Mafuyu's POV
I don't think I've cried this much in years. My whole body is risking to give out while I lean against Kanade, my head hurts and whirls while while my stomach threatens to dump its contents all over her. I am terrified and cold but the more and more I let Kanade speak to me in a soft, soothing way, the warmer my chest feels. The only thing on my mind is my mother but as Kanade guides me into a warm dark environment I begin to think about how physically cold and wet I am. Kanade takes out my ponytail and begins to mess around with my hair, which is something I find oddly calming, she gently brushes out my soaking hair with her fingers and then reties my hair back into a ponytail using a dry hair tie. As she does this I nuzzle my head into the crook of her neck and cry. I want to tell Kanade everything, the entire conversation between my mother and me, but I can't. I can't even explain to her what happened with my phone, even after she asks. I want to tell her how sick I feel for leaving my mother and coming out here in the rain, but again, I can't.
I think Kanade senses I'm nauseous, she drags a small garbage can and rests it near my reach. I begin to cry again. My whole body is having mixed emotions. My chest and head feel hot and cold at the same time which makes the vomit in my throat resurface. I then grab the can and vomit into it. Kanade places my hair on my back while I shake and cry, trying to comprehend all that has happened to me in the last hour. Consistently I go through waves of nausea and vomiting over the next twenty minutes and Kanade is there with me for all of it. Once I am stable enough to sit up she pulls a soft green blanket over me, which I quickly sink into. Kanade then stands up and begins to walk to her room, saying something to me that I don't quite hear. I just don't want her to leave me alone right now. I start to cry again, I don't understand why I keep breaking into sobs. Kanade swiftly comes back with her phone and grabs my hand with her free one, once again speaking to me in comforting gibberish words that I can't understand. The only thing I do get from her is that Mizuki and Ena know I am safe now. I then lean my head against Kanade and close my eyes, begging for peace, even if only in her arms.
It must have been a while as I seemed to have blacked out because the first thing I notice is that I was in Kanade's bed next to a trash bin filled with vomit. I am dizzy and can only hear the faint voices of my friends in a fuzzy background.
"When I brought her to my room she was so out of it: I kept having to change the trash because she couldn't stop vomiting, I was getting so worried. She wouldn't even let me leave the room, was so afraid I'd abandon her. It was odd seeing her with such intense emotion but I did the best I could for her," It was Kanade, meaning I could hear properly again. A small bit of me wanted to rush to her comfort but I didn't, maybe I couldn't. She noticed I was awake and turned to me with gentleness, swerving her chair next to her bed as she smiled at me.
"How are you feeling Mafuyu?" she asked. My nausea returned with a vengeance as I remembered what I have done to my mother. Really, I wanted to explain everything to Mother…but she wouldn't let me.
I sit up in the bed I lie in and wipe the tears from my eyes, "better than a while ago," I respond, Kanade nods and smiles at me again. Suddenly Kanade's face flushes while she nervously laughs, looking me up and down. "Sorry about your clothes, I gave you one of my mother's old sweaters but I'm not sure if you remember putting it on," she giggles. She's right, I don't remember anything past closing my eyes against her. Even with my emotions so high Kanade still made me feel so warm, the moment gave me a bit of clarity; a realization of how much I cared for Kanade's well-being, and in the span of me sitting there in silence, I felt extremely bad for using her in such a way.
"Kanade. I'm sorry for causing you so much trouble," my voice is low, almost a breathy whisper. Kanade grabs my hand and I feel that warmth rush through me. "It wasn't a problem Mafuyu," she states as I again fall against her.
"Hey, are you two alright?" I hear Ena's voice through Kanade's monitor and I feel more at ease knowing Ena and Mizuki are there. "Yeah. We're ok.." Kanade responds for both of us. H
"Mafuyu. Please tell us as much as you can when you're ready. We want to help you but take your time, ok?" that was Mizuki. I nod and feel Kanade's arm shift, assumingly giving Mizuki a symbol that I comply with their request.
I think that it has been hours since I woke up but I haven't moved. I feel as if I blacked out again but I can hear the other Nightcord member's voices so I know I'm not. I have yet to explain everything to the three of them. I want to but I hope they understand that I just can't right now.
Maybe in a few days…will I even still be here in a few days? I push the thoughts of my mother out of my head because every time I think of her, or see her face in my thoughts, I feel guilty. Like I've betrayed her, and I feel as if I have, leaving her so sad when maybe she just wants the best for me.
Right?
A/N OH LORD How it has been YEARS since I've posted on here :0 little short Mafu-centric, kinda old but I love this story