My son always had a good natured, easy-going, laid back personality. He never much liked confrontation and did his best to avoid it at any and all costs, so it often frustrated me to no end seeing those aspects of his nature colliding with the wall of resistance that was Quinn Fabray.

It was still pretty early at the start of their sophomore school year and Finn and Quinn (no really, I'll never get over the absurd rhyming thing) hadn't been getting along well at all anymore – or at least not for any real length of time.

When they first started dating that summer, there was a skip in his step, an eagerness to spend time with her, and an obvious light in his eyes when he talked about her. He was thrilled to go out of his way to make her happy. Over time I watched the skip become more and more leanden, and the joy of seeing her fade into the chore of appeasing her. The light burned out pretty quickly.

She would come to the house and half the length of a movie is about as long as I'd see them make it before she'd say something that he'd roll his eyes about or excuse himself to the bathroom or offer to drive her home. I'd never ONCE heard her say she was sorry or try to retract or clarify her comments to make him feel any better. It just felt like this dark, suffocating cloud hanging around them all the time.

Or he'd go to see her, leaving me with his typical happy smile and come home a few hours later looking like he just returned from combat training, ragged and tired. Sometimes he'd go straight for the comfort of his room and the door slam behind him was my only greeting. Other times I wouldn't even know he was back until I heard the drums smashing away.

But that was just the everyday uncomfortable nature that their relationship had grown into. It seemed like she wanted things from him that he felt were unreasonable, and he wanted her to relax and be more understanding about something but she wasn't giving in to him.

I still didn't know what this growing divide between them was all about (I PRAYED it wasn't sex, and that he wasn't pressuring her – not that I think he would, but I couldn't help myself worrying about it), but clearly something was the catalyst behind this change in their dynamic and he still wasn't telling me what it was yet.

Then there were the more serious scenarios where he was really upset and they were actually screaming on the phone at each other for half an hour or more (usually resulting in her hanging up on him and him unleashing a stream of profanities).

Sometimes he'd just be in a dark, irritable mood, and I remember thinking sometimes it was because of her, but most times I believe he was upset with himself. I could always tell by his posture and general demeanor when they were fighting. The drums got louder, the dirty clothes and dishes remained in his room, as did he... A couple of times he even mouthed off to me (before quickly regaining his senses and apologizing, but still not explaining what was going on).

I know she's pretty and they had their popularity going on, and from the way Noah described things, there seemed to be a lot of social pressure and expectations on Finn, but I just couldn't understand why he was making himself so miserable over this one girl. Was there truly no better choice for a girlfriend in that entire school than Quinn Fabray? My son could likely have his pick of girls in probably all of Lima – though honestly, I'd rather have seen him single, alone and carefree again than dealing with someone who constantly pulled his mood down the way that girl did.

His mood swings were becoming too complicated to keep up with as the school year progressed... And then suddenly there was yet another change in him.

Yes, the muffled sounds of drums were still smashing away from the garage almost nightly (oh yes – I'd finally put my foot down about them being in my living room a few years earlier. There was sadly barely enough space for HIM in his bedroom – but also, I needed the distance to dampen the noise more – especially when I need to sleep for work, so the basement was out and the garage it would have to be), but one afternoon right after school, I swore I heard him singing, too. SINGING, at the top of his lungs!

And it's not just that he was singing, it's WHAT he was singing... I'm not big into Broadway or anything, but I swear my son was singing and drumming along to show tunes.

I had to go out to the garage to see it for myself and yes, sure enough... headphones on, arms flailing away to the beat and the words just poured out of him like he was born that way.

Find one song, A song about love
Glory, From the soul of a young man
A young man

Find,the one song
Before the virus takes hold
Glory - Like a sunset
One song, To redeem this empty life

Finn's always loved music – all kinds of music, but of course he gravitated toward classic rock, alternative rock and heavy metal genres more than anything. When he played the drums, the most he might ever do was mutter along the chorus of the song under his breath between the beats, but most of the time his tongue was sticking out to the side in concentration. (He truly has the most adorable 'drum faces' I've ever seen.) I've never heard him belting out a full song at top volume like that before. This was something totally new.

I'd only ever heard him sing out loud that way at Christmas to Jingle Bell Rock in the car, or Alvin and the Chipmunks maybe... but this was a song from Rent (I only recognized it because I'd just watched the movie recently).

And he was AMAZING. My son can sing!

After getting my stunned bearings together, I realized he'd finished the song and was yanking out his earphones when he saw me standing there with my mouth hanging open.

"Sorry Mom, did I wake you up?"

