AN Thanks again for the reviews for Chapter Two. So much encouragement and love for this fic. *hearts*
I want to state on record that I hate the intersect. I never found it believable. I never could suspend my disbelief that you can absorb a supercomputer into your brain just by looking at an everyday computer monitor screen :) So I'm extremely reluctant to include it in my story. This is a romance slash love story, and not Sci Fi. So when you see me kind of shrug off and ignore the intersect in this chapter, that's why. I won't rule out using it in a sequel though. But that's a LONG way off. I may even use it in this fiction. Don't know yet. This would actually be my version of Season Six if I owned Chuck, which I don't.
Word Count for this Chapter: 9102
All Roads Lead Back Home
Chapter Three
One day since the beach
It is now morning in the United States and Sarah has been at her mother's home for one night. Sarah is presently awake and she is starting her day and she has been intensely studying her own wedding photograph that is location inside the lounge of her mother's home for the last couple of minutes. Sarah is so fixated on the photograph with her eyes locked onto the look of joy evident by massive smile present on her own face as she just married stares adoringly into her husband's eyes in the photograph.
"You told me it was the happiest day of your life when I asked you how your wedding was," Emma interrupts her daughter's trail of thoughts.
Sarah snaps out of her glance on her own wedding photograph to look at her mother who is now standing within touching distance of her instead.
"Why can't I remember him then, Mom? Why can't I remember my husband making me happy? Why can't I remember the happiest day of my life?" Sarah asks despondently as she gazes at her mother, occasionally shifting her glance down at the floor briefly in her depressed, confused and conflicted state of mind caused from her memory loss as she fights desperately hard once more to attempt to restore her memories inside of her mind as she has been doing every single day since learning that her memories have been forcibly suppressed when Quinn captured and took her away from her husband and from her life that she had been living for the past five years.
"I don't know, sweetheart. I don't know what this whole intersect thing is or what it even does. For a normal person like me, it sounds quite far fetched and pretty unbelievable," Emma admits to her spy daughter.
"Mom, I told him I didn't feel it. But then I met him at the beach and I reconnected emotionally with him again and now I can feel it so much it scares me. I haven't been able to get him out of my mind. And when I think of him I feel strong emotion to him and I don't know why. I can't remember ever feeling as strongly as this before him," Sarah admits in her continued confused state of mind. Everything about her life is so clouded and hazed for her right now. She has no job. She doesn't know who she is. She can't remember her husband. She can't remember her friends. Five full years of her life wiped out or suppressed in an instant. If Sarah's life was a TV show and the main character of that series had just lost five full years of her development and her memory of her husband and the perfect life that she had lived then the writers responsible would be sacked for writing such a shit show, but sadly, it's real life...
"Sweetheart, even though you can't remember it, you can still feel it. Deep inside your heart you know what you have lost. Chuck is your life." Emma states informatively as best she can. Emma has always been a simple woman. Her biggest concern has always been to pay her bills on time.
"Mom, I'm not disputing that. But how can I feel it when I have no memory of it?" Sarah asks her mother for guidance as she continues to gaze into her mother's eyes while her brain is busy elsewhere in a complete world of its own as her mind is occupied entirely by her husband and of their life that he had described to her.
Emma moves her hand to comfortingly rub her daughter's arm. "I don't know neurology, darling. It's just my guess. You should go and see a doctor and look into why you're feeling like this even though you can't remember it right now. Maybe they can help you understand your present condition better," Emma suggests to her daughter with a comforting smile.
Sarah nods her head in acceptance at her mother's suggestion. "I will go and see one when I go back home," Sarah pauses in thought on her final word. Home. But where is my home? How do I get back to my home? How can I go back home when I cannot remember him being my home?
"How happy was I with him, Mom?" Sarah asks as she once more glances back at her wedding photograph while rotating her glance back to her mother occasionally.
A bright smile erupts onto Emma's face on hearing her daughter's question to her.
"Sweetheart, the way that I seen you look at him…" Emma pauses as she begins to well up and tears leave her eyes on thinking back to how happy she had seen her daughter with her husband.
On seeing her mother break down, Sarah moves to hug her mother and she suddenly feels very emotional herself on seeing her mother suffering.
"I have never seen anybody look as adoringly at anybody as the way that I seen you look at Chuck. He made you so happy. I will be so thankful to him for the rest of my life for how happy and how loved he made my darling daughter to feel," she declares emotionally as emotions overwhelm both the mother and daughter as tears now leave Sarah's own eyes on hearing her mother's powerful words to her.
"Trust him, Sarah. For me, for my son-in-law and for yourself. You deserve to be happy and to be loved. Allow him to love you once more. He will be by your side for the rest of his life," Emma declares powerfully with conviction to her daughter.
Sarah starts to stare into her mother's eyes in deep contemplation over her mother's words and her advice given to her...
Later that morning...
Sarah and Molly are presently sitting on the sofa inside their mother's home. There is some slight friction in their relationship because just like Chuck, Sarah cannot remember the time that she has spent with Molly when Team Bartowski had saved her and Emma and even the many phone conversations they have shared together since that day.
Molly then interrupts the silence between the two now siblings. "Are you sick, sister Sarah?" Molly asks her sister as they gaze at each other from where they are seated together on the sofa.
