Forest For the Leaves
Warning: This story is M-rated for a reason, it contains adult themes, graphic content, major character death, and coarse language.
Disclaimer: I never really understood the point of disclaimers on a website dedicated to fan fiction aside from a meaningless gesture to cover all your bases, until I came across people on this site begging for money for a property they don't own. As such, here is a reminder that Naruto was created by Masashi Kishimoto and licensed by Viz Media here in North America. I am making no monetary gain from this and this is not meant to be a replacement for the original work but additive fan material.
This is a re-write, I re-wrote a lot of Naruto's scenes in this chapter, added some, etc.
Note: I apologize if I made it seem as if this story was something it isn't. This isn't an abandonment fic. Yes, Naruto will be dealing with the fallout of neglect and struggle with his choices as to whether or not to leave the village at various points throughout it, and some beloved characters doing things they ought to be punished for, but if you're reading this expecting a nihilistic Naruto who hates the world, doling out revenge to the people who wronged him. This isn't it. Not that I have a problem with those types of stories, but this is simply not my vision for this one. If you have problems with the underlying themes of Naruto, take 'em up with Kishimoto.
Chapter 1 – Enter: Heirs of the Leaf
Nawaki Senju
The name was carved into the stone that lay above the boy himself. Or at least, that's who was thought to be lying in the grave. Nawaki's body had been horribly burned by the explosion that took his life, his face so mutilated beyond recognition, that he'd only been identified by the necklace he wore around his neck. A gift from his sister, a family heirloom.
It had been Nawaki's sensei, Orochimaru who had broken the news and returned the necklace to her. Orochimaru, the notorious traitor who had garnered quite the reputation for kidnapping and experimenting on children. Though no one, not even Tsunade Senju who had been the boy's sister, and the snake's teammate believed he had lied about Nawaki's demise. Yet it was enough for one lonely young boy to daydream about a long-lost kinsman returning to the village and looking after him.
As was his familial duty, he wiped the dead leaves and twigs off his gravesite.
"Nawaki Senju?" a tiny orange toad asked aloud, atop his perch on the young boy's head, buried in his messy, pale blonde hair. "He related to you Naruto?"
"He was-" Naruto stopped for a moment. 'Was', wasn't the right word. Nawaki had died, long before he'd been born, they'd never been alive at the same time. There was no previous relationship that necessitated the use of past tense. Tilting his head enough so that he could look at the amphibian, he answered, "He is my uncle."
Said toad nodded his hea... whole body at him, as Naruto took in his surroundings. He saw what remained of his family. Rotten bones in boxes beneath slabs of stone littered the village cemetery. The Senju vajra, the clan's diamond & thunderbolt, was surpassed only by the Konoha leaf in number of gravemarkers. The once-great Senju clan, was now not so much a clan, as it was one boy left alone in a graveyard wondering if his mother would ever return.
The Senju had loved their village, and seemingly to a man – they had died for it. The Three Great Ninja Wars had filled the cemetery with Senju headstones, and those who survived those conflicts wouldn't prove to be any luckier outside of them. Not far from Nawaki's grave, were the graves' of his grandparents, and a dozen cousins laid between them. There was an entire row of Senjus who had volunteered to be a part of the trials conducted in order to recreate the First Hokage's kekkai genkai, and then another for the ones who had died defending the research. A small black pillar, commemorated all of the children with grandfather's genetic material that had been killed in Orochimaru's attempts.
Beneath the 'Will of Fire' monument, his great-grandfather and great uncle had been given hero's burials and laid to rest in mausoleums of stone, as befitting their status as Hokage. Never mind the fact that Hashirama had died of old age before he turned forty due to his healing ability shortening his lifespan, and Tobirama's body having never been recovered and was probably dumped in some ditch in the middle of nowhere.
The Senju had given everything to the village. Their reward? Lots of space in the cemetery.
Naruto wondered how many of them died for the glory of a clan that would soon be forgotten? How many to feed families that had vanished? How many to make the world a better place as it went on without them?
Why did they have to die and leave him all alone?
He was the last Senju in the village. The closest thing he had to family here were the headstones and the great stone faces.
He'd be better off as a rock.
The thought saddened him greatly, and he lowered his head, and re-read the words etched beneath his uncle's name.
Beloved teammate, student, and brother
Naruto thought it was as fine an epitaph as could be hoped for from a twelve-year-old boy. With the first word alone, it proved that he had outdone Naruto at least, and even that was before considering the living boy's lack of a team, a teacher, or siblings.
'It's better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.' Naruto did not think that was what was meant by that saying, but it did make him wonder. Was it better to be a beloved corpse, or alive and unloved?
Naruto thought about it for a while, and a while longer still...
When no answer presented itself after an hour of arduous thought, Naruto pulled a kunai from his belt and began to cut into granite with the steel.
"Ahh, Naruto, whatcha doing there?" the toad asked him hesitantly. Worry.
"Carving."
"Well, I guess I better be getting back to Mount Myoboku... before my old man has my warts, yeah." the toad explained awkwardly, and Naruto could tell easily that his custodial summons was trying to get away from him. Whether it was from wanting nothing to do with 'desecrating' a grave, or not wanting to be around him anymore, was something beyond him.
"Goodbye, Gamakichi." was his only farewell.
Flashing a hurried peace sign, the toad then vanished in a puff of smoke, returning back home to the legendary Land of Toads.
While carrying out his business, Naruto gave the absent toad some more thought. They'd known each other since Gamakichi was a tadpole, and he had nothing against the creature, but he could tell that Bunta's spawn thought he was weird. To this day, Naruto maintained the impression that the Toads were still upset over his insistence that toads were still frogs even if they do tend to have rougher skin and live in drier habitats.
The Toad Summons were basically babysitters that he had inherited from his father. It seemed the man had no intention of sticking around to raise him, so he had smeared some of Naruto's blood on a scroll, gotten his infant son to scribble his name, then convinced the Toad Boss to accept him as his summoner. And ever since, the Toads were always checking up on him whether he wanted them around or not. Naruto was usually glad to have the company, but the Toads weren't picky about who they sent. He wouldn't wish an afternoon with Gamariki on his worst enemy.
After a great deal of effort, Naruto had finally finished his addition to Nawaki's epitaph, which now read:
Beloved teammate, student, and brother and uncle.
