Chapter Seven
~Christian~
My bathroom door adjacent to my childhood bedroom is barely open. It dimly illuminates the room. I sit in a chair across from my childhood bed where I spent my years of isolating loneliness. Tonight, I am not alone in this room. Beside me, Anastasia is knocked out cold from the strong dose of a narcotic pain pill that she was forced to take when yet another of her debilitating headaches hit her. She suffered her first one the day we told her about Jack Hyde attacking her, and they've been sporadic since. There is no warning before one hits her and it rips my heart out to witness them. It's like there's no end to her suffering.
It's nearing nine-thirty at night and Ana probably won't awaken until late tomorrow morning. It's terrifying to watch one of the 'episodes' as Dr. Berman refers to them, come upon suddenly. The good doctor told us that we're lucky that Ana has a 'visual aura" before she loses consciousness; that means we can get a pain pill in her. I wanted to choke the living shit out of her when I heard the word 'lucky'. Ana has described that she sees colors right before the pain hits her. So, far she's seeing the color white. We've all tried to figure out what that means, but Dr. Berman told us it was futile and a waste of our time to make sense of something that doesn't make any sense.
I watch Ana's chest rise and fall and I envy her deep slumber. If I could only rest my exhausted mind that continues to wage a war within itself. But I can't. Sleep has escaped me for so long that I can't remember the last time I actually had some. Inside my head, sleep has been eroded by guilt, chaos and dread. All are unfathomable. This dim light shines on the darkest parts of myself and the deceit I'm perpetuating while I continue pushing that deceit, further, knowing what it could bring about if the truth comes out. My behavior is a twisted and sickening contradiction; I love Anastasia Steele more than the oxygen in my lungs. I am also lying to her face about our past. I've told myself it's to protect her. I know that's bullshit. It's to protect me from her remembering that first month we were together.
That first month when I did all I could to make her my submissive. That first month that she told me I sickened her. The first month when I terrified her. The first month where she did things that humiliated her because she'd fallen in love me. That's what I'm protecting myself from; Anastasia remembering that month and believing that I'm that same man. She has no memory of how we came back together and built a loving relationship. She doesn't remember that we were happy. So, what if the only thing she remembers is that fucking first month? She'd run so far that I'd never find her again. And I can't risk that. I won't risk that. My actions are inexcusable and I believe they're unforgivable. Yet, I continue to do whatever I can to hide the truth from her. It's disgusting and sickens me, and what's worse is that it's becoming easier for me to do.
It's the night of Thanksgiving, and Anastasia was discharged from the hospital two days ago. Everyone, Dr.'s Berman and Marshall included, felt it best that Ana come to my parent's home where my mother can keep an eye on her. Anastasia's memory still hasn't returned, and I see that as a point in my gross advantage. Physically, she's made tremendous progress and it's getting easier for her to be up and walking on her own. She was able to stop her physical therapy before she was discharged from the hospital.
It's the fucking headaches that continue to plague her. And may God forgive my soul, but my stomach drops whenever someone suggests the headaches might bring back Ana's memories. The majority of Ana's memories of the past six months have been erased like chalk on a chalkboard. It has given me the opportunity to finally be a decent man without a depraved past in her eyes. Although, the opportunity comes with a heavy cost. I honestly believe if Ana's full memory comes back, I'll lose her forever. She would never forgive me for what I'm doing. And neither would my family.
The day the doctors told us what limited memories Ana had retained, those skewed and hollow months of May and June, those months I spent recruiting her to be my sub and treated her so horribly, I knew what I could do: lie. I could lie about those early days, but was I willing to take the risk? The risk of her remembering the truth, and being repelled by me, shook me to the core. So, was lying to Ana a risk I wanted to take? I was terrified her confused mind would see how our relationship actually began, and she would regard me as the monster she initially saw me as. All I could envision was her recalling those four weeks of the fear she'd admitted to Flynn and me that she'd endured just to be with me. What if she remembered that fear and not our reconciliation? I just couldn't stand the thought, and it only took me minutes to decide to be a fucking piece of shit liar to the woman I want to give my last name to.
