Starship Troopers: Rico & Dizzy
Oh, no, my muse won't even leave this alone! Verhoeven utterly missed the point of the excellent novel, quite apart from leaving out the powered suits and making Dizzy a woman. A number of things wrong with it:
1) No powered suits.
2) No proper military discipline. In the novel the M.I. fought By The Book. Not here. You couldn't intimidate Bugs just by charging - Bugs could not be intimidated. Apart from being incapable of fear or understanding the concept of self-sacrifice (except when ordered to by their brain caste), they typically numbered in the millions - and could easily replace losses in the short time it took them to breed; they were hatched knowing how to fight. It took Federal Services a minimum of 19 years to even begin to replace one soldier. Speaking of the Bugs, where were the noncombatant workers?
3) Rico did make a stupid mistake in training, for which he received five lashes, but he certainly didn't get a buddy killed. Might have in real combat - hence the lashes, the barest sort of compliment the M.I. paid a screwup, i.e. you might be salvageable - but no-one died. Zim should have ordered a ceasefire the instant Breckinridge's helmet was off - and Rico should have been given a court-martial and kicked out in disgrace. If you failed/quit in any way for any reason, or even didn't turn up at the appointed time, in the novel your papers were marked "term not completed satisfactorily", and you never, ever got another chance.
4) No powered suits.
5) The M.I. would never have allowed recruits who hadn't even finished boot camp into battle, still less to become officers. "Who are all these kids?" indeed - he was only 19, if that! Carl, too, would never have become an officer in charge of fighting men without having been a fighting man. One point the novel addressed was that even back then there were more admin staff than real fighting men in the real Army and Navy. They had (still have?) differing insignia to distinguish those who had been in combat from those who hadn't. Disgraceful IMO - if I'd ever signed up, no way in hell would I have wanted a CO who'd never seen real combat.
6) Dizzy was male in the novel; there were no female M.I. boots. Okay, it was written in the '50s, but the author was doubtless taking the relative lack of upper-body strength of women into account...not allowing for their strengths in other areas, granted. Nowadays there are female Navy files, soldiers, astronauts, firefighters - AND RIGHTLY SO.
Not that I think women and men are equal. They're not. They're different. Like apples and oranges, they can be contrasted but never compared. Both are fruits, high in fibre and Vitamin C, are good for you and are delicious. But apples are crunchy, whereas oranges are soft. Apples don't need peeling; oranges do. Apples are red or green; oranges are...well, it's in the name. Which is 'superior'?
Same with men & women. Women can't conceive (yet) without men, or at least sperm. Men can't give birth or suckle a baby. Yet both are (ATM) vital to create babies. Neither is superior to the other. Nor are they the same. Vive la difference!
7) No powered suits.
8) The society in the novel wasn't even vaguely fascist. No-one votes in a fascist regime.
9) Further, the franchise was not limited to military veterans. You had to serve at least your (two-year) term in Federal Service, but you weren't necessarily on the front line. Carl (as originally written) was as important to the war effort in R & D as Rico was, if not more so, and had he not been killed on Pluto he would have earned the vote - without ever firing a shot or even seeing a Bug up close and personal. Yet his service counted just as much as Rico's did. A veteran was not necessarily a soldier.
10) No powered suits.
11) A trained cap trooper would never make the stupid mistake Rico did in pulling out the Bug foreleg - being serrated, it did more damage coming out than going in. It was designed that way by the Bugs' breeding. Poor Dizzy might, barely, have survived if Rico hadn't done that. Drama, yes, but where's the realism? It's a wonder Earth isn't careering out of orbit due to the Coriolis force generated by Heinlein spinning in his grave at Warp 9, and the fact that the film was intended as satire is irrelevant!
12) No-one unproven in combat (being injured and surviving does not a soldier make) would be advanced in rank so quickly. For Rico to be acting El-Tee was just ridiculous.
13) No powered suits!
14) If Career Sergeant Charlie Zim broke a recruit's arm it would be by accident and he would have apologised. No way would such a skilled combatant deliberately injure someone. Besides, it would put them on the binnacle list until they healed, and the M.I. could not afford the time.
15) Ditto Ace (who was shortchanged; in the novel he was a serious rival to Rico, years older and far more competent) receiving a knife to the hand. A harsh lesson might be taught, it's true - but not like that. Not that harsh.
16) Did I mention the powered suits, or lack thereof?
