I do not own Harry Potter, the Wizarding World, or any canon characters.
Hello everyone. Happy Halloween! I thought everyone deserved an extra treat this week so here's an extra chapter update for you all. I'm sure some people could need one and I hope you have a lovely day and are taking care of yourselves. My best to all of you.
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Side Dishes
26th Course – Feathered Noir
Takes place before the 20th course/chapter, when Lavender and Harry find out about their coming baby.
Morning. Day time. They say crimes happen more at night because it's easier to hide. I don't think so. I think they're easier to miss at night. The dark likes to hide things. Few things can hide from me though. That's because I'm a Private Owl, which is like a Private Eye, except I've got two of them and they're better than most people's. Not bragging, just simple fact.
The problem started like they normally do, first thing when you wake up. Problems are like that, they like to ruin your day and set the tone. Well, I've never met a problem that I couldn't handle. That's because I'm the best. Again, simple fact. Lots of people say it, even owls. All of them aren't wrong, but it doesn't make them right. I say it and I'm right. Just works out that way.
Didn't think it'd be that kind of day though. Woke up in my nest bed, beside my Chick and his Mate. Chick was already out and doing what he does best. He's always been an early riser, puts some owls to shame, let me tell you. I could hear the crackling of the best food in the world in the pan, smell the coffee in the air. Plenty of worst things to wake up to.
At first, things were fine. Went to have my morning nuzzle and got the morning post. By the time I came back, the foxes were up and about. Soy sauce and Sesame, Shoyu and Goma, adorably annoying little things they are. We're fine now. They see me as the leader of the parliament/flock/skulk whatever we are. Which is to say, naturally. Less annoying and way more adorable than their aunt, Azuki. Now she's an annoying bean, let me tell you. Lavender wakes up then and we eat together as a big family. It's nice.
The problem started after that. Chick went to work at My Hearth, Lavender went to the Thread with the seasonings. I wanted a quick post breakfast nap and went back to my bed and that's when I walked into the scene of the crime.
My snacking bacon was gone.
Chick, bless his heart and hands, made me a nice little snacking bacon box to put by my nest. Only he and Lavender can put bacon in and take it out, aside from me of course. But wouldn't you know it, the box was empty!
Empty!
Emptier than a purse of a bad-luck gambler and colder than my arse on a winter's day. Double bad luck and an ill omen.
After spending a moment making sure I wasn't seeing things, or in this case, not seeing bacon where there should be, I knew this crime could not go unpunished and needed a top-notch investigator to figure things out.
Good thing I knew the best one in the business.
Me. Hedwig, Private Owl.
That's who.
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After my post-discovery nap, I got to investigating.
First I checked for fox prints around. And I don't mean a classy dame. I mean literal foxes. Now you might be giving me a bit of an eye and head shake to accuse my fellow parliament/flock/skulk mates but hey, I'm just ruling them out. It's what investigators do.
Fortunately there weren't any. No bits of fur either. That was good. I'd feel bad kicking their tails for a crime they didn't commit. That wouldn't be professional.
There weren't any other clues either that I could find. No traces of other people, not that there would be many sneaking around Chick's bedroom without his and Lavender's permission. Not to say that there aren't any of course, but not many. Still, no clues to be found in that regard.
A swift flap around the home showed no obvious signs of intruders. Though I did dive down when something caught my eye. It was a bit of grey fur and I knew it was Sunny's. Now that cat might be tempted to filch from me, but only because I do it to her. We're friends like that. I didn't think it was her though. She doesn't like bacon by itself.
Sometimes I wonder why we're friends.
I tidied up a bit as I searched because I'm a good owl and like a tidy nest. The only thing that I like that isn't tidy is Chick's hair. It's part of his charm.
I love my Chick.
After more searching, nothing was coming up. No clues. No evidence save for my sadly empty box. No suspects.
Time to go find some.
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"Hi Hedwig," Lavender smiled as Hedwig swooped into the Needy Thread. She tilted her head a little when Hedwig landed on her shoulder. "Everything okay?" she asked, smiling when Hedwig bobbed her head. "Okay, just wanted to make sure. You look a little distracted. Does Harry need something?"
Hedwig shook her head and looked around the store slowly before nibbling on Lavender's hair. She then hopped onto the table in front of Lavender and hooted, bobbing her head and patting it with her wing.
"Oh you want a cap or a hat? What are you feeling today?" Lavender smiled. She walked towards the wall of pet accessories the store sold. Collars, jumpers, hats, all sorts of things were on display. At the front was a model of a cat and an owl and the workers routinely changed the things the models wore to suit their mood.
Hedwig peered at the wall carefully and pointed at one with a soft brim and an indented crown that was pinched at the front. The whole of it was dark grey and a light grey ribbon was tied around the base of the crown.
