An Ace In The Hole
Chapter Two: Mad As A March Hare
Robin had just returned from his midnight rounds feeling quite good about himself. He had thwarted two robberies and even came out on the plus side of a quick encounter with Catwoman. She had gotten away, but not with the purse of diamonds that she had just lifted from a jewelry store. So while he wasn't expecting something like a congratulations or anything from his mentor, he sure wasn't expecting a stone cold reception.
"What did I do this time?" asked Robin, approaching the desk where Bruce sat stone faced.
"I don't know." retorted Bruce. "What did you do?"
"Hey, I may not have been able to apprehend Catwoman, but at least I recovered the jewels!" retorted Robin defensively.
"Catwoman is the least of our worries." said Bruce, typing something on his computer. "You said that the Joker's young apprentice, Ace, disappeared two weeks ago."
"Yeah, but you said you weren't interested." said Robin, removing his mask.
"I wasn't – till now." said Bruce, scratching his chin.
"What's going on?" asked Robin.
"The Joker and Harley have disappeared and someone matching Harley's description was seen in London by Rip." replied Bruce. "He lost track of her in the inner city."
"What's that got to do with that little magician?" asked Robin, leaning on the desk.
"Harley's father was from London and so is this Ace." retorted Bruce. "I've long believed that he is Harley's nephew. His disappearance was meaningless until the Joker disappeared as well. There are things that the likes of the Joker can never be allowed to get a hold of, and Ace may be there to retrieve them for him."
"You're not going to tell me what you're talking about, are you?" asked Robin, smirking.
"Only if absolutely necessary." replied Bruce.
"So does this mean – "
"It means," interrupted Bruce "that my recovery time has been cut short. I'll need you to continue to watch over Gotham for me while I'm gone."
"So who's headed to London?" asked Robin. "Bruce Wayne or Batman?"
"Both." replied Bruce, rising to his feet.
When the train conductor announced that the train would be pulling into the station soon, Harry mused over how excited his little bookworm was getting.
"Luna and I need to change into our school robes and uniforms before we reach the station." said Hermione, glancing at the door.
"Okay. We'll cover our eyes." retorted Harry innocently. "We promise we won't peek. Right Nev?"
Neville turned a deep shade of red and Luna giggled.
"I don't think so." replied Hermione, blushing slightly. "Besides, it wouldn't be proper."
"Oh well," sighed Harry "can't blame a guy for trying. Come on Nev."
Harry and Neville stepped out into the corridor and waited for Hermione and Luna to change. The train leaned ever so slightly as it turned another bend, causing Harry to smirk as he wondered to himself if the train had ever derailed before. He figured that there were magical spells in place to prevent that from happening, but he'd have to ask Hermione about it later.
"While we wait," said Harry, leaning lightly on Neville's shoulder "I need to ask you something."
"S-Sure Harry." said Neville, still not use to Harry's antics. "You can ask me anything."
"You and Hermione are in the same year and the seem to be good friends, right?" asked Harry casually.
"Uh yeah." replied Neville. "Hermione is one of the few mates I have."
"Mates – as in friends, right?" asked Harry, raising his eyebrows slightly.
"Uh yeah… I mean, that's what we call our friends round here." replied Neville, frowning at Harry. "What are you suggesting, Harry?"
"Oh nothing really." retorted Harry. "Just wondering if you might think she's, ya know, attractive or anything."
"Who, me?" scissored Neville, turning bright red. "I've never… I mean, not Hermione."
"But there is someone." retorted Harry slyly.
"N-Not in our house." said Neville smiling, his face blood red now. "She's in Hufflepuff." Neville gasped, "Promise you won't tell!"
"No worries, Nev." replied Harry, winking. "I'm real good at keeping secrets."
The compartment door opened and Hermione welcomed them back inside. Harry and Neville had boarded the train already wearing their school robes and uniforms, thus did not need to change. Harry noted that Luna was wearing a set of plain black robes like his.
"Kinda morbid, don't ya think?" mused Harry aloud.
"What's morbid?" repeated Hermione.
"Oh nothing really." replied Harry. "It's just – while I get that Luna and I will be getting fancy new emblems for our robes – the whole black theme seems a bit like going to a funeral or something."
