
Something about his statement somehow eased some of Aymeric's tension. "Is bread often safe, then? Most of what you are handed consists of bread to some extent."
His left ear perked up at that, surprised. "You really don't have to provide anything, Aymeric," he offered, though he wasn't sure if it was reflex or something else entirely as he gave the other the out. "It hardly seems fair to burden you as well with my insignificant troubles. Truly, the thought is enough."
Aymeric's gentle smile fell a bit at that. "After everything you have done for us so far and what more you will accomplish, if I am able to alleviate some of your troubles - insignificant or otherwise - then I wish to do so. And gladly. You have earned far more than that from the people of Ishgard and myself."
He gave a shallow bow, a hand pressed hard against his chest to keep himself as calm as he could. "If that is your wish." He straightened and met Aymeric's gaze again. "Thank you. And yes; simple breads are usually safest."
If there wasn't a basket of bread on the table any time there was a meeting, a basket would appear at some point. He never did learn if the four of them - Alphinaud, Haurchefant, Aymeric, and Lucia - had coordinated to eat some of the bread themselves but it certainly eased some of worry about eating during the meetings.
Well, for a brief moment it was the four of them.
Night settled around them, a gentle blanket of darkness draped at the boundaries of firelight as their voices filled that small space. The conversation was pleasant, much to Echo'a's mild surprise and relief. He had fully expected some sort of clash between Ysayle and Estinien but the pair were remaining civil with each other and, if Echo'a allowed himself to hope, actually enjoying each other's company as well.
The food…well, the bite he had managed hadn't necessarily been bad but it had bolstered the noise in his head, stealing the last vestige of any appetite he had left. Instead, he threw himself into conversation, hoping that his talking would be enough to distract from his lack of eating.
Estinien nudged his knee with a firm fist as the Dragoon moved to get more. "Don't forget to eat in among all your yapping."
That hope immediately evaporated at the reminder of just who he was eating with. While it was possible Ysayle would not have brought attention to it - or noticed - he should have expected that Estinien would. The man was perceptive and now that it had been voiced, he knew he had Alphinaud's attention as well. His frustration was easy to hide as he rolled his eyes in good humor. "Yeah, yeah. I know."
But when he still hadn't touch his bowl by the time Estinien had finished, Estinien brought it to everyone's attention with a sharp, exasperated, "Enough talking." Estinien picked up the still full bowl and pushed it into Echo'a's hands. "If you do not eat it now, it will be stone cold."
He was fairly certain it already was. Pulling the fond smile into place had been far too easy with how cornered he felt with everyone watching him. "While I appreciate the concern, I'm just not hungry."
Estinien didn't buy it if the thinning of his lips was anything to go by. Ysayle spoke up before the Dragoon could, asking, "Was something wrong with it?"
He was quick to shake his head, turning a more genuine smile to her. "No, I'm simply not hungry at this moment." He passed the bowl back to Estinien seeing as the other was closest. "I apologize for wasting the food, though. I should have said something." A lie too close to his shame and his mask faltered. He stood, stepping away from the conversation before his mask could truly break. "I'm going to check the camp's perimeter. If you'll excuse me."
He picked up his firearm from where it had been resting on the ground behind him and returned it to his back as he made for the very limits of the fire light.
He walked that invisible boundary slowly, letting the brisk night breeze brush over him as a comforting gesture. Twelve, he was not looking forward to returning to camp. Maybe he could just stay on the perimeter and only return once everyone was asleep.
The likelihood of outlasting any of his companions was laughable.
In the end, the decision was taken out of his hands when the sound of boots on grass and the softest breath of metal on metal warned him that Estinien was approaching the rock he had perched himself on.
"Here," accompanied Estinien giving him a rather familiar bundle. "Alphinaud was rather insistent that I bring this to you."
He turned his attention back to the floating isles. "You can have it. I was serious when I said I wasn't hungry."
"This is food?"
