AN: New chapter! :D Wonder what happens here... xD Probably nothing huuuuge or anything.
End of AN!
Master Xehanort strode through the Dark Corridor, crossing into the world of Radiant Garden once more.
It would seem destiny was on his side, as it was not long after he arrived that he witnessed a gaggle of residents, along with the very woman he sought, gathering around the dark-haired one, Skuld, in the town's main square.
The woman who bore his caretaker's appearance, as well as another woman of this world, were both applying powerful Healing magic to Skuld.
"I think she's going to pull through," spoke the Radiant Garden citizen, her green eyes fixed to Skuld. "It's bad, but...not as bad as it could be."
The woman who might be Amaya gave a nod.
Xehanort watched her alone, his mind filtering out all the others.
He watched her stand, watched her attempt to move Skuld toward the castle. But the dark-haired woman refused, quite violently, and the rabble instead seemed to decide to take her to one of the houses ringing the square.
Xehanort watched the scene with annoyance. It was all very dramatic, wasn't it? He needed the woman to separate from the rest, so he could take her. Speak with her somewhere private.
He needed to get to the bottom of this - if there was any possibility...any kernel of truth to his younger self's claims...
An ember of emotion sparked in his Heart.
He crushed it, focusing his mind.
Had he truly been so emotional, so easily misled, as a youth? So naive - weak and susceptible? Well, perhaps he had, given the events involving Luxu and that Master of his, whom had met Xehanort in the Graveyard twice...
All manipulations. All for a purpose. All deception and lies.
And he had indeed fallen for them, never realizing... But he was wiser now, older now.
His younger self may need a bit more of a guiding hand to account for his youthful shortcomings, but Xehanort was confident he could get himself past it. After all, he had grown beyond it naturally, once before...all on his own.
Yes, he supposed he had been expecting rather much from even his own, younger self. These were confusing times, where the battlefield shifted and nothing was certain any longer. He could hardly expect his younger self to navigate it all with perfect clarity and grace. He remembered well his own introspections, doubts, stumblings...and failings of youth. Questioning the ways of the worlds, darkness and light, and all their complications...as well as the complicated Hearts and the emotions therein of the ones who existed upon them. Even his own - or, perhaps, especially his own...
He could allow his younger self some...some leeway in this regard. His Heart was still growing, from the boy he was, into the man he would become.
Shouting voices drifted into the hidden Dark Corridor, catching Xehanort off his guard.
He returned focus to the present, in time to witness the woman with Amaya's face retreating from Skuld, looking rather sorrowful and distraught. But not more so than the dark-haired woman herself, who wore a face of tight, wild fury, her weak body shaking from her place on a large bed.
"Get...OUT! I don't want to see your face again for-" The dark-haired woman stopped in the midst of her raging. "Please just leave me alone for a while..."
Xehanort cursed himself for not paying more attention; he might have been able to actually know what had been said, or done, to cause such a curious display of volatility between the two women. No matter: he could ask his...possible caretaker, himself.
Though, the woman who may have been Amaya did not respond to Skuld in kind; she simply nodded, composed yet sad, and turned to leave the little house.
Xehanort was pleased. This was the break he needed - the moment.
He relocated through the darkness, shifting the invisible exit of his portal to the central square once more, watching the woman stride off across it.
The square only held one or two random, insignificant nobodies. It was, all in all, rather barren.
Save for the one person who might matter...
Xehanort could see no better opportunity.
He manifested the open end of the portal behind the woman precisely, seizing her in telekinetic hold and pulling her backwards - into his physical grasp.
He held to her, shifting them through the Dark Corridor, turning from that world and toward another.
In the darkness, the woman twisted in his grasp - a golden light flashed out -
And they both fell out of the darkness into light.
He landed awkwardly and roughly on cracked dirt, dust and wind breezing across his form.
They had still reached his intended destination.
The Keyblade Graveyard.
Xehanort rose to his feet, his gaze finding the woman - who was already up and on her own. He brushed himself off, composing himself, placing hands behind his back as he inspected her figure.
She was indeed the same as the woman who had seized his younger self a week prior - some younger facade of the old woman he had known in memories of earliest years. She wore quite ordinary clothing, with a modest jacket over top. She looked...