I was determined to mislead her from that very first step I took into her hospital room that morning.
Yet, there must be a God for bastards like me, because every memory that Ana has of us is positive and happy. Why, and how we met. The Saturday that I stalked her at Clayton's. The photo shoot, and how I took her to a coffee shop afterward. My gift of the Tess books, when I flew her to Escala in Charlie Tango. When I took her virginity, and sleeping in my bed that night. Our dinner date at The Heathman.
But, and there's a large but, within those memories, the truth is scrambled. She's forgotten that the night I took her virginity was when I revealed who I really was to her. Ana has no recollection that our dinner date at the Heathman was to go over that fucking contract or that I had her sign an NDA. She has no memory of the subs or my past with Elena. She has no memory of the two dinners here at my parents house that Elena Lincoln attended, and Anastasia stormed out without a word. Now, that was uncomfortable and problematic. For some reason, Mom never questioned Ana's behavior. The most blessed memory that she's lost is when I took a belt to her, and she ran as fast and as far as she could from me. If only I could forget that morning; she looked so full of despair and desperation that I could barely face her. Now, I realize that I couldn't look at her despair and desperation because of my own.
I think about the man I was for twenty-seven years and regard him as a caricature. A character in a comic book that a ten-year-old Mia could have drawn with colored pencils. He was also morose and a lonely, cold person. I can now see I was out of control, full of grief and hate. I hated myself and everyone else. What I also know is that person began to float out of my life when Anastasia Steele fell into it. She grabbed my heart the second I caught my first glimpse of those majestic blue eyes. Her kind soul is why I now know what love is. We began as a complex, wounded pair, who morphed into a single person on some spiritual journey. Those feelings, and Anastasia's love for me are why I'm desperate to keep her from remembering that one fucking month when all she saw was my depravity.
That's why I'm walking down a road that could lead me to straight to hell. On one level, I know that playing with Ana's mind is horrible. On another, I believe that I'm sparing her pain. I can wash away the four months she spent feeling lacking over my previous lifestyle. I want to erase her insecurities over all of the submissives I'd been with. I cringe when I remember how Ana would tell me that she felt she'd never be enough to keep me. I also have the ability to wipe away her knowledge and deplorable opinions of my past relationship with Elena, and how I had ignored the hurt I caused her by keeping Elena in my life. So, I admit that I'm doing this for selfish reasons, but it's also beneficial to Anastasia. Isn't it? She doesn't have to live with that pain again if she doesn't remember it.
I've done everything possible to keep her from recalling the truth. I'm so grateful that I cut personal and professional ties with Elena Lincoln while Ana was in a coma. At the time, I didn't know that was a Godsend, but now I see the advantage it has given me. While I'm sure that my mother has told Elena everything about Ana's condition, she hasn't attempted to contact me, and I haven't seen her in months.
Although I've been lucky enough that Elena is no longer a part of my life, unfortunately, she is aware of the entire ugly truth concerning my early relationship with Ana and my previous life. That knowledge hangs over my head like an anvil that I try to ignore. It's impossible, though. I know that one word from Elena's vile mouth could easily ruin everything, especially if she were to feed Ana the truth about that afternoon confrontation at Esclava and everything else.
Jesus. I was such an asshole that I took Ana there without regard of how she felt about Elena. That's another unforgivable sin that I committed. Ana did hear what Elena told me, and she was correct that I did listen to Elena about Anastasia finally needing to know what a real punishment was.
I love Ana so fucking much that I don't want her to hurt or ever feel insecure. I also want the chance to bury my own memories of being a cruel sadist and be a normal mam; a man that I've dreamt of being.
I know these fucked up thoughts are simply justifications of my behavior. Behavior, that I know is sick and so very wrong. I strongly believe the more warm and fuzzy scenarios I feed Ana will stick in her mind and close the door on the past. Fuck, I also want my Ana back. I want her to remember every wonderful moment we spent together after those nightmare five days apart. I hate that she can't recall a damn minute of four months of her life, and is no longer the strong and more independent woman she had become. I long for that Anastasia. The woman who would throw her head back, laughing until tears were a trail running down her flushed cheeks. Anastasia 2.0 is once again that shy, and ever so innocent college co-ed. While I do find that endearing, I miss the woman who threw wine glasses against my kitchen walls and wouldn't have thought twice about taking a swing at Elena.
