Yeah, so All You Need Is One will be my last Finchel story, but it's not done yet. So I think you'll forgive me adding a third and final part to what I'm calling the Sergeant McFancy Pants series. This is partially inspired by the fact that I just graduated with my own master's degree, but also because I thought it would be fun to bring Kurt and his party-planning abilities outside of NYC.
So I've decided that McKinley College is a fictional school created for the purposes of this story—although this time, McKinley College is located in Philadelphia. I've modeled the program experienced by the middle Hudson child after my own graduate school experience (which was at a real, accredited program).
This is also a love letter of sorts to Philly, because it's my city. I started this before the Phillies lost in the first round of the playoffs which yes, I'm still mad about. But I still love them. It's my cross to bear as Philadelphia sports fan lol.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. This story title comes from the song "Home" by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros.
one.
Harper Hudson stared at her phone, frowning at the selfie her Uncle Kurt had sent her. In the picture, he was grinning brightly, while he was holding a giant green binder up next to his face that read, "Harper's Graduation Weekend." She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger as she prayed for patience. She had a whole twenty-four hours before her entire family descended upon the city of Philadelphia. She felt bad for everyone in this city, honestly. The City of Brotherly Love had nothing on her Uncle Kurt.
"What?" One of her best friends from her graduate program, Sloan, asked. They were sharing a hotel room in the city while they attended the final seminars needed to complete their degrees. "You have that look on your face."
"What look?" Harper asked. Sure, their graduate program had taken place primarily online, so most of her interactions with her classmates had taken place over Zoom, Facetime, and email. Still, she had gotten to know a small group of her cohort very well, and they'd helped each other through their program on their way to becoming speech language pathologists.
Sloan wiggled a finger at her. "You know, that look where you're about to blow a gasket. I've seen it on just about every group project we've ever been assigned."
Harper huffed out a harsh breath, fluttering the bangs she had spent a good ten minutes arranging on her forehead. She was thirty years old, and she still didn't understand why their graduate program had insisted upon so many damn group projects. Group projects were hard enough to complete when you attended the same program in-person; it was doubly as hard when all of the students were in different locations for an online program!
"My uncle has this… thing," Harper said slowly. "He's great," she quickly added. "He's awesome, and there's so many things I can go to him about when I have a problem. Hell, he's the chief editor for Vogue."
"Oh my god, that's why all of your clothes are amazing!" Sloan exclaimed.
Harper bit her lip and waved her hand. She had quite a few people in her family who had high-profile jobs, and she didn't like to talk about it too much. It was a little easier back home in New York City, where every other person you met was famous or knew someone famous, or who was famous-adjacent.
"Not all of my clothes are from him, I promise," Harper assured her friend. "But anyway. He has this… thing, with planning parties. As in he gets really intense about it."
"Intense how?"
"He's been notorious in my whole family with party planning since before my parents got married. And they've been married for almost thirty-five years," Harper said bluntly. She looked at her where her phone was buzzing and pushed it away from her with a fingertip, as if that could somehow quiet it. "He's taken it upon himself to plan a whole graduation weekend for me, this time."
"That's… nice?" Sloan tried. So that explained the beautiful, gold-embossed invitation she had received to Harper's graduation party two months ago. The party was supposed to be taking place in Philadelphia, and Sloan was seventy-five percent sure that her friend knew nothing about it.
"It is nice," Harper was quick to say. She loved that her whole family was so excited for her to graduate with her master's degree, and she certainly wasn't ungrateful about the fact that they all wanted to be there with her. After graduating with her bachelor's degree, it had taken her some time to figure out what she wanted to do with her life. She had worked hard over the past three years to get this degree, and she wanted to celebrate it.
"It's just… We have this name that we gave my uncle when he gets into moods like this. I'm just trying to mentally prepare myself for the next four days."
"What's the name?"
Despite the stress Harper felt, she grinned broadly. The nickname they had bestowed upon Uncle Kurt never failed to amuse her. "Sergeant McFancy Pants."
two.
"I can't believe my baby is getting a master's degree!"
Finn smiled patiently as he folded a pair of trouser pants into his suitcase. He'd heard it plenty of times over the thirty-something years he'd been married to Rachel Berry: "I can't believe my baby is going to elementary/middle/high school!" or "I can't believe my baby got their first job at a store/coffee shop/café/pet clinic!" or "I can't believe my baby got accepted to college!" or "I can't believe my baby is going to play on a major league baseball team!" And perhaps Finn's favorite so far: "I can't believe my baby is going to have a baby!"
They had four children: two boys, and two girls. Following Jack, Harper had been born three years later. Two years after was Caroline, followed by Michael four years later. Their life was good; Finn's garage was still doing very well, and Rachel had moved on to opening her own recording studio, geared specifically towards Broadway performers that wanted to make the jump into mainstream music and film. Gold Star Studios had produced some serious talent over the last twenty years, and Finn could not have been prouder of her.
Their kids had done well, too. Jack had played just about every sport under the sun before he finally settled on baseball. When he had been recruited into the MLB right out of college, Finn and Rachel had been thrilled. Rachel had attacked learning the rules of baseball with the same single-minded focus she had used when learning about football when she had started dating Finn all those years ago. Jack had been playing for the Philadelphia Phillies for the past five years. As a New York man through and through, Finn had never imagined having any other jersey in his closet. Yet, the red and white Hudson jersey was his absolute favorite.
Caroline worked in sports marketing, and now had a job running the social media department for the New York Rangers. Finn was glad that at least one of his children was working for a New York sports team, so he could continue to support them without feeling guilty. Mikey was currently entering his third year of veterinary school. He had known since middle school that he wanted to work with animals, and was the main drive behind every single animal the Hudson family had acquired over the years.
Harper had been the one who hadn't quite known what she wanted to do with her life. Which was fine, of course. It took some time for people to figure things out, sometimes. After getting her undergraduate degree, Harper had bounced from job to job for a while, excelling at everything she tried, but not really finding anything that truly made her happy. It wasn't until Quinn, who was a nurse practitioner, had talked to Harper about being a speech language pathologist that she found her course in life.
McKinley College, a private college in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, offered a part-time, online program. Purely because her older brother played for the Phillies, Harper decided to apply there. She had been thrilled when she was accepted, and she nannied part-time to make ends meet while she was in the program.
Now, she was finally graduating. The entire family had decided to go to Philadelphia to attend Harper's graduate hooding ceremony, and of course, Kurt had taken over immediately. He had quite the weekend planned for them, which culminated in an extravagant graduation party at Fairmount Water Works, right off of Boat House Row.
Finn was just grateful that Philadelphia was close enough to New York City that it didn't require a plane ride. He'd been on a plane with Kurt multiple times (the near-disastrous family trip to Disney World four years ago came to mind) and it was an experience that he didn't care to repeat. Finn was pretty sure that Kurt had been in danger of getting arrested by an air marshal on that trip to Florida, and he wasn't about to be put on a no-fly list because his brother was a pain in the ass.
"Don't look at me like that," Rachel ordered as she slipped a pair of Louboutin's—the pair that Kurt had given her thirty-five years ago, when she had been practicing walking in heels to get ready for her wedding to Finn—into a silk bag to prepare them for travel. "This is a momentous occasion!"
"I can't believe you still have those shoes," Finn said by way of an answer. Look, Kurt had been his brother for forty-five years, at this point. He knew about good shoes, and he knew what good quality looked like. Still, he couldn't quite believe that his wife had managed to hang on to the same pair of shoes for over thirty years.
Rachel patted the silk bag fondly. Kurt might have been a pain in the ass—and still was—but these were beautiful pumps, and she treasured them. She only wore them during special occasions, and the graduate hooding ceremony of her oldest daughter definitely counted as one.
"Are you sure those are a part of your Kurt-approved outfits for the trip?" Finn quipped.
That made Rachel roll her eyes. Kurt had sent them all a pre-approved packing list of items they needed. For Rachel, Santana, and Quinn specifically, Kurt had actually gone through their closets and had picked dresses specifically for them to bring on this trip. Santana had already called them three times and declared that Finn and Rachel Hudson were responsible for the increase in the amount of money she spent on alcohol.
"Your brother can kiss my ass," Rachel said, with all of the affection of someone who had been friends for over forty years can give. "But I love him, though."
"Yeah, yeah." Finn glanced down at his phone, then, his brow furrowing in concern. "You know, we haven't heard anything from Harper about potential party planning. Should… should we be worried?"
Rachel zipped one of the Kurt-approved dresses into a garment bag. While he was a giant pain in the ass, she did have to admit that he had excellent taste, and access to some truly amazing clothing. "You saw that itinerary Kurt sent out, right? I'm sure he sent the same thing to Harper. If she had a problem with it, she would have told us."
Harper certainly wasn't one to keep her opinions to herself, that was true. Still, Finn knew that she would be busy with finishing up her final assignments for the program, so she couldn't be too concerned with entertaining her family. Plus, this weekend was supposed to be about her, so she shouldn't have to be worried about what Sergeant McFancy Pants was doing.
Which brought Finn to his current idea: "You have your Sergeant McFancy Pants Brigade shirt, don't you?"
"Of course I do." Rachel plucked the pink shirt out of the neatly folded pile by her suitcase and waved it above her head. She bit her lip, then. "Are you sure Harper won't mind? This is her weekend, after all, I don't want to embarrass her… well, too much, anyway." As her mother, it was her job to embarrass her at least a little bit.
