That night, Severus was unable to sleep although he was exhausted. The duels had tired him, the heat had tired him, Hermione had tired him. And now she even kept him from sleeping.

It wasn't nightmares this time; he'd have bet his life on her being awake. Emotions were sloshing against his mind relentlessly and he knew most of them better than he cared to admit. Guilt. Remorse. Helplessness. He struggled with the turmoils, with recurring horrors making his heart almost leap out of his chest. With the urge to scream as loud as possible just to make it stop. Severus rubbed his itching eyes with the heels of his hands and left his bed.

He could go up to her and tell her it was all right, hoping that her emotions would then calm down enough for him to find some sleep. But it wasn't all right. She had gone too far. Literally below the belt. His face burned when he thought back. He didn't expect her to do something like that. Didn't expect that rage could let her go to such lengths. He himself, yes. He did such things when he was angry. But Hermione?

He stood in the middle of his office bare-chested and stared at the door leading to the corridor. He should go up to her. But his legs refused to move. He couldn't. And it wouldn't do any good. Even if he went up to her and told her it was all right she wouldn't believe him. Just like she hadn't believed his apology a few days ago. And this time she would have been right. It damn well wasn't all right!

Severus ran his hands over his face and finally moved to the cupboard holding his potion supplies. There had to be a vial of the Draught of Living Death left. It had worked without side effects for Hermione, it would do the trick for him as well.

He took the vial and fetched a spoon from the kitchen, then returned to the bedroom. He laid down comfortably, counted drops of the potion on the spoon and put the bottle away before he took it. He fell asleep so quickly that the spoon dropped to his chest.

Severus was already in the lab when Hermione arrived the next morning. Her gaze scurried through the room and remorse, bitter, heavy, leaden remorse wallowed through Severus's mind. He closed his eyes and turned his back on her, pretending to wash something in the sink. Her emotions suffocated him, for a moment he had difficulty breathing.

"You know what to do," he then said curtly and maybe his tone kept her from answering. When the first blow of her intense emotions had faded he returned to the lab table.

It was a restless and unproductive morning. Hermione's pangs of conscience (and probably his aloofness) kept her from addressing him. But again and again, she looked at him, so deeply afflicted it made him angry. Every time he met her gaze she looked away. Severus clenched his teeth. He wished she would just stop it! He felt sore and worn down from her emotions and her gazes and his rage at what she had done. How she'd forced him to be face to face with her half-naked. And how she would have humiliated him even further if he hadn't dodged her curse.

Around noon he put the knife away and rubbed his aching temples. "Finish your work for today, Hermione."

She tore her head up and her gaze … this horrified gaze from her hazel eyes made him grimace. "Why?" she asked shakily and his heart began thumping faster when another emotion hit his mind.

He ignored it. He didn't want to concern himself with her emotions right now. "Do I really have to explain it to you?" he mumbled and his gaze apparently hit her as hard as hers had hit him. She flinched.

"No." She lowered her head. "Severus, I'm sorry about what happened yesterday. I don't know what got into me …"

"I do," he huffed so softly she didn't hear him. It was the same that always got into him when he got himself carried away with his anger (that was nothing else than a cloak around the unbearable pain hovering beneath it): The bitter desire to hurt as much as he hurt. That was why he had locked up his emotions so thoroughly in a dark corner of his mind. Nothing good came from anger.

"Can't we … just forget what happened?" Her plea tore him from his thoughts.

He shook his head. "No. Take the day off and do something else. Go and visit Ginevra and her offspring or do whatever else you want but go. I can't bear to be near you today."

Hermione stared at him, then she nodded. She collected her stuff and went to the door. Severus watched her silently. Pain gathered not in his mind anymore but somewhere in his chest and took his breath away.

Hermione turned to him. "I am sorry, Severus."

He reluctantly met her gaze. "I know."

"You will stay right here," Severus growled later that day when lunch at the Great Hall drew to a close and Albus got ready to leave the table.

He looked at him with raised eyebrows but Severus returned his gaze so mercilessly that he indeed sank back onto his chair. Albus seemed to anticipate what Severus wanted to discuss for neither of them said a word until every other faculty member remaining in the castle had left and the house-elves had cleared the table. "Well?" he finally asked and turned to Severus.

"Let's take a walk," he mumbled. His mind, his chest, his hands and legs were humming. Whatever Hermione was doing, it didn't distract her effectively. And he wasn't exactly at ease either; he couldn't sit still any longer.

A few minutes later, Dumbledore and he crossed the quiet and deserted grounds. Being on the move, the wind rustling in the trees, birds, bees and the crunching of gravel under his feet - all of that was almost instantly soothing his nerves. And the summer break quiet was as well, at least for the first few days. Then it would steadily grow more unsettling, infused with the illusion of being the last people on earth just because the students were at home. But right now it was still soothing. Severus took a deep breath. "Tell me what kind of potion you gave Hermione to save my life," he eventually resumed their conversation.

"Why do you want to know?" the Headmaster asked again.

Severus scowled at him. "Because she is still in my bloody head, Albus! I need to know what purpose this connection has. I need to … understand it!" He crossed his arms in front of his chest.