Molly's words catch Sarah completely by surprise evident by the shocked facial expressions now present on her face. "What makes you say that, sweetheart?" Sarah asks as she smiles warmly at the young girl she rescued all those years ago.
"You don't remember me. Do you?" Molly asks accompanied by a sad pout on her face.
Hearing Molly's latest words cause Sarah's eyes to water.
Sarah shakes her head no in admittance as she continues to smile affectionately at her sister. "Not right now. But I'll get better. I just had an accident," she says reassuringly to her.
"What about Chuck?" Molly then asks as she continues to pout and sulk on not being able to spend time with her most favorite friend right now. Molly is deeply missing Chuck herself right now.
Molly's words once more catch Sarah completely by surprise. "What about Chuck, sweetheart?" Sarah asks softly.
"Did you forget him too? I like Chuck. He's nice. He likes me and his friend Morgan does too," Molly says as her bright smile returns once more on thinking about Chuck and Morgan.
On hearing her sister's words, a bright smile forms onto Sarah's face.
"Yes, he is nice. I want to remember him too, just like I want to remember you," she declares emotionally as she fights back her tears to try and not upset Molly but Molly's blunt sincerity is overwhelming Sarah's emotional wellbeing right now.
"He loves you, sister Sarah," Molly declares to her with a loving smile.
Molly's latest words send Sarah's emotional state over the edge and she starts to sob and she wipes her eyes to try and control her strong emotions.
Molly then moves closer into Sarah and Sarah returns the embrace with the young girl who she only remembers seeing as a baby as they sit together side by side.
"I like him too, Molly." Sarah admits as her emotions continue to pour out of her. I just wish I could remember him to go along with that.
"Please be ok. I don't like to see people hurting. It makes me sad," Molly says comfortingly with a bright smile to her sister.
Emma's heartstrings pull as she watches her much older daughter break down emotionally with her younger daughter...
That afternoon
"Who's this?" Sarah asks as she looks at the stuffed dog that Molly is presently playing with.
"This is Rex," Molly admits sadly as she has already told her sister about her stuffed dog.
"Hi Rex," Sarah smiles warmly. "You know, I used to have a stuffed dog when I was young and I named him Bunny."
"I know, you told me," Molly admits with a sad smile to her sick sister.
Sarah sighs aloud in despondence over her memory loss and forgetting her adopted sister and her life. "And what did you tell me?" she asks with a faint smile.
"I said that's a funny name for a dog," Molly laughs sweetly.
Sarah giggles for a long moment and she breathes out another deep sigh.
"You know what, Molly? I need to get to know you better once more. Like I need to get to know Chuck again. So let's go out to the park," Sarah says with an adoring smile.
"Yay!" Molly screeches excitedly.
"Let's go and tell Mom," Sarah says as she begins to stand up from where she had been seated.
On hearing Sarah's words to her, Molly jumps off the sofa and she takes Sarah's hand and they walk to their mother.
"Mommy, Sarah is taking me to the park!" Molly exclaims excitedly.
"That sounds great! You two go and enjoy yourselves and have lots of fun together," Emma says enthusiastically as she rotates her loving smile between her two daughters.
Sarah returns the warm smile to her mother before looking down to Molly's level. "Let's go and get you ready and then we'll head out," Sarah says as she takes Molly's hand and they walk to Molly's room...
Carmichael Industries
Chuck and Morgan are presently sitting inside of the conference room of Castle together. With Casey gone and with the whole uncertainty surrounding Sarah's recent memory loss, it's just the two best friends remaining and Carmichael Industries is effectively defunct as of this moment.
"What are you going to do with the Intersect, Chuck?" Morgan asks.
"For now, I'll keep it. It's the last thing on my mind right now Morgan. I'm not even in a state to work but I need to be here rather than at our apartment twenty four hours a day thinking about her," Chuck admits with a despondent smile.
Morgan nods his head. "That's understandable, man. I am not gonna let you beat yourself up though, Chuck. Because Sarah is coming back. She's had her first memory of you already and it's only been just over two weeks since she lost her memories. After what happened with you both in Prague, you didn't see Sarah for more than six months and then you dated other people and went another three months until you became official. So two weeks in comparison isn't that long," Morgan states to his best friend in an attempt at reassurance.
"It's a little different now though, Morgan. We're married now. We were about to start a family. The past few weeks of being without her feels like fifty years."
"I get that, man. I'm just trying to stay positive and take any positive I can from the situation. But about the Intersect, are you sure it's a good idea to keep it? After everything that's happened to me and to Sarah and to yourself, shouldn't you get it removed?" Morgan asks worriedly.
"Morgan, this version contains Ellie's fix so it's actually perfectly fine. And besides, I have working governors and I'm wearing one right now so I'll be fine. Let's start talking about how we can shift Carmichael Industries to cyber terrorism."
"Shouldn't we wait for Sarah to come back before we do that?" Morgan interjects.
"Morgan, it's what she wanted. It was her suggestion. We don't need to go ahead with anything. We just have to be realistic and accept that it's possible Sarah may never come back to work with us. And if she doesn't, then we have no reason to be spies any more. And if she does come back, and she still wants to spy, then we'll put aside the new plans until she says otherwise."
Morgan nods his head. "Ok. That sounds like a good plan. But I think we should still continue to take on freelance spy work in the meantime."