17) The Rodger Young had all kinds of sensors and whatnot. But even today, even at Top Gun, pilots are taught to rely mainly on the Mark One Eyeball, the one onboard instrument the bad guys can't jam. Radar, HUD, IR, all are potentially vulnerable and/or can be spoofed. It is unlikely a future Navy would be any different. What kind of pilot would Carmen be if she couldn't see a city-sized Bug meteor approaching? And BTW, how did it get past the defences, shown in the propaganda, to smear B.A.?
18) Starships are very large, very expensive hardware. A rookie pilot would not be permitted to fly one with so little training, however much of a natural pilot she was. Having talent is one thing. Applying it is something else. She tossed her cookies at the mere sight of a Bug - how would she cope with zero-G?
19) Neither Zander nor Carmen were bald - indeed, no Navy file was.
20) Rico's racial background was wrong. Not sure what his colouring would be, but not Caucasian.
21) Combining Lieutenant Rasczak and Lieutenant Colonel Jean Dubois was a mistake IMO. Rasczak ended up shortchanged, too; originally he was an easygoing guy, not a hardass.
22) Why would a Career Sergeant accept a demotion? Preposterous. Zim earned his stripes.
23) Even an emergency bulkhead has safety measures built into it, even today; Captain Deladrier should not have been cut in two.
(Though Shujumi's talk of Harvard costing "an arm and a leg" was spot-on...because those were the very limbs the Bugs tore off him during Operation Bughouse. An example of the gory humour for which Verhoeven is notorious.)
Still...
Tango Urilla
After the M.I. victory
Rico tentatively approached Lieutenant Rasczak. "Excuse me, sir."
But Rasczak had seen the altercation between him and Flores. He knew what she'd really asked him, if Rico did not. There were no regs against it in the M.I., a realistic organisation. So he anticipated the question. "Rico. You once asked me for advice. Want some now?"
Rico nodded. "Yes, sir."
"Lieutenant, HQ is on the com," a private told Rasczak, who acknowledged and said quietly to Rico:
"Never pass up a good thing."
He didn't. Rico might've been dumb enough to sign up for the M.I. (for a girl who wasn't even romantically interested in him, really), but he had the smarts to recognise an opportunity when it came a-knockin'.
Especially when it was knocking with a battering ram.
An individual of cruder mind - i.e. a civilian - might have said Dizzy was gagging for it.
She would have shrugged and said, "I was. So the fuck what? You have to be a citizen to get wet and horny?"
Inside a tent
When he entered, Dizzy was in a bunk. She smiled coyly. "So, Rico, what are you doing after the dance?"
He got under the bedsheet with her and chuckled as she pulled herself on top of him.
"What's so funny?" she asked, caressing him.
"You know, just the way things work out."
She wasn't Carmen, he knew. But she was warm, and beautiful, and alive...and here.
A boot once told him, "Take love - or sex - wherever you can get it, buddy." (True, this was before he was booted out for propositioning a lesbian who wasn't interested in the slightest - unduly offended (he was at least polite), she reported it to Zim, who passed it up, the result of which was that he was discharged on the grounds of 'conduct unbecoming' - but the point was still valid.)
Good advice. When was the last time I got laid outside of school?
But although he was inexperienced, he wanted to treat her with respect.
Even if she wanted to be spanked. Or caned. Or even whipped (a joke to himself; he knew she wasn't kinky. Damphousse, now, she was a dirty bitch).
"We finally got together, Diz." In truth he'd always liked her almost as much as he had Carmen, and guessed (correctly) that she felt more towards him.
Dizzy turned as serious as she'd been when he nearly quit. "I love you, Johnny."
They kissed. He didn't say it back. Maybe he didn't feel it yet.
Not yet.
Then, outside the tent:
"Rico!"
Shit, both thought, wondering if this was one of the "thirty-one ways to crash and burn" (it wasn't, as Rico would learn - you had to do something much more serious, e.g. strike a superior officer (outside of combat training, when you had official permission to do so...if you could, with Career Sergeant Zim) or disobey an order, than fucking a fellow M.I.). Dizzy burrowed under the bedsheet as Rasczak pulled aside the curtain and rapped, "We're moving out. There's been a distress call from General Owen on Planet P. So get your shit wired and report in ten minutes."
"Yes, sir," Rico acknowledged, hoping his former teacher, who'd turned out to be the hardest hardass in the whole M.I. (God, if his History & Moral Philosophy students could see him now!), wouldn't notice.
He did, of course. He hadn't made Lieutenant in the M.I. by missing things. He noticed the surreptitious movements under the bedsheet.
"Who's that with you?"
Sheepishly Dizzy emerged from under the bedsheet. "Flores, sir."
