A\N: This was originally going to be a one shot but due to how long it is, I've decided to split it up into chapters, and it'll be a Willicia HEA, Angels.
I have no idea where this one came from but it is a Willicia pairing with MAJOR Peter and Jackie hate and Alicia/Diane friendship along with Alicia/Cary friendship. I am letting my fingers do the thinking for me on this Willicia story.
This has been on my hard drive for months and I'm finally getting around to finishing it.
(I'm also working on the fourth chapter of my new White Collar fic called Neal's hope while also writing this one.)
Enjoy, Angels.
Alicia Florrick (nee Cavanaugh) stares at the large grey gravestone, drying tears on her face, one hand on top of the marble. Her other hand encased in his, the others are behind her, silently supporting her each in their own ways, just by their presence here.
He's been by her side since she found out about their deaths. They all have, all of them except her mother and brother.
Her eyes are on the names that are staring back at her in gold lettering:
Zachary Florrick.
Grace Florrick.
The names of her children, her babies.
Her babies who are now dead, thanks to their father and grandmother, their father's mother.
Her babies, who didn't do anything but love their father and grandmother, despite knowing how bad they were to their mother, with their whole hearts, are the ones who ended up dead, buried in the ground, rotting forever, unable to grow up and fall in love, the way she did, twice. She's loved twice, loved one man more than the other.
Her eyes finally leave the names and she buries her head in his chest, sobs ripping from her throat as the first drops of a rain storm fall down on them. He wraps his arms around her and helps her to her feet with the help from his partner and her friend.
"Mommy will always love you, babies." Alicia tells her children's graves as she's led away from the grave site. It's the first words she said since this morning. Unknown to her, they've all been keeping an eye out for HIM and his bitch of a mother, who were not invited to the funeral despite being their father and grandmother. Alicia is barely holding it together as it is and if they showed up, Alicia would snap and no one would be able to stop her, not even Will who has been by her side ever since that awful night that her world came crashing down around her. Alicia is hanging on by a thin thread and it'll only take one word, one look. One person, to make it snap.
When she's led out of the cemetery, she stops, looking back at the grave which now houses her dead children.
"I… I can't leave them." She whispers, looking at the cluster of wet people who have become her rocks these last few weeks.
"Leesh." Will says softly from her side. She looks at her best friend, tears falling down her face.
"They're my babies, Will. I can't leave them, please don't make me leave them.." She begs, sobbing as she falls to the ground, her heels unable to support her legs anymore, Will drops down beside her, pulling her into his arms, not caring what it looks like to the passersby. "I've got you, Leesh, I've got." He whispers to her, kissing her hair which is soaked from the rain that's falling down on all of them.
"Come on, sis. You've gotta let them go." Her brother says, Alicia glares at her little brother as she's helped to her feet by someone.
She's snapped and everyone knows it. Owen made her snap, at least a little bit.
"You don't know what this has been like, Owen. They were your niece and nephew but that's all they were to you. To Mom, they were her grandchildren who didn't know anything about her because she was never around! That's all they've ever been to you: grandchildren and a niece and nephew. To me… to me, they were my children, my everything, my entire world! My babies, the two people I was supposed to protect above everyone else! I was meant to protect them and I didn't. I failed as their mother, I failed as a daughter, as a sister, as a best friend, as a lawyer, as a wife and as a girlfriend. I'm a fucking failure. I should be the one that's dead, not them. My children are dead because of me. I killed my children. I should be dead for killing my children!" Alicia shouts before wrenching her hand from Will's and stumbling to the cars and getting into Will's passenger seat, leaning her head on the window and letting the tears fall for the thousandth time today.
Will Gardner had never heard his best friend, the love of his life, scream that raw or that loud, until she found out about the deaths of her children. Her scream will forever be cemented into his brain, he won't ever forget it and neither will anyone else who heard it.
He, Diane, Cary, David, Julius, Kalinda, everyone who is here right now, were all there when Alicia found out about the deaths of Zach and Grace Florrick, except Veronica and Owen and Eli, who was with his daughter.
Flashback:
It's late, or early depending in how one looked at it, nearing 4 am to be exact, and everyone is working on a big case, well everyone apart from him and Alicia who are dancing, they put away their anger towards each other and become friends again, something that happened when Alicia ended up in the hospital after she passed out in court and the hospital called Will who is her emergency contact, when someone enters the conference room, ending the dance between him and Alicia, the music on his ipad is turned down until it can't be heard by anyone in the glassed room.
"Can I help you?" Diane asks the man and woman who are standing in the conference room doorway.
"Detectives Morrow and Hanley, we need to speak to Alicia Florrick." The male detective, Morrow, says as he and the woman show them their badges. Alicia looks at them, fear in her eyes.
