Chapter Two
Emma wouldn't remember later how Regina's body got onto the shore, she wouldn't have any recollection of stepping off the boat or it sailing away on its own.
From what she understood, Snow had been the one to pull Henry to his feet so that David could scoop Regina up and place her on the grass before calling an ambulance.
Apparently, Henry didn't stop struggling against his grandmother until he was allowed to drop onto his mother's body and sob anew.
Emma was too numb for tears but she recognised the scene that she wished she was not part of.
Henry was currently consumed by what she had been when she registered that she'd run Hook through with Excalibur. He felt guilty and there was nothing that she could do about that right now.
How was she supposed to feel? Was there even a word to describe the emotion that came from watching Regina Mills die? For the fact that she had agreed to the deal that had caused all of this?
She had promised to never trade one life for another and she'd traded the most important one.
Blue lights shone through the treeline, the blaring siren, at last, covering Henry's cries and Emma hugged herself.
Snow stared at the sheriff as the paramedics arrived but Emma didn't move or blink.
Regina's eyes had been closed by David but the bile tracking through Emma's system made her feel like they were still staring into her, asking why she hadn't just told her the truth.
As Emma stayed put, it was Snow who kneeled beside Henry, refusing to look at the woman he was crying over for a long time.
"Henry, she needs to go," Snow said softly and the boy gripped her harder, his ear still pressed against her chest.
"No, they can't take her!" he cried, "They can't take my mom!"
This statement, at last, brought tears to the saviour's eyes but she couldn't hear whatever other soothing words her mother spewed as her field of vision was blocked and she finally registered that the pirate had been standing beside her the entire time.
He attempted to take her hand but she snatched it away as if he had seared her skin with his touch.
An hour ago, it would have brought her comfort but now she was focused on the alternative that had apparently always been available to her.
Hook scowled, how could he be offended under these circumstances?
"You can't seriously believe any of that, it was obviously a trick to make us doubt ourselves," he said and a wave of indignant rage crashed through Emma.
"Regina is…gone," Emma hissed, seeing her friend, maybe her best friend, being put onto a stretcher and the zipping of the body bag sliced at her heart hard. "How is that a trick?"
Killian shrugged and replied, "The Evil Queen isn't capable of True Love."
Emma clenched both of her fists unable to decide what degree of violence he deserved for that statement.
Henry decided for her, he seemed to appear from nowhere to deliver a hard punch to the pirate's cheek.
Emma had to throw her arm out in front of her son in case of retaliation.
"Henry!" Snow scolded.
"You don't get to talk about my mom ever again!" Henry shouted and Emma, at last, saw his face was bright crimson and drenched in tears.
How was it now her responsibility to make him feel better? To prepare him for a life without his mother when she had no idea how she was going to prevent herself from shattering?
Henry stormed off under her gaze and Emma swallowed hard.
She should stop him, right? He was running towards the treeline.
"Henry!" David called but he went unheeded.
"Swan," Hook said, almost as a whine, "You going to let that stand?"
"His mom just died, Hook, he can do whatever he wants," she said roughly, her face scrunching at her own words.
A hand slipped across her shoulder and she was about to push it off but fell into the touch upon seeing that it was her mother.
It may not be the touch that she wanted but it was a close second.
"Don't you think you should go and talk to him?" Snow said, ignoring Hook's scoff.
Was he always like this or was it just discovering that he wasn't his girlfriend's True Love that made him an insensitive jerk?
"I don't think he will want to talk to…me."
"I'll go," David offered and Emma gave him a grateful smile before staring over at the patch of grass that Regina was being wheeled away from.
Now that the bag was covering the mayor, Emma realised bitterly that Hook had robbed her of her last chance to glimpse her True Love, so she allowed her mother to hug her, trying not to stare too contemptuously at her boyfriend.
S
Henry ran until his lungs burned and he dropped against a tree, clutching his ribs and staring into the woods through blurred vision.