Then Rasczak proved how very well he knew people - especially cap troopers. He sort-of smiled. "Make it 20 minutes."
Unable to believe their luck (though it was anything but), they answered, "Yes, sir."
He left.
Dizzy looked at Rico. "Twenty minutes?"
Rico was nonchalant. "We can do it."
They began undressing hurriedly, Dizzy giggling. Despite the time pressure, though they knew an extra ten minutes would make little difference to an M.I. boat such as Rodger Young, they might not have managed it had Dizzy not taken charge of the sex, by straddling Rico and, basically, screwing herself on him.
He laughed, "What am I, a dildo?! Diz, take it easy, you're gonna wear it away!"
Gyrating wildly, her gorgeous breasts bouncing, she moaned, "Shut the fuck up, grunt, I'm gonna come! Oh, God, yes! Yes! YES!"
I swear, he thought delightedly as he climaxed inside her and she screamed in ecstasy, her face flushed clear to her breasts and her hair wild, I have never come so fucking hard!
Exhausted, perspiring (even randy bitches like Dizzy Flores are ladies, and ladies don't sweat), but very happy, she collapsed onto him.
Outside, Ace heard, and grinned, happy for his friend. Go for it, man. You, too, Rico, he quipped to himself.
For his part, Rico didn't think about Carmen at all. He just held the warm cuddly bundle who'd just fucked him with such enthusiasm. God, she was terrific. He was almost wondering what he'd ever seen in Carmen. If there was anyone who happily grabbed Life by the throat, it was Dizzy.
"I love you," she murmured again. "It's okay, you don't need to say it back if you don't feel it yet. I just wanted to tell you."
Stroking her hair, he conceded, "Okay." Then he checked the time. "Hey, we still have three minutes."
Dizzy raised her tousled head and chuckled at the implied offer. "Oh, you wish. Let's move, Rico."
Maybe she was right, he reflected as they dressed. Maybe he didn't feel it yet.
When they reported to Rasczak, saluting, he noted, "I gave you 20 minutes." He gave his sort-of smile and said, "Nice one, Flores."
While Rico aped a landed fish, Dizzy giggled.
The Lieutenant jerked his artificial thumb at the transport. "Get your asses aboard." They did.
Kids.
Planet P
Just after Dizzy has taken out a Flame Bug
But he felt differently when, while she was cheering, an Arachnid soldier came up behind her. He made the fatal mistake of yelling her name instead of "Look out!". He'd thought to warn her, but she was distracted by it. She turned - and the Bug skewered her with a foreleg as she was turning. Then, as she screamed, another. Then the first out, to rip her fragile body, and in again. Desperately he and other troopers gave precision fire to take out the Bug without hitting Dizzy.
Ironically, the lessons they'd learned in boot camp served them well now.
She was screaming in agony, blood spraying liberally. The Bug jerked under their fire, and the foreleg it currently had buried in Dizzy's chest snapped off. She collapsed; only the Bug had been holding her upright. With her clear, the troopers could fire for effect, and did. The Bug soon expired.
Though others - many, many others - were coming.
He knelt by her, shocked at all the blood. "Ace, help me! Hold her down!"
Then, in a misguided attempt to help her, Rico did exactly the wrong thing: Instead of leaving the foreleg buried in her, where it was at least plugging the wound, he tore it out. She screamed louder, for the limb was serrated and did more damage coming out than it had going in. More blood spurted.
(The boots didn't realise that the Arachnids had bred their soldiers for precisely that purpose, knowing their enemies were soft-shelled. They had consciously directed their own evolution to that exact end. Any Arachnids whose forelegs were not serrated were immediately killed to prevent any possibility of their passing on their non-serrated gene. The Arachnids could spare a few. A few thousand.
A few million.)
Human instinct on seeing a penetrating wound is to pull out whatever's penetrating, on the grounds that whatever it is, it doesn't belong in there. However, this is EXACTLY THE WRONG THING TO DO.
Standard First Aid procedure when dealing with a puncture weapon, whether it's serrated or not but especially if it is:
Do NOT pull it out.
Leave it to the medics, who are experts and will extract it in a manner causing much less damage, if any. First priority is to stop the bleeding, if possible, leaving alone anything penetrating - especially if pulling it out will exacerbate the injury. Second is to secure medical help ASAP.
But in his panic, Rico forgot Rule One.
(A medic would later berate him for this, growling, "Stupidest thing I've heard of since med school! You DO NOT pull out a penetrating object! Got that? NOT!" Then he sighed. "But I know you were trying to help her. At least I know you won't do that again."
"No, sir," Rico murmured, "never again."
