Heaven Knows Everyone Is Miserable Now

Chapter 3: A Flicker Of Light

Shinpachi had started writing a journal after he had found an empty notebook among what was left of Katsura's belongings. It wasn't difficult to understand how the company of his own words gave him the relief and solace his real life companions had seized for themselves or rather lost entirely, trading speech for grunts, kind words for silence. Communication was sparse and actions spoke louder. The four of them carried on because the common goal of surviving united them. But the question had begun to haunt them, until when?

Hijikata finished scraping his disposable cup of instant soup and wiped his mouth. Shinpachi scribbled in his journal across the table. At the top of the page it read Day 21. Day twenty-one since they had arrived at Katsura's house. Day twenty-one since Gintoki had stuck a blade inside his friend's skull and put an end to the madness of rot. Hijikata hadn't slept that night. Kagura and Shinpachi's snores had induced his body to do the same and he was tired enough too, but the adrenaline had kept his mind awake as had the sounds coming from outside the house, for once not the gnarls and heavy breathing of mindless living corpses but the steady sound of shovel meeting ground. Hijikata didn't know where Gintoki had found the shovel. He had spent the whole night digging, boring through hard ground and ragged chunks of rock which he'd lugged out of the hole and tossed at its feet. Poorly fed and without knowing a good night's sleep since the world had ended, driven by simple grief. Hijikata had thought about helping him more than once, curled into himself, distraught, yet every time he did his own feelings had stopped him. Feelings which told him to leave the man alone like he wished he had been after lighting his last cigarette.

So long ago it seemed. The burning. Hijikata could swear he saw her sometimes when he turned around or looked over his shoulder. His heart squeezed and shrunk another size.

"Ah, they are here." Shinpachi's monotonous voice accompanied the sound of loud thuds against metal. Hijikata groaned.

"I told her not to do that."

Kagura's habit of climbing over the parked car that served as gate to Katsura's house raged on. The more they scolded her the more she did it. She was an adept of big crashing sounds despite knowing them to be her deadly enemy. She said they made her feel alive. Hijikata couldn't condemn her much after that.

"How hard can it be to go around? Are you visually impaired too?"

Gintoki's complaint met a shrug of shoulders. Kagura picked up her pace and ran inside the house. She appeared in front of Shinpachi and Hijikata wearing something akin to a smile.

Shinpachi dropped his pen.

"What happened?"

"Look what we found." she dropped her bag on the breakfast table knocking over Hijikata's empty cup and pulled out two leather cases. One big, one small.

"What the hell, Kagura-chan?"

Hijikata stared quietly at the assortment of blades Kagura had placed on the table. Much like Katsura's house, the town had been combed clean of weapons and goods before they had arrived. Only lifeless bodies and mementos had stayed behind, worthless and cumbersome unlike the leather roll-up cases filled with blades.

"I think we found the barber's house. Whoever they were, they had these hidden under a mat. Floor sounded hollow all of a sudden and then, bam! There they were."

Kagura slid a hand over the leather roll caressing the blades.

"These are great and all but the one that really caught my eye was this one," she unfolded the smaller case and pulled out a butterfly knife in mint condition "Isn't it cool?" she flipped it open going for a twirl, "You can have the othe- Ow!"

Hijikata caught her by the wrist and the butterfly knife dropped to the floor, tip first.

"I could have lost my fingers, asshole!"

"Exactly." Hijikata replied. He bent down to pick the butterfly knife, plucked it out of the wooden board and handed it back to her, "That's not a toy."

"I know!"

She grabbed it blushing and put it back in her bag.

"I don't know who she gets this blade infatuation from." Gintoki drawled. The way he said it made Hijikata twitch. He stood by the door, shoulder leaning against the frame.

"And you, what did you get?" Shinpachi's question rang timely, matching the frown on Hijikata's face.

"Water," Gintoki mumbled, "Y'all should be grateful."

"No food? So we're gonna have to cut dinner again?"

