Let's see what this little asshole has to say...

Nineteen

"Thanks." Tori signed the check, and shooed the room service waiter out of the room before his eyeballs could skitter out of his head and ramble across the floor. She shut the door behind him and turned, regarding the bed with a wry grin.

Jade was sprawled across it, the sheet just barely covering what was very obviously a naked body. She had the laptop propped on one thigh, but the other was outside the linen, extending its long, tanned length across the white surface.

Shaking her head, Tori went over to the table and investigated the tray, peeking under one cover and grinning at what she saw. "Hungry, sweetie?"

"Not anymore." Jade drawled.

"Heh." Tori hitched up the edge of Jade's red muscle T-shirt, which she'd stolen and donned after they'd finished their lovemaking. She perched on the edge of the table, arranging a few of the plates on it. "Well, okay – we'll start with this, then." Taking one of the plates, she walked over to the bed and knelt down.

"Happy birthday to you.. happy birthday to you…"

Jade looked up in alarm, to see a beautifully made chocolate something with more chocolate insides and chocolate topping, with berries sitting on the plate. In the center was a single candle. "Awww."

"Happy birthday dear Jade… Happy birthday to you." Tori warbled.

Jade sniffed at the plate, licking her lips appreciatively. "Share?" She blew out the candle with a single puff of air.

Tori sat down on the bed and picked up the fork, cutting off a gooey piece and feeding it to Jade.

"Ooo.. I like that." Jade mumbled. "I just got a data dump from Sinjin." She informed Tori. "DeSalliers stats, financial and otherwise. I figured out why he's so desperate."

"Why?" Tori fed her another forkful of cake as she peered at the screen.

"He's broke." Jade munched. "He invested in two capital ventures that went belly up, and the banks called in some of his loans when they figured out he had paper that wasn't worth the paper it was printed on in his accounts."

"Ahhh." Tori nodded. "Yeah, that makes sense. So Old Uncle offers a windfall to… to what, Jade?" She asked. "Not bring up something – that's the last thing he'd want to do."

Jade gazed at the screen. "No. He'd want him to scuttle the wreck." She realized. "Jesus… that's what it is. He's gonna cannibalize it."

Tori had the fork in her mouth. She drew it out and swallowed the rich mouthful. "Are you saying he's going to wreck something that's already wrecked? To keep anyone from getting anything out of it?"

Jade nodded. "Yeah, but…" She flipped to another screen. "He's got a problem. It's in AVI territorial waters, and he can't just go in there and set off dynamite."

Tori portioned off another forkful and handed it over. "How do you light dynamite underwater, Jade?"

Jade chewed and typed in silence, then swallowed. "Did you get any…"

"Milk? Yeah." Tori set the plate down and went to retrieve it.

"I don't know." Jade answered the previous question. "You'd have to ask my father. His specialty used to be called UDX. Underwater Demolition."

As if by some supernatural invocation, Jade's cell phone rang and when she checked the caller ID, it was familiar. With a tiny, surprised grunt, Jade flipped the phone open. "Hi, Dad."

Tori, on her way back with the milk, goggled. "Wow." She murmured. "Spooky."

"Hey there, Gigi." James West's cheerful voice came through the phone. "How's the vacation going?"

Truth? Jade had microseconds to decide. "Great." She finally said. "We ran into pirates, we're involved in a possible murder case, and Tori got bit by a jellyfish, but other than, that, it's been very cool."

It wasn't often that Jim West was rendered speechless. "Son of a biscuit." He finally spluttered. "Damn, Jade – what the hell you two getting into out there?"

Jade sighed. It was such a long story at this point…. Tori took the phone from her and put it to her ear. "Hey, Dad?"

"Howdy, kumquat."

"I've got sort of a running diary of it – want me to email it to you on Jade's computer?" Tori offered. "I think that'll be easier than us trying to explain it. I'll set it to print out on the printer."

"Ah would appreciate that, kumquat. Mah wife is rattling her eyebrows at me wondering what the hell's going on."

Jade took the phone back. "It's not that bad, Dad." She explained. "Just… complicated." She lifted her hands off the keyboard as Tori crawled into bed next to her and pecked out a few commands.

"Uh huh." James grunted. "Well, anyhow, you having a happy birthday?"

Jade examined the brunette sprawled in her lap. "Yeah, it's great." She replied. "Tori and I have been shopping and.. um.. relaxing all day."

"Relaxing?" Tori murmured. "I certainly wasn't relaxed… yipe!" She squirmed as Jade pinched her. "Stop that." She ran a finger along the inside of Jade's very bare thigh, snickering when she heard Jade's voice break.

"N.. no, Dad, honest. We're fine." Jade cleared her throat. "I've got everything under control." She bit the inside of her lip as Tori tickled her thigh again. "Almost everything."

"Wall, you be careful." James warned. "Hang on."