"But how, Morgan? We can't exactly do any freelance spy work as a two man operation. We have no team without Casey and Sarah," Chuck reminds his best friend.
"Well firstly, we have the Intersect if you are hellbent on keeping it. And I also have a suggestion as to a new team, if you'll allow me?" Morgan asks as he begins to stand up from where he was formerly sitting at the conference table.
"Sure," Chuck replies as his curiosity gets the better of his best friend's question.
Morgan then starts to walk to the briefing computer. "Hang in with me for a few minutes while I put on screen the idea I have in mind."
"Take your time. My schedule is wide open," Chuck says as he waits patiently for his best friend's idea to appear on screen…
Several minutes later
"Ok, just about done. I have a potential recruit that we can hire to work with us. She will be appearing on screen right about… Now," Morgan says as he pushes a button on the keyboard and a file appears on the projector.
On seeing the person in question appear on screen, Chuck blinks six times in rapid succession as a grin begins to form on his face. "Morgan, you're a genius," Chuck exclaims.
Morgan begins to chuckle and nods his head in acceptance of his best friend's praise. "Yeah, I kind of think so too."
"What made you think of Carina?" Chuck asks as he continues to study all known information about Carina Miller.
"Well with us trying to save Sarah the last couple of weeks it made me think back to when we saved Sarah way back then just before your wedding too. Do you know where she is? I have no way of contacting her because Alex made me delete her number. Heh."
On hearing his best friend's words, Chuck begins to chuckle. "She came to visit us a few times after our wedding. The last we heard she was exploring and travelling. Her career in the DEA washed up after what she did to help me save Sarah. Morgan, you are absolutely right buddy. We owe Carina a job for everything that she did for myself and Sarah."
Morgan nods his head strongly in agreement. "I agree, Chuck. And Sarah will even have a familiar face around her if she does decide to work with us once more."
Chuck's grin grew even wider on hearing Morgan's latest words. "Let's contact her and see what she has to say," Chuck says as he stands up and he walks over to where his best friend is standing so that he can get in contact with Carina to see if she wants to hear about a job proposition...
That evening
Emma had just finished speaking to Chuck on the telephone and Molly is now presently locked in conversation talking to her favorite friend Chuck on the telephone who has called most nights to speak to Emma and to Molly since they first met and Sarah had too before all of this had happened to her.
And while Molly is occupied, the other two women in the home are also engaging in conversation.
"Sarah, I've never asked anything of you and you know that. I always let you do whatever you wanted, and to go off with your dad," Sarah nods her head in agreement with her mother's words. "But I'm asking something of you now."
"Ok," Sarah agrees as she listens to her mother's upcoming demand.
"Please don't go back to the CIA," Emma pleads with her daughter and she becomes emotional at the prospect of losing her child. "I can't lose my daughter. I don't want to and can't face seeing anything else happen to you."
Sarah moves to hug her mother briefly. "Mom, I'm finished with that life I promise you. The spy life has taken so much from me. I never want to go back to it ever again," Sarah says reassuringly with conviction.
"What will you do instead?" Emma asks.
Sarah shrugs her shoulders over her confused and clouded life. "I don't know," she admits. "Spying and running with dad is all that I know. I don't know how to stick around."
"But you'll try?" Emma asks hopeful as she looks pleadingly into her daughter's eyes.
"Mom, something inside my heart tells me I need to go back to him. I don't know if it will work out or not because I can't remember him. But I'll try. If I was as happy and as content with my life as you have told me, then I owe it to myself and to him to try."
A bright smile forms on Emma's face on hearing her daughter's response and she rubs her daughter's arm. "I'm so proud of you," she says in a very loving tone of voice.
"I'm nothing to be proud of, Mom," she says with distaste. "You deserve a daughter who can remember your son-in-law," Sarah is about to continue but she is interrupted from speaking on Molly arriving in the grownups vicinity once more and she pauses from her grown up conversation with her mother to watch and listen to Molly instead.
"I love you too, Chuck! I will speak to you tomorrow!" Molly shouts excitedly into the handheld phone with a wide smile of happiness from talking to her best friend Chuck.
Sarah's heart immediately soars on hearing the declaration of her family member.
Molly then walks into the vicinity of where her mother and sister are standing.
"Sarah, I am finished speaking with Chuck. Do you want to talk to him?" Molly asks as she begins to smile adoringly at her sister.
Sarah returns the bright smile. "Yes, sweetheart."
Molly then hands over the phone into Sarah's waiting hand and Sarah begins to walk off and into the bedroom she is staying in for privacy to have an adult conversation with Chuck.
Sarah then moves to sit onto the bed and a smile begins to form on her face at the prospect of talking to Chuck. And on raising the handheld receiver up to her face, she begins to speak to her husband.
"Hi. I'm sorry to have kept you waiting. I kind of like speaking on phones in private," she admits with a suppressed laugh.
Chuck laughs into Sarah's ear on hearing his wife's admission. "I know you do. Hi."
Sarah laughs back on hearing his response to her. "Of course you do. So how was your day, Chuck?" Sarah asks him warmly.
There is a brief pause and Sarah assumes that he is attempting to mask what he really wants to say to her which causes her heart to soar once more on knowing that her husband is suffering without her.
"It was productive I guess. I spent the first of many days with Morgan planning out the future of Carmichael Industries."
