Chapter 93, everybody! We're in the meat of the Mewtwo arc now….
Okay so Mewtwo's plan of cloning 'mons and then using them to repopulate the earth was kind of thin even when there was only 151 Pokémon for the simple reason that he had maybe a quarter of that via the trainers invited, and that's discounting duplicates (i.e., getting Charmander, Squirtle and Bulbasaur when he already has Charizard, Blastoise and Venusaur). And then of course the issue of Pokémon breeding (Pokémon follows the mother's line) and regular real-world genetics and for being all scary and stuff he really didn't think the logistics through. The Distortion Zone is in reference to The Twilight Zone, by the way, and Darkrai mentions Edgar Allen Poe, quotes Freakazoid! and the first Sam Raimi Spider-Man, and references the fan comic Child's Play, a Pokémon Emerald nuzlocke that I spent all morning tracking down again because I couldn't remember the name. It's got a Tim Burton style and is interestingly dark but also hasn't been updated in seven years so…also good luck trying to find it I had to do some serious sifting through my favorites and then searching the name online once I had found it doesn't do much. Did find them on Tumblr and DeviantArt but again, it hasn't been updated since 2015 so….Also quoting Lilo and Stitch and the fourth Pirates of the Caribbean movie, with Ash quoting the first Jurassic Park movie.
And now for reviews: thanks to Dragonkeeper10, thor94, BlastShooter87, Dragon Halfling, AngelicTrinity (yup!), LongNightDragon, Reader, Cyan Quartz, Speed Reader, griffin blackwood, epantoja521, Shaonics6, Summerotter (I appreciate your complaints and I do need to write more about Lewis X'D), and Anonymous Person for the reviews! Love how excited you all are for the big showdown. XD
Also if you saw the chapter without the something different...no you didn't (AKA oops ^^;).
Pokémon © Game Freak; Nintendo
And now, for something completely different:
Tonight on The Distortion Zone—you wake up in the back of a moving van and arrive in a world that is not your own. You are told repeatedly to behave and stay within the bounds of the game, but what is this game? Bloodthirsty and vicious, with your every move monitored…don't fall asleep, and be a good boy….
Ash leaped without thinking, diving after Pikachu without a clear idea as to what he was going to do when gravity took over—straining his fingers to reach—
But before he could, one of those wonky Pokéballs Mewtwo had sent out sucked Pikachu into it.
Inanely, Ash's first thought was that he had broken his promise to Pikachu about never letting him see the inside of a Pokéball.
But he snapped back into action, snagging Pikachu's ball right before he remembered what kind of dire straits he was in—
Which was about the time he hit the water.
Dazed from impact, fingers loosened, slowly recalling that yes, there had been pools around the staircases and boy he was lucky they were deep that could have ended badly—
And then registering that the Pokéballs were leaving, shooting back to the surface—he grabbed his hat and swam frantically after them, surfacing in time to see the balls retreating to some hole in the floor—
He scrambled out of the pool, barely hearing his friends yelling for him before diving into the hole after the Pokéballs.
He was getting his friends back.
Team Rocket had been freaked out enough by the weird machine, freaked out enough by the fact that it had cloned Meowth.
Now, the sudden sound of sirens blaring had startled them into seizing each other, shaking as parts of the mechanism began to move….
And then a conveyor belt started moving into the machine—
And started bringing in Pokéballs.
"I've never seen that kind of Pokéball before," James managed to eke out after it was clear they weren't all going to die messily. "What is it?"
"I don't know, but there's a lot of them," Jessie said. "And they're all going into that machine."
They watched, nervous….
A screen blinked to life.
"Hey, look!" Meowth said, pointing. "That screen's showin' a bunch o' different Pokémon! That was Vileplume—and Rapidash and Dewgong—"
"And Nidoqueen and Tauros and Blastoise and Venusaur," James said.
"And Parasect and Gyarados and Vulpix and Haunter," Jessie said—
Before they all yelped at the new noise the machine was making, spun to see—
The weird liquid-filled tubes that had disgorged the Kantoan starter trio's final evolutions and currently Meowth's double now had new Pokémon flowing in—Ninetales and Vaporeon and Dodrio and—
"What's that noise?" James asked.