There was little time to admire his work, soon he sensed the arrival of the day's genin team who had been assigned to tend the cemetery. Not wanting to stick around and get into a confrontation with them for defacing a gravestone, he was quick to take his leave.
As he made his way back to the village proper, he began to feel anxious. Naruto was wary of the villagers, because for whatever reason, to say they were wary of him was putting it mildly. So, he put the hood up on his jacket, kept his head down, and hoped he would pass by unnoticed.
He felt the exact moment when he was within fifty-four meters of the village proper. He was certain of the figure because that was his limit. If he concentrated and reached out, he could feel it from much further away, but within that distance, there was no way to stop it. As soon as he crossed that threshold, the feeling hit him. The welling up in his gut, the clenching of his chest, the tingle in his fingers, the pressure pooling behind his eyes, the dull pain in the back of his head.
For as long as he could remember, it had been like this. Naruto would sense the smallest unpleasant vibe to the most terrible states of mind. In a perfect world, this wouldn't have made a difference, but in a hidden village, where most of the population dislikes you – it was hell.
Years of meditation and study had helped him to an extent, made it tolerable, but no matter how hard he tried, it could never be ignored. At least within a hundred paces of someone in a bad mood.
Naruto didn't know why people despised him so much, he only knew that they did, to a certainty. He had his suspicions that it had to do with his parents being gone, but that was as far as that idea had gotten him. He'd asked the Hokage, a few times actually, to no avail. All he had learned from him, was that the old man became deeply upset and guilty at the mere mention of it.
When he passed the first building into the village, it was simple enough to deal with. 'Just focus on your breathing, the dirt crunching beneath your feet, the sound of footsteps, the air pushing back against your face as you walk against the wind.'
Realizing he was having some success, he was proud of himself, the negative emotions seemed to be coming in only as white noise, which to someone who was used to roaring screams, it was quite a relief.
The Hokage had advised him that it might be better for him to try to control his 'ability' by repeated usage rather than running away from it and becoming a slave to its effects. Naruto was afraid that in this case, practice might 'strengthen' his sensing and make the symptoms worse. But there was a part of him, that was so desperate to be free from it, to be able to live some sort of normal life, that he had resolved to try to make it better.
Eventually, he felt comfortable enough to look up and tried to focus his senses on specific people.
Reaching out, he found the usual. Most people are just sort of bored as they're walking around. One bored person at a time was actually kind of peaceful for him to sense but lost adrift in a sea of it and it would quickly make anyone depressed. Maybe some of them were excited at the idea of reaching their destination, but if they were, he didn't know it... he only sensed their negative emotions.
His eyes first landed on a purple-haired lady dressed in a trench coat shouting loudly, and dare he say scandalized at the man working behind the counter at the closest dumpling shop, "No red bean paste! No soy sauce! What kind of place are you running here?" She had grabbed the man by the collar, pulled him over the counter, and was holding a skewer to his throat, all with a menacing look in her eyes. Naruto scurried along quickly deciding that the crazy lady was probably not the best test subject.
Dissatisfaction. Regardless of his intent to skip her, he sensed her all the same. While he was confused at this particular case, he was sure that it was indeed that exact emotion. He had read loads of books on emotions, putting names to the negative sensations had done wonders in terms of categorizing, compartmentalizing, and then trying to repress them.
'She must either really like dumplings, or she needs to work on her conflict resolution skills.'
The next unique emotion came from a young couple arguing as they walked down the street, the man was feeling slightly guilty, but mostly abashed, while the woman was furious, and even more jealous. He wondered why they felt like that and soon found out the answer as they passed by him and he overheard her complaining about him always paying particular attention to the ninja tool holsters of her fellow kunoichi.
For a moment, Naruto felt as if he was invading people's privacy, but put it aside when he came to the realization that they were technically invading his privacy and he was simply gathering reconnaissance so that he might better defend himself.
The man dragged his partner into the Yamanaka Flower Shop and bought all of their hyacinth, which seemed to work in quelling her fury as he couldn't sense anything from her anymore, soon after that, nothing from him either. He made sure to make note of this for future reference.
In their place, his attention was drawn to an older lady, buying a bouquet of lilies. Grief. Naruto wondered who she'd lost, a friend? A spouse? A parent? He wouldn't know, he'd never been close enough to anyone to feel something like loss, he supposed that was a plus. However, he could tell the loss was dearly felt, but a great deal of time had passed since.
"Come one, come all!" A loud booming voice took him out of his thoughts, and he was drawn to a street vendor plying his trade. Greed. It was practically oozing off the man. Naruto decided to make his way over, and sat down across the street from him to watch as things unfolded. For some reason, the salesman seemed to be invoking all kinds of negative emotions from the crowd.
"I have the honour of bringing you fine people, fresh from the World Tree in the Takigakure, genuine, 100% authentic Hero Water!" The man produced a glass bottle filled with what looked like muddy waste.
"Guaranteed to increase your power tenfold!", the man-made a bold claim, and Naruto felt a spike of contempt come from the older ninja watching, and he decided to move along before they attempted to put an end to the display themselves.
Disappointment. He spun his head around to see a genin squad leaving the barbecue restaurant, all three of them looking downtrodden. However, this feeling too soon disappeared as Naruto heard their Jounin-sensei explain his genin team had failed the chūnin exams three times before they passed, and that the trio would do better next time.
He really should have known better to focus on the worried-looking woman, desperately scanning the streets. But it was hard not to, the woman had long red hair, a shade of which he'd never seen before in real life, and couldn't help but stare. A booming headache emerged in the back of his skull followed by her cries "Uzume!", the beautiful lady shouted, "Uzume, where did you go?!" Naruto froze in place, having to clutch his head to try and soothe the agony. Panic. Unfortunately, Naruto could also sense the extent of negative emotions, yet afflicted as he was by the magnitude of the woman's panic, he could not examine the cause, having to concentrate on breathing as the emotion threatened to strangle his growing lungs, that is until a blond-haired girl came running towards the woman.
"I'm right here, Kaa-chan!" the girl laughed before she was snatched into an embrace, and the pain disappeared in a flash, leaving Naruto to get a hold of himself. Though relieved by the reunion and the end of his headache, he was soon disconcerted at the sight before him.