"There's only so much we can find in a town pillaged twenty times over." Gintoki said defensively.

"And there's only so much food we can cut! Hijikata-san and I caught a fish in the river the other day!" Shinpachi spat back.

"And I said that was luck."

"No, it wasn't luck."

"Are you telling me to try harder?"

"Yes! That or leaving!"

Gintoki stuck out his chin and nodded and the conversation ended. Shinpachi went back to his journal, Kagura left the room to practice tricks with her new knife and Gintoki disappeared to the back of the house to ponder the meaning of the words 'try harder'. Leaving hadn't been an option since he had shoveled the last pile of dirt over Katsura's grave.

Hijikata looked over at the big blade case and scratched his cheek, stubble pricking his fingers.

"Are there any mirrors left around here?"

The answer was a negative. The bathroom mirror was smashed to bits and the largest pieces were too jagged, already brushed off to a dusty corner. No matter. Hijikata had what he needed for a shave. A bar of soap, a bowl of water, the sun shining and a case full of professional old school razor blades.

He went by the kitchen to fetch the stool he had used to pull down Katsura's body from the tree and walked to the backyard. The sky was a murky shade of blue with the sun pinned right in the middle.

"Hey, come here."

Gintoki was laying down somewhere among the mass of bushes that had grown free of care. Lately he had sought refuge there when it wasn't his turn to do any of the chores or go out on runs. Hijikata wondered if one day he would just blend in permanently. The crossed leg with the foot peeking out would become part of the undergrowth and he would sink into the earth to join the buried.

"I know you heard me." Hijikata said putting down the stool. He placed the bowl and the blade case on the small steps that led from the backdoor. The sounds got Gintoki's attention and he raised his head.

"What's this now?"

"I said come here."

Gintoki sighed and got up with a scowl.

"Sit down."

Gintoki's frown deepened.

"Have it your way." Hijikata muttered and sat down on the stool himself.

While he splashed water on his face and scrubbed it with soap, Gintoki watched him in silence, his angry expression slowly dwindling away. It was only when Hijikata finished soaping and handed him a razor that Gintoki's pursed lips turned into a faint smile.

"Do you mind?" Hijikata asked, meeting a charged silence. He was looking at the sky, completely unaware of Gintoki's expression.

"Just do it already."

"I told you I don't like to be bossed around."

Hijikata was glad his cheeks were covered in soap because he felt them heat up at Gintoki's teasing tone. He tried to will the feeling away and settle comfortably in his seat, but he soon regretted the whole shaving idea. Gintoki sat on the doorsteps behind him, close enough that his chest touched Hijikata's back. He placed his left hand on Hijikata's neck and tilted back his chin. The realization dawned on Hijikata he hadn't thought his plan through.

"Don't move." Gintoki's breath grazed the tip of Hijikata's nose. Hijikata swallowed dry, Adam's apple bobbing up and down. The sharp cold edge of the razor touched the tender skin under his jaw.

"If you cut me I'll scalp you." Hijikata hissed.

"I would like to see you try," Gintoki huffed, "Now shush."

Hijikata opened his mouth to retort but Gintoki leaned closer, unconsciously or not, eyes focused on the tip of the razor. Hijikata remained silent, eyelids shut, roused at each firm stroke of blade across damp skin, each press of fingers on his temples, the shifting of feet. A cold shadow soon replaced the anchoring pulse at his back.

"Looks pretty good if you ask me." Gintoki exclaimed, standing over Hijikata and appraising his work.

Hijikata leaned forward on the stool and felt his cheeks.

"Feels alright."

"I should charge you. That's how good I am."

"Shut up," Hijikata snorted, "I'll pay you in kind." he stood up ready to change seats but Gintoki didn't move. He kept his gaze locked on Hijikata, mellow and warm like the cloudy midday sun.

"Why are you still here?"

The question was as puzzling as his look. Hijikata wondered if it was a trick question. He had an arsenal of negatives ready for any occasion but never a solid explanation. He fidgeted with the wet collar of his shirt attempting to sound dismissive.