"Sounds like someone in pain," Jessie said, looking up the hole the conveyor belt was coming from. "And it sounds like it's coming from there—"
Which was about the time the twerp with the hat fell onto the conveyor belt.
"Where did you come from?" James asked, startled.
"I don't have time for the motto right now!" the twerp yelled, running for the last Pokéball about to be sucked into the machine—
"AAH! NO!" Meowth yelled, dancing in place as Jessie and James started to panic as well. "One-a youse is bad enough!"
Too late—the twerp dove in. They looked at the screen, not liking what they were about to see—
The machine registered Pikachu easily enough, before the screen started fritzing and the sirens started sounding frantic—yelling was coming from inside—
And then the twerp was fighting his way back out, straining against a bunch of grasping pincers seeking to haul him back in—
Jessie and James quickly grabbed his arms, hauling back as hard as they could—Meowth jumped up, slashed at the pincers, severing several before dropping back, in case they tried to snatch him instead—
And then the three humans were flat on the floor, the odd Pokéball bouncing away—
Before popping out Pikachu.
"AAAAaaaa…oh wait, I'm not falling," Pikachu observed, uncurling and shaking his head.
"Pikachu!" the twerp cheered, snatching the electric rodent up. "You're okay!"
"We're fine, thanks for asking," James coughed.
"Yeah," Jessie groaned, sitting up. "It's not like we didn't have a hundred pounds of twerp land on us."
"Ninety-five," said twerp corrected. "Sorry, I—what are you guys doing here, anyway?"
"Believe me, I's been asking myself dat same question," Meowth said, before yelping at a new noise behind him—the Pokémon were being forced out of the tubes—
And then the sparking machine exploded, sending Pokéballs flying everywhere.
Meowth ducked, dodged—yelped in alarm when the Pokéballs started disgorging their contents.
"Hey! Stop!" he yelped. "We're not all going to fit!"
Some of the Pokémon heard, maneuvered out into the hall the clones had disappeared down so there'd be more room for the rest of the ones appearing—
"Haunter! Lenny! Frenzy!" Ash cheered, spotting the dreaded Parasect.
"Oh no, don't tell me that one got cloned," Jessie moaned.
And then there were no more flashes.
"Is it over?" James asked, voice muffled thanks to him being curled up in a ball.
"Yeah, it's ovah," Meowth said, squeezing between two Pokémon to stand next to him.
James looked up at the machine, which released a Pikachu as the final cloned 'mon. "Is it bad that I was expecting a twerpachu?"
"Yes," Jessie replied promptly.
"That would have been cool though," the twerp agreed.
"Well it ain't happenin', so we might as well move on," Meowth said. "What's goin' on here? We got the whole people are invited ting, and then we ran into dis clonin' machine and everything went sideways."
"We ended up in the Distortion Zone," the twerp said promptly.
"That was on my list of options I didn't want to be true," James said, hugging himself tighter.
"Get up," Jessie said, kicking him. "And we're not in the Distortion Zone."
"We would have heard the music by now," Squirtle said. "Or Rod Starly."
"I'm not talking to you anymore," Bulbasaur sighed.
The twerp stood. "There's this weird Pokémon up there called Mewtwo, and he wants to destroy the world and repopulate it using only clones."
"Does he even know the logistics involved wid dat?" Meowth asked. "Takin' over da world is enough of a hassle."
"You guys would know."
"Team Rocket's accounting division already ran the numbers," Jessie said primly. "And if some weird Pokémon is going to destroy the world, I vote we run."
"To where?" James asked, standing finally, leaning on the conveyor belt for support. "If it's going to destroy the world, there's no place to run to."
"There's still outer space."
"I can't move there—I get motion sick."
"You do not."
"Fine, I read Ender's Game and hated the idea of living in space."
"And dere's Deoxys and Rayquaza up dere," Meowth pointed out.
"This is also true."
"Uh, hello!" the twerp yelled. "We have to do something. You guys run if you want, but we're going to go stop Mewtwo."
Jessie and James exchanged glances.
"Well, we don't have anything better to do," she sighed.