He could hear the frown on those disbelieving words. "A small bread loaf and usually nuts or a hard cheese," he confirmed. His head listed to the side, the sound of the bundle being undone underlying his words as he added, "Might have crackers. He tries to keep it somewhat varied but nuts and cheeses can be hit or miss. That being said, I have two other similar bundles currently in my bag for when I do get hungry."
"Safe foods."
There was no point in looking, he wouldn't be able to see Estinien's expression because of the helmet even if he did, but that statement had held so much in it that his confusion had him looking anyway. Estinien was taller than him just in general but perched on that rock with Estinien less than a fulm behind him, he found he could see under the visor for the first time. He met surprisingly soft storm colored eyes that were watching him and found the expression with that gaze to be almost regretful. Estinien lifted the opened bundle in emphasis as Estinien clarified, "These are things you can normally eat when other foods are not to your liking."
He wasn't able to keep his distaste at Estinien's choice of words off of his face and he quickly looked away to hide it, casting his words as nonchalant as he could. "It isn't a matter of 'to my liking' or not so much as it is simply becoming unable to eat for any number of reasons."
Estinien's hand was heavy when it settled on his shoulder and he curled forward slightly to hide the fact that it had made him jump. "It was not my intention to offend," Estinien spoke, his voice even and low, gentler than any time before. "You are not the first I have come to know who has had such challenges with eating and I am well aware of how little choice you have in the matter at times, of how pushing through can and will make you physically ill."
He shouldn't look - his expression surely showed how much he was struggling now that the topic had been breached - but Estinien's words sounded so genuine in their kindness that he couldn't keep himself from seeking out those storm colored eyes once more. Estinien's expression did not change but he thought some sort of tension eased from the other's stance.
"Mind, before I continue: you do not breathe a word of what follows to anyone."
He frowned. "Then why tell me at all?"
"Because it will make amends for my earlier actions, if for nothing more than assuring you one of your allies understands."
He wasn't sure if that meant Estinien was talking about himself or another; not that it mattered. "Alright, then. Whatever you share will not leave this rock."
There was a ghost of a smile on Estinien's lips before the Dragoon removed his hand from Echo'a's shoulder. "When I first witnessed such challenges, it was well before I became the Azure Dragoon. It was not something I would have normally noticed for even then most of my focus was becoming stronger so as to enact my revenge on Nidhogg, yet it was hard not to. By that point we had all been well and trained to eat what we were given as it was possible the next meal would be half a day away if not longer and for whatever reason, he always sat beside me for meals, which lent to my catching him picking through the food, working around portions that he would desperately regret going without." Estinien crossed his arms, the frown pulling at his face heavy in both annoyance and regret. "I had believed that he was being needlessly picky, presuming noble breeding was to blame, and so I drew attention to it every chance I got as I was not having a half starved man watch my back. With my attention came the rest of our unit's and every meal became a mental battle for someone who was already struggling enough."
Estinien shook his head, a slow, disappointed gesture, armor barely sighing as he readjusted his stance. "Our unit was responding to a dragon sighting, nothing unusual in and of itself yet we had not expected the monstrosity that came for us in turn." Something dark passed over Estinien's expression and Echo'a quickly averted his gaze, giving the other some semblance of privacy in that brief moment. "We were the only two to survive, and while I stubbornly went after the wounded beast who had taken the life of our unit, he followed after ever keeping an eye on me. Had he not, I would have died out there that day. Instead, his aid guaranteed the dragon's death and my survival and we thought - foolishly - that would be the last of our struggles."
His gaze came back up, seeking out Estinien's, though the man had shifted too much for him to make out the other's eyes. "Were you set upon by more dragons?"
Estinien snorted a laugh. "Nay, had that been all, I would have continued believing my poorly placed assumptions of noble breeding leading to pickiness. No, more simply, inexperience breeds mistakes and while we trekked familiar paths back towards civilization, the lands were constantly changing with the shift of snow and ice and a path that is safe one day becomes deadly the next for it. We had barely had the bridge within sight when the snow gave out underfoot and my attempt to keep him from disappearing into the unknown depths below resulted in both of us tumbling down. I sustained little more than bruising and a sprained ankle while his arm and leg were both broken. Not terribly, not life threatening, but he was not going to be able to travel on his own and my ankle was too tender to support his weight safely. We were lucky as the crevice we fell into had not been terribly deep and had an exit into the ravine that cut beneath the bridge but that was the extent of our luck. The only choice we had was to hunker down where we were long enough for my ankle to heal to get us both home."