"What do you mean?"

Gintoki smiled a real smile, an answer in itself, though Hijikata was too blinded by grief and circumstance to see it. Gintoki brushed shoulders as he moved to sit back on the doorstep. Expression unreadable.

"Nothing, forget it."

"What's going on? Are you having fun without me?" Kagura sounded betrayed. She appeared by the door just behind Gintoki and trapped his head between her calves, "Are you?"

"Dependsonyour definition offun." Gintoki uttered, struggling against her grip.

"Just shaving." Hijikata replied.

Kagura's eyes widened with glee.

"Oh, you're using the razor blades we found? That's great! Do you think you can cut my hair?" she pushed Gintoki off the steps and sat down on the stool, "I can't look at my split ends anymore. I mean, I can't even braid this evil nest anymore." she picked at her hair with exaggerated disgust.

"I have never cut hair before."

"It's alright, Toshi. Leave it to the pro." Gintoki replied. He returned to his seat behind the stool and grabbed a hold of Kagura's hair.

"One inch wrong and it's goodbye dirty perm." Kagura warned. She shoved a hand inside her jacket and took out her butterfly knife.

"What's with you two and threats today? I swear I won't leave you bald."

"You better not!"

"Don't know that you'll be able to do much without a comb." Hijikata pointed out. A glum expression took over both Gintoki and Kagura's faces.

"I think I have a hairbrush stashed in my pack. I'll be right back!" Kagura blurted out. She shot up like an arrow and disappeared inside the house.

Gintoki let out a sigh of relief yet his expression betrayed impatience. Hijikata stared wordlessly at him again, navigating through a simpler level of loss. He tried to keep things light and practical in dread of another sudden turn of mood, another question impossible to answer.

"Were you a hairdresser before?"

"Not really," Gintoki replied, "But I used to cut her hair when her mom was too sick to take care of it."

Hijikata nodded, regretting as always to talk about the way things were before. The real world. Only it wasn't so real anymore. A memory.

A hand caught Hijikata's own, bidding his attention.

"So are you gonna give me a shave or what?"

Gintoki's thumb brushed against the cold band around Hijikata's finger.

"Yeah."

The weather had taken a turn for the worse. At night clouds hid the moon and without bright city lights to reflect on them the world seemed not only dark but closed in on itself. Hijikata left his sleeping mat to relieve Shinpachi at the gate. The kid sat inside the car-gate doing watch. Hijikata knocked softly at the window.

"It's time."

Shinpachi looked up. His voice came muffled from inside.

"I'm not tired, I can stay another couple of hours."

Hijikata sighed. He went around the car and got in the front passenger seat deaf to Shinpachi's pleas.

"I'm okay, really! You can go back to sleep. We all need rest the way we're going." the last part came as a whisper. Hijikata rubbed his eyes in exasperation.

"If you don't want to go, fine. But I'm not going anywhere." Hijikata said.

Shinpachi fell silent, hands clutching the steering wheel.

"Okay."

Hijikata looked ahead at the immense darkness of the village. Silent and dead. There was no use to watches while they stayed in that town, yet an irrational life-preserving fear kept them at it. The village remained as dead and devoid of movement as it had the first day they had arrived and met a welcome committee of lifeless bodies at the foot of the hill. The stench and the quiet seemed to keep the hungry undead away. Throughout their stay, Katsura's corpse had been the only one they had put an end to. Nothing approached the village and nothing crept out of the earth to leave it. Neither did they. It was as if they were stuck in time. Not in the past moving on with their normal lives, nor in the present, deep in the fight. Certainly not in the future.

Before the muddled shapes and black silhouettes of the town, Shinpachi's breaths sounded comforting. Hijikata shifted in his seat. Something underneath him poked his thigh. He groped for it and found Shinpachi's journal.

"Ah, sorry! I forgot it was there." Shinpachi apologized and reached for the notebook.

