I do not own Harry Potter, the Wizarding World, or any canon characters.

Extended Family

Chapter 143 – Baconeering

Takes place after chapter 22.

"Harry, you'd tell me if you killed someone and cut them up into tiny pieces, right?"

Harry looked at Katie with a deeply confused expression. "Uhm, what?"

Katie giggled. "I just saw a bunch of little neatly wrapped packages in the ice box and got concerned and wanted to double-check with you."

"First, why would you think I'd kill someone and cut them into tiny pieces," Harry asked, smiling. "Second, do you really think I'd put the pieces in the ice box with our food? Third, why did you immediately go towards 'murdered chopped up person' when you saw the packages?"

"You probably would have a good reason," Katie replied with utter faith. "No, actually, you're right, that's silly of me to think you'd do that. You take food very seriously and don't cross-contaminate." Her smile grew at his laugh. "And blame Lyla. She's been getting into Muggle crime fiction novels and I've been reading some with her."

"Are they any good?" Harry asked.

"Yeah! Also makes me glad I know magic so I can defend myself. So if it's not a body in tiny pieces, what are all the packages?"

"Different kinds of bacon. Hedwig and I got them from Linette to try all sorts of different ones."

"Oooh, are they good?"

"Some are super good! Some weren't as good and a few weren't to our liking at all really but I'll still eat them in a sandwich. Hedwig still prefers streaky and back bacon but she also really likes pancetta. Oh actually, let me make a dish for us with this other one, the guanciale."

Harry diced the guanciale up into small pieces and cooked it slowly in a pan to render out a lot of the fat. He boiled noodles and beat some eggs together with pepper and salt and parmesan cheese. When everything was ready, he put the cooked noodles into the pan and added the egg and cheese mixture and stirred it vigorously off the heat. The resultant mixing with the gentle heat remaining from the noodles turned the eggs and cheese into a very creamy sauce and the rich, chewy, fatty guanciale added a delicious meatiness to the dish.

"Carbonara," Harry said with a flourish, serving a big bowl of it to Katie.

"Oh my gosh that's amazing," Katie said, eating hungrily. "Thanks! Mmm, what kind of bacon is this?"

"Guanciale. It's the jowl, or cheeks. Very different from the usual pork belly bacon," Harry said, also eating.

"Hedwig doesn't like it?"

"Not to just chomp on. Which I also have to agree with her. It's great in a dish like this though." He smiled when the window to the flat opened and Hedwig swooped in. He dished up some of the carbonara and set it on the counter and Hedwig landed. She barked a greeting and nuzzled them before she joined them in eating.

"Yeah that's fair. Wouldn't like this in a breakfast normally either I don't think." Katie continued to eat. "What other kinds did you not like?"

"The peameal bacon was super weird. It's like ham rolled in cornmeal," Harry said. "I like Canadian bacon, but it's not very much like streaky bacon either, and it's a bit different from regular bacon too. Hedwig wasn't a fan," he added when Hedwig mooned the icebox. "She really hated the turkey bacon."

"Just like Dora," Katie smiled, giggling at the face Hedwig made.

"I mean, turkey bacon is tasty, it's just not bacon," Harry smiled.

"Maybe you two should try to make your own," she suggested. She smiled at Hedwig's loud gasp. "You can totally make your own bacon! Dad and my uncle used to do it every now and then. It takes some time but you can do it and it tastes pretty good."

"We'll go to Linette's after we finish eating," Harry laughed when Hedwig flew to his head and tugged on his hair energetically. He smiled when she flapped back down and started eating her carbonara once more only more swiftly. "No need to rush and give yourself indigestion."

Katie giggled when Hedwig rolled her eyes at Harry as well as rolling her rump at him. "Probably shouldn't make her wait too long though."

-0-

"You want what?!" Linette gasped theatrically, holding one hand to her head. "You don't want my bacon anymore? Oh what am I to do?! My best customer, forsaken me!" She laughed when Hedwig fluttered over the counter and landed on her shoulder and nuzzled her reassuringly. "Aww, thank you my sweet. I knew you wouldn't abandon me."

"You're the one that wants to do it the most!" Harry cried and Katie and the others at the market and the butcher stall laughed merrily.

"Oh no, I don't believe that, he's putting you up to it so I don't blame him, is that right?" Linette asked.

Hedwig tilted her head and thought for a moment before shaking her head and barking some.

"At least she's an honest bacon-obsessed owl," Harry grinned.

"It's good to be passionate," Linette chuckled. "And it just so happens I have some lovely pork belly and a nice cut of the loin and the belly so you can do both regular and streaky." She laughed when Hedwig cooed lovingly and nuzzled her more. "Come with me, we can pick out the best of the lot for you."