"Well, what color would you choose for your robes if they gave you a choice?" asked Hermione.
"Either purple or yellow." replied Harry.
"Yellow?" repeated Neville. "Why yellow?"
"It's the perfect mixture of green and red." replied Harry smiling.
"I think that yellow robes sound lovely, Harry Quinn." said Luna dreamily.
"It would be total chaos if students were allowed to wear whatever color pleased them." said Hermione.
"Well, I guess that black robes are for the best." sighed Harry dramatically. "They fit my reserved personality."
At this, Neville snorted as he laughed then looked around uncomfortably. Harry could tell that it wasn't normal for Neville to enjoy himself. He looked as though laughing felt awkward to him. Harry would definitely change that.
When the train finally arrived in Hogsmeade Station, Harry followed Hermione off of the train and into a scene from a Grimm's fairytale he had once read. Diagon Alley had been bizarre enough, but this place was so far from anything he had ever seen in Gotham that it made him question his decision.
"It's one of the few all magical villages left in Britain." said Hermione, misunderstanding Harry's expression as one of awe.
"Great." moaned Harry sarcastically. "That means, no TV, no electricity, no phones, or modern marvels of any kind. Like one giant solitary."
"Oh I think you'll find many things to keep a Muggleborn like yourself busy." said a pompous voice behind him.
Harry turned to see a tall red-haired boy standing behind him; an arrogant look upon his face. His features reminded him of the other red-haired boy he had met earlier on the train. As he looked the boy over, he noticed a shiny badge attached to his robes with the letter 'P' at its center.
"Allow me to introduce myself." said the older boy, extending his hand. "My name is Percy Weasley. I am a sixth year and a Gryffindor Prefect."
"Well hello." said Harry, smirking as he shook his hand; his eyes dancing devilishly at the thought, 'Another Weasley'. "The name's Harry Quinn. I'm new here, but you'll find I'm a fast learner."
"Excellent." said Percy. "Hope to see you in Gryffindor. Excuse me, but I must find someone."
Harry turned back around to find Hermione, Neville, and Luna staring at him.
"So, will it be Quinn that you'll be going by?" asked Hermione.
"For now." sniffed Harry. "It's been my name for as long as I can remember, so why change it now? Besides, the name Potter seems to draw too much attention."
A voice bellowed over the crowd, "First yers over here! First yers this way!"
Harry looked up to see a monster of a man holding a lantern high in the air.
"Well, I guess I'll see you all later." said Luna, sounding sad.
Harry looked around. Dumbledore hadn't been specific as to what he should do once he got there.
"Not certain what I'm supposed to do." said Harry.
"Well, you're not technically a first year, but you still need to be Sorted." interjected Hermione.
Seeing the look on Luna's face helped him make his decision.
"Well, it looks as though I'm off to follow the jolly giant!" said Harry, a manic expression covering his face.
Luna beamed with happiness as she and Harry waved bye to Hermione and Neville. Harry watched as his new comrades made their way up a trail to his right. He, Luna and a small group of first years followed the large man down a path into the woods. He knew that he remembered this scene from a movie he'd once watched with Harley – and like most horror movies, that one didn't end well. Not liking to receive surprises, he decided to ask the mountain of fur that they were following.
"Excuse me, um, Professor?" said Harry as respectfully as possible.
"Who me?" chuckled the massive man. "I be no professor. Me name is Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of Keys at Hogwarts."
'Keeper of Keys?' thought Harry darkly. This was someone that he would definitely want to get to know.
"Pleasure to meet you, Mr Hagrid." said Harry. "My name is Harry Quinn."
"Pleasure to know you, Harry Quinn, but call me Hagrid." said the massive man. "None of this Mr stuff. Now, what can I do for ya?"
"I was wondering where we were going?" asked Harry.
"Why Hogwarts, of course!" chuckled Hagrid. "But first yers get to go a special way. It's tradition!"
'Powder puff world it is, then.' mused Harry to himself.
"And there it be!" exclaimed Hagrid. "Hogwarts!"
Harry looked up to see a very formidable looking castle, set atop the side of a cliff and overlooking a large murky-looking lake.