There is another pause in the conversation. He is probably waiting for her to inquire what he will do with it. But Sarah made a promise to her mother and to herself and she means it. She is through with spying. She needs to move on and to find herself again and she can't do that if she returns to spying after everything it has done to her life. Sarah can't even remember the happiest day of her life. She can't remember her husband. She can't remember her adopted sister. Hell she can't even remember purchasing her own car that she now drives. If that is not an acceptable reason to leave behind the spy life for good then she doesn't know what is. Frankly, she would have to be crazy and missing many brain cells to return to the spy life after what it has now done to her in causing amnesia and making her forget the past five happy years of her life.
"How was your day?" he asks eventually on conceding that Sarah would not ask about his plans for a company she can't recall being part of.
"It was what I needed after everything that has happened the last couple of weeks," she admits. "I took Molly to the park and we played for a while."
"That sounds perfect. I am glad you had a good day. I wish I would have been there with you," he admits in a despondent tone of voice.
"Why?" Sarah inquires deeply interested as she can't recall any man she'd known that would have loved to spend a full day with a child that was not their own.
"Because I love her. She's my family. Your Mom is too of course, but I love kids," he admits with a warm chuckle.
On hearing her husband's words to her, Sarah freezes in place and she stares at the carpet on the floor of the bedroom over hearing his intense declarations of love and the reality of the situation. Chuck is indeed Molly's family, as he is also her mother's family. His heart-warming love and his blunt realities are a little too overpowering for a woman who can only remember a life being on the run or a life spying.
"Sarah? Are you still there?" he inquires after Sarah had went silent on him for a long moment.
Sarah gives her head a wobble to restart her brain once more. "Yeah. Sorry."
"Did I say too much?" Chuck asks sympathetically on feeling that he may have caused distress for Sarah.
"No, Chuck. You only said the truth. You are their family. I'm just still coming to terms with it and how I feel about it," she admits as she smiles faintly to nobody as if he was present inside the room with her.
"You're right. I'll try my best to tone down the intensity. I'm just finding it hard because I have built up a great relationship with your mom and Molly since we met them both together," he states despondently into the phone conversation.
Sarah pauses once more and she breathes out a long deep sigh.
Please don't tone down. I don't want you to stop loving me nor my family. It's me that has lost my memory, not you. I just don't know how to tell you this.
"Chuck..." she says but pauses to build up her courage to open herself up to him. "I don't want your relationship with my family to stop or to be put on hold. I won't ever take that away from you, even if things don't work out for us. I just come with a little baggage right now, you know with the whole forgetting who you are and memory loss kind of thing," she admits glumly over the distressing situation her memory loss has placed her in.
"Thank you for that reassurance, it means a lot. And Sarah, I've already told you five years ago that I could be your own baggage handler and the offer still stands," he says as he begins to chuckle.
On hearing her husband's words, Sarah begins to snort with laughter which soon intensifies into full blown laughter as she is unable to control herself.
Meanwhile, out in the hallway, another conversation is ongoing between Molly and her mother...
"Let's get you ready for bed sweetheart," Emma says as she takes her daughter's hand.
"Can I say goodnight to Sarah?" Molly asks with an adorable pout.
Emma was just about to respond to her daughter to tell her when Sarah is finished speaking with her husband when she hears her oldest daughter burst into laughter.
A bright smile forms on Emma's face on hearing her older daughter's happiness. Emma immediately fills up with renewed hope that maybe things will work out after all for her beautiful daughter who deserves more than anybody her husband's love and happiness after everything that has happened to her in her life.
"She will come in to say goodnight to you when she's finished talking to Chuck. Let's leave them be in peace to be happy together for now," Emma says affectionately to her daughter.
Molly nods her head in acceptance and the mother and daughter then enter into Molly's bedroom to put her to bed together...
"You're so sweet, Chuck," Sarah says with a wide smile on composing herself from the laughing fit that Chuck had just entered her into.
"Sweet? Thanks for making me feel like I'm eight, again." he laughs.
Sarah smirks on hearing his response to her. "Again? Have I done it before?" she inquires as she begins to play with her hair with her free hand.
"Yeah," he admits. "On our first real date. You called me sweet and I told you I felt like I was eight, kinda how I'm feeling right now actually."
Sarah laughs once more. "Are you always this cute?" she asks with a bright smile.
"Only with you I am."
Sarah laughs hard once more on hearing her husband's latest words to her.
"Are you just saying that to sweet talk me?" she asks flirtatiously with a wide grin.
"Sarah, if I told you that, then I'd have to kill you."
Sarah laughs once more.
"I'd like to see you try. Besides, you told me you don't even use a real gun," she says with her continued grin.
"There are many ways in which to die, Sarah," he chuckles.
Sarah laughs hard once more on hearing her husband's response. Oh I can certainly see how I fell in love with and married him. He's so funny, approachable, warm and inviting.
"I like you, Chuck," she declares to him with a bright smile now formed on her face.
"Good, because I like you too," he declares right back.
Sarah's smile intensifies further on hearing his words.
"So did you remember anything today?" he then asks hopeful.
On hearing his words, Sarah's smile fades and she fills up with despondence over her amnesia. "No," she admits despondently. But I don't need my memories back to be with you. I like you without them. I hope I get them back though.