Finn snorted. "Are you kidding me? These t-shirts were her idea. You know our kid loves a theme." It was true, Harper did love a theme. It was also true that the Sergeant McFancy Pants Brigade t-shirts had been her idea, but it had also been a flippant remark she had made two weeks before she left for Philadelphia. It had been Finn who had taken the idea and run with it.
"So you sent her the t-shirt, then?" Rachel asked in amusement. Santana had quite the skill with the Cricut, and had been the one to make the shirts and pass them out/send them to the appropriate people. She had threatened Blaine and his children with Kurt to within an inch of their lives if they told him about the shirts before they could be revealed; they had taken the threats seriously.
"Um, Santana personally packed the shirt in her bag before she left," Finn corrected. "She said that way, no one would forget it." Finn and Harper were notorious for forgetting at least one important thing when traveling. Rachel had lost count of all of the times they had to run out to a Target or Walmart on various vacations to pick up socks or hair supplies or toothbrushes.
"We're going to have to pick a day to wear them where we won't be on McKinley's campus," Rachel mused. She was all for embarrassing her favorite brother-in-law, but she wasn't about to bestow the same humiliation upon her own daughter. There would be some strategic planning that needed to happen to get everyone to wear the shirts at the same time.
"We'll figure it out," Finn was quick to assure his wife. He certainly wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to embarrass his brother—no matter how old they got, that urge never quite went away. "Hey, Jack told me that he and Morgan made sure their nanny was available to watch the kids while we were in Philadelphia. So they'll be out late with us, as long as Jack doesn't have a game."
Their group knew how to party. And with every kid the core group had added, they had just learned how to parent around the partying. Responsibly, of course. For the most part. But that was part of the reason why they were still so close. So that the others could pick up the slack when they needed to. Their family tree was pretty extensive at this point, and they loved it. The closeness of their group was now extending to their own kids and their children, and it was a wonderful thing to witness.
Rachel reached over to ruffle her husband's graying hair. She told him often, but she loved the fact that his hair was more salt and pepper than brown, nowadays. "The city of brotherly love. It's sort of a fitting city for you and Kurt to be in, isn't it?"
Finn snorted as he zipped his suitcase shut. There was plenty of extra space in it now, but he was sure by the time they left tomorrow morning, it would be packed with extra things Rachel had deemed "absolutely necessary." Still, he couldn't help but grin affectionately at his wife as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and drew her into his side.
"I think it's kind of like an omen, more than anything else," he quipped. "But sure, babe."
three.
Harper took a desperate glug from the pumpkin spice latte she was holding as she paced back and forth in a small three-foot square. Somehow, through some serious organizational skills and sheer force of will on the part of Kurt and Quinn, her entire family had ended up basically caravanning their cars from New York down to Philadelphia. They were all staying the hotel that Harper herself was staying in—god help the poor staff.
The lobby of the hotel was bustling as she waited for the rest of her family. With every turn of her feet, she would anxiously check her Apple watch to make sure that one of her many family members hadn't texted her. Her phone had been going off since six o'clock in the morning, and it was safe to say that she had been close to chucking it across the room more than once.
"Whoa. What did your watch ever do to you?"
Harper choked on the mouthful of pumpkin spice latte she had been in the middle of swallowing. She clamped her jaw shut, one hand on her chest as she tried desperately not to cough and splutter the latte all over the man standing in front of her.
Wyatt Logan, her older brother's teammate and the starting catcher of the Philadelphia Phillies.
Harper could feel her cheeks flood with heat, and not for the first time in her life, she cursed the fact that she had her father's pale coloring. Against her brunette hair, it was obvious that she was blushing, and she prayed that Wyatt wouldn't mention it.
Jack and Wyatt had been traded to the Phillies in the same year, and had quickly become close friends. Over the years, and especially since she had been visiting Philadelphia more after starting graduate school, Harper had met Wyatt a few times. He was almost unfairly good looking: tall, broad shouldered, dark, messy hair, and hazel eyes that would sometimes shift to gold depending on how the light hit them. He also happened to be ridiculously good at baseball, and had made a name for himself as one of the best catchers in the game.
Needless to say, Harper had a giant crush on him.
It was sort of embarrassing to admit to herself that she had a crush as a thirty year old woman, but she didn't know what else to call it. Wyatt was always kind to her, teasing her in that gentle way that boys did when their friends had younger siblings. If Jack wasn't able to check on her whenever she went to one of the games, Wyatt always made sure that he was there, just in case she needed something.
Caroline always told her that her crush was obvious. Harper frequently told her sister to shut up.
Wyatt put a hand on her shoulder as she coughed and spluttered, which she was sure was just so attractive. Paired with her leggings and oversized McKinley College sweatshirt, along with her hair knotted on top of her head, Harper was suddenly feeling quite self-conscious about her appearance.
"Whoa, are you okay?" he asked, his brow creased in concern. He patted her back a few times, more in an effort to sooth than actually clear anything. Whacking her hard on the back wouldn't offer her much help in the moment.
Finally managing to successfully swallow her mouthful of latte, Harper cleared her throat. "What are you doing here?" she spluttered.
Knowing that she was okay after hearing her speak, Wyatt's eyebrows shot up. "Morgan is still finishing up at work and Jack got stuck in traffic picking up the kids, so he asked me to come and provide you with some backup for when your family got here."
"Oh." That was probably somewhere in the forty or so text messages she had received over the past hour. "I, uh… that's really nice of you."
Smiling now, Wyatt swept an overly dramatic bow. "I'm happy to be of service, madame."
A smile broke out on Harper's face now, even as she tried to fight against it. She rolled her eyes at his little display and opened her mouth—to tease him, probably, but she wasn't entirely sure what she was going to say, honestly. She was cut off by an excited shout of her name, and her cheeks flushed red again.
"Harper Anne Hudson!"
Wyatt wasn't even bothering to hide his laughter as she lifted her latte to her lips again and finished it in three large gulps. She unceremoniously shoved the empty cup at Wyatt as she turned around, coming face-to-face with her entire family at once. She paused, shocked that they were all there at the exact same time—she wasn't quite sure how they had managed that—but then a genuine smile formed on her face, and she rushed forward to hug her parents first.
It took almost ten minutes for the greetings to be exchanged, and everyone insisted on talking over one another. It was a scene of general chaos right there in the hotel lobby, and Quinn and Santana finally pulled one person from each family to check in to the various hotel suites. The whole time, Rachel kept looking at her oldest daughter with big, wide eyes, blinking rapidly to hold back tears.
"Aw, come on, Mom." Harper groaned and rolled her eyes towards the sky, praying for patience. "Please, please hold the tears in. You're not allowed to cry until the ceremony." It was something they had all agreed on before she had left for Philly. Otherwise, Rachel would be blubbering the whole weekend.
Rachel sniffled loudly. "I can't help it!" she exclaimed as she hugged Harper again. "And I'm not making any promises."
Caroline rolled her eyes as she shoved her way forward and looped an arm around her older sister's shoulders. "Mom, I love you, but you gotta get a grip. Poor Harper has to focus on finishing up her labs and graduating."
"And all of the events I have planned!"
"What?"
All three Hudson women made the exclamation at the same time and whipped towards Kurt, who had suddenly appeared in front of them. They were all wearing identical expressions that Kurt had seen on Rachel's face for a long, long time now. He was quite adept at letting it roll off of his back, and he just smiled winningly at them.
Harper sighed heavily and looked towards Wyatt again, snatching the empty coffee cup out of his grasp. She lifted it to her lips and tilted her head back, desperate to get any last dregs of the latte that remained. Once again, Wyatt was openly laughing at her.
"Um, you know it's empty, right?" Wyatt supplied helpfully.
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Yeah, thanks, I got that," she retorted snippily.
Next to her, Caroline let out a low whistle and squeezed her sister around the shoulders again. "Be nice to the hot baseball player, Harps," she whispered not-so-quietly into her ear.
Harper closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. It was going to be a long weekend.
four.
"Alright, let me see this itinerary."
Harper was up in Kurt and Blaine's suite with her parents, Caroline, Quinn, Santana, and Wyatt (who was still hanging around for some reason that Harper hadn't quite figured out). Michael had disappeared—likely to the bar in the hotel lobby—but Jack was only about fifteen minutes away.
Harper was sprawled out in the middle of the floor in the sitting room of the suite, since Caroline had decided to take up most of the space on the couch. Wyatt was sitting in an armchair situated by Harper's shoulder, and she was incredibly aware of how his ankle kept brushing against her. Everyone else was scattered around the room—situated in the kitchenette, perched on the coffee table, chatting by the door.
"Wait, you didn't give her a copy of the schedule yet? Kurt!" Rachel huffed and poked her brother-in-law in the shoulder. "You promised me you'd give it to her before we left!"
Kurt batted her hand away. "I promised I would get it to her before the hooding ceremony," he corrected unapologetically. With a flourish, he presented the itinerary—printed on Kelly green cardstock and laminated—to his niece with a flourish.
Harper stared at the paper for a long moment. "It's in my school colors," she finally said.
"Of course it is." Kurt sounded half-way offended that she thought he would do any different. "It's the whole theme for the weekend! McKinley College and your hooding ceremony!"