'Uzume' was a name he recognized, as did many of the other pedestrians walking around the village as they soon swarmed the young girl, crowding around her, singing her praises, and offering them the first choice of their wares. Uzume Namikaze was the daughter of the late Fourth Hokage, Konoha's favourite son, who had sacrificed himself to kill a demon in order to protect the village. The man was a hero to many – Naruto had never met him though.
In place of the man himself, their praise and adulation had fallen to his daughter, who'd tragically never met her father due to his untimely demise. Young as she was, people already whispered that the Hokage was holding out for her to become his successor. 'The Hero's Daughter' was an integral part of the village. Everybody loved her.
Yet, even to someone as unused to such feelings, it was plain to see that Uzume's mother loved her most of all.
Envy.
Naruto did not have to search the crowd to find the source of that feeling.
Dropping his head, he decided to abandon the exercise for the day and started shuffling his feet slowly through the dusty walkways toward his house. There was no escaping his own emotions. They made themselves known no matter what and were worse than anything else he could sense from others. Naruto would gladly feel a thousand headaches to be rid of them.
If only he could experience their positive emotions too...
If he could feel the woman's satisfaction in the face of a plate of dumplings with red bean paste, if he could sense the affection the couple had for one another, if he could understand the cherished memories that caused one to mourn a loss, if he could experience the hope a miracle cure could bring, if he could know what it felt like to feel trust and camaraderie like that genin team, if he could feel the respect of those around him... if he could feel a mother's love. Maybe he could be happy too.
Despondency. There was no point in dreaming of the impossible. So, he kept shuffling his feet forward, doing his best to confine his senses to himself.
Unfortunately, it's hard to see where you're going when you lock yourself up like that.
"Hey, watch it kid." Annoyance. The feeling washed over him like a tidal wave, and for a moment Naruto felt like he was drowning in it. Physical contact amplified the stimulus beyond just being noticed, his brain felt like it had skirted too close to fire and been singed.
Trying to catch his breath, he had to tilt his head back to look at the man, and in doing so his hood fell back, allowing for his face to come into view.
"S-s-sorry, sir." A nervous boy stuttered out, trying to be polite, and mindful that he hadn't been paying attention to what was in front of him.
Yet the man's face twisted in recognition at the sight of his exposed face, and recoiled away from him. "Get Lost." The man spat at him, before stomping off. Aggravation.
Naruto nodded his head meekly, then put one in front of the other, and quietly began moving.
A boy standing barely three feet tall, made for a less than imposing sight, but the people in front of him parted all the same, moving off to the side, giving him a wide berth in the streets. The whispers followed in his wake. He couldn't hear their words, but he felt their meaning. Despite how hard Naruto tried to blot them out, as flustered as he was now, there was no escape.
"There's that boy." Alarm.
"I can't believe the Hokage just lets him walk around the village like that." Dismay.
Fury. It came so strongly that Naruto had to look, only to find it originating from the crimson-haired lady from earlier. Her face was scrunched up in a horrible glare, the hair on her head had even begun to rise, her eyes started to glow. Terrified that she was going to attack him, Naruto sped up, missing the curious glance of her daughter. As he moved on, he might have felt a surge of helplessness take the fury's place from the woman, but barely noticed in the face of the upcoming dread.
"Is anyone keeping an eye on him?", a startled woman asked checking the rooftops for any signs of ninja, "What if he's up to something?" Distress.
"I can't even see it walking around without seeing my boys' names on the memorial stone." Resentment.
"It's no wonder Lady Tsunade left the village." Disgust.
"To think the Senju have fallen so low." Revulsion.
"Lord First must be rolling over in his grave." Loathing.
"Rumour has it," one gossip said in a hushed tone to another "He sent the Fourth to an early grave of his own." Outrage.
"Someone should really do something about it." Anger.
"It'd be no less than what that freak deserves." Hatred.
Naruto could stand it no longer, his composure slipped from his face and the tears begin to trail down his face. He broke into a sprint, willing his legs to move as fast as they could to escape, racing against the voices on the way to his house, away from them all.
Misery.
Naruto made good time, yet it had felt like ages in his current state. Soon finding himself in front of a large mansion on the outskirts of the village, surrounded by a lush forest that over the decades had grown enough to hide the once prominent estate. Having arrived at his residence, he burst through the door, slammed it shut behind him, and collapsed to his knees in agony as the strain of running home and the stress of the village took a toll on his heart.
'Deep breathes! In through the nose, out through the mouth!' Naruto was having trouble calming himself down, 'Relax! You have to relax!'
Despite his efforts, seeing stars appear in the blackness that was consuming his vision, Naruto knew he had failed to relax, then fell face-first into the floor.
"How is he?" Naruto heard an unfamiliar voice ask, "Does he need to be taken to the hospital?"
"No," another stranger answered, "it's just another panic attack."
Cracking his eyes apart, he made out two blurry figures in masks. One was standing over him, while the other was crouched down beside him, having grabbed his hand to check his pulse and using medical ninjutsu to look him over. The physical contact let him feel exactly what the Anbu was feeling – boredom.
"Any signs of concussion?" Naruto wondered that himself
"Negative." and Naruto considered himself much more relieved than the man who'd asked.
The upright Anbu nodded his head, and while Naruto was trying to interpret whether he was nodding to him or to signal that he had heard his colleague, the two of them seemed to make 'eye contact' but given the Anbu was wearing a crow's mask he couldn't be sure, yet the eye slits of said mask seemed to be on the same plane as his eyes.
'You're okay. You have to to stop letting the villagers affect you like this. Emotions can't hurt you.' Naruto thought... He thought... What? Nothing.
Resignation. Pity. Remorse.
Blinking his eyes a few times to try to sharpen his vision, and shaking the cobwebs out of his head, Naruto tried to make sense of those feelings from the Anbu. 'That was weird.'
The Anbu were usually just incredibly bored. They'd never felt like that around him before.
One of the first things he had ever asked the Hokage: "Who are these people in my house?"
At the time, the Hokage had only told him that they were friends of his who were keeping an eye on him while his parents were away. But Naruto had learned much more since, they were members of Konoha's Special Assassination and Tactical Squad, the Anbu Black Ops. Elite ninja that answered directly to the Hokage.
Naruto still wasn't sure why he needed Anbu to watch him. He supposed that it had something to do with his status as the last Senju in the village.
But they'd never taken an interest beyond that.
"Are you alright?" the crow-masked Anbu asked.
Naruto nodded his head slowly, and before his chin could come back up, both of them had disappeared in a swirl of leaves.
