A/N TRIGGER WARNING FOR DESCRIPTIONS OF SEXUAL ABUSE! This chapter is very serious and very heavy, so please be cautious while reading. Also, if anyone out there - male, female, whoever - ever finds themselves in a bad situation such as this the following number is one of the nation's largest anti-sexual violence organizations, 1800-656-HOPE. Don't hesitate to call. Rape is real and it is serious.

This chapter's title was named after the song Face Down sung by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. Please read, review, and let me know how you're enjoying the story. Also, thank you DeVara_Lavellan for letting Nira and Ashala make an appearance in this story.

Elyssa felt like she couldn't breathe. She couldn't leave school yet, but she no longer had Solas's classroom as her haven. She wandered through the arts hall and heard someone in the music room playing the piano. It was a song she had listened to often, ever since Solas had seen her scars for the first time.

She looked through the door to see Miss Mahariel, the choir director. A woman sat in one of the metal chairs playing the cello and Miss Mahariel was singing the song beautifully. Elyssa began to sing to herself, thinking she was singing quietly enough no one could hear. The piano stopped suddenly. Her breath caught in her throat as the director came out of her classroom and saw her standing there, looking nervous.

"Sweetie, was that you? You sing beautifully! Please, join us? I'm Nira," she said brightly, her flame-red hair pulled back from her face, revealing pointed Elven ears. Elyssa froze. Everyone knew Nira was a locally famous performer. She had been dying to go to Club Fen to see Nira and her band, The Inquisition, perform.

"Um, I, uh…" Elyssa hated it when she stammered. Nira merely smiled.

"It's okay to be nervous, I'm always nervous before a performance. It's just us girls, yeah? Come on." Nira tugged on her sleeve, pulling her into the choir room. She set her bag near the risers, her sketchbook falling partially out of the halfway zipped bag. She looked warily at the woman in the metal chair. She knew of Nira, she was a teacher here after all, but she had never seen the other woman before.

"Hello, dear. I'm Ahshala. Who might you be?" she asked, nothing but kindness in her voice.

"Elyssa," she whispered.

"Well, Elyssa, you sounded like you could be a soprano, maybe… second soprano? Let's start from the beginning, and you jump in when you feel comfortable, okay?" Nira suggested. Elyssa nodded. She didn't know why, but she wasn't as uncomfortable around her as she was with other adults.

Nira played the beginning of the song and Elyssa let all the pain she was feeling bubble to the surface. She had had a moment of peace, she had had a taste of love. Real love. When she told Solas she loved him, it wasn't an obligation like it was with Anders. She loved Solas for his compassion, his humor, his desires. She closed her eyes and let herself go back to that night, to those things she had felt as Solas moved inside her. To the feelings that had been there since that first day he had shared his lunch with her, a girl he knew nothing about and had no obligation to help. To the moment he had seen her arms and tried to understand, something no one else had ever done. To the jokes, the laughter, the smiling blue eyes she loved so dearly.

" Don't tear me down for all I need. Make my heart a better place. Give me something I can believe. Don't tear me down. You've opened the door now, don't let it close…"

Nira looked at Elyssa with concern, then raised her eyebrows at Ahshala.

"I'm here on the edge again. I wish I could let it go. I know I'm only one step away, from turning it around. Can you still see the heart of me? All my agony fades away when you hold me in your embrace"

He would never embrace her again. He had told her it was a mistake. It would never happen again. She was beautiful, rare, marvelous, and not enough. She would never be enough. Tears were rolling down Elyssa's cheeks as she finished the song with Nira. Nira stepped around the piano, a firm, knowing look on her face.

"Anyone, you want to talk about?" Nira asked gently. Elyssa twisted her sleeve in her hand.

"It's stupid," she said quietly.

"Look at me, Elyssa. Nothing about loving someone, or feeling the way you do is in any way wrong. My husband is, well, let's just say he's one of a kind. People thought that I was being careless by being with a much older man, and now I am Bonded to the man I know I'm going to spend the rest of my life with," Nira told her with a wistful smile. Elyssa looked up at the music teacher when she had said she was Bonded and finally noticed the vallaslin on her cheeks.

"How… how much older?" she asked.

"Oh, um, fifteen years. Was the song for someone older than you?" Nira raised her eyebrows at the young girl.