Lavender picked it up and gently settled it on Hedwig's head, tapping it with her wand. "There! Perfect fit and the usual enchantments. There you go!" She laughed at Hedwig's happy nuzzle. "And we have to make sure your model has one too so people know what the hat of the day is." Lavender summoned a second one and settled it carefully on the owl model, perching it at a rakish angle.
She waved back to Hedwig who left the Thread, flapping a wing at her. She laughed again when Hedwig took the time to buzz Parvati as she normally did when she left. She flew around the other woman and pecked her lovingly on the head as she flapped out of the store.
"I'm going to get her one of these days," Parvati complained, shaking a fist at the cackling owl.
"You love it," Lavender smiled.
"I do," Parvati said with a sigh of faux suffering. "She's wearing her investigation hat today."
"Shouldn't be anything too serious," Lavender said comfortably.
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They say clothes make the man, or at least that's what the fancy dresser goblin from Italy says and I happen to agree. You can tell a bird's quality by their feathers and mine are especially fine. But accessories are always nice and fun and get you in the right mindset. Now that I have my thinking and investigating cap on, I'm ready to solve this crime.
I know Lavender isn't the culprit. She's as sweet as her namesake and loves Chick almost as much as I do. She only takes food from me in front of me and does it for fun. It's how we bond.
Parvati, though, that one is a snack stealer. She doesn't do it to me, I taught her a long time ago not to. She still does it though but is like Lavender where she makes it obvious and I of course retaliate because that's our relationship.
Peanut, another of the adorably annoying foxes, won't. Taught her that lesson real quick Cashew, Peanut's sister and the sister of the other two and the last of the quartet, won't. She's the most respectful of the bunch. Of course she gets paired with the other most respectful of the bunch, Padma. Plus she's at the hospital with Padma so she wouldn't come all the way to my home and steal and then leave again. Too much effort for too little benefit. She's practical. As practical as annoying trickster foxes can be anyways.
The other workers at the Thread wouldn't steal either. So aside from me getting my hat, there's no reward here. That's fine. Wasn't assuming any anyways. And now well hatted, I'm ready to keep on investigating. Which means My Hearth.
Love this place. Sometimes I forget how it used to be. Used to be cold and empty. Old Grumpledore being the bartender being a sour grump. He's softened a lot since then. Chick has that way with people. Ariana is hilarious though and I love how they both can get under Old Man's skin.
My Hearth is so much better now though. The wood shines. The smells are wonderful. The tables are clean and well used. The kitchen is bright and shiny and full of good food and people and of course-Hi Chick!
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"Hi Hedwig," Harry greeted as Hedwig swooped into the kitchen, barking a greeting. He kissed her back after she bonked her head against his. "Oh you're wearing your detective hat. Everything okay?" he asked with concern.
He smiled as she nodded and nuzzled him lovingly. "That's good. Let me know if I can help with anything."
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I love my boy. He's the sweetest. I also know he'd share anything with me, even when he's starving. Which he certainly looked like when we met. Fucking Dursleys! I'd call them sacks of shit but that'd be rude to the sacks and the shit. One day I'll have my vengeance, in this life and the next and the next. I know just the thing too. It helps when you have a buddy that likes to set fires and is damn good at it.
Let's see, let's rule out some more suspects here.
Inky, Willie, and Nillie aren't even worth considering. Good people, those elves. Sweet, funny, love my chick, all good qualities. And great cooks. Not as good as Chick of course but close.
Mirra is good too. She's sweet, likes to cook, admires Chick and who can blame her? Also becoming a good cook and she's very proper. A solid goblin gal. Likes to save me little bites from what she cooks. So I like her.
Chloe is a proper bird and I've seen her transform a bit. It's honestly impressive. Eyes get amber, grows a few feathers, develops talons, you know like a bird does. Also can throw fire! Wish I could do that. I mean I can. I just have to get fire elsewhere first. Anyways, she won't steal from Chick or me either. She gets me shiny things from Paris and other places. We like shiny things. And if you call us magpies, I'll talon you! Magpies have no morals, the greedy things. That and they like shiny things because they're shiny. I have taste, thank you.
Henri and Julia wouldn't do it. They're fine folk. I never understood the displeasure of the French. Sure they can be rude but so can anyone really. And if you're snooty and right, you have a right to be snooty.
Eddie never shuts up. Ever. He's always chatting! Good dancer though and he teaches me dances so he's fine. His only problem is that he can't stop talking. I bet he'd explode if you muzzle him. He's too loud to be a thief so he's safe.
Felicity is fine too. She's a good girl, getting more confident under Chick's tutelage. Which is understandable and expected because he's the best. I vaguely remember her from school before she started working for Chick and didn't really think much of her then. Glad she's here now. Bit clumsy too but not as bad as Pinky.
