Narcissa and Draco are reluctantly introduced to their numerous Weasley cousins, Molly and the burrow are both a complete delight, Severus makes an appearance and his life is quite thoroughly turned around
Harry and Hermione felt like they were on something akin to a madly out of control sugar rush, and they knew it couldn't last forever. This business of writing secret letters to people their dad would definitely not approve of had rather grown its own feet and started walking. Their clever scheme had a built in expiration date, and they had the unenviable position of not knowing when exactly that would be.
They had really only intended to write to Gornuk at the bank with their questions, but then it only seemed right to contact Mr Weasley and let him know what was going on. And then their dad had just left that letter from Mrs Tonks laying out on the kitchen counter, and it had been so easy and fun to pick up a quill and try to sound as much like little adults as they could. It had spiraled from there, and now they had piles of letters they were trying to keep track of and not mix up.
They made their way as coolly and casually as possible out into the snow towards the little shed that served as the owlery on the compound, and were horrified to see their father leaning against the door with his arms crossed. They screeched to an abrupt and not at all casual halt a meter away from him, and he lifted a single eyebrow "Confess now and I might not tan both your hides completely raw" he growled.
Harry took a deep breath and Hermione immediately knew exactly what he was about to do. She closed her eyes, and imagined digging a hole where she was standing that she could bury herself in. She could practically hear their father's voice in her head Gonna let your beta take the fall, little alpha? And knew she had to jump on the dung bomb herself. She elbowed her brother hard and shook her head emphatically at him "No, no don't listen to him dad. We may have worked together but this was my idea"
Her father bared his teeth with a snap and a snarl like the wolf he was "And what exactly did you do?" He rasped lowly in a tone he rarely ever took with either of them. She could feel the shudder it sent through Harry's spine next to her. She held eye contact with him and mustered up all her courage.
"We've been writing letters to people without your permission. We started with the goblin at the bank, Gornuk. Then to Mr Weasley to let him know I reinstated his branch back into the Black Family… We saw your letter to Mrs Tonks and how you weren't going to let her sister meet us, so I wrote Mrs Malfoy and introduced myself. She has a son our age and the Weasleys do as well. We're all cousins and we want to meet each other, but if you're going to make us wait until school starts next year I thought we should at least be able to be pen friends" her father's face had fallen and he had paled dramatically, and she suspected she was about to be in much more trouble than she had predicted. They must have miscalculated terribly somehow.
She rushed to finish before he made any sweeping decisions "We wrote all the letters together and we were really careful not to give away any pack secrets! We never said where we live, or even mentioned Harry at all, and we told everyone we talked to that you're a good wolf and that the rumors are wrong! Please don't be mad, we were just excited to have cousins to talk to and it got out of hand and we're very sorry" she trailed off as she realized she was babbling. Her eyes darted to her brother and was distressed to see he had completely clammed up, opening and closing his mouth with nothing coming out.
Her father's teeth were clenched tight, and he took what felt like forever to collect himself and calm down enough to come over and pull her into his arms "I didn't make this home to be a prison for you. I never wanted you to feel trapped or isolated here, I wanted to protect you from a world I can't control. The world out there, I know it's big and it's interesting and there are lots of people to meet and talk to," he put his hands on her shoulders and held her at arms length, ducking his head down a bit to make very solemn eye contact.
"But it's also a world where the three of us don't have the same basic rights as other witches and wizards. Someone could kill one of us in the street and claim they were afraid for their lives, just because of what we are. The secrets I've had us keep are for a reason, they're to keep us alive. The cat's out of the bag for me, there's no helping it. But please for the love of the goddesses tell me you didn't let anyone know you're a werewolf" he begged, and she felt her blood turn to ice in her veins.
He grimaced, and she knew he understood from her reaction to the question. She forced herself to say it anyways, to confess her mistake "I told the Weasley children in our letter to them. They asked if I was and I didn't even think about it. I-I'm so sorry dad. How do I fix this?" She croaked out as fat tears started to run down her cheeks, and she began to hyperventilate even as he pulled her back into his embrace again
"What have I done, why did I tell them that? It was just so fun to write to someone new. Did I ruin everything dad?" She felt Harry's hands on her back, and she sobbed in earnest "I've never felt like this before, everyone has always known exactly what we are. Is it always going to be like this outside of our home? Being scared of people finding out? I thought we were supposed to be proud to be wolves!" He shushed her and stroked her hair softly, running a finger over the tip of one of her ears.
"Oh my little wolf, how can I be mad at you when you've learned your lesson in the hardest way there is. It's a terrible feeling to be frightened that you told the wrong thing to the wrong people. Frankly, I think we'll probably be fine. I've heard good things about the Weasleys, and I can't imagine they're the type to turn us in to the ministry. You made the best mistake you could've possibly made. You were still careless though, and it could have gone terribly wrong. I'll have to punish you. Using these birds to send mail through our wards is a privilege - one you've lost for a week" he pressed his fingertip under her chin and lifted her head up so she looked him in the eyes, and he smiled softly at her.
"But once that week is up, you'll get to visit your cousins at their house. I've gotten a letter from Molly, and we've arranged for your cousins Dora and Draco to also be there. I'm still not happy about the Malfoy boy being included, but his mother promised that he'll be on his best behavior" he said with a huff, and she laughed and threw herself at him.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Hermione was an incredibly good sport about her punishment for the entire week, never once complaining or even implying that it was the slightest bit unfair. It had helped that they had Christmas to celebrate and enjoy only a few days later. She knew she'd gotten off easy, and with a reward to boot. Harry on the other hand was a little restless, knowing that he hadn't really lost anything but feeling like he was being left out all the same. All the letters they had written together had been from his sister, and though he technically could have written to Dora himself he hadn't once the whole time they'd been sneaking about.
He approached their father the second day in "Dad, am I also forbidden from sending an owl for the week?" He asked uncertainly, not sure if that was what he really wanted to know but also not knowing how to word his real question. His father seemed to pick up on that quite clearly, and hummed contemplatively "Do you want to be?" He asked him mildly, to which he shrugged and his dad chuckled at him.
"Take a minute to really think about it. Do you actually want to write a letter to someone, and do you feel like you deserve to? I know you mostly just helped your sister with her own nefarious little plot, but you still snuck around and didn't tell me when you could have. I can say you've got the same punishment and ban you from the owl shed all week too, if you think it'll make you feel better" he said with a bit of a smug smirk he always got when he'd read one of them particularly well, and Harry scoffed and crossed his arms.
"I'm more upset realizing I didn't when I could have and not even done anything wrong. You'd have let me send a letter to Dora if I'd wanted to, right?" His dad nodded "Yes, of course. If you'd have asked me I'd have let both of you send your cousins as many letters as you liked. Your sister just gets tunnel vision and shoots for the moon. Can't believe you audacious little brats actually encouraged Mrs Weasley to contact me and somehow still thought you'd get away with it" he said with a belly laugh.