Estinien huffed a laugh. "Even with a head injury he was hiding from me, he walked me through splinting and stabilizing his broken arm and leg."
Silence briefly settled between them. He couldn't help but wonder how far into the memory Estinien was finding himself with retelling it as he set his gaze back onto the floating isles.
Estinien pulled in a slow breath, letting it out with somber words. "Since he was in no condition to fend for himself, food and warmth were left for me to maintain. Warmth was easy enough - the crevice shielded us from the bitter winds and once I had a fire going, it retained the warmth equally so - but food was a bit more of a challenge. While there was certainly enough game to pick from, my choices were limited by my ankle. It took quarter of a day before I managed to snag us anything. The meat was tough, gamey, but it was better than nothing, or so I had believed." The breath of metal on metal accented a brief pause. "Aymeric had tried to decline the food, saying that he wasn't hungry, but I would not budge on the matter."
Echo'a's ears and tail straightened at the name, surprise coursing through him. While Estinien had said it was of one of his allies, when a name hadn't been given forthright he had accepted that he would not learn the specific ally in question. For it to be Aymeric made the act of asking after what foods to provide Echo'a make all that more sense, as did the man's change in expression during such exchange.
Estinien's words did not pause for his epiphany. "I threatened to force him if he did not consume what I gave him, ignoring his counter of nausea and a lack of appetite making that nigh impossible as if they were simply excuses rather than the warnings they were." The pause was abrupt, but brief, almost as if something had caught Estinien by surprise but Echo'a didn't glance back. Estinien was unmoving behind him and the words continued without preamble, reassurances that whatever it had been had not been external. "I watched him take the first piece in his mouth, his expression of contempt and resignation made of stone up until he had to swallow. It was a brief instance of wavered control but as he took the next bite into his mouth, his expression had returned to that of stone.
"He swallowed that bite far quicker than the first but as soon as the third passed his lips, his resolve broke. Already pale from pain and cold, what color remained immediately faded from his face but he smacked a hand to his mouth and tried to force that bite down as well only to turn to the side and empty his stomach." Echo'a flinched in sympathy, ears briefly pinning themselves flat. Estinien hummed behind him in agreement. "At the time, I had been furious, believing he had done so on purpose, but when he failed to respond to me as he had been, that fury started being smothered by concern."
Something fond filled Estinien's words, though he wasn't quite sure if it was pride or something else. It was wistful, whatever it was, and barely lasted. "I think very few truly understand how stubborn Aymeric can be when he puts his mind to something, and I unfortunately had goaded him enough that he tried to eat more, though his body was having none of it. He might not have been sick a second time but his entire expression twisted in disgust and frustration before he spat the meat out." Estinien sighed heavily behind him, the soft shifting of metal telling him the Dragoon had adjusted his stance again, maybe even going as far as crossing his arms. "His point made, I intervened, only to discover the head injury he had suffered by placing my hand directly onto the wound." Echo'a sucked in a breath through his teeth, already knowing where that was going. "Aye, he had not taken too kindly to that but the retort he spat at me slurred horribly, his capacity to hide it long gone in the wake of everything. I told him off for the retort out of reflex before I set about tending to his head wound. Unaccustomed with such head injuries that were not so apparent in their life threatening, I did what I could, icing the location and urging him to sleep.
"It was unfortunately fitful, as the injury was causing nausea - as was hunger, he later informed me - and, while he could sleep through pain or noise or the like, nausea was the one thing he could not. By a bit of trial and error, I eventually figured out how to brew some tea to at least get fluids in him and I passed the next two days ever vigilant of his condition."