"I… okay." Harper held the paper in front of her face and scanned the color-coded, meticulously planned itinerary. "We're supposed to have dinner reservations in two hours?"
"Correct," Kurt confirmed. "And speaking of… are you going to wear that?"
Harper sighed and sat up, while Rachel let out an indignant sound on behalf of her daughter. Finn rolled his eyes and nudged Kurt pointedly in the side. "Dude. Really?" Harper had other things to worry about besides whatever dress code Kurt had decided to enact on the weekend.
Kurt steadfastly ignored his older brother and sister-in-law. "You did follow my guidelines in the packing list I gave you, didn't you?"
Harper let out another gusty sigh, ruffling the side bangs she had hastily pushed aside. She leaned back, half against the leg of the chair Wyatt was sitting in, and half against his left leg. She froze when she felt the warmth of his leg through the denim of jeans—she hadn't even realized what she was doing until she was already settled against him. She couldn't resist peeking up at him, and was pleasantly surprised to find that he was wearing a small smile. She suddenly realized that she had a question to answer, and that she was sitting in a room surrounded by just about her entire family.
Flushing, and totally giving herself away, Harper cleared her throat. "Yes, I followed the packing list exactly, Uncle Kurt."
He wrinkled his nose as he cast a look at her leggings and oversized sweatshirt. "I don't remember that being among the approved items."
"Uncle Kurt, get in the school spirit!" Caroline exclaimed, coming to Harper's defense. They were all aware that Kurt was being a little more… spirited in his regular party-planning insanity than usual, since he had taken his skills out of state this time. Still, this weekend was all about celebrating Harper and all the hard work she had done, and no one was afraid to remind Kurt about it.
Harper shot her sister a thankful look but quickly said, "I'll go back to my room and change, I promise. I'm assuming tonight is for the green dress?"
"Absolutely not! You need to wear the blue dress tonight, Harper!"
"Oh, right." Harper rolled her eyes, doing a perfect imitation of her father. "How could I ever make such a mistake?" Despite the general insanity that came with being around all of her family at once, Harper was slowly beginning to find amusement in the situation. She felt Wyatt briefly squeeze her shoulder, and she knew that her cheeks flared bright red again.
Looking up, she caught Santana and Quinn's eye, where they were both giving her knowing smiles. She bit her lip and was relieved when there was a knock on the door to the suite. Finn opened it, revealing Jack, his wife Morgan, and their two young daughters, Sydney and Delilah.
"Thank god," Harper murmured under her breath as her head dropped back, resting against the side of Wyatt's thigh. Having her older brother and his kids there was a surefire way to provide a distraction for a prolonged amount of time.
Finn, Rachel, Kurt, and Blaine monopolized the attention of the kids while Jack and Morgan made their way further into the hotel suite, stopping to hug Quinn and Santana. Morgan's eyes fell on Harper and Wyatt, and her eyebrows shot up as a smile spread across her lips. Jack hadn't noticed yet, since he was too busy sitting on top of Caroline, trying to get her to give up some space on the couch.
"Poor Harper is sitting on the floor because you're hogging the whole freaking thing—hey." Jack's eyes fell on his little sister and teammate, and the arrangement they were currently sitting in. "Why are you two sitting so close together?"
"You saw them right?"
"Oh, San, I think we all saw them."
"Rachel, you're about to have a professional baseball player as a son-in-law. That's two highly paid sports players in your family. What did you sacrifice to get that?"
"They're not even dating yet, Santana." Still, Rachel couldn't keep the smile off of her face. Everyone had seen the way that Wyatt and Harper had interacted, and they were all talking about it. Rachel had resolved to make sure that everyone didn't make too big a deal out of it. Harper's boyfriends had been few and far between, so getting to watch a new relationship develop right before their eyes was exciting.
"Look, I don't think you're that openly affectionate with someone if you're not planning on dating them," Santana pointed out pragmatically. Santana and her wife, Brittany, didn't have any kids. As such, Santana viewed her closest friends' children as her own and looked out for them diligently. Finn and Puck often complained that Santana was much nicer to their children than she ever was to them.
"Did you see how he would do it when he noticed her getting stressed?" Quinn gushed. "And she leaned in to him every time!" Quinn had three sons of her own, and while she loved them with all her heart, she also loved that she'd be able to be a part of more girly-type things with her nieces.
"Oh, are you talking about Harper and Wyatt?" Kurt asked as he bustled into Finn and Rachel's suite. Theirs was down the hall from Kurt and Blaine's, which Finn had requested very specifically. He had also very specifically requested that Quinn and Puck be put in the suite between them, and he wasn't one bit sorry about it.
Rachel stared, open-mouthed, at Kurt for a long moment before she looked back towards Quinn and Santana. "Didn't I close the door all the way? I didn't leave it propped open, correct?"
Santana and Quinn exchanged a look. Over the past few weeks, as they had been leading up to this trip, Kurt and gotten more and more intense. After all of their years together, they were used to the buildup, but in the moment, it was easy to get caught up. As always, Rachel and Kurt had a special way of pushing each other's buttons.
Then Santana grinned wickedly. "You definitely closed the door," she supplied helpfully while Quinn groaned and covered her face with her hand.
"Kurt Hummel-Anderson, how did you get into my room—"
"I have a key. Obviously." He waved the little rectangle of plastic over his head and the bustled into Finn and Rachel's room. "You know what you're supposed to be wearing tonight, right? I'm going to steam it for you. God knows I can't trust you and Finn to do it on your own."
The comment itself was vaguely insulting, as Rachel and Finn had been more than capable of steaming their own clothes since college, at least. However, Rachel was still stuck on one particular detail. "What do you mean, you have a key to my room?" Her voice got more and more shrill with each word.
As usual, Kurt was completely unfazed by Rachel's rising frustration. "Of course I have a key to your room. I need to make sure that you're staying on schedule."
"I'm going to take your schedule and shove it right up your—"
"Kurt!" Apparently, Kurt had left the door to the suite propped open, allowing Blaine to come in. He was wearing a look of half-exasperation and half-affection—the facial expression he wore about seventy percent of the time around his husband. "Would you please let everyone get some rest? We've spent all day traveling."
Kurt rolled his eyes, rather dramatically. "Please, the car ride was barely two hours."
"Two hours without traffic," Blaine pointed out reasonably. "And that doesn't include the time that we factored in because we had to stop twice." Blaine's voice got a little pointed here. All in all, the trip had taken almost three hours. That actually wasn't too bad, given the shenanigans they tended to get in when they all traveled together.
Quinn, who was the reason for both of those stops, refused to apologize for them. "It's not my fault I have a small bladder. Blame my sons. And I didn't hear anyone complaining when we got to stop for coffee and snacks twice as a result."
This argument was decades old, and there was never a winner. Rachel quickly changed the topic. "Kurt, just leave so I can get changed, since you seem so concerned with sticking to the schedule."
"I'm less concerned with the schedule than I am with making sure everyone wears the appropriate outfits at the right time," Kurt said as he pulled Rachel's dress for the night from where it was hanging in the closet. He whipped a travel-sized steamer out from seemingly nowhere, battery-operated and already filled with water. It began sputtering with steam almost the instant Kurt turned it on. "I need to make sure everyone looks good."
The three women exchanged long-suffering looks, and then directed pointed looks towards Kurt's husband. Blaine held his hands out in supplication and shrugged his shoulders. He had long ago stopped apologizing for Kurt's sometimes crazy actions. He knew when to pick his battles, anyway.
"Why?" Quinn, Santana, and Rachel asked unanimously, in tired voices.
"Because I hired a professional photographer for the whole weekend, of course."
five.
Harper's phone was buzzing repeatedly on the nightstand. She was almost afraid to look at it, honestly. Kurt had already been by her room (having knocked, thankfully), and had steamed the dress she was supposed to wear that night. Sloan was watching all of this with amusement, kind of wishing that she was going to go on this dinner. It was sure to be an interesting time.
"I love my family," Harper said out loud, more to herself than to her friend. When they were driving her especially crazy, it was sometimes nice to audibly remind herself of that fact.
"You know that you're uncle is going to throw a giant graduation party at the end of this weekend, right?" Sloan finally said as she zipped up her suitcase. Now that they were closer to the hooding ceremony, Sloan was switching rooms to stay with her fiancé, who was flying in later that night. Caroline would be staying in the room with Harper, because, as she put it, "I'm going to need a break from our lovely family."
Harper sighed gustily as she flopped back on her bed. She was risking wrinkling the dress, but she couldn't find it within herself to care at the moment. "Yeah, Jack gave me a heads up when he got the invitation. My uncle isn't always as sneaky as he likes to think he is."
Right on cue, there was a loud bang on their door. "Harper! You have ten minutes to get down to the lobby!"
Sloan jumped about a foot in the air, holding both hands to her chest. "Holy crap! How does he do that?"
Harper was staring at the ceiling. "Look, I have no actual proof, but I swear he has every location we've ever been in bugged. And I think he's put trackers on us. He always seems to know where we are."
Sloan couldn't help but laugh. "They should make a TV show about your family."
"Well hello to you too, Michael." Harper covered the book her younger brought had been reading with her hand as she slid onto the stool next to him.
Michael glanced up at her, took a sip of his scotch, and then returned his attention back to his book. "I said hi to you when we all got here, didn't I?"