Quite disappointing.
Her brown eyes looked back at him - squarely at his face. Her arms hung at her sides. He watched as some strange emotion burgeoned in her features - then it faded. "Xehanort," she spoke, in simple, calm tones.
"Yes." He looked her up and down again. "And you are, supposedly, the woman who raised me."
She closed her eyes, nodding. Then, she sighed. "I've already been through this with your younger self. I don't think I have the strength to do it again - with you."
"Let us get straight to the point, then: do you claim to be her?"
"I am Amaya, yes," she responded, still so simple, so calm. So factual. So...
"Can you prove that?"
"Can you believe that?" she replied, mirroring his tone and cadence. Her eyes had still not left his. "I could recount childhood memories of ours - I could tell you so many things you never knew - but the choice to believe them or not lies with you. And if I'm going to waste my time speaking so much..." She looked around herself, at a pile of broken Keyblades nearby, her eyes glinting. "I wouldn't have chosen it to be done here, of all the places."
Xehanort considered her. He glanced around, extending his finely honed, magical senses. After a minute, he spoke again. "I am willing to entertain the possibility that my younger self spoke the truth - that you are indeed her. Though how, I have not the faintest idea. Perhaps you could enlighten me."
The woman sighed again, looking down and away. She looked rather weary. She shook her head, then lifted it again. She glided her fingers over the surface of her tangled, curly black hair. After she was finished inspecting herself, she let her hands fall. Then, a single arm was raised, and - in a flash of light - a Keyblade appeared in her grasp. It was an extravagant, garish weapon, with purple handle and guard, a gold and purple blade...and it was adorned with several golden stars on the hilt, the blade's end, and even on the blade itself. There was a golden sun on the very tip of the weapon, with spikes surrounding it - meant to represent rays of light.
Xehanort eyed the weapon with fascination. Then, the woman herself. He allowed himself a small chuckle. "If you truly are her, I would not have thought a humble woman such as you would have had such a...flamboyant weapon."
"It was simple, in the beginning," she replied, giving him a smile. Warm, true. As hers always had been...could it truly be her...? "This is after several upgrades."
"Upgrades?"
"I used Mythral Shards, Adamantite, Mystic Stones - and many other materials - and infused my Keyblade with them to make it more powerful."
"Not an unheard of practice, in our circles," Xehanort remarked, nodding in acceptance.
The woman lowered her weapon to her side - yet still held it in her grasp. Her eyes found his again. Her smile faded. "Why don't we exchange information, Xehanort. A pact of honesty and truthfulness."
"What are you proposing?" Xehanort said, curious.
"I will tell you everything I know, about myself, about the past - everything. But first, I want you to tell me...about how your life has gone since the islands. Since Scala Ad Caelum. I want to know how you went from the boy I knew, to the man you are now. I want to know...the things you've done, across these worlds, to so many people. Be honest, be open, hold nothing back. I already have a good idea of the terrible scale of things you've done, and the ways you've hurt people. But I want to hear it from your own mouth, Xehanort."
Xehanort tilted his head at her, puzzled. "You ask for a pact of honesty, yet the only information you demand are things you surely already know from my enemies? You wish me to provide you with a listing of my movements and actions up until now?"
"Then you shouldn't have a problem with telling them to me, should you."
Xehanort gazed at her, narrowing his eyes. Thinking. Why demand that which she should already know? Surely his enemies would have regaled her with tale after tale of his "evils"? Was she hoping to uncover some information he may have overlooked, some clue or hint to his...? No, there was nothing to be learned of what he intended to do now from what he had once done. His attempts to gain Kingdom Hearts were all over with. The Princess of Heart and others had been at the forefront of thwarting those plans of his - she could merely ask them whatever she liked. They would doubtless be eager to tell all...
They already knew what his Heartless and Nobody had done - and what he had done ten years prior.
So why?
What was her angle? What was the point?
Assuming she was Amaya, assuming she would be truthful in return...fine, then. He would tell her what she wished to know, could have easily learned already from other sources. It was nothing to him, and after he had told her, he would get to know what he wanted from her. True, valuable information. Only he stood to gain from this exchange.
He told her the truth.