The crunching of their steps seemed to grow louder while Albus kept silent. He frowned and Severus knew what struggles were happening behind his forehead. Albus collected information like other people collected stamps. And he was more paranoid than even Alastor Moody. It didn't help that after all these years he still didn't trust Severus completely. Eventually, he sighed. "I didn't expect the connection to remain active this long."

"You already said that much," Severus countered without looking at him. "Why is it still active, Albus?"

Again he remained silent for a long time. Then he said: "The potion Miss Granger used to save your life is called Devoted to You."

Severus knitted his brows. He'd never heard of it. But he didn't say anything. Albus was finally inclined to share this slice of information, he wouldn't remind him why he was always so reluctant to do so.

"Nicholas Flamel developed it, I found the recipe and his notes about it in his estate. There are several developments amongst it he never published and I intend to leave it at that." He looked at him pointedly and Severus nodded. Albus took a deep breath. "The marriage of Nicholas and Perenelle was … occasionally difficult. They spent centuries with each other, conflicts are inevitable in such a long time. But both of them wanted their marriage to work, neither wanted someone else at their side."

Severus swallowed. He started to understand and briefly closed his eyes. "A love potion, Albus?"

"No, Devoted to You is not a love potion. On the contrary, it needs some kind of love to work. It creates the connection you and Miss Granger are currently experiencing to resolve conflicts. Usually, both parties involved take it. It can be very helpful to sense the emotions of each other to understand what the problems are and how to get them out of the way."

"How can this potion be effective against Necare conctanter?" The curse was dark to the core, killing painfully slowly, usually as mercilessly and irreversible as Avada kedavra, only with a lot of pain and agony. The Dark Lord had been excited when he found it.

Albus smiled, his blue eyes twinkled behind his glasses, and Severus knew, his answer would let him roll his eyes. "Because it works with love, Severus."

He rolled his eyes.

"Love is stronger than Dark Magic, we already witnessed it, didn't we? The potion had to keep you alive to be able to do its work."

"So it was just a stab in the dark?" Severus asked.

Albus raised his shoulders. "I struck gold. And you had nothing at all to lose so why shouldn't I have tried?"

Severus rubbed his forehead. "Fine. When the potion has only been a means to an end, why did it have to be Hermione's blood? Why did you have to let me feel her emotions of all people?"

"I could hardly let you feel my emotions, Severus. The mere memory of it could have drawn Voldemort's attention. I could not risk it."

Severus snorted. Right, who else might feel some kind of love for him?

"Apart from that …" The Headmaster hesitated and crossed his arms behind his back while they were walking beneath some big trees, their leaves painting whirling shadows on the ground. "… Miss Granger loves you enough to ensure a sufficiently long effect of the potion."

Severus frowned. "How did you even hit on that?"

Albus clicked his tongue. "I saw her standing by your bed. She reminded me of you." He looked at him with an expression Severus had never seen on his face before. "The night you begged me to save Lily you looked just like her."

Severus swallowed and averted his gaze.

Albus lapsed into silence again. It took some time until he turned to Severus and said: "Severus, this connection still remains active because you and Miss Granger … suit each other."

He yanked his head around and looked at him derisively. "Don't be ridiculous!"

"I am not. As I said there were notes accompanying the recipe. Mary-Ann and Edward, the children of Nicholas and Perenelle, had great difficulties with each other. Sibling rivalry, worse than …" He broke off. "They fought each other tooth and nail. Nicholas and Perenelle were so desperate they tried this potion but the connection didn't even last for two hours. They just did not suit each other, there was no chance they would ever really understand each other. They had no common ground."

Severus's head started humming again, his heart pounding heavily. "What are you trying to say, Albus? That Hermione and I are meant for each other?" He snorted disparagingly.

"I say nothing more than … there is a foundation for you. And I am the last person to have expected it. I did hope Miss Granger's love for you would be strong enough for the connection to last for a few days. Long enough to ultimately render the curse ineffective. I did not anticipate this."

"Yes, I got that," Severus growled. "And what am I supposed to do about it now?"

Albus shook his head. "Whatever you want – as long as you do not forget what has to be done. You know the situation in the Wizarding World, you know your mission. You know what you are able to accomplish. It should no longer be a problem to magically sever the connection now. The curse has long dissolved, it will no longer kill you. It is up to you which path you choose." He came to a halt and a little smile played around his lips when he added: "However, I am under the impression Miss Granger does you well. Devoting yourself to genuine emotions does you well. I would only wish for you to be able to experience it without the influence of Voldemort."

Severus wrinkled his nose. "I'd wish I wouldn't have to experience it at all."

Albus's eyebrows twitched but he didn't reply. He didn't have to, the mischief in his blue eyes said enough.

"Do Flamel's notes reveal what circumstances are necessary for the connection to dissolve if I won't do it magically?"

"It will dissolve as soon as the conflicts are resolved," Albus said. "If there is a foundation the potion is effective until both participants have got their issues straightened out with each other."