"Sorry, I didn't see it," Hijikata handed it back, "Does it help?"

Shinpachi was quiet for a moment, staring at the cover.

"I don't know. I guess it does. It makes things clearer."

"That's good," Hijikata said, "What's clear to you now?"

"It's clear that we can't stay here for much longer. Dying of starvation and boredom might be a million times worse than being eaten alive."

Hijikata huffed a noncommittal reply. The kid wasn't completely wrong.

"I know Katsu-, well his death," Shinpachi skipped over Katsura's name, still finding it hard to say, "I know his death was horrible and it hit Gin-san hard, but we can't stay here forever. He wouldn't want us to."

Hijikata heard him with pious gravity, yearning for a smoke.

"Besides, I haven't lost faith yet," Shinpachi said, eyes looking down. It was then Hijikata noticed the piece of paper clutched fiercely in Shinpachi's hand, "Don't you wonder too, Hijikata-san? About the people that were with you. Don't you want to see them again?"

Giving a true answer would be giving away too much. Wasting energy on a multitude of words Hijikata wasn't sure he could combine in the right way anymore. Remembering Kondo and Sougo and the old group was too painful. The present distance between them wasn't enough to stop bridging the gap that tied Hijikata's memories of them to Mitsuba's burning corpse.

But he missed them all the same. Kondo's arm around his shoulder, the hatred in Sougo's eyes which dared the whole world to defy him.

"Of course I do." Hijikata said.

"Then how can you stay silent and do nothing? We should leave, we should…" Shinpachi's hands trembled as he held back his tears.

"Because they have people to take care of. They know where to go." Hijikata said, "You know, being with them taught me one thing," he looked back at the duffel bag neatly packed and hidden behind the driver's seat, "By myself things are much harder, but with the dead roaming about they become impossible."

Shinpachi bit back a sob.

"I'd be dead if you hadn't picked me up off that road." Hijikata said.

Shinpachi nodded fiercely and wiped his wet nose on his sleeve.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking," he muttered, frustration seeping into his tone, "I'd get bit in a second out there alone, those things would make mincemeat of me, and I wouldn't even be particularly tasty or anything, skinny as I am, I would probably not even make a good rotter myself, I'd get impaled or stuck somewhere and spend the rest of my- well, not life, but the rest of my not-being-dead-time moaning and crying, just like I am now. My poor sister! I bet she thinks that of me already."

"Is that her on the picture?" Hijikata asked, gesturing towards the wrinkled piece of paper caught between Shinpachi's fingers.

"Y-yes." Shinpachi stuttered. Hijikata didn't need the absent moonlight to see the light flush over Shinpachi's cheeks, it was palpable. The warmth that came with thoughts of love and hope.

"She left home for work and I never saw her again."

Hijikata uttered a sympathetic reply and both fell into silence again. Minds on what they had left behind in Tokyo. Shinpachi's breathing evened out.

"Thanks for hearing me out, Hijikata-san," Shinpachi said. He placed the photograph of his sister over his notebook and reached into his pockets, rummaging for an item, "I found these the other day and forgot to give them to you." he produced a crumpled pack of cigarettes from the inner pocket of his jacket and quickly tried to smooth the creases.

"Kagura heard you groaning about a smoke the other day and I've seen you playing with your lighter once or twice-"

Hijikata clenched his teeth and shuffled in his seat.

"I know it's a waste."

"No! Uh, I mean, d-don't take it the wrong way, it's a nervous tick, right?" Shinpachi tried to laugh it off to put Hijikata at ease but had little success, "Anyway, please accept this. As thanks."

Hijikata huffed and grabbed the cigarette pack. He immediately took one out and lit it. The tiny flame of the lighter bathed the front seats in a flickering orange light and revealed the soft smile playing on Shinpachi's lips so similar to the one stretched across the features of the girl in the photo. Hijikata's heart stopped. His finger twitched. The flame burned his thumb and he hissed. Darkness enveloped them again.

"Sorry."

He flicked the lighter back on, eager to take another look at the girl.