He told her of his travels around the many worlds after Scala, seeing them for what they were. Infested with darkness, grown by the teeming masses, too weak to control their own Hearts! He told her the unvarnished truth of his Heart's ideals - of his many plans gone awry. His experiments, the destruction and death, Eraqus's slaying, the taking of young Terra's body, the split into Heartless and Nobody, and their individual parts in his plans that had been played out. He watched her face the entire time - watching those eyes grow so big, watching them begin to glisten...
He felt satisfaction and pleasure, as he wove his tale on further and in more detail. He told her of the time he had been bereft of memory - the search for truth, the experiments on people's Hearts and minds, the young Princess of Heart's abduction...
He saw the way that her lips trembled. He noted how her fingers curved around the hilt of her weapon, still in her hand...
He saw the golden energy swirl around the Keyblade, casting off sparks and bursts of light. A contained, great power, on the verge of being unleashed (Xehanort was almost eager for it, to see her break, to see her lash out at him, wondering just how powerful and skilled his childhood mentor might truly be compared with himself). But, to his mild disappointment, she did not attack him. The energy faded away. Though the weapon remained in her grasp.
He watched her, simply waiting for her response. Whatever it would be. Rage? Spite? Denouncement as "evil" or "a monster"? A scolding for all of his "crimes"?
She stepped forward, suddenly...
Xehanort clenched his hand behind his back, ready to draw his own weapon in an instant...
She slowly raised her arms and- embraced him? It was so shockingly unexpected - the very furthest thing he could have imagined - that he did not even have the presence of mind to stop her.
"I'm sorry..." she spoke at last, in a voice of choked emotion. "If I hadn't disappeared from your life that day...none of this would have happened to you. And you would not have gone on to do all of this to others."
Xehanort forced a laugh, shoving her away with force. She stumbled, righted herself again, gazing at him...with sorrow. With- "I do not need PITY," Xehanort snapped out. "Spare me your foolish emotions, woman."
"It's even sadder to think that you might actually believe that. Your Heart...it was so wonderful, and bright, and true...but now...it's so broken," Amaya spoke. "But it's not too late to fix it."
"Fix it? Fix me? How will you do that?" Xehanort snarled. "Will you raise all of my friends from the dead-"
"Why haven't you?"
Xehanort paused. "Eh?"
"You have the power to bring anyone through time - with Medium and Memory, or Replica bodies," Amaya went on. "So why haven't you done it? Why not bring them all back again - let them live here, now? Master Luxu's already done it for his friends. You saw it. So why don't you do the same for yours? Or are you so broken that you don't even care for them anymore? You've even brought your own self here from the past; you can do the same for your lost friends. You can give them another chance to live."
Xehanort was, as was so uncommon an occurrence in his life...at a loss. He had no idea what response to formulate. Mainly because he... "I- have never given it thought before," he confessed, grudging and halting.
"Well then..." Amaya gazed at him.
Xehanort raised his eyebrow at her, nonplussed. "What...?"
"Do it."
"I will do as I please," Xehanort responded roughly.
"You don't care, then. They're nothing to you now. You've become so empty, you're more of a hollow shell of a man than this Nobody of yours."
"Do not presume to know the contents of my Heart!" Xehanort said furiously, stepping toward her.
The woman did not flinch, did not retreat. She simply looked him in the face - in the eyes. Directly and unfailingly. It was a level of absolute...resolve, determination, that Xehanort had never seen in anyone before. There was not a hint of fear, worry, alarm...nothing. He could almost have believed she were a Nobody. "I wouldn't do that. But I know more than you might want to admit. More than anyone. Just like you know more about mine. Because that is the bond we share, Xehanort. And it will never go away."
"Do you truly wish me to bring them back to this World?" Xehanort said, turning away instead. "They would be decades out of time - they would learn their efforts were for nothing. They would all look upon me and see not a friend, but an enemy. An evil to be extinguished. A monster to be slain. Just the same way that you-"
"I don't see a monster when I look at you, Xehanort. I see a boy who lost everything, and lost himself because of it. Don't make up lies about me. I thought we were being honest with each other."