The twerp nodded sharply, maneuvered through the crowd of Pokémon to leave through the hall, followed by the others, filing out until it was Team Rocket taking up the rear….
Meowth paused to glance back at the machine, still sparking and fidgeting ominously, like it wasn't quite done….
He shuddered and hurried after the rest.
Darkrai had examined the whole island top to bottom and could establish one thing: with the exception of the open battlefield that the humans were in, the place was abandoned.
Talk about a fishy setup.
So, we've established that this is a trap.
"We have indeed," Darkrai muttered, tapping his claws against his beak. "Now it's just the question of who set it and how."
We should set it off—they'd never expect that.
Darkrai snorted. "Oh yes, that'll teach them to underestimate stupid people." Speaking of—obvious place to spring the trap would be where everyone was gathered—
And on cue, people started screaming.
"Figures I have to go save the day again," he muttered, zooming back up to the tip of a rooftop to look down—
There was a ton of dust from what looked to have been a frantic battle, people running around everywhere—he didn't see yutz and the rat.
"It'd be my luck he went and found the pit and the pendulum," he muttered, claws digging into the shingle as he squinted against the lights, scanning the field—there was Misty and Brock with a bunch of other humans, yelling at….
Darkrai was not familiar with the numerous different Pokémon species, but he was knowledgeable enough—so for now, he was putting the bipedal purple cat-mon under the now I've seen it do I care file. Misty was yelling something about you can't do this!, so he was guessing that said bipedal-purple-cat-mon had done something. Can't have gotten rid of the yutz, that wouldn't elicit that response.
"I already have," the purple thing announced—
And then a spot behind it exploded, prompting everyone to turn—
As a bunch of Pokémon came out of the hole in the ground.
"Let me guess," Darkrai muttered, finding this amusing. "'There was a perfectly good door three feet from there, you couldn't use that?'"
The purple thing nodded, turned to face the crowd with its arms outspread. "Your time is up, but I am a merciful being—I will allow you to run, but you cannot escape your fate. I will destroy this world and remake it—the clones shall inherit the earth."
"I thought attack of the clones was next summer," Darkrai said, already poising himself to launch down at the thing—destroying the world fell under the don't let it happen file.
"Not if we can help it!"
And right on cue: yutz and friends, coming out of the hole behind the first group of Pokémon, leading…an almost identical group of Pokémon. Ah right, the clones bit.
Darkrai sighed, launched himself into action—with the yutz out there, the opportune moment was at hand.
Mostly because said yutz could never think any action through.
Ash had thought their entrance nice and dramatic, timed to perfection to hit that opportune moment Darkrai was always talking about. And he was pretty sure his emergence through the smoke was all nice and cool—didn't cough or anything.
Mewtwo still didn't seem impressed upon turning to see him. "Oh, you."
"Oh, me," Ash said, before pointing at Mewtwo. "You can't destroy the world! We won't let you!"
Mewtwo tipped its head haughtily. "I think we've already established your ability to stop me."
Ash blew out a hmph—yes, psychic abilities and those stupid balls that caught Pokémon regardless of being caught previously. New plan—
I suppose the only good part about stupid plans is that smart people never think of them.
Ash quirked a smile at that memory—well, might as well go for the stupid plan.
So he charged Mewtwo with the intent of punching that smug look right off of him.
Mewtwo simply batted him away psychically, before he could even get close, sending him tumbling across the battlefield.
"And we've established how much use that approach is," Mewtwo continued. "Try it again, and I'll simply turn you into paste right here."
Ash barely heard him—Ash was busy hopping back up and charging him again.
"Ash, look out!" Misty and Brock were yelling—
Too late—Psybeam straight for him—even skidding to a halt and changing course wouldn't do it—
And then there was something big and black in front of him, and the Psybeam was spliced and flying harmlessly by on either side of him.
Ah….
Ash grinned as Darkrai struck a battle pose.
"Okay, I've had enough of your overdramatic melodramatics," Darkrai said. "Now shut up, be a good boy, and go find a wall to run into."
"And what are you supposed to be?" Mewtwo asked, recovering.