Lying alone now on the floor, Naruto sensed the Anbu return to their original positions. The medic had resumed feeling bored, while the other was feeling so many negative emotions, that Naruto struggled to make sense of them. But thankfully they were far enough away that Naruto could ignore them, which was good because the ferocious rumbling in his stomach soon demanded his attention.
Standing up, he made sure his legs were stable beneath him before walking into the kitchen.
Now that it was time to eat, he went to the refrigerator, gathered the ingredients and began to prepare his dinner. Naruto was neither a particularly talented cook nor someone who appreciated food for the taste but he was a growing boy, and one who seemed dead-set on growing very much indeed. Naruto's breakfast usually consisted of a dozen eggs, three oranges, a carton of milk and a loaf of bread. Lunch wasn't so much a dedicated meal, but whatever berries and fruit he could come across in the forest on his way fishing, bolstered by pockets full of almonds.
But for dinner...
The ingredients often differed, but the dish never did. He'd discovered what sumo wrestlers ate, and decided that seemed like the best option. Every night, for years, he ate chankonabe. Gorged on it, was more appropriate. Naruto ate so much that it made trips into the village a daily necessity, even if dealing with the local vendors and fish-mongers was a horrible chore, but even so, there was not enough time in the day for Naruto to find all of his own food in the forest.
One good thing came from being a Senju at least, he never had to worry about going hungry. Absent though his parents were, they had not left him penniless.
Deciding to treat himself for a trying day, he made his favourite by rolling his fresh fish into balls and fried them in soybean oil, then chopped up some mushrooms while the broth was cooking.
After scarfing down an entire pot of the stew, Naruto retired to the mansion's study, where he could spend the rest of the day reading some of the scrolls piled up on the shelves in there.
He grabbed one of Tobirama's scrolls, and began to immerse himself in the basics of one his preliminary theories on his Teleportation jutsu. The only other thing Naruto enjoyed about being a Senju was being able to read about all the secret techniques of his ancestors, and he especially enjoyed all the little notes Lady Mito had left all over the pages, chastising Lord Second about how he would have disintegrated his body into a billion pieces and flung them into the void if not for her ingenious seal that would act as an anchor to compile all his parts at the same place, and in the same state they left in.
Not having studied the subject before, Naruto couldn't make heads or tails of Lord Second's notes, but he did enjoy the familiarity he found in Lady Mito's formulas, but more so in her good-natured hazing.
The chance to learn something from his ancestors if even from their notes was very appealing to him. So, with new inspiration, Naruto ran off to the library to find a book on fuinjutsu so that he could start to understand Lady Mito's formulas.
On his way to the library, Naruto noticed a large slug with familiar colouring had appeared on the floor, and his heart skipped a beat. He immediately stopped what he was doing, and ran to it.
The slug bowed its antennae to him, "Greetings, Lord Naruto."
"Hello, Lady Katsuyu," he bowed swiftly, "Do you have news from Kaa-san?" he asked in eager anticipation.
The boss of the slug summons nodded, kinda, and dissolved around a box, "Lady Tsunade sends this, with all her love."
Naruto wasted no time in snatching it, ignoring its slimy coating, and ran off to bring all of his letters he had been writing since the last time his mother had sent a package.
Lady Katsuyu took them graciously, and he thanked her profusely, before he climbed up onto the roof, to open it as the sun went down.
Inside the box was a grass-green haori with the Senju clan symbol embroidered on the back, and a letter addressed to him from his mother. Naruto threw on the haori with a beaming smile, ignoring that it was easily a size too small for him.
Naruto had never met his mother, not really. Of course, she had given birth to him, and she'd apparently taken care of him when he was a baby. But by the time he was old enough to remember things, she had gone somewhere else. Despite this, Naruto adored her. Having heard so many incredible stories about her from the Hokage, and reading all about her in books. She was Tsunade Senju, the First Hokage's granddaughter, the Second's niece, the Third's student. One of the legendary Sanin, the world's foremost medical-nin, and easily its greatest kunoichi. Renowned both for her unworldly beauty and ungodly strength. She was someone who'd changed the face of the Elemental Nations, both figuratively and literally. A hero of the Second Shinobi World War, the Slug Princess, and the inheritor of the Senju's Will of Fire.
Letters from her, were beyond precious to him.
He wasn't entirely sure why she'd left, but Naruto had no doubt that it was for a good reason, so he anxiously awaited her return.
He tore open the envelope, unfolded the paper, cast a hopeful gaze on the hastily scratched words rife with spelling mistakes and long tangents about an inn-keeper she didn't care for, before he began to cry tears of joy. She had made him a promise.
She'd had enough of traveling, the situation among the Elemental Nations seemed to have finally stabilized after the Kyuubi attack, she'd given up on trying to track down Jiraiya (his lecherous, perverted, scoundrel of a father), Shizune had learned more than any other medic-nin in the village from her already, and most importantly of all, she missed him dearly.
His mother promised that she was coming home. Within the week, they would be together again, as a family.
All the hurt in the world would not have wiped the grin from his face. As the sun set on Konohagakure, a young boy sitting alone on a rooftop was for the first time in his life, truly happy.
Uchiha Compound
"I'm home." The words echoed throughout the house, and Satsuki popped up from the floor, quickly abandoned her colouring book to barrel towards the door at the sound of her older brothers' voice.
"Itachi-nii! You're home!" She cried out in joy as she collided into his back, and clutched onto his shirt with her tiny hands, as he took off his shoes.
"Uh-huh." Itachi grunted as he patted his little sister on her head, before making his way down the hall to the kitchen where he suspected his mother would be this time of day.
"Tired, Nii-san?" Satsuki inquired, as she chased after him, leaping gleefully in an attempt to match his longer strides.
They found their mother preparing dinner, and she too greeted her son by bending down and giving the still quite young boy a kiss on his cheek, and smiled at the two of them together. "You know, from the moment you leave the house, Satsuki's waiting for you to come home."
"Hmph," Satsuki huffed in embarrassment at her mother's story, and held her breath, how couldn't she be excited by Itachi coming home, when he's been gone all day!
The air welled up behind her cheeks was soon expelled when a bashful Itachi gave her another pat on the hand, and all embarrassment was immediately forgotten in favour of spending time with her brother.
"I want to go on missions too!" She loudly declared, it was so boring around the house with Itachi gone, and she was certain that ninja missions were better than Itachi let on.