When Ana was discharged from the hospital, Ray came to my parents with her, and is staying for the long Thanksgiving weekend. Thank fuck, Carla finally went back to Georgia. I could tell that for some reason Ana didn't seem to want her mother around and when she was, Ana was downright hostile towards her. She didn't even care when Carla flew home. I was particularly relieved because half of the time she was here, all she did was harp on how Anastasia was a devoted diary and journal writer, like I didn't know that, and went on and on about where her latest one is. Carla, took a reluctant Kate back to the girls' apartment to tear the place a part to find it. Kate, whose been wary of being alone after Jack Hyde attacked Ana, as well as being in the apartment, finally had enough of Carla and told her to give it a rest. Kate also doesn't like Carla and was ecstatic when she left.
What would everyone think of me if they knew Ana's leather-bound journal is securely locked in the safe in my office? I read it while she was in the hospital, took in her words, and use them as proof that I have to protect her sweet heart. No one would see my actions as a benefit to Ana's mental health and poor self-esteem. And, yeah, I do feel guilty thinking about any damage my actions could cause Anastasia, but I also feel the decision that I've made is right. But there's a tiny voice in my head that reminds me that all of my underhanded actions are more for my benefit. Shit, maybe I am that monster Ana believed me to be that first month that we knew each other.
There's one problem in my plan; no, there's a person who may be a problem in my plan. But so far, I'm giving her credit for staying quiet if she does know. Her name is Katherine Kavanagh and I'm almost a hundred percent sure she knows everything about my relationship with her best friend. I've come a long way when it comes to my relationship with Kate. It's true that we nearly murdered one another that first month I spent with Ana, and I know that Ana respected the NDA she signed at that time. Hell, looking back on it, Ana was probably terrified to say anything, NDA or not.
But once I came to believe that Ana did love me, and we were doing a relationship her way, I ripped up that NDA in Ana's face. That's when I believe my girl finally confided in her best friend. I have to give it to Kate; she's never brought it up to me nor has she treated me with disdain as she did in those early days. It's also obvious Kate hasn't told my brother.
At times, since Ana's injury, I've caught those intelligent green eyes of Kate staring at me, burning with something that resembles curiosity. However, she's never approached me or brought the past, or present, up. Once that NDA was in pieces, Kate seemed to thaw when it came to cold dislike of me, and over the months, we become friends. Of course, we bonded after Ana's attack and she was in the hospital near death, and it's Kate and Eamon Kavanagh who've kept Jack Hyde in all of the sources of media that Eamon owns. If I thought I could fully trust Kate with my truth about what I'm currently doing, I'd ask her why she hasn't told Ana about those early days. She's shown my girl pictures of the months we'd all spent together, and her and Mia have shown Ana videos of our family outings, but she's not said a word about what I'm positive she knows. I blame it on Kate not wanting to hurt Ana. Maybe there's more to it than that, but I'm trying not to dwell upon it. And I'm especially grateful that Kate listened to me and Elliot when she was told she needed a CPO. She surprised the hell out of us by agreeing, and then she moved in with Elliot. I want Katherine protected just as much as the rest of my family does.
Needing a reprieve from my thoughts, I drag my sorry ass from my chair and make my way towards Ana. Pushing hair out of her face, I bend down and kiss the tip of her nose. I leave the bathroom light on in case she wakes up disoriented and afraid. Luke Sawyer, who has been Ana's CPO since I met her, is standing beside the door. Sawyer is extremely protective of Anastasia and couldn't give a shit if he's having to stay by my bedroom door. My family thinks I'm being over the top by having him watch over her in the house, but with the freak who nearly killed my girlfriend on the loose, I'm not taking any chances. I also assigned Belinda Prescott to her. Ana, who lacks the understanding of why I have security, along with just being Anastasia, put up one hell of an argument over it. Nodding to Sawyer, I reluctantly make my way back downstairs.