"Oh well. Another day, another try. You might have better luck and remember something tomorrow. I should let you go and say goodnight to Molly now."
But I don't want to go yet. I want to carry on talking to you.
"Ok, Chuck. I'll call you tomorrow?" she suggests.
"Great."
"Ok, I'll speak to you then."
"I look forward to it, Sarah."
Yet another smile forms on Sarah's face. "Me too," she admits as she then instantly hears his breathing deepen on hearing her response to him.
"Goodnight, Chuck. Sleep well."
"You too, Sarah."
Just as Sarah begins to disconnect the call, Chuck speaks again and she pauses. "Oh, I forgot. Say goodnight to Molly a final time for me. Ok?" he asks.
Sarah smiles once more on hearing her husband's demand.
"Ok, Chuck."
"Sarah, thank you. Goodbye"
"Goodbye."
Sarah then ends the call and on putting down the phone, she collapses back to lay onto the bed in the room that she is staying in as she fills up with excitement and happiness in having somebody as caring and as kind and as funny as Chuck in her life.
I need to go back to him. I need to be around him right now. He makes me feel complete.
Sarah continues to lay on the bed as she looks up at the ceiling of the room in her continued state of joy for another minute or two, before she eventually moves to stand up once more and she walks out of the bedroom she is staying in and she heads along the hallway for a brief moment before arriving at the door to Molly's bedroom. Sarah pauses at the doorway as she begins to watch on from the doorway as her mother tucks in her sister and the smile already formed on her face from talking to her husband grows even wider as she experiences another heart warming moment. Sarah then enters the room and Emma and Molly both turn to look at her as the three of them all rotate their adoring glances between each other.
"Goodnight, Sarah," Molly says drowsily with a tired smile.
Sarah walks up to the bed and kisses Molly's forehead. "Goodnight, Molly," Sarah says affectionately. "Chuck also told me to tell his favorite person goodnight. I'm kind of jealous about that but don't tell him because I don't want him to know it hurts me."
The two grown women and the very young woman all then begin to laugh at Sarah's words.
"I will keep your secret, Sarah. Won't tell him," Molly mumbles drowsily.
"Thank you," Sarah replies with a bright smile as she rubs her sister's arm.
Sarah and Emma then begin to depart Molly's room and on closing the door, the mother and daughter turn to face each other.
"I heard you laughing," Emma reveals adoringly with a heartfelt smile to her daughter.
A smile forms on Sarah's face on hearing her mother's revelation. "I like him, Mom. I like him a lot. I can see how I fell in love with and married him," Sarah admits to her mother.
A loving smile forms on Emma's face on hearing her daughter's admissions. "That's good, sweetheart."
Sarah continues on in her continued state of joy. "There's just something about him. I became very good at reading people in the CIA and with him I just feel something. He's different," she declares.
Emma's loving smile continues on hearing her daughter's latest admissions.
"He is, sweetheart. Chuck is unlike any other man that I have ever met. I hope my advice means something to you sweetheart," she says warmly.
Sarah nods her head as the two women walk into the living area and they move to sit down on the sofa together. "It does, Mom. It means everything to me. You are the only real person in my life that can offer me sensible advice about my memory loss and the crisis that it has caused for me. I don't have anybody in my life who cares about me, other than you and Chuck. But I can't remember him right now and I had to keep away from you to protect you but I need you right now, more than I ever have," she admits as she completely exposes herself to the woman who gave birth to her.
Emma rubs her daughter's arm affectionately.
"And I am here for you sweetheart and I always will be. I have a lot to make up for, for what I never gave you in your childhood," Emma says as she starts to fill up with shame.
"Mom, it's ok," Sarah protests warmly.
"No darling, it's not. I could have been a better mother to you," Emma says and she smiles shamefully at her daughter. "And that's exactly what I'm doing now. I am being a good mother and I'm telling my daughter to go back to her husband who loves, idolizes, cherishes and worships the ground that she walks on. Chuck will never hurt you. Trust him."
Sarah breathes out a long, deep sigh over the issues that her health condition are causing her right now. "It's not that I don't trust him, Mom. It's just..." she pauses. "I'm a stranger to him. It's not fair on him for me to go back to him and not be able to remember him. He needs a wife who can remember him."
Emma starts to shake her head in disagreement with her daughter's words. "It is fair, darling. He is your husband. He took on the responsibility of looking after and caring for you when he married you. In sickness and in health and you are very sick right now and you need your husband's help to get better."
Sarah continues to breathe in deeply as she sits and gazes at her mother and she listens to her advice.
"Sarah, I can't make you go back to him. I can only tell you to. It's your decision sweetheart and I won't push you as much as I want you to."
"Thank you, Mom," Sarah smiles lovingly as they move to embrace together…
Two days since the beach...
Sarah has now been inside her mother's home for two nights and she is midway through her third day with her mother and her sister. Molly and Emma are presently sitting on the floor and they are playing together with Molly's stuffed dog Rex and Sarah is sitting on a chair and she is smiling adoringly as she observes her mother and Molly playing together when a memory hits her...