"Wow, Linette doesn't treat anyone else like that," one of her employees laughed. "The other day, someone complained about a cut of beef and she filled a sack of scraps and threw it at him."

"Hedwig can either make people adore her or fight her," Harry said. "And Hedwig knows who belongs in which category."

"Really? She's so adorable though. Who would want to fight her?" the other person gasped.

Harry and Katie laughed knowingly. "Hedwig can be a bit belligerent," Harry said. "And can really keep after you. Carries a grudge too."

Linette returned with two large wrapped packages that she handed over the counter to Harry. "There you go! One pork belly and one loin cut with a part of the belly attached. Just what you need for both kinds of bacon." She pointed to a few stalls down. "You'll want a bit of curing salt for the belly. Make sure you get some from the spices place."

"Thanks Linette. Throw in some bacon of both kinds too, in case we mess up or she can't wait," Harry grinned.

"Already had her pick out the best of that too," Linette laughed, handing over two more smaller wrapped packages.

"You're so spoiled," Harry smiled when Hedwig hopped daintily from Linette's shoulder and onto the counter before cheeping at Harry to hold his arm out for her to walk up. She nestled on his head and tugged his hair some, looking plump and pleased.

"She deserves it," Linette smiled. "And bring me some when you're finished!"

Harry and Katie and Hedwig promised her they would and they walked down to the spice stall together. After consulting with the owner, they bought an array of spices with a heaping amount of regular salt and curing salt returned to their flat.

"Good thing we already had these curing containers," Harry said, digging through his cabinet and taking them out. "Makes it handy."

"Oh we need to get stuff for smoking," Katie said. "For the streaky bacon."

"Oh right. Well it's going to cure a little first before we get to the smoking part so we'll have time," Harry said. He washed his hands. "Let's get things ready, shall we?" They found a simple recipe for a cure for both kinds of bacon in one of Harry's cookbooks and Katie measured out the spices and mixed them well in bowls while Harry cleaned and trimmed both cuts of meat. Hedwig watched from the counter top, fetching a bowl or something when Katie asked her too before retuning to watch critically.

"Brown sugar, salt, curing salt, and a little pepper for the back bacon," Harry said, rubbing the dry cure into the loin cut. After making sure it was completely rubbed in and covered by the cure, he set it in the curing container. "Salt, curing salt, pepper, and sugar for the streaky bacon," he said and did the same thing to the piece of pork belly. He also put that into a curing container and put both in the cool box.

"There. Now every few days we take it out, wipe it dry and pour out the accumulated liquid, and do that until seven days are up. Then we can smoke the streaky bacon for a few hours and cook and eat both." He smiled as Hedwig hopped up and down excitedly, hooting with glee.

"What is curing salt?" Katie asked, looking at the package.

"It has nitrites in it to help preserve the meat against bacteria and it gives it the pinkish color. It also tastes a little differently too. Now all we have to do is wait." He blinked at Hedwig who looked at him expectantly. "What? We need to wait for it to cure. Unless there's a spell that speeds up the curing process which I actually want to look up because that would be interesting."

"I think she wants some of that bacon," Katie smiled, pointing at the last two packages on the counter top. "And to be honest, so do I."

"Then I guess we need to make some," Harry laughed as Hedwig flew to Katie and both gave Harry wide-eyed looks of want and adoration. "Don't do that! You know I can resist that!"

"You know," Katie said, her voice low and silky. "I've been thinking about a new broom…hey! Get back here! Get him Hedwig!"

Harry fled from them, laughing as he ran around the flat. "The more you chase me, the longer it takes for me to cook the bacon!"

-0-

"Why is Hedwig nibbling on wood?" Katie asked. She had gotten home and had changed into more comfortable clothing before joining Harry and Hedwig in the sitting room.

"We're deciding on what we want to smoke the streaky bacon in," Harry said. "Apparently the best kinds are hickory, apple, or maple. So I got a stick of each for Hedwig to nibble on and then we'll get the pellets to fill the smoker with."

Hedwig nibbled on each one thoughtfully, giving each stick due consideration. She finally decided on one, putting her decision in Harry's hand.

"Hickory then?" Harry held the hickory twig. "It's the most traditional for streaky bacon I think."

"Sounds good to me," Katie said eagerly. "And we can always try the others in the future. I'm assuming this isn't a one-time thing."

"Probably not," Harry smiled. He had carefully taken the bacon out to wipe clean and to clean the containers of any liquid before putting them back. Now it had been seven days and they were ready for the next step. He left and returned with a bag of hickory pellets and he laid them out at the bottom of a metallic smoker he had transfigured out of metal sheeting. With a Smoldering Charm, he lit the wood pellets and then laid the pork belly on top of the grate within the smoker before sealing it with a lid. They put the smoker on the balcony and the pleasing scent of hickory smoke filled the air.

