CHAPTER 5
Casey and Elle return from Trick a Treat, it was passed Elle's bedtime. Casey walks in first putting the keys on the coffee table.
"Elle," Casey's voice was soft. "how about you sort out your candy tomorrow?"
"Let's go home and show Jane and Maura."; says Elle as she stands by the doorway, with a little confusion in her eyes.
"Sweetie, you are home," Casey tries to sound reassuring. "with Daddy. You are tired and so is daddy, come."
"No" Elle said quietly, her voice too small, too distant for the warmth that used to fill it.
He walked towards her, gently picking her into his arms. She didn't resist, but she didn't nestle against him either. She just let him hold her, her body stiff in his embrace.
"Hey, kiddo," he murmured, brushing a strand of hair from her face. His hand lingered there, as if trying to reassure both her and himself.
Elle's lip trembled. "I want Janey."
"I know you do, baby," he said, fighting to keep his voice steady.
"Take me to mom and Maura." Elle said, her small voice barely above a whisper.
Casey's heart skipped. He had known this moment would come—he just hadn't realized how much it would hurt.
"Sweetheart," he started, his voice thick, "Jane… she's not your mommy anymore."
Elle furrowed her brow, her eyes narrowing as she processed the words. "Why?" she said.
"It's complicated." Casey's throat tightened.
Elle's lips quivered, and her face crumpled as if she were trying to hold back a storm. "She can come fetch me if you call her, please daddy.," she sobbed, her small hands clutching at his shirt.
Casey's chest tightened painfully as he pulled her closer, feeling the heat of her tears soak through his shirt.
It's two weeks later
Jane sat in her car, parked across the street from Elle's school. The bell rang and kids are running and walking to their parents. Jane is searching for a face, there, at the gate of the school, was Elle, her little purple backpack bouncing with each step as she ran to a waiting car.
A knock on the window made Jane jump, snapping her back to reality. She rolled the window down to see Maura standing there, her face a mix of concern and understanding.
"Hey," Maura said softly, "you've been here for a while."
Jane didn't answer right away. She couldn't. She was afraid that if she spoke, her voice would betray everything she was trying to keep buried.
"I thought we agreed we'd stay away from here," Maura continued gently, sliding into the passenger seat. "It's not good for you nor her."
"I can't help it," Jane admitted quietly, not even bothering to glance in Maura's direction. "I just wanted to see her. To know she's okay."
"She is not the girl you're trying to find," Maura sighed, leaning back in the seat. "Elle is right there. You can go say hi."
Jane shook her head, biting her lip to stop the tears from forming. "We need to find this girl before he does."
"I know," Maura said softly, but her voice carried an edge of concern. "I miss her too, Jane."
"I know," Jane said, her voice barely a whisper. "But it's not that simple."
That Evening, Casey is trying to put Elle down for the night. They both look exhausted. The guilt that had gnawed at him since taking Elle from Jane had only deepened, and his patience was wearing thin. The silence between him and his daughter was becoming unbearable, the tension suffocating.
Casey stood in the doorway, trying to keep his frustration in check, but the sounds of Elle's sobs were getting to him.
"Elle," he said, his voice strained. "You need to stop this. You're safe here, you're home. okay?"
"I want Jane! I want Mom!" Elle cried out, as she curled into a ball in the bed.
"Elle, stop it!" Casey's voice broke as he stepped into the room. His chest tightened, but he was losing control. "You need to listen to me! Jane isn't your mother, she's just daddy's friend who did daddy a favor and looked after you when I was deployed. That's all."
Elle continued to cry, her voice breaking his heart. "Mom!"
"You need to stop asking for her, Elle," he said, his voice cold, sharper than it should have been. "I'm your father, and I'm here."
Casey felt his frustration growing, and needed to walk away, he closed the door and hoped Elle would cry herself to sleep like she has been doing this past few weeks. Outside in the hallway, Casey leaned against the wall, his chest heaving. His emotions were a tornado, his thoughts a jumbled mess, he picks up his phone and types a message to Jane but like every night he deletes it instead of sending.
A month went by, Jane was being impulsive at work. It didn't help that the case was taking an unexpected turn. They were running to find the girl and the killer seem to be on the same pace as them. They found the girl but not without a cost.
At the hospital, Jane was sitting besides Tasha's bed waiting for her to wake up, her arm bandaged and her face bruised from the altercation that had led to her current situation. Tasha started to stir and as she comes to it slowly. Jane holds her arm to reassure her that she is still there.
"Hey sweetie"; says Jane with a smile.
"Why'd you do it?" Tasha asked, her voice shaky. "You didn't have to protect me. You could've just let him take me."
Jane looked at her, her heart aching for this girl who had already been through so much. "I couldn't do that, Tasha. You deserved better. No one should have to face that alone."
Tasha glanced away, her expression a mix of gratitude and confusion. "But now you're hurt because of me."
"Being hurt is part of the job," Jane said, forcing a smile despite the dull throb in her arm. "But protecting people like you is why I do this."
Tasha's gaze dropped to her hands, and Jane could see the walls she had built around herself starting to crack. "You don't know what it's like," Tasha whispered. "Being alone. Not having anyone to care about you."
Jane felt the familiar pang of her own loneliness creeping in, but she also felt something else—a growing awareness of her own role as a caregiver. "You're not alone anymore, Tasha. You have me. You have the police, and there are people who want to help you."
A moment of silence passed between them, and Jane took a deep breath, feeling the weight of her own truth pressing down on her. "You know," she began, her voice softer, "I have a little girl, she recently turned 5. Her name is Elle."
Tasha looked up, curiosity sparking in her eyes. "Elle?"
"Yeah, she's my daughter," Jane said, the admission feeling monumental. "I didn't plan to be a mom, but… she's mine now. I love her more than anything."
Jane paused, letting the reality of her feelings settle in. "I never thought I could be a mom. I didn't even know what that meant until I had her in my life. But now, I can't imagine my world without her."
"Where is she?" Tasha asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Jane swallowed hard, the ache in her chest intensifying. "Her dad took her back. I thought it was what was best for her. But every day since, I've missed her like crazy. I worry about her."
Maura walks in leaning on the door frame. As they shared their vulnerabilities, Jane could see Tasha beginning to open up as well. "I always thought no one would care if I was gone. That no one would miss me."
Jane shook her head vehemently. "You're wrong. You matter. You deserve to be safe, to have a family, even if it's not what you expect."
Tasha's expression shifted, a glimmer of hope breaking through her sadness. "Do you think I could find that? A family?"
"I believe you can," Jane replied firmly. "You have to let people in, though. It's the hardest part, but it's also the most important. I didn't realize it until I had Elle."