The rest of the week passed, and their dad had been gracious enough to send an owl to the Weasley children and Dora informing them that Hermione wouldn't be able to write them back again until they had their visit, and asking them not to tempt her by sending any post in the meantime. He'd even been willing to concede that it could be awkward to meet someone they didn't know for the first time in front of other kids they'd at least talked to, and had allowed them a single letter of introduction to and from their Malfoy cousin. He'd made them write it in front of him, and he'd reviewed it thoroughly before allowing the owl to take it off.
The response they had received was as brief and formal as their own message had been, but was at least polite. His name was Draco, his father worked at the ministry, he had lots of pureblood friends that were probably all going to be Slytherins. Not much of substance, Harry wasn't particularly impressed. The boy hadn't outright said it as plainly as she had, but he was clearly as excited to meet her as she was to meet him. He could respect that at least, his sister was indeed very fun and she deserved to have their cousins think so.
After a great deal of back and forth, the adults had compromised and agreed that the Tonks home would be the best place for their big family meet and greet a few days after the new year. It went unsaid that the Weasleys would be uncomfortable at Malfoy manor and that Lucius would sooner fall down dead than willingly darken the doorway of the Burrow. The Tonks lived in a modest but well kept magical home in a thoroughly muggle neighborhood, one that had never before been used to house farm animals. Compromise.
The entire Tonks family was present in their sitting room, which was still decorated festively for the holidays. Fenrir and his children were already there making pleasant if slightly stilted small talk when the fire blazed green in the hearth and Narcissa and Draco entered through the floo. She elegantly siphoned the soot away from their clothes with her wand, and made eyes at her sister desperately, unsure of how to proceed socially.
Andromeda stood and cleared her throat "Welcome Cissa, please do come in. Happy new year! And you young man, must be my nephew Draco! Let me take a look at you" she said warmly as she stepped over to embrace her sister and then inspect her nephew. He bowed towards her politely, and a pair of stifled giggles came from the couch where two children the same age as her son were sitting with a teenage girl who must be her niece. She heard the boy say "Dora whatever you do, don't try and curtsy - you'll be flat on your bum in an instant" And another giggle rang out. She forced herself not to glare at them, this was already not the best first impression and she didn't want to make it worse.
Andy rolled her eyes with a smile "Don't mind them, dear boy. You have very nice manners, if a bit old fashioned" her sister told Draco with a wink. The tips of his ears went a bit pink, but her darling boy smiled and thanked his aunt with all the graces she'd instilled in him. He turned to his cousins sitting on the sofa, and she saw his lips twitch as he visibly fought the urge to sneer at the children who had laughed at him. She suppressed a sigh - it was such an ugly expression, and she dearly wished her beloved husband hadn't taught their son that particular quirk of his.
She placed her hand on his shoulder and squeezed lightly, and he bowed his head in their direction as well "Hello, I'm Draco Malfoy and this is my mother Lady Narcissa Malfoy" he said. The girl rose from the sofa and to Narcissa's shock bowed back to him even lower than he had towards his aunt, bending fully at the waist with a flourish "Sorry if I really was supposed to, but I don't actually know how to curtsy," she said with a puckish grin on her fey little face, and Narcissa saw her cousin Hydra very plainly in the girl's features.
"It's nice to meet you Draco, and you as well Lady Malfoy. Happy new near! Thank you both for writing to me. I'm Hermione, and this is my father Fenrir and my brother Harry" she said very earnestly with a real smile, gesturing to where her family still sat. She glanced pointedly at the boy, and he crossed the room to join them near the fire. He waved in that awkward way children do at times, "Hi, nice to meet you. I'm Harry, and I helped write all the letters we sent over the last few months" he said with a sheepish smile and a childishly carefree shrug. She couldn't help but find herself somewhat charmed by them, they were much warmer than most of Draco's little society friends. Diamonds in the rough, the both of them she thought to herself absentmindedly. There were good bones there, she could work with that.
She stepped around her son and came over to stand in front of the girl, reaching out and taking her hands, leaning down until they were eye to eye. She saw the girl's father across the room perk up and frown at her, but she ignored him as best she could and cleared her throat "Miss Greyback, I want to sincerely thank you from the bottom of my heart for what you've done for my sister. I've missed her longer than you've been alive on this earth. I cannot ever begin to repay your kindness" she said as transparently and as genuinely as she'd ever said anything before, and with a real smile on her face.
The girl's gaze turned surprisingly solemn, as she replied "There's no need to thank me Lady Malfoy. Like I said in my letter, family does what's best for family. Someone should have done it long before me, but no one stepped up so I had to" she said, putting her big personality on display. Narcissa immediately felt like she had a very good idea of who this child was - she was a little girl that cared a great deal about justice, and fairness. She was a bit dazzled by her.
Her bright boy was quick on the draw, and picked up a bit of her own slack that could be blamed on emotion "How did you do it, by the way? You're a child, why didn't you just claim the heir ring?" Her son asked with genuine curiosity in his voice, that sarcastic drawling affectation he'd been practicing that last few weeks thankfully given up or forgotten. The girl blushed and fidgeted and her brother next to her had to cover his mouth to prevent himself from laughing "It was an accident really. Gornuk said to take the ring, but he didn't say which one and they were both in the same box! This is so embarrassing, I'm never going to live it down" she moaned, her hands covering her red face.
Her brother barked out a laugh and she glared at him hotly "Shut up, you saw them - they were practically identical! They should have at least been marked or in different boxes or something. It's hardly my fault" and he just laughed at her harder. Her son chuckled, and held his hands up in supplication when the girl glared at him as well "I'm sure it was an easy mistake to make" he said diplomatically.
"…Not that I've ever heard of it happening to anyone else" he muttered under his breath, and to her surprise their father laughed at that comment, shaking his head "It's always my kids the crazy shit happens to" he mumbled despairingly. Her son had broken the ice fairly well, and the mood improved significantly. She was very proud of him.
She couldn't help but let her eyes rove across the girl's face, and sighed wistfully "You truly look like a carbon copy of your mother, my dear" she told her, and the child's face lit up like a lumos. Eyes wide, she smacked her little palm to her forehead "Of course you knew her! I should have realized, but really you're lucky it didn't occur to me. The letter I sent you would have been ten pages long with all my questions" the girl said with a grin, not seeming to catch on to how heartbreaking her words were.
Bottom lip trembling, eyes threatening to water, she reached out and held the girl's hand "I knew her very well, Hydra and I were nearly the same age and she was always my favorite cousin. Ask me anything at all, at any time. I'd love to tell you about her" she said softly, trying not to crumble. The girl lunged forward and hugged her, and it forced the breath from her lungs leaving her feeling windswept.