Mom, Kate, and Mia are nowhere to be seen. I make my way to where my father, Ray, and Elliot are playing poker. I flop into a seat beside my brother, and bow out of joining the next game.
"How's my girl, Christian?" Ray asks, an unlit cigar in his mouth. The sight amuses me despite my mood.
"Sound asleep. Sawyer's by the door. He'll hear her if she wakes up."
"Good. I'm glad those pills work, but I worry that she's going to have to live with those damn headaches for the rest of her life. Dr. Berman couldn't even tell us if they'd eventually go away," he grumbles.
"I'm staying positive about them being temporary. She's still in the early stages of her recovery, after all. Mom keeps reminding me of that. I just hope it's true, and she's not saying it to make me feel better," I mutter.
"Son, do you want a drink? You look like you need one. I know these past months have been hell, but concentrate on the fact that Ana is healing, well enough to be out of the hospital, and upstairs in your old bed," Dad says, then points a finger at me. "You also need to go back to work. It will do you good, Christian."
I sigh. "I'm aware of that, Dad. But I'm going to stay home with Ana for a few more weeks. I want to take care of her, plus, it will ease my mind. And I'll pass on the drink. I'm tired, and will probably just go to bed. I don't know if I should sleep in the bed with Ana. I'm afraid I'll do something that will hurt her."
"Bro, you know those pills make her sleep all night. The only way you'll bother her if she wakes up and sees your ugly face," Elliot says, then begins laughing. I think he's buzzed.
"Fuck off, Elliot."
"Christian, you haven't mentioned that Hyde bastard in a while. I assume your guys haven't picked up his scent," Ray says, looking at me sharply.
"You're right, he's disappeared into thin air. The cops can't find out shit, and neither can my team. I still have the feeling we haven't seen the last of the fucker. He'd just better pray that I don't get my hands on him before the cops do. I'll kill him," I reply.
"Just keep the media on the story and his face out there. If he's stupid enough to remain in the area, someone will catch sight of him," my father says. "And when Hyde does crawl out of the hole he's been hiding in, we don't have to worry where Ana is concerned. Keeping her condition and whereabouts from the public was the best advice Katherine gave you. All the bastard knows is that he isn't wanted for murder."
"At least some of those poor women finally spoke up. If that media coverage didn't add fuel to the fire, I don't know what else could. Where did you send them to, anyway?"
I heave out a deep sigh. I fucking hate talking about this shit.
"Here and there. Detective Clark didn't like the idea that they were leaving Seattle, but were satisfied that the SPD knew where they're at. They've also agreed to testify against when Hyde is found."
"That was a kind and generous thing you did, young man. We're all proud of you, and I know Annie is. It goes to show what a good heart you have," says a very wrong Ray Steele.
If Anastasia's father knew how I'm mangling his daughter's mind, he'd cut my throat - not praise me for being kind or having a good heart. And I don't know what Ana would do. I hate the very thought. Shit, why did I think coming downstairs was a good idea?
Female voices emerge from the kitchen. The closer they get; I hear Mia going over the stores she's intends to invade for Black Friday shopping. I hear Mia mentioning she's dragging Anastasia along. Yeah, right. Mia throws her arms around my neck from behind, squeezing me tightly.
"For fucks sake, Mia, could you be any louder?" Elliot asks. His alcohol intake has induced a slip of his tongue in front of our mother, who glares at him, shaking her head.
"Ana isn't going shopping tomorrow. She's isn't physically able to withstand that, so don't even mention it to her," I say, turning to face my little sister.
Mia frowns, but Kate's shaking her head at her. "Mia, it's not safe for Ana to be out. One, she doesn't need to be seen, and two, she could have one of those episodes and you'd have no idea what to do," Kate tells her.
"Well, what am I supposed to say when she asks where I'm going? Ana's been fine, Kate. Well, not fine, but maybe she can hit a few stores with me. She needs some girl time, for goodness' sake," Mia keeps going on. I can only imagine how bored she must be. Stop being such a downer."