"Regardless of your warped perception of me," Xehanort went on scathingly. "they would see differently. Shall I inflict that fate upon them? Should they be told their home was ravaged, abandoned? That their Master gave up and went into hiding like some lowly coward? That everyone they fought for was killed? That everything they believed in amounted to nothing?"
"It would be devastating, yes. But we could help them through it."
"They would try to kill me, or run to join my opposition, the moment they learned of who I am and what I have done."
"And you say that without any self awareness? If you didn't act so cruel, so ruthless and cold, people would be more willing to accept you and your goals. Your intentions and end goal might have some basis in nobility and goodness, but your actions...the ends justify the means has never been a method rational, moral people can endorse. Have you not stopped to think that in trying so desperately to save the World, that you've been doing it more harm than help? That you've become the very thing you hated - that stole away your friends, that shattered your Heart with this pain, this grief?"
"The World needs someone to stand up and lead! Someone strong - someone to dictate their destiny!" Xehanort proclaimed. "Someone willing to go to any and all lengths to save them - even if that means wiping them all away in favor of a new start. A world in balance. A World where the weak and foolish will not pollute it with their endless darkness! There will be no more Scala Ad Caelums, there will be no more Darkness plaguing the worlds! Can you not see that it is NECESSARY? What is the alternative? What is the solution? To let these worlds remain as they are? Festering? Degrading?"
"Is this really about saving the World - or is it about putting yourself atop it? You've convinced yourself that you are the only one strong enough, wise enough, smart enough to save the World. That you're the only one willing to do what needs to be done. It's arrogance. it's ego. It's pride. Even if that were true, you're not that person, Xehanort. You will never be that person. You've become too clever for your own good - or the World's."
"Then who is?" Xehanort challenged, curling his lip at her. "If I am truly the Child of Destiny, as you told me yourself all those years ago, then am I not destined to be the only one capable of doing so? Do you speak of yourself, then? Or perhaps you speak of my enemies? The ones who run around, frantically trying to salvage these ruined worlds! Fighting for what is not worth saving!"
"Someone who at least has empathy, compassion, and kindness in their Heart. Who can truly look at the problems these worlds face and try to make the best choices for them - out of selflessness, out of goodness - not out of blinded ego and bias. You see what you want to see, Xehanort. You believe what you want to believe. You don't see what is truly there in front of you. And you don't see any of the people in front of you as people, do you? You call them weak, less, you've written them all off before you even tried to tackle the problem. Why should you be the best choice for a leader when you never even tried? You just jumped to the most extreme solution possible. That isn't the decision of a good, intelligent leader - but a deluded, broken man. Truthfully, ANYONE would be a better choice than you, Xehanort. You're far too self-righteous, and far too DAMAGED to see the world clearly, let alone to make decisions for anyone."
Xehanort gazed at her, seething, wanting to strike her down - the rage coursing in his veins was unbelievable. That word she called him rang in his ears: DAMAGED. That was truly how she thought of him? That was ALL she saw him as...? Yet, as he stood there, gazing at her face, into those eyes of hers...the eyes that had not once wavered, not once flinched or shied away - eyes that had in fact intensified into a fury of pure will and determination...
Xehanort found the rage leaving him, somehow. He found his body relaxing. He bowed his head slightly, closing his eyes. A small smile tugged at his lips. "Hmph...you remind me of my old friend..."
"The friend that you killed. Did you feel any remorse, or was it another necessity for your grand plans?"
Xehanort was silent. He looked away, gritting his teeth.
"I want an answer, Xehanort."
"I do not have to tell you anything."
She laughed. "So the child I knew is still in there somewhere. That was very petulant of you!"
"SILENCE!"
"No. You will listen to me, and you will answer me."
"You believe yourself to be that powerful?" Xehanort scoffed. "I can and will silence you if you continue speaking to me this way, woman. Childhood memories hold no power over me! I will cut you down if I must!"
"Oh, child, do you think I fear death?" Amaya stepped closer, pushing her face in his - and she laughed in his face. And then, she reached down, seized his wrist...and brought his blade up to rest against her own neck. "I've already died twice before, Xehanort. I know exactly what will happen to me, and where I'll go. And it's not something I'm afraid of; it was honestly the most peaceful place I have ever been to in my three lifetimes combined. I doubt you can say the same...can you?"