"Can I see that?"

Shinpachi held the photo close to the light so Hijikata could take a better look.

"Yeah, she's beautiful, isn't she?"

Hijikata didn't answer, though Shinpachi took his silence as agreement.

"I know this girl." Hijikata finally spoke.

"What?"

"I know where she is."

A heavy fog broke out the morning of their departure, sealing the way south. It advanced steadily towards the village, coating the ground with a dense mist that no barrier could stop nor any trained eye navigate through. Nevertheless, postponing was out of the question. The same way Katsura's tragic fate had broken their spirit, learning of Tae's circumstances had given their stagnant lives new meaning.

"You've seen her?" Gintoki's sullen voice had carried immeasurable doubt after Shinpachi had relayed him Hijikata's news. The second Hijikata had stopped speaking Shinpachi had run out of the car to go pounce on Gintoki and disturb his meager attempt at sleep.

"Not me! Hijikata-san! He said she was with his group!"

"Tae?"

"Yeah!"

Kagura, who had been fast asleep in the next room, roused at the noise. She dragged her feet down the hall and appeared with a frown on her face, hand clutching her old bat.

"Is it time?"

"Time for what?" Shinpachi cried out noticing her weapon, "Who wakes up in the middle of the night ready to maul somebody with a bat?! And you even bother asking! What do you think we are, special forces!?"

"Gin-chan, shut him up or I will." Kagura moaned, rubbing her eyes.

"Wait up, Kagura, I think he was trying to say something important."

"More important than my sleep?"

"Yes! More important than your sleep!" Shinpachi repeated, "Hijikata-san has seen big sis'!"

Kagura's eyes widened, she loosened her grip and her bat fell to the floor.

"He has?"

"She was with them in one of those cars. She is with his group!"

Hijikata had entered the room at that moment. His eyes met Gintoki's and he felt unusually defensive.

"My old group." the words came out of his mouth tiny and inaudible. He didn't break eye contact and the glint in Gintoki's eyes told him he hadn't missed a syllable. Shinpachi and Kagura hugged amid joyous cries. Hijikata reigned in his inadequacy, unable to join in, though the happiness bursting from the kids found its way to the most vulnerable part of his heart. He smiled.

Gintoki's next words proceeded to put their lives in motion again.

"When do we leave?"

Shinpachi and Kagura loaded the rest of their gear into the trunk of the car. The four of them had tidied up Katsura's place and packed their things during the night, foreseeing no hindrance to their plans, not even when they had stepped out early in the morning to get the car running and met the creeping fog hanging on the horizon. They were leaving, they were going to find Tae.

Hijikata finished checking the car's fuel tank and reached for his cigarettes. The occasion deserved a smoke. He lit one cigarette, acknowledged Shinpachi's beaming smile and walked back towards the house. Behind the big maple tree in a clear stretch of garden he found Gintoki. He was crouched before a flat mound of soil. Katsura's grave. It didn't look as barren and desolate as it did the day Hijikata had seen it for the first time, brown and damp. Timid green blades of grass had spurt from the revolved soil and covered the grave in a velvet lush. Gintoki replaced the withered flowers Kagura had placed two weeks before with a crumpled map tore at the seams and smeared with dirt. The map Katsura had sent him.

"Load of good this did me." Gintoki spat.

Hijikata stopped by his side examining the grave.

"Maybe you just haven't figured it out yet."

"You're being really disrespectful, you know that?" Gintoki said staring at Hijikata as he took a long drag on his cigarette.

"Oh, yeah." Hijikata stepped back, clearing the air with his free hand, but Gintoki called him back.

"Do you have one to spare?"

Hijikata looked at him surprised then affronted.

"No." he replied with a big exhale. Then, before Gintoki could produce the slightest pout, Hijikata grabbed the butt of his cigarette and turned it around with deft fingers, "Here."

Gintoki took it without a word, eyes never leaving Hijikata who gazed down solemn at Katsura's grave.