"I have to go," she whispered, and grabbed her bag, bolting for the door that led outside instead of back in the hallway. Nira had seen right through her. How?

Solas had stupidly followed Elyssa into the music hall. He had wanted to make sure she was okay, he knew she hated being alone. He stopped outside the double doors leading in and saw her lean against the wall, just outside of the choir room. He was about to walk in when the fiery hair of Nira Mahariel came out of the room, seeing Elyssa standing there. The women spoke and Elyssa followed her into the practice room. He quietly slipped through the doors, hearing Elyssa and Nira speaking, then another woman he didn't recognize the voice of. Then the piano started and he heard Elyssa begin singing. The words she sang hit him in all of the most vulnerable places of his cracking armor. The women finished the song and Nira asked Elyssa a question he couldn't quite make out. Then he heard the doors on the other side of the choir room open and slam shut, the sound of it bringing him back to the night of the Homecoming dance.

"The poor girl. Whoever she sang for, she needs him more than she would ever readily admit," he heard Nira say to the other woman.

"Should I go after her, miss? She did seem rather distraught,"

"No, Ahshala. Thank you though. I'll ask around and see if the other teachers know her. Maybe start with Solas, I think she's one of his students. She had a sketchbook with her. I'll ask him before the end of the day." Shit…

You are so beautiful… I can't, I'm sorry… The words Solas had said to her yesterday kept playing through her head over and over again, shattering her heart each time. She was glad school was over with until Monday. She wouldn't be faced with him again until then. The semester was almost over and then she could avoid him. Tears rolled onto her cheeks, causing her to growl in frustration. She had cried so much these past couple days. She never cried this much over Anders. Anders… she had been unfaithful to him. He never made her feel like Solas had, but that didn't mean he deserved to be cheated on. She needed to make things right with him. She needed to break up with him, let him move on to find someone who could love him like she just never truly was able to.

She didn't work until Friday, so she decided to visit Anders at school. Her mother had no objections, she adored Anders. The campus was huge, but he had given her his address, so it wasn't hard to find once she knew which building was which. She found the door to his dorm room and knocked, hearing two male voices on the other side of the door. She took a quick step backward when Justice, not Anders, answered the door. She had never been comfortable with Justice. The way he stared down at her like he detested her very existence, didn't sit well with her. Anders had changed since he had become friends with Justice. He had become angrier, more easily frustrated, irritable. It had only gotten worse when they had gone away to college together.

"Anders, you got a visitor!" he called over his shoulder, his words slurring. Elyssa could smell the alcohol from the hallway. "So, what brings you here?" Justice asked her. There was the sound of a bottle hitting the floor before Anders came into view.

"Elyssa, what are you doing here?" he asked. She shuffled her feet. She didn't like Anders when he was drunk.

"I wanted to talk to you, that's all. I can go-" she replied quietly.

"No! It's… okay. Come on in! I forgot you haven't seen our dorm room! Want a drink?" he stated and asked loudly as she walked past Justice. He shut the door behind them and she heard the telltale sound of a lock sliding into place.

"Um, no thank you," she said, sitting in a plush armchair. Anders came back over with two plastic cups in his hands and shoved one of them in her face.

"Come on, loosen up a little!" Justice said from her left. Her hand shook as she took the cup and let herself have a small sip. It was sweet, like peaches and pineapple, and she didn't taste the harsh bite of alcohol, so maybe it was okay. Anders smiled at her as she took a larger drink and set it on the coffee table.

"Really looking forward to Thanksgiving," he told her, "your mom is such a great cook." Elyssa forced herself to smile and nodded her head. She grabbed the cup again and took another drink. She felt so uncomfortable right now. Her throat kept going dry and her mouth felt like cotton, so she kept taking small sips while Justice and Anders talked about one of their classes, and joked around with each other.

"Anders, I-" She couldn't finish due to Anders cutting her off.

"I'm really glad you came to visit. Hanging out with this asshole all day gets boring," Anders goaded his friend, who responded with a punch to his arm. Elyssa smiled and leaned on Anders.

"Well, I-I needed to talk to you," she said, her words feeling thick in her mouth. Anders frowned.

"Okay, the room's this way," he said, looking at Justice and shrugging. Elyssa and Anders walked into his room and he shut the door. "What's wrong now?" he asked, rolling his eyes. Tears pooled in her eyes and she played with the hem of her sleeve nervously.

