"Look I found it, here!" Hermione said rushing over to Draco sat and pushed the book in his face. "Summer is practically over and there is bound to be a thunderstorm as the climate changes."

Draco quickly read the passages on the page and then glared up at her. "How exactly am I supposed to hold a mandrake leaf in my mouth for an entire mouth?"

"I suppose you just won't be able to run it as often." He gave her a playful smack on the bum and she laughed.

"I have many other things I'd rather use it for..." He tried to pull her into his lap.

"Come on, we have to at least try. Just imagine how much easier it will be if we can walk around property freely?"

"I already can walk around freely. I don't see why I have to do it," Draco snarked.

"It will give me more freedom and it will give you an advantage anytime you want to go somewhere unnoticed."

"No good. I adore attention."

"Draco," She said, almost whining.

"Hermione," he mocked, and her cheeks heated at the sound of him saying her name.

"Just think about it. No one will know you're an animagus. The potion takes so much time and attention there is no way someone would suspect you are brewing it with how often you are away."

"Granger, do you know how dangerous this is if not done a hundred percent correctly? Not to mention you can turn yourself into a mutant during training." He protested further.

"Of course, I do." She answered confidently.

He glanced at the book again and re-read the passages. "I'll need to do some more research. There should be more information in the library. We can go later tonight once the first floor has cleared."

Hermione was shocked. She had snuck into the library but had never touched any of the books.

"Cheat," he said before she had a chance to respond.

"What?" she asked, confused.

"That face you're making, you know I can't resist it," he said pulling the back of her legs so that she straddled him on the couch. "You never play fair."

Hermione deliberately walked past the library on her route through the first floor. She wanted to go inside and look through the row of books to get a head start but decided it'd be better if she waited to go in with Draco. He loved showing her his favorite parts of his home, and Hermione would hardly have to fake excitement.

After the incident between Lestrange and Flint, Hermione took it upon herself to continue coordinating distrust between members. She would grab items left out and move them near another group of people. Sneak notes and letters into robes with confusing messages. It amazed her how the death eaters just accepted the items or tried to conceal them once found on their person. It would only take a few conversations to clear any misunderstandings, but they never happened.

There were two reasons she began to avoid Draco and his friends. The first being that it started to feel wrong to invade their privacy. The second was that Astoria always found a way to snake herself next to Malfoy. Even worse, he entertained it. She would say something about their pending nuptials, and he would go along with the conversation. Hermione kept telling herself that it was just an act, but Draco had never discussed his relationship or intentions with Astoria.

She was listening in on Dolohov's progress with the Ministry but couldn't stop herself from glancing over to where the boys stood. Draco was debating something with Blaise while the others laughed. Astoria put her arm on Draco's to get his attention and he was still laughing at a comment Goyle made when he turned to address her. He whispered his reply, bending forward slightly so his cheek was close to hers.

Astoria batted his arm, which he then hung around her shoulders, pulling her into his side.

Hermione didn't want to see anymore but she couldn't pull her eyes away. Astoria stretched up, putting her chin on Draco's shoulder while she said something and pushed out her bottom lip. Hermione saw Draco swallow uncomfortably before snapping his head back to Goyle. Hermione exhaled. Now if only Astoria would back off, she could be freed from where she stood frozen and head upstairs.

She didn't.

Astoria inched her way close and placed a kiss on Draco's cheek. He turned his head slightly towards her, and Astoria brushed back his fringe before meeting him for a kiss. There were hoots and comments from around the group and Draco took the chance to step back, putting his hands in the air feigning innocence. There was more space between them now, but it was too late.

Hermione blindly weaved through the collection of Death Eaters until she reached the only sanctuary available to her. Once inside the suite, she threw the cloak off and gulped for air. Did she hold her breath the entire way back?

No, she was crying.

She didn't know how long their kiss was, it could have been seconds or hours. Time didn't stop it from replaying in her mind on a loop without reprieve. Astoria had everything! She was the most beautiful of all the pure-blood girls, Hermione knew that the first moment she saw her. She could have picked anyone she wanted, why did she have to take the one person Hermione wanted for herself?