"Mia, I'm with Kate on this one. Annie may be getting around and putting on a brave front, but the girl is as weak as a kitten," replies Ray.
"I'm sure Ana will be ready for shopping once it's closer to Christmas," Mia keeps on.
"You ever heard of shopping on the internet, Mia?" Elliot jumps back in, pulling Kate into his lap. Her lips are pursed, and she's darting her eyes between me and my sister.
"How is Ana, dear? Did the medicine help?" Mom asks, drowning out Mia's whining.
I nod, rubbing my hands down my face. "Yes. She's sleeping soundly. I was about to head up and go to sleep as well. It feels like the past few months have landed on me all at once, and I'm worried sick over these continued headaches. It's like there's no end to Ana's suffering."
"Don't feel that way, Christian, and don't be discouraged about Ana's progress, which has been remarkable. I know what she's dealing with now is hard to watch, it's hard for all of us to watch, but I'm optimistic that they'll eventually start to abate," Mom says, taking a sip of Dad's bourbon. "Remember, her injury is still healing. It's only been two months. Ana's very lucky that headaches, no matter how awful they may be, are the only complications she has."
"Mom, I realize that, but it doesn't stop from worrying me. I don't want Ana to suffer, and it kills me to know that there's nothing I can do to help her. Plus, I hate watching her take all of those medications every morning."
"Son, they're necessary. Now, you just being by her side is all Ana needs. We're all here to support the both of you, darling. Have faith that she will fully heal, and be grateful that she's come so far in such little time," replies my mother, who is gently stroking the side of my face.
"I know, and I can't thank you enough—"
My phone, that I had tossed onto the table begins to vibrate. Looking at the display screen, I see Taylor's name flashing on it, and frown. Why is he calling? I'd given him the long Thanksgiving holiday off so that he could spend it with Gail and his daughter. I don't miss the fact that my father caught sight of who is calling me so late.
I stand to leave the room for privacy. "Excuse me. I've got to take this call," I hurriedly mutter, making my way to the foyer.
"Grey."
"Sir, there's a situation you need to be apprised of," Taylor begins. He sounds exasperated. In control, but exasperated. "I don't have all of the details yet; they're coming in slowly."
"Go ahead."
Taylor exhales deeply into the receiver. I can't discern if he's pissed off or concerned.
"To begin with, I received a call from Guffin, he's in the security office at Escala. He told me the alarm at Miss Steele and Miss Kavanagh's apartment had gone off, and the CCTV went out."
Immediately after the Hyde incident, I put in a state-of-the-art security system in Ana and Kate's apartment, even though neither of them was living there. It would probably be easier to break into the White House than the girls' apartment.
"What the fuck, Taylor? Does Guffin know why? Was the security system breached? Was it both the inside and outside CCTV?" I ask, louder than intended.
"Sir, Guffin said both," Taylor replies.
My heart begins to thump disjointedly. It only calms when I look at the staircase and I remember that Ana is safe upstairs in my childhood room with Sawyer looking out for her.
"What the fucking hell, Taylor? Who the fuck is headed over there to find out what the hell happened? Jesus Christ!"
"Boss, Wilson and Reynolds should be there by now. I currently don't have all of the facts. After getting Gail and Sophie settled with Gail's sister, I immediately got a call from a source at the police department giving me the heads up. He's aware of your connection to Miss Steele," Taylor calmly tells me, he pauses.
"He said that the PD, along with the fire department, were already on scene. I told him that two of my guys were headed over to the apartment complex."
The fire department?
"The fucking fire department?" I yell. "Why the fuck are they there? Son of a bitch!"
I'm rapidly pacing, and vaguely hear footfalls behind me.
"Mr. Grey, Reynolds is calling me now. Let me put him on conference call."
"Drew, Mr. Grey is on the line with us. What the fuck is going on?" Taylor's tone is brusque and impatient.
"Mr. Grey, T, this is a clusterfuck and, T, I suggest you don't head over here. Neither the PD or the fire department are allowing anyone near the apartment complex. What little we've found out has come from a few residents and Wilson greased the palm of a cop he knows. He got some pretty good intel," Reynolds rapidly spits out.