"Finn... No, honey, no it's okay, I wasn't sleeping, but.. oh my goodness, Finn! When did you learn to sing like that?"

"Uh.. I um, I dunno. W-why, do you think it was any good? Sorry if I was being too loud, I probably just upset Mr Jenkins next door again... I'll go apolo–"

"GOOD? Finn, that was incredible! Don't you dare ever apologize to anyone for singing like that! Mr Jenkins can turn off his hearing aids if he can't appreciate it!"

His smile nearly split his face and which lit up like a lightning bug in July. "Yeah? You really think so? Like, you're not just saying that 'cause you're my Mom and you're supposed to?"

"Of course I'm not just telling you that. But... why that song honey? That's not one of your typical rock music favorites. Led Zeppelin, Dashboard Confessional or Jimmy Eat World I'd expect; not the Rent soundtrack."

"Oh, well... It's um. It's k-kinda like homework? I guess?"

"Homework? What on earth class are you taking that assigns musicals as homework?"

"Oh, well it's uh, not a class really, well I mean it is, but it's not. It's ... okay, see I joined a new club. It's for that. And Mr Schue told me I should practice this, and said if I can drum to it while singing, all the better."

"Mr Schue.. As in Schuester? Your Spanish teacher?"

"Yeah yeah, that's him. He's pretty cool too. Anyway, he's in charge of the glee club, so he assigned me this homework on account of me being a little late to join, and he thinks it'll help me catch up with the others. Especially Rachel."

Rachel? GLEE CLUB? What the—

"When did you join a Glee club, Finn? And why is this the first I'm hearing about it?"

"Uh... well... I.. It was a snap decision just out of the blue, like a week or two ago. Mr Schue heard me singing in the shower and–"

"Excuse me?"

"Like, in the boys locker room after practice. I guess he needed to see Coach for something and I was jamming to some sick REO, and he heard me and asked me to join the club."

"Just like that? Because you were singing in the shower."

"Well yeah. The club needs more people I guess."

"Is this why you suddenly found an incessant love for the Grease movie soundtrack?"

I watched this change come over his face, an odd mix of emotions flashed in his eyes. It was something I'd never seen before and he sat struggling to find his words for a minute.

"Th-that was... uh, yeah, it was for my first audition with the whole club. I was really pretty nervous, on account of I'd never sung with other people like that before, especially strangers. I mean, I didn't know anyone in the club, not really."

There was an odd heaviness in his words and they trailed off a little at the end. I wasn't sure what that meant, but I was sure there was a strain in his voice; it almost sounded like regret.

"Oh... so you've met some new kids? You're making new friends then?"

"Ah... y-yeah. Friends. I think at first they weren't too sure about me joining them. They uh, they don't exactly hang out with my group of friends, y'know? They mostly like musicals and plays and stuff like that, stuff most of my friends probably wouldn't be too cool about me taking an interest in, because these kids are not... well they just aren't like my other friends at all."

I could still see the tension in his expression. I'd say he was wearing his guilty face again but had no idea why. Did he feel like he was trading one group of friends for another? Or maybe these musical play loving new kids who weren't friends with his crowd and the thing he was trying to say but didn't want to voice out loud was that they were the losers and nerds of the school. And here he was, the leader of the coolest group, hanging out singing with them all of a sudden.

I have to admit, even I thought it was odd... But maybe it was just what he needed.

A moment of clarity hit me at that moment. This must be the friction that had been rubbing between him and Quinn. It was probably also the likely cause of this revolving door of dark emotions that'd been overcoming his mood. He'd been struggling with doing something for himself despite his friend's and girlfriend's wishes.

"Well honey, I think it's wonderful that you are making new friends and trying something new... So, do you like it? You like being in this club?"

"I dunno, I thought it would be the lamest thing on earth, and maybe it is... but. But I dunno. I could maybe like it, maybe even a lot? I mean, I'm not as good at it as the other kids, definitely NOWHERE NEAR as good as Rachel, but... well, I'm the only one who plays drums. And maybe if I practice I can be really good at it like some of them are, especially Rachel."

There was that name again. I wondered if she wore leg warmers and knee socks. Perhaps the Hurricane just got a name?

I had to temper my excitement and play it cool, you know, the nonchalant sneaky mom tactic of extracting information without seeming too eager.

"Who's Rachel? I guess she's in the club too?"

"Oh! Yeah, Rachel, Rachel Berry. She's the female lead and Mom, you'll never believe how good she sings, wait til you hear her one of these days. I'm serious, you won't believe your ears! Like, I thought I was listening to the radio the first time I heard her voice, but then I sang with her myself so I know she's not pulling a Milli Vanilli thing and lip-syncing or whatever. She's the real deal, just SO super talented. She wants to be on Broadway one day, 'cause she's some kind of an.. inge.. ingenuity or whatever, but I can promise you with her voice she will be a huge star one day."