"Maybe you're right," Gintoki said after a pause, a thin column of smoke blew from his lips, "Maybe I'll figure it out later. Right now the only good thing this map has brought me to is you."

They drove as far from the fog as they could. It was the long way around to the government shelter Hijikata knew Kondo and the others were trying to reach, or had already reached, but everyone had agreed they'd rather take longer than risk it in the fog or spend another day starving in that mute village. For better or worse they were back on track, scavenging abandoned houses for food and empty cars for fuel. The journey was slow. After the unsettling peace and quiet of Katsura's nest in the clouds their instincts were forced to relearn the swiftness and precision required to survive. Nobody except Kagura missed getting reacquainted with the smushed brains of decaying bodies, Shinpachi in particular would have avoided them completely if those same bodies didn't crave the taste of his own warm flesh.

"It's eat or be eaten!" Kagura exclaimed in a sing-a-long voice which Shinpachi couldn't help reproach.

"You mean kill or be killed."

"Pachi, if all they wanted was to kill us it wouldn't be this easy." Kagura reasoned. She pulled out her butterfly knife from the hairy skull of a rotter and wiped it clean on its foul shirt.

"You're getting pretty handy with that." Hijikata noted.

Kagura scrunched up her nose, fighting back a cocky smile.

"I'm still getting used to it," she said nonchalantly. Gintoki rolled his eyes, "Oi, you! I saw that!"

"Saw what?"

"You rolling your eyes at me!"

"Oh, here we go." Shinpachi sighed.

"I had something in my eye."

"Was it my knife? Cause I can make it happen!"

"No, it was a pine cone. There was a literal pine cone in my eye. Can't you see all these pine trees surrounding us?"

"I'll shove a pine cone right up your a-"

"Shut up." Hijikata cut through their argument with urgency. Kagura and Gintoki turned a pair of hard stares on him but understood Hijikata's call for silence when he raised a finger to his lips and pulled out his knife. Beside Hijikata, Shinpachi gestured towards the trees. The four of them crouched by the car.

"Listen."

A chorus of distant growls echoed through the sparse stretch of pine forest.

"Can you see them?" Kagura asked.

"No, we need to draw nearer." Hijikata replied.

"I'll go."

Without giving anyone a chance to object, Gintoki sprung to action. He left their position behind the car and raced through the forest until he reached its edge about two hundred feet away. Kagura fought against Shinpachi's grip and ran after him, cursing his name. She met him already on his way back, pine needles stuck in his hair.

"You perm-freak, don't do that to us again!" she muttered angrily.

Gintoki patted her head and ushered both of them back to the car.

"It's not safe here, there's a-" he lost his train of thought as they reached the car and found the spot deserted, "Where are they?"

"They were right here when I left." Kagura replied anxiously, hands frozen at her sides.

Gintoki looked down at the coal-tar road, heart beating fast. No clues, no hints, no way to track.

"Fuck."

"Let's check the other side, maybe they saw a creeper."

Gintoki nodded and they ran to the strip of forest on the other side of the road. They could hear shuffling feet in the distance though the sounds mixed with their own footsteps as they crunched the clusters of pine needles that covered the ground.

"'Pachi! Toshi!"

Kagura called their names in hushed screams unable to move on silently, frantic for an outlet to her panic. Gintoki pulled her along deeper into the forest, angling for the source of sound. There was no end to this side of the forest, it just kept going tighter and tighter, the spindly branches of the pine trees intertwined high above their heads and scraped against each other. The snapping noises hit Gintoki and Kagura like bullets.

"Paachi!"

"Hey, I think I saw something."

A silhouette moved behind a tree trunk ten feet away. Kagura stilled beside Gintoki and both waited for the figure to emerge again.

"It's just a rotter." Kagura said with a big exhale. She walked up to the creeper, landed a kick on its stomach and sent it flying against the nearest tree. The rotter growled and jerked as it tried to get back to its feet but Kagura's knife found the tender flesh behind its ear.