"How do we get there from here?" asked a timid looking first year.
"By boat, of course!" chuckled Hagrid, as though this was obvious. "What did ya think? You were going to have to swim for it?"
As Hagrid laughed merrily, many small unmanned boats sailed into view; bumping gently against the shore.
"No more than four to a boat." called out Hagrid.
Harry noted as he climbed aboard one of the small boats with Luna that Hagrid required one boat to himself. A small dark haired Asian girl a red headed girl joined them in their boat. Once everyone was seated, the tiny boats began to magically move across the water as though they were being pulled by an invisible rope.
"Wonder if anyone has ever drowned while crossing?" mused Harry aloud, leaning back.
"Surely not!" said the Asian girl, clearly a little panicked at the thought.
"Why would you ask that?" retorted the red haired girl, reminding Harry of the Weasley boy.
"It's a perfectly logical question." said Luna dreamily.
"I was bored and curious, so I thought I'd ask." hummed Harry.
"Sounds like something my brothers might say." said the red haired girl.
"Where are my manners." said Harry straightening up. "The name's Harry Quinn."
"Pleasure to meet you, Harry." said the Asian girl. "My name is Lian Lu."
"Harry already knows me, but I'm Luna Lovegood." chimed Luna dreamily, causing Harry to smirk.
"Hi, I'm Ginny Weasley." said the red haired girl.
"Weasley... as in Ron and Perry Weasley?" asked Harry, raising his eyebrows slightly.
"My brothers." replied Ginny. "Sorry if you've met Ron, and the other is Percy, but call him Perry. That will annoy him a lot!"
Harry smirked at the girl's slightly mischievous personality.
"Do you have any other family at Hogwarts?" asked Luna.
"Oh yes." said Ginny, grinning broadly. "Fred and George. They're twins, and once you meet them you'll never forget 'um – I guarantee it!"
"Do you have any sisters?" asked Lian.
"No." sighed Ginny. "I'm the youngest of seven and the only girl. What about you?"
"Only child." said Luna.
"Same here." said Lian.
"One of a kind." said Harry dramatically, brushing the hair from his forehead.
Ginny and Lian both gasped.
"That scar!" squeaked Ginny. "You're... you're..."
"That's right... I'm one of THEM!" interrupted Harry.
"You're one of who?" asked Lian timidly, looking nervous again.
"I don't know. She started it!" retorted Harry, pointing at Ginny and smiling sadistically.
"What?" squeaked Ginny, barely above a whisper. "No... I mean... I meant you're Harry Potter."
"My birth name is Harry Potter." corrected Harry. "My aunt gave me her last name when I went to live with her. It's the only name I've ever known and I will not answer to any other."
"So... are any of the books about you true?" asked Lian slowly.
"None that I've been told about." replied Harry, thinking of what Hermione had told him.
"According to what I've read, you should be older than me." said Lian. "Is this false as well?"
"This is true." replied Harry. "I missed my first year due to being so far away. Now, enough of me. Let's talk about something interesting, like how much longer this boat ride is."
"We're almost to the castle." said Lian. "I'm sure it won't be much longer now."
Harry looked ahead to see the face of a cliff coming into view. At the base was what looked to be the opening to a cave. Without warning, Harry broke into song.
"We are sailing from our homeland,
Cross the ocean on the sea,
For whatever reasons be,
We question all authority!"
Harry finished just as the tiny boats sailed into the cave; Hagrid yelling for them to duck down over Harry's serenade. Harry held the last note as long as he could; echoing throughout. When he was finished, the three girls giggled uncontrollably while the other students simply stared at him from their boats.
"Merlin!" giggled Lian.
"Who?" retorted Harry.
"It's an expression, Harry." said Luna.
"You've never heard of the Sorcerer named Merlin?" asked Ginny dumbstruck.
"Yeah I've heard of him, but never like that." replied Harry. "Still trying to get your 'expressions' down. Sometimes I feel like I'm standing in a elevator and asking for directions."
The three girls giggled again at Harry's strange humor. The boats exited the mouth of the cave into a cove. He looked up to see the dark outline of the base of the castle and couldn't hide the sadistic smirk that formed at the sight.