He frowned up at Estinien. "The head injury wasn't better by the next day?"
"Oh, I'm sure that was far better come the next bell but it was the fever that set in that was the real challenge." Echo'a's eyes widened and Estinien gave a brisk nod. "Even with the care we took of his injuries, his body took none too kindly to the whole ordeal and deemed it fit to throw him into the clutches of a nasty fever. With it came a continued loss of appetite and greater bouts of nausea. There came a point where I feared that he would die of dehydration before succumbing to anything else when even a few drops of clean water on his tongue made him sick. While neither of us were strangers to illnesses reeking such havoc, having to personally deal with it was another matter entirely.
"It was within brief moments of lucid thoughts that we talked. At first, he predominantly filled the air with talk of his family, his hopes and dreams, greatest fears; but when he grew too tired or found words difficult, he would coax me to talk of myself, gently pulling out information one fact at a time of the same things. During one such lucid conversation during the worst of the sickness, I asked none too kindly after his inability to eat. Reluctant as he was to share, he spoke of it with ease, passing it off as a simple thing even as I struggled to comprehend such challenges were even possible. Textures are his greatest challenge, which lends to his avoidance of meats which often have the textures that immediately negate any appetite he may have. Despite not understanding it, I did strive to try and find a way to get some form of food within him. A basic stew seemed to be enough and if the meat was culled small enough, he could eat it just fine. He bounced back within a day and I carried him back to Falcon's Nest the day after with barely an ache left in my ankle."
"Did you two part ways after that?" Echo'a couldn't help but ask, only to belatedly remember Aymeric's introduction of the Dragoon. He quickly amended, albeit with uncertainty, "He had introduced you as a close friend so I'm assuming not."
Estinien huffed a laugh, lips quirked into a crooked smirk. "In some ways we did; but that kind of shared experience isn't easily forgotten. Whether by design or our own desires, that bond remained, solidifying against time and outside influence and tying us together for a long time thereafter." Estinien waved a hand dismissively, adding, "It's quite the shame he's caught so tightly by Ishgard. It would do him good to have more than myself and the scarce few others he recognizes as such, not to mention seeing what lay beyond Ishgard's walls."
Echo'a chuckled, feeling oddly humbled with that last comment. After everything, to be told such thoughts seemed more than an addition to the tale, like it was a secret Estinien believed him worthy of hearing. "Well," he offered in turn, letting his gaze return to the floating isles, "perhaps should this work and your war ends, he'll be able to."
Estinien hummed behind him and silence settled over them. After a while, the soft sound of metal on metal led Estinien's words. "Come on. If you don't return with me, I will not hear the end of it from Alphinaud."
"You can go up against the nastiest of dragons but one young elezen has you shoving others in the line of fire?" Echo'a asked in a tease, hopping from his perch and starting for camp.
Estinien's hand clamped around the back of his neck. The grip, though firm and secure, was careful in its strength, pressing more as a request than a demand of compliance. Had he not wanted to, Echo'a could have stood fast against that pressure but he bent nearly in half while still walking, laughter spilling from his tongue to underline Estinien's curt words. "As if I need protection from the little Lord. I simply refuse to listen to his mewling when the solution is within hand."
Literally, as while the pressure on the back of his neck softened, Estinien's hand remained resting loosely against the back of his neck as he straightened. Still amused, Echo'a grinned at the other and happily commented conspiratorially, "But Estinien. Imagine the headlines should anyone else find out: famous Azure Dragoon, brought low by the mewlings of a youth, forced to rely on fellow Azure Dragoon to quiet mewling."
This time Estinien shoved him forward, giving him only a brief glimpse of an amused smirk before he was stumbling into the tiny camp, giggling. Alphinaud, sure enough, was waiting and hurried over to steady him. Chatter briefly filled the air and once Alphinaud was placated, they settled in for the night. To Echo'a's surprise, Estinien settled close behind him and he draped his tail over the other's shin as he curled around Alphinaud, grateful that the rocky start between them seemed to be smoothed.
Another ally in his corner.
Another he could rely on.