Her older brother laughed as he again set out walking towards their father's room, "It's still too early for you yet, you'll have plenty of missions in a few years."
Satsuki groaned at her brother's remarks, she was already four! Itachi was twice her age, she'd have to live her whole life again before she could go on missions. Nonetheless, she followed her brother.
Itachi had made it to their father's room, soon enough before her that they were already in the middle of a conversation, so by the time she could make out what they were saying, they were about done.
"Th-thank you, sir..." Her brother thanked her father. The look of relief on his face was plain to see, which was rare for the boy, and it made Satsuki happy just to see it.
Before she could ask Itachi about the good news, her father spoke again, "The Village Officials recommended you personally, not your Jonin Instructor. You are a rare case. Make sure you meet their expectations."
"I will." The young Genin affirmed resolutely, despite the fact that some of the relief had faded from his face.
Desperately wanting to join the conversation, Satsuki pushed her way past her brother, and wedged herself between them, "Hey, Tou-chan, what's happening with Ita?" She asked, her voice filled with excitement.
"Nothing you need be concerned with," The smile that had been on Fugaku's face had dimmed at her entrance, and with it, the smile on Satsuki's had vanished, "Go help your mother with dinner."
Satsuki huffed, shoved her way past Itachi, and ran to the kitchen where she found her mother hard at work. The sullen girl appeared at her mother's side with a very noticeable frown, when her mother gave her a curious look as to ask what was wrong, Satsuki told her, "I have to help with dinner!"
Mikoto, being the knowledgeable kunoichi and housewife that she was, understood immediately, and nodded her head, "Oh, thank goodness!" She exclaimed to her daughter, "I thought I was going to have cut all these tomatoes all by myself." And gestured to the pile of plump red vegetables on the other side of the counter, and she smirked as Satsuki's eyes lit up again.
"I can help!" The girl declared, bouncing on her feet at the thought.
The Uchiha Matriarch grinned widely as she produced a kunai from nowhere, spun it around in a blur on her index finger before burying it in the cutting board closest to the tomatoes. "Well then, better get to it."
Satsuki rushed to retrieve the kunai as fast as she could, well she would have had her mother not grabbed her by the shoulder and scolded her for something about running in the kitchen, as the older woman made her way to the fridge.
She could smell the smoked tuna shavings as soon as they were taken out of the refrigerator, and the smile on her face began to hurt as it spread so widely across her face at the thought of her favourite meal being prepared. Her mother was the best.
Naruto was on a mission.
Braving the streets of Konoha, eyes front, locked onto his target. For once, not bothered by the negative emotions of the villagers, if only because one of his own had taken over. Worry.
Soon he had entered the Academy complex and was marching towards the Administrative Divisions ignoring the harsh looks he received from the staff, but not their feelings of antipathy, as he began to trudge up the flights of stairs with his short legs. When he found himself in front of the Hokage's office, he could barely keep himself from barging in and just managed to knock for the sake of getting what he wanted.
The wait lasted only a few dozen seconds, but it felt like hours and Naruto had begun to deform the doorknob in his hands.
"Enter," came the voice of the man he'd coming look for. Wasting no time, Naruto threw the door open fast enough to see some ninja shunshin out the windows, but paid little attention to their exit. Naruto was on a mission, he stomped up to the desk of the most powerful man in the village, and knelt in front of the God of Shinobi.
"Oh, Naruto, what a pleasant surprise," the young boy was a little put off to see the old man wasn't wearing his usual robes or the hat that came with his office, but was instead hauling back on that pipe of his and the air around him was full of dark grey smoke. Naruto had wanted this to be as formal a meeting as any mission.
"What brings you to my office today, my boy?" asked the Hokage, in a tone that more resembled the type of greeting you'd expect from a jovial grandfather rather than a military dictator. Naruto had little doubt it worked on other kids his age, but Naruto wasn't fooled. The old man didn't like being around him, didn't like speaking to him, especially answering his questions. Of course, the legendary ninja was the height of subtlety and deception, his expressions gave nothing away, nor did the tone of his voice or his choice of words. It was the kind of skill that people would say 'No one would be able to tell if he was lying', but he was someone who could, and he knew the old man couldn't stand the sight of him.
Not that he took it personally, it wasn't dislike or disgust he sensed, it was unease, awkwardness and such an enormous amount of guilt that made Naruto sure the Hokage counted the moments until he could escape. Guilt that made it a certainty that the Hokage at least believed he had done something to wrong him, only Naruto had grown up surrounded by people who hated him for no apparent reason, so the Hokage feeling guilty wasn't something that kept him up at night.
In any case, this wasn't a social visit.
"Hokage-sama, I am here to submit a mission request at whatever rank you deem suitable for the task, for which I'm willing to pay whatever price you consider fair to ensure the mission's success." Naruto wasn't going to accept anything less. He'd pay for a dozen S-rank missions, he'd hire every jōnin in the village if he had to. For that matter, he'd hire every village if he could, he just wouldn't mention that to the Hokage.
"A mission?" the Hokage was visibly surprised, "What kind of mission, Naruto?"
"To locate and retrieve Tsunade Senju, Hokage-sama." Naruto answered, making sure to keep his posture straight and his chin up.
There came that guilt again, and the man seemed to age a decade as he slumped in his chair. For a while, he just stared at him sadly, as if hoping his look would make Naruto change his mind, but he wasn't phased in the least, and met the Hokage's gaze without blinking. Eventually, with a sigh, he spoke "Naruto, child, we've talked about this before, Tsunade-chan... she just can't stop what she's doing and return to the village, I know how hard it must be for you, but-"
"I'm not a baby lost without his mother, Hokage-sama," Naruto interrupted causing the man to flinch at the curt words from such a small boy, who was far too annoyed by the implication than a child his age had any right to be, "I have reason to believe that she's in danger."
Deciding to humour him, the Hokage played along, "And what reason might that be?"
Like he had expected the question, Naruto reached into his haori and Hiruzen took note that his students' son was outgrowing his clothes, the boy produced a piece of worn-out paper and pushed it in into his hands for perusal. It didn't take the man long to read Tsunade's letter, decipher its meaning and realize what a mistake she had made, and to lament the one young Naruto had.