Once the boats made shore, Harry helped each of the girls out of the vessel and onto the sandy landing. Hagrid led the group up a staircase that ascended into the rock, until they reached two giant doors. He was starting to see why the Headmaster took so much pride in his school. It was intimidating, grand and Harry was going to learn every secret it had.
Hagrid knocked three times on the massive doors, then waited. A greasy looking man opened the door, mumbled something to Hagrid.
"Ain't got no Harry Potter." said Hagrid loudly. "Got a Harry Quinn though."
The greasy man mumbled something else that was followed by an, "Oh." from Hagrid.
"Uh, Harry Quinn." called Hagrid.
Harry sighed as he stepped forward to the front of the group.
"Blimey." said Hagrid. "So yer James and Lily's son."
"Take it you knew my parents." groaned Harry.
"Yeah, I did." replied Hagrid. "Fine people. Terrible thing that happened. Professor McGonagall would like a word with you."
Hagrid pointed to the stern looking witch standing just inside the doorway. Harry wondered as he made his way to her if she had heard about what happened on the train.
"Will it be Potter or Quinn?" asked Professor McGonagall the moment he was close enough.
"Quinn for now, Professor." replied Harry respectfully. "The whole Potter thing is too confusing and it draws too much attention."
"Very well." said Professor McGonagall. "However, I must warn you that news like this travels fast amongst the student body. Once it is out, attention will be something that you won't be able to avoid. Now, you will be sorted in order along with the rest. I will not let this be any more of a spectacle this evening than necessary."
"Whatever you say, Professor." said Harry, giving her a half bow.
Professor McGonagall gave him strange look, as though she wasn't so sure about him, before stepping forward to address the first year students. It was a boring speech and held little interest for him. He was more interested in what he assumed was one of the school ghosts that seemed to be hovering above the group.
Once the Professor's intro speech was over she made her way into what must be the Great Hall. Hermione had described it to him on the train and it was the only area teaming with life at the moment. A few minutes later, Professor McGonagall returned and escorted the group into the hall.
Just as Hermione had said, Professor McGonagall placed an old looking hat on a stool at the front of the hall, then waited. The hat, like a puppet without strings, began to sing from the rip near it's brim. The song was odd and did not interest Harry, so he began to hum his own tune. A girl from the Ravenclaw table shot him an ugly look.
"Stop singing." said Harry, opening his robes and pretending to talk to someone inside his pocket. "Got enough air down there? Good, good."
The Ravenclaw's eyes widened before quickly looking away. Harry smirked again at how easy it was to spook these witches and wizards. When the hat finished singing, the Great Hall broke into applause.
One-by-one, the new students approached the stool when Professor McGonagall called their name. She placed the hat on their head and it yelled out their school house. Lian was Sorted into Ravenclaw and so was Luna.
So far it seemed to be down to either Ravenclaw or Gryffindor for Harry. The Hufflepuffs looked too boring and the Slytherins were way too obviously up to no good. He knew that he needed to be somewhere that he could blend and eventually be above suspicion.
"Quinn, Harry!" called Professor McGonagall.
Harry made his way up to the stool and McGonagall placed the hat upon his head.
"Well, well, well indeed." said a voice in Harry's ear. "There's no doubt where you belong."
'It had better be Ravenclaw or Gryffindor.' thought Harry.
"Oh no, young man." said the voice. "Slytherin is the house for you."
'You can read my thoughts?' pondered Harry.
"I can see into your head." said the voice. "And yes, I can read your thoughts."
'So can you see what I've done with knives in the past?' thought Harry.
"Absolutely." said the voice.
'Then make no mistake.' thought Harry. 'Put me into Ravenclaw or Gryffindor. Anything else and I'll find you and carve a smile into that rag of a face – permanently! Understood?'
There was a long silence before the hat shouted out, "GRYFFINDOR!"
Professor McGonagall removed the hat from his head, sporting an even stranger look still; one of shock mixed with concern. Harry hopped down from the stool to loud applause from the Gryffindor table. He made his way down the table, shaking hands as he went, until he found Hermione and Neville. Neville immediately made room for him on the bench.
"Welcome to Gryffindor." said Neville, shaking his hand.