They hastily moved out of the way as the floo activated again and a crowd of redheads poured out of it. This would be the real test.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The already improprietous noise level in the room increased by a factor far greater than the number of bodies that had entered. These people were loud, and Draco already didn't like them. They had interrupted him meeting his cousins for the first time, and he wasn't pleased about having to share them right after he'd barely gotten a chance to say hello or make a good impression.
There was an adult man, four boys, and a little girl, and every single one of them was more eye-searingly redheaded than anyone else he'd ever seen. It was garish. They weren't dirty or smelly like he'd feared, and they weren't exactly dressed in rags like his father had warned, but their clothes were shabby and worn and nowhere near as nice as his or his mother's. Whatever circumstances had resulted in their less than respectable appearances could have ultimately been forgiven, but the way they cheerfully talked over each other like excitable puppies was simply unthinkable to him. He looked desperately at his mother for guidance, who was just as stunned speechless by their wall of noise as he was.
The man cleared his throat, and raised his voice "Settle down, Weasleys!" He shouted "One at a time, Merlin's beard. Perce why don't you start us off, hmm?" He gestured to the oldest boy, who held himself stiffly and somewhat apart from his siblings. He pushed his glasses up his nose "Hello everyone, I'm Percy Weasley and I'm the third eldest after William and Charles, who are not present" he said with a bit of a condescending sniff.
The two twins stood behind him miming him quite rudely the entire time he spoke, and when he turned and noticed what they were doing he blushed furiously and swatted at them "You two are impossible!" He said angrily. Turning back around he addressed the room again "And these are Fred and George and they're not nearly as funny as they think they are" he hissed. They hissed back at their brother, less like snakes and more like geese. It was really rather amusing, and he hated that they were starting to grow on him so quickly.
The youngest boy was rolling his eyes at all three of them, and came forward to shake hands. This was the one he'd exchanged a few stilted letters with in the last week and a half, and had the highest expectations of. The boy had been rather dull on paper, but that was not always a great indicator of any substantial interpersonal shortcomings. Theo was absolute pants at letter writing but had the drollest and cleverest sense of humor of all his friends. Still somewhat shell shocked by the sheer volume, Draco mechanically thrust out his hand and allowed it to happen. "Hullo I'm Ron, and this is Ginny" the boy said, pointing to himself and then to the little girl that was half hidden behind him "She's normally the loudest of us all, I'm not sure what's got her so shy. Say hi, Gin" he encouraged kindly, nudging her gently to come out from his shadow.
The girl narrowed her eyes at her brother, but stepped around him and gave him a wave and a small smile "Hi" she said quietly. Draco couldn't help but smile at her "You remind me of my friend Daphne's little sister Astoria. If you're going to Hogwarts the year after us then she'll be a firstie with you. Maybe the two of you can meet and have a play date or two next year once we're all away" he found himself suggesting, then realized that it was actually quite a good idea. "If you ask my mother I'm sure she'd be happy to write a letter to Lady Greengrass for you" he offered, and the girl's face blossomed into a wide brilliant smile.
"Really? I've always wanted to meet other girls to be friends with. There's Luna, but her dad is absolutely nutters. I'm really excited to meet Hermione" she said, and like she'd been summoned the girl appeared before them. Hermione's smile was sincere and friendly "Hi Ginny, I've been really excited to meet you too. You can call me Nene if you like. I loved that you and all of your siblings all wrote me a letter together, we had such fun reading it!" She gushed, and Ginny grinned "I glad we did, but I'm sorry you got in trouble for it" she said without a hint of remorse "Was it too bad? The last time I got punished for something I had to clean out the chicken coop" she said, scrunching up her little face in disgust.
Draco was appalled "But what about the house elves whose job it was?" He asked without thinking, and the two girls exchanged disbelieving glances with each other "We don't have a house elf, Draco" Ginny said, and Hermione nodded in agreement "I've heard of them but I've never even seen one. I think you have to be really rich to have them" she added. This stopped him in his tracks and he looked at her askance "Hermione you're the new Lady Black. You're richer than anyone else in the entire British Wizarding Community" he said a bit unintentionally sharpish.
She had the decency to look a bit put out, and a flush rose to her cheeks "Maybe I am now, but I grew up in a cottage in the woods. My mum didn't want me to be spoiled so she left our inheritance to other people who needed it more. I guess I sort of forgot that the title came with money" she shrugged helplessly, and he could hardly parse the sentence that had just come out of her mouth. He had to sit down on the arm of the nearest chair and take a breather trying to make sense of what she'd just said.
"I don't understand" he muttered "You're a Black, and your mother was in good standing in our house. How did you grow up in the middle of nowhere knowing nothing?" She clearly took great offense to that, and her hair started sparking as she crossed her arms and snarled at him "I know lots of things! My dad did his best after my mum died, but he didn't know all the things she was supposed to teach me. He taught me what he knew, and it was more than enough to hunt and track and lead our pack and survive!" She cried angrily, starting to work herself up into a temper.
Ginny's brother finally spoke up, raising his hands up as if soothing a spooked horse "I don't think he meant it like that, Hermione. It's like how in your letter you wrote more formal than you actually speak, right? Mum's told me about how there's tons of secret protocols and stuff like that in pureblood high society that they learn how to use to communicate with each other" Ron said, gesturing towards Draco who was surprised to hear something so astute come out of the other boy's mouth.
Ron was grinning at her now "You faked it really well, but I noticed that for all you tried to sound so adult in your letter you still put a smiley face next to where you signed your name. It gave you away dead to rights. And you addressed our dad as Lord Weasley even though he's not" his eyebrows shot up as she swore colorfully, and Ron laughed "See, the other kids that were raised like him would never have made those mistakes in a million years, cause it's the tiny details that give you away and break the illusion. It all comes naturally to them cause they were raised to be perfect little aristocrats" he said, putting on airs and raising his nose as he said the last bit. Hermione and Ginny both giggled, and even Draco found himself chuckling.
"You're pretty clever" he told Ron sincerely, surprised to find that he really did mean it. They took turns sizing each other up, and exchanged grins "My grandad has been teaching me logic and chess strategy since I was in nappies. He's a Grandmaster and took the international championship title a couple times in the fifties and sixties" the other boy said with pride, and Draco was suitably impressed "We'll have to play a game some time. I learned from my godfather and he's very good and the smartest person I know, but I don't think he ever competed so you might have to go easy on me" he admitted sheepishly.
He turned back to Hermione and held his hand out, and was relieved when she shook it without hesitation "I'm sorry for not thinking through what I said better. Ron's right, there's a great deal of etiquette and social lessons that… most pureblood children start learning from a very young age. You have a noble title, and so people are going to expect you to speak and act a certain way. My mother and I can help teach you, and clearly the Weasleys have important lessons to impart as well" he said earnestly.