The phone rustled, then a lighter voice came on. "Jade?"

"Hi, mom." Jade said.

"I'm not going to pretend I have a clue about what's going on, so I'm just going to wish you a happy birthday."

Jade chuckled. "Thanks."

"And I hope you're also having a good annual hypercommercialized forced exchange of personal resources, too."

"Merry Christmas to you, too, mom."

"Merry Christmas, mom!" Tori leaned back and called out. "Good Solstice."

"Tell Tori I said thanks, and thank her for the card." Ceci said. "You kids be careful, hear?"

Tori finished her task, then scooted out of bed and ambled back over to table, before Jade's close, bare proximity spurred her to further amorous adventures.

"We'll be fine, mother." Jade exhaled. "How's Chino?"

"She's just fine." Ceci assured her. "The place is fine, the island hasn't sank, your stock is up two dollars, and I do believe your father has just opened a bottle of champagne, so I'll just have to let you get on with your celebration."

"Have a great night." Jade told her. "Call us if you need anything."

"How about you call us if you need anything?" Ceci countered. "G'night, Jade."

"Night."

Jade had just closed the phone, when a knock came at the door. "Ah. Bet that's our friend." She commented. "Let him in."

Tori turned, putting one hand on her hip. She gazed at Jade with both eyebrows lifted.

Jade stared back at her, then realized what she was looking at. "Oh." She put the laptop aside and stood up, shedding her bed sheets and padding across the wooden floor. She opened her bag and pulled out a pair of shorts and a shirt.

Tori went to the door and leaned on it. "Just a second." She called, peeking through the eyehole to make sure it was Bob, and not something even skunkier.

"Okay." Jade returned the bed and retrieved her laptop, then settled into an armchair instead.

Tori opened the door. "Hi." She stepped back to allow Bob to enter. "C'mon in."

He was dressed in pressed chinos and a neatly ironed polo. "Hi." He gave Tori an eager smile, his eyes flicking over her head to Jade, and then back. "Thanks for calling me… I was hoping I could find you guys again. I really need to talk to you."

"Ah." Jade murmured. "That's good, because we need to talk to you."

Bob walked hesitantly over, and took the seat across from Jade. "I'm sorry, I'm interrupting your dinner?"

Tori had returned to the table. "It's okay. We're used to eating during business." She examined Jade's plate, then walked over and handed it to her. "Bob, you know, I'm really pissed off at you."

Jade set the plate on the chair arm, and continued her work, letting Tori do the talking as they'd planned.

"M.. me?" Bob sounded very surprised. "What did I do?"

"You left two friends of ours in a really bad place last night." Tori gazed seriously at him. "They got hurt." She sat down on the edge of the window, and rested her elbows on her knees. "Why did you do that?"

For a moment, the only sound was the soft, rapid-fire rattling of Jade's laptop keys.

"I thought they'd be fine." Bob finally muttered. "I thought they would go after me, not them." He shifted uncomfortably. "I didn't mean for them to get hurt."

Well. Tori considered. That was actually marginally logical. "Why did you think they'd go after you?" She asked.

Bob got up and paced, visibly nervous. "Why? I'm the one they're after. I'm the one who keeps trying to get down to that wreck. If we'd gotten anything, it'd been on that boat… sure, I thought they'd go after me."

"But they didn't." Tori said.

"No, I…" Bob stared out the window. "I thought I got lucky." He turned. "Hey, it'd be the third time, you know? Besides, those guys looked like they could take care of themselves. What could I have done, anyway?"

Tori stared steadily at him.

"Hey…I admit it. I'm no hero." Bob lifted his hands. "I'm not like you. I'll save my own skin first, and that's just the truth, okay?"

Tori looked at Jade. Jade rolled her eyes and shook her had. Tori sighed, and took a bite of her dinner. "So, why were you looking for us, then?" She asked. "Did you need another diversionary target?"

Bob apparently felt his grilling was over, and that he'd won a point. "No." He gathered his confidence again. "Look, I realized I was going about this the wrong way. I need resources, and help." He faced them. "So, here's the deal."

Jade rested her elbow on the chair arm, while Tori leaned forward attentively.

"I want to make you my partners." Bob said. "Is that a good deal, or what?"

Blue and brown eyes met across the inn room.

Tori sighed. "Bob?"

"Yeah?" He grinned at her. "I know, it's a big sacrifice for me, but…"

Tori tilted her head looking at him with concern. "Did you get dropped on you head a lot as a kid?"

"Huh?" His eyes darted to her.

"I should have stayed naked." Jade commented, shaking her head sadly. "He'd never have noticed."

"Huh?" He looked back and forth at the woman before him.

"Another explicit reason why stupid people shouldn't breed." Tori said shaking her own head.

"What are you guys talking about?"

"I think we should just tie him up and leave him in the closet." Tori decided looking at her wife, who smirked at her in amusement.

"Hey!"