She grabbed her coin and willed it to burn. She remembered Anthony downstairs and how she was going to speak with him. Maybe if she'd hurried, she could still catch him. But how could she explain her current state? How could she explain how much she let herself need Draco? How he became so important to her.

Hermione had let herself forget. She got so comfortable in the safety of her cage that she lost focus on what was important. In the letters Anthony passed to her, everyone had been so understanding. They told her to do whatever she needed to survive and get home. She thought that passing along information to the Order was enough to compensate for indulging in whatever this was between Draco and herself. Now that she couldn't ignore reality anymore, she knew it wasn't enough.

Astoria was Draco's fiancé. One day she would be his wife. And Hermione was nothing more than a dirty secret he kept hidden away.

Hermione went to the bathroom to put away her cloak and bag and downed half a vial of calming draught. Adding her to the wards shouldn't have taken so long. She should have been out ages ago. Hermione wanted to be back with the Order. Back to fighting against Death Eaters rather than being forced to live among them. To be tricked by them.

She laid down on the couch and muttered Accio and summoned a blanket to cover herself as she cried and drifted off to sleep. It had flown to her immediately for the first time since she started practicing wandless magic.

She didn't care.

Hermione felt a hand stroke her cheek. She turned to face the back of the couch to block out the light. She couldn't remember why, but she knew she didn't want to feel it.

"Granger," The room was dark now. The voice made her chest ache.

Hermione opened her eyes, and the room was cast in darkness. From the corner of her eye she could tell that Draco had taken the chair across from her. Hermione turned to lay on her back and groaned at the ache from laying in the same position for so long. The noise signaled to Draco that she was awake and suddenly he was crouched beside her.

"Overdid it again, my darling" he chided, gently tucking her hair behind her ear. She flinched at his touch. "It's only me."

Hermione had no words. None that she was allowed to say. She tried to turn her back on him, but he held her chin between his thumb and index finger. She could feel his breath as he got closer to her and she shoved him away before sitting up, suddenly wide awake. No fucking way she was going to let him kiss her.

"Sorry. I was only saying goodnight." He said with his hands held up and she nearly started crying again.

"Goodnight." She said shortly.

"Can I not kiss you?" He sounded slightly annoyed.

No. No you can't, she thought to herself, but kept her face stone. She noticed then that he was still in his clothes from that day. The ones his fiancés hands had been all over.

"You smell strange," she said coldly. He raised a brow at her and met her stare.

"I wanted to be sure you were alright; I didn't take time to shower. I hate when you take too much of the potion," He said unapologetically.

"No that's not it. Sweeter, floral." She couldn't actually smell it on him but Hermione knew the Gardenia scent of Astoria's perfume by now. He couldn't hide the shame on his face as he looked down and reached for her hand.

"I'm... around a lot of people during the day, Granger." He practically tripped over the words.

"This one more than others. You reek of it often." She put no effort into hiding her accusation. Draco was trying so hard to avoid the conversation he didn't even notice.

"I'll go clean up now. We should try to get more sleep." He tried to kiss her again, but she physically put her hand on his chest.

"Is that what you do with me? Wash me off you before you leave and it's like it never happened? Like I don't exist." She swallowed, trying to shove down her tears before they overtook her again.

"What? No!" He tried to reach for her, but she scrambled off the couch and put several feet between them.

"You know I am aware of who it is. I've heard Blaise tease you about her enough." Her pain had turned into anger, and it made the words easier.

"I don't want to talk about this now, it's the middle of the night. Let's just go to bed."

"Then go."

"Come here," he pleads.

"No."

She could tell he was getting frustrated. He ran a hand down his face before speaking again.

"I just want to kiss you. Just once and then we can talk over all this in the morning to your heart's content."

"You shouldn't be kissing people other than your fiancé. Or is it because of my blood status that I don't count?" It hurt her to say it, but it was worth seeing his exterior finally crack.