Objectively, the Underworld had been so much colder but right now he was shivering vigorously.
Unlike the Underworld, he knew that if he reached out, she would be there to take his hand. Now that Regina was officially a hero, her presence was so much more comforting. When she used her powers for good, he knew that he was safe.
What would his life look like now?
He'd clung onto her for long enough to recognise that the woman who had laughed at the last thing he'd said to her was no longer there.
No breath. No heartbeat.
Whatever was left of her was back in the Underworld, under Hades' power and the god seemed to have thought ahead enough to block all avenues back to her.
That all left little else to do than to cry as if it would achieve anything as if he wouldn't eventually be expected to return home and find a way to continue on with his life without the person who had known him best for the longest,
Like he wouldn't be riddled with guilt for the rest of his life until they met in the Underworld so that he could apologise for not insisting harder that they not get on that damn boat.
Regina would still be there by then, right? He could see her easily dealing with her unfinished business anytime soon.
Footsteps scrunched ahead of him and he buried his face into the scarf that she'd brought him. How many of his possessions had she provided him with? How long would it be until he would be able to look at a Marvel comic again and not think about their long discussions about superheroes?
As silly as it was, he had to wonder whether he would ever watch another MCU instalment without her. It was strange where one's mind went in the clutches of such intense grief.
It was so much different than with Neal even after he got his memories back. When it came to his father, he lamented what they never had a chance to have. Things had never really been peaceful in town for them to figure out their dynamic.
With the mother who had raised him, he knew exactly what he was missing out on.
She wouldn't teach him to drive, help him figure out which college to go to, and never try to convince him to try and attend an institution close to home.
When he pictured things like tying his tie for prom or graduation, helping him choose a major or reassuring him through every small and big decision, it wasn't Emma he saw.
Sure, there were plenty of things that he would need her for, but wasn't that the point of having more than one parent? Wasn't that why bringing Emma to Storybrooke was meant to end so well?
Hugging his knees closer as these thoughts renewed tears, Henry waited for his grandfather to sit beside him and speak:
"I thought that you would have gone further," Prince Charming said.
Henry pushed his nose further into his scarf and replied, "Mom hates it when I run away…hated it…"
David inclined his head and attempted to put his arm around his grandson but stopped as he tensed.
"Is this where you tell me that everything will be okay without my mom?" Henry sighed.
"No, I won't tell you that," David said, on the cusp of being offended by the suggestion, "What happened, it's…awful, I don't even know…"
"Do you even care about her?"
The offence became obvious on the prince this time but he seemingly willed it away as he recalled who he was talking to, his voice took on a softer tone, "How could you say that?"
"In my storybook…you're the one who pushed for her to be executed. She's only alive because grandma couldn't go through with it," Henry said, doing little not to sound accusatory.
That story had not bothered him until right now, not until he witnessed something approximating what Prince Charming would have done to the Evil Queen given the chance.
The indignation exuding from his grandfather did temper him slightly, however.
"And thank god that she couldn't," David replied, "Look at what she had given us, Henry. Storybrooke is far safer than the Enchanted Forest, she has actively protected us in ways that I'm sure not even she could have seen coming. She became friends with Snow White, became a mother, and a pretty good one, I'd wager?"
"The best," Henry sniffed, allowing his grandfather to put his arm around him this time.
"My point is, if I had known even a fraction of what she would do when she was given a real chance at redemption, I never, for a moment, would have considered taking the easy way out," David said.
"Even if you knew that she was in love with your daughter?" Henry countered but the man didn't cringe or tense at all.
"I like to think that I would have the sense to recognise how lucky Emma would have been," David sighed.
"Emma made her choice, she has Hook," Henry said bitterly and he wouldn't realise until later that the comparisons he was making between the value of the pirate and his mother's right to live were hardly fair.