I can hear sirens and loud voices behind him.
"What's going on, Reynolds? I'm on my way, but my ETA is another twenty. Mr. Grey doesn't have all fucking night, so start talking."
"Reynolds, what the fuck?" I grit through clenched teeth.
Glancing to my left, I see Dad, Ray, and Elliot standing beside me, looking concerned.
"Sir, the police had already closed off the road in front of the complex. Wilson turned around and parked down the street, and we ran up. That's when we saw the fires and the fire department, and were stopped by some asshole cop who wouldn't let us get any closer," Reynolds is speaking rapidly, and sounds like he's running. "T, again, I suggest you don't bother coming over here. Now, the fucking arson investigators are here, and the place is on complete lockdown," he says,
Wait. Fires? As in, plural?
"Whoa. What the hell?" Taylor barks.
I'm grinding my teeth with impatience, and punch a wall.
I hear Mia yelp from behind me.
I turn and frown. My entire damn family is listening to me. Fuck.
"You're testing my patience, Reynolds," I roar.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Grey. We were pushed back to where most of the residents were, and overheard some of what they knew. It seems that not only was an apartment set on a fire, a car was, too."
"Make some god damn sense, Reynolds!" Taylor screams through the phone, loud enough to even make me flinch.
"Quit talking in circles and tell us what the in the fuck this has to do with Miss Steele and Miss Kavanagh's apartment!" Taylor yells.
My stomach drops. I know. I just fucking know. And I know that Jason does, too.
"Reynolds, stop yanking your dick and tell me what the fuck is going on. I don't give a shit about the incidentals. Tell me what I need to know before I beat it out of you. Why did the alarms at Miss Steele and Miss Kavanagh's apartment go off?" I demand.
"Why the fuck did our visuals inside and outside go black?" Taylor continues to scream, and it sounds like he just punched the dashboard.
Reynolds whistles between his teeth. He pauses, and I have to squat down, my elbows on my legs. I know it's going to be bad and Reynolds doesn't want to tell me.
"The apartment was Miss Steele's and Miss Kavanagh's. It's a total loss. So is the apartment directly under it," he finally tells us. "That's not all, Mr. Grey. The second fire was a car. The fire department got to it before it blew, but sir, it was Miss Steele's Audi."
Except for the sirens and all of the noise behind Reynolds, all is quiet on the phone line.
I know Taylor is planning what to do next.
My gut twists as I imagine what could have happened.
"Reynolds, what are the cops and fire department saying? Have you found out anything?" Taylor asks impatiently.
"Only from Guffin, and that's what time the security went black and the alarms went off," Reynolds replies.
I'm pulling my hair out.
"Jesus Christ, I can't believe this What if the girls had been home?"
Fuck, I shouldn't have said that.
"Bro, what the fuck is going on? Are you talking about Kate and Ana?" Elliot exclaims, pulling me around to face him.
I shake him off of me.
"Boss, I'll handle that pronto. My guy at the PD will have the dispatch times and better info. I'm headed to Escala to begin to sort this shit out." Taylor says.
"Any injuries, Reynolds?" I ask, hoping to God an innocent person hasn't been harmed.
"I honestly can't say for sure, Mr. Grey, but we haven't seen any ambulances take off outta here.
"Mr. Grey. Taylor, do you want us to stay here? We can gather whatever intel we can squeeze out of someone who likes to talk."
"Don't leave until I order you to, or the cops run you off. I want to know everything that's going on, and every word that's being drip fed between agencies," Taylor groans. "Are those fuck nuts aware the car and apartment belong to Miss Steele?"
Reynolds hesitates before answering. "Yes, and that bitch arson investigator Warren already has someone working on how to contact her," he replies.
This time I kick a wall and don't give a shit that my mother is going to kick my ass. Anger surges through me.
"Oh, she can fuck the fuck off! She's not coming anywhere near Anastasia!"
Fuck me. That's a woman who isn't going to be in the same room with Ana.
"That will happen over my dead body," I scream into my phone.