Ingenuity? Well, I didn't know what that meant exactly (Finn's vocabulary always was a little on the colorfully creative side), but based on the rapid fire response that spilled out of my son in one breath and the fact that his face was like a glow worm as he talked about her, I guessed my prediction was correct: Hurricane Rachel had made landfall indeed.

I just smiled knowingly.

"That sounds amazing, Finn. She sounds very talented."

"Aw Mom she is, you have no idea! And she said she thinks I'm talented too, and she would know. Y'know, because she is."

I smiled to myself, somehow just knowing this wasn't going to be the last I'd be hearing the name Rachel Berry in our house. The look on his face reminded me of the day I first confided in Betty about my feelings for Christopher.

Still, all his obvious interest in this new club and this new girl aside, it made me wonder about another name that seemed very absent from this conversation so far.

"So... did Quinn join the club with you? Or does she know about you joining?"

"Quinn? Oh, heck no! She thinks this club is for losers and it's gonna bring down my rep and hers too, like, social suicide or whatever. I told her to just get over herself, that everything would be okay. I mean, I'm the quarterback, right? People are supposed to think whatever I THINK is cool is cool... right?"

"Well, that's not really the best way to look at things, Finn. Sure, I suppose being the quarterback naturally makes you a trendsetter of sorts, but I hope you don't simply expect people to just be drones and follow you blindly. Good leaders have to earn the trust of their followers, you know. But I am happy to hear you're standing up for something you want for a change. So... I take it Quinn isn't happy that you're in this club, but you're going to stay in it anyway?"

"Yeah. I mean, for now anyway I guess. I want to. And Quinn, she's just... well, you know how she gets sometimes."

"Yes, I certainly do."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

I tried not to sound too bitter but I guess my mask slipped a little. I couldn't help myself; the contrast between him talking about this new Rachel girl and him talking about Quinn, well it was SO black and white.

"Nothing sweetheart. I'm just proud of you for standing up for yourself and doing something YOU want, no matter what anyone else thinks. You can be your own man, honey. You're right, you are the quarterback, which does make you a leader. And you ARE a leader sweetie, not a follower. Try to remember that."

"Thanks Mom, yeah. I'll try... I mean, I don't know what'll happen if Puck and the guys from the team find out about Glee though. I've kinda been hiding it from them for now. I don't think they're gonna like it too much either..."

"But Noah is your friend, honey. You think he wouldn't understand?"

"Are you joking? You know Puck... he'll probably lead the charge razzing me over it... But that stuff you said about being a leader not a follower, and earning people's trust? I want to be like that. It's just not that easy sometimes."

"Mhmm, I'm sure it isn't. But if being a leader was easy, everyone would do it. And as the leader who I know you are and have the potential to be, it bothers me a little the way Quinn tends to get you to do everything her way all the time."

"Not all the time."

"No, maybe not all the time, but... oh sweetheart, I'm just happy to see you happy with something you like doing. I hope you don't let her or anyone else bring you down or talk you out of it."

"Quinn's just... she worries a lot about our image and what people at school think. And she wants to be prom queen next year, so she says we have to start 'setting an example' now... whatever."

"Are you still not into the whole idea of running for prom king? I thought I heard you two fighting about that, among other things..."

"No, no I really don't care about that stuff the way she does. It does bug me the way she feels like she needs it to be somebody special or whatever, but y'know, I guess maybe she's right. Maybe it's just one of those chick things, so it's more important to girls than guys, and I should just suck it up and do this for her to make her happy."

"Okay, well I don't mean to argue or upset you, but you know, the same could be said for her regarding this new club of yours. Compromise in relationships is important, Finn; if you really respect and care about someone, you should want them to be happy too. So she could just suck it up and let you be happy in this new club. But I'm curious... if this Glee club is so unpopular – and I happen to know how much you hate Spanish – then I'm still unclear as to what made you decide to just agree to join so easily, just because Mr Schuester asked you to. Is there something more you're not telling me?"

I knew by the look on his face when he first started telling me about this club he was hiding something. It must be something big too, because Finn is a terrible liar. He always wears his guilt on his sleeve whether he means to or not, especially with me.

"Fine, okay, he basically said I HAD to join the club so I wouldn't get in trouble. But, look Mom, I SWEAR TO YOU I didn't do it, the stuff wasn't even mine! I have no clue how it got in my locker and I don't know what it even is exactly or who it really belongs to!"