The medic patted the younger man's shoulder, and Rico felt a little better.)
"Move!" he cried now. "Get her into the boat! C'mon, Diz, don't die on me!" He yelled to the other cap troopers, "Let s get her out! Let's go, let's go! Let's go! Get aboard!"
The boat pilot - Zander, Rico noticed absently - came out and gave them covering fire, not sparing the ammo. "Let's go! Get aboard!"
They did, to Dizzy's screams. She tried not to, but, oh God, her guts (the ones still in her ruined body) hurt so bad, like fire.
"Tower, let's go!" Zander yelled to the two brave troopers manning the tower. There were Bugs closing rapidly. Thousands of Bugs.
"Let's move it, tower! Run!"
But as they did, a Flame Bug unleashed its lethal spray of fiery hot acid or whatever; it was more like lava than anything else. Caught in it, both men shrieked and started to melt. Recognising there was nothing he could do for them now, he re-entered the boat even as they collapsed into fiery messes, somehow still shrieking, and ordered his copilot, "Lift off!"
Rico was watching Dizzy die, feeling more anguished and helpless than he had when Breckinridge accidentally bought it - and that, too, had been his fault. With the clarity that comes to the dying, Dizzy managed through bloodstained lips, "Johnny, I'm dying. Dying..."
"No," he tried to deny it, with a confidence he didn't feel, "you're gonna be alright, Diz." He was at least a little confident; after all, he'd been impaled by a Bug back on Klendathu, and he came through okay, such was the skill of the doctors. He failed to realise or acknowledge that a) it was only through a leg and not something more vital, b) the troopers who got him to the evac boat in the sauve qui peut didn't even try to pull it out, and c) medical help was a lot closer.
He had to encourage her. It was what you did.
But Dizzy knew the truth. She felt cold, because she knew she'd lost too much blood. Her guts hurt so much. She tried to smile, saying, "It's alright...because I got to have you." Then she started to choke on her own blood and, panicked, she cried, "Johnny, don't let me go! Joh...Joh...don't let...don't let..."
Those were Private Isabelle 'Dizzy' Flores' last words. Her posthumous promotion would come as small comfort to Rico.
"This is traffic control. Proceed on vector five-niner-two-two-seven."
The copilot complied silently, though by SOP she should have acknowledged.
Settling in to pilot position, Zander said, "I think you should know...your friend Rico is back there."
Carmen, for it was she, looked back...and was saddened, but not surprised, to see Dizzy dead. She had to be, from losing so much blood.
She had never been a vindictive woman; she was genuinely sorry for Dizzy's death. Sorrier for Johnny (there was no way she could express her pleasure at seeing the M.I. had made a mistake in posting him KIA), whom she could see was grieving.
But not for long.
He rose and made his way for'ard, snapping savagely, "Get on the com and tell Fleet to glass that rock!"
While respecting his pain - he'd clearly lost a good friend if not a lover - SOP required Zander to inquire, "On whose authority, Corporal?"
"That would be mine, sir," Rico grated, "I assumed command of the mission."
Zander did not comment, he merely accepted this. "Rodger Young, we have an official request from the Mobile Infantry to commence bombardment of Planet P."
Carmen spoke, to Rico. "I thought you were dead."
"I'm not," he told her, and added bitterly, "but a lot of my troopers are." Including Dizzy, he didn't say.
She had the grace not to make things worse by answering.
Instead, Captain Deladrier did. "Negative on your request, Zander. The Sky Marshal has other plans for Planet P." She smiled. "Welcome back."
Rico wasn't surprised. Though this came very close to insubordination, he snarled, "M.I. does the dying, Fleet just does the flying!"
Zander could have called him on the carpet for that - especially as the Captain had heard it - but despite the bad blood between them, and even though he outranked Rico, he was a fair-minded man and cut Rico some slack - poor bastard had just lost someone close. Deladrier also let it go when Zander explained. She knew what it was like to lose a lover to the Bugs.
Knew all too well.
Besides, there was some truth in what the upset corporal (acting El-Tee) had said.
But if what the top brass suspected about Planet P panned out, maybe they could reduce the dying.
Some, anyway...
THE END
"Sir, I don't understand. Who needs a knife in a nuke fight, anyway? All
you gotta do is press a button. Sir."
"Put your hand on that wall, trooper."
(Ace hesitates)
"PUT YOUR HAND ON THAT WALL!"
(He does. Zim throws a knife and hits Ace's hand, pinning it to the wall)
"The enemy cannot push a button...if you disable his hand. Medic!"
- Starship Troopers