"True Love goes both ways, Henry, Emma is probably just as devastated as you are," David assured and Henry was sure that he appeared unconvinced, "There is one thing I don't understand about all of this, though."
"What's that?" Henry asked.
"If Regina felt so deeply for Emma, why wouldn't she have warned her after Hades revealed his condition?"
Henry shrugged again, thinking of what he could have said to convince Regina to say something, or better yet he could have blurted it out before they walked away from Hades.
"It's exactly like Hades said…mom was sure that Emma would never choose her," Henry sighed.
David knit his eyebrows together, "So Regina knew that she was in love with Emma when she agreed to come to the Underworld to help save her boyfriend?"
"She told me that she wanted to see Emma smile again and she didn't care if she wasn't the one who got her to do it," Henry replied and picturing her making that statement, especially in comparison to the woman he had spent so long running away from, made his face crumble under the weight of his most powerful sobs yet. Falling against his grandfather, he lamented, "Why couldn't they just tell each other how they felt?"
David hugged him as he cried into his chest, shedding a tear or two of his own for the fallen queen as he replied, "I don't know."
S
Emma Swan had a clear image of what would happen once they got back to Storybrooke.
They would have one of their usual celebrations at Granny's to commemorate a quest well fought. The citizens of the town would toast their returning heroes and afterwards, Emma would go home with her boyfriend.
She was set to be happy, but that was no longer possible.
Her feelings for Regina ran deeply but had been present for so long now that she had learned to ignore them.
She conditioned herself to believe that it didn't hurt every time Regina talked about needing to find her happy ending. That family time was not painfully close to the dreams she had for a long time, but was still woefully out of reach of what she really wanted.
That every smile and casual touch didn't make her want to fall into a puddle of blush.
She had no reason to give into any of those feelings when she had a boyfriend who had been doing everything right.
It was hardly his fault that he wasn't a sexy former queen and the person who adopted and loved the son that she hadn't been able to at the time.
He wasn't the one who gave her some of her most precious (albeit fake) memories.
Did his last-minute sacrifice (after summoning the Dark Ones) match up to the strides that Regina had made for redemption?
The biggest issue that Emma kept circling back to in her multiple thought spirals was that she couldn't see herself being strong enough to help Regina bring her boyfriend to life if the roles were reversed.
If she felt any semblance of what she did as Hades suggested she did, how had she made that trip?
Her voice stating matter-of-factly 'you're too good for Hook' swiftly followed this thought and Emma craved to tell her past self to ask some follow-up questions during that conversation. If she'd pushed a little harder, maybe things would have been different?
She could be at 108 Milfin Street rather than sitting like a statue on her parents' couch staring out into the distance as her mother finished a phone call.
At last, Snow ended the call with a subdued 'I love you too' that very nearly had Emma wince.
That was how things were meant to be between True Loves and now apparently she would never get the chance to say those three words to her.
"Your father found Henry, he's taken him to Granny's to get something to eat," Snow said, tiredly flopping down onto the couch.
"You think that the kid has an appetite?" Emma mumbled.
"I doubt it," Snow sighed, "But at least he's not alone."
Emma nodded slowly in agreement until a thought struck her and her forehead creased as tears dropped down her cheeks.
"Like Regina?" Emma asked, her voice cracking.
Snow paused but began to reply, "Emma, she's…"
"Don't tell me she's fine, mom!" Emma exploded, "The literal lord of the Underworld just said that he's going to torture her!"
Snow put a hand on her daughter's knee, which did little for Emma's anxiety.
With them all back in Storybrooke, Regina presumably had Hades' undivided attention, was she suffering for what they had done while they were in the Underworld?
How many inhabitants of that horrid place would like to have their own shot at the Evil Queen?
"I was going to say that she's strong," Snow said.
"For the rest of time?!"
Snow blew out a breath, clearly hope speeches were not as forthcoming as usual, they'd already tried Hook's blood before finally leaving. It only confirmed what Hades said about their chances of returning.