~~~ Chuck and Molly were sitting on the floor together laughing and playing with Molly's stuffed dog. Sarah was staring lovingly at her husband as she watched him play with her adopted sister and Chuck turned his glance away from Molly to make eye contact with his wife and they gaze adoringly at each other. He's going to be such a great father to our children. ~~~
"Oh my god!" Sarah gasps out as she flings a hand to her mouth as the huge memory hits and takes effect on her and she enters into a state of shock on recalling what she remembers saying to herself at the time of this memory taking place.
Emma snaps her gaze onto her older daughter on hearing her outburst and she witnesses the look of shock and emotion now present on her daughter's face that was not there just a few moments ago.
"What is it sweetheart?" Emma asks worriedly as she glances up at where her older daughter is sitting who is now looking like an emotional train-wreck.
"Mom, I think I've just had a memory! I'm not sure!" Sarah exclaims in a state of panic caused from the revelations of the memory that she just had.
"Describe it to me, sweetheart," Emma says calmly as she gazes at her daughter.
"I was inside Chu," Sarah pauses. "our apartment and Chuck was playing with Molly on the floor?" she asks.
On hearing Sarah's description, A radiant smile lights up on both Emma and Molly's faces. "I remember that! Chuck was playing with Rex and me!" Molly exclaims happily as she recalls the happy memory she spent together with Chuck inside Chuck and Sarah's home.
"Yes he was, sweetheart," Emma says affectionately as she rotates her glance between her two daughters.
On hearing the revelations of her two family members, a massive smile forms on Sarah's face and tears begin to leave her eyes as she vividly continues to recall only her second memory that she can remember of her husband.
Emma moves to stand up off the floor and she walks over to her daughter who also stands up from her chair and the two women move to embrace together.
"Sweetheart, what's wrong? It's not a sad memory," Emma says comfortingly to her daughter.
"I know, Mom. I can feel it. I can feel the emotion I felt at that moment when I was looking at him playing with Molly. I was standing with you, wasn't I?" Sarah asks.
Emma nods her head. "You were. Do you remember anything else?"
Sarah strains her mind to think back to the memory that has just flashed before her.
"I remember looking at him playing with Molly and I was thinking what a great dad he would be. Mom, you're right. You told me the way I looked at him and I can feel it. I can picture myself looking at him right now as he played with her. How could I forget something as powerful as this, Mom?" Sarah asks as she breaks up and cries into her mother's arms.
Emma hugs her sick daughter tighter.
"Don't cry, Sarah," Molly says comfortingly as she walks up and joins her mother and sister.
"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I don't know what's wrong with me," Sarah says as she breathes out a deep emotional sigh as she wipes her eyes and she looks adoringly at her sister.
"Nothing is wrong with you, darling. You are feeling his love again once more," Emma says as she soothingly rubs her older daughter's arms inside the embrace with her. "And it's not a bad thing, is it Molly?"
Sarah watches as Molly strongly shakes her head sideways with a loving smile. "No. Chuck is very nice and kind," Molly declares affectionately.
A radiant smile forms on Sarah's face on hearing her much, much younger sister's words to her. "You really like Chuck, don't you?" Sarah asks lovingly as tears continue to leave her eyes over experiencing her powerful memory and the revelations that came with it.
"Yes. He's so nice and funny and Morgan too," Molly says as she begins to laugh.
Sarah smiles at Molly as her emotions overwhelm her and she breathes out another deep audible sigh as this moment that she has just recalled is too overpowering and intense for her to deal with.
Sarah then changes her glance onto her mother, and the two women smile affectionately at each other from their water filled eyes...
Later That Night
Sarah is presently inside of the bedroom that she is staying at in her mother's home and she is sitting on the bed for privacy once more and she has just connected a telephone communication with Chuck.
Sarah then warmly greets her husband. "Hi, Chuck."
"Hey, Sarah. I have to admit, I've kind of been waiting in bated anticipation for you to call me all night."
Chuck's admission causes a titanic smile to form from Sarah's mouth.
"Well then in that case, then I'm sorry to have kept you waiting so long," she says in an affectionate tone.
"Heh," he laughs into the conversation causing Sarah to laugh on hearing his chuckle as she begins to imagine his grin just like on the beach when he made that sound just a few days ago.
"I had a memory today, Chuck," Sarah excitedly informs her husband.
"Oh yeah?" he asks and she can hear the anticipation in her husband's tone.
"You were playing with Molly and her stuffed dog Rex," she declares as she smiles lovingly at the ceiling.
"Oh yeah, I remember that! That is one moment I'll never forget," he declares happily.
On hearing her husband's words even though they were meant in a completely different context, Sarah turns emotional and she begins to emit small quiet whimpers into the phone and her face begins to well up.
Hearing his wife's distress, Chuck then begins to speak immediately. "Oh Sarah, I'm so sorry! I wasn't trying to joke or say anything malicious. I didn't think about my words carefully," he says deeply remorseful.
"Chuck, it's ok," Sarah pauses to sniffle her nose. "I know you didn't mean anything by it. Please finish what you were saying," she implores him.
Chuck breathes out a deep sigh into the phone conversation and he takes a moment to plan his response more carefully this time. "I met your mom and Molly for the first time, Sarah. And it will live with me for the rest of my life. It was one of the happiest days of my life."
"How could I forget that day and other days and moments just like this, Chuck?" Sarah asks depressively with a deep frown of frustration now on her face caused from her memory loss.