She nodded in acknowledgement "You've got a good point, Draco. There's a lot I never learned, and I shouldn't have gotten so defensive. I only really recently-" she looked around the room, and he saw her make eye contact with her father who frowned but then shrugged. She sighed and furrowed her brow, gesturing for him and the two Weasleys to pull in closer.
When they did, she lowered her voice "I knew things weren't great, but I only just found out recently that werewolves basically don't have any rights at all. If Harry and I weren't from important houses we wouldn't have even been able to go to school with you guys. There are other magical children in our pack that didn't get Hogwarts letters, and it's made me really sensitive about how few opportunities we have. When you said I didn't know anything, it just made me think about that and get really mad. I'm sorry for taking it out on you, Draco"
Ron and Draco both inhaled sharply as she inadvertently admitted to being a werewolf, and she winced "Yeah, I guess I just didn't realize how serious of a secret it was supposed to be. That's why I really got in trouble. When my dad found out that I told your brothers he told me about how bad it really is here for us. I had no idea it was so dangerous for people to know what we are, I've been on the compound my whole life, and everyone is like us there! It's going to be so weird trying to hide it and having people not know"
Draco desperately fought his first instinct that told him to get as far away from her as possible, to run and hide from the monstrous predator he was standing less than a meter away from. Instead he made every effort to stay perfectly still. He tried to bring himself to say something, but his mouth felt impossibly dry. He had shaken her hand, what had he been thinking? Father would definitely have told him if lycanthropy could be transmitted via handshake, wouldn't he? He glanced nervously at the other boy, and was glad to see he wasn't the only one affected. Ron was standing next to him stiff as a board.
To his monumental surprise though, the tiniest ginger fearlessly rush forward and embraced the other girl. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Ron raggedly inhale and frantically reach out to pull his sister back before freezing and putting his hand back down. The two boys exchanged wild-eyed glances. Neither of the girls seemed to notice or care though, and Ginny cooed at their cousin comfortingly "That's absolutely terrible Nene, it's just not fair! We saw what you said in the letter, but we weren't sure if you were joking or not. Fred and George never should have asked you that in the first place. We won't tell a soul, don't worry. Your secret is safe with us" the little girl told her "And mum is gonna whack the living daylights out of them for sure" she added cheerfully.
Giving himself a moment to unclench, he tried to breathe and think rationally back on all the frantic research his father had done on werewolves after finding out about Hermione. Just because she was capable of turning into a bloodthirsty ravenous beast didn't mean she could do it at will. It only happened once a month, and the full moon had been several days ago on the night of New Year's eve. The thought of a pack of werewolves howling in the new year almost certainly would have wrung a laugh out of him if he wasn't so tightly wound up and nervous at the moment. He just had to think and be objective, and consider the facts.
Everything father had found, the old books and scrolls and text fragments from old carvings, all agreed that werewolves were relatively harmless outside of the night of the full moon. When in their human forms their saliva was rendered inert and they were not contagious. Their disease could not be passed on through simple skin contact, not unless blood and teeth were specifically involved. He was fine. He was safe. She couldn't hurt them and she probably didn't want to anyways. She was a nice girl. She was his cousin.
With a start he remembered his father's warning about how sharp the senses of the werewolf were, that they were rumored to be able to hear well enough to make out other people's heartbeats. His hand rose to press against his sternum, as if to tell his own heart to shush itself. If that was true she probably knew all about the panic attack he'd nearly just had. His eyes shot towards her in mortification, and over the Weasley girl's shoulder he saw that she was starting straight back at him knowingly. Her grey eyes were so like his and his mother's and he was comforted by it until a moment later when they flashed glowing silver for a split second. He gasped, and she winked at him with a small smile playing about her lips.
Suddenly the younger girl's face scrunched up in confusion, "Hang on, did you say your brother is also from an important family? Is he not another Black like you are?" She asked completely guiltlessly, to which Hermione laughed a bit awkwardly "Oh boy, are you lot in for a surprise"
They were finishing up a lovely meal in the kitchen at the Burrow after an afternoon spent playing in the orchard. To Hermione's absolute delight, after visiting and closely inspecting the wards around the place, her father had allowed her relatively unrestricted access to visit her cousins whenever she pleased. She had thanked him what felt like a million times since he'd announced his verdict.
She and Harry had come over to visit nearly every day since, Dora had come one or twice, and even Draco had managed to convince his father to let him come join them when he wasn't busy with what Ron continued to call his "little lord lessons". Even though it was still bitterly cold out, they bundled up warmly and a great deal of their playtime took place in the air on brooms (or watching from the ground in her case). In her refusal to participate and resultant boredom, she often spent her time while they flew curled up and snoring on a blanket with a big pillow on top of it in the form of her little brown wolf.
Her cousins had been shocked to see her transform for the first time, but once their initial trepidation had worn off they'd taken turns petting her silky ears and admiring her enormous paw pads. Fred and George had nearly fallen down in their laughter when they saw her spin around before laying down like a dog would, and they'd been persistently trying to get her to perform tricks for them ever since they'd first seen her do it. She took great delight in refusing to sit or shake no matter how they begged her to.
She absolutely loved the Burrow and the land surrounding it. When she wasn't dozing under an apple tree or gamboling through the snow chasing garden gnomes, she was firmly attached to Molly's hip like a little barnacle. There were children in their pack and there were women, and there were even a few mothers with children. But Molly was openly and happily a mumsy mum in a deeply maternal way that none of the wolf mothers she knew had ever allowed her in close enough to see. They were perfectly kind and friendly, but they saved that side of themselves for the privacy of their own homes and the company of their own children.
Molly truly delighted in cooking and baking for her family, nearly luxuriated in it. The woman was soft and warm and kind, and though she'd been raised knowing love and affection, this was something she'd never quite experienced before. She hadn't realized she'd been craving it until she was exposed, and she felt as if she'd do nearly anything to stay with her and be her little helper and get to bask in her attention. She could tell she was being very obvious, but if Molly noticed she'd very kindly not said a word about it. She couldn't believe the Weasley children had such an amazing mum who loved them more than anything and they'd rather go play outside on stupid brooms. She'd gladly pick up the leftovers of what she felt they were wasting.
In the week since their first visit Molly had taught her how to bake Christmas cookies and gingerbread, they'd made cakes and pies and tarts together. Even as a being that on average got half again or more as hungry as the average human, it was still a bit astonishing to see one woman cook such bountiful meals for her family. She explained to her as they spent time together that food was her love language, and the way she communicated to people that she cared about them.