"Watch out!"

Gintoki heard the irregular footsteps just in time to dodge the drooling undead corpse that sprung behind him. He stuck out his foot and the creeper tumbled forward, falling face flat on the ground. Before Gintoki or Kagura could get to his skull Hijikata squashed it with the heel of his boot.

"This is the last one." he said calmly. Shinpachi trailed close behind him with a sheen of sweat across his forehead and bloody blade in hand.

"Where the fuck were you?" Gintoki asked in a fury, stepping over the dead creeper to sputter all over Hijikata's face, "What the hell were you thinking?!"

"I should be the one asking that after you went rushing off on your own. You're the fucking reckless idiot."

"You said we needed to get closer so I did! All you had to do was wait, how hard could thad be, asshole?"

"A group of rotters was gonna surround us by the car if we didn't get rid of them. We took care of it."

"Hijikata-san is right, we-"

"Forget it. This place is no good. There's a fucking horde of them on the other side, I mean hundreds of them." Gintoki said sheathing his knife. The news silenced them. For a moment there was only the creaking of the trees.

"Hundreds?" Shinpachi repeated, mouth ajar.

Gintoki nodded.

"There's a steep slope down to the city on the other side. The horde is gathered there."

"Is it moving?" Hijikata's question seemed too stupid to ask. Gintoki met his eyes and swallowed the dread he found there.

"No, they were quiet, why?"

"Nothing," Hijikata brushed him off, "Let's get back to the car. You're right, we need to get out of here."

The kids concurred and followed him, eager to get out of the forest. Gintoki bit his tongue frustrated. He stayed behind for a minute surveying the scene. He looked at the dead bodies lying on the ground, then at the clear surrounding expanse of pine trees. Something wasn't right and Hijikata had sensed it too.

Gintoki ditched the bodies and joined the kids' slow trek behind Hijikata.

"Did you notice it too, Gin-san?" the concern was clear in Shinpachi's voice, he didn't even dare look Gintoki in the eye.

"Yeah."

"I didn't get it at first. Hijikata-san told me."

"Well, he wasn't a cop for nothing, I guess." Gintoki mumbled.

"Why, what's wrong?" Kagura asked oblivious.

"Those creepers we just killed?" Shinpachi reminded her, "They were dressed like us."

Kagura furrowed her brows in thought, narrowed her eyes, hunched her shoulders. Nothing.

"Wow, you really are that dumb." Shinpachi stated in his most deadpan voice.

"Shut up! You just said two seconds ago you didn't understand it either before Toshi The Cop explained it to you, pea-brain."

"Shut up! I literally just told you!?"

"What Shinpachi means is that those are fresh rotters. They died in this world. They wore protective gear like us, one still had his knife holster. Whoever they were, they died a short while ago."

"Oh, I get it now." Kagura said.

"You can unclench your thought muscles then." Shinpachi pointed out. Kagura sent him a death glare.

"I was only joking, Kagura-chan!"

When they stepped out of the forest Hijikata was kneeled by the car, head stuck under the driving wheel. It always took him a few minutes to hotwire the car.

"Everything all right?" Gintoki asked. Hijikata stood up and dusted his hands clean.

"Sorta," he replied crudely, "The car is dead. The engine must have died or something. I can't fix it."

The kids let out a groan, Shinpachi ran a hand over his head and Kagura crouched down in despair.

"We have to walk?!" she moaned.

"Did you check everything?" Gintoki wondered. Hijikata answered him with a deep frown that welcomed no rebuttals, "Okay, okay, let's get our packs and move out."

"This sucks!"

"You can complain once we get out of here." Gintoki told Kagura. She hissed at him with her arms crossed but soon relented.

"Yeah, thought so." Gintoki snorted. He opened the trunk of the car while the kids grabbed what they had left scattered on the backseat. Hijikata came to help him unload the trunk and Gintoki's heart somersaulted when Hijikata's lips brushed his ear.

"The engine didn't die. Someone cut the wires."