"Yeah, and then you left us!" Caroline appeared on Michael's other side, and she swiped the scotch from him. She downed it all in one gulp, made a face, and then coughed. Michael sighed and rolled his eyes.
"That's a sipping scotch, you know," he said dryly.
Caroline wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "Whatever, you're only twenty-four. What do you know about good alcohol?"
"Clearly more than you do."
Harper caught the eye of the bartender as she pressed her fingers to her temples. "Can I have a dirty martini, please?"
"You're ordering?" Jack and Morgan appeared on Harper's other side. Wyatt was close behind them. "Aren't we supposed to be leaving in three minutes, or something?"
"That's an oddly specific amount of time," Morgan commented. She held up two fingers, indicating that she wanted the same order as Harper. Hey, her in-laws had the kids for the night, and she planned on taking full advantage of it.
Jack shot his wife a look. "You know how Uncle Kurt is. I'm just going off of what I saw on that freaking schedule he sent us."
"Yeah, and you know that with this group, we're always running at least fifteen minutes late. Uncle Kurt puts everything on Hudson time for a reason." Harper accepted her martini with a smile of thanks and told the bartender to charge both hers and Morgan's drink to her room.
Everyone knew about Hudson time. It started with Finn, mostly. He always had a tendency to run a few minutes behind, but once he had started dating Rachel, she had made sure that he showed up either on time or early. Once Jack had been born, however, Finn fell back into old habits. As they had more children, Finn had found himself showing up at least fifteen minutes late to any family event.
Harper and Caroline were easily the worst offenders behind their father. Caroline generally didn't ever care that she was late. She was so much like her mother that she always managed to deflect with charm. Harper, on the other hand, always tried to never be late. She still somehow managed to be five minutes behind every time.
"Hudson time doesn't apply to me," Jack said as he held his hands up. "It's all the sports. If you don't show up fifteen minutes early, you're late."
"You sound like Mom," Harper, Caroline, and Michael said at the same time. Jack's ears turned red as Morgan and Wyatt started laughing loudly.
Before Jack could give an appropriate, sibling-like retort, they heard a loud and familiar commotion from the lobby. They all exchanged looks, and Harper and Morgan quickly finished their drinks. If they didn't make themselves presentable in the lobby, Kurt would surely have something to say about it.
"Hummel, get the fuck away from me."
"Puckerman, just let me—"
"No! Back off, or I'm gonna fuck with your hair."
"It will bring together your whole outfit—"
"I don't need a fucking pocket square to tie my outfit together, Hummel!"
Quinn sighed and shook her head. "You know, it still amuses me that my husband talks about tying outfits together as often as he does."
Puck shot his wife a dirty look and crossed his arms over his chest. She was right, and he wasn't going to apologize for it. Besides, knowing how to properly dress was actually a fairly useful skill. Not that he would ever admit it out loud. To anyone. Ever. Quinn smiled pleasantly at him and then blew him a kiss. Puck rolled his eyes but wrapped an arm around her, pulling her into his side as he pressed his lips to her temple.
Finn and Rachel had come down in the elevator with them, each one of them carrying Sydney and Delilah respectively. Santana, Brittney, and Blaine came down in the elevator next to them, and the lobby was suddenly filled with the Hudsons and the rest of their extended family. Harper shared a look with each of her siblings before they crossed from the hotel bar to the lobby. Just as Harper stopped next to her parents, a blinding flash went off in front of her eyes.
Blinking rapidly, Harper promptly tripped over her own feet. Having become accustomed to being so clumsy over the years, Harper managed to right herself, but it was partially because of the steadying hand Wyatt had on her elbow. Harper shot a thankful look over her shoulder at him as her cheeks flushed, before she turned to the man and woman pair she had never seen before.
"Um… hi. Who are you?" Harper asked. She caught sight of the camera straps around both of their necks, so it was pretty easy to fill in the blanks.
"Oh, I hired them for the weekend," Kurt told her in an almost absent-minded sort of way. "They're a brother and sister pair that I heard about in the city, really up-and-coming in event planning circles. Peter and Pam." With that information imparted, Kurt turned to Peter and Pam and directed them on what kind of pictures he wanted taken at the dinner.
Harper turned helpless eyes to her parents. "Photographers?" Wyatt squeezed her elbow comfortingly, and Harper couldn't help the smile that turned up her lips. While she had to admit that it would be nice to have some professionally done pictures of the hooding ceremony and the celebration after, she wasn't sure that they needed one for the whole weekend.
Finn just shook his head and squeezed Harper's shoulder in sympathy. This was not his first rodeo—he'd been to plenty events Kurt had planned where a professional photographer had shown up. The one he had hired when Burt and Carole sold their childhood home came to mind.
Rachel just shook her head. While she was used to this, too, it still caught her by surprise every time it happened. Of course, it was Santana who saved the moment.
"Oh, come on Hudson Two. We're going to get a shit ton of beautiful pictures from this weekend. Out of everything that your uncle could pull, this has got to be in like, the bottom three." Santana ruffled Harper's curly hair and then flipped her middle finger up at Kurt when he yelled at her.
Finn and Jack both took control of the situation, as they often did during times like these. It was reminiscent of the Disney trip four years ago—Finn herded the adults, while Jack got all of the kids into order. Luckily, the restaurant Kurt had selected for that night was only five minutes away. The huge group was situated into a private room with their own bartender and group of servers, and the dinner actually turned out fairly nice, with minimal incident.
Everyone was tired from traveling, so the night ended not long after dinner concluded. Jack and Wyatt had an early practice the following morning, but promised to come to the hotel and hang out with everyone once they were done. While Jack, Morgan, and their half-asleep children were saying goodbye to everyone else, Wyatt had pulled Harper aside and hugged her tightly, murmuring that he was glad that he was going to get to see her tomorrow. Of course, no one had missed that little exchange, but Harper had bolted into the elevator, claiming that she had several seminars to attend the following day and needed to get to bed.
Harper and Caroline went to their room, where Harper steadfastly ignored Caroline's not-so-gentle teasing about the crush she had on Wyatt. Harper turned on a Hallmark movie and fell asleep with the television still on.
The following morning, Harper was up early to grab coffee and breakfast before she had to go to McKinley's campus in order to make it to the seminars. Before the hooding ceremony took place, the program required a few extra classes—labs, language seminars, trainings with screeners and assessments—because they wanted to squeeze in as much extra work as possible. The graduate students more or less bore the workload with good grace, knowing the finish line was near.
Harper met up with Sloan and the rest of their friends from the program and made it through most of the day without much complaint. It was around lunch, with one last seminar to attend, that things began to get interesting.
"Oh, Harper, I'm glad I caught you!"
Harper looked up from her bowl of soup, blinking in surprise as her Uncle Kurt bustled in to the dining hall (the program gave all of the students free meal vouchers for the weekend), looking for all the world as if he belonged there. He joined her group at the table they were spread out at, plopping down a huge navy blue binder in front of her.
"I had a few questions for you," Kurt continued as he pulled up a chair to the corner of their table. Harper eyed him for a long moment, noting that he didn't have any sort of visitor's badge displayed on his lime green jacket.
"How did you get on campus without a school ID?" Harper asked. The school ID was required for admittance to any building on campus, and Harper could think of no reason for Kurt to have one.
Kurt waved his hand dismissively and didn't actually answer the question. "Obviously, we have a theme going with your school colors. But I wanted to ask you if you wanted your cake to be Kelly green, as well. It's such an… intense color."
Harper's eye twitched. "Uncle Kurt, you're wearing a lime green suit jacket. And it's shiny." Of course, he was pulling it off in only the way that Kurt Hummel-Anderson could. Harper was just pointing out that he didn't have much room to make comments about intense colors.
Kurt shot his niece a look but didn't bother to respond to that comment. "All I'm saying is, that would be a lot of Kelly green in one place. Perhaps we could do your cake in gold?"
Yeah, because gold was a much less intense color. "Uncle Kurt, you can pick whatever color for the cake that you want. I just want to make sure that the flavor is chocolate." Harper leaned back in her chair and couldn't help the smirk that formed on her lips. "And you better watch what you say about that particular shade of green. We love that color around here." Ever since the Philadelphia Eagles had brought back their Kelly green jerseys, the city had really embraced the color.
"We?" Kurt's voice went up an octave. "Harper Hudson, you are from New York City."
"And I can love more than one city," Harper retorted, having had this conversation more than once with various members of her family. They couldn't quite get over the fact that Jack and Harper had fully embraced the Philadelphia spirit.
Kurt just waved his hand dismissively. "Anyway, I wanted to see if you have time later today for your dress fitting."
On the other side of the table, Sloan and their two other friends, Zoe and Trina, could barely suppress their laughter at the look on Harper's face. "What dress fitting?" she said with a sigh.
"The one for your dress for your graduation party. Duh."
"I… okay." It was a safe bet that if she had a dress fitting, it was likely that her sister, mother, and aunts had one too. So she likely wouldn't be alone. "We're done class at three."
"Perfect! The fitting is at three-thirty! I'll send you the address." Kurt quickly kissed her cheek and got up, bustling out of the dining hall again. He waved at the security guard by the front desk, who greeted him by name.
"Seriously," Harper said to her friends. "How did he get into the dining hall without an ID?"