Besides, hadn't it already been too long to share a heart even though they found a way to reverse the spell he'd put on her heart.
From Emma's perspective, they were completely out of options, at least if her helplessness was anything to go by.
"We'll find a way to…we did it once, we just need to find another way. I'll speak to Belle tomorrow and…"
"And in the meantime?" Emma cut her off, "Regina is going to be in agony and she thinks that I would choose…How could she have never told me?! We spent so much time together, she had so many opportunities!"
"You have a boyfriend, sweetheart," Snow sighed.
Emma could only shrug, preferring not to dwell too hard on the whinging pirate who had been under the impression that she would be going home with him.
Even if Hades hadn't revealed that Regina was her True Love, she had to wonder whether Killian was capable of recognising how fundamentally her life had just changed.
Her son's co-parent and her closest friend were just gone.
How was the boyfriend that she had risked everything for not more understanding of that? Was he still pissed about the Dark One situation?
Frankly, Emma didn't care if he was, hadn't she and her family more than made up for it by now?
"So what Hades said was true? You love Regina?" Snow asked and Emma checked for signs of judgement which were not there. Once she determined this, she shrugged and Snow added, "Since when?"
"Since…Neverland, I guess," Emma muttered.
"Emma, I don't understand," Snow said softly, still squeezing her leg in a reassuring way, "Why didn't you tell her how you feel?"
Emma rubbed at her temple, willing her headache to go away.
She didn't enjoy discussing emotions at the best of times but it wasn't as if Hades had given her much choice.
If she remained silent, it would be long until she found herself sitting next to Dr Hopper instead of her mother.
Now that she was sure that Snow had no issues with her attraction, what harm could honesty do?
"You say that like it should have been easy!" Emma snapped, "It took us so long to even be friends, to figure out how to co-parent Henry, how could I ruin all of that? How could she have felt the same way and not fucking told me?!"
"Have you considered that she had the same worries? Like what Hades said…"
"That bullshit about her not being good enough for me?" Emma scoffed, "There is no way that she could think…"
"Regina…she never had the highest opinion of herself, Emma," Snow admitted, almost lamenting.
"How can that be true she's…" Emma trailed off, the mayor's grinning face appearing in her mind, maybe after a particularly strong hug from their son and she added, reverently, "She's everything."
"But…Hook?" Snow asked.
Emma ran her tongue over her cracked lips, surprised to find the explanation ready to go. Perhaps it had always been available to her even if she would have never said it out loud before today?
"He kept pursuing me, literally through time. Eventually, I had to figure out that the guy who said he wanted to be with me was a more likely future than the woman who was busy trying to find an Author to get her happy ending. I really do love Killian but…"
"You believe Hades when he said that he wasn't your True Love?"
"I would have…before…" Emma admitted, "But when Killian died, I felt so guilty. I was preoccupied with everything that I did wrong and I know that I couldn't let him suffer because of me. But Regina…her being…gone, it feels so wrong. It feels like a part of me is physically missing. Does that make any sense?"
"You know that I understand that," Snow said sympathetically, "I'm so sorry that you're feeling that way, sweetheart. I wish that there was a way to make it better."
"I know this must be confusing for you, mom," Emma sighed, sinking into the couch while trying to decide whether she would ever be capable of sleeping peacefully again. Was it even worth trying at this point? "You guys had such a complicated history…"
"I'm not confused at all, Emma," Snow replied, "I'm sad, my friend just died."
Emma deflated and fell sideways to drop her head onto her mother's lap where a comforting hand came to her hair as tears silently tracked down her face.
As she cried, she found herself immeasurably grateful that Snow wasn't muttering that everything would somehow be okay.
She probably knew that it wouldn't help in the slightest, which was likely why she wasn't saying anything at all.
"I don't think I can face Hook," Emma admitted as she turned towards her mother's stomach.
"You can stay here as long as you need, you know that."
"I know," Emma sighed.