"That's me. What can I do for you two, Detectives?" She asks, slipping on her heels and going into Lawyer mode, hiding her fear from everyone but him, Diane, Cary, Kalinda, David and Julius.
"We need to talk to you in private." Morrow says, Alicia shakes her head. "No, you interrupted all of us while we're working on a huge case that combines both our firms, so therefore you talk to me in front of all of my team or not at all." Leesh counters back, taking his hand. Morrow sighs and nods.
"Mrs Florrick, it's about your children, husband and mother-in-law, who were all involved in a car accident earlier this morning. Unfortunately, your children didn't make it. We are so sorry for your loss." Morrow says, feeling anything but sorry for Alicia's loss.
Alicia looks at the two detectives, gauging their facial expressions to see if they're telling the truth, which they are and an ear shattering scream fills the conference room.
Alicia screams, and falls to her knees, bringing him with her. The colour has drained from his face.
"NO!" Alicia screams at the top of her lungs before bursting into loud sobs.
Will closes his eyes as he gathers her into his arms, trying to comfort her silently, rocking her like he did so many times in college, he doesn't bother speaking, none of them do, they all know that there are no words for this.
He looks around the room: Diane has tears in her eyes that are dangerously close to spilling, Cary is looking at his partner with tears falling down his face as he walks towards him and Alicia and strokes her back, the younger lawyer was close to Zach and grace and also hated Peter and Jackie Florrick with a passion, Kalinda is on her cell phone, walking out the room, Robyn is stunned with files in her hands, Julius has a look of hate on his face, David has a look of glee on his face, most likely plotting ways to ruin Peter and Jackie Florrick more than they a;ready are, but the look of glee is also mixed with a look of sadness for Alicia.
All of their eyes meet and they all say the same thing: we will get her through this, one way or another.
Will comes out of that night with a sigh. "I want to kill Peter and Jackie Florrick." Cary Agos growls, looking at Will's car where his partner is. The small group that contains Will, Diane, Cary, David, Julius, Kalinda, Robyn, Veronica, Owen and Eli, all nod in agreement.
"Will, I want to thank you for being there for my daughter, all of you, thank you for being there for my daughter." Veronica says hoarsely. Will only nods and walks away toward Alicia, the love of his life, the woman he's been in love with for 20 years. He has no words for Veronica Loy or Owen Cavanaugh. They only flew in yesterday for the funeral and didn't say anything supportive to Alicia except the few hugs they gave her when they arrived at Will's place where he, Alicia and Diane have been staying since that night, and occasionally Cary. They didn't see how much effort it was to get Alicia out of bed this morning, or how hard it was to get her to drink one cup of coffee and eat a bagel that he made for her.
Will gets in the driver's side of his car and places a hand on her thigh, she covers his hand with one of her own as he pulls away from the cemetery and drives them to the place Alicia has called home for the past few weeks, unable to go back to the apartment which is full of memories of her and her children.
He doesn't mind having her with him, in fact he'd rather have her at his place instead of at the apartment where he, Diane, Cary and the others can be with her without HIM or his mother coming over seeing as they don't know where Will or Diane live.
The car ride back to his apartment from the cemetery is a silent one with Leesh staring out of the window and him keeping an eye on the road, while sneaking looks at his best friend at every red light. Diane pulls up beside him with Cary in the passenger seat.
Will gets out just as Cary is opening Alicia's car door. Will and Diane share a smile as Cary helps Alicia out of the car and puts a hand on the small of her back, leading her into Will's apartment building.
"How long are you going to allow Alicia to stay with you?" His partner asks as they follow the younger two lawyers.
"However long she wants to. I'm not going to force her to leave when she doesn't want to leave." He answers. Diane nods. "Hey, where are the others?" Will asks, he was sure Kalinda, David, Julius, Robyn and Eli would follow them to Will's, seeing as they've all been hiding at Will's when they're not working, Eli splitting his time with Alicia and HIM and the bitch, so that Peter can't badger them for information.
Diane sighs. "Kalinda went to find out what else she could about the car crash, David and Julius went to the office to update everyone on how Alicia's doing, Robyn is picking up some more stuff for Alicia then going to update Cavanaugh/Agos and Eli is with HIM and his mother." Will and Diane have never liked Peter or his mother, especially not when it came out that Peter cheated on Alicia 18 times with a hooker, and Jackie blamed Alicia for her son's cheating but after the accident that only injured them but killed Zach and Grace, the dislike turned into hatred that burns through them, through all of them.
Will and Diane join Alicia and Cary in Will's apartment, Cary is on the couch, and Alicia is nowhere to be found. "Alicia's in the shower." Cary explains as he looks at the two partners. Will nods and goes into the kitchen to make everyone coffee. He can hear the shower running but decides to give Leesh some time to herself. She needs it.