Still, this didn't help Hiruzen in the moment, how was he supposed to explain to the boy that his mother's 'promise' was no more than an idle notion sprung from a drunken stupor and if Tsunade even remembered it at all, she had no intention of keeping her word. He had tried to keep the boy's parents' vices secret from him, for his sake and theirs. He saw little good in revealing their demons to a boy that had one of his own. It was only due to their absence seeming to be permanent that had forced him to abandon his excuse that Naruto's parents were on an extended mission, the boy had been quick to notice that no other child had parents who were both gone at once, let alone for so long.
Not having answered the boy, and probably having sensed his conundrum Naruto became desperate and started to expand on the letter, "She sent that a month ago, Hokage-sama, and she still hasn't made it back! I haven't gotten anything from her since to suggest she was delayed, she must have been attacked! Maybe it was Orochimaru," the name prompted another flinch from the rogue's former teacher, "or nuke-nin, whatever it was, it had to be something big to catch her! She needs help, Hokage-sama, right away, I've already waited too long, what if she-"
"Naruto," it was Hiruzen's turn to interrupt, "I'm sure that Tsunade-chan is alright, she is one of the few S-rank ninjas in the world and though this does not make her invulnerable, it does make it incredibly unlikely that she would be taken quietly."
"What if she was attacked on the road? Or she coul-" before Naruto could finish asking his speculative questions, the Hokage answered.
"Then she would have destroyed the road, and escaped, or destroyed the road and everything around it before being taken and I would know if such a thing had happened." the old man said with an air of finality, followed by an exhalation of smoke for good measure.
Losing his temper, the boy shouted"You can't know that!"
Unfazed, but with a sterner face, the Hokage replied "I would know as much as I know anything, Naruto. I know Tsunade, and I trust in my students' ability to be sure of that at least."
"I'm not sure!" Naruto barked, "I'm the one making the mission request, I'll be the one paying for it. If she's fine then I'll have just spent a few ryo, but if she's in trouble I have to do something!"
The two of them just stared at each other, both of them hoping that the other would waiver and go along with their plan.
"I cannot sanction this mission, Naruto."
"Why not? Ninja take tracking missions all the time, it's your job to find jobs for them to do, I have the money to pay for it, what's the problem?"
"If I jumped at every letter my ninja wrote to their children our village would be empty."
"Who else is coming to you with a mission request, huh? What other children are trying to pay for an easy job? Is my money not good enough?"
"It is not, 'your' money, Naruto, that is an allowance left in your care by your parents, both of which I am beyond certain would not want you wasting it on such things."
"Hmpf," the boy snorted, "If you know them so well, where the hell are they?!"
"Naruto!" reprimanded the Hokage, "This is unbecoming of you, you will not take that kind of language with me."
"Or what?" challenged the young Senju, "You'll ground me? Send me to bed? What're you going to do that'll keep me from trying to keep her safe, huh? What can you do?"
Hiruzen Sarutobi was not a man used to having his authority challenged, what's more is that Naruto was right. Even if there was some punishment that might frighten Naruto, he would not inflict it on the poor boy for the crime of missing his mother. Thankfully, it did leave him an out.
"That will be all, Naruto." dismissed the Hokage, gesturing to his aides to bring in his next appointment.
Naruto did not take this well. He screamed "What?!" before slamming his hands palm first against the man's desk, and having inherited his mother's monstrous strength, broke it in half.
A raucous crash of splintering wood rang out, papers were thrown across the room, the Hokage had to lean back in his seat to avoid the wreckage, the Anbu were on the scene in a moment to take stock of the threat as the Third's assistants scrambled to collect the scattered documents.
As for Naruto, he just stared at the Hokage, with a badly disguised look of betrayal and disappointment, before huffing and turning his back to walk out the door, once he reached the exit, he stopped and turned his head to give his last word. "You can send the bill for your desk to my mother," before taking his leave.
"That little brat, I can't believe he would disrespect you like that-" muttered one of the chunins on duty, before being quieted by a glare from the God of Shinobi. With a sigh of smoke, the old man turned to the portrait of Lord Tobirama, his sensei, and Naruto's uncle, imaging the young boy having teleported away with an "I'm disappointed, Saru", or the young boy lingering outside his door, drawing circles on the floor with a storm cloud over his head as Lord Hashirama might've done, or even Tsunade-chan puffing out her cheeks as she pretended to hold her breath while breathing through her nose as if he wouldn't notice.
Sarutobi had never expected to live long enough to see himself presiding as Hokage while his teacher's great-grandchildren ran around. The old regret of not forcing the issue with Tsunade to take the hat after Minato's death surged up again.
Still, he couldn't just let Naruto stew in this belief that she in danger for long, if the boy was anything like his father, he would soon be trying to mount a rescue himself, as the last Senju in the village, and even more importantly the Jinchuriki of the Kyuubi, that simply could not be allowed to happen.
"Cat!" barked the Hokage.
In a swirl of leaves, the Anbu operative with purple hair appeared in front of him, awaiting her orders.
"Yes, Hokage-sama?"
"Find Shisui Uchiha, and bring him to me."
Staring down at the ruin that was his desk, a deeper regret filled his heart as he filled his lungs with a long draw on his pipe. There was only one way after all to convince Naruto that his mother was safe without telling the boy the truth. He would have to reach such a conclusion by himself.
It would fall to Shisui to ensure that... again.
Lord Tobirama's portrait seemed to glare at him from his place on the wall.
Hiruzen leaned back in his chair, tried to justify it to himself. Had they not left it all for him to take care of then maybe it could have gone differently, but they had all gone, and while the Hokage could not find it in his heart to blame Tsunade for leaving, he would have to do what was needed.
For the good of Konoha.
He would just have to hope that it would be good for Naruto too. He hoped, but with each passing day he felt it less and less.
Back atop his house, reading the letter, trying to find something in it that suggested a possible delay, it wasn't until a teardrop fell onto the page leaving a blot on the ink did he realized he was crying. He'd never felt so useless before in his entire life. The Toads had come back saying it was a "No go" from his father, the legendary Sage with his great spy network was apparently too busy to find the mother of his child. His attempts to try and convince his summons to reverse summon him out of the village to talk to his father himself had been met with 'acceptance on the condition he got parental approval', and ever since whenever he tried to summon a toad or a slug, all he'd get were tadpoles and sluglings.