She'd also started teaching her to knit, which was much more difficult. Hermione had been easily able to help out in the kitchen, more than willing to fetch things and cut things and clean up afterwards, lift heavy bags of sugar and flour. Though she was quite coordinated she always seemed to get into a tangle of yarn no matter how hard she tried to concentrate and keep her needles organized, and she felt like she'd be able to put them to better use as weapons than crafting tools, but Molly was endlessly patient. Apparently Ginny had never really gotten the hang of it either, and that soothed her wounded ego a bit.
As she struggled to put together a single lumpy tea cozy, the woman seemingly effortlessly produced scarves and mittens and jumpers and socks and hats. She was beyond touched when Molly had presented her with a beautiful heather grey jumper with a large chocolate brown H on the front and a tiny line of little brown wolves running along the hem. It was softer than any of her other sweaters, the yarn was heavy weighted and felt like chenille. It was wonderfully warm and very comfortable - in fact it had fit her so perfectly she had wondered how Molly had guessed her size, and the woman had sheepishly admitted to owling her father and asking for her measurements.
That evening as dinner drew to a close, one of the twins eyed her suspiciously "If you're both werewolves, how come you can turn into one whenever you want and he can't?" He asked pointedly. Their mother was clearly mortifiied, her eyes had widened and her cheeks had turned pink. Hermione laughed at her brother as Harry grumbled "He's been asking me the same thing since we were six years old! It's because he was turned into a wolf, while I on the other hand was actually born as one" she said with her hand on her chest and a smug smirk taking over her face. She grinned and held out her other hand palm down for the twin to take "Observe" she said.
Without any strain or effort, a green shimmer flowed down her arm and swirled over her hand, and a teensy weensy razor sharp claw popped out of each nail bed where a human fingernail used to be. She flexed the muscles in her hand and clacked the long claws noisily against the tabletop. She lifted her lips up to the gums and her magic shifted again and her canine teeth grew dramatically in length and sharpness. She chomped the air in front of her playfully, and the snap of her teeth meeting rang out in the silent room. It had taken her years to master this partial transformation so smoothly, and she was very proud of it.
No one said a single word, and after a moment she realized everyone was staring at her very intently. She suddenly felt incredibly self conscious. Her face fell and she pulled her hand back away from her Weasley cousin. She grabbed her brothers hand and held it tightly, and started to backpedal "I always thought it was… pretty cool. But maybe it's not" she mumbled through her enlarged teeth, and felt foolish. She shouldn't have said or done a thing, of course humans would be scared of something so new and dangerous looking. She let her magic pull her claws and fangs back in and began to stammer "I- I'm sorry… I didn't mean to scare you. I'd never bite anybody that didn't want it. I'm a good wolf, I promise" she said pleadingly, as her eyes and nose began to burn.
A soft warm hand touched her shoulder lightly, like a little bird on a branch. She looked up and was surprised to see Molly crouching next to her with a sad smile on her face "You have nothing to apologize for dearie. My extremely rude son who wouldn't know how to be polite if the queen herself sat down and taught him, is the one who should be apologizing for asking such an invasive question in the first place. We appreciate that you felt comfortable enough to share that with us. It's different, and we've certainly never seen anything like it before! Not scary though, you're just too cute to be scary aren't you?" The woman said sweetly, pinching her cheek and tapping the end of her nose.
As she felt the tears in her eyes start to fall of their own volition, she threw herself into the woman's arms and tried to cry as quietly as possible "Thank you Mrs Weasley" she said a bit nasally, her nose all stuffed up and congested. She sniffled and felt her brother rub her back as the woman's arms wrapped around her and hugged her tight. It was one of the best hugs she'd ever had and she told her as much, to the woman's clear delight "Aren't you such a sweet little thing?" The woman crooned into her hair, and she felt very safe and comfortable.
As she pulled back and tried to hide her face and surreptitiously use her sleeve to wipe away the evidence of her tears, Molly tutted and pulled her face back into view and used the edge of her own apron instead "It's okay little love, nothing a good cry can't fix" she whispered. Her face changed dramatically as she turned to look at her son who had caused all this drama "And what do you have to say to Hermione, Frederick Gideon?" She demanded with a venomous glare, as he stood there stunned.
He quickly cleared his throat and came to his senses, though his face was still pale "I'm sorry little cousin, I was just curious. I suppose it wasn't very nice of me to ask you a question like that" a small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth "I'll save all my werewolf related questions for future letters" he mouthed at her smartly, just loud enough for her to hear and his mother not to. She winked at him and he and his twin both mimed doubling over in laughter. What a pair of silly clowns.
She looked over to smile at her brother, and was dismayed to see a frown on his face "What?" She mouthed at him, starting to feel a bit anxious again "What is it?" His eyes darted to Molly and then back to her, and he tilted his head down so no one else could see his lips moving "You know you can show her that part of yourself, right? It's clear she adores you, she's not gonna suddenly get freaked out" he huffed under his breath, too low for anyone else in the room but her to pick up. She stiffened in embarrassment, feeling a bit caught out. She had hoped he wouldn't have noticed or at least would have had the decency not to mention that she'd kept her transformations strictly outdoors with the other children. It wasn't that she necessarily thought Molly would reject her in her wolf form, but she'd rather not wanted to find out if she was wrong about that. Her brow furrowed, and she wasn't sure what to say. "If you don't ever give her your trust, how can she ever prove her own" he whispered again, echoing one of Ófnir's most frequently repeated aphorisms.
With a whine low in her throat she pressed her forehead to his and closed her eyes, breathing in his scent that reminded her of their shared den and father "You really are going to be a good beta someday" she told him softly, to which he smiled and his cheeks became rosy. He gestured towards Molly, and Hermione nodded and slid off of her chair and to her knees next to the woman who had gotten back up into her own seat.
She looked up at her and tugged on the woman's hand, putting it against the side of her head and letting her transformation flow over her in a wash of green shimmery sparks. Molly's eyes widened in wonder, and though she gasped and brought her other hand up to her breast, she didn't pull her hand away from where it rested on the ear of the little brown wolf that sat docilely at her feet. Her eyes watered, but no tears fell "Oh you brave girl, you really are a sweet thing" she breathed out with a shaky smile, as she stroked her fingers through the fur of her muzzle. She let out a sudden laugh "Whiskers! You've got whiskers, oh my goodness me! Do they help you to see better in the dark? I've been so curious, the children have been talking about this other form of yours nonstop but you just didn't seem ready to show me yet. I'm so glad you did dearie, what a lovely little wolf you are" she said warmly, her eyes and smile soft as the chenille of the jumper she had made her.
This seemed to break the rest of the children from whatever spell had kept them silently glued to their seats, and they rushed over and crowded around the two of them. Molly narrowed her eyes and her angry voice came back out that she thankfully hadn't yet had cause to take with her and hopefully never would "Now you lot have gotten to have her all to yourselves this whole week, at least let the two of us have a proper hello first!" She barked at her children, and Hermione howled out a yowling laugh that made the other children fall down laughing.
She heard her brother start to answer Molly's question seriously, and she so appreciated him in that moment that she reached up on her hind legs and licked all over the side of his face. He was so used to this he didn't even blink or stop what he was saying "-and our eye sight is actually quite good, especially at night because we have a special reflective layer in our eyes. It's called Tapeta Lucidum, but you might have heard it referred to as eye shine. So the whiskers help more with like, generally knowing where you are and what's around you. Dad calls them a sensory organ, but I'm not sure exactly what that means, all I know is they're just as important as our ears or nose or eyes. Hermione would have a much better answer because she's a swotty thing who's read a million books and spends more time in her form than any of the rest of us" he said rolling his eyes good naturedly.
She woofed at that and nipped his ear, causing him to push her head down away from him, and she whined and sat mulishly on the floor with her paws over her snout and eyes. When she opened her eyes both of the twins were under the table with her on their bellies, mimicking her posture with mischief sparkling in their eyes. She crawled a bit closer to them on her belly, and they did the same until they were nearly touching noses. They breathed in fast and shallowly through their noses, pretending to sniff her.
Her nose twitched and she snuffled and actually took in deep whiffs of their scents; the dinner they'd just had, the family smell all the Weasleys shared, the grubby cheesy smell of preteen boy, broom twigs and other outdoor smells, a faint lingering hint of something sharply spicy and metallic… gun powder? She reared back - whatever it was also had a terrible underlying fecal smell mixed in with it. What on earth had they been doing? Making… poop bombs??? She put that thought away and saved it for later, eagerly looking forward to having something to hold over them.
She laid her head back down flat on the floor and wiggled forward as close as she could get, licking first one then the other across their noses. They made brief eye contact with each other, and one of them stuck his own tongue out and licked her nose back. She was so surprised she had no idea how to react to that, and after a moment of delay she batted him on the top of his head lightly with her paw, and whuffed. He looked thoroughly startled, and his twin laughed at him.
After being caught red handed and punished for it within such recent vivid memory, Hermione had made one of her resolutions for the new year to allow her father to personally inspect every piece of correspondence that left the desk of Lady Black in any official capacity. For his wise guidance and peace of mind, but also her own continued freedom to use the pack post owls. She was regretting that now, as he read through the letter she'd brought him. She shuffled her feet anxiously, and wrung her hands.
As he read through it his eyebrows raised higher and higher until they were nearly brushing his hairline, and when he finished it he stared at her in incredulous disbelief. He wheezed a hysterical laugh and shook his head "I can't believe I'm saying this and I'll deny it if you ever tell anyone, but for as much trouble as it brings me, your absolute gall has probably got to be one of my favorite thing about you, little wolf… the things you'll do as alpha one day - I can't even imagine!" He said with another breathless chuckle "And where on earth did you get the idea to do a thing like this, from another one of those old stories Remus told your brother that you eavesdropped on?"
She smiled at him a bit smugly "Yes I did, and thanks dad - I happen to think it's one of my best traits as well. That and my resilience of spirit. Anyways, I heard them talking about it and realized I couldn't not do something. I feel a bit bad about going behind Remus' back, but this is someone who's going to be in a position of authority over Harry and I soon, and I need to protect both of us by making things square with him. From what I heard, he's a very unpleasant man. I might have to make more of an effort than this, but it should at least let him know I'm serious" he nodded in approval, and she continued.
"Also, whether he's our teacher or not, there's another important factor to consider. He's a person who's had an awful experience with a werewolf, and has most likely sustained a fear and prejudice towards us because of it. If I'm going to be away from home, I need to be an ambassador for our people. Laying the groundwork with him will be my first major project. We aren't like what he saw, and he needs to be shown that. Even one less person who hates us is worth working for" she finished passionately, her fists clenched at her sides.
Her father scratched at the scruffy stubble on his chin, and looked at her with a glimmering sheen of unshed tears in his eyes "Goddesses be good but I'm awfully proud of you, my girl. I really am, Hermione. Every time I think you just couldn't be better, your kindness and compassion always simply astound me all over again" he said, beaming at her with the biggest smile she'd ever seen on his face. She threw herself into his arms, laughing in delight and pressing kisses all over his face.
"I know you're a frightfully clever little sprog, but how on earth did you manage to sound so mature? I'd never in a million years have guessed a child wrote this" he pressed curiously, to which she blushed and pulled out of her pocket his mate's ancient dog-eared old copies of Dracula and Pride and Prejudice that had lived untouched on the nightstand next to his bed for nearly a decade. She ducked her head, and pressed her forehead to his chest "Got some help from mum" she mumbled, and he bussed a kiss into her hair "I'm sure she's glad she could help" he replied, trying desperately not to choke on his words.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Severus ran his fingertips lightly over the thick expensive card stock of the envelope on his desk. The last time he'd gotten anything nearly so fancy in the mail had been an invitation to a Malfoy gala at the height of the war. His attendance at such events was no longer required, but there had been a time when it was absolutely mandatory, and the invitations had been entirely for show. Dress up and dance or risk offending the Dark Lord and have your life forfeit.
The wax seal holding it closed was flat and bore no crest, which was unusual and had given him pause. The types who shelled out for such opulent stationary generally wanted their audience to know exactly who was addressing them as soon as they held the letter in their hands. Was it a show of arrogance, or humility? He wasn't yet sure. It was beautiful paper, but slightly darker off-white than the currently reigning nobles of wizarding Britain tended to use, and allowed him to immediately rule out a great deal of possible senders by that clue alone.
Hesitantly, he brought it up to his face and wafted it below his nose. No recognizable scents added, no musky colognes or noxiously cloying perfumes sprayed upon the envelope itself that could be detected from the outside, although a good charm could feasibly hide that if it had been applied to only the parchment inside of it. There was something earthy that he just barely caught a hint of, but he couldn't identify what it was and his gut instinct told him it was natural and had not been applied intentionally.
Finally, he pulled out his wand and began casting his usual array of diagnostic spellwork on the letter. There were no curses hexes or jinxes attached to it, though there was a mild standard mail charm to keep it clean dry and uncrumpled. It was totally free of dark residue, not a hint of malicious or hostile magic had ever been cast anywhere remotely near it. He decided that it was safe to open and peruse, but remained on his guard.
Summoning a sharp little knife from his work station across the room, he sliced open the envelope and pulled out the pages of parchment. They were tidy, and to his great surprise were numbered. A little on the anal retentive side, but something he often did himself. The penmanship was neat, but he noticed that it was slightly too uniform to be hand written, and suspected it had been dictated with a particularly well programmed auto-quill. He stopped short at the name at the bottom of the last page, and nearly threw it in the fireplace without even reading it.
…But something told him he had to see what this letter had to tell him. He found himself instantly suspicious at that feeling, and angrily checked the parchment for compulsion charms or behavior modifying spells. To his consternation there were none. He would simply have to read it if he wanted to sate his own curiosity. He began to occlude heavily for safety's sake, and his guard was up as he read.
January 25th, 1991
From the desk in my room
Alpha House
Greyback Compound
In the woods
Dear Mr Severus Snape,
I hope this letter finds you well. I write to you today as a show of good faith, to begin making up for a grievous wrong that was done to you by a son of my family. On behalf of the House of Black, I would like to extend to you a sincere formal apology for the actions of Sirius Orion Black at Hogwarts School in 1976. As the new head of our house, I was shocked to discover that this matter had been left neglected of any official action on our part for decades. It is my understanding of the situation that he not only intentionally endangered your life, but was also never suitably punished for it in any meaningful way. I do not know him and have not spoken with him, and thus I do not know if he ever personally apologized to you, but I hope he did just as much as I hope he eventually came to regret his behavior.
I find this entire matter to be a reprehensible display of poor judgment and lack of discipline all around, both in his actions and in the way they were handled. While I have no wish at all to buy you off or imply that your life has a set value, I am of the opinion that you deserve to be compensated for the very real crime that was committed against you and any suffering you may have endured since. I have contacted my accounts manager at Gringotts and he has informed me of an appropriate wergild for such an attempt against your life, given the motive and how close Sirius came to ultimately succeeding.
I have seen fit to ensure that the amount will be available for you to collect at the bank should you desire to do so. I had considered asking Gornuk to simply transfer the funds directly to your account, but he argued that such a presumptuous move may be offensive to you. If this offer indeed offends you in any way, you are by no means obligated to accept it, and are more than welcome to simply ignore this missive altogether. If you have not collected it within a month of receiving this letter, it will be automatically placed in a trust in your name should you ever at any point change your mind and decide to claim it.
Another important matter I wish to address are the facts of what you actually witnessed. Mr Lupin is an acquaintance of myself, and it was from him I indirectly heard of the events of that dreadful night. I beg nothing more from you Mr Snape than that you read the following with an open mind. You see, Mr Lupin's condition was passed to him via my father Fenrir Greyback, a politically motivated mistake he made only once and never again, despite rumors otherwise.
As a werewolf bitten against his will and fearful of his own condition, Mr Lupin has no ability to control either his shift or his mind while under the full moon. Although popular mythology would paint us all as similarly slavering beasts who attack with bloodlust, this is in truth a rarity of our species that only the lone wolf tends to exhibits signs of. Historically speaking, attacks from werewolves have almost always exclusively been from loners who do no belong to a pack, and when we find them within our territories we often take care of them ourselves.
Werewolves are highly social and form large packs with a fairly familial structure. When we are balanced within ourselves and at peace with our wolves, the full moon's light brings a painless and controlled change where we spend our nights running and hunting playfully, nearly indistinguishable from true wolves. We are predators, but we do not instinctually seek to harm humans, and in fact we do our best to live in isolation as far away from them as possible. We stick to our own territories, and we live on heavily warded and highly sustainable compounds.
I tell you this not to propagandize, but to express that I am greatly saddened that you had such a genuinely dangerous and terrifying experience. I cannot imagine what fear and hatred of our species such an encounter may have inspired, and it would be entirely justified given what you've been through. I have immense sympathy for both yourself and Mr Lupin, who were both traumatized by this event in entirely different ways. As a young man who already hated and feared his own nature, for him this event could only possibly have reinforced such self-loathing, compounding it infinitely greater. I cannot imagine the pain that would come from being used as a murder weapon by your own best friend.
All of this is to say that what happened was a tragedy all around, and I reiterate that I am deeply ashamed of the actions taken by a member of my house. I bear no misapprehension that this gesture will heal all wounds, but I only hope it can begin to soothe the very worst of them. If there is ever anything that you require, please reach out and I will do my best to see it done. Needless to say, if you have any further questions I am willing to answer any and all of them. I am additionally willing to make a formal statement to both the wizengamot and the press offering you an official apology, but do not wish to do so without first obtaining your consent.
If I don't hear back from you, I look forward to seeing you at Hogwarts in September. Please try and have a restful summer, I'm sure you will have well earned it after teaching for another year :)
(Should you find yourself doubtful of my character or intentions please contact your colleague Minerva Mcgonagall, whom I recently had the pleasure of making the acquaintance of and whom I believe should be willing and able to vouch for me if need be)
Kindest regards,
Hermione Elena Greyback
The Lady Black
"What the bloody buggering fuck" he whispered aloud to his classroom, and a frog croaked loudly in a tank along the wall in answer.
He read the letter all the way through three more times, and kept coming back to the last line. She would see him at Hogwarts? There were no current students that he knew of who could have claimed the Black seat, and this letter could not possibly have been written by a ten year old child. Both statements were to his knowledge true, but together they presented an impossible scenario. Unless the new Lady Black was an adult who was going to be one of his fellow teachers… But Albus had already informed them all that cowardly quivering lump Quirinus was coming back to take over the defense position this year, which meant that there shouldn't be any new staff members he didn't know.
He inspected the letter again, more closely than he had before. The last line, it had ended with a smiley face. What adult did that? The heading at the top, it was addressed from "the desk in my room" Adults had their own offices or studies, which noble ladies sometimes referred to as solars. She had even mentioned her father in the letter, and he had never heard of Greyback having children before or during the war.
The tone was formal, and they had used a great many large and complex words in the correct context. Propagandize, misapprehension, indistinguishable, reprehensible. They had even mentioned the wizengamot and referenced correspondence with a bank manager about archaic compensatory practices. He briefly wondered how degrading the pittance would be that the goblin attaché had come up with in an attempt to placate him. Though she had claimed not to want to ascribe a monetary value to his human life, giving him money in payment for nearly being killed was essentially doing exactly that.
Putting that thought aside for later and doubling down on his occlusion, he was forced to come to the uncomfortable conclusion that this letter had indeed been written to him by a child. An extremely clever and sneaky child, but a child all the same. All the clues pointed towards it, and the use of the auto-quill tied it all together. Even the brightest children still had very distinctive handwriting. She hadn't outright claimed to be an adult, but might as well have. He wondered how much help she'd had writing the letter, if any. She'd probably read an old epistolary collection, the tone matched.
He'd barely gotten around to considering the actual content and the gargantuan implications of a Black holding one of their own accountable for his sake, when a little Hogwarts elf popped up next to him "There is being another delivery for the potions master, sir" it said, bowing and placing yet another letter on his desk before softly popping away again.
He picked it up hesitantly, casting the same spells he just had on the other. This one was clean as well, but had substantially more robust mail charms. It was from Gringotts. He opened it and read, and as he did his jaw dropped inelegantly.