"For fuck's sake. Astoria's and I don't even have an official contract drawn yet. Besides, marriage is a normal requirement of life, Granger. We all know that. Even muggles have similar expectations!" He turned away from her and it was pain all over again. He was going to marry her. It hurt so much more to hear him say it.

"Why her?" she blurted out. He shook his head, facing the fireplace.

"Why not? My mother preferred her or Daphne." He turned to her, and he had the audacity to be angry himself. "Who else? If there is someone you think from all your interactions with the eligible sacred twenty-eight that is a better fit, please. Enlighten me."

"Fuck you!" She hissed.

"No really! You want to judge me, Granger? Let's talk about you. The second you leave here you'll be married off to a Weasley and I'll never see you again!" He walked to the window, rage fueling every step. "This place that you are so desperate to escape from. My vaults and estates that you've always resented me for. My prestigious position in the Dark Lord's ranks. This is what I have to offer my wife. Wealth and a bloody ledger. It'll never be enough for you!"

The words hung between them. Hermione refused to feel sorry for him.

"You would never choose me." He stabbed again.

"You chose her before I even arrived. And continued to do so since I've been here."

He shook his head and turned to fire at her again, but she didn't want to hear anymore. She beelined straight for the door and walked into the hall.

Her feet didn't make a sound, but Malfoy storming behind her started to rouse the portraits. If they were anything like Grimmauld place, they would start wailing at her once they woke. She darted into a guest suite and locked the door behind her. It only took Malfoy a few seconds to unlock the door before he barged in, waking the portrait on the wall. The man looked around the room for the disturbance before his eyes fell on Hermione.

"Filthy mudblood! You dare pervert the great Malfoy house! Get her to the dungeon-"

"Silencio," Hermione barked at the portrait and the pudgy blonde man fell silent. Draco cleared him from the frame and then silenced the room.

"What the fuck?!" He yelled the moment it was in place.

"Get out."

"Granger, this is stupid. Just come back to the room-"

"Am I your prisoner?" Tears fell freely down her face.

"No."

"Then. Get. Out."

He looked so desperate, afraid to say anything and make it worse. He nodded subtly and then began to cast protective enchantments and Hermione walked into the bathroom to hide until he was finished. When she heard him leave, she walked over to the bed. Overcome with grief, flung herself upon the mattress and broke down; curling into a ball as she sobbed.

They had ignored the truth. Once Hermione left, she wouldn't see Draco again. She told herself that she would just be missing this place, but she knew that was just a part of what she'd be leaving behind. Even if Draco was a turncoat, it would be too risky for them to see each other once she was back with the Order. They wouldn't be able to be around each other until the war was over. If they both survived.

She had left in such a hurry that she didn't have her coin or her letters to sooth her. She felt so alone. So helpless. Even with a house full of people, Draco was the only person she could speak to. There was Anthony occasionally, and-

"Neddy!" she choked out, gasping through tears and Neddy popped in a second later. She looked so worried. She must have already met with Draco since their fight.

"Evening mistress," Neddy whispered to her gently.

She pulled herself on the bed next to Hermione and started to braid her hair so it would not stick to the tears on her face.

The next morning, she had Neddy take her into the suite so that she could grab some clothes and her beaded bag after Draco had already left. The portrait stayed empty throughout the days, which was fortunate because Hermione couldn't find the will to venture out of the room. She read a bit from her book, but mostly just looked at the cover. Remembering how special she felt when Draco gave it to her.

She couldn't make up her mind. She was either an ungrateful guest or being made a fool.

The only time she left her new room was to check in with Anthony so that he wouldn't worry, passing him a note saying that she wasn't feeling well but should have more to pass on soon.