Severus laughed mirthlessly. The Dark Lord rather dressed up as Father Christmas and gave presents to Muggle children than Hermione and he straighten anything out with each other. He rubbed his temple. And suddenly remembered Lucius's remarks towards Hermione. "I assume I soon will be called to a meeting. Lucius is obviously confident of me just feigning my injuries and it won't take him long to convince the Dark Lord."

"I expected as much."

"Yes," Severus said in a low voice.

"Well, however you decide to handle the connection, Severus – you and Miss Granger should sort out the matter of her current absence." He turned around and slowly went back to the castle. Severus watched him sourly.

Patty had told him Hermione was at the lake and so Severus left his office at sunset to sort out the matter of her absence, as Albus had so elegantly put it. The castle's shadow covered the lake completely, the dark-blue night sky drew nearer above the Forbidden Forest, and the first stars became visible. Hermione was a black silhouette in front of the rippling surface of the water. Again, she was sitting on the jetty, her feet tucked into the lake.

Severus approached her so quietly she only noticed him when he leaned against one of the pillars, his arms crossed in front of his chest. She flinched and gasped his name. Her shock went through him as well and Severus rolled his eyes. "We have to talk," he said in a low voice.

She swallowed thickly, pulled her feet out of the water and leaned back against the pillar opposite him. But she didn't rise. She just looked up at him as if she awaited his verdict.

"Was it only Lucius making you so furious yesterday?" he asked.

"No," she said quietly and lowered her gaze. "He's a bastard and he is pushing my buttons every single time, but … I was also unbelievably furious at …" Her voice faded.

"Me?" Severus offered.

She nodded, it was hardly visible in the darkness. "I'm so tired of you knowing everything about me, Severus. I am … completely exposed to you, emotionally naked. I'm at your mercy and … it is so exhausting." She sniffed and wiped her nose.

Severus frowned. "No Occlumency, Hermione," he growled.

She snorted. "See? That's what I mean." But she did as he told her.

A huge wave of … Severus exhaled slowly. He didn't know which name to tack on this emotion but it was unbearable. It knotted his bowels and suffocated him and he wanted it to stop. He rubbed his forehead until it subsided a little. Eventually, he cleared his throat. "Albus finally told me about the potion."

She looked at him.

"It is called Devoted to You, Nicholas Flamel developed it. Its purpose is exactly this connection. It is meant to resolve conflicts."

Hermione stared at him. "How was such a potion able to save your life?"

He rolled his eyes. "Love," was the only thing he said and he did it with as much disdain as humanly possible.

To his surprise, Hermione snorted again. "Of course … I don't think though anything is able to resolve our conflicts," she muttered and drew her fingers through her hair.

Severus clenched his teeth so intensely his jaw hurt before he could bring himself to say, "Well, the potion obviously thinks there is a … foundation for us." Again, she looked at him, the low light painting bright spots in her eyes. "Or else the connection would have long dissolved."

Hermione kept silent but her emotions spoke volumes. Severus's heart began thumping rapidly, he felt as if he was high on some drug. "A foundation," she then mumbled hollowly.

"That's what I said," he growled.

She swallowed. "And …" She broke off and adrenaline rocked his body when another wave of her emotions billowed against his mind. "And do you … want to use this foundation?"

"I don't know." He averted his eyes and looked over the lake, trying to calm his breath in order to dull his own bodily reactions to Hermione's emotions. It didn't work so he blocked her out just to be able to think clearly for a second, but not even that helped! It took him startingly long to realise it was his own emotions that afflicted him. What the hell … He cleared his throat. "Albus said we could magically sever the connection now, it won't kill me anymore."

"Do you want to do that?" she asked faintly.

Severus opened his mouth to answer but the words he wanted to say wouldn't come. "I don't know," he repeated instead. "Do you want to do it?"

Now Hermione rose and dabbed the jetty's dust from her trousers before she leaned against a pillar with crossed arms, just like him. "Ten minutes ago I'd instantly have said yes."

"What changed?"

"The foundation," she said quietly. Severus sighed. "I know, Severus! I know. You'll never reciprocate my feelings, I didn't forget." She stopped as if she wanted to give him a chance to object. He didn't. "But to resolve conflicts you don't have to love me, do you?"

"I don't think so."

"Maybe we should … give it a go? We will have to work on these potions for some time to come. It could be of help to have a … foundation for it."

Severus remained silent. It was his job to make decisions. Hard decisions that could cost lives and decide the outcome of the war. He was good at these decisions. He'd let people die because it had been necessary. He'd lied to the Dark Lord because it had been necessary. He'd never exposed himself to anybody surrounding him because it had been necessary. But this decision … The decision for or against Hermione in his head … For or against finding a foundation … For or against an opportunity he'd never thought he would get … he wasn't able to make it.

"Severus, I'm sorry about what I did yesterday. I went too far and I'm ashamed of myself."

"I know," he said hoarsely. It wasn't hard for him to believe her apology and for a moment he wished he was able to apologise like that. Again, it was his emotions taking his breath away. He raised his gaze and by now it had gotten so dark he could hardly see Hermione anymore. Maybe that was the reason why he said what he said. That he said: "Let's build a foundation."