"Check the time."
Finn groaned and didn't lift his head. Instead, he used the arm he had wrapped around his wife's waist to pull her closer, tucking the curves of her body more snugly against the harder lines of his. "Nope. Can't move."
"Finn."
"What? It's totally your fault."
Rachel smiled and buried her face against her husband's chest. After almost thirty-five years of marriage, she loved that they could still feel like this. Wrapped up in Finn's arms, she felt boneless, sated, and happy. While she felt bad that Kurt was likely off torturing her children somewhere, Rachel enjoyed the time alone she got with her husband.
Still, she knew that they needed to get moving soon. "I'd like to get something to eat before we go pick up the kids."
Of course, since they were all in Philadelphia together, Kurt had made sure to put a Phillies game into the itinerary. It was always a joy to watch Jack play, and they especially loved it when they got to see him play on his home field. There was something special about Phillies fans, despite the reputation they had.
They were all going to tailgate in the VIP lot, and out of all of the things Kurt did well, he knew how to put together an excellent tailgate. He often partnered with Puck to do it, and it was one of the times that they got along surprisingly well. They would watch the game in the family box, which was always a treat, and she was sure all of the kids would go out if the Phillies won. Given the way they had been playing so far, even though it was early in the season, it was looking good for them.
Finn and Rachel were going to go pick up their granddaughters and spend the afternoon with them before the game, while Jack would obviously prepare and do press, and Morgan would get ready with the rest of the kids.
Before their jam-packed afternoon and night, Rachel was going to need some food. She needed to replenish her energy if she was going to spend the afternoon chasing after her granddaughters. Based on the smirk that Finn was giving her, he was thinking the same thing. Rachel rolled her eyes but couldn't help her giggle as she nudged him in the side.
"Come on," Rachel encouraged. "We should stop for some coffee, too. We're going to be up late tonight because of the game."
"Hmph." Finn squeezed Rachel to him again and kissed her temple before he sat up. Jack always met them in the family box after whatever game they managed to make it to, and they spent some time together before all of the kids went out. "Do you think Logan will show up with Jack?"
Now Rachel was laughing outright. Finn was generally so easy-going, but she found it to be endlessly cute when he got grumpy like this. It was clear that he hadn't missed the sparks between their oldest daughter and Wyatt Logan, like everyone else… expect for Harper herself, that is.
"You're going to have to get over it," Rachel advised, like she did whenever any of their kids had gone on dates over the years. "Wyatt seems pretty determined to get Harper to notice him. And he's a good kid. Jack wouldn't be best friends with him if he wasn't."
"Yeah… I guess," Finn grumbled. "That doesn't mean I have to like it."
six.
It seemed that with every hour that passed, more of her family showed up. While Harper really appreciated the support and the enthusiasm her family was displaying, the school had only supplied her with four tickets for graduation. She had begged and pleaded for months and finally managed to scrape together enough extra tickets for Michael, Morgan, Kurt, and Blaine. Thankfully, since her nieces were under the age of five, they didn't require tickets for admittance into the hooding ceremony.
Harper stared at the people gathered in Kurt and Blaine's suite at the hotel—Puck and Quinn's sons, Ezra, Leo, and Milo, and Kurt and Blaine's twins, Penelope and Aiden—and shook her head slowly. She was so happy that they were all here, and she was honestly worried for the city of Philadelphia, because New York City could barely handle her family when they were all in one place at the same time.
"Um…" Harper could feel the rising panic. "I can't get any more tickets for the hooding ceremony. The graduation affairs office almost took away the ones I had because I wouldn't leave them alone until I got the extra ones."
Kurt bustled by where all of the kids—despite the fact that the oldest one of them was almost thirty-four, that's what the parents still called them—were gathered in the living room of the suite. He was carrying a three-foot cut out of McKinley College's white and green lion mascot. Where he had managed to get that, Harper couldn't begin to imagine.
"Don't worry about that, Harper," Kurt told her. He propped the mascot cut out against the wall, titled it at an angle, and studied it for a long moment. Then he shook his head and shifted it to the left before nodding in satisfaction. "I have the ticket situation all under control."
Harper blinked. Was her uncle secretly on the board at McKinley College, or something? "What?"
"Don't worry about it," Kurt said again. "Now, do you have your jersey ready for the Phillies game tonight? We need to leave in an hour for the tailgate. I want to steam everyone's jerseys before then."
"Dad." Penelope, who was currently in medical school at Columbia, rolled her eyes in a long-suffering manor she had inherited from her father. "You don't need to steam sports jerseys. It like, totally defeats the purpose."
"And do you really have time to get… what, twenty jerseys steamed in less than an hour?" Aiden knew that Kurt would want to inspect everyone's appearance before leaving, despite the fact that they would all be wearing matching red and white Hudson jerseys. They were all used to it at this point, though.
"Yes," Kurt told his son without batting an eye.
"You should know better than to challenge your dad and his travel steamer, son," Blaine added as he ruffled Aiden's dark, curly hair.
"Get going, all of you," Kurt ordered. "I want everyone down in the lobby in forty minutes. Morgan, the girls, and Finn and Rachel will meet us at Citizen's Bank Park, and I need to have time to call them to make sure they're not running late."
Harper had gone down to the coffee shop in the lobby and had picked up lattes for her and Caroline before she headed back up to the room. Like the good sister she was, she had already dug out the jerseys and had laid them out. As Harper handed the latte to her younger sister, she didn't miss the smirk she was sending her way.
"What's that look for?" Harper demanded.
"Nothing," Caroline said quickly. "Thanks for the coffee, Harps."
Sending a suspicious look Caroline's way, Harper decided to let it drop for now. She sprayed some dry shampoo in her hair, fluffed her curls, and changed into a pair of denim shorts and the red and white Phillies jersey. She followed Caroline out of their room, sipping at her coffee.
There was a sea of Hudsons and various extended family members in the lobby, all drawing attention due to the matching Phillies jerseys they were wearing. Harper doubted that there had been that many people wearing a Hudson jersey in one place before.
"I can't believe you bought us all new jerseys, Uncle Kurt," Harper said once she spotted him. "Thank you. It was really generous of you."
Kurt was grinning at her, looking very pleased with himself for a reason that Harper couldn't quite figure out. "I got them on sale," he said. "It really was no big deal." Plus, the pictures they were going to get at the tailgate in their matching jerseys was going to be fabulous.
Aiden and Michael exchanged a look. "Must have been some sale, Dad," Aiden said. They were both grinning at Harper as well, and she shot them an odd look, but decided to ignore them. Her younger brother and cousin often acted like this, and it was safer to just let it go.
In fact, every member of her family was grinning at her and laughing, and no one would let Harper in on the joke. Santana and Quinn kept nudging each other, and Puck had a look on his face that was half-disgruntled, and half-amused. It wasn't until they got to the tailgate that Harper finally figured out what all of the smirks were for.
Harper greeted her parents and turned around to get a drink from one of the coolers. She heard her father make a choking sound and then he demanded, "Harper Anne Hudson! Why does it say Logan on the back of your jersey?"
"What?" Harper grabbed the shoulder of her jersey and tugged on it until she could see the lettering. Sure enough, she could so the 'L' instead of the 'H.' She could feel her face turn bright red as she whipped around and shrieked, "Sergeant McFancy Pants!"
"All I'm saying is that it was a completely premature and unnecessary use of Sergeant McFancy Pants." Even as his ears turned red as he uttered his much-annoying nickname, Kurt still had that smug look on his face. He was quite proud of himself, even as his brother kept shooting him dirty looks.
"I don't know, I thought it was a very appropriate use," Finn mumbled darkly. He narrowed his eyes at Kurt again, crossing his arms over his chest. He got nudged in either side by both his wife and Quinn, but he still kept his scowl trained on Kurt.
Once Harper realized that she was the only one wearing a Wyatt Logan jersey, the stubborn streak she inherited from her mother kicked in, and she refused to take it off. She listened to Kurt's explanation— "Harper, the Hudson jerseys had sold out, and I had to pick up a Logan jersey so that everyone had one! I thought I put that one in Michael's suitcase, not yours."—which she hadn't bought for a second, since Michael was so much taller than her, so there was no way that Kurt would "accidentally" switch their jersey sizes.
She eventually got over it and they all enjoyed the game, and was thrilled when the Phillies won their game. They didn't have to wait that long for Jack to make his way up to the family box, and he was closely followed by Wyatt. Finn snorted and took a long drink of his beer, scowling again when his wife poked him in the shoulder.
Jack made his way over to his wife and kissed her, and then scooped up his half-asleep daughters. Finn and Rachel were on granddaughter duty for the night, but Rachel had insisted on staying until they could see Wyatt's reaction to seeing Harper in his jersey. Caroline had texted Jack to give him a heads up on what had gone down, and he could only shake his head in amusement as he waited to see what Wyatt's reaction would be, as well.
They didn't have to wait long, and they certainly weren't disappointed. Harper was over near the windows with Caroline, Morgan, and Penelope, lined up shoulder to shoulder as they drank and chatted. Wyatt made his way over to the bar and got himself a beer, opened it and turned to face the windows just as he took a long sip. The smile of victory was on his face as his eyes scanned the people in the box, clearly looking for someone.