"Sarah, you didn't forget them. It was taken forcibly from you. And you're remembering things. You have had two vivid memories already. And you've remembered quite a few smaller details that we've already covered such as the bell, the computer virus and the other things you've remembered."
I need to come back to you. I need to be with you when I am remembering these vivid memories of us being together. These flashbacks should be recalled and shared together. I'm not being fair on you by telling you about them over the phone and being unable to see the look of happiness on your face when I tell you I remember things about us.
"Tell me about your day, Chuck," she says in an attempt to perk up her depressive mood.
"Sarah, I'm a nerdy guy are you sure you want to hear about my day?" he jokes.
"Yes," Sarah responds instantly with conviction.
"Heh," he laughs briefly. "Ok. Well I kind of went to work today hoping to be productive, and I was. But it lasted for all but ten minutes until Morgan distracted me by telling me he was gonna beat my record on some video game. Naturally I was offended and had a reputation to protect so we ended up spending half of the day competing at video games. He's a bad influence on me. Heh."
On hearing her husband's words, Sarah starts to laugh deeply. Thank you, Chuck. This is exactly what I needed.
"Kind of lame, huh?" Chuck asks.
"My day wasn't that much brighter either, Chuck. In fact, it was more plain than yours," she admits.
"It's better than being shot at though huh?" he jokes.
Sarah nods her head strongly in agreement with her husband's words. "Absolutely. So who won, by the way?" she inquires with a smirk. I married such a geek.
"Why me of course. I always win. Unless I'm playing against Molly or kids. Have to let them win to build up their confidence," he chuckles causing Sarah to laugh at her husband's words once more.
He really will be a good father to his children.
"Do you want to say goodnight to Molly?" Sarah then offers her husband.
"Oh I see how it is. Passing the nerd off to someone else, huh?" he jokes with a chuckle.
On hearing her husband's response, Sarah begins to snort with laughter.
"You know, a spy would never announce her intentions," she says flirtatiously.
"You don't need to. I'm onto you, Sarah, I know your game," he says confidently.
Sarah's laughter intensifies further on hearing her husband's latest response to her.
"You're lucky I'm not with you right now or I'd kick your ass for these accusations," she says with a massive smile now present on her face.
"You've done that often enough. I'm quite surprised I have an ass left to be frank," he jokes.
Sarah's laughter now enters into a hysterical state for the next minute.
"I'm dying here, Chuck. You've killed me," Sarah says on recovering enough to talk.
"Well I did warn you the other day there are many ways in which to die," he jokes once more.
"So this was your plan all along?" she asks mid laughter.
"A spy would never announce his intentions, Sarah." he jokes once more.
"Oh you're going to get it when I see you," she says as she moves to lay back on her bed while emitting a huge smile of happiness.
"What if I flee and emigrate to Australia before you come back?" he retorts.
"There is nowhere you can run and hide from me," she declares.
"Ok, now I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight in fear of being assassinated." he jokes.
Sarah smirks on hearing his response. "It sounds like you need a protector," she says flirtatiously.
"Are you for hire?" he replies in a flirtatious tone of his own.
A wide smile forms on Sarah's face. "Maybe." she quirks.
"Great! When can you start? I have a blonde Valkyrie named Sarah making threats against me and I need immediate protection," he jokes.
Sarah frowns her eyebrows as she doesn't catch his reference. "What's a Valkyrie?"
She hears her husband chuckle into the phone briefly. "A warrior goddess from Norse mythology," he then informs her.
A radiant smile forms from Sarah's mouth once more.
"Chuck, as much as I'm loving this conversation with you, I really must interrupt it before it's too late and Molly heads to sleep. Do you want to talk to her?" she asks softly.
"Of course!" he responds instantly without hesitation.
Sarah smiles once more. Her mouth is actually hurting from smiling so much. Her husband makes her feel so happy even if she can't remember the slightest of things about him.
Sarah starts to stand up once more from where she had been sitting for however long she's been talking to her husband. "Ok. I'll have to put you on hold for a moment while I go and check on her, ok?" she asks.
"Ok, Sarah. Take your time. Do you want to talk again after I'm finished saying goodnight to Molly?" he then asks.
A smile forms once more on Sarah's face on hearing his question, which is a telltale sign of what she's thinking inside of her brain at this exact moment. I want to do more than talk with you, Chuck. That flirting exchange has lit a fire inside of me for you.
"I'd like that, Chuck. Putting you on hold now."
"No problem."
Sarah then holds the phone conversation with Chuck and she exits the bedroom and she walks through her mother's home until finding Molly and her mother together. Emma is presently reading her daughter a bedtime book.
"Hey Molly. Do you want to say goodnight to Chuck?" Sarah asks with a warm smile.
"Yes!" Molly screeches excitedly as she stands up from the sofa and she jumps up and down with joy.
Sarah giggles sweetly as she watches her sister enter into extreme happiness, much like how she feels inside herself really when she talks to Chuck.
Molly then rushes over to Sarah and Sarah hands Molly the handheld phone. Molly then holds it awkwardly as it is quite big for a five year old girl but she manages to with difficulty and she presses the button to resume the call.
"Chuck!" Molly screeches excitedly and Sarah watches on intensely with great interest as she fills up with happiness on seeing her adopted sister talking excitedly to her husband.
"I have so much to tell you about my day, Chuck! And I want to hear all about yours too!"