"Um, I needed to-to tell you that I-I-" she stammered before Anders sighed in irritation.

"Will you stop stuttering and just tell me what's wrong? We are being rude to my friend, you know," he said, crossing his arms.

"I slept with someone else!" she said louder than she wanted to.

"What do you mean?" Anders growled.

"I-I cheated on you Anders," she whispered, "I didn't mean to, it just happened." Why couldn't she explain this better?

"Elyssa, you don't just accidentally fall into bed with someone else!" Anders huffed.

It wasn't a bed per se, but still, he had a point. "I didn't intend to sleep with someone else." There that was a better explanation.

"You know, Justice never approved of my obsession with you," Anders sighed, "he said you were a distraction. That I was meant for something better than taking care of a broken girl."

His words stung, but at this point she deserved them. She didn't even regret sleeping with Solas. She felt guilty for technically being with Anders when she did, yes, but she hadn't been in love with Anders for a long time if ever.

"I disagreed with him at first. Thanks for making me look like an idiot," he growled sarcastically. Elyssa didn't say anything as he opened the door and left the room.

Elyssa went to sit on the couch and put her face in her hands. Anders led Justice into his room, his expression anything but happy. She knew that he was telling him what she had done. She didn't know why she was crying over this, she still didn't regret it. She jumped when Justice and Anders walked out of the room, Anders disappearing somewhere into their dorm. Elyssa finished her drink and felt more relaxed. Justice turned on their stereo and went to the kitchen where she could hear him shuffling around, the sounds of clinking glass and sloshing liquid into cups. He came back to the couch and handed her another drink.

"You look like you could use this. Shit happens, you know?" he said. Elyssa took a large drink from the cup Justice had handed her. It was sweeter than what she was drinking earlier. Something in his hard blue eyes made Elyssa nervous. She wished she could put her finger on what exactly it was.

"I did-didn't mean to hurt him. It jus' sort of happened," she replied, her tongue twisting in her mouth. Suddenly, a bass-heavy song came on and Justice leaped to his feet.

"C'mon, let's dance!" he said with a smile that for some reason didn't seem very friendly. Elyssa shook her head. The last thing she wanted to do right now was stumble around clumsily with Justice. She wanted to leave, but she was so dizzy. Hopefully, her head would clear enough to drive soon. "You might as well take your mind off things," he said, yanking Elyssa to her feet. Elyssa stumbled and fell against Justice.

"Whoa there, easy now!" he laughed. His laugh seemed off somehow. Her entire being was screaming at her to leave, to getaway. She had done what she came here to do. She told Anders what had happened between her and Solas. Why was she still here? She laughed with him, trying to make the situation less awkward, and they moved around the couch to the more open area between the kitchen and the front door. While she danced with Justice, she wondered where Anders had gone. The bathroom, maybe? Her mind was fogging and control over her movements was becoming difficult. She found that she was having to lean on Justice to stay upright.

"Whe-where's Anders? I-I don' feel… so well…" she slurred. She barely registered Justice's hands reaching for the hem of her shirt and tried to pull away.

"Then you should lay down and get comfortable, you're going to be here a while," he said through clenched teeth, steering her toward one of the rooms off of the main living room. He let her down on the bed and she fell over onto the pillow. She felt a hand on her chest, under her shirt. She tried to pull away but her limbs didn't want to work.

"Wha-what are you… st-stop…" she tried to protest. Justice laughed darkly.

"I'm sure that's not what you told the bastard you slept with," he commented snidely, "I just want to see for myself why Anders kept you around all this time."

"Wh-what?" Her mind was spinning so much. What was happening?

"You are going to pay for what you've done. You want to be a whore? I'll make you a whore," Justice growled. His eyes were almost white with anger, hard, and full of menace. Where was Anders? Why wasn't he stopping his friend?

"What!? N-no!" She could barely get the words out, much less deliver them with authority. She tried to think of something, anything that wasn't what was happening now. Her mind kept going to the compassionate man with kind blue eyes, Solas. She wished he were here now. He would never let her be hurt like this if he were. He may not want her any more than Anders did, but he was still a kind man. A kind man that wasn't here to stop Anders's best friend from delivering his 'justice'.

"This is your doing, your fault. No one hurts my friends and gets away with it." Justice growled violently in her ear. A tear slid down her cheek as everything went black.