And find her, he did. He had studied the back of Harper Hudson's head enough to recognize her mass of curly, dark hair anywhere, and his eyes tracked down, settling on the name emblazoned across her jersey. When he registered that it was his own last name, he promptly choked on the beer he was in the middle of swallowing.
As he coughed and spluttered, Rachel, Quinn, Santana, Brittany, and Kurt didn't bother to hide their laughter. Even Finn and Puck chuckled, having to admit that they now saw the amusement in the situation. It was pretty comical the way Wyatt's eyes widened as he took in Harper wearing his jersey. What Finn wasn't so fond of, however, was when Wyatt finally got a hold of himself, smirked, and made his way over to Harper.
"Time to go," Rachel murmured in Finn's ear as she nodded her head in the direction of her granddaughters. There was no way that she was going to let Finn ruin this for their daughter.
Harper sensed it the second Wyatt was at her side. She looked up from where some of the players were still finishing up press on the field after their win, cheeks immediately flushing as she watched the way his hazel eyes changed to a deeper, more golden shade.
"Hey," Wyatt greeted with a grin. "Nice jersey."
Instead of saying anything, Harper made a noise in the back of her throat. He lifted his beer to his lips and nudged her shoulder with his, his sparking with amusement, happiness, and a heat that Harper finally recognized for the first time. Biting her lip, she nudged his shoulder in return with her own.
"Nice game," she finally said. "That out you made in the fifth inning… it was spectacular."
To Harper's surprise, Wyatt flushed a little, and a slow grin spread across his lips. He leaned closer, until his side was lightly pressed against hers. Harper felt her heart beating fast in her chest, and she licked her lips as she let her body relax against his. Out the corner of her eye, she noticed that Caroline, Morgan, and Penelope oh so casually move away from them. Unable to help herself, Harper looked over her shoulder and saw Kurt watching them avidly, with the same knowing smirk he had been wearing for hours. She saw her father, too, with that half-grumpy, half-resigned look on his face.
Wyatt turned to see what she was looking at. Catching sight of the look on Finn's face, he winced and chuckled. "Your dad is going to kill me," he murmured to her.
Harper's brow furrowed. "Why? You're Jack's best friend. He likes you!"
Wyatt's lips parted and he stared at her for a long moment before he lifted his beer to his mouth, drinking half of it quickly. When he saw that Harper was still waiting for some sort of response from him, he started to smile again. "You really have no idea, do you?"
She was aware of the box beginning to empty. Caroline, Morgan, Penelope, and Kurt were herding the rest of their family out, and she didn't miss the knowing look Jack shot them as he left. Harper was aware that everyone knew about her crush on Wyatt, but was he insinuating…?
"Wow." Wyatt watched all of those emotions flicker over Harper's expressive face. "You really don't."
They were alone now in the box. The cleaning crew would be coming through soon, so they really only had a couple of minutes. But it was enough time for Wyatt to take Harper gently by the shoulders and turn her to face him. She looked up at him with wide eyes, reaching up to grasp his wrist with her right hand. Her thumb brushed across the pulse point at his wrist, and she felt that his heart was beating just as fast as hers.
"Harper. I like you," Wyatt said, his voice low and serious.
Her mouth fell open. "What?" She knew what he meant, she wasn't dumb—she just hadn't been expecting him to ever say it, let alone come right out and do it like that. The thought that all along, he had returned her feelings… it was mind-boggling.
He seemed to know what she meant, though. He smiled at her, one hand coming up to cup her cheek. "I like you," he repeated.
And then he was leaning forward, moving slowly, watching her reaction carefully. He gave her plenty of time to move away if she wanted, wordlessly asking for her permission. She happily gave it to him, lifting her chin up to meet his lips with hers.
"You kissed him!"
Harper winced and covered her ears with her hands. They had all gone out to Xfinity Live last night, had a bit too much to drink, and had stayed out way too late. Luckily, they graduate students only had one final seminar that Friday, with the hooding ceremony taking place that Saturday. So Harper had been able to power through, and then her friends from the program, along with her Caroline, Morgan, and Penelope, had gone out to lunch.
"I mean… yeah." Harper could feel her cheeks flushing, but she could stop the wide smile from spreading across her lips. There had been kissing. Lots of kissing. Wyatt and Harper couldn't seem to keep their hands off of one another, and he had asked her out on their first official date for that Sunday. Harper had gleefully accepted.
It turned out that Jack had known about Wyatt and Harper's feelings for one another for quite some time (he couldn't ignore it when his wife was constantly pointing it out), and had been waiting for the two of them to get over themselves. There was something about the graduation weekend that had encouraged Wyatt to finally take a chance, and Harper was thrilled that he had.
"What a weekend!" Sloan exclaimed. "Oh my god, you totally have to bring him as your plus-one to my wedding. I'll completely forgive the fact that he plays for the Phillies."
Harper rolled her eyes but didn't bother commenting on what Sloan said. Sloan was from Atlanta and was a fan of the Braves, who had a notorious rivalry with the Phillies. Both Sloan and Harper had agreed had jokingly agreed not to let their loyalty to their respective teams get in the way of their friendship.
"I knew it. I knew it all along," Caroline declared. "I totally knew this was going to happen."
"Oh, you did not."
"Please, you were obsessed with Wyatt ever since Jack's first game with him."
"I was not!"
"Girls. Play nice."
All the women at the table in the restaurant they were having lunch at looked up, blinking in surprise as Kurt came bustling in, arms laden down with four shopping bags stuffed to the brim. He carried them with ease, likely brought on by impressive arm strength borne of many a shopping trip. Sloan leaned over to whisper in Harper's ear.
"How did he know where we were at?" They had decided to take lunch at an off-campus café that was really only known to those who attended McKinley College. They had the best lattes.
"Look, I wasn't joking when I said that my Uncle Kurt put trackers on us," Harper said. "I swear, before he started working for Vogue, he was part of the CIA."
Penelope leaned over to peer into one of the bags that Kurt was carrying. "What are those, Dad?" she asked.
"Favors for the party tomorrow," Kurt explained. "I had them specially made."
"Favors?" Curious now, Harper leaned over as well, trying to peer into the bag. She caught sight of the Tastykake logo and smiled in amusement. It seemed that Kurt had put together favors containing things typically found in Philly. "It's a really nice idea, Uncle Kurt, but are you sure that this isn't too much? Graduation parties don't really need to have favors…" She trailed off at the look on Kurt's face.
"Every party needs to have favors," Kurt told he seriously. "Every. Single. One."
"I… okay," Harper said. She knew when to pick her battles, and it was honestly easier at this point to just go along with whatever Kurt wanted.
"Dad, did Harps get to pick out anything for herself at this party?" Penelope asked, mostly just to annoy her father. Every birthday party or significant life event she ever had was always blown out of proportion because of her father's tendency to go overboard, never mind her papa's attempts to rein him in. Penelope and Aiden had both agreed that they planned on eloping when the time came for their marriages.
Kurt lifted his chin. "I made sure to pick all of Harper's favorite things. And she gave me access to her Spotify playlist ages ago, so the party will have an excellent playlist."
"We're having a DJ?" Harper asked in surprise.
"Of course not. There's going to be a twelve-piece band!"
Well, that sounded more like it. For as long as she could remember, Kurt had always insisted that any party needed to have a live band, and not a DJ. Although Kurt had always managed to book spectacular bands, so the entertainment was always top notch—something that appeased Rachel, thankfully.
"The cake will be chocolate layered with chocolate mousse and whipped chocolate frosting," Kurt continued. "With a layer of raspberry puree. I think I covered it, yes?"
Harper was practically salivating at the description of that cake. "Oh, if that's what you picked for the cake, then I totally trust anything else you might have chosen." She really didn't mind that Kurt had planned this whole party without any of her own input. She trusted his taste, and she was actually very thankful that he wanted to go out of his way to plan such an extravagant party for her.
"Excellent." Kurt smiled at Harper and patted her shoulder before he grew serious once again. "You know what dress you're supposed to wear tonight, correct? All of you?" Kurt cast his gaze over everyone at the table. "It's important that we coordinate tonight. The outfits I've chosen tonight will match with the menu."
And then he had to go and say things like that. No one was quite sure how coordinating outfits could match with a menu, of all things, but they had all learned various ways of getting around it over the years. This time around, Harper had the perfect response to it.
"Sure, Uncle Kurt," she said sweetly.
That seemed to satisfy Kurt, and he bustled out of the restaurant, disappearing as quickly as he came. Caroline immediately opened her mouth to protest having to wear yet another Kurt-approved outfit—despite his fantastic taste, sometimes it was nice to choose one's own outfit—but Harper held her hand up and took her phone out.
She sent out a text message to the Sergeant McFancy Pants chat that they had started around the time of Jack's sweet sixteen party. It contained only two words: "It's time."
Finn and Rachel had been lounging in bed when their phones chimed at the same time. Seeing that it was in the SMFP group chat (they often used the acronym in the hopes that Kurt wouldn't find out about it), they both started laughing at the same time. The laughter only increased when they opened the text and saw their oldest daughter's message.
"Guess he finally got on her nerves enough," Finn quipped as he rolled out of bed and pulled on his boxers.
"You know how easy-going Harper is," Rachel pointed out. "It's probably because your brother has a tendency to show up, unannounced, wherever she is without actually saying how he knew she was there."
