Happy 1 year anniversary to this fic! Anyways, there's some sexual humor in this chapter. Fair warning!
Disclaimer: I don't own Pokémon.
Piplup POV:
It was another beautiful, warm day outside. The sky was clear, the sun was shining brightly, and the aroma of saltwater flowed through the light, crisp breeze. I was sitting underneath a big tree, cloaked in soothingly cool shade.
Dawn was still refusing to let me battle after my fainting episode, leaving me to do whatever I liked while everyone else trained; and that was fine by me. I had woken up early and snuck away to try out the motions Articuno had shown me, and boy was it exhausting work. Even though I seemed to have the move and motions correct, I still wondered; was my Steel Wing actually strong enough to redirect electricity?
Well, I had a feeling I would find out soon enough.
"Hey, Pip-butt!" I heard Oshawott yell, snapping me out of my thoughts. I looked and saw Oshawott walking my way, flanked by Pikachu and Buneary.
'They must be done training' I thought and made a mental note for him to find a better nickname for me. Sooner or later, Buneary was going to make a comment about 'Pip-butt'.
The three of them stopped in front of me, under the shade of the tree as well. Buneary grinned and snickered, and I gulped; I knew this grin all too well. "Pip-butt" she said, barely controlling her laughter. "That sounds accurate, especially for Oshawott!" She began laughing hysterically while I felt my face turn bright red at the implication.
"Buneary!" I exclaimed. "Stop being such a pervert!" She kept laughing loudly while I covered my face with my flippers. Ugh, I did NOT like this side of her!
"Whatcha guys laughing about?" I heard someone say behind me. I turned to see Emolga standing there looking curiously at us, her arms crossed. Snivy was also there, a bit behind the flying rodent.
The three Pokémon behind me fell silent. I figured they were afraid of Emolga finding out about me and Oshawott. I, however, had no such fear, at least not since this morning.
Then I had a brilliant thought; I could get back at Buneary for thay stupid joke! After all, I did have the suspicion…
"We were talking about unwanted pregnancies" I stated, chuckling to myself. This would teach her to mess with me! "And how-"
"How we were sure Pachirisu had one when we were traveling together!" Pikachu interrupted as he walked to my side. I caught his glare out of the corner of my eye. He must have figured out where this was going, and clearly he was not amused.
"So, something Snivy would never have to worry about, since no boys will ever like her" Emolga stated plainly. I saw Snivy scowl behind her at the insult. "Well, in my pack, we used leaves to prevent that from happening." Huh? I couldn't tell if she was serious or not.
"Really? Leaves?" I questioned. "That doesn't sound very safe."
"Or hygienic" Pikachu chimed in.
"Or reliable" Buneary added. I shivered at the mental image of an old, moldy leaf going in-
"And that's why mistakes like her happen" Snivy added. I couldn't help but snicker at this, Snivy got her good! Emolga whipped around to face her. Emolga's back was to me now, so I could only imagine the angry look on her face.
"What did you say, filth?!" Emolga growled, anger dripping from every word. Snivy grinned and turned her head up and away in a look of indifference.
"The truth" Snivy calmly replied. Emolga growled and launched herself at Snivy, who gracefully stepped out of the way at the last moment and took off towards the villa. Emolga quickly began chasing her, firing random Discharge attacks at the snake-like Pokémon.
"You're going to pay for that!" Emolga yelled as she flew away in pursuit. They both ran/flew away, leaving the four of us alone. I turned around to face the others.
"That could have been bad" Pikachu said.
"Yeah, that was close" Buneary confirmed. They both let out a long sigh of relief. Oshawott, however, looked curious.
"Okay, I got to know. What happened with Pachirisu?" Oshawott asked. I groaned; I did NOT want to recall that particular memory.
"I'm not telling the story, someone else do it!" I exclaimed, shuttering at the memory. It was literally painful, not to mention disgusting!
"Fine, I'll do it" Pikachu said, and I let out a sigh of relief. At least it wouldn't be me telling it. "Back in Sinnoh, one of Ash's Pokémon was a Buizel." Pikachu paused. "Actually, he used to belong to Dawn before she traded him to Ash for his Aipom, since Buizel liked battling and Aipom liked contests. Pikachu paused and shook his head. "Anyways, he and Pachirisu always had a thing for each other. During one of our trips, Pachirisu went into heat, and they, um, did, well-"
"They screwed each other" I finished bitterly. "Every. Single. Fricking. Night." I sighed angrily. That may have been a crude choice of words, but so were they, after all! "They were so loud, too! It was like I was hearing porn. Actually, I WAS hearing porn! How none of our trainers woke up, I'll never understand!"
"He's just mad because of what happened the last time" Buneary said, and I growled. Of course she would bring that up.
"What happened?" Oshawott asked. I sighed again. I might as well tell him.
"Well, as Piplup so elegantly put it, they were 'screwing each other' again one night" Pikachu started, before I could speak. "When Pachirisu, um, 'finished', she-"
"She hit me with her Discharge" I concluded. I swear I could still feel the sting of it! I noticed Oshawott was blushing and looking down at the ground as he spoke.
"Um, Piplup, just how close were you?"
I felt my eyes widen as my entire face felt like it was on fire. I couldn't believe he just said that! Pikachu's jaw dropped and a massive blush appeared on his face. Buneary laughed so hard she fell to the ground, kicking her legs up in the air and clutching her stomach.
"The move Discharge!" I corrected, completely mortified. "I was thirty feet away!" I shook my head and ignored the still-laughing rabbit rolling around on the ground. "Anyways, that was when I finally snapped. I got up, went over to the intertwined duo, and gave it to them good."
My eyes widened as I realized how that sounded. I slapped a flipper over my beak; that did NOT come out right!
Buneary, who had finally stopped laughing and stood up, once again fell over in laughter as she clutched her stomach. "Stop, please!" she squeaked out. "You're gonna make me pee myself!"
"Nonono, I meant I berated them!" I exclaimed. "You guys are ALL a bunch of perverts!" I turned around and stomped away angrily.
This was all so embarrassing; I needed some time alone to calm myself!
/
Like it? Constructive criticism? Have any suggestions for future chapters? Leave a review please!