A week after their fight, Hermione found herself unable to sleep. Not wanting to bother Neddy in the dead of night for something so trivial, she swung on the cloak and silently made her way into Draco's study. Maneuvering on tip toes to the bookshelves, she unwound the cloak from her body and draped it over the piano. She tucked the books under her arm and turned to leave when she saw him, asleep on the couch wrapped in her usual blanket. She was only going to look at him for a moment. His eyes looked tired and darkened, and an empty bottle of whiskey laid on the coffee table. She grabbed the bottle to stand it up, and the small noise startled him awake.

He sat up quickly and could only meet her eyes for a second before looking away. He moved and put his feet on the floor and then covered his face with his hands. Her chest started to ache. It'd be worth making a fool of herself if Draco never had to look this way again.

She tentatively reached her hand out and pushed her fingers through his hair. He exhaled with relief and instantly wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him. Draco pressed his face to her stomach and took a long, shaky breath. He nudged her shirt up and started kissing and nipping at her stomach and hips. Not too hard, just enough to make her flinch slightly in response.

She pushed his shoulders with both her hands to lay him back down on the cushions but the grasp he had on her hips was firm and she found herself following his lead. She tucked one of her legs between his and kissed him up his neck and along his jaw. With one hand he tilted her chin up and kissed her desperately on the mouth. His other arm was tight around her, and he peppered her lips and cheeks with kisses until she fell asleep.

In the morning they didn't discuss their fight again, just indulged in each other. Draco followed her everywhere. He rubbed her shoulders while she brushed her teeth. Waited for her to exit the bathroom after she took a shower. He pulled her on his lap so they could share breakfast together. Of all the things Draco had listed to provide a wife, he never mentioned himself. Maybe she could keep him after all.

Hermione groaned in discomfort as the wards indicated the approach of someone to their room and Draco tightened his hold around her.

"Shouldn't you at least check who it is?" She said taking a bite.

"It doesn't matter."

Dread overcame her when she reached the first floor and realized Voldemort was occupying his seat in the drawing room. Hermione tapped Anthony's shoulder once, which let him know she was there but did not have any news. She had missed so much the past week, she didn't know who called the meeting today or why.

"Cyrus," Voldemort began, not bothering to hide his annoyance. "It is not obvious, why you requested my attendance today. Have our initiatives not been met?"

"All have been very successful, my Lord. I am sure Lucius has told you of the outstanding success in Spain," Cyrus Greengrass replied.

Spain was a mission Theo and Goyle were leading. Anthony had promised to spare their old Slytherin classmates from any ambush by the Order, making it one of the more successful missions to date.

"Indeed he has," Voldemort replied coolly, "It again begs the question; Why are we here?" A heavy weight seemed to descend upon all in attendance.

"Y-Yes, my Lord. We were thinking with the ongoing success, that perhaps a celebration of sorts would be a good strategic move. Improve morale for the members while showcasing what the world can look forward to under your reign." Cyrus looked at his leader, trying to gage his response but was met with a malicious sneer.

"And what would these celebrations be in honor of?" He asked finally.

"It could be anything. Successful missions, seasons, holidays. The theme would just be the framework in which to honor your good name." Parkinson jumped in.

"A wedding perhaps," Cyrus threw out. Astoria adjusted her posture.

Fuck off, Greengrass.

"This again? Is young Malfoy prepared to fulfill a betrothal contract on such short notice?"

Voldemort remarked, as if he was finally considering the idea. Lucius nodded and looked like he

was about to speak.

"I have no interest in pursuing traditional obligations, my Lord. I have pledged all that I have and all that I am to serve you in making your masterful vision a reality." Draco cut in before his father had the chance to say anything.

"And serve me, you have," Voldemort nodded his approval towards Draco. "You can have your holiday celebrations, Cyrus. Besure they do not conflict with anything of importance. There will be no betrothals until I declare otherwise. We can hardly have our female members going into battle with swollen bellies." He said with darkened eyes, "I have had enough experience with children interfering with my movement. I do not care to invite the occasion to happen again."

"Very well, my Lord. Perhaps a few more months..."