"Oh, he's my brother now?" Finn arched an eyebrow at his wife. "I thought he was your friend."
"He was your brother before he was my friend!" Rachel climbed out of the bed as well and sauntered slowly towards Finn, unafraid to use her body to her advantage. She was satisfied when she saw Finn's eyes darken, and he reached out to put his hands on her waist.
Finn drew Rachel closer to him, until her body was pressed against his. He kissed her slowly, deeply, and despite the hours they had spent together in bed before—they really were getting the most out of this vacation—she wanted him again. Still, they had a dinner to get ready for.
"Finn…"
"Excuse me, you started this."
"Hey." She smiled at him and ran her hands up his chest. "I was just going to ask you if you had all of the shirts."
He knew what she really meant by that, and he chuckled. "Yes, I have all of the shirts. Harper and Santana made sure to remind me."
"Oh. Good." Taking his hands in hers, Rachel began to tug Finn towards the bathroom. "Well, since that's settled, why don't we shower together before the dinner? You know, to conserve water and all."
"Sure." Finn was grinning as he followed Rachel into the bathroom. He hopped on one foot as he stripped his boxers off once again. "That's why you want to shower together."
seven.
Kurt was the last one to arrive to the dinner. He had no problem being fashionably late, and he also maintained that he had to make sure everything and everyone was in order before he got anywhere when their entire family was involved. He also fully admitted to wanting to make an entrance everywhere he went.
This time was no different. His suit was an exquisite shade of lilac that was so light it almost looked gray. He had paired it with a Kelly green pocket square in deference to the graduation weekend, and it went surprisingly well with the color of his suit. Kurt had his eyes on his phone as he bustled in to the private room at the fancy steakhouse he had booked their Friday night dinner, as he was finalizing some of the details for the flowers for the party on Saturday.
"I hope you didn't wait to order," Kurt began as he finished up his text message. "Because I wanted everyone to get a picture on the art museum steps, and—what. THE HELL. Are THOSE."
Everyone burst into laughter at the same time. They all looked ridiculous in their bright pink t-shirts and jeans, sitting in one of the nicest restaurants in the city. Kurt's mouth dropped open, and all he could do was gape like a fish. When he saw what was printed across the shirts, only a strangled sound escaped him.
Sergeant McFancy Pants Brigade.
"I haven't even been that bad!" Kurt exclaimed when he finally managed to find his voice.
"Uncle Kurt, you managed to get onto the college's campus without a school-issued ID. Or a guest pass," Harper pointed out.
"So?" Kurt said, and it was absolutely maddening that he wasn't revealing how he had managed to pull that off.
Puck got up and made his way over to Kurt, gleefully slapping him on the back so hard that Kurt's entire body jolted. "Come on, McFancy Pants. You should really expect it at this point. I'm kind of surprised that we haven't made t-shirts before this."
Honestly, so was Kurt. He mumbled darkly under his breath but otherwise didn't say anything, choosing instead to plop into the empty chair at the head of the table. He ordered a dirty martini and was gratified when their waiter brought it to him quickly. He promptly drained half of it in one gulp and ordered another one.
"I can't believe you're all wearing this at one of the nicest restaurants in Philadelphia," Kurt groused as he surveyed his family in their all their pink t-shirt glory. "Do you know how far in advanced I had to call to get these reservations?"
"Please." Jack, his namesake, the one that really should have been on his side, waved his hand dismissively. "All I had to do was make one phone call explaining the situation, and they were happy to wave the dress code for us."
Kurt rolled his eyes, but didn't have anything to say to that. It was true, this city did love their players. Jack had likely laid the Hudson charm on pretty thick, too. "We're still getting the pictures done on the art museum steps," Kurt declared. He didn't care if they were all wearing those ridiculous shirts. He would make it work.
Blaine grinned at his husband. "I was hoping you would say that." He waved a white t-shirt in front of Kurt's face, and he snatched it away from Blaine and held it up, already knowing what it was going to say.
The white t-shirt had Sergeant McFancy Pants printed across it in big, bright pink letters. Kurt heaved a gusty sigh, shed his suit jacket, and then pulled the t-shirt on over his button down shirt. He saw the delighted look on Harper's face and knew that, as ridiculous as this was, it was making everyone practically giddy.
Wyatt arrived then, with Aiden, Ezra, Leo, and Milo in tow. Everyone had known that they were going to be late, since Jack had arranged for Wyatt to give them a private tour of Citizen's Bank Park. Of course, they were all wearing their pink shirts—even Wyatt. When Harper saw that he was matching them, and had been willing to do so in public, she jumped out of her chair and threw herself into his arms.
"I can't believe you're wearing one of the shirts!" Harper exclaimed before she kissed Wyatt soundly. He laughed against her lips and wrapped his arms around her as he kissed her back, losing himself in her for a long moment before he remembered that they were in a room full of her family.
"I can't believe he's willingly wearing one of the shirts, either," Kurt mumbled into his martini.
"Your aunt made sure I got one," Wyatt murmured in Harper's ear as he tilted his chin towards Santana. "I thought the whole plan was pretty hilarious." He kissed her cheek, unable to help himself, and then followed her back to her seat at the table, sitting in the empty chair next to her.
They were seated across from Finn and Rachel. Rachel was watching her daughter with shining eyes, thrilled to see her so happy. Finn stared at the pair for a long moment, his face unreadable. Wyatt stared back, respectful but unwavering. Harper just raised her eyebrow at her father and deliberately took Wyatt's hand in her own. He squeezed her hand in return before flipping it over so their palms were pressed together and his fingers could tangle with hers.
Finally, Finn relaxed and nodded his head. He even managed a small smile when Rachel poked him in the side. After another beat, his smile widened, and he laughed. It was hard to be too serious when they were all wearing their Sergeant McFancy Pants Brigade shirts.
The hooding ceremony had gone off beautifully. The whole ceremony itself had only taken an hour, but it had been meaningful and impactful despite its short run time. Every single person in their family—including Burt, Carole, Hiram, and Leroy, who had all made it to Philadelphia early that Saturday morning—had a spot in the audience.
Harper certainly had the largest number of people in attendance, and she still couldn't quite figure out how Kurt had managed to get all of the tickets. They were easy to spot, too, since Kurt had insisted they all dress in various shades of green in order to "stay on theme." They took up almost four rows of the audience, all of them whooping and cheering loudly as Harper walked across the stage to receive her hood.
As they were all filing back to their seats to complete the ceremony, Harper's program advisor asked her lowly, "How did your family get all those tickets?"
It was truly wild that even members of the faculty had no idea how Kurt managed to get that many tickets. "My Uncle Kurt," Harper explained. At the confused look on her advisor's face, she continued, "He has magic voodoo powers, or something. I honestly don't know."
Her advisor laughed at that and then went over to the other faculty members in attendance, likely to share the story of Harper Hudson's crazy family. Harper shook her head and laughed as she made her way back to her seat, looking over her shoulder and standing up slightly so that she could send a very pointed look Kurt's way. She had a feeling that she would never find out how Kurt had managed to get his hands on so many tickets, but she had a feeling that some slightly illegal bribery had been involved.
"Wait, we have to change?" Puck groaned and shard a commiserating look with Santana. "Fuck, Kurt, I've never packed a bag for a trip that's been so heavy in my life, and that includes the trip to Disney."
Kurt eyed Puck in a somewhat derisive manner. "What, are all those muscles just for show, then?"
"Hey! I work hard to look this good." Puck flexed his arm and kissed his bicep, and both Quinn and Rachel rolled their eyes at his antics.
"Oh, brother," Rachel muttered under her breath. She left Puck and Quinn's hotel suite then and returned to her own, because she didn't need to hear anymore of her older brother's preening.
"Quit your complaining, then," Kurt continued. "The outfits for the hooding ceremony and the pictures were one thing. The party is a formal affair, though, and it requires—"
"A fucking tuxedo. I know," Puck grumbled. He couldn't believe that he was being forced to wear a tuxedo on what was basically supposed to be a vacation.
"Harper has no problems with the dress code," Kurt pointed out. Since she was the guest of honor, he was going to use her as the barometer of the night's events.
Quinn, who had no problem with the dress code for the night but was still chaffing over the fact that she had to wrangle four tuxedos for her husband and sons, said, "Yeah, that's because you got her a beautiful couture dress to wear for the night."
Kurt shrugged his shoulders, completely unapologetic. "So?" He had no problem with bribing the kids into doing what he wanted. Over the years, the bribes had ranged from extra dessert, extended curfews, money, designer clothes, and concert tickets. Kurt relished using his connections and his nieces, nephews, and own children loved using it whenever they could.
"Harper has no problem with the dress code," Kurt said again, this time practically shouting, so everyone could hear it. "And since it's her party, I think we should go along with what she wants without complaint."
"Yeah, the party that you planned for her, Sergeant McFancy Pants," Puck pointed out under his breath. His voice was loud enough for Kurt to hear, and the tips of Kurt's ears turned purple at the mention of his nickname. Despite the fact that it had been over thirty years since he had first heard it, it still got to him.
There was a part of Kurt, that despite it all, secretly loved the nickname. He wouldn't continue planning parties and pulling ridiculous stunts if he didn't like it. He knew, as soon as the binders and the laminated time tables came out, that someone in his family would inevitably drop that dreaded nickname. And Kurt loved it.