Xehanort gazed at her - then he stepped back, turning away, wrenching his weapon out of her grasp.
She was telling the truth. Somehow, whatever she was talking about...he felt it in his Heart. It was the truth...
What was this? What was she? What...
"Listen to someone else for once in your life, instead of believing you hold all the answers!" Amaya spoke after him. "Closing yourself off to all advice and criticism is the act of a fool and an idiot - and it leads to terrible mistakes. If you keep your Heart and mind open, you might actually be more effective in what you're trying to accomplish. You might see better results than you've achieved so far. Because, clearly, none of this is working, Xehanort! You're only making the worlds worse, you're amassing powerful and varied enemies, and you're even further away from your goal than you ever were before. You're slipping, you're losing, and you're failing. And, most of all: you're LOST. You don't know what to do, or where to go anymore. But if you would just listen to me, I could give you direction - I could help you. Just like I always have. Just like you always have let me."
Amaya's hand was suddenly on his bare arm. He felt a surge of emotions, a wave through his body, and into his Heart.
He looked over at her, glowering. But she didn't remove her hand - nor did she even balk at the look he gave her. Not even a twitch of the smallest muscles in her face.
"You have the time, power, and patience to try something new - don't you?" Amaya said quietly. "What can it hurt you? What will you lose? What are you afraid of - simply admitting that you were wrong? That the choices you've made, the path you've chosen, was the wrong one?"
"Quiet." Xehanort made to pull away from her-
Her hand tightened around his arm, pulling him back, shocking him. "Give me a real answer. Or can I take your attempts to blow me off as a concession, child?"
Xehanort stared at her, breathing heavily. His hand twitched at his side...
"Very well..." he uttered. "Tell me, then. Tell me how you would save the World. Tell me what your brilliant plan is. If you know so much better than I, if you can see so much more clearly than I...then enlighten me!"
"First, you need to accept a simple fact of reality."
"And what would that be?"
"That the World isn't perfect, and it is never going to be. Even if you were to gain power over Kingdom Hearts, even if you used it to reset the World, I doubt the new World will be what you imagine. It won't be a perfect place, and the people within it won't be perfect either. What you want is impossible. You need to accept these worlds as they are, and fight for them as they are. You need to see the wonders and the good within them - the good and wonderful people. After the tragedy you experienced, you went around these worlds and saw nothing but more tragedy - more darkness. More losses and suffering. And you wanted to end it all. And that isn't necessarily wrong. But if you only focus on the bad, you miss all the good. The things that make life worth living to begin with - worth saving. You need to care again, Xehanort. You need to feel again. And not just grief, rage, spite, anger, hatred - but amusement, joy, happiness, love, compassion. The things you once knew, and cherished, for being worth it."
Xehanort gazed at her in silence.
"I know that you are afraid to let yourself feel again - to bond again - and risk losing it all again, but that is life, Xehanort! We fight, we love, and sometimes, yes, we lose...but we don't just give up on everything. We persevere, we remain strong, and true to our Hearts, and to the people we love. Your problem, Xehanort, is that you broke under the weight of tragedy - and you're still being crushed by it. But if you would let me, I can help you lift that weight off of you again."
"You think I am BROKEN, do you?"
"Are you not?" Amaya gazed back at him fearlessly. "Compare yourself to the Princess of Heart and her friends - after all the tragedies, the grief, the loss and punishments that you have put them through - have they ever given up? Have they ever broken? Decided to abandon their ideals, their own Hearts and the bonds they have between them? Have they decided to wash their hands of the worlds? Or are they still fighting for them, staying true to themselves, and fighting you - together? Perhaps they are the ones actually worthy of being entrusted with the World's future. Because they are strong enough not to lose Heart, to not lose themselves - unlike you. They have fought and won against all odds, against all your power and planning, and they have not seen it necessary to sacrifice an ounce of who they are inside to do it. Be honest with yourself, for once: it isn't that you're strong enough to cast off your feelings and bonds to do what has to be done; it's that you're too weak to hold on to them while still accomplishing your goals. A truly strong person wouldn't have to sacrifice anything - would cast aside nothing. You're just a very weak man who is only pretending to be strong, trying to justify it all to yourself and to others!"