Even Lady Katsuyu had not come in weeks, which was especially troubling, not only since the great slug matriarch would know best of all of them what had happened to her summoner, but he had thought they were close beyond just being her son. There had been many a time when Naruto was feeling lonely that he would summon a fraction of her to keep him company as he foraged in the forest and listen to her describe what safe to eat and what was not. He thought she liked him too.
He was sure that his mother was in some sort of trouble, she had made him a promise she would return and then nothing. Why hadn't the Hokage been able to see that? Why hadn't he listened to him?
He stared at the faces of the First & Second, and when they did not have any answers to give him, he could not help but glance at the stone visage of the Third and found it to be as stern and unquestionable a likeness as the man himself.
The Hokage had refused to help him. Refused to help one of the village's heroes who was so clearly in peril, he went so far as to refuse his ninjas a payday for it.
As disheartened as Naruto was, the path ahead of him was clear.
It was up to him to find her.
Now, he wasn't foolish enough to think he could escape the village without anyone noticing and coming after him, and nor did he believe he would be able to locate her or be able to assist her even if he found her.
Not yet.
He would have to train, it was time he took up the family business. He would use his sensory abilities, his healing factor, and vast reserves of chakra to become a great ninja in record time.
Soon, sooner than anyone else would think possible, he would leave the village.
He was going to find his mother, or die trying.
Dread.
A shiver went up Naruto's spine, as he turned to watch the figure of a Crow masked Anbu land on his roof.
Startled, and unnerved by the man's emotions, Naruto stuttered out a greeting, "Hello, Crow-san, d-do you come here often?"
"Hello, Senju-sama," was all the Anbu said, and then he just stared at him.
Naruto tried to avoid his gaze out of awkwardness, and after half-an-hour of being watched by a stranger on the top of his roof he tried to leave, "Well, I sure am tired, I think I'm going to go to bed early tonight, good evening, Crow-san."
He stood up and started to walk towards the crates he had set up on the side of his house to get up and down from the roof, when he felt a gust of air at his back, immediately followed by a hand on his shoulder.
Guilt.
Through physical contact, Naruto almost buckled under the weight of the negative emotions coming from the Anbu, soon followed by his own feelings of fear and panic. It was enough to set him off towards another panic attack.
The Anbu turned his face with his hands, and Naruto looked straight into the Crow mask he wore. Naruto wanted to bring up his hand to his mouth so he could bite his thumb. He would have to summon help, as he moulded his chakra, he started to beg his ancestors that they wouldn't send a tadpole this time. Ma & Pa would help him, they'd wipe the floor with any Anbu. Maybe he'd summon Gamabunta too, and Gamaken & Gamahiro while he was at it.
But he was frozen stiff and gasping for air.
Sorrow. Regret. Shame.
Why wouldn't he just let him go!
Naruto shut his eyes close tight and apologized in his head to his mother. It didn't look like he was going to find her now.
And then, nothing. The negative emotions he was sensing from the Anbu vanished, as did the hand on his shoulder.
Slowly, Naruto opened his eyes and found that the Anbu had disappeared. Leaves were falling in the place the man had only moments ago stood.
Naruto collapsed in a heap and tried to catch his breath again.
What had he been thinking?! Leave the village? With those crazy Anbu guys watching him all the time? By the time he became a ninja good enough to fool an Anbu, it'd be too late to do anything for his mom.
He'd just have to stay in the village for now and hope for the best. Yeah, that seemed like a good idea. The Hokage had said she was fine anyway, and he knew best. His mother was fine, and he should stay in the village. His mother was fine, he should stay in the village, and trust the Hokage.
Naruto clutched his head as a massive migraine sent a sharp pain through him, "Ow, now I've got a headache too, maybe I should turn in early tonight. Today sucked."
Jumping off the roof onto his crates, Naruto resolved to start training anyway, he really needed to get over these panic attacks, and hopefully, get his emotion-sensing under control too. He'd summon Ma & Pa in the morning and see if they'd help him practice, they were super strong even if they were little, he was sure they could show him a thing or two if they wanted.
As long as they didn't send another tadpole.
Uchiha Compound
"Nii-san, you promised you'd help me with my shurikenjutsu!" an outraged little sister yelled, brandishing sharp metal objects at her bashful older brother as he got ready to leave in the foyer of their home.
A wide-eyed Anbu agent attempted to talk her down, "I'm sorry, Imouto, but I've got to go on an urgent mission. As an Anbu, I can't help it when I have to leave. I swear the next time I'm free, I'll help you as much you like."
"But you promised..." a disappointed, yet mostly mollified Satsuki protested.
Seeing he was almost there, Itachi was about to lift her spirits, when the stern voice of their father made itself known, "That's enough, Satsuki," the reprimand startled the kunai out of her small hand, and it was the only extraordinary skill of her elder brother that it managed to avoid landing on her feet, while still not alerting the attention of the Uchiha patriarch.
"Itachi is a respected member of the Anbu, performing his duties for the Clan and the village, he does not have time to cater to the whims of children." Fugaku scolded.
"Y-yes, sir." a chastened Satsuki answered, with a bowed head.
Itachi, however, was not so affected, and met his father's gaze coldly, who kept it for as long as he thought necessary, before taking his leave. Turning to his little sister, Itachi tapped her on the forehead, "I'll see you soon, Imouto." and he too left.
Satsuki, left alone in the foyer, stood still for a moment and tried to sort out how she felt, before deciding to go find her mother.
She found her, in the living room, folding clothes and humming a tune. Satsuki ran up to her, and started explaining the situation to her as fast as she could, "Kaa-chan, Itachi-nii promised that he would help me with my shurikenjutsu, but he had to go on a mission, so now I don't have anyone to help with my training, and if I don't get help with my training, I'll never be able to match nii-san, and tou-san won't-"
"Alright, take it easy," Mikoto warned before Satsuki was about to explode, "Start over, and slower."
Satsuki explained her predicament again to her mother, struggling to contain herself.
Mikoto smiled knowingly and patted her daughter on the head. "Would you like me to help you with your shurikenjutsu?"
"It wouldn't be the same, Kaa-chan, this is serious!" Satsuki huffed, then promptly froze as the temperature of the room dropped well below zero, and she slowly turned to the horrifying gaze focused on her, staring through her with red eyes glowing in the darkness, her mother asked "Do you think I'm unqualified to instruct my own daughter?"
Satsuki shook her head so hard it threatened to fall off, "No! No! You can definitely teach me! We should go right now actually!"