Uh-huh, I KNEW it. "Slow down Finn, what stuff? So something was in your locker... what was it and why would you get in trouble for it?"

"Um... I guess it's.. aw man, you're totally gonna freak, but please, I wish you wouldn't... Mr Schue said it was called The Chronic Lady and I think it's some kinda drugs, marijuana maybe, but Mom, Mom I SWEAR ON MY XBOX it wasn't mine! I offered to take a pee test to prove that I don't do drugs and he–"

Drugs!?

"Of course you don't do drugs! I know that, Finn! But how the hell did it get into your locker? Was it Noah? I'll call Norah right now and–"

"No no, Mom, please! I don't think it was Puck's either. At first I thought it could be, but I asked him about the Chronic Lady and he said he hadn't met her yet but he planned to. So I don't think it's his."

Yeah, I was still going to be calling Norah.

"Okay, so clear this up for me, Finn. Your teacher found drugs in your locker, and then asked you to join this club? That doesn't make sense."

"Well, it was glee or detention for like, the rest of my life. He said if I picked glee he could keep this off my record and wouldn't tell Figgins. And honestly, this club didn't seem like such a bad idea anyway..."

"In other words he gave you a choice and you chose the club. Well that was very considerate of him. But I want to know how the drugs ended up in your locker to begin with."

"Could you just like, not focus on that please? Mr Schue was cool enough to let it drop, and I think you should too. He said I remind him of himself when he was young, and he sees something in me. He thinks I have potential I guess... but he also said I could lose a football scholarship that I didn't know I had. Which reminds me I still need to ask Coach about that. But hey, I'll pee for you to prove the drugs weren't mine."

"Don't be ridiculous, Finn. I happen to know your football physicals alone are proof that you don't use drugs, plus I just know you. I trust you wouldn't do something that unhealthy, reckless and irresponsible. But if someone was trying to set you up and make you take the fall, then I think we need to know. That said... I'll trust your judgment for now and leave it up to Mr Schuester's discretion to resolve the matter himself. Although, I think I'll be giving him a call soon. I should've been informed about this sooner–"

"Mom please don't! It's enough that I'm in this club, and I don't know if Principal Figgins would go along with Mr Schue's ideas or not, so maybe it's best to just let it go, okay? Mr Schue's looking out for me now. And, well, it's kinda cool. He's becoming kinda like a mentor I guess... and I'd really like to keep him on my side, so I don't want him to get in trouble either."

This teacher must have really made an impression on my son. He was talking about him with so much reverence that I couldn't help but do as Finn asked. Especially since his grandfathers both passed, Finn hasn't ever really had a positive male role model so close to him. His uncles certainly love him, but they both live very far away now, one in Europe and one in California.

"Fine. But I'm not happy at the prospect of anyone taking advantage of you, Finn. So tell me more about glee."

"I mean, I've only been to a couple club meetings so far. But Mr Schue says if we get good enough, we can compete for a National title. It's a really big deal, winning show choir championships, I guess. But uh, we're going to see our rivals at Carmel High as like a field trip next week. Their club is hosting an open invitational, so we're gonna, y'know go scope out the competition and stuff."

"Oh wow, that sounds like fun. Is this other club supposed to be any good?"

"Yeah I guess. Mr Schue said they've won a bunch of titles, and Rachel seems really jazzed about the one girl in their club who's like her major competition or her idol or something. I don't know why Rachel thinks she has ANY competition – that Carmel girl can't possibly sing as good as she does."

I just smiled when I saw that look bloom across his face again. I hope he figures it out soon.

"Last week I got the club to listen to me and we did this really kick-ass version of a Journey song, you know, Don't Stop Believin', and Mr Schue loved it and said we could use it for competitions. I was pretty pumped when he said that since it was my idea and all... I'm thinking there's no way these Vocal Adrenaline jerks can pull off a rad Journey song like we do. But I guess we'll see."

Competitions or no, this little club full of misfits sounded exactly like a good place for my son to be. I'd never seen him so enthusiastic about anything since he first learned to play drums. Getting a new mentor out of the deal just seemed like an added bonus. And this Rachel girl... Well, I figured I was just going to have to see her for myself to learn what was sparking these new emotions in my son.

I also wondered how long it was going to take until he realized what those emotions were all about. Finn and his confusion about the fairer sex was definitely not going to be of help to him... so if I needed to be the little extra guidance or push he needed, well, that's what I would be.

But first thing's first: I needed to do a little reconnaissance myself and scope out Quinn Fabray's competition.