Nearly 20 minutes later, when he, Diane and Cary are watching TV with cups of coffee, Alicia comes into the living room wearing one of his Georgetown t-shirts and a pair of sweatpants, her hair a wet and tangled mess and her eyes red and swollen. She instantly settles herself into his side, in between him and Diane. Will wraps an arm around her shoulder and kisses her wet hair.
No words are spoken between the four lawyers, Alicia buries her head into his chest.
"What do I do now that I know that it's real? That I know that they're never coming home?" She suddenly asks, her voice muffled by his shirt. She sounds tired and not just physically. Will, Diane and Cary all look at each other before looking at the lawyer in Will's chest. Diane places a hand on Alicia's back and strokes it.
"We cannot imagine what you are going through, Alicia. We can't tell you what to do now because we've never been through this but we're all here for you in whatever way we can, even if it means holding you." His partner says. Cary grabs his partner's hand, looking at her.
"Diane's right, Alicia. We're all gonna be here for you." The young lawyer says. Will kisses his best friend's hair again. "And you know Will is going to be here for you, he's not going anywhere, none of us are." Diane says, shooting a smile at Will.
Alicia's eyes meet Will's. "What should I do, Will?" A small smirk spreads across Will's face as he holds Alicia's left hand.
"Firstly, do what you should have done 5 years ago, and divorce that bastard, and secondly, you can do whatever you want to do." Will says, and Alicia lets the first smile they've seen since before those two detectives came and ruined Alicia's life with just a few sentences slip onto her face as she nods. Even though she now goes by Cavanaugh and that her left hand is bare of the rings put there by Peter, and has been since she threw them out of one of the many windows in Lockhart/Gardner after she had calmed down, she's still legally married to Peter.
"Will David handle the divorce for me? I don't want to see HIM ever again. Not if I can help it." She asks, Will nods. He'll make sure that she never sees that bastard or his mother ever again if she doesn't want to, they all will.
"I'll make him do it free of charge." Will tells her before she hugs him. Will only sighs and puts his cheek on Alicia's drying hair. He, and Diane and Cary and everyone that is now close to Alicia, know that David won't charge Alicia for her divorce, not in the state she's in. And he would do it free of charge even if Will didn't make him do it, David loves Alicia.
Suddenly her cell phone, which has been laying on his coffee table since Will brought her home, rings, shattering the silence. "I'll get it, Alicia." Cary says before grabbing the device, looking at the screen and frowning.
"Who is it, Cary?" Diane asks. Cary clenches the hand not holding Alicia's cell phone into a fist, his knuckles turning white.
"Peter." The young lawyer spits in disgust. Alicia lifts her head and looks at Cary. "He's calling me?!" She growls, her eyes narrowing. Cary nods his head. "He is, do you want me to answer it or decline it?" Her second best friend, second only to Will, asks, Alicia sighs and holds out her hand for her phone. "I'm gonna answer it and rip him apart." She says with a wolfish smirk, pressing the 'answer; button on her phone, putting the device on speaker so the three other lawyers can hear.
"What the fuck do you want, Mr Florrick?" She asks, grabbing Will's hand and squeezing it.
"Where are you, Alicia? You're not at the apartment and you're not at Lockhart/Gardner or at Cavanaugh/Agos. So where the hell are you? No one will tell me." Peter asks her.
The four lawyers smile at each other. No one in either of their firms were told to keep Alicia's whereabouts from Peter when they were told that Zach and Grace had died and that it was Peter and Jackie faults or that Alicia was staying at Will's place for the foreseeable future, but it seems they did, a testament of how much Lockhart/Gardner and Cavanaugh/Agos blames Peter and Jackie for Zach and Grace's deaths. But she was sure that Eli would tell him that she was with Will, but apparently not.
"I don't need to tell you where I am, because I don't belong to you anymore." Alicia snaps.
"You're my wife, Alicia." Peter says simply. Alicia grits her teeth, a humourless laugh escaping her.
"Not anymore, Peter, I'm divorcing you and my divorce lawyer will clean you out, seeing as you killed our children." Alicia bites back, tears falling down her face at the mention of her children.
"I didn't kill our children, Alicia, we were in a car accident! A car accident killed our children, not me!" Peter yells.
"Who was driving the car? Who was drunk at the wheel? Why were Zach and Gracie even in the car at 1 am in the first place?" She's in Lawyer Mode, as Will calls it, sinking her teeth into the unanswered questions, wanting answers and no one is going to stop her from getting them.
"Oh don't lawyer me, Alicia. If you weren't with Will, then maybe our children would still be alive." Peter says smugly. Alicia closes her eyes, her grip on Will's hand becoming like iron. Impossible to break even if wanted to break, but he doesn't, she needs something to keep her grounded.