"Reynolds, stay put, and keep your head down. Call me if needed. Otherwise, we're out." Taylor hangs up on Reynolds.
"Don't worry about Warren or anyone bothering Miss Steele, Mr. Grey. However, I do advise that you and Miss Steele remain where you are for the time being. Is Miss Kavanagh with your family?" Taylor asks in a more measured tone.
"Yes. I'll make sure her and Elliot stay here. My father will make sure Warren doesn't try to bust in here with her bullshit," I mutter. "Taylor?"
"Sir?"
"As much as I don't want this to be true, I'm thinking this may be the handy work of a certain fire bug."
"One that burned his own car up, Mr. Grey? I hate to say that I agree with you. It certainly reeks of Hyde."
"We'll stay here. Keep me updated. I want to know the smallest detail, Taylor."
"Of course, Mr. Grey. I'll be in touch as soon as I speak with Guffin and my guy at the PD."
I end the call, and slowly turn to face my family. Their faces express a myriad of emotions, but the prominent one is dread. Oh, how I hate telling them this.
"What's happened, Christian?" my father asks, stepping closer to me.
Clearing my throat, I raise my arm and indicate that we should go back into the living room.
I sit beside Katherine, an unexpected urge to protect her overwhelms me.
"Taylor informed me of a…" I pull at the hair on the top of my head and look over at Kate. This really impacts her life more than any of ours.
No, I can't deny the significance of this. I've no doubt this is about Anastasia. I swallow the lump in my throat, unable to voice the proper words.
"Bro?" Elliot presses me.
"I wish that I didn't have to tell you all this. Around an hour ago, the security alarm at Kate and Ana's apartment went off. The CCTV went black, so there wasn't a way to see if anyone entered the apartment—"
"God! Someone broke in? Did the police catch them?" Mia squeaks from the other side of the room. I throw her a withering look.
"No, Mia. Now, kindly let me finish."
I look at Kate. "Guffin, one of my CPO's that monitors your apartment, called Taylor. There was a fire at your apartment complex. Anastasia's car was set on fire as well."
Everyone gasps, and I steel myself for the onslaught of questions that I answer the best way I can. The worst news has yet to be delivered. After I've sufficiently calmed my family and Ray, I shock Kate by taking her hand.
Elliot's eyes convey understanding, and he begins to rub her back.
"Kate, I'm so sorry to tell you this, " I begin softly.
"Were they able to save anything in the apartment?" she asks, the strength in her voice shocking me.
Elliot bends forward and stares at her profile, but her eyes are locked on mine.
"Babe—"
"Elliot," she interrupts him. We all heard Christian's side of the conversation. Someone set mine and Ana's apartment on fire," Kate says, her voice becoming choked with tears. "Everything's gone isn't it, Christian?"
I feel like a complete bastard for not having caught Hyde yet, and I'm unable to even look at her. I clasp her hand tighter.
"Yes. And so was the apartment below you. So far, we don't think anyone was injured. I'm so sorry."
Between Mom and Mia comforting a weeping Kate, and a cursing Ray and Elliot, my dad pulls me out of the room and down the hall.
"I don't need to remind you Hyde set his car on fire, do I?" Dad says in a quiet voice. "Perhaps when he's not assaulting women, he's an arsonist."
"That was the first thought that entered my mind, and Taylor agreed. Think of all the people he could have killed, Dad. We've got to find him."
My voice is desperate.
"This time, he could have successfully killed Ana. And Kate." Dad grimaces, his lips a thin white line. "Hyde must know that Ana's been released from the hospital. He's obviously been aware of her condition all of this time, Christian."
I turn in a circle, my hands clasping the back of my neck. I keep my eyes slammed shut so that I can keep myself from looking at him.
Opening my eyes, I exhale deeply.
"Hyde wanted to kill Ana, didn't he?" I ask hoarsely.
My father narrows his eyes and shakes his head.
"No. No, I don't believe he did," he answers.
"So, what the hell do you believe?"
Dad stares at me for a long moment before replying.
"I think he wanted to prove to you that he can easily get to her."