Sarah then shifts her glance to her mother who is rotating her affectionate gaze between her two daughters.
And while Molly continues to talk away to Chuck on the sofa, Sarah and Emma then walk towards the dining area to engage in conversation.
"Mom, I need to tell and ask you something," Sarah says reservedly.
"Sweetheart, you can tell and ask me anything," Emma says affectionately and she strokes her daughter's arm to add emphasis to her invitation.
Sarah breathes out a deep sigh as communicating isn't her easiest of skillsets. Fighting a knife fight in Jakarta was always much easier to Sarah than communicating her emotions. At least before she met Chuck. It's evident that in meeting him, he helped her to open herself up to others.
"Mom, in that memory I had earlier, I was imagining myself starting a family with him," Sarah admits nervously to her mother and she gazes into her mother's eyes.
"I know," Emma responds instantly to her daughter's admission.
Sarah quirks her eyebrows. "I told you?" she asks.
Emma nods her head. "Yes, you did. We have spoken a few times about it actually. The most significant conversation we had was when you thought you were pregnant and you called me and you told me that you hoped that you were but sadly the test came back negative," she admits with a sympathetic smile to her daughter.
Sarah's eyes instantly water and she moves a hand to her heart and she gasps as her heart warms deeply on hearing her mother's blockbuster revelation.
"Then I need to go back to him, Mom. I owe it to him and to myself to give it a chance. I can't just abandon him and walk away from him like I'm good at."
"I agree, sweetheart. He is your husband. You are legally bound to him until divorce. You can't just walk away from him. You need to get to know him once more and you can't do that by being here with us."
"You're right, Mom. I should go back to him right now and give it a chance." she states as her mind enters into a complete state of panic and dread over the happiness she could lose if she doesn't return to him.
"It's too late tonight. Go back to him tomorrow," Emma says with a warm smile.
Sarah nods her head in acceptance and as she attempts to regulate her breathing and restore her composure after her conversation with her mother.
The two adult women then watch Molly excitedly chat away to Chuck for the next few minutes until she closes off and says goodbye and she then walks back to Sarah once more.
"Chuck said goodnight, Mom!" Molly says on arriving at the destination of her mother and sister.
"Tell him I said goodnight to him too, and that I love him," Emma declares warmly to her daughter.
"Mom said goodnight, Chuck! And that she loves you!" Molly screeches happily to her best friend.
Sarah continues to watch the exchange between her mother and sister and Chuck on the phone conversation as her happiness and joy and love inside warms more and more for her family and for her husband.
"He loves you too!" Molly then says to her mother which causes Sarah's joy to peak at an all time high on hearing the latest declaration of a family member.
"He would like to talk to you now, Sarah," Molly says as she extends her arm out and offers Sarah the phone in her hand.
"Thank you, Molly," Sarah says affectionately as she then takes the phone into her hand and raises it up to her face.
"Hi," she greets him affectionately.
"Hi," he responds back to her in kind.
"It sounds like you signed up for more than you could chew," Sarah laughs to her husband.
"What, are you serious? I can chew all night long. That girl is too sweet. I love talking to her," he declares to her in a deeply sincere tone of voice.
A joyful smile forms on Sarah's face once more on hearing her husband's words to her as she also watches on as her mother begins to lead Molly to bed.
"I'm so happy right now, Chuck. I wish you could see my face," she declares affectionately.
"Sarah, I'm so happy and I wish you could see my face too."
Sarah laughs sweetly on hearing his response until the laughter then dies down and a brief silence ensues.
"Chuck?" Sarah says as she breaks the brief silence with her husband.
"Yeah?"
Sarah pauses briefly as she begins to feel more nervous than she can ever remember feeling over the impending question that she is about to ask him. "Can I come back and see if we can work things out and get to know each other once more?"
There is another brief pause in the conversation and Sarah starts to imagine the look on her husband's face right now and the thoughts presently going through his mind. She starts to smile in anticipation of his response to her.
"I'd like that," he then responds to her request.
"Me too," Sarah admits as she starts to clench and play with her toes as her insides continue to scream with love and joy.
"When will you come back?" he asks.
"Tomorrow?" Sarah suggests as she smiles nervously into the phone as if her husband was gazing right at her.
"Yeah. That sounds great," he agrees to her suggestion and she can feel him smiling right back at her.
"I should go and say goodnight to Molly now, Chuck," she then suggests.
"Yeah, you should," he agrees.
"I'll see you soon then?" she says warmly.
"I can't wait. Sleep well, Sarah."
"Thank you. You too, Chuck. Goodnight."
"Goodnight."
Sarah then ends the call with her husband and on ending the call, she breathes out a deep sigh as a massive smile begins to form on her face once more. She has never been more sure of anything in her life. She's going back to him. She might not remember him, but she will fight to remember him. She will not allow the spy life to take a single thing more from her. It has already taken too much. The fightback to regain control of her life starts right here, right now...
AN So then. Sarah's second memory (and a powerful one at that). Powerful loving exchanges between Chuck, Sarah, Emma and Molly. Sarah is returning to Chuck. But will Sarah stay with him? Or will she continue to stay at her hotel room? How will their relationship be on being together once more? Find out, Next Chapter!
I hope you enjoyed today's chapter. And please review on your way out.