Just like that, Mikoto returned to normal and smiled, and the mother & daughter grabbed their things.
Leaving the house, Mikoto decided to run some errands in the village first with her daughter for company, and though put off, Satsuki wisely did not complain.
On their way into the village, they passed Uchiha Senbei, the bakery with the best rice crackers in the whole village, ran by a nice older couple, Uruchi-ba was outside sweeping in front of their store when she noticed Satsuki walking along with her mother.
"Good morning, Satsuki," the elderly lady greeted, "Off to the village with your mother, are you?"
Satsuki nodded eagerly, "Uh-huh, we're going to pick up some tomatoes from the grocer!"
"Oh, aren't you precious," Uruchi gushed, "it won't be long now till you have youngsters of your own, and you'll be dragging them along with you, just like your mother."
Balking, Satsuki denied it, "No way, I'm going to be an awesome ninja like my brother." as Mikoto laughed.
"Ah, more like your mother than you know," Uruchi joked, "Speaking of your older brother, I just saw him walk by, and he has grown into quite the strapping young man. Such a talented ninja, graduating from the academy at the age of seven, and a chūnin by ten."
"Yeah, and he activated his Sharingan when he was eight." Satsuki agreed on her favourite topic of conversation.
"That's right, isn't it. The pride of the Uchiha Clan, no doubt about it," Uruchi commented, "By the way, Satsuki, how old are you now?"
Satsuki stiffened in embarrassment, knowing that she had not come close to matching her brother's accomplishments when he was her age.
Thankfully, Teyaki-ji arrived to rescue, "Now, now, dear, that's enough of that."
Uruchi turned to her husband, "Enough?"
"The girl has plenty of time to become an excellent ninja just like her older brother, and all the time in the world to choose if she wants little ones of her own," Teyaki looked to Satsuki, "You just do your best, study hard, mind your mother, and you'll do fine. No matter how things turn out, we'll be proud of you."
Satsuki nodded in relief, then bid her goodbyes along with her mother, "See you later, Teyaki-ji, Uruchi-ba!"
The course of the day's events had left Satsuki with a lot to think about, and she deeply wanted to discuss them with her mother, yet she was having a difficult time working up the nerve to do so.
Her feelings regarding how she matched up to her brother, were still too raw for her to even comprehend, so she refrained from asking about that, so she asked the next thing that came to mind, "Kaa-chan, why does father like Itachi more than me?"
The question did not seem to surprise, Mikoto, who had been preparing for it for some time now, "It's not that your father likes you less than your brother, Satsuki, it's just that he treats you both differently because you're different people."
Satsuki was not satisfied with this answer, and voiced a long-held suspicion, "I bet if I was a boy, he'd treat me the same."
Mikoto laughed, to her daughter's chagrin, "Oh, come now, Satsuki. That has nothing to do with it. Your father acts the way he does, because he has responsibilities that come with being the head of the clan."
"What does that have to do with this?" asked Satsuki, failing to see the connection.
"Your father is the head of the clan, and because of that, he has to treat Itachi differently than he would just as his father. He has to ensure that Itachi is the best ninja that he can be, and though this is done partly for the sake of the entire Uchiha Clan, he does it mostly to keep Itachi safe." Mikoto explained, "You're still so young, you've only ever seen Itachi in the next stage of life. When you become a ninja, you'll notice it too."
Satsuki had begun to understand, "But why-"
"I know your father can seem strict and distant sometimes, but that's only because that's how he was raised to be, how he's expected to be. It's his way of protecting you, to make you stronger. Don't ever think for a moment it's because he doesn't love you with all his heart," Mikoto assured, "And can I tell you a secret?"
The young girl nodded, "When I'm alone with your father, you're all he talks about."
Satsuki's widened, "What?"
"That's right, he wants to know every detail of your day, all your triumphs and all your hardships. You're always on his mind, Satsuki." Mikoto told her, "And mine too."
Satsuki blushed, trying not to be seen by the other passersby.
When they found herself in the center of the village, they were momentarily brought to another stop by a passing object, a young boy sprinted past them with a determined look on his face.
Satsuki scoffed at the boy getting in their way, but her mother giggled, and she looked to Mikoto for an explanation. "Do you know that boy, Kaa-chan?"
Mikoto shook her head, "Not personally, but I do know of him, I'm glad he seems to have found an outlet to occupy his time."
Staring up her mother, Mikoto pulled her to the side, and took a knee to look her daughter in the eye, "Satsuki, I'd like you to make me a promise, can you do that?"
Satsuki, taking note of the seriousness in her mother's tone, nodded her head resolutely.
"I want you to give that boy a chance," Mikoto asked, even as her daughter frowned, "I had a friend like that once, and if he's even a bit like her, it'll be worth your while to have him as a friend."
Satsuki did not see the point of having boys as friends, nor did she understand why her mother took an interest in a boy that they'd only just seen running around in the streets, but Satsuki was not going to second guess her mother. "Alright, Kaa-chan, I promise I will."
"Good girl." her mother patted her on the head with a tranquil smile, and they continued on their errand.
After a little while, a thought occurred to Satsuki, "What happened to your friend, Kaa-chan?"
The smile on her mother's face was replaced with a frown that only those close to you could recognize, "We lost touch."
Satsuki thought that was very strange considering what her mother had just said about her friend, but let it go.
It'd been a long day for her already, and she was just looking forward to dinner.
Author's Notes:
Please Favorite and Follow if you liked it.
More importantly, I hope you're all staying safe and well, please take care!
I'd love to hear your thoughts on the chapter, so please consider leaving a REVIEW if you have the time. I try to answer them all, if only to give my appreciation or to have a discussion on a subject I enjoy. It's entirely up to you, but if you do want or expect a response, please check to see that you have PM turned on.
Feel free to PM me or ask a question in the review if you have any questions you'd like me to answer about the story.
I don't have a problem with Yaoi, that's not why Satsuki is a girl. I just don't like MPreg.
What's going on with Tsunade, Jiraiya, and Kushina will be answered in the next chapter. Live with some suspense.
I ghosted this story for a long time because of the negativity I got for it, and at the time, a part of me wondered if it was justified. Now I have more confidence in my writing ability so I'm getting back to writing a story that refuses to leave my mind. Should update fairly regularly now since I know where I want the story to go and Naruto fanfic is easy to write.