"You'll tell me how you managed it later." whispered Hermione.
"As you wish." smirked Harry, causing Hermione to blush at the mischief in his eyes.
Harry did not pay attention to the Sorting again until it was Ginny's turn. She was instantly sorted into Gryffindor, to no surprise. When the Sorting was finished, Professor Dumbledore stood and gave a short speech before food magically appeared on the table in-front of them. His aunt had made sure that he had never went hungry, but the shear amount of food before him made him feel as though he had been starving for years.
When the deserts were served, Professor Dumbledore rose to his feet once more and gave another address. Harry found this speech to be more informative than the first one. Mention of the Forbidden Forest being off limits to students drew a glance from the Headmaster to a set of red headed twin boys that must be Ginny's brothers. The shear mayhem hidden behind their innocent expressions told Harry that they were ones to become acquainted with.
Then something unexpected happened. Professor Dumbledore led the school in what he referred to as a song. It sounded like something that the Riddler had written while suffering from a hangover. Harry slowly sang along, as everyone seemed to be singing at their own pace. When it was finished, he realized that there were twisted individuals in this world as well.
Once the hall was dismissed, the first year students followed the House Prefects to their dorm rooms while Harry chose to stay with Hermione and Neville. They showed him up to the Gryffindor common room and how to get in. Once inside, he looked around and admired how cozy and boring the room looked. He saw Ginny's twin brothers standing next to the fireplace. As though they sensed his desires, they stared at him as though they'd been waiting for him to arrive.
"You two find me interesting?" asked Harry, walking up to the Weasley twins.
"We heard what you did to our brother." said the twin on the left.
"And we heard who you are from our sister." said the twin on the right.
"Your brother needs some manners and I did nothing to him that a pair of clean tidy whiteys wouldn't fix." retorted Harry.
"You've got it all wrong, mate." said the twin on the left.
"We're not mad, we're glad." said the twin on the right.
"Ickle Ronnie needs a good kick from time to time." said the twins in unison.
"I'm Fred." said the twin on the left.
"And I'm George." said the twin on the right.
Both twins extended their hands in greeting. Harry shook both hands, unable to suppress a smirk.
"And you, Harry Quinn." said Fred.
"Have a flare to you." said George.
"It's in your eyes." said the twins in unison.
Harry turned around to see Neville and Hermione hanging back towards the middle of the common room; watching from afar. Harry motioned for them to join him. They very reluctantly did so.
"Fred – George, these are my friends Neville and Hermione." said Harry.
"They know who we are." hissed Hermione in Harry's ear.
"Then why were you standing so far away?" asked Harry.
"Overlook 'em, Harry." said Fred.
"Most give the kings of chaos space." said George.
'Kings of chaos, aye? We'll see about that!', thought Harry.
"Well, kings, if you're going to accept me into your circle of mates, then you'll have to accept them as well." said Harry firmly.
"Gladly." said George.
"We don't shy away from people." said Fred.
"People shy away from us." said George.
"It's because trouble tends to follow you two." said Neville.
"Us?" retorted the twins in unison. "Never!"
The twins, Neville and Hermione started laughing at once. Harry, on the other hand, was smirking too hard to laugh. Mr J had taught him to find and surround himself with talented outcasts. Friendship was only something that Aunt Harley ever sought out from others. He saw the possibilities of both in all of those he had befriended thus far. The rest of the common room was looking on at the ruckus with mixed expressions, and rightfully so. When Harry was finished here, the freaks would run this school and the normal people would hide in their corners.
Lucius Malfoy was sorting through his accounts in his study when his wife entered the room. It did not go unnoticed by him that she was wearing barely more than a loosely tied robe.
"Heard from Draco?" asked Narcissa Malfoy, a playful tone to her voice.
"Yes." replied Lucius, leaning back in his chair. "He's settled in at school and ready for his second year to begin. Said there was an anomaly during the Sorting. A second year student was just now starting at Hogwarts. He was wondering if I knew of any transfers."
"That's nice, dear." said Narcissa, clearly not interested. "Will you be much longer?"
"I have a few more things to sort out, then I'll be ready to turn in." replied Lucius, a greedy look covering his face.