"I have to admit, this has been fun," Katie smiled.

"How did Dad and your uncle do it before?" Harry asked.

"About the same. We have that small outdoor grill thing we can put in our back yard. It's been a while though but when I told Dad about what we're doing, he started talking about doing it again."

"Oh Hedwig, you might not want to sit on the smoker," Harry laughed, seeing Hedwig sitting on the top of it. "You might smoke your feathers."

Hedwig flapped off and landed on his head and hooted happily, sounding eager and hungry.

"Not too much longer," Harry said, rubbing her belly. "After a few hours, we can cook them up and try them with the back bacon!"

"How do we want to eat them for the first time?" Katie asked excitedly.

"I got some nice bread to make buttys," Harry said. "And some cheese to eat alongside. Also have eggs to fry up too. We'll definitely just try them as is of course." He smiled when Hedwig nibbled on his fingers. "I know, you're excited too." He looked at Katie. "She's been with me for every wiping and turning. Looking at them with tasty thoughts."

"I'm sure that'll make them taste better," Katie said confidently.

Hours later, Harry put the two large cuts of bacon on the counter top and the three of them admired them.

"They look just like bacon should," Katie admired. She got the rest of the food ready while Harry cut slightly thicker than normal pieces from both and set to cooking them in the pan. The crackling of the oil and the deep savory scents made their mouths water and Hedwig danced on the countertop, unable to contain her excitement. Finally, they were done and Harry put the finished pieces on a fancy wooden serving tray in the middle of the table.

"Help yourselves," he said and smiled when everyone did just that. They all bit into the rashers of the back bacon first and chewed thoughtfully.

"Mmmm, that's really nice," Katie said, licking her lips. "Meaty, not too salty, a hint of sweetness. It's great!"

"Yeah it is," Harry agreed happily. He bit into a piece of the streaky bacon next. "Oh man, that hickory smoke added so much flavor. It's so good!"

Hedwig chomped noisily with an expression of pure bliss on her face. She barked happily as she continued to munch on rashers and pieces, wiggling with satisfaction.

"You're right, takes a bit of time, but well worth it," Katie said. "I still like the store stuff for snacking or for when you need it quick, but I'd be happy to have a supply of the good stuff that we make."

"Definitely," Harry nodded as he made himself a sandwich and ate hungrily. "It was fun going through the process from beginning to end," he said. "Right?" he asked as he rubbed Hedwig's head.

She nodded and barked thickly through a full beak.

-0-

Years later

"Hey Katie, where do you get the special bacon?"

Katie looked at her mother. "Special bacon?"

"The one with the owl on it? Which I really hope it isn't owl bacon because that would be really weird."

Katie laughed. "Oh that! Let me show you." Katie opened the pantry and pulled out the special curing boxes they were there. On the top was a drawing of Hedwig with a comically large piece of bacon in her beak. "It's the bacon we make. You know, the one we give you?"

Samantha laughed. "Oh! That makes so much more sense! The other day when I was watching Dally, she wanted the special owl bacon and I had no idea what she was talking about."

"We call it Hedwig's Hankerin' Bacon," Katie smiled. "We have some store bacon for quick things but usually eat this. I think Dally associates it with the picture."

"Where did you get the box? I'll get some for home so that way Dally knows," Samantha smiled. "That's a darling illustration."

"Luna's work of course. We make the boxes. Here's some newer ones you can take."

"Thank you. It really is tasty. We use it the most too," Samantha said happily.

"I think most of us do," Katie laughed. "We've gotten so good at making it, we make a lot and resupply everyone when a batch is done. They give us the money to buy the meat and spices."

"Oh well we'll do that too and that way we won't feel bad for just eating it all," Samantha laughed. "And now you have something you can do for a living after you retire."

"Job security is great," Katie smiled.

-0-0-0-

AshokaTheGreat - They're fun to write too. They're very silly.

EbonPurlight - I'm glad you still enjoy them. Thank you very much.

odonnellzoo99 - That would be a bold plan and yes, the bunnies intervened at a good time. Though they probably wouldn't balme him gettting harpooned either to be honest.

choquain - Another hunt, another irritated Dora, and another Harry saving the day.

poka - Yeah. Despite their best efforts, they had to intervene. For the funny at least.

alix33 - It's a good pic of them.

Ghostwriter - Thank you. They can't do things normally.

DOOOOOOM Lord of Waffles - No, he's a bit different.

TheSphynx - He had to act fast or else he'd have more trouble to deal with.