"Don't you dare blame me for our children's deaths, Peter. I was working on a huge case that required both Will and Diane. But if we're tossing the blame around: look in the goddamn mirror!" Alicia yells before she grabs the phone and ends the call without hearing Peter's reply. She throws the phone behind the couch and buries her face back in Will's chest, her body heaving with sobs once again.
Will meets Diane's and Cary's eyes, silently telling each other to help Alicia through this, no matter how long it takes.
A month or so after Zach and Grace's deaths, Alicia returns to work, diving into each and every case she takes. It helps, work. It helps take her mind off her children's deaths. Peter's lawyer is dragging out the divorce but David reassures her that he's doing everything in power to make it as easy as he can for her so that she sees as little as HIM as humanly possible.
She's still staying at Will's place, unable to step foot in the apartment, the apartment her and her two children made a home after Peter was arrested, and she's surprised that he's let her stay this long without saying anything.
She walks into Diane's office where she's speaking with Will and David. They all smile at her. "Alicia, how are you?" David asks, standing up and offering his seat next to Will. She sighs deeply, a sad smile gracing her red lipsticked lips.
"I have good and bad days, but today is a good day so far." She says, the three lawyers smile at her, Will reaches out to squeeze her hand.
"How's the divorce going, David?" She asks the man who gives Will and Diane a look.
"I'm not telling her!" Her divorce lawyer says, holding up his hands. Diane rolls her eyes.
"Well I'm not telling her." Both Diane and David look at Will, who chuckles.
"Have you met an angry Cavanaugh? No way am I telling her. I vote David, seeing as he's one who came and told us first before he told Leesh." Will says.
"Yes, but she won't kill you two if it comes from either of you. I enjoy living and I'd rather not die, not at the hands of an angry lawyer who is grieving. If it comes from you two, we'll all be alive." David argues.
"Guys!" Alicia says loudly, stopping the arguing in an instant. "Who needs to tell me what?" She asks, her eyes narrowing. The three lawyers all look at her, Will sighs. He squeezes her hand tighter and looks at her.
"Peter told his lawyer the reason Zach and Grace died were because you had an affair with me and that's where you were the night Zach and Gracie were killed. That's why they were in the car because Gracie had called Peter to pick them up." Will says, the wind is knocked out of Alicia's chest as tears fill her eyes. There are only three other people besides her who can call Grace 'Gracie' and that's Will, Diane and Cary, the three people she trusts above everyone else.
"H… he said that?" She stands up, her chest heaving with repressed sobs. Will stands up and crushes her to his chest.
She hears his heart beating in her ear which calms her down slightly. "I hate him, Will. I hate him." She says over and over again, because it's true: she hates her soon-to-be-ex-husband. She hates that he caused the deaths of their children who did no wrong.
Will kisses her hair and tightens his arms around her. "He's lying, I wasn't just with you. I was with you, Diane, Cary, David, Julius and Kalinda when the detectives came and told me of the car accident." Alicia says, pulling away from Will.
"And we're all willing to testify to that, Alicia, but Peter's lawyer is a shark." David tells her. Alicia looks at him. "Well you're a killer whale. God, this is so messed up." She mutters.
"Where is he?" She asks David who shakes his head. "Alicia, no. You can't, you know you can't." The Family Law lawyer says, knowing what she wants to do. Alicia huffs. "He lied to his lawyer about me on the night our children died!" Alicia shouts. "He has always been jealous of Will ever since he met him! When I chose Peter in college he was happy because it meant that Will was out of my life in a few short weeks, but when I asked Will to walk me down the aisle at our wedding, he became jealous again. He just hid it really, really well until I started working here." Alicia says as memories of Will walking her down the aisle float through her mind before she shakes them away, and looks at David once more, fire in her eyes, but before she can speak, Will is already turning her to face him, his hands on her shoulders, staring at her.
"Leesh, I know you want to kill Peter, we all do, but if you go to him while you're in the middle of divorcing him, this could hurt you in the long run. What will he tell his lawyer if you turn up? He's already lied and accused of you being with only me the night Zach and Gracie were killed, think about what else this could do if you go. It's not worth it. Leesh, it's not worth it." Will's voice is soft yet firm and full of the truth. Alicia sighs and nods her head. Will's right.
"So what do we do?" She asks her divorce lawyer who looks at her, a devilish smirk coming onto his lips.
"There's nothing against me and one of the others coming. I would say Will but that would only cause more trouble. Cary would kill him on sight, Kalinda doesn't want to be anywhere near him, neither does Robyn, so that only leaves Diane." The three of them look at the blonde who is smiling. "I've been waiting to have a talk with Mr Florrick for a long time." Her former boss says with a smirk. Diane stands up and follows David out of her office, giving her partner and her friend a smile as she does so.
A\N: Chapter 1 is complete! As stated above, this was a oneshot that'd been split into chapters, I hope you Angels enjoy, stay tuned for chapter 2 of the worlds we never see!