The woman turned away from him, slinging out her Keyblade to conjure a portal of light.
Xehanort could only stare after her, her words ringing in his ears. Words that were incredibly familiar: strikingly so. For they had once come from his own lips, as a young man...
"They are but sheep pretending to be wolves..."
"Using hollow reasons as justifications..."
Those beliefs of his, pushed and validated by the man he now knew was the Master of Luxu, one who had planned and manipulated Xehanort's life since before even his birth...
Could they be wrong, then? Beliefs he'd been made to hold for the sake of another's schemes? To mold him into the person they needed him to be? But if it truly was the plan for Xehanort to become who he was now, to act as others desired he act, then the only true way to ensure his destiny was his own, to cast off the shackles of fate, would be to act in ways other than he was. To be counter to...
But if so, then what was left for Xehanort...? Who was he - who could he have been? Who should he be...?
If not this road...then what?
Everything he had worked for, all he had done...all he could still do...
No: he could do this! He knew he could succeed! He knew it...he just...he just...
Just before Amaya disappeared into the light, Xehanort called out to her, reaching out for her. "Wait!"
To his surprise, she stopped. She turned back to look at him, fully and completely. Her eyes found his once more.
Xehanort swallowed, hard, bowing his head. Clenching his fists at his sides. He felt more like the lost, drowning teenager in full than he had in decades now.
"What is it, child?" she spoke to him gently.
In that moment, he saw it. He felt it. Emotions flowed into his Heart once more - images ran through his mind's eye - memories of times past, and times he had never been-
And he knew...
It was her.
"...Amaya..." he breathed.
Suddenly, everything just...drained from his body. His shoulders fell, his hands uncurled, and a great, weary sigh escaped him.
The woman stood, gazing at him. Unmoving. Blinking slowly. Waiting...? For what?
"Stay - stay with me," Xehanort pleaded, in a voice that sounded so thin and weak to his own ears, even despite the youthful form he was embodying. "Tell me...about yourself. About...about- mother. Moreth - yes? And, I would like to...talk more with you about your- ideas, as well. Perhaps it is time I considered...alternative ways of thinking...different - methods to achieve my goals. Clearly, what I have been doing thus far has not been...effective. The results have not been- satisfactory. Things are only- getting out of hand. Slipping. I am...slipping. As you said, I- it is only leading to more darkness, and to enemies, and even my own younger self- perhaps it is...enough."
He stopped, staring at her, desperation clawing in his brittle Heart, truly feeling its age now, and nothing more. "I wish to see my friends again," he whispered, the truest, unburdened desire of his Heart.
She smiled. She approached him, simply and easily. Unafraid, unintimidated. Unjudging. Those eyes of hers simply...
It was her.
"If that is what your Heart wants, then I'll help you make it happen."
Master Xehanort closed his eyes of gold, his mind drifting back to remember times spent with her, and with all of them, and...with his best friend...
In the bright study room, in the world of Scala ad Caelum, Xehanort was gazing down at the sole, remaining piece on the game board, sitting in the window. Sunlight streamed through, warming him.
Eraqus smiled at him. " I told you that you might be surprised."
Xehanort smiled back, turning away. "Yeah, you got me."
"Huh? Really?"
"What?"
"It's just, you never admit it when you lose."
"That's 'cause I never lose," Xehanort declared smugly.
"Oh, come on!"
They laughed together, warm feelings filling Xehanort's Heart. So easy, so simple, when Eraqus was around.
"Ahhh...good game today," Xehanort said lightly - so easily.
"I try."
"Maybe I won't go as far as you..." Xehanort said wistfully, turning back toward his friend.
"Huh?" Eraqus looked at him in confusion.
Xehanort leaned forward, flicking at the game piece of his opponent, amusing himself. "When the World needs a defender, they'll pick you, Eraqus."
"Y-you think?" Eraqus said, sheepish - surprised.
Xehanort leaned in, gazing at the boy with a soft smile. "But that doesn't mean...that I can't be there for you."
Eraqus blinked. Then he grinned. "Yeah. And I'll be there for you."
In the present, Xehanort opened his eyes anew...and he gave a small smile. Checkmate, indeed, old friend...