Then there's Guy. That man can out stone-face a rock. Seriously. I've seen a rock crack first from the pressure. He's a serious cook too, a lot like Chick, but less friendly. Which is fine. Not everyone's friendly. He's not unfriendly which is the important part. Doesn't talk a lot too which is nice for when you need to be near someone and still want some peace and quiet. Talks about Zoe though and that's fair. She's a cute little thing.
I sigh and shake my head. Nope. No suspects here. Which is good because I wasn't expecting any. It'd be a real problem is there was-
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"Hedwig, do you mind doing a lunch delivery?" Harry asked, wrapping a few boxes in cloth and putting them in a cloth bag. "Mr. Bennets' wife and daughter are a little under the weather. Bit of a cold. I made them some food to feel better and to get better soon. No need for payment."
Hedwig flapped over and nodded eagerly, nibbling on his fingers.
"Thanks," Harry smiled. "I'm making family meal now. It's one of your favorites: breakfast sandwiches! Bacon, egg, and cheese." His smile widened as she danced up and down, barking happily. "Fried egg or scrambled today?"
Hedwig looked thoughtful and then shook her head back and forth wildly and rolled her eyes all around.
"Scrambled, got it. Toast or a bagel today?" He smiled as she wiggled her rear in a circle. "Bagel it is. Thanks Hedwig!"
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See what I mean about my boy being the sweetest and the best?! Makes a nice lunch for a good regular's family because they're sick. Gets me to deliver it because I raise spirits when I am seen. AND makes one of my favorites for family meal.
I love my boy.
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I hate to say it, but I'm a little stumped right now.
The rest of the day flew by like I do on a delivery. After delivering the food to the Bennets family, I came back and ate my family meal with the others at My Hearth. I then took a letter out to the Rangers for a supply request, and went by Greengrass shipping to grab a new catalogue for Chick.
By then it was about time for the dinner service and I had to go back to my day job, Owl de Cuisine. It's a good living. I help keep an eye on things, taste test, deliver food, be security, the whole nine feathers. Some nights it's a lot of work. Well it's a lot of work every night but there's work and then there's work. This night I didn't have to kick anyone's face for talking smack or being rude. All the deliveries were on time, no money shorted. No food ran out. A solid day by any measure.
Save that I still had no idea who snitched my snacks.
I chewed on that as I chewed my dinner, a bacon pizza with rocket and different cheeses and garlic. So tasty. Chick, Lavender, and the foxes and I ate at My Hearth and a few others came to eat with us. It was a good time like it always is when others come to visit with Chick.
But here I am now. Moon's out, sun's gone, and my box is empty-
Oh wait, it's not empty anymore. It was empty though-
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"I refilled your box," Harry said smiling down at Hedwig who hooted happily back at him. "I also changed your blanket out in the nest and found this. You must have been really sleepy," Harry smiled, holding out a small piece of a rasher of bacon. "Want me to heat it up for you and you can finish it off?"
Hedwig nodded eagerly, nuzzling him gratefully.
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Huh, would you look at that. The last bit of it was in my blankets.
I vaguely remember dreaming of munching on some bacon. Must have been me in real life, taking a nibble in my sleep. Sleep snacking. Not an unknown thing of course.
Guess it's true what they say. Sometimes the culprit is the one closest to you.
And who's closer to me than me? Besides Chick of course.
Well, case solved then. No one stole from me. I can't steal from myself. I took what was already mine, so this was a perfect crime, a victimless one.
Well, no one's perfect.
Except for me of course. I committed the pseudo-crime, no one was hurt, and I caught myself in the end.
So I'm perfect.
Hedwig Jane Potter, Private Owl.
I can go to sleep knowing that the guilty one is punished, the innocent one got justice, and most importantly, I got more bacon.
Case closed.
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Hufflepuffzd96 - Glad you enjoyed.
HoneyBear84 - Thank you.
TheSphynx - Thank you, glad you liked it.
Wentley - I do like builder stories where he makes a community or an island or what have. I liked to imagine logistics sometimes.
odonellzoo99 - Mmhmm. It didn't make sense for him to make his own village in this case, with how much this one loves the school and Hogsmeade, so it felt right having him have his home right in Hogsmeade. The 'shut your yap' bit was one of my favorites in the whole chapter too. Imagining Ragnok say that.
Waiting Companion - Thanks.
Shroudy9 - Thank you.
alix33 - Them dancing together is one of my favorite ways to close a course.
Hands Off MY Wolfie - Magic must make moving so much easier. Moving is so hard. Thanks for reading.
DOOOOOM Lord of Waffles - I thought it was strange since you kept saying you wanted to see Darkwell, but didn't mention anything about it. Glad you saw it in the end. Honestly, Harry is probably a proper part of the Clan. It just hasn't come up technically yet.