"Our movement will take more than a few months, Cyrus. Astoria has plenty of suitors vying for her attention. Work out your contracts with one of them. I am tired of batting your hand away from my estate," Draco barked at Astoria's father. Lucius looked between his friend and his son; it was clear he did not know how to address the sudden change in agreement.

"You do well to take after young mister Malfoy," Voldemort gestured to the newer members around the room. "Carnal pleasures are for the weakest of men. If we subject ourselves to them, we are no better than the muggles."

Cyrus nodded with his jaw clenched. She felt zero pity for him. He chose his leader, he could live with the consequences.

They decided on a Yuletide ball for their next event and the meeting was adjourned. Astoria was entrusted to coordinate the event and guestlist. It was unnerving how many well-known people in the magical community were now open to the idea of socializing with the Death Eaters.

"Nice robes Nott," Draco snickered as he approached his friend.

"Speaking to us again, are you? You've got to be the moodiest git I've ever been friends with,"

Theo snapped back, "And these are from the finest seamstress in Spain. It's not my fault you lack creativity in your wardrobe."

"Harsh. I only meant that you were out of uniform," Draco defended, unconsciously smoothing out his own robes.

"Well I think you look dashing, Theo," Goyle teased and Draco laughed. "Trying to find a bride for yourself? A highly sought after one just became available."

"Nah, right on you Malfoy. The less people involved in our stupidity, the better," Theo responded sorrowfully.

"Speak for yourself. Marietta and I are getting married as soon as the Dark Lord allows," Goyle said.

"And we will all give toasts to the merger of your great houses."

"Where's Blaise?" Draco asked.

"Mission with Lestrange. Mental case. Can't be trusted to do anything alone anymore," Theo answered bitterly. "He'll be pissed about you dropping Tori."

"Blaise is always pissed at me for some reason or another," Draco scoffed.

Hermione soon left them behind and made it back upstairs. She waited for Draco as long as she could before succumbing to her hunger and eating the meal Neddy sent up for her. She jumped when, in the middle of her meal, he walked in from the bedroom. Draco saw her nervous movements and hesitated to approach her. Hermione went to him instead, not willing to risk insecurity coming between them again.

Suddenly, Draco had her pinned against the wall. She clung to him, not able to get their bodies close enough. He met her movements perfectly, his hands and mouth found all the places he had learned as he studied her the last several weeks.

His thickness strained against his trousers as he pushed against her. The thin materials of her shorts did little to separate them, and she was moving with him as a familiar feeling started to build within her. He pulled the collar of her t-shirt the side access more of her skin, and she rolled her hips into him to chase a feeling that was just out of reach. It was so close, she just needed a little-

"More," she breathed.

It took her a moment to notice that he had gone still. His head resting on her shoulder as he looked between them. Watching her writhe with need. She stopped her movements, forcing him to look up. His eyes were flamed. His cheeks were flushed, and his lips were swollen. She wanted to remember him that way forever.

"I want to touch you," he rasped as he gazed into her eyes, then let them rove over her body. "Yes," she whispered back, and he wet his lip while his fingers traced down the front of her

shirt. "Anywhere"

His eyes snapped back to hers and he didn't waste another moment before sliding his hand in the front of her shorts. She moaned and closed her eyes at his captivating touch. This was it. This was what she wanted. What she desired. She always enjoyed any attention he gave but nothing they had done so far came close to the feeling of his hand directly on her.

She pulled him into a kiss, but it only lasted a few moments before he broke it to watch her again. She should have been embarrassed. Ashamed. The undignified way she whined and moved against him. But all she felt was that she was on the verge of something wonderful, and Draco was the one bringing her there.

She threw her head back against the wall when the pleasure finally overtook her. Draco's mouth was on hers, drinking her moans and exhales as he slowed his hand. When Hermione's pulse started to slow, she looked at him for reassurance. He met her with more affection than she knew she deserved. Draco rested his forehead against hers while he tried to get his own breathing under control.

"Don't leave me, Hermione."

The plea sounded like a secret. She wanted so much to keep it for him.