He wasn't about to actually admit that out loud, though. Wearing the Sergeant McFancy Pants t-shirt in one of the nicest restaurants in Philadelphia was enough of a giveaway as it was. Kurt just sniffed in response to Puck's comment and shoved a bowtie against his chest, patting it when Puck grunted a rude curse at him.
"Kurt!" Rachel's shrill voiced easily reached them from further up in the hallway of the hotel. "Why is someone here to do my hair?"
Kurt heaved a long-suffering sigh, as though he was the one being put upon. "Because you need help, Rachel Hudson!" he called as he left Puck and Quinn's suite.
Puck and Quinn exchanged a look. If there was someone at Finn and Rachel's room to do hair, there was no doubt that they would be making their way down the hallway soon enough for the rest of them. Puck was tempted to shave his old mohawk back into his hair just to watch Kurt's head explode.
Harper clenched the tulle skirt of her emerald-green, floor-length evening gown between her fingers and looked around, taking in the number of people that had already arrived to her graduation party. She had followed Kurt's instructions to the letter, including the one that she wear her curly hair down around her shoulders, with only the front parts pulled back in tiny braids. It had been an oddly specific direction, but Harper had to admit that the end result paired well with the dress Kurt had chosen for her.
Her parents, aunts, and uncles weren't yet among the number of attendees, yet. Yet all of their children were already there, and gleefully partaking in the open bar and the Philly-themed appetizers (cheesesteak eggrolls, mini pieces of scrabble on toast, bite-sized chunks of hoagies, and soft pretzels). Harper had been hovering by the entrance to the party for the past ten minutes, trying to see when her parents and the rest of their family would arrive.
"Would you relax?" Caroline demanded as she shoved a flute of champagne into Harper's hand. "This is your party. You're supposed to be having a good time, you know."
"I know, I—" Harper choked on the words she was about to say as she took in the appearance of the newest arrival. It was Wyatt, looking for all the world as if he had been born to wear a tuxedo. He had his hands shoved into the pockets of his trousers, looking completely relaxed despite the formal dress code.
Wyatt gave Harper a crooked smile. "Hey."
Harper let out a slow breath and downed half of her champagne in one gulp. "Hey." Then she was suddenly in Wyatt's arms, kissing him deeply. His hands traced over the bare skin on her upper back, bared by the dress that Kurt had chosen for her, and she shivered against him.
They only parted when they heard someone clearing their throat. Harper pulled back from Wyatt, thinking that it might have been Caroline, ready to tease them. She was standing there, of course, looking gleeful, but it was the sight of her father and uncles by her side that made Harper pause.
Finn looked like he was gearing up for his typical "If-you-hurt-my-daughter-I'll-end-you" speech, but his oldest daughter cut him off by holding up her hand. She pinned him with a look that she had inherited from her mother, and her younger sister sniggered next to her. Really, the two of them tag-teaming like this was wholly unfair.
"Not now," Harper pleaded. "Just…" She looked up at Wyatt, who was standing by her side, ready to support her. He reached for her hand and squeezed, and she smiled as she squeezed his hand in return, interlacing their fingers. "I'm happy, Daddy," she finally whispered. She felt Wyatt take another step closer to her, his free hand landing on the small of her back, clearly affected by what she just said.
Finn watched the young couple for a long moment before he finally nodded his head, accepting what he had known since he watched his daughter and Wyatt Logan first interact several years ago. It didn't help when his oldest son suddenly appeared at his side, but the glass of scotch he pressed into his father's hand certainly eased things a bit.
"Told you so," Jack said in a sing-song voice. He had seen the sparks, and he had just been waiting. The week before Harper had arrived in the city for the hooding ceremony, Wyatt had approached Jack and had told his friend about his intentions to ask his sister out. Jack, of course, had been thrilled by the idea. Although he didn't want to imagine his little sister doing anything, ever, with any boy, the thought of one of his best friends becoming a part of his family was great. He knew Wyatt was a good guy. He and Harper would make a good pair.
"Yeah, yeah," Finn grumbled. He was slightly gratified when Rachel came up beside him and slid her hand into his. No matter the craziness he had to go through because of his family, he could always count on Rachel, the love of his life, no matter what.
"So the graduation girl isn't generally supposed to make a speech, but I'm hoping you'll all forgive me this deviation from tradition." Harper smiled the Hudson charm smile as she stood in the front of the ballroom, taking in all of the guests that Kurt had seen fit to invite. God, there must have been over a hundred people there.
"This weekend has been crazy, to say the least," Harper continued. "McKinley College insisted on giving us work until the very last moment. But we knew we could handle it." Harper winked at the group of her graduate school buddies, and their cheered in response. "But we made it, somehow. After three years, long hours, and too many group projects… we made it!"
She waited for the cheers to quiet before she continued. "And I'm thrilled to announce that I'm taking my clinical fellowship in a private school on the Main Line." In order to get her license, Harper needed to complete a nine-month clinical fellowship. While she was looking for her own place, Jack and Morgan had graciously offered up one of their guest rooms. The arrangement had been too good to pass up… and it kept her in Pennsylvania for quite a bit of time, which boded well for her new relationship.
Looking at the table that her siblings and cousins were seated at, she found Wyatt sitting between Jack and Michael. He grinned at her, pursing his lips in a type of kiss for her, and she beamed at him in return.
"This whole weekend, I was admittedly concerned with what I needed to do in order to make it to my hooding ceremony," Harper admitted. "Every fun event that we had, every wonderful dinner, this fabulous party… it wouldn't have been possible without my Uncle Kurt. He really has a gift for planning an amazing party, and the fact that he took his skills out of New York City and into Philadelphia only makes it that much more impressive."
Kurt was sitting front and center at the table containing Finn, Rachel, and the rest of the aunts and uncles. He was watching Harper give her speech with glassy eyes, an affectionate smile on his lips. In addition to his own children, he would do anything for his nieces and nephews. He knew that they were grateful, but hearing that gratitude acknowledge out loud was something else entirely.
"I wouldn't have been able to get here without my family," Harper said. "My Aunt Quinn and Uncle Puck introduced me to being a speech-language pathologist and pushed me to apply to the program. My Aunt Santana and Aunt Brittany helped me study for every exam. My parents supported me through the entire process, and held me up through the most difficult parts of my program. My cousins always gave me encouragement. My siblings put up with me no matter how difficult I got. And my Uncle Blaine and Uncle Kurt were there to make sure that I celebrated every milestone, no matter how small it was. And I'm so very grateful that they were able make this weekend one of the best I've ever experienced."
Kurt and Rachel were both crying know, but it was Kurt who jumped out of his chair and rushed towards Harper, wrapping her up into a tight hug. She hugged him back, feeling so lucky that she had him in her life.
"I don't know how to thank you for everything that you did this weekend, Uncle Kurt," Harper whispered.
Kurt knew exactly what she was getting at, and he pulled back far enough to grin at her through his tears. "You can thank me by letting me plan your wedding to Wyatt, of course."
Harper's cheeks flushed bright red, even as her heart skipped at beat at the thought of marrying Wyatt. "Sergeant McFancy Pants!"
eight.
Two years later, Kurt was putting the finishing touches on Harper and Wyatt's wedding reception.
Two years wasn't a terribly long time, but it was enough for things to change drastically. Leo had a baby with his fiancé, making Puck and Quinn grandparents. Jack and Morgan had added a son to their growing brood. Caroline had finally gotten a steady boyfriend. Michael had brought a boy home for Thanksgiving. The Phillies had won the World Series. Penelope and Aiden had eloped in a joint ceremony nine months ago that they had all been invited to, but the caveat had been that Sergeant McFancy Pants hadn't been allowed to make an appearance—besides wearing the shirt that had been created for Harper's graduation weekend.
In the early hours after the giant joint reception Kurt and Blaine had thrown for their children (honestly, they should have known better than to push their father), Wyatt had proposed to Harper, who had gleefully accepted. Kurt had started planning the wedding before the ring was even fully on her finger.
Unlike the graduation party, Harper and Wyatt were fully involved in the planning for their wedding. When Kurt had proposed an ice sculpture in the shape of the Liberty Bell, Harper and Wyatt had firmly but kind turned him down. Kurt had then put forth a fireworks show done in shades of red and white—which thankfully, were not the wedding colors. Harper loved the Phillies, and she knew she was marrying one of their players, but she could not stomach that color combination for her wedding. Thankfully, Wyatt had been in agreement.
Once the ceremony was over and Harper and Wyatt were standing up as man and wife, they both thanked Kurt for scheming to put Harper in a Wyatt Logan jersey at that game two years ago. He was wholly unapologetic as he got up to hug the newlyweds, crying the whole time.
At their table, Rachel nudged Finn. "So, what do you think is next?"
Finn groaned and tipped his head back. "Are you trying to tempt fate? We don't need to Kurt to one-up himself."
Rachel couldn't help the laughter that escaped her, and Finn eventually started laughing with her as well. No matter what changed over the years, they knew that they would have Kurt's shenanigans to love forward to.
Long live Sergeant McFancy Pants.
This is completely inspired by some of my own family shenanigans, and some of the stuff I've experienced over the years (yes, matching outfits have been involved. No, I will not elaborate further).
I hope that you've all loved reading about Sergeant McFancy Pants as much as I've loved writing about him.