A/N: I know I have not updated any of my stories and I am so sorry. These past eight weeks have been a little rough and I had to focus on writing a paper a week. In truth this update came when I was suppose to be writing my paper for this week. oops. I hope in a two weeks when I am done with this class I can be back on regular updates. To everyone who is hanging in there with me thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I step out of the limo and quickly survey my surroundings. I feel my stomach plummet when I realize I am standing in front of Per Se. One of the leading five star restaurants with different views of Central Park. I remember there were several times that she had mentioned trying this restaurant when it first opened but I constantly blew her off. Not necessarily blew her off but refused to go with her and insisted she make it a girls night with some of her friends. It's not that I don't appreciate the finer things in life because I do but this is her life not mine. I turn to talk her out of eating here when I see the look on her face.
She is looking at me with apprehension and I realize how badly she is fearing my refusal. It is at this moment I realize how badly I have hurt her over the years. I knew when I married her that I would have to integrate into her life and I fought it tooth and nail. It's not something that she asked of me daily or weekly but at the very least monthly. How many couple dinners had she attended without me? How many times had she told them I was called into work when I was really at home? Why didn't I just put on a nice suit place a smile on my face and escorted her like I should have.
"I'm sorry" she whispers as she motions for the driver to stop before he gets too far away.
"For what" I say as I offer her my arm "I've heard nothing but rave reviews about Per Se so let's see if they are right."
The smile that crosses her face when she takes my arm is more than worth any discomfort I am about to experience. We are almost to the door when she stops me and pulls me to the side.
"I know how much you hate places like this and I'm sorry to have brought you here." She says as she adjusts the lapels of my jacket "I appreciate it the gesture of you forcing yourself to go through with it but you don't have too."
I smile at her as I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her closer to me. I lower my lips to hers and place a gentle but loving kiss on them before I pull back to stare into her crystal blue eyes.
"I've denied you this experience for far too long." I tell her as I brush my fingers through her hair "I knew when I started dating you and asked you to marry me that I had to step into this society at some point. I should have done this long before now and I am so sorry that I haven't. Starting now, I will no longer deny you this."
"You don't have…"
"I do and I should have already" I whisper as I place my finger on her lips to silence her.
She stares at me for a moment longer before she accepts what I am offering and allows me to lead her to the door. I open it and allow her to enter before following her. I suddenly feel as if I am being smothered by the air around the restaurant and I fight the urge to turn and leave. Instead I step closer to Alex and place my hand on the small of her back. The instant contact with her brings me some peace and the encouragement I need to follow through with this.
"I have reservations under Benson." She tells the maître de as she leans into my touch.
I feel my blood boil as I watch his eyes travel up and down her body. I clench my fist to fight the urge to knock him across the room. Before I have a chance to pull my fist back she leans up and kisses me on the check before placing her left hand on my chest so that her wedding set is visible.
"Can you make sure we have a private table in the back. My wife and I would like to be uninterrupted tonight." She tells him as she lays her head on my chest.
It takes all I have not to laugh at the look that crosses his face. It's a look that I often see when men approach her and she kindly tells them she's married, to me. They never expect her to be gay much less married to a woman by the likes of me. I actually find it amusing to watch their face fall when they realize it too.
"Stop gloating and come on" She whispers to me as she kisses me once again and begins to follow the maître de.
I shake my head and quickly follow behind her enjoying the view that I see. I cock my head a little to the left and unconsciously lick my lips as I watch her ass sway with every step. I am so enthralled with what I am watching and that I don't realize she has stopped and I almost run into her.
I step around her and reach for her chair before he has a chance to pull it out for her. I know its their job and he is only being polite but I have always pulled her chair out for her. Even when we were separated and she stopped at the precinct I would pull her chair out.
I make sure she is situated before I take my seat across from her and no sooner than I have sat down she has my hands in hers.
"You ok?"
"I'm starting to hurt a little but its not as bad as it has been." I tell her as I rub the back of her hands with my thumb.
"If it starts to be too much let me know and we will cut this short."
"Yes ma'am" I say with a hint of laughter in my voice as I give her a mock salute. I know she is worried about me and I appreciate it but for right now I want her to enjoy herself. I want to see the smile on her face that I failed to put there the last few years. Honestly if that takes me being in some pain it is more than worth it.