"Me? I'm nobody. Just the guy who's going to grind you into a pulp." Darkrai pointed a claw at Mewtwo. "What's this about destroying the world, remaking it, and then running it? Do you have any idea of the logistics involved there? What kind of two-bit villain are you?"
"See, dat's what we said," Ash heard Meowth mutter from behind.
"Enough," Mewtwo hissed, waving one of those weird balls over—
Darkrai caught it and crushed it.
"Oh wow, you're playing the newbie—even the village idiot behind me knew better than to try to capture a Pokémon at full strength."
"I know when I'm being mocked," Ash decided to point out.
"Good for you. Now hush while mom and dad argue."
"Who do you think you are?" Mewtwo demanded.
In response, Darkrai struck a pose.
"I am the Nightmare King—the terror that stalks in the night, the death of many before you and probably a good deal after you. I am Darkrai, the pitch-black Legendary—and you, my friend, are in a very bad position, considering you reek of Psychic typing."
"Such talk," Mewtwo said. "But I am the world's most powerful Pokémon—you stand no chance against me."
"Then fighting me wouldn't be an issue, now would it, you hairless twat?" Darkrai asked. "Unless you're too scared to fight me."
Mewtwo snorted. "I won't be intimidated by the likes of you—all talk and no action," he shot as he floated up. "We'll see how big you're talking when my clones prove in battle their superiority to the originals."
Apparently that was a cue, since the cloned Pokémon all roared and charged for the originals. The originals snarled back, maneuvered to meet them—
"Now hold it! Hold everything!" Darkrai yelled, planting himself between the clones and the originals, claws out. Everyone skidded to a halt.
"And you said something about me doing that," Ash said to him.
"The difference is, I know what I'm doing. Moving on," Darkrai said, addressing the crowd of Pokémon. "You want to fight them, because he said so," he said, pointing at the clones, the originals, and then Mewtwo. "Meantime, he still wants to fight me. I say, why have everyone fight at all? If he wants to fight me, let us have at it. The rest of you bug off, seeing as how your fights won't have any effect whatsoever—kick back, try the buffet…place some wagers, even."
Silence.
"I can get behind dat," Meowth said, sheathing his claws.
"Meowth meow," Meowth's clone said.
"A pointless offer," Mewtwo pointed out.
"Not at all," Darkrai said, wagging a claw in a tsk-tsk fashion. "You want them to follow you? I don't care if a Pokémon is made in a test tube or not, they'll always operate under two options: self-survival and loyalty. Do they have that with you? No. They're currently listening to you because they think you're the strongest 'mon in the room. That's how Pokémon work in the wild—it's better self-preservation in the long run to back the winning Rapidash." With that, Darkrai spun—rather dramatically, Ash felt—to face Mewtwo. "But here's the thing—in the wild, when two Pokémon of equal strength meet, they fight to establish dominance. The winning Pokémon is the one the others follow. You think you're so tough? I'm calling you out."
"Do what?"
"Am I speaking in code? You, me, fight. Winner gets to continue on with whatever grand scheme they want. Mine might involve making you into a rug. No wasting everyone else's energy, because at the end of this battle they'll know who they want to follow. Sound simple enough, Mister 'I'm-the-world's-most-powerful-Pokémon'?"
Mewtwo narrowed his eyes at Darkrai. "Fair enough. I've already formulated a strategy to beat you."
"Ooh, I can't wait," Darkrai said, bowing low to the ground, claws brushing the dirt.
Ash knew how Darkrai operated, so he wasn't at all surprised when Darkrai surged up, flinging a great pawful of dirt straight into Mewtwo's face, following it up with a Sucker Punch to the gut before zinging off.
"You—you dirty cheat!" Mewtwo yelled, zooming off after him.
"Haven't you heard?" Darkrai asked, circling around quickly, wagging his claws at Mewtwo. "All's fair in love and war—and this ain't love!"
Mewtwo shot after him, but Darkrai was already zooming away, not looking concerned in the least.
Someone coughed, and Ash looked back down to see a bunch of Pokémon, their clones, and their trainers all looking at him.
"So," Ash noised, not sure where to go from here. "Who's hungry?"