25th of Æfterra Gēola, 1991
Office of Black Accounts
Gringotts Bank, Diagon Alley
London, England
Mr Severus Tobias Snape,
I am writing on behalf of my patroness, the Lady Black. In light of discovering an attempt on your life was made by a member of her house, that you were never compensated, and that the assailant was never punished accordingly, she has decided that she owes you a formal wergild. As her financial advisor, taking into account all known factors regarding the crime that was committed, including time passed since and the fact that you are still among the living, as well as your current career prospects and earnings, I arrived at an actuarial estimate in the amount of 30,000 galleons as an appropriate reparation.
Upon presenting this number to her she dismissed it summarily, and insisted on paying no less than 55,000 galleons. She seems to believe your life has a great deal of value. (For your convenience, at current market value and with today's exchange rate and rate of inflation, this is equivalent to 275,000 British pounds)
Per the Lady Black's kind and generous instructions, this sum will be available for you to collect at any teller station in the bank for one calendar month starting today, after which it shall be invested in a trust vault in your name which will accrue an annual interest rate of 2.89% in perpetuity. The vault has been pre-approved to be grandfathered to your surviving heir should it be claimed posthumously.
In service of the House of Black,
Gornuk son of Nograk
"…Jesus fucking wept" he announced to his empty classroom, in a daze. He felt a bit lightheaded. The parchment fluttered from his hand onto the surface of the desk. He pushed his chair back and leaned back as far as he could go, his hands reaching up to run through his hair. He tried to remember his maths, and what a galleon was worth in pounds. It was something like one to five.
He made roughly six and a half thousand galleons a year, which was thirty two thousand pounds. Standard educator's salary, not too shabby but certainly not glamorous. Fifty five thousand galleons, or two hundred and seventy five thousand pounds, was nearly eight and a half years worth of wages at his current salary. He could quit today, and that would be close to a decade where he could do fuck all but his potions experiments if he wanted to. All because of one scary night he'd had a big fussy strop about at age sixteen.
Gods but that was so much fucking money. He picked up the bank statement to read it again, certain he must've misread the numbers, it had probably just said 2,750 pounds. He moaned in dismay as he confirmed that it did in fact say exactly what he'd thought. He was quite confident it was several times more than his house was worth. What business did a child have handing him a blank check? Had it really been her idea or had someone put it in her head? And what on earth did he think about the second half of her letter where she had rhapsodized for pages about the werewolf condition? Could a werewolf even be trusted to provide impartial information about their own monstrous nature?
Then again - what did he care? He could happily forgive and forget for that much money. He didn't give two shits, for that much money he'd be perfectly content to keep an open mind like the girl had asked him to. What had the goblin called her, his patroness? He could have an eleven year old werewolf aristocrat patroness. Why the fuck not, his life was already so goddamn weird.
He'd been passed around from father to dark lord to headmaster, he'd never really been free a day of his life. Every single one of them had wanted something from him. None of them had ever wanted a damn thing to do with him until he had first proven himself useful. At least having a child as his new lord and master would probably be interesting. At least this one seemed to consider his human life innately valuable for more than simply what he knew or could provide. It might actually make a refreshing change of pace.
Tossing back a good three fingers of the scotch Minerva had given him for his birthday earlier in the year, he scrambled to find parchment and quill before his better judgment kicked in and stopped him. Frantic, he scratched out a response as quickly and as eloquently as he could, but found himself opening up much more than he intended to. He felt almost compelled to let this young woman know his side of things, comforted by the strange sense of responsibility and propriety she'd already displayed in reaching out to him. Merlin knew no one else had ever stepped up to do right by him. Overcome and out of his depth, he sealed it and rushed off to the owlery in a billow of his long black robes.
16/3/91
From the Desk of S. Snape
Office of the Potions Master
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
Near Hogsmeade, Scotland
Lady Black,
I thank you for the apology. It means more to me than you can possibly know.
I have carried so much helpless anger since that night, with nowhere to direct it. You have given me all I ever really wanted out of this situation - for someone to tell me that my life meant something. That what he did was wrong, and that he could have killed me, and that it would have mattered if he had. I admit to having possessed a cruel curiosity, I suspected Lupin and wanted to know what secret he was hiding. It got the better of me, and I allowed Black's taunts to lure me almost to my own death. It has taken a very long time for me to acknowledge the guilt I bear, and I don't think I ever would have come to fully realize it had someone such as yourself not reached out to me with compassion and shown me the dignity and respect that you have.
All I remember hearing in the aftermath of the incident was how very important it was that I not spread Lupin's secret about, as if his comfort and privacy was easily worth as much or more as my life that had been risked in the process of me learning about it. I was made to feel like utter scum, because while Black's friends were furious with him it was clear they were more upset that he'd risked exposing their friend than endangering my life. The headmaster threatened to make me swear an unbreakable vow to never reveal Lupin's secret, he said he'd have to consider expelling me if I refused.
Only Lupin stepping up and telling him it wasn't necessary saved me from that indignity. I had never considered until now to be grateful to him for that. It was just another thing for me to be furious about - that his whim had saved me from being bound to potentially die if I revealed his secret. It felt like my life was at risk twice that night, first from a werewolf and then from the man who was supposed to protect me from it. It felt like my life had been saved only to find out it could be taken away at any time if I didn't earn the right to live.
I spent the entire rest of my seventh year occluding constantly whenever I had to be in their presence, putting up mental barriers to keep myself in control and my temper in check. The fear I felt of swift and brutal retaliation from his friends should I dare speak word of Lupin's condition was tantamount to the paralyzing terror of actually seeing him transformed within arm's reach, wild and vicious and lunging towards me with clear intent to kill.
I have never spoken about this with another living soul, it has until now been too painful and too raw edged a wound to even bear thinking about other than to rage and to seethe silently. I regret to say that I have frequently taken out my pain on those around me, and have been a generally unpleasant man to be around. In my misery I've been needlessly cruel to others who had no hand in hurting me.
I desperately wish to believe that what you have revealed to me is the truth, that what I saw was an outlier and not the norm. That there are entire fey communities of werewolves as happy and as harmless as the Hogwarts house elves. What you have described to me sounds as beautiful and far fetched as an impossible utopia, or a child's lovely dream of a perfect world. I have never in my life heard anyone refer to werewolves as a species distinct from humans, only ever at worst as dark creatures to defend against, or perhaps at best as the diseased who must be pitied and put out of their misery.
Though I doubt my own capacity to unlearn what I know, I appreciate your willingness to teach me that the world may be different than I thought it was, better than I realized. I find myself eager to teach you potions come September, and I look forward to seeing you in my classroom. If you are as clever and sneaky as I suspect, you may even be sorted into my house
Severus Snape
Professor of Potions
Head of Slytherin House