"Don't be long, love." said Narcissa, smiling and walking slowly out of the study.
"She seems eager."
Lucius jumped up, scanning the study for the source of the voice; his wand drawn and ready. Suddenly, the plant behind him ensnared him in its branches, causing him to drop his wand.
"Love the foliage you have here." said Ivy, stepping into the study seductively.
"How dare you!" growled Lucius.
"Shhh." said Mr J, stepping out of the shadows and into the light. "Wouldn't want to concern the misses."
"Who are you and how did you get into my house?" demanded Lucius, struggling against the branches.
"Wasn't that hard." replied Harley, stepping out from behind Mr J. "Your garden was just dying for some attention and they just loved Ivy."
"You're nothing but a bunch of Muggle freaks." spat Lucius. "How did you find my house?"
"Followed you." replied Mr J. "I've learned a thing or two about magic in my day. You and your pompous ways looked exactly like the type of – whatever you are – that I needed. And yes... we're freaks."
"And what is it that you want from me?" spat Lucius.
"Information, my good sir." said Mr J. "Information about the school that your son goes to. Now, we have no intentions of harming you or your family – if – you cooperate."
"I know darkness." spat Lucius. "I've witnessed the darkest of deeds committed by the darkest of wizards, so why should I take orders from a Muggle wearing face paint and a cheap purple suit?"
"I can be – persuasive." retorted Mr J, inching closer. "Now, let's be civil. Shall we? I mean – why such the serious face?"
"I see that this may take a while." sighed Ivy. "Think I'll go make sure that the misses doesn't get – lonely."
"Stay away from my wife!" growled Lucius.
Ivy ignored him as she left the room. They could hear her singing softly as she made her way up the stairs, "No one knows the love of another until they've felt the thorns of a rose!"
"Albus!" said Professor McGonagall sharply. "A word!"
"Yes, Minerva?" replied Professor Dumbledore, looking up from his desk.
"Don't play innocent with me, Albus Dumbledore!" spat Professor McGonagall. "How did that boy get into my house?"
"The Sorting Hat placed him there." replied Professor Dumbledore. "You know I have no control over where the Hat places students. It is the purpose of the Hat – to be impartial."
"Have you asked the Hat why, Albus?" asked Professor McGonagall.
"The Hat has chosen to remain silent on this matter." replied Professor Dumbledore. "It does not have to explain itself. The Founders made it that way."
Professor McGonagall pinched the bridge of her nose with her fingers.
"Do you feel that we have made a mistake bringing him here?" asked Professor Dumbledore.
"Don't you?" retorted Professor McGonagall.
"Minerva, this is where he belongs." replied Professor Dumbledore softly. "It's his birth-right. I truly fear what might have happened to him if he had stayed with his aunt."
"I fear what might happen with him here!" exclaimed Professor McGonagall. "He's – he's mad as a march hare!"
"Now Minerva –"
"Don't now Minerva me, Albus!" interrupted Professor McGonagall. "Surely you've heard the reports from the train and from Hagrid. Not to mention the Ravenclaw Prefect."
"Minerva, he's not mad." stated Dumbledore firmly. "To the contrary, he's – calculating."
"The traits of a Slytherin." interjected Professor McGonagall.
"He's also brave and courageous." said Dumbledore. "He showed that on the train – twice. Once with Mr Weasley and once with Mr Malfoy. Both times he was defending his new friends. These are the traits of a Gryffindor."
"That's it then?" retorted Professor McGonagall.
"He stays, Minerva." said Dumbledore firmly. "That's my final word. If something changes, we'll address it then. Remember, it's okay to be different."
Professor McGonagall nodded curtly before turning to leave the Headmaster's office. As she closed the door she muttered, "You should know."
A/N: Thanks to all for the great reviews and the overwhelming response to this story! This Harry is really fun to write and I'm glad to see that a lot of people enjoy him too. To answer to some questions concerning his personality: this Harry really lives for today. He formulates plans for the future, but doesn't dwell too long on the past. Not to overstate this, but he's twelve and has been raised by maniacs.
Sorry for the long delay between posts. Life has been really busy. Hope you enjoyed the chapter and please review. There's much more to